oh-what-the-heel-cover.

pdf 1 8/14/22 9:22 PM

KAREN ROBINSON

CM

MY
Oh!
What the

HEEL
CY

CMY

52 WAYS TO STEP OUT OF A RUT

WEEKLY DEVOTIONAL
© 2022 Karen Robinson

All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be

reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in
any form or by any means—electronic, mechanical,
photocopy, recording, scanning, or other—except for
brief quotations in critical reviews or articles, without
the prior written permission of the author.

Published in United States of America, by Chakar

Publishing.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

[[to include ISBN 10 and ISBN-13]]

Printed in the United States of America

10 11 12 13 14 [[Printer Code]] 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
INTRODUCTION

“Oh, what the…” It’s often the comment we use to

signal our resignation after we’ve decided to throw up
our hands and give up because we’ve determined that
there is no way to victory or out of a dilemma. We’ve
all had moments when we felt like we were stuck in a
rut and felt this is just how it’s going to be. But I’m
reminded of a quote I once heard: “A rut is a grave with
both ends kicked out.” I believe a rut is nothing more
than a minor inconvenience that can be conquered,
when given the right steps...

Oh, What the Heel! is a devotional that offers practical

steps and gentle weekly reminders to help you STEP out
of the rut and into your calling.
Table of Contents
INTRODUCTION

Step 1 Be Yourself ........................................................................ 1

Step2 Be Disciplined..................................................................... 7

Step 3 Get Rid of It! .................................................................... 11

Step 4 Look Within ..................................................................... 15

Step 5 Network .......................................................................... 19

Step 6 Visualize .......................................................................... 23

Step 7 Keep Stepping ................................................................. 27

Step 8 Be Full of Yourself ........................................................... 30

Step 9 Control Your thoughts .................................................... 33

Step 10 Take Action ................................................................... 37

Step 11 Don’t Give Up................................................................ 41

Step 12 Broaden Your Perspective............................................. 45

Step 13 Step into Your Destiny .................................................. 49

Step 14 Step Out of the Box ....................................................... 53

Step 15 Embrace Change ........................................................... 57

Step 16 Step Outside the Line .................................................... 61

Step 17 Keep Score .................................................................... 65

Step 18 Finish Strong ................................................................. 68

Step 19 Get Back on Track ......................................................... 72

Step 20 Dream Again ................................................................. 76

Step 21 Let Go of the Past.......................................................... 79

Step 22 Be Friendly .................................................................... 83

Step 23 Be Your Best .................................................................. 87

Step 24 Put Your Best Foot Forward .......................................... 90

Step 25 Listen ............................................................................. 94

Step 26 Look Around................................................................ 100

Step 27 Don’t Cheat the Process ............................................. 104

Step 28 Step Up to the Plate .................................................... 107

Step 29 Get Back Up ................................................................ 111

Step 30 Don’t Procrastinate ..................................................... 115

Step 31 Fight Like a Girl............................................................ 119

Step 32 Pick Your Battles ......................................................... 123

Step 33 Stay Centered.............................................................. 127

Step 34 Be Flexible ................................................................... 131

Step 35 Don’t Be Fear-Driven .................................................. 135

Step 36 Stay Within Your Jurisdiction ...................................... 139

Step 37 Follow Instructions...................................................... 143

Step 38 Get in Where You Fit ................................................... 147

Step 39 Create a Path............................................................... 150

Step 40 Check Your Rear View Mirror ..................................... 155

Step 41 Crawl, Walk, and Run .................................................. 159

Step 42 Stay in the Game ......................................................... 162

Step 43 Play Well With Others ................................................. 165

Step 44 Hold the Door Open .................................................... 168

Step 45 Connect the Dots ........................................................ 172

Step 46 Gather the Fragments ................................................. 176

Step 47 Spend Your Time Wisely ............................................. 180

Step 49 Make It Your Own ....................................................... 188

Step 50 Control Your Emotions ................................................ 191

Step 51 Dress Nicely…Always................................................... 195

STEP 52 Say, “I’m Sorry”.......................................................... 199

Step 1 Be Yourself

Step1 |1
Y ou’re a designer’s original. STOP. Read that again.
YOU ARE A DESIGNER’S ORIGINAL! You
were strategically and intentionally created. There
is no one better at being you than you. The best part of
you is to be completely you. You are the only one
qualified to be you. You are necessary. No one you
know would be the same without you. Don’t
compromise who you are for the sake of acceptance
because even though you may get “in” or accepted, you
won’t fit until you… your very own uniqueness is
present.

Step1 |2
Step 1: Be Yourself

“You are a Designer’s Original.”

Psalm 139:13–14

“For You formed my inward parts; You wove me in my

mother’s womb. I will give thanks to You, for I am
fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your
works and my soul knows it very well.”

We often focus on the qualities that make us just like

other people. Now, take a moment to remember the
qualities that make you unique!

1. Have you ever tried to “fit in”? What were the

circumstances?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
2. Have you ever waited for someone to complete you?
If so, why?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

Step1 |3
3.What traits did you forfeit to do so?
____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

4. How does this verse challenge you to think about your

own uniqueness?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

Step1 |4
Step1 |5
Step1 |6
Step2 Be Disciplined

Step2 |7
D iscipline requires commitment and will power,
including self-denial. It’s these traits in our
character that lead us from good to great. It’s
not just a matter of wanting what’s right; it’s a matter of
doing what’s right, one step at a time. Success is
governed by putting our dreams, or those things we say
we want, into disciplined actions. Without physical
actionable steps, discipline dies unborn.

Become disciplined, be consistent, and expect success.

Step2 |8
Step 2: Be Disciplined

“Success is governed by putting our dreams or those

things we want into disciplined action.”

Proverbs 1:7

“The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge;

Fools despise wisdom and instruction.”

1. What are the areas of your life that lack discipline?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

2. What keeps you from being disciplined?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

Step2 |9
3. Change happens one step at a time. What are the next
steps you need to take to bring discipline back into your
life? Name them!

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
4. How are you going to keep yourself focused without
the usual distractions?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 2 | 10
Step 3 Get Rid of It!

S t e p 3 | 11
W
e call them memories and knowledge.
BUT THEY’RE CLUTTER! Not only
are our homes cluttered, but our minds,
our emotions, and our spirits are cluttered, as well.
We have held onto hurts, disappointments,
victories, and achievements and they’re crowding
out the space for our success. We’ve kept a mental
scorecard of our successes as well as our failures
and for this reason; we’ve single-handedly
impeded our path of progress. Yesterday’s news is
old news, good or bad. It’s time to pull out the mental
and emotional trash bags and get rid of those things that
are cluttering our minds. We’ve accumulated so much
junk that we have lost ourselves in the midst of it. Get
rid of the clutter.

It’s hindering your progression.

S t e p 3 | 12
Step 3: Get Rid of It!

“Yesterday’s news is old news, good or bad.”

2 Corinthians 5:17

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.

The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.”

1. Mark an X next to any of the categories below that are

cluttering your mind.

__ Past Hurt __ A Relationship or Relationships

__ Failure __ Disappointments

__ Achievement __ Other__________________

2. Now it’s time to take out the mental and emotional

trash bags! Make a detailed list below of the things that
are cluttering your mind.

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 3 | 13
3. Decide in your heart and mind today that those things
listed above will no longer determine your future
successes. List steps below that you will take to get rid
of the clutter and then follow through.

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 3 | 14
Step 4 Look Within

S t e p 4 | 15
W e’re told to look ahead and focus on our
future, but we can only see as far out as we
can look within. Looking within is critically
important to our life journey because both our strengths
and weaknesses dwell within us. We should be well
acquainted with both! They are our inner guides to
purpose, and when properly acknowledged, they will
help keep us from straying away from our intended
path. In your quest to look ahead and get ahead, don’t
forget to look within.
Allow weakness to humble you and strength to escort
you

S t e p 4 | 16
Step 4: Look Within

“In your quest to look ahead and get ahead, don’t

forget to look within.”

