REFLECTION

Members: ( BSN 2 YA-6 )

-PATRICIO, NOEMI

-MIQUE, CHARIZ

- ARNUCO, ALEXIS

-MAYNIGO, ERICA

-TUIBUEN, JULIANA

Instructions:

Think about a specific scenario: times when your close friend feels bad about himself or
herself or is really struggling in some way. How did you respond to your friend in this
situation (especially when you’re at your best)? Please write down your responses
following the five elements of compassion discussed by Strauss, et al., 2016.

1. Recognizing suffering of others

Answer:

When you try to put yourself in their shoes, you will realize that behind that happy face
is a lonely person. He was my best friend in high school; he is smart. Before we became
best friends, he had his own group of friends, and I thought they were his real friends,
but after a year they started fighting, and his friend told him that they only used him
because he was smart. He struggles a lot at that time and even cries. And because he
is very poor—he doesn’t even have a cellphone; he just borrows mine—he can’t afford
to buy food, which is why I buy it for him. I know he feels shy because he always
borrows money from me, but he helps me with my studies, and it’s okay if he asks for
help from me. We suffer together; our classmates laugh at us when we are together,
and it broke my heart. How could they do that? After a year of getting to know each
other, we became best friends, maybe because I saw myself in him. I know that we are
both suffering, and I try to be in his comfort zone so he can tell me what his problems
are. We study together because we want to prove ourselves to those who belittle us. On
our graduation day, the biggest flex was that he graduated as a valedictorian and I
graduated as a salutatorian.

2. Understanding the common humanity of this suffering.

Answer:

Humans face hardships, and all these hardships are accompanied by emotional distress
and pain. Some people have to suffer more than others, which causes humans to
question the dissatisfaction and unfairness of life. I understand that he is suffering
emotionally and financially, but when you try to understand that you are both suffering,
you will realize that every random passerby is living a life just as vivid and complex as
your own. I am the only person who can guide him. That is why, whenever he asks for
help, I always help him.

3. Feeling emotionally connected with the person who is suffering

Answer:

When I first saw him, I didn’t realize that we would become best friends. He is just a
stranger to me, but when my friends and I fight for reasons that they don’t understand
my situation, blame me every time, and even tell our adviser my secret, my trust in them
fades like dust in the wind. I trusted them and treated them like my younger sister. All
my classmates bullied me, sending me home alone and making me eat alone. I
approached him personally, talked to him every day, and when I talk to him, I think he is
the innocent and purest guy on earth. You can see in his eyes that he is the person you
can trust, and it’s been 4 years, and he is still my best friend.

4. What difficult feelings did you experience during that situation?

Answer:

I think the most difficult feeling I had at the time was not knowing how to approach him
about wanting to be his friend, and the fear that he might not wish to talk to me. The fear
of rejection.

5. What was your motivation to help the person?

Maynigo, Erica:

My motivation to help the person is self-satisfaction and joy. The feeling I got after
helping the person is undoubtedly one of the best feelings I have ever experienced. It
gives me joy when I simply give food and drink to a hungry homeless old man since I
gave what he needed and what he wanted a smile flashes on his face By that, it gives
me satisfaction because I know he is happy and grateful for what I gave, so i want to
help again even if it's the same individual or a different one but I wish to assist more.
QUESTION NO. 2 (25 POINTS)

think of an occasion on which you were in difficult communication with someone, or felt
aversion towards them; and then, suddenly, a greater understanding of their viewpoint
or life experience brought a feeling of care, concern, empathy, or warmth for them.How
did you come up understanding that person using your own experience?

Arnuco, Alexiz:

There is this event wherein I was in a jeepney when suddenly a group of badjao came
in and asked for money from all passengers. They beg us to give them even a small
amount of money or a penny so that they can buy some food for them. A kid annoyingly
beg for money from me, but I was hesitant to give him any because I thought they were
just using it for wrong doings like drugs and doing it like a job. I also thought to myself
that their parents should get a real job to be able to provide their family with food and
shelter with their own money. But later on, when I came back to our house, there was
this news wherein the reporter was interviewing one of the badjaos I saw in the jeepney.
They explained that they did not want to beg for money and that is not what they do for
a living; it just happened that someone scammed them by saying that they could find a
wonderful environment and neighborhood in the city compared to the province, and they
trusted him with their money. After I saw the news about them, I felt so bad about myself
and suddenly understood what they were doing.

Maynigo, Erica:

I have already answered during the class hours (recitation).

Mique, Chariz:

On one occasion, my friends and I were on our way to one of our friends’ house after
class to hang out, and I unintentionally dropped my wallet. My monthly allowance was
kept in my wallet. After a few seconds, I realized I'd misplaced my wallet, and when I
turned around, there it was, lying on the ground a few steps away. We were on our way
to get it when a truck honked, indicating that it was going to pass by, so we walked to
the side of the road.But then the truck came to a complete stop right next to my wallet.
The truck driver got out of the car and took my wallet. I was about to approach the
driver, expecting him to hand it over to me. To my surprise, the truck driver jumped into
the vehicle and drove away. My friends attempted to chase the truck, but vehicles are
obviously much faster than them. I stood there, perplexed. I was at a loss for what to do,
so I chanted a silent prayer to God. When my friends approached me, I smiled and told
them that everything was fine and that maybe the man needed it more than I did. But
deep down, I'm still worried and anxious. I had no idea how to tell my parents or how to
get through the month because it was only the second week. So I prayed and prayed
that the Lord would help me understand what had happened and that I would be able to
survive the month without any allowance. Till such time, I was able to accept that
everything that happened had a purpose and hoped that my money would help the man
with his problem. In the end, I was still fortunate because my friends genuinely helped
me by purchasing a snack for me, and when I told my parents about the incident, they
understood and gave me yet another allowance for the month.

Patricio, Noemi:

This happened way back in 2016 or 2017. I experienced abuse from my relatives; my
tita slapped me many times, and I just kept quiet because I respected them. The reason
why they slapped me was because my cousin told them that I had a boyfriend, despite
the fact that I didn't because I was working at that time. In front of my friends, she
slapped me, shouted bad words, and even pointed a knife in my face. I couldn’t breathe;
all I could do was cry silently. What should I do? Even if I tell them that my cousin is
telling a lie, they will never believe me. And last year, when I went home, I sewed them.
I don’t know if I can forgive them. All I did was pray, wishing that I could forgive them.
When I hear from their side that they only care about me and want me to be good, I
understand that they want to protect me because my parents are far away from us but
are hurting me, slapping me many times until my face swells. I will never forget that.
The trauma that they give me will be in my heart forever.

Tuibuen, Juliana:

I think the best example that I can give for this question is when there is a family
gathering event. I don't have a complete family; I have a mother but don't have a father
because he left us when I was 3 years old. That's the most terrifying event of my life.
When talking about family, I can relate, especially when talking about having a father,
because I know the feeling of not being loved by a father, and I can't feel the love that I
deserve. So, I understand the feeling of not having a complete family, and because of
that, I have already accepted it. I should not stay in the dark and think about the past,
but instead, I should move forward to the positive things that might happen in the future.
When someone feels that same experience as me, I know what words to give and how
to show my care by telling them that they need to be stronger for themselves and fight
for what is right. I understand that you have to move on from the past in order to
become a better person in the future.