That Uptight Man (COMPLETED)

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That Uptight Man
--
Prologue
"SIGE NA, GABBIE?" I pleaded together with my pouty lips and puppy eyes. Kanina ko
pa siya pinipilit pero kahit ano'ng gawin ko, talagang hindi ang sinasagot niya sa
akin.
She gave out an exasperated sigh and sipped her iced coffee. She looked really torn
between giving in to my whims and standing by her belief. "I don't know. Alam mo
naman kung gaano kahirap kausapin si Dane, 'di ba?"
Don't I know?
I could only just nod. I've been studying here for the past three years but never
once did I get the chance para kausapin si Dane. Every time I would try... para
akong aatakihin sa puso palagi! I swear that man would be the death of me!
"Pretty please?" I said, trying to run out my luck.
Everyday for the past years, I would pester Gabbie para ipakilala ako kay Dane.
She's his best friend and I befriended her para may common friends kami ng soulmate
ko! Yeah, I get it, user ako. But could I care less? She's the only way para
mapalapit ako kay Dane! And I've come to like Gabbie and her peculiar ways
sometimes. And besides, Dane was way too out of my league. Not that I am saying na
wala akong kwentang babae, I have my moments pero once you see him, intimidation
would be your implicit response.
He rarely smiles.
He never talks with his eyes.
It's like... he's dead.
"Okay, fine, I'll try," she said, giving up to my whims.
I smiled and clapped my hands.
"Yey! Thanks, Gabbie! The best ka talaga!"
She rolled her eyes while returning my embrace. "Yeah, yeah. Say that pagkatapos ka
niyang isnob-in."
I only gave her a small smile and walked my way out of the coffee shop. I was sure
I'd have a hard time because Dane's no ordinary guy... but that only made me want
him more. Para kasing mas challenging. Mas may chase. May masarap sa pakiramdam
kapag finally, nakuha mo na.
Pumasok na ako sa class ko since I could not afford to fail this course. Masyado na
akong madaming absences dahil sumisilip ako minsan kay Dane sa archery class niya.
Could you blame me? I'm just a... lady in love. Or maybe I was already out of
bounds but I would always end up justifying my actions when it comes to Dane.
Parang palaging may dahilan kahit minsan, alam ko na para na akong baliw na
nakasunod sa kanya.
Some say it's a preposterous idea kasi not once ko pa nakausap si Dane pero eto
ako, ang lakas ng loob sabihin na mahal ko si Dane. But they don't know how it
feels!
They don't feel the butterflies in my stomach whenever he's around.
They don't have their heart skip a beat whenever I stare at his face.
They don't know how my stomach clenched into knots when he shot me a stray glance.
They just don't get it.
During the class, I tried my best to concentrate. Nabalitaan ko kasi na ga-graduate
with highest Latin honor si Dane kaya eto ako, umaasa na kahit Cum Laude lang
makuha ko. Ayaw ko namang maging kahiya-hiya kung magiging boyfriend ko siya tapos
ang pangit ng transcript ko!
After class, I immediately went out para kunin yung sasakyan ko. Pupunta akong mall
para maghanap ng damit! I would be meeting Dane for the first time tomorrow! As in
first time! Palagi kasi akong nagkaka cold feet pag malapit na siya. This time,
sisiguraduhin ko na mapapansin na niya ako! Three years of waiting in vain was
already enough!
Hinahanap ko yung susi ng sasakyan ko sa purse ng may nakabunggo ako. I was about
to say sorry but... He walked away.
And ignored me. Like he always does.
Like Dane always does.

**
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Chapter 1
--

Chapter One
I TURNED AROUND. Ilang oras na kaming paikot-ikot sa mall pero parang hindi ko pa
rin mahanap iyong perfect dress para sa unang pormal na pagkikita namin ni Dane. I
was so nervous but at the same time, so elated! So I ended up buying a couple para
mayroon akong pagpipilian.
Grabe ang kaba!
"What? Do I look fine?"
Gabbie shrugged. "Passable."
I frowned. "Yeah, right, Gabbie. Passable is what I am aiming for," I said
sarcastically. Nandito kasi kami sa bahay ko and I was trying on some outfit for my
date with Dane. Of course I should look beautiful and not just passable!