Galatians 5:1

“For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore,

and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.”

1. Be acquainted with both your strengths and

weaknesses. Make a list of both.

Strengths

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

Weaknesses

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

2. In what ways do your weaknesses humble you?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 4 | 17
3. How can your strengths help you in your everyday
life?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 4 | 18
Step 5 Network

S t e p 5 | 19
G reat men and women have accomplished great
things with the power of networking. Yet, at the
same time, great men and women have both
aborted and delayed their destinies because of their
resistance to networking.
The wine is in the cluster, not in the grape. If we plan
to produce a significant amount of measurable substance,
we will have to network. Our destiny in life is tied to
another’s destiny, and so on and so on. Networking with
others is not an infringement upon our identity or
purpose. It is a divine protection and a guarantee that we
will accomplish all God has destined for us. Do not
walk alone.

S t e p 5 | 20
Step 5: Network

“If we plan to produce a significant amount of

measurable substance, we will have to network.”

Romans 12:4–6

“Just as each of us has one body with many members,

and these members do not all have the same function, so
in Christ we who are many, form one body, and each
member belongs to all the others. We have different
gifts, according to the grace given us.”

1. Give an example of a time when networking has

impacted your life.

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

2. Now give an example of a time when you chose to do

it “all by yourself.”
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 5 | 21
3. How could networking have aided you during this
time?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 5 | 22
Step 6 Visualize

S t e p 6 | 23
W
ithout a clear vision, you have no
foundation on which to base decisions,
spend your time, and use your resources.
You will tend to make choices based on
circumstances, pressures, and your mood at that
moment. People who don’t know their purpose try
to do too much and that causes stress, fatigue, and
conflict.
If you want to get to your destiny, you must first
visualize. Not having a clear vision of where
you’re going is a huge waste of time, energy, and
substance.
Get a vision and map out a path of success to get
there. Vision facilitates direction.

S t e p 6 | 24
Step 6: Visualize

“Not having a clear vision of where you’re going is a

huge waste of time, energy, and substance.”

Proverbs 29:18

“Where there is no vision, the people perish: but he that

keeps the law, happy is he.”

1. Take a few minutes to write out your purpose in life.

If you are unsure, write down five things that make you
feel the most fulfilled. These could be activities, causes,
or relationships.

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

Now, let this vision statement or list serve as a compass

to guide your daily decisions.

S t e p 6 | 25
2. How will you allow this vision to govern your
footsteps?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

3. What are some steps you can take to get closer in line
with your purpose?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 6 | 26
Step 7 Keep Stepping

S t e p 7 | 27
W e each long for the fulfillment of destiny
and purpose. However, destiny is only
fulfilled through a cycle of steps that lead
us from one point to another. There are people we
must meet, events we must encounter, victories we
must achieve, failures we must experience, and
steps we must take to fulfill our destiny. As we
venture out to reach our destiny, we are often
faced with detours, stoplights, roadblocks, and
sometimes messy substandard roadways. There
may be times when it seems like your destination
has been re-routed or blocked with
obstacles…keep stepping. Detours lead us to the
same place.

S t e p 7 | 28
Step 7: Keep Stepping

“Detours lead us to the same place.”

Jeremiah 29:11

“For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord,
plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give
you a hope and a future.”

1. Describe how this verse relates to your destiny.

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

2. Have you ever felt as though there were obstacles

between you and your destiny?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

3. How can you use those obstacles to your advantage in

the future?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 7 | 29
Step 8 Be Full of Yourself

S t e p 8 | 30
H
ave you ever heard someone say, “You are so
full of yourself”? It is usually said as a negative
connotation. But I believe you should be full of
yourself.
We understand and adhere to the warning of the gas
gage. In fact, we fill up our tanks quiet frequently. We
know that the amount of gas we have determines how far
we travel. Yet we ourselves are running on empty. We
have been polluted and diluted. Life’s situations and
circumstances have left us empty. They’ve robbed us of
us. We have been stripped and depleted. We are no
longer whole. We have become okay with flying at half-
mast. But our calling in life needs us to be full, vibrant,
and whole. Find your gas station and fill up. Be full of
yourself!

Self-confidence determines how far you will go.

S t e p 8 | 31
Step 8: Be Full of Yourself

“Our calling in life needs us to be full, vibrant, and

whole.”

Philippians 4:13

“I can do all things through him who strengthens me.”

1. What does be full, vibrant, and whole in your life look

like to you?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

2. Make a list of those things that will replenish your

“gas tank.”
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

3. What are some steps that you can take now to

completely believe in yourself?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 8 | 32
Step 9 Control Your thoughts

S t e p 9 | 33
O ur biggest challenge in life is not people, places,
or things, but the inability to control our
thoughts. Making the distinction between a good
and bad thought is critical. A good thought brings a
result and a bad one brings a consequence. Our good
thoughts are sustenance that helps us produce a healthy
and productive life, while the bad thoughts become a
hindrance to destiny. A runaway mind will keep us from
reaching spiritual, personal, and professional success.
Develop a practice of mental accountability and question
your thoughts. Is this a positive meditation? Is this
thought helpful? If not, cast it down and move on to one
that is.

Subject your thoughts to positive scrutiny and

control your thoughts.

S t e p 9 | 34
Step 9: Control Your Thoughts

“Our good thoughts are sustenance that help us

produce a healthy and productive life, while bad
thoughts become a hindrance to destiny.”

Corinthians 10:5

“We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets

itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take
captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”

1. Do you question your thoughts on a regular basis?

Why?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

2. On a scale of 1 to 5 (with 1 being very negative and 5

being very positive), how would you rate your thought
life?

S t e p 9 | 35
_____________________________________________

1.very negative 3. fairly even 5.very positive

3. After rating yourself, what changes are necessary?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 9 | 36
Step 10 Take Action

S t e p 1 0 | 37
G o after your dreams. So many people sit idly by
and wonder why life doesn’t go the way they
want it to, instead of taking the necessary actions
for things they want and even dream about. Some buy in
to a notion that good and bad, success and failures have
already been predetermined. They’ve become
complacent, taking a spectator approach to their futures.
Life isn’t a puzzle that puts itself perfectly into place. To
have the success we envision and to enjoy the fruit of
our efforts, we must go after our dreams. We must
become serious contenders with a passion to live out our
dreams. Take action!
Will you wholeheartedly go after your dreams or will
you just lazily chase them in your mind?

S t e p 1 0 | 38
Step 10: Take Action

“To have the success we envision, and to enjoy the

fruit of our effort, we must go after our dreams.”

Habakkuk 2:2

And the LORD answered me: “Write the vision; make it

plain on tablets, so he may run who reads it.”

1. Take a few moments to write down what you envision

for your future.

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 1 0 | 39
2. Next, write down five attainable goals that you can
achieve within the next six months to bring yourself
closer to your dreams.

Five attainable goals:

1
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
2
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
3.
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
4.
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
5.
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 1 0 | 40
Step 11 Don’t Give Up

S t e p 1 1 | 41
M
ost of us give up just prior to our
breakthrough. We let problems become
barriers, rather than using them as stepping-
stones. All problems inherently present an opportunity
for solutions. We must learn to meditate on the solutions
instead of the problems, if we want to see the barriers
dissipate. Sometimes in the midst of our problems, we
feel as if we have no choice but to quit. Giving in and
giving up seems to be our only alternative. But we do
have an option.

Gather your problems and use them as lumber,

supplies, and tools for your future, rather than a
weapon against it. Don’t give up!

S t e p 1 1 | 42
Step 11: Don’t Give Up

“All problems inherently present an opportunity for

solutions.”

Romans 8:18

“I consider that our present sufferings are not worth

comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.”

