Narrator

Our journey starts at the Palace of Sparta, Helen looks at the

necklace gifted by Paris nervously.

INT. Palace of Sparta – Night

Paris
Don’t be afraid of him (Menalaus).
Helen
I’m not afraid of dying, I’m afraid of tomorrow. I’m afraid of
watching you sail away and knowing you’ll never come back. Before
you came to Sparta, I was a ghost, I walked, and I ate, and I
swam in the ocean. But I was just a ghost.
Paris
You don’t have to fear tomorrow. Come with me.

Helen looks at Paris with doubt in her eyes.

Helen
Don’t play with me, don’t play.
Paris
If you come, we’ll never be safe. Men will hunt us, the Gods will
curse us. But I’ll love you. Till the day they burn my body.

Narrator
The same day, far, far away, in the Palace of Mycenae.
INT. Palace of Mycenae – Same Day

Menalaus
I want her back.
Agamemnon
Well, of course you do. She’s a beautiful woman.

Menalaus says with aggression.

Menalaus
Well, I want her back so I can kill her with my own two hands. I
won’t rest untill I’ve burned Troy to the ground.
Agamemnon
Hah, I thought you wanted peace with Troy.

Agamemnon lets out a short laugh.

Agamemnon
Peace is for the women and the weak. Empires are forged by war.
Menalaus
Brother all my life I’ve stood by your side and fought your
enemies. You’re the elder, you reap the glory. But have I ever
complained? Have I ever asked you for anything?
Agamemnon
Never. You’re a man of honor.
Menalaus
An insult to me is an insult to you, and an insult to you is an
insult to all of Greek. So, will you go to war with me, brother?
Agamemnon ponders upon the idea for a while and smiles at the
thought of taking over Troy.

Agamemnon
For the sake of honor, I will.

Narrator
The Greeks prepare for war against the Trojans. Odysseus, King of
Ithaca, persuades Achilles to join them. Achilles strongly
dislikes Agamemnon but eventually joins them as he realizes that
he can show off his skills and heels to the Trojans. The Trojans
prepare for war. The war begins and Achilles along with his
Myrmidons attacks first and sacks the Temple of Apollo. As all
this is going on, Hector approaches the temple slowly, looking
everywhere for Achilles.

INT. Temple of Apollo – Day

Achilles
You’re very brave or very stupid to come after me alone.

Achilles laughs.

Achilles
You must be Vector. Do you know who I am?
Hector
It’s Hector. These priests weren’t armed.
Achilles
Yes. There’s no honor in cutting old men’s throats.
 Hector
Well only children and fools fight for honor. I fight for my
country.

Narrator
Hector runs towards Achilles and shouts.

Hector
Fight me!

Achilles replies with a grin.

Achilles
Why kill you now, Prince of Troy, when there’s no one else to see
you fall? That’s just boring.
Hector
Why did you come here?
Achilles
They’ll be talking about this war for thousands of years, after
we’re gone.
Hector
In thousand years the dust from our bones will be gone quite
literally.
Achilles
Go home Prince, drink some wine, make love to your wife. Tomorrow
we’ll have our war.
Hector
 You speak of war as if it’s Call of Duty. Do you know how many
wives wait at Troy’s gates for husbands knowing they’ll never
meet again?
Achilles
Hm. Well your brother could comfort them. I hear he’s very good
at charming other men’s wives.

Narrator
Achilles winks and gestures Hector to run back. The Greeks take
Briseis hostage, whom Achilles falls in love with. But Agamemnon
mistreats her which results in Achilles getting angry, and he
decides he won’t aid Agamemnon in the next siege. Meanwhile, the
Trojans are plotting their next move. That night, in the palace
of Troy, Paris stands up during the meeting and announces.

INT. Palace of Troy – Night

Paris
There won’t be a war. This is not a conflict of nations. It is a
dispute between two men. Tomorrow morning, I will challenge
Menalaus. The winner will take Helen home and the loser will die
before nightfall.

Paris raises his eyebrows nervously.

Paris
Hopefully, I’m not the loser.

INT. Palace Garden – Same Night

 Paris
Father, I’m sorry for the pain I’ve caused you.
Priam
Do you love her?
Paris
You’re a great king, you love Troy. Every blade of grass. Every
grain of sand. Every rock in the river. You love all of Troy.
That is the way I love Helen.

Priam looks at a statue.

Priam
I’ve fought many wars in my life. Some were fought for land, some
for power, some for glory. But I suppose fighting for love makes
more sense than the rest.

Priam bluntly says.

Priam
But I won’t be the one fighting so goodluck.

Priam takes out a sword.

Priam
Here, my father carried this sword, and his father before him all
the way back to-

Priam coughs.
 Priam
All the way back to the founding of Troy. Carry it with you
tomorrow. This sword has the spirit of Troy in it. So as long as
a Trojan carries it, our people have a future.
Narrator
Paris takes the sword while regretting his decision now. The next
day in the battlefield. Paris challenges Menalaus.

INT. Battlefield – Next Day

Paris
I love Helen and I won’t give her up either. Let’s fight our own
battle. The winner will take her home. Let that be the end of it.

Menalaus confidently says.

Menalaus
I accept your challenge. And tonight, I will drink to your bones.

Narrator
The two prepare for battle. Let us see whose love is stronger.

Paris starts running back as soon as the fight begins. Menalaus

surprised, asks him why he is running.

Menalaus asks Helen in disbelief.

 Menalaus
Is this what you left me for?!

Helen, confused and says.

Helen
Not really but ok.

Narrator
Hector kills Menalaus to save his brother, and Agamemnon wages a
losing war, so after few days, they hide inside a giant wooden
horse, which Priam thought was gift from the Gods and took it
inside the gates. At night the Greek soldiers come out of the
horse and attack everyone. Meanwhile, Achiles tries to find
Briseis.

INT. Palace of Troy – Night

Achilles looking around and shouts.

Achilles
Briseis! Where are you? Look at my heels they’re so expensive.

Narrator
As Achilles tries to find Briseis, Paris finds Achilles and seeks
revenge.

Paris says aggressively while holding the banana.

 Paris
And this is for my brother Vector.

Paris throws the banana at Achilles. Achilles screams as the

banana pierces his chest.

Achilles
See my shoes! What? Ah!

Achilles struggles to breathe but still says.

Achilles
Not kola (banana), kola (banana) is my weak point.

Narrator
Paris takes the Gucci heels to gift them to Helen.

Achilles shouts in pain.

Achilles
No! Not my $900 Gucci shoes!

Achilles struggles to breathe and says.

Achilles
So, this is how I go?
Achilles closes his eyes.

Narrator
And thus, Achilles takes his last breath. Paris flees to the
secret location along with the Gucci heels. The Greeks
successfully take over Troy.
The End.