Gabbie flipped another page of the glossy magazine she was reading and said, "You
know, Erika, Dane wouldn't even notice what you wear so shake it off."
I didn't bother reasoning with her kasi hindi naman siya makikinig sa akin. She
would never understand how I feel kasi she's never been in love. She's all books
and studies, no wonder nagkakasundo sila ni Dane. Acad freaks.
I walked back in my closet and rummaged through my stuff. I couldn't find anything
decent to wear! Bakit parang biglang nawala lahat ng magaganda kong damit?
Goodness! Ganito talaga ang epekto sa akin ni Dane, nawawala yung cool ko. Si Erika
na cool girl ay nagiging lovesick puppy pag si Nathaniel Dane Guzman na ang pinag
uusapan.
Gabbie glanced at her wrist-watch and said, "Pupunta ka pa ba or what?"
I frowned. "Of course I would go!"
"Then bilisan mo. I told him to go at Meero's ng 3 pm. 2 pm na, Erika. Just
reminding you," she said.
"Fine, fine," I replied. I settled for the perky white dress I bought the last time
I went to Greenbelt. This better be fine. I should look interesting in his eyes.
I've waited for so long!
After prepping up, I rode with Gabbie since coding ngayon yung car sa bahay. She
drove me to Meero's and dropped me there. I'll prolly hail a cab pag uuwi na ako.
Or better yet, siguro naman ihahatid ako ni Dane, 'di ba?
Since it's still early, quarter to 3 pa lang naman so I settled myself on the couch
on the furthest side of the resto-bar. Ayaw ko namang umorder since wala pa si
Dane, it would be really impolite of me na kumain na wala pa siya.
Just as I was waiting, Vance arrived. Okay, what's he doing here?
He saw me looking at him kaya siya lumapit sa akin.
"Erika?" he said then sat on the couch in front of me. "Why are you here? May
kasama ka ba?" he asked.
Actually, Vance was my longtime suitor as well as my ex-best friend. We were really
tight back then. Alam niya namang si Dane talaga yung gusto ko but still, one
night, he confessed that he really likes me and then things got really messed up. I
stopped talking to him for a long time.
Could you blame me? I trusted my feelings to him believing that he's my best friend
pero ano yung ginawa niya? He fell for me? That's a crap! I felt betrayed and
everything. I know I was stupid for hating him because he likes me. That as if he
could control what he feels. But still... I really felt wronged. He was there when
I was pouring my heart out tapos anong ginawa niya? Maybe he's really happy na lagi
akong heartbroken kay Dane! I didn't know but that's what I really feel.
I nonchalantly answered him with, "Waiting for someone."
He showed me his smile. "Samahan muna kita habang naghihintay ka."
I shook my head to decline, hoping na lumayas na siya sa harapan ko.
"No, really. I can manage."
With saying that, his face fell into a very familiar frown na lagi kong nakikita
tuwing nire-reject ko ang mga offers niya.
"Come on, Erika. Are we really doing this cold war?"
I glared at him. "I didn't start this, Vance. Who's the idiot one who fell for his
best friend? Ako ba?"
He gave out an exasperated sigh.
"Ito pa din hanggang ngayon? I can't control my feelings. I don't have a say about
whom I would fall in love with. Tingin mo gusto ko yung nangyayari? Gusto ko yung
halos kahit anino ko ayaw mong makita? I'm tired of all this crap, Erika..." he
said with a trembling voice. I looked away. I didn't want to see how much I was
hurting him.
I was fighting the urge to console him. We were best friends and I care for him but
I knew this was wrong. I didn't want to lead him on kaya hindi ko siya kinakausap.
I want Dane. I love Dane. Kung ipagpapatuloy ni Vance 'tong ginagawa niya, it's
unfair not only for him but also for me. I didn't wanna hurt him.
"Just... go away."
He held my hand and said, "can't we at least try?"
I shook my head firmly. I needed to be firm for the both of us.
"Go away. Hinihintay ko si Dane."
Just then, I saw pain crossed his eyes. He, then, stood up and gave me a half
smile.
"Finally, huh?"
I tried my best to make myself look happy and ecstatic. "Yeah, finally. Aren't you
happy for me?" Right, Erika. Go rub salt on the wound. The harder you rub, the
faster it would heal.