1. Recall a time in your life where you allowed a

problem to become a barrier.
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

2. Now, think about how that problem could have been

used as a stepping-stone and write down your thoughts.
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 1 1 | 43
3. How does the verse above encourage you not to give
up?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 1 1 | 44
Step 12 Broaden Your Perspective

S t e p 1 2 | 45
T
he phrase “nobody understands me” is an equal
opportunity employer. These three words have
come from the mouth of every race, age, gender,
and culture. That’s why “walk a mile in my shoes” is a
well-known quote. This quote is not asking you to be
someone else. It is just suggesting that you broaden your
perspective. In doing so, you will also broaden your
opportunities and your influence. Step out of your shoes
and walk, not a lifetime, but just a mile in someone
else’s shoes.

S t e p 1 2 | 46
Step 12: Broaden Your Perspective

“Step out of your shoes and walk, not a lifetime, but

just a mile in someone else’s shoes.”

Matthew 7:12

“So, whatever you wish that others would do to you, do

also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.”

1. List three people whose lives are different from you

and explain how they differ.

Person 1
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
Person 2
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
Person 3
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 1 2 | 47
2. Make the choice to “walk a mile in their shoes.” What
are some practical ways to do this?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 1 2 | 48
Step 13 Step into Your Destiny

S t e p 1 3 | 49
Y
ears ago, women accounted for a small
percentage of the work force, but in today’s
society, women account for some 47 percent,
according to the Department of Labor Statistics. True,
we enjoy more access and opportunity in the work force,
but it’s also added to our multi-tasking list. We’ve added
employer and employee to our existing roles as mothers,
wives, sisters, friends, and so on. Because of our
nurturing character and a societal demand to make career
second to our other roles, we’ve very often stepped aside
or allowed others to side-step us.

For those wishing to experience a greater

understanding of personal pursuit, it’s time to step
up, step out, and step into your destiny.

S t e p 1 3 | 50
Step 13: Step into Your Destiny

“For those wishing to experience a greater

understanding of personal pursuit, it’s time to step up,
step out, and step into your destiny.”

Habakkuk 2:3

“For still the vision awaits its appointed time; it hastens to

the end—it will not lie. If it seems slow, wait for it; it will
surely come; it will not delay.”

Mark an X by the roles that you play as a woman.

__ Mother __ Wife __ Employee __ Aunt

__ Daughter __ Sister __Ment __ Grandmother

__ Friend __ Employer __Role model __Other

1. Define “participation” in your own words.

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 1 3 | 51
2. How can you participate in growing closer to your
destiny?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 1 3 | 52
Step 14 Step Out of the Box

S t e p 1 4 | 53
W hat would it matter if someone gave you a gift
you could never open? You are a gift to
someone and probably a gift to more than one
someone. But it doesn’t matter how great your gift is if
your box is never opened. It would be a waste to leave a
great gift unopened and unused.
The Greek definition of gift is present. In school, when
the roll was called, you answered the roll call with present
or here. If your gift is not in operation, you are absent.
Don’t hide your gift in a box.
Step out of the box, present yourself and BE
PRESENT!

S t e p 1 4 | 54
Step 14: Step Out of the Box

“If your gift is not in operation, you are absent.”

Matthew 5:14–15

“You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill
cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it
under a basket, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all
who are in the house.”

1. How does this verse speak to you?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. Is your gift currently in operation?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 1 4 | 55
3. If so, how? If not, what is causing you to be absent?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 1 4 | 56
Step 15 Embrace Change

S t e p 1 5 | 57
W
e don’t have to wonder if things will change.
Keep living and you will soon find that they
will. Change is fear-provoking at times, and it
often causes us to hold tightly to what we think
we possess. Although change is inevitable, great change
is optional. We often shrug away from change and hold
on to what’s comfortable or familiar. Familiarity appears
to be comforting. It can be a constant and also feel like
accomplishment but it’s a dangerous place because it has
the power to keep us from greatness. If you want to
experience a great change, you must become involved in
the transaction.

Change is inevitable but great change is optional.

Don’t resist it…embrace it!

S t e p 1 5 | 58
Step 15: Embrace Change

“Although change is inevitable, great change is

optional.”

Deuteronomy 31:6

“Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of

them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He
will not leave you or forsake you.”

1.What does great change look like to you?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. Do you find it easy or difficult to embrace change?

Why?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 1 5 | 59
3. On a scale of 1 to 5 (with 1 being not ready and 5 being
very ready), how ready are you to embrace great change?

|
|
|
|
|

______________________________________________

1 not ready 3 moderately ready 5 very ready

S t e p 1 5 | 60
Step 16 Step Outside the Line

S t e p 1 6 | 61
W
hen we were children in kindergarten we were
taught to color inside the lines, to stand in a
line, and to walk single file in a line. This
practice eliminated chaos and provided order,
but it also created a “line mindset” between us and our
destiny. We became accustomed to living and operating
within the lines, so much so that when someone stepped
out of line, they were sometimes met with harsh
punishment. The lines that were given for our safety and
protection may have done as much to separate us from
our purpose and great opportunity as they did to contain
us and protect us.
There is merit to the lines, and we should respect them.

Even so, be ready to step outside of them when your

dreams demand more space.

S t e p 1 6 | 62
Step 16: Step Outside the Line

“When your dream demands more space, you must

step outside the line.”

James 4:14

“Yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is

your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time
and then vanishes.”

1. Give an example of a “line” in your life that could keep

or has kept you from stepping into your destiny.
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. What opportunity has passed you by because of it?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 1 6 | 63
3. What would stepping outside of this “line” in your life
entail?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 1 6 | 64
Step 17 Keep Score

S t e p 1 7 | 65
I
n sports, our progress is determined by a clock, a
finish line, or by keeping score. However, our
individual progress is determined by self-evaluation.
How do you evaluate your progress? How do you
measure growth? Are you winning or losing? How do you
respond to difficulty? Are you increasing in knowledge
and skill? What does your attitude and actions say to
others? Are you growing?
A good growth plan hinges on an honest evaluation of
performance.

Evaluate yourself regularly. Play to win and have fun

but remember to keep score!

S t e p 1 7 | 66
Step 17: Keep Score

“A good growth plan hinges on an honest evaluation

of performance.”

Romans 8:37
“Yet in all these we are more than conquerors through
Him who loved us.”
1. Do you currently have a scoring system that you
implement in your life?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. Are you winning or losing?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

3. Are you having fun while you are keeping score? If

not, how can you change that?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 1 7 | 67
Step 18 Finish Strong

S t e p 1 8 | 68
S ometimes the struggle is not in starting but in the
finishing. How many of us have started strong only
to fizzle out somewhere in the middle? Why is
that? Could it be a little thing called time? People quit
because it takes too long, it’s too hard, and it’s no fun.
In a nanosecond society, is there time to waste? Marathon
runners, bike riders, even the tortoise and the hare know
the solution: Slow and steady wins the race. Pace
yourself. It’s the key to finishing strong.

Remember, start strong, endure long, and finish

strong.

S t e p 1 8 | 69
Step 18: Finish Strong

“Marathon runners, bike riders, and even the tortoise

and the hare know the solution: Slow and steady wins
the race.”

Philippians 3:14

“I press toward the goal to win the prize for which God
has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”

1. What pace are you running? Is it fast, slow, or steady?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. The first key to change is to identify the problem. What

seems to hold you back from finishing strong?

__ Trying too hard

__ Time (patience)

__ Fear

__ Boredom

S t e p 1 8 | 70
3. How does this verse above encourage or challenge you
to finish strong?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 1 8 | 71
Step 19 Get Back on Track

S t e p 1 9 | 72
S o many have, unknowingly, strayed off the track.
Most are unaware just how far off the track they’ve
gone. Sometimes being off track is masked by one
degree. One degree, however, can cost us just as much as
being off by ten degrees.
Great failure doesn’t take place overnight. Great failure
generally comes from ignoring the one overlooked
degree. The difference between happiness and misery
often comes down to one turn, one pound, one word, or
the error of one degree.

