BDB1263/KMC2253 BUSINESS COMMUNICATION

Topic 4: Email Etiquette

Tutorial Exercises
1. In each of these pairs, choose the SMART subject line:
1 (a) Results for first quarter of 2022
(b) Quarterly results up by 20%

2 (a) Reservation
(b) Reservation of Juniper Suite

3 (a) Order ST 678R 24 August

(b) Problem with our order

4 (a) Party invitation to all staff

(b) Invitation to 10th anniversary party

5 (a) Sales Manager Advertisement

(b) Advertisement needed urgently

6 (a) Report on staff canteen

(b) Report attached

7 (a) Overseas trip November 2022

(b) November 2022 Trip to Europe

8 (a) 10% pay increase for all employees

(b) Directors reject 10% pay increase

2. Place a tick or a cross beside each of these expressions,

showing whether they are examples of (✗) old-fashioned
writing style or (✓) modern business writing suitable for use in
emails. Rewrite those that you gave a cross.
(a) Please find attached hereto the documents as per your
request.
(b) Please advise me if you concur with this opinion.
(c) I hope to hear from you soon.
(d) Should you require any further clarification please contact
the undersigned.
 (e) Thank you for your message today.
(f) Please be informed that a departmental meeting will be
held next Monday.
(g) Please give me a call on 2874722 if you have any questions.
(h) I am writing to inform you that the annual dinner will be
held on 12 November.
(i) The above-mentioned goods will be despatched to you
soonest possible.
(j) I am enclosing herewith our remittance in settlement of
your account.
(k) Kindly contact me as soon as possible to discuss this
matter.
(l) I was pleased to hear about your recent promotion.
(m) I am very sorry to hear about the mistake made with your
order.
(n) I am putting in the mail today our latest catalogue for your
reference and perusal.
(o) Please note that arrangements have been made for a
repeat order to be despatched to you immediately.

3. Study this effective email and then draft a reply. Make up any
necessary details.
From georgiathomas@aurorasuperstores.co.uk
Date 10/7/22 11:35:14
To lilymcbeal@healthylife.com
CC richardcage@aurorasuperstores.co.uk
Subject Eating for Health Campaign
Dear Lily

It was good to meet you again last week. As discussed, I

would like to invite you to give the opening speech at the
launch of our Healthy Eating Campaign. This will be held at
our Leeds superstore on Monday 8 August.
 Richard and I are very excited about this campaign. We are
hoping it will make the public more aware of the importance
of choosing a variety of fresh fruit and vegetables as part of
their daily diet.

I am attaching a provisional programme, from which you will

see that 10 minutes has been allocated for the opening
speech at 9.30 am. We will be happy to arrange your
transport to and from our superstore on launch day.

I know that your profile in this industry would bring crowds

flocking to this launch. We hope you will decide to join us.

Best wishes

Georgia Thomas
Marketing Manager
Aurora Superstores Ltd
Telephone +44 114 2888724
Mobile +44 7770 2342342
www.aurora.com

4. Here is an email that has been written quickly and in a tone

that is far from courteous.
From grace.peng@global.co.cn
Date 25/10/22 15:29:45
To robinzhang@midway.co.cn
CC
Subject Your Complaint
Your complaint about your printer that you bought from us
last year has been past to me for my attn. Please be
informed that your policy document shows that you only
have a one year guarantee for these products and it ran out
on 2nd Sept. So if you want it fixing you will have to pay for
it.

Let me know what you want to do.

Rewrite the email in a more appropriate tone.
5. Discuss what’s wrong with this email, and rewrite it more
appropriately.
From EdwardLeong@bettabuy.co.my
Date 9/9/22 14:20:31
To roger.hardy@stcommunications.co.my
CC
Subject Complaint with order
Dear Hardy
We placed the above-mentioned order for 150 CDs on
8/4/22 and it was received by us yesterday. I was shocked
to find that 24 of them were badly scratched.

The package containing the goods was in perfect condition

and I accepted and signed for the delivery without question,
but it was only when I unpack and check the discs that I
discovered the damage.

Attached hereto you will find a list of the damaged CDs and
should be grateful if you would replace them as soon as
possible.

Hoping to hear from you soonest.

Tnks & Rgs

Reply to the previous message. Make up the necessary details
as you consider appropriate.