He cocked his head. "I'm happy that you're meeting that bastard? That's bullshit."
He said then disappeared from my vision.
I'm really sorry, Vance. I don't wanna hurt you but it's the only way. Leading you
on would be really cruel of me. You're a really great guy; you'll find someone
new... someone who'll reciprocate your feelings. Not some bitch who's too in love
with someone else. You'd find someone way better than me.
I glanced at my watch. "3:30 na pala. Maybe he's caught in a traffic," I reasoned
with myself. Right now, I was really fighting the urge to call the waiter and order
something. I was almost near the state of being famished.
Minutes later, the clock's near approaching 4 pm. Was I being stood up?
My chest stricken and my eyes began to water. I tried to shake the thoughts away
but they still lingered. It fucking stung!
I dialed Gabbie's number with trembling hands.
"G-gabbie?" I said, trying to keep my voice even but it still broke. Damn this
voice for betraying me at my lowest.
"Yup. What's up?"
"Are you sure na darating si Dane?" I asked, although I already knew that he
wouldn't. My tears were already falling and I was an idiot who kept on wiping them
away. Sobrang pathetic ko. Sobrang pathetic ko na umaasa ako na mapapansin ako ng
isang tao na hindi ko kayang abutin.
Of course he wouldn't. Sino ba naman ako? A lady named Erika who's hopelessly and
helplessly in love with him.
And who's so pathetic and stupid when it comes to him.
"Yeah. I told him to go there, wala pa ba siya?" she worriedly asked.
I tried not to sniff, tried not to show how much this was affecting me... But who
was I kidding? I was crying. I was hurt. I was disappointment. I was all levels of
betrayed.
I rarely cry... All my life, I could remember the times when I cried because those
moments were rare... The first time was when my gold fish died, the second was when
my mom died, the third was when my dad said he'd marry my mom's best friend, and
the rest was because of Dane.
It sucked how much feelings I have invested only to find out I can't get even the
least interest.
"Shit," Gabby cursed. She never curses; only when she's really mad or upset. Maybe
she's upset because I was so stupid. Na kahit ilang beses niya ng sabihin na
tigilan ko na si Dane, sige pa rin ako ng sige. Parang tangang umaasa sa bagay na
maliwanag na wala namang pag-asa. "I'll call him, okay? Stop crying, Erika. I told
you not to hope. He's Dane. I'll call you back."
She ended the line while I got some tissues from my purse and wiped the tears that
continue to fall.
Gabbie told me specifically not to put my hopes up. But can you blame me? I just...
I just really like him. I like him even though it hurt so badly. Kung pwede nga
lang sana iba na lang. Sana yung taong nagustuhan ko yung taong pwede din akong
magustuhan. I wanna love somebody who can make me feel loved. But I still fell for
Dane. I love somebody who makes me feel really worthless and unloved.
I ordered orange juice because the waitress asked me if I was okay. She was worried
because I was crying so hard. I let it all out thinking na baka sakaling mabawasan
iyong sakit... But who was I kidding, really? It stung. It hurt. So fucking much.
"Hello?" I said when Gabbie called back.
"Erika..." she said in a prolonged tone. I knew she's just stalling time because
she can't break the news to me. "He fell asleep. I'm sorry. Sorry. I forgot kasi na
may thesis revision sila kagabi kaya madaling araw na nakauwi si Dane."
My face lit up with what I heard and asked her, "Really? Kamusta? Puyat ba siya?
Hala, sabihin mo naman na sorry kung naabala ko pa siya. Oh, god. Baka isipin niya
ang stalker ko!"
My mood took a 360 degree changed upon hearing his reason. He didn't ditch me. He
has reasons. I smiled to myself. My pathetic, little self.
"No, no. I think he's still asleep. Sorry, Riks. I called her sister, sabi niya
tulog daw si Dane."
"No way," I said, "You're close to his sister?" I asked, disbelief evident in my
voice. I needed to know her as well!
"Yep. She's nice. Gusto mo pakilala kita next time? Pambawi kasi naghintay ka
diyan?"
"Yes, please!"
She chuckled.
"Alright. Sorry talaga, Erika. Nandiyan ka pa ba? Want me to fetch you?"