Grab your personal map and your own personal

compass and get back on track.

S t e p 1 9 | 73
Step 19: Get Back on Track

“The difference between happiness and misery often

comes down to one turn, one pound, one word, or the
error of one degree.”

Matthew 7:13

“Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the
way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter
by it are many.”

Take a moment and reflect on your path.

1. Are you on track?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. What does be on track look like in your life?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 1 9 | 74
3. If you are off track, even by the slightest degree, what
action needs to be taken to get back on track?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________

S t e p 1 9 | 75
Step 20 Dream Again

S t e p 2 0 | 76
E
very life begins with a dream. As little girls, we
imagined, we believed, and we dreamed of who we
would become. We were full of possibility and the
sky was the limit. Our innocence knew no limitation.
When asked what we desired to be, ballerina and princess
were usually the top responses. There was no doubt of
happiness. We understood the freedom, excitement, and
the hope behind the dream. We have since stopped
dreaming and lost the hope of our dreams. Dreams
precede hope.

Keep hope alive. Dream again and awaken to a new

you!

S t e p 2 0 | 77
Step 20: Dream Again

“Every life begins with a dream.”

Ephesians 1:18

“Having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may

know what is the hope to which he has called you, what
are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints . . .”

1. With no limitations, who or what do you dream of

becoming?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. Now take a moment to write down a dream that has

come true in your life and use that as fuel to fire the hope
for dreams to come.

_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________

S t e p 2 0 | 78
Step 21 Let Go of the Past

S t e p 2 1 | 79
T
he past is one of the hardest things for us to
release. It can characterize our very being. Letting
go of it is not letting go of who we are. Our past is
not who we are. We’re not defined by our past. Instead,
we’re defined by who we have become because of it. It’s
not what you go through but it’s how you go through.
Each day offers new mercies, new hope, and new
opportunities. If we don’t let go of the past, we’ll miss
“right now” opportunities.

Don’t be defined by a moment or a period of time. Let

go of your past. Yesterday is over and this moment
awaits you!

S t e p 2 1 | 80
Step 21: Let Go of the Past

“It’s not what you go through, but it’s how you go

through.”

Romans 12:2

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed

by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may
discern what is the will of God, what is good and
acceptable and perfect.”

1.Take a moment to reflect on who you have become

because of your past. What comes to mind?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. Have you ever missed out on an opportunity because

you were holding on to the past?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 2 1 | 81
3. Choose today to let go of your past. What are you
going to let go of?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 2 1 | 82
Step 22 Be Friendly

S t e p 2 2 | 83
M
ake it your business to be a friend, not to find a
friend. Be friendly to everyone. It may be
impossible to be friends with everyone you
meet, but it isn’t impossible to be friendly. Being friendly
is an easy task. Friendliness is a quality that impacts both
the giver and the receiver. Be friendly and let someone
know they are valued.

It takes but a moment, costs you nothing, and is worth

a fortune.

S t e p 2 2 | 84
Step 22: Be Friendly
“Make it your business to be a friend, not to find a
friend.”
Proverbs 17:17
“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for
adversity.”
1. On a scale of 1 to 5 (with 1 being not at all friendly and
5 being extremely friendly), how friendly are you?
|
|
|
|
|
______________________________________________
1 not friendly 3 somewhat friendly 5 extremely
friendly
2. List five ways that you can be friendly to those in your
sphere of influence.
1._____________________________________________
2._____________________________________________
3._____________________________________________
4._____________________________________________
5._____________________________________________

S t e p 2 2 | 85
3. How does being friendly to someone show a person
that they are valued?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 2 2 | 86
Step 23 Be Your Best

S t e p 2 3 | 87
T
rue fulfillment isn’t in being the best or being on
top. Fulfillment is found in being your best or
being at the top of your game. In becoming the
person that we know we should be, we often find
ourselves playing the comparison game and competing
with those around us. And yes, at times, we may win, but
we soon discover that being at the top of someone else’s
game puts us at the bottom of ours.

True fulfillment is found when you play your game.

Be your best and win the game.

S t e p 2 3 | 88
Step 23: Be Your Best

“True fulfillment is found when you play your game.”

Proverbs 3:13

“Blessed is the one who finds wisdom, and the one who
gets understanding”

1. How do you know when you are at the top of your

game?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. What brings you fulfillment?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

3. How do you know you are fulfilled?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 2 3 | 89
Step 24 Put Your Best Foot Forward

S t e p 2 4 | 90
A
s women, we love first, and we love hard. We
give our best to others. It’s our natural reaction,
as women, to step aside and give way to our
family and friends. Although it’s noble to step aside, it’s
sometimes more beneficial to step forward. People are
much more likely to heed our steps before they heed our
advice. We cannot lead where we ourselves have not
gone. Taking that first step forward is sometimes the
hardest. Yet it is the most important step to nurturing
those around us. Put your best foot forward and step into
your promise. Stepping forward not only leads us to our
second step, but it leads those who are following us into
their promises as well.

Step forward, follow, and lead.

S t e p 2 4 | 91
Step 24: Put Your Best Foot Forward

“Put your best foot forward and step into your

promise.”

Psalm 37:23

“The steps of a righteous man are ordered by the Lord.”

1. Do you find it easier to step aside or step forward?

Why?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. What does this scripture above say to you about your

steps?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 2 4 | 92
3. Knowing that your steps are ordered, why is it
important to step forward instead of stepping aside?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 2 4 | 93
Step 25 Listen

S t e p 2 5 | 94
T
hrough years of counseling, I discovered that some
of the most helpful and most appropriate advice
was never spoken. The thing that most people long
for is a trusted ear. Way too often we’re too quick to offer
what I call the “advice remedy” to a problem when all
people really need is a place to think out loud...a place
free from advice and opinion. When we listen, we allow
people to find the answer within themselves.
As humans, we have the capability to rationalize and
bring resolve to our problems. Although the advice given
is often good, some of the best answers lie within the
person themselves. But people never get an opportunity to
know that their greatest answers are within them.

Shh…….be quiet! Just listen.

S t e p 2 5 | 95
Step 25: Listen

“When we listen, we allow people to find the answer

within themselves.”

James 1:19

“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone

should be quick to listen, and slow to speak.”

1. On a scale from 1 to 5 (with 1 being lacking and 5

being very good), how good are your listening skills?

|
|
|
|
|

______________________________________________

1 lacking 3 moderately good 5 very good

2. Think of a time when the best answer to your problem

was found within. Did you seek the advice of others
before coming to your conclusion?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 2 5 | 96
3. Is it easier for you to listen or to give advice?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

4. How can you improve your listening skills?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 2 5 | 97
S t e p 2 5 | 98
S t e p 2 5 | 99
Step 26 Look Around

S t e p 2 6 | 100
A
few years ago, a local TV station decided to do a
segment on the evening news to see how
observant their community was to the needs of
others. They posted a sign at one of the local malls. It was
a picture of a little girl. The sign read, “Missing. Have
you seen her?” They sat the little girl about 100 feet from
the sign. A police officer stood another 100 feet farther
away from the little girl. The station reported that she sat
unnoticed for hours.
As sad as this story is, the occurrence is common. There
are many people walking through life with “Missing.
Have you seen ME?” written on their faces and across
their hearts. They’re longing to be noticed. We spend our
time focusing on ourselves and we fail to realize the many
lonely people around us who are living painfully in
obscurity. Some are even in our homes or perhaps sitting
beside us. People just want to be noticed.

Look around and see them.

S t e p 2 6 | 101
Step 26: Look Around

“Those who stop and look around make an impact on

others.”

John 13:34–35

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I

have loved you so you must love one another. By this
everyone will know that you are my disciples if you love
one another.”

