Impson1

Clinton Impson

Emily Litle

English1021001

11 November 2022

Journal # 8

How do I impact the people around me? That is an interesting question. I believe now I

impact people in a positive way. But that has not always been the case, you see I spent a

significant amount of my life in active addiction. That means That due to my drug and alcohol

use I impacted people in a very negative way. My judgements were impaired, my reactions

were not healthy, and my decision making was horribly distorted. During that whole period of

time my life was spiraling out of control. The process took years to become such a problem that

I was finally forced to confront it. I am glad to say that today I am sober. I make better

decisions. Today I am able to honestly look at the impact I have on my loved ones and the

people I interact with.

I have four children from two different marriages. My youngest son is from my first

marriage. He is 21 now unfortunately he suffers from the disease of addiction as well. When he

grew up, I was not always there for him. His mother and I split up shortly after he was born as a

result I had to struggle at times to even see him. I feel horrible about not being able to spend

the time he needed me to. I am now trying to make up for that. I got sober about three and a

half years ago. I am struggling to help him through a disease that I know all too much about.
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But strangely enough the struggle has strengthened our relationship. Through his effort and a

great deal of encouragement and prayer from me he is making progress.

My three oldest children aren’t my blood, but I spent a significant amount of time with

them in their lives. Being their stepfather, I know taught me a lot about being a dad and I was

able to help them through school and some of their trials in life. Sometimes blood isn’t what

makes you family sometimes love makes you family. About six years ago their mother was

murdered and they watched me fall apart. But through it all they stood by me, they watched

me come through the darkest part of our lives and somehow emerge to a brighter day. Today

all four of my children support me. They are proud of me and that is the best feeling I have ever

had. Things are not perfect they never will be but they are better and better is good enough

right now.

Many of the friends that watched me go through my darkest hours have miraculously

stuck by me and I thank them for that. Their support has meant the world to me. I have made

friends in this community and without them I could not have made the recovery from addiction.

I hope that those friends are able to reap some benefits of some very difficult lessons I have

learned. My friends both old and new have told me I am a better person and that is an

incredible feeling to have them encourage me and to confirm that I am making progress. I know

that without the love and support of these wonderful people that God has put in my path I

would not be as far as I am. I can only hope that I have made a tenth of the impact they have

made on me.
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I don’t know whether I am making a good impact on my loved ones. But I know today I

am trying.