"No, thanks. I'll get it from here. Pakisabi kay Dane I'm so sorry and good luck sa
thesis niya..."
She sighed.
"Sure. Ingat ka."
I ended the call and tried to calm myself. It usually takes minutes before I could
calm myself down. And when I finally calmed myself, I paid the bills on my tab and
went out.
"Stood up?" I turned my head and saw Vance leaning against the wall with his hands
on his pocket.
I showed him my brave face. I couldn't have him knowing how I was stood up. He
wouldn't understand. He wouldn't understand that we were cut from the same cloth.
He was relentlessly chasing me as I was with Dane. We're both suckers.
"Pakielam mo?"
I was walking and he was trying to walk by my side.
"When will you get na hindi ka niya gusto?"
I faced him and said, "Ikaw? Kailan mo ba makukuha ni hindi kita gusto?" We were
measuring each other. God, I really missed this man but he's really infuriating at
the same time! Bakit ba kasi sa akin pa siya nagkagusto?
He shrugged. "I don't know. Matalino naman ako pero pagdating sa'yo nabobobo ako
eh."
"Tell that to someone who cares."
He winked at me.
"Kaya kita gusto eh. You're the only one who could blow me off effortlessly."
"Try Gabbie, she'll surely crush your man ego in no time."
"Nah. You're more of my type." I glared at him but he just continued following me.
"San ka ba pupunta? Hatid na kita?"
"No, thanks. May pera ako; kaya kong magbayad ng cab."
"Riks naman. San ka nga pupunta? I'll chauffer you around?" he offered. "I'll be
your bitch," sabi niya na kinakunot naman ng noo ko. "I mean, just let me be near
you. I'll do whatever you want."
I sighed and gave in. "Fine. I'll go to my mom." He smiled and led me to his car.
Alam niya naman kung san ako pupunta. We've known each other since high school and
I started not talking to him last year. So basically, he really knows me well.
After a few minutes, we arrived.
"Tagal kong hindi nakapunta kay Auntie ah," he said while we were walking the
familiar path towards my mom's grave. It's only been what? Two years since she died
but... Oh, well. Ano pa bang magagawa ko but to accept the fact that my dad has
already moved on together with my mom's best friend. There's this really
interesting fact, may ate pala ako, rather, nagka ate pala ako. I didn't know but
she died few years ago. I didn't care. She's the fruit of my father's infidelity.
We reached her grave and pulled out the weeds. "Hey, mom." I said then plopped next
to her grave. I talked to her while Vance silently listened to me. Sanay na yan
sa'kin, palagi kasi siyang sumasama dati nung okay pa kami. He's seen me through my
worst' he's seen me on my best. Best friend na talaga kaya lang may gusto sa'kin.
There's where things went wrong.
We sat there for a few silent minutes before we decided to go home.
"Wait lang, Riks. Punta tayo dun," he said, pointing out to a grave nearby. Pumayag
na lang ako and walked with him.
"Felice Bernardo?" I said, reading the name written on the tomb. "kilala mo?" I
asked Vance. It's just weird na bigla na lang siyang pupunta sa tomb ng isang tao.
He shook his head. "Nope. Nacurious lang ako. Tara na?"
I nodded but I continued reading.
"She died 4 years ago. I think she's well loved," I said, noticing the fresh
bouquet of flower on the side of her tomb.
Vance nodded. "Gusto mo din ng flowers?"
"Smooth but try next time."
He winked again. "Sabi mo yan ha! May next time pa ko."
I rolled my eyes. Hay, Vance. Kung wala ka lang talagang tama ng ulo at nagkagusto
sa akin, we could really be good friends.

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Chapter 2
--

Chapter 2
TODAY WAS UNEVENTFUL. Since I was near approaching my thesis days, which meant I
needed to find a place to conduct my 1000 hours of on the job training, kailangan
ko ding magsipag. No time for stalking Dane which was a big bummer!
"Meron ka ng company na pagpapass-an?" Jelly asked me, one of my few close friends
here in SCA.
I shook my head. "Nothing in mind. How about you?"
"I'm aiming for my Dad's company para bawas hassle, right?" she said then winked at
me. I laughed at her. People these days... they would do everything for comfort.
Ako? I'd rather work my ass off in some company than to indulge myself in my
family's business. Besides, what would staying in my comfort zone do for me? I
could think of none.