1. How does this verse challenge you to look around?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. How often do you focus on yourself and why?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 2 6 | 102
3. Have you ever looked the other way when a friend,
family member, or stranger needed help? If so, what
made you turn away?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 2 6 | 103
Step 27 Don’t Cheat the Process

S t e p 2 7 | 104
T
he main ingredient in success is process. If the
butterfly would have skipped the cocoon, he
wouldn’t have had the strength or the wings to fly.
Our minds are so often fixed on the flying that we miss
the benefits of the journey.
Never assume that just because you can flap your wings,
you’re ready to fly. Success requires strength and
endurance. Be patient! Not only is your strength built
during the process, but your character is built as well.

You will soon fly high if you don’t cheat the process.

S t e p 2 7 | 105
Step 27: Don’t Cheat the Process
“Success requires strength and endurance. Be
patient.”
Romans 12:12
“Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in
prayer.”
1. What processes have you undergone or are you
currently undergoing to “fly”?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
2. How are those processes listed above preparing you to
“fly”?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
3. Have you ever felt as though you were ready to fly,
only to find that your timing was premature? Why?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 2 7 | 106
Step 28 Step Up to the Plate

S t e p 2 8 | 107
M
ost people won’t step up to bat because they are
afraid of missing. But the fact is, if you don’t
swing, you won’t hit. I have determined that I
want to end my day with at least one hit. So, every
morning I wake up swinging. And even though I may
have missed 99 times in a day, there is such a peace in the
one hit that the misses don’t matter. I refuse to be like so
many who have died without a hit. One thing I’ve learned
along the way is that the hits are more memorable than
the misses.

If you don’t swing, you don’t hit! Step up to plate and

swing with gusto.

S t e p 2 8 | 108
Step 28: Step Up to the Plate

“If you don’t swing, you don’t hit!”

1 Timothy 1:7

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power,

and of love and of a sound mind.”

1. Are you so afraid of missing a hit that you don’t swing

at all? Why?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. Record a time in your life when perseverance allowed

you to swing and hit. Did you miss your mark at any
point before you were successful?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 2 8 | 109
3. How do you feel when you know that you have given
your endeavors your all?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 2 8 | 110
Step 29 Get Back Up

S t e p 2 9 | 111
I
recently received a call from my daughter to tell me
that my grandson had taken ten steps on his own. The
previous month, he was pulling himself up to walk
alongside the coffee table and soon after that, he had let
go of the table and gained control of his balance. All
throughout the process, through his ups and downs, my
daughter never mentioned any of his falls.
This is how it is with parents. We never seem to count the
times our babies fall, but we celebrate the times they get
back up. God, who is a heavenly parent, isn’t counting
the times you fall, but counting and celebrating the
number of times you get up.

Get back up…baby steps count, too!

S t e p 2 9 | 112
Step 29: Get Back Up
“God, who is a heavenly parent, isn’t counting the
times you fall, but counting and celebrating the
number of times you get up.”
Galatians 6:9
“And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due
season we will reap, if we do not give up.”

1. In your ups and downs in life, how do you gain

control?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
2. In two sentences, explain what the process is usually
like, good or bad.
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
3. Do you find yourself celebrating your successes or
focusing on your failures?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 2 9 | 113
4.. List three ways that you will celebrate your future
successful moments.

______________________________________________
1.

______________________________________________
2.

_____________________________________________
3.

S t e p 2 9 | 114
Step 30 Don’t Procrastinate

S t e p 3 0 | 115
T
oday’s alarm clocks come with a snooze button.
There’s even a “snooze” feature on cell phones!
According to statistics, over 80 percent of people
hit the snooze button, and at least 60 percent hit it more
than once. The result is a society filled with time-pressed,
unfulfilled people who have hit the snooze button far too
many times. People waste their days by milking just a few
more minutes, just one more hour, or just one more day as
if they can magically catch up or even get ahead.
Unwittingly, they’ve also hit the mental snooze button on
being happy, while reciting procrastinating words like
“when I finish school, when I get more money, when I
lose weight, when my kids are grown,” and the list goes
on. Stop filling tomorrow with unmet deadlines.

Stop procrastinating. When is now? Go after your

dreams.

S t e p 3 0 | 116
Step 30: Don’t Procrastinate

“Stop filling tomorrow with unmet deadlines.”

Colossians 3:23

“Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not
for men “

1. On a scale of 1 to 5 (with 1 being often and 5 being

very rarely), how often do you procrastinate?

|
|
|
|
|

______________________________________________

1. often 3. now and then 5. very rarely

2. What have you lost due to procrastination in your life?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 0 | 117
3. What are some tactics that you can implement to stop
procrastinating?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 0 | 118
Step 31 Fight Like a Girl

S t e p 3 1 | 119
T
his is a man’s world! Have you ever heard that?
Many have and many believed it was so. We have
laid down femininity for the sake of surviving,
even competing. We have squared our shoulders, stuck
out our chests, and put up our dukes. But because we’ve
had to stand strong and firm, we’ve lost our soft side. We
have been fighting like men but we’re not really winning
the battle. We were created to love and to nurture. Instead
of a cold, hardened armor, our covering is vulnerability,
flexibility, and tears. Our fight is soft and gentle. Women
are strongest at being women.

Fight like a girl…with sugar and spice and everything

nice.

S t e p 3 1 | 120
Step 31: Fight Like a Girl

“Women are strongest at being women.”

Psalm 27:14

“Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take
courage; wait for the Lord!”

1. Has your fight become hardened like that of a man, or

is it soft and feminine?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. Recall an example in your personal life where fighting

like a man did not work in your favor.

_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________

S t e p 3 1 | 121
3. When was the last time you embraced your feminine
strengths and fought like a girl?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 1 | 122
Step 32 Pick Your Battles

S t e p 3 2 | 123
W e do not live in a battle-free world. My mother
always told me: “Pick your battles.” It wasn’t
until I was older that I realized what she was
really saying. I now understand that better. Some battles
aren’t a win even if you win. You can win the argument
and lose your friend. Some battles just aren’t worth the
win.
Whether your battles are a matter of principle or even a
monetary loss, you should learn to be picky about the
energy you exert to fight a battle. One of the greatest
lessons my mother ever taught me was this one: It was
sound advice then, and its sound advice now.

Learn to pick your battles because sometimes victory

is possible without full-on engagement.

S t e p 3 2 | 124
Step 32: Pick Your Battle

“Learn to pick your battles because sometimes victory

is possible without full-on engagement.”

2 Chronicles 20:15

He said: “Listen, King Jehoshaphat and all who live in

Judah and Jerusalem! This is what the Lord says to you:
‘do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast
army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s.’”

1. How does this verse challenge you in your battles?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. Recall a time where you won a battle but lost so much

more. Was your victory worth the cost?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 2 | 125
3. How can you choose your battles more wisely in the
future?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 2 | 126
Step 33 Stay Centered

S t e p 3 3 | 127
G olf pros are taught that in order for them to have a
good game, they must strengthen their core. Core
training is for muscles in the lower back, hips,
abdomen, and pelvic area to work in harmony. This leads
to better balance, stability, and posture…all necessary for
a good swing.
Have you ever felt as though you lost your swing? Have
things felt a little off center? Being and staying centered
is very important and not just for a golfer. Our “center” is
where our core values are. Our growth in character comes
from our center. This particular center is our production
center. It contains the seeds of creativity as well as the
mental stamina for making the right swings in life.
Strengthen your physical, mental, and spiritual core.

Stay centered and you’ll have a strong and sharp

swing in no time.

S t e p 3 3 | 128
Step 33: Stay Centered

“Our ‘center’ is where our core values are. Our

growth in character comes from our center.”

Proverbs 19:1

“Better is a poor person who walks in his integrity than

one who is crooked in speech and is a fool.”

