Cheech Chong

The year is 1976. Cheech and Chong were sitting in their house debating wether or not to do
the extra-terrestrial reefer seeds that they had somehow gotten their hands on. “Hey man I don’t
know about this, those seeds look pretty funky.”Maaaaan you worry about things too much, plus
were almost out and you know nobody in this town sells good shit.””Yeah yeah you’re right but
its your fault if this shit goes haywire and takes over the planet.””Whatever man, all that pot is
making you paranoid.” So Cheech and Chong planted their alien ganja and patiently awaited its
growth. After a few weeks of nuturring the plant it began to flower. Soon you could see sizable
purple buds covering the entire plant. One night, about a month after the plant had began to
flower, Cheech had a horrible case of the munchies, so he decided to go downstairs and make
sandwiches to cure his terrible ailment. Cheech had just finished aking his sandwhiches when
he heard a week voice, he tried to convince himself that it was infact the reefer and it was just
making him paranoid but then he heard it again. Terrified, he ran upstairs to get Chong. “Hey
man I think this house is haunted or something I heard someone talking to me downstairs!!””Nah
man you’re trippin just go back to bed” Despite not believing him at all Chong went downstairs,
partially to make sure no one was there but he mostly did it to shut Cheech up. “See man no
one’s downhere just go back to bed and quit bothering me.””Wait just give it a second man I
swear I’m not making this up” As soon as Cheech had finished speaking they heard the voice
again. It was asking them for food. Confused they started to asking questions. As the voice
continued talking they relised that it was coming from the plant. Once they had finished
speaking to the plant, whom called himself herb, they sat there in shock relizing what they must
do.”I don’t wanna kill nobody man but what are we going to do” ”Hey man its fine well just go
pick up some nobody off the streets or something cmon lets go get this over with.” Nervously
Cheech and Chong set off, they had no idea what they were doing, but they knew they had to
come back with some kind of food for herb. Not long after they had begun driving they started to
see a sign for a gentlemens club when a brilliant idea dawned on the both of them.”Hey man I
got a pretty good idea man. What if we just rented out one of those girls and took her home with
us””Hey man thats not a bad idea. So Cheech and Chong pulled over and entered the men’s
club they set eyes on the magnificent Woodpecker Wendy. Now Woodpekcer Wendy wasn’t
your average grande horizontale, this beautiful gem from The City of Angles was strapped to a
state of the art bedrest table complete with hydraulics similar to that of a lowrider vehicle. Once
Cheech and Chong had acquired this working woman they encountered a problem, her bredrest
table didnt fit in the car, so being naturally quick thinkers they decided to strap her onto the top
of the car, but in their rush to get her attached and get out of their they did a very poor job of
actually attaching her to the car so once the duo had started to pick up speed Woodpecker
Wendy flew off of the roof of the car, much like the majestic Woodpecker. Once the two had
relised the terrine accident that had just occured they immediatly put it in reverse and went back
to get her. Once this duo had gotten back their beloved feed they made sure to adequatley tie
her on to the car. After all was said and done they hurried back home and began the long
process of dismermberment. Once they had finished preparing the plants feed they entered the
living room where this monstrous reefer lant sat patiently awaiting his magnificient feast.
Cheech and Chong chucked Woodpecker Wendy’s mangled remains at the plant and ran
upstairs not wanting to face the foul deed that they had done. Once upstairs they began to hear
the plant ripping apart the poor woman they could hear the tearing of the sinue and the cracking
of her bones they sat in silence disgusted by what they had done, Cheech began to cry “I told
you man we should’ve just left those seeds alone. What are we going to do, what if someone
calls the cops” Chong sat there in silence, they both did until they heard voice coming from
downstairs, they both got up and shakily walked down stairs expcting to see something out of a
horror movie, but there was nothing except for the plant and their furniture. “Thank you boys that
was quite the feast. I have a gift for you, for all of your hard work.” The plant then present them
with the ickiest stickiest mary jane the duo had ever seen. Not knowing what else to do the
began to roll up. Chong quickly went to work and soon a gorilla finger sat in front of them just
begging to be smoked. As soon as the first toke was taken the pair passed out, falling on the
ground. They woke up to a pounding on the door. “Police open up we know you have Miss
Wendy in there!!” They looked around shocked dismembered body parts and blood covered the
entire first floor. After futher inspection they noticed that the plant was gone and came to the gut
wrenching relization that they had fallen victim to REEFER MADNESS.