And I'd really like to get away from my dad and his wife. They make me gag so bad.
"I don't know about that. I think I'll try hunting soon," I replied. She shrugged
and then we went off to our class. Siguro mabuti na din na distracted ako sa acads
ko para hindi ko na din naiisip yung stress ko na nakuha nung hindi ako napuntahan
ni Dane. It's been weeks but I still feel bad. Yeah, I know that his reason's legit
given that he's an acad freak, pero syempre there's still this little part inside
me na nasasaktan dahil tinulugan niya ako!
The class went well since I already did my advance study. I was not the smart-smart
kind of person; I was more of the book-smart person. I think Dane's a really good
influence since before, I took my studies very lightly. I was the go with the flow
kind of girl, well, I was kinda still like that. But since I knew Dane, nagsipag
akong mag aral since I know he won't settle for stupid girls. I better sharpen my
edge, right?
After class, I gathered my things and said goodbye to my friends. I have few
friends since I like to keep my circle close-knit. I have Gabbie (which I
befriended for Dane's sake, but I've now really grown fond of her!), Jelly, Janice,
Kemp, and Russel. I have few friends, no? I was happy with them since I know
they'll be by my side through thick and thin.
I'd rather have few true friends than a flock who's turn their back on me on the
first sign of distress.
I went home after class since my professor called dibs and cancelled the class. I
love that old guy!
"Dad?" I called out since I saw dad's car parked in the garage.
"Hey, baby. How was school?" he asked me. I knew I loathe my dad because he
remarried just two years after my mom died, but what could I do? He's still my dad.
I shrugged. "Okay lang."
He smiled at me and pointed on the sofa. "Your Mama Angel asked me to give that to
you."
I rolled my eyes. "She's not my Mama Angel. She's my mom's ex best friend." Bakit
ba kasi pinipilit niya akong tawaging mommy si Tita Angel eh hindi ko naman siya
mommy? Pasalamat nga siya hindi ako nagpapaka bratinella eh!
"Fine, whatever. Angel said na suotin mo yan. We'll have dinner later."
"What for?" I asked. I wasn't in the mood to indulge whatever she's cooking. Hindi
kami ganoon ka-close. I was barely tolerating her.
"I don't know, sabi lang ni Angel, doll up—her exact words—kasi may ipapakilala
siya sa'yo," Dad said with a knowing smile. Better that be good kasi I was all
stressed out with the school stuff and Dane stuff.
I spent my whole afternoon listening to random music while doing my advance study.
I also called Gabbie for some Dane update. She almost killed me through the phone,
telling me na nakakatakot na yung obsession ko kay Dane. Tss. Better be obsessed
with Dane kaysa ma obsess kay Einstein like her.
"He's busy with his thesis! Ang kulit mo naman eh."
"Kasi naman, I haven't seen him in school kaya nagtatanong ako, 'di ba?"
"Of course you wouldn't see him in school, Erika. Sa bahay siya gumagawa ng
thesis."
"Why? Anong meron sa bahay nila?" I asked, mas okay gumawa ng thesis sa lib, 'di
ba?
"Ano dapat ang wala sa bahay nila... Walang stalkers like you sa bahay nila."
I just laughed at her. Sanay na ako kay Gabie na medyo moody. Syempre kailangan
kong magtiis since nakikihingi lang naman ako ng information tungkol kay Dane.
"Grabe naman 'to. Sige na nga, good luck sa final revisions mo, Gabbie! Bye!" I
said then ended the call. Ganun ba talaga pag graduating? Masyadong haggard sa
lahat ng bagay. Sana hindi haggard si Dane, kawawa naman ang baby ko kung stressed
out siya tapos wala namang mag aalaga sa kanya kasi wala naman siyang girlfriend...
Pero nandito naman ako. I just wished he'd finally see me. Even look at my way.
Kahit glance lang, matutuwa na ako...
After few hours of reading over the paper works and writing my requirements,
nagsimula na akong mag ayos. Two hours to seven pm pa naman so I have all the time
in the world.
I heard a faint knock on the door. "Come in," I said while ironing my hair. I saw
Tita Angel's reflection on the mirror and so I rolled my eyes at her.
"You look so pretty, Erika," she said.