1. What keeps you centered?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. Just as the golfer exercises to keep his core strong, how

are you strengthening your physical, mental, and spiritual
core to stay centered?
Physical:
______________________________________________
Mental:
______________________________________________
Spiritual:
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 3 | 129
3. How do you think that strengthening your physical,
mental, and spiritual core will aid in your growth in
character?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 3 | 130
Step 34 Be Flexible

S t e p 3 4 | 131
H
ave you ever considered the strength of a palm
tree? The palm tree is subjected to typhoons and
hurricane winds. Regardless of the strength of the
wind, the strength of the palm tree is more amazing. The
palm tree will bend, even almost in half, but it doesn’t
break. Most other trees are broken, uprooted, and blown
away in bad storms. They are severely damaged simply
because they are not flexible. The palm tree’s strength
and ability to endure is its flexibility. The tree can bend
all the way to the ground and when the storm is over, it
straightens up and is actually stronger. Flexibility will not
only keep you from breaking down in trials and upset, it
also builds the strength needed to endure.

Be flexible!

S t e p 3 4 | 132
Step 34: Be Flexible

“Flexibility will not only keep you from breaking

down in trials and upsets, it also builds the strength
needed to endure.”
1 Peter 3:15
“But in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always
being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you
for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with
gentleness and respect . . .”
1. Are you flexible in trying situations, or are you
immoveable? Have you always been this way or is your
reaction a newly learned behavior?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
2. Just as the palm tree bends but does not break in a
storm, do trials and upsets make you stronger afterwards?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 4 | 133
3. What steps can you take to become more flexible when
trials and upsets come your way?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 4 | 134
Step 35 Don’t Be Fear-Driven

S t e p 3 5 | 135
A
lady shared her story of traveling home, alone,
late one night and noticed a car following closely
behind her. She was immediately gripped with
fear. As she turned into her subdivision, she looked at her
rearview mirror and the car was still behind her. She
thought, “I live alone. It isn’t safe to go home.”
She decided to take a detour away from her home. She
made a left instead of a right. The car was still behind her.
She made a right and yet the car continued to follow her.
Panicked, she pulled into a driveway of a well-lit house.
She jumped out of her car and began to beat on the front
door. An elderly lady answered, and the frantic woman
began to tell her that she was being followed. As she was
telling her story the car that had been following her pulled
into the driveway and parked behind her car. She yelled
out, “There he is! There he is!”
The elderly woman said, “Where?”
The frightened woman said, “Lady, he’s right there! Right
there.”
Sensing her panic, the elderly woman calmed her and
quietly assured her with the words, “Ma’am, that’s my
son.”
Fear had seized the lady and led her in the direction of the
very thing she feared.

Don’t allow fear to climb into the driver’s seat!

S t e p 3 5 | 136
Step 35: Don’t Be Fear-Driven

“Put fear in the back seat and you are sure to reach
your destination.”

Psalm 23:4

“Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will

fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.”

1. Even in your darkest hour, God is with you. How does

this verse encourage you not to fear?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. Are you naturally prone to fear or does faith and

courage come easy to you? Why?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 5 | 137
3. What are some tactics that you can implement to
overcome your fears daily? List three active steps that
you can take now to become fearless.

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

4. What inspires you to be full of faith?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 5 | 138
Step 36 Stay Within Your Jurisdiction

S t e p 3 6 | 139
A
uthority is within you. Every person on earth has
a personal authority that enables them to fulfill
their purpose. However, personal authority is
limited to personal jurisdiction.
One day as I was speeding down the highway, I spotted a
police officer, causing me to immediately reduce my
speed by a quick tap to my brake. As he got closer, I
discovered that he was from a different county and had no
authority to ticket me for speeding. Neither did he have
authority to make an arrest. Why? He was outside of his
jurisdiction. To make an arrest, he needed to call for
assistance from an officer in the jurisdiction.
We’re often frustrated by our inability to conquer and
move forward. Your purpose, power, and authority are
assigned to a place or “jurisdiction.”

Find and stay within your jurisdiction and you will

fulfill your purpose.

S t e p 3 6 | 140
Step 36: Stay Within Your Jurisdiction
“Your purpose, power, and authority are assigned to a
place or ‘jurisdiction.’”
Romans 13:1
“Let every person be subject to the governing authorities.
For there is no authority except from God, and those that
exist have been instituted by God.”
1. List at least five areas in your life where you have
“jurisdiction.”
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. Have you ever found yourself trying to work outside of

your jurisdiction? If so, recall the outcome of that
situation.
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 6 | 141
3. In what ways are staying within your own jurisdiction
beneficial to you and to those around you?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 6 | 142
Step 37 Follow Instructions

S t e p 3 7 | 143
F
ollowing instructions is one of the first things we
learn in school. It would seem to be a simple task.
Yet very few people follow instructions. They’re
most often ignored because most think they can “wing it.”
They usually find themselves stuck in a hard spot because
they didn’t follow the directions.
Do you know someone who ignores the printed
instructions when assembling an object? They always
seem to end the process with extra parts and hardware left
over. It would seem their concern is more about the object
merely getting assembled and not as much for getting
assembled correctly.
It’s the same concern with life. If we aren’t doing the
right things or striving lawfully, we’ll find ourselves
moving toward our dreams with only half of a success
strategy. In other words, we’ll have just enough assembly
to look put-together but we’ll be unreliable because we
left some necessary components out of the process.

Forsake shortcuts. Follow instruction

S t e p 3 7 | 144
Step 37: Follow Instructions

“If we aren’t doing the right things or striving

lawfully, we’ll find ourselves moving toward our
dreams with only half of a success strategy.”
Proverbs 16:3
“Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be
established.”
1. On a scale of 1 to 5 (with 1 being very easy and 5 being
very difficult), how easy is it for you to follow
instructions?
|
|
|
|
|
______________________________________________
1 very easy 3 somewhat easy 5 very difficult
2. Describe, in your own words, the importance of being
fully assembled in your personal life.
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 7 | 145
3. Are there areas of your life where more assembly and
attention to instructions are required? Explain.

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 7 | 146
Step 38 Get in Where You Fit

S t e p 3 8 | 147
I
grew up in what society would call a dysfunctional
home. My parents divorced when I was two years old.
I was one of two girls in a house of ten children. I
had so many challenges in my childhood.
While growing up, I did what many people often do. I
bounced from one place to another, one relationship to
another, and one job to another looking for my purpose
and a place to fit. There were places and situations that I
was able to squeeze into, but they weren’t comfortable,
nor were they a perfect fit.
Our purpose is designed to fit us perfectly. It is a
comfortable fit. The wrong fit will cause you to become
calloused and bitter. It will also cause stress and anxiety.
Don’t force it! If you have to force yourself into it, it’s
not your fit.

Get in where you fit in!

S t e p 3 8 | 148
Step 38: Get in Where You Fit In

“Your purpose is designed to fit you perfectly.”

Romans 8:28

“And we know that in all things God works for the good
of those who love him, who have been called according to
his purpose.”

1. How does this verse encourage you?

______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

2. The perfect fit is a comfortable fit, but the wrong fit

will cause you to become calloused and bitter. Are you
currently in your perfect fit?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
3. If not, how can you ease your way into your perfect fit?
If so, how did you find your perfect fit?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 8 | 149
Step 39 Create a Path

S t e p 3 9 | 150
M any of us know the “what” but not the “where,”
the “where” but not the “what,” the “when” but
not the “how.” Sometimes, in pursuit of our
purpose, we are left without answers and because we
can’t see a clear path before us, we stop. So many people
stop short of their destiny. They have built houses, raised
kids, worked in careers, and unfortunately, died in the
middle of the path at the halfway point. They became
complacent.
It’s okay to rest and regain strength, but God forbid we
become satisfied and live at the halfway point. When
there are no answers and the road feels like a dead-end,
move off of it. Resist apathy. Resist settling for “good
enough.”

Create a path and journey on!

S t e p 3 9 | 151
Step 39: Create a Path

“It’s okay to rest and regain strength, but God forbid

we become satisfied and live at the halfway point.”

Mark 6:31
“And he said to them, “Come away by yourselves to a
desolate place and rest a while.”
1. Are you at a halfway point? Explain.
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
2. It is easy to become settled and comfortable with
“good enough,” but your purpose requires more of you.
What path is your purpose leading you to?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 3 9 | 152
S t e p 3 9 | 153
S t e p 3 9 | 154
Step 40 Check Your Rear View Mirror

S t e p 4 0 | 155
N ever forget where you came from. I’m not asking
you to turn back. I am suggesting that
occasionally, you look up and glance in the rear-
view mirror. In doing so, you will keep tabs on how far
you’ve come, see the unexpected things coming alongside
you, and know when to change lanes. So many times,
we’re so focused and driven that we forget where we’ve
come from and how far we’ve come.

Checking the rear view (or remembering our humble

start) helps to pave our way to a healthy, grounded
future.

S t e p 4 0 | 156
Step 40: Check Your Rear-View Mirror
“Checking the rear-view (or remembering our humble
start) helps to pave our way to a healthy, grounded
future.”
Psalm 143:5
“I remember yesterday. I look back at all your works and
consider what your hands have done.”
1. Take a few moments to remember where you came
from. Write down any instances that stand out as being
character-building or life-changing moments.
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
2. How far have you come? What has led you to where
you are today?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 4 0 | 157
3. How does remembering your humble beginning pave
your way to a healthy and grounded future?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 4 0 | 158
Step 41 Crawl, Walk, and Run

S t e p 4 1 | 159
L
ife today is about quick progression. We have
become a microwave, drive-thru, and quick-fix
society, but a healthy growth process takes time
and has an order to it.
My grandmother told me “You have to crawl before you
can walk.” It doesn’t seem as if anyone’s interested in
crawling anymore. We just want to hit the ground
running. Even so, to everything in life, there is a season
and a process. A new life requires a gestation period. A
seed requires a germinating period. Between starting and
finishing there is an in-between.
As I stated, my grandmother said we must crawl before
we can walk. I would like to add to her words…. Don’t be
discouraged when it seems like you’re crawling.

But don’t become satisfied with walking when you see

a chance to run!

S t e p 4 1 | 160
Step 41: Crawl, Walk, and Run
“We have become a microwave, drive-thru, and
quick-fix society, but a healthy growth process takes
time and has an order to it.”
2 Peter 3:18
“But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and
Savior Jesus Christ.”
1. What stage of life are you in right now? Are you
crawling, walking, or running?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
2. What is your outlook on your current stage of life? Are
you discouraged, comfortable, or eager? Explain.
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
3. A healthy growth process takes time. How can you
prepare yourself for the current stage you are in, as well
as the next stage that you will embark upon?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 4 1 | 161
Step 42 Stay in the Game

S t e p 4 2 | 162
I
t is very easy to run away when things are not going
our way. When we were kids, we would just take our
toys and go home. If it was our ball, it was also our
way or the highway. Unfortunately, life is a mix of
winning and losing. We learn greater lessons in losing
than we will in winning. How we lose says far more about
us than success ever will. I’m not sure victory would even
be as sweet without the agony of defeat.
Losing well is winning! If you leave the game, it
prevents you from losing but it also keeps you from
learning and winning. We win some. We lose some. But
it’s impossible to win a game you don’t play.

S t e p 4 2 | 163
Step 42: Stay in the Game
“If you leave the game, it prevents you from losing,
but it also keeps you from learning and winning.”
1 Corinthians 16:57
“But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through
our Lord Jesus Christ.”
1. Have you ever found yourself forfeiting the game of
life when it got tough? Explain.
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
2. When you experience a defeat, what can be said about
your character?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
3. What lessons have you learned by staying in the game?
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________
______________________________________________

S t e p 4 2 | 164
Step 43 Play Well With Others

S t e p 4 3 | 165
W hen I was a student, we were not only graded
for our academics but also for how well we
played with others. Our social skills were just
as important as our performance. In today’s world, we
have learned to perform well but we haven’t learned how
to relate to those around us as well. Social skills are
lacking. We have forgotten the importance of kindness,
working together, and sharing with others. Solitaire is a
game one plays alone. But life is not to be lived or
played alone.

If we desire true wealth, we must hone our social

skills and learn to play well with others.

S t e p 4 3 | 166
Step 43: Play Well with Others
“Life is not to be lived or played alone.”
Hebrews 13:16
“Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have,
for such sacrifices are pleasing to God.”
1. What are your social skills like?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
2. Do you need to work on interacting with others?
Explain.
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
3. What is the importance of kindness, working together,
and sharing with others?
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________
_______________________________________________

S t e p 4 3 | 167
Step 44 Hold the Door Open

S t e p 4 4 | 168
I
think it’s safe to say that most people have been
taught to hold the door open for the person behind
them as they walk through a door. Have you ever had
a door slammed in your face? It is offensive. Holding the
door open is a nice gesture, not only literally, but
figuratively.
If you have moved forward or been promoted, be
considerate. Remember how hard it was for you to get to
the level you have reached and do what you can to make
it a little easier for the next woman trying to follow in
your footsteps.

Hold the door open for those who are coming in after
you.

S t e p 4 4 | 169
Step 44: Hold the Door Open

“If you have moved forward or been promoted, be

considerate.”

Philippians 2:4

“Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but
also to the interests of others.”

1. How does this scripture encourage you to hold the

door open for others?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

2. Recall an instance when you were helped by someone

who was ahead of you in life.

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 4 4 | 170
3. Describe how you can hold a figurative door open for
someone who is following behind you

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 4 4 | 171
Step 45 Connect the Dots

S t e p 4 5 | 172
L
ife has caused us to move from dot to dot,
situation to situation, and place to place. If you’re
anything like me, you’ve had times where you felt
like you were all over the place and everything was
a mess. Nothing seemed to make sense. In a connect-the-
dot puzzle, the picture isn’t obvious until you connect
the dots. The dots are just spots, making no sense until
we connect them.

Don’t judge the picture of your life until all the dots
have been connected.

S t e p 4 5 | 173
Step 45: Connect the Dots

“Don’t judge the picture of your life until all the dots
have been connected.”

Deuteronomy 4:29

“But from there you will seek the Lord your God and
you will find him, if you search after him with all your
heart and with all your soul.”

1. Do you feel like situations have left you feeling as

though your life is a disconnected picture of dots?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

2. Do you find yourself judging the unfinished

circumstances of your life, or are you patiently waiting
to make the connections?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 4 5 | 174
3. Stepping back, are you able to make any connections
that will help you complete what the picture of your life
will be? If so, what are those connections?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
____________________________________________

S t e p 4 5 | 175
Step 46 Gather the Fragments

S t e p 4 6 | 176
M
y husband’s grandmother wasn’t a wasteful
woman. I personally considered her a pack rat.
She would gather and cut the family’s old
clothes and put them in bags. What I didn’t understand is
that she intentionally gathered the pieces. She wasn’t a
pack rat after all.
Have you ever had your life shattered? Either something
happened or someone did something that seemed to tear
you apart until you felt like all you had left were scraps
of dignity or a heart broken in pieces. My husband’s
grandma had a bag full of worthless scraps until she
gathered them to make beautiful quilts. Take those
scraps of dignity, those pieces of your broken heart,
and gather the fragments and make a beautiful
covering of goodness for yourself and those around
you.

S t e p 4 6 | 177
Step 46: Gather the Fragments

“True wisdom lies in gathering the precious things

out of each day as it goes by.”

Isaiah 43:19

“Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth,

do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the
wilderness and rivers in the desert.”