I smiled sarcastically. "Thanks. Ang ganda ng genes best friend mo eh." We used to
be very tight since she has no daughter kaya ako ang itinuturing niyang anak. Her
daughter died and buti nga sa kanya. That's what she gets dahil inagaw niya ang
asawa ng best friend niya.
She stood behind me and helped me iron my hair. "Still mad at me?"
"Why would I be mad at you naman, Tita Angel?" I asked, my horns starting to show
up.
She heaved a heavy sigh. "You know I didn't ask for your mom to die, right? I love
her with all of my heart, Erika. It just so happened that she died and I fell for
your father. Please don't make it hard for me to be your mom..."
I stood up and faced her with my face contorted in anger. "I would never make it
hard for you because I'll never give you the chance to be my mom." I said then
stormed out of the room. I hate talks like that! Ayoko ng pinag uusapan si mom.
Everything's still freshly etched in my memory.
The car...
The accident...
The blood...
No, I can't take and digest everything.
I got myself a glass of water and calmed myself. I wouldn't cry. I can't cry. I
promised myself I won't cry over trivial things. My tears are too precious to be
shed over petty things.
Minutes later, I found myself inside a car together with dad and Tita Angel. They
were happily engaging in chat while I sulked at the side of the car. As if I would
talk to them. Not in my wildest dreams.
We arrived in the destination few minutes later. Naunang bumaba ng sasakyan si dad
kaya naiwan kami ni Angel sa loob. I sometimes only call her Angel pag sobrang
naiirita ako sa kanya. Like right now.
"Erika?"
"What?" I asked, irritated.
"I'll introduce you to someone tonight, okay? Sana hindi ka na magalit sa akin."
I raised a brow. "Who would you introduce to me para mawala ang galit ko? Ian
Somerhalder? Harry Styles? O baka naman si Zac Efron?"
She smiled at me softly. "Much better, Erika," she said then she got something out
from her clutch. "Here, a gift," she said as she handed me a pearl necklace.
"Ano'ng meron?"
She shook her head. "Nothing; gusto ko lang ibigay sa'yo yan."
I shrugged. "Thanks, then."
She helped me wear the necklace at pinayagan ko naman siya. Baka kasi magsumbong
kay daddy at ako pa ang mapagalitan.
We walked to the hotel and looked for dad na may kausap na business partner, I
think? We approached them.
"Mr. Guzman, this is my daughter, Erika. Erika, meet Mr. Andrei Guzman, the owner
of this hotel," dad said as I shook the guy's hand.
"Nice to meet you po," I said with a shy smile on my face. Lagi naman kasi akong
pinapakilala ni dad sa mga business partners niya and so I have mastered the art of
fake smiling.
"Nice to meet you din, hija," he said, "Salamat nga pala, Angel. Alam mo naman yung
inaanak mo parang patay na minsan. Baka okay din na maging friends sila ni Erika,"
he said and I didn't quite get what he said.
"Oo naman, Andy. O sige, mauna na kami at baka naghihintay na yung anak mo," my dad
said.
"Sige, sige. May dinner meeting din kasi ako," he said then disappeared from our
vision.
"Let's go?" my dad said then he anchored Angel's arms on his and mine on the other.
Tss.
We walked to a fancy restaurant. Seems like nagpareserve na pala si daddy kasi may
private room na naka-assign sa amin.
"This way, sir," sabi nung usher sa amin. We walked to the far-east side of the
resto and entered a room. Binigyan ng tip ni daddy yung waiter tapos binuksan niya
yung sliding door na Japanese styled.
Nung bumukas yung pinto, tumayo din yung lalaki na naka suit.
"Good evening po."
Oh God.
Crap!
"Shit," I muttered. Ano'ng ginagawa ni Dane dito?! Napatingin si dad at Angel sa
akin pati na si Dane. Okay, center of unwanted attention ako ngayon! And god, did I
just curse in front of Dane?!

--- --- ---

Chapter 3
--

Chapter 3
ANGEL SEEMED PRETTY amused with my reaction. Well, I couldn't exactly blame her
because I was a stuttering mess right now! She wrapped her arm around my waist at
pinakilala ako kay Dane. Dang! I should be the one introducing myself and not her!