1. Have you ever had your life shattered? If so, explain.

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

2. What pieces have been left behind?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 4 6 | 178
3. What beautiful masterpiece can you make with the
remnants of your dignity and broken heart?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 4 6 | 179
Step 47 Spend Your Time Wisely

S t e p 4 7 | 180
L
adies love to hang out. We call it our “girlfriend”
time. We really look forward to spending time
and sharing our stories with one another, sad or
funny. The importance of time is how it’s spent! Time
spent is also like money spent. It’s gone! But, just like
money, it can also be invested. We must be just as
conscientious about our time as we are about money.
The inequality of comparing the two is that we can make
more money, but we can’t make more time. I decided to
become as proactive about how I spend my time as I am
about stretching my money for a maximum return. Time
is precious and once it’s spent; it is not recoverable.

Invest your time. It lives forever, yields a return, and

builds great relationships.

S t e p 4 7 | 181
Step 47: Spend Your Time Wisely

“Invest your time. It lives forever, yields a return,

and builds great relationships.”

Ephesians 5:15–16

“Look carefully then how you walk, not as the unwise

but the wise, making the best use of time, because the
days are evil.”

1. How does this scripture encourage you to make good

use of your time?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

2. Are you proactive about how you spend your time?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 4 7 | 182
3. Make a list of at least five things that are good
investments of your time.
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 4 7 | 183
Step 48 Live on the Offense, not Defense

S t e p 4 8 | 184
W e’ve somehow ended up on the wrong side of
success. Too much of our day includes fixing,
repairing, and restoration. We have become
more re-active than active. We’re trying to get our
health back, our marriages back, our money back, our
lives back…and the list goes on.
We joined the defensive team and have become
proficient at “guarding.” We long since learned how to
keep the other team from scoring. We’re completely
focused on the ticking clock but let’s not use our
energies merely on defensive maneuvers and forget
about scoring points.

Play defense but live on the offense!

S t e p 4 8 | 185
Step 48: Live on the Offense, not Defense

“Play defense but live on the offense!”

Peter 5:8

“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil

prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to
devour.”

1. In your daily life, have you become proficient at

guarding instead of scoring? If so, how?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

2. ready for whatever comes your way

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 4 8 | 186
3. What does scoring points look like in your life?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 4 8 | 187
Step 49 Make It Your Own

S t e p 4 9 | 188
M
ost of us have eaten a meal at a friend’s home,
perhaps even a simple meatloaf dinner, but
there was something different about the
meatloaf. It wasn’t just good; it was great!
You asked for the recipe, and you may have gotten “a
family secret” reply. Your friend took an average
meatloaf and made it her own simply by changing the
recipe and adding or eliminating a particular ingredient.
Everything we know today has an origin and came from
someone or somewhere else. What you add or subtract
from your lifelong teaching is what makes it yours.
Don’t settle for someone else’s recipe for your life.

Be yourself and make it your own.

S t e p 4 9 | 189
Step 49: Make It Your Own

“What you add or subtract from your lifelong

teaching is what makes it yours.”

Peter 4:10

“Each of you should use whatever gift you have received

to serve others…”
1. Recall one of your favorite lessons that you have
learned from someone in your life.
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
2. How have you made that lesson your own?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
3. Did you add or subtract from it? How so?
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 4 9 | 190
Step 50 Control Your Emotions

S t e p 5 0 | 191
B
eing emotional is a good thing. Emotion allows
us to express ourselves with passion.
It lets others know when we’re happy, grateful,
sad, or disappointed. Emotion says, “I am human, and I
relate to the world’s humanity.”
Having said that, as beautiful as emotion can be, it can
become ugly and disastrous when not controlled. In fact,
a person without control of their emotions is as
defenseless as a city without a stable and reliable defense
system. We must know when to display them and when
to delay them. When we don’t control our emotions,
they control us and work against us. If we don’t learn to
control our emotions, we put our relationships, money,
dreams, and even our health at great risk. Don’t try to
control others.

Learn to control your emotions!

S t e p 5 0 | 192
Step 50: Control Your Emotions

“If we don’t learn to control our emotions, we put

our relationships, money, dreams, and even our
health at great risk.”

Philippians 4:6–7

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by

prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your
requests be made known to God. And the peace of God,
which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts
and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

1. Recall a time when you did not control your emotions.

What were the consequences?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

2. We must know when to display our emotions and

when to delay them. How can you make that distinction
in your life?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 5 0 | 193
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

3. Describe how your relationships, money, dreams, and

health are at risk when your emotions are not controlled.

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 5 0 | 194
Step 51 Dress Nicely…Always

S t e p 5 1 | 195
W hether you know it or not, your clothes speak
on your behalf, and they determine your level
of confidence. Have you ever decided to just
throw on something and run to the store? It never fails,
that was the day you ran into someone you knew. And
because you weren’t dressed properly, you decided to
avoid them, moving carefully from one isle to the other.
You weren’t confident enough in your appearance to
even be friendly.
Just as that one occasion kept you from being cordial,
you would be surprised to know your clothes also dictate
your behavior. High heels dictate a more lady-like gait,
while tennis shoes afford an athletic ease. Looking our
best promotes self-esteem and attracts respect.

Dress nice…always!

S t e p 5 1 | 196
Step 51: Dress Nicely . . . Always

“Looking our best promotes self-esteem and attracts

respect.”

Timothy 2:9–10

“Women should adorn themselves in respectable

apparel, with modesty and self-control . . . with what is
proper for women who profess godliness—with good
works.”

1. On a scale of 1 to 5 (with 1 being rarely and 5 being

always), how often do you dress nicely?

_____________________________________________

1 rarely 3 sometimes 5 always

S t e p 5 1 | 197
2. How do you feel when you dress nicely, as opposed
to just throwing on something?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

3. Why is it important to always dress nicely?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 5 1 | 198
STEP 52 Say, “I’m Sorry”

S t e p 5 2 | 199
A
ccording to Elton John, “Sorry” seems to be the
hardest word.” Each of us has hurt or offended
someone and instead of simply saying, “I’m
sorry,” we made a weak pseudo-apology or excuse for
our behavior. We’re so quick to offer apologies which
fault our humanity, but we struggle with genuine words
of apology. “I’m sorry” is what we all long to hear, but it
is sometimes the hardest to say. And when it is said, it is
often accompanied by, the word but. Whenever we add
the word but, we aren’t truly apologizing, we are shifting
the responsibility from ourselves to the other person. If
you feel like you weren’t wrong in your action,
apologize for the pain it may have caused. Yes, you may
lose your pride, but you will save a relationship.

Take responsibility and say, “I’m sorry.” It goes

along way.

S t e p 5 2 | 200
Step 52: Say, “I’m Sorry”

“Apologize when you should, when others can’t, and

when they won’t.”

Matthew 5:23–24

“Therefore, if you are offering a gift at the altar and there

remember that your brother or sister has something
against you, leave your gift in front of the altar. First go
and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your
gift.”

1. How does this verjse challenge you to make peace and

say, “I’m sorry”?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

2. When you apologize, do you add a “but” or an excuse

for your behavior along with it? If so, why?

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 5 2 | 201
3. Make every effort to apologize without adding a “but”
or an excuse and choose to save the relationship instead.
List any relationships below that need to be mended and
make time to follow through.

_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________

S t e p 5 2 | 202
S t e p 5 2 | 203
S t e p 5 2 | 204
 oh-what-the-heel-cover.pdf 2 8/14/22 9:22 PM

  


     
   

           

 

­ €‚ƒ„€‚ƒ…
     
     †  
   ‡    

  
ˆ‰Š‹Œ
 

Ž€†
 †     †    †   
‡  †
† 
C 
M
Ž         ‘ ’
Y
† ƒ†    ‚   †
   
CM
           
  Ž† 
MY

  † “
CY

CMY

Oh!
K

What the

HEEL
52 WAYS TO STEP OUT OF A RUT
WEEKLY DEVOTIONAL