"Dane, hijo, this is Erika, my daughter," she said. I would have loved to vomit
right there when she said daughter pero baka ma-turn off si Dane sa akin, so I
opted not to.
I smiled and offered him my hand. Good gracious, my hand was trembling
uncontrollably! Angel seemed to notice my disgrace kaya dahan dahan niyang binaba
yung kamay ko while Dane was looking at my freaking trembling hand. Oh, god! Maybe
he thought I was weird! Hindi ako weird! Talagang kinakabahan lang ako!
"Shall we sit?" Dad interrupted. Naupo kami. This time, I would say how I love
dinner! Dane was right by my side, could you imagine that? Just with a little
movement of my arm, madidikit ako sa kanya. But then, I tried to keep my cool. I
don't wanna scare him off by acting like some lunatic bitch.
"So Dane, how was life?" Tanong ni Tita Angel. Yeah since she's in my good graces
for introducing me to Dane, I'll call her Tita once again.
Dane gave her a small smile and said, "School's fine po."
I just fell in love even harder! He's so respectful even though Tita Angel didn't
deserve any respect. But then, I'm getting a little curious, Tita Angel and Dane
seemed pretty close?
Tita Angel nodded. "Of course, school is fine. You're such a brilliant young man,
Dane."
Dane gave another small smile and then said thanks... of course with a po. We
started with the appetizer. The chats were boring since basically, it's Dane and
Angel who were doing all the talking. I, on the other hand, was admiring Dane's
beauty.
He's just... so perfect.
Nakapagtataka dahil ang sipag magsalita ni Dane. In our school, he's famous for
being a one liner guy. He wouldn't talk to almost anyone except for the professors
and a very few friends. To those he didn't know? It's lucky enough if you get him
to speak five words.
While they were continuing chatting, dad excused himself. I know what's the reason
since I believe his phone vibrated. Maybe it's business stuff. It's always like
this. We're in the middle of family affair pero iiwan niya kami for some meeting.
Maybe that's why mom died. She's too tired of Dad ignoring her. Maybe Angel would
die, too, if dad ignored her?
"Excuse me, I'll just follow Greg," Tita Angel excused herself, as well. Oh god!
Naiwan kami ni Dane.
'Calm down, Erika. Don't lose your cool. Act normal.' I reminded myself.
I stared at him for a brief moment and smiled.
"So, I'm Erika. You're Dane, right?" I asked, even though I practically knew how he
likes his steak done. Yeah, I was that advanced with my information about him.
He gave me a slight nod.
"How did you know Tita Angel?"
"A friend's mom," he said apprehensively, as if he didn't want to disclose any
information about his relation to my mother's traitor best friend.
I decided not to push my luck by getting him to talk. I was definitely happy with
my accomplishments tonight! I got to share a dinner with my baby and I got him to
talk to me!
Since ang tagal mawala ni dad at Angel, I didn't know if they're doing that on
purpose or if they're just busy going something. Either way, I was happy to be
alone with Dane.
We sat there for five uncomfortable minutes of silence. Even if it was
uncomfortable, I found myself relaxing beside him.
He's my chemical for my chemically induced coma.
"So... tiga St. Claire's ka din, 'di ba?"
He nodded. "Yes. You're from there as well," he said while my jaw literally fell!
Alam niya kung saan ako nag-aaral!
"W-what?"
"Schoolmates tayo, 'di ba?" he said while he continued slicing up his well-done
steak. Like he didn't just cause me my mini heart attack!
Oh, god! He knew of my existence! All these time, I thought he didn't even knew
there's this girl named Erika who's hopelessly in love with him, but now I
discovered that he knew about me!
"Kilala mo ako?" I asked, tears forming in my eyes. It was silly, I knew, but it
was such a big deal to me!
He nodded while chewing his food. After swallowing up, and after I watched his
adam's apple moved up and down in that very sexy manner, he said, "You're Gabbie's
friend. Nakita kita minsan kasama siya."
I knew it! Good idea talaga yung pakikipag kaibigan ko kay Gabbie!
"But how did you know my name?"
He shrugged coldly. "Sometimes, Gabbie wouldn't shut up about you. I've heard
enough about you, I think I could publish your biography."
Kill me now! Kill me now and I wouldn't even care because I was so happy! I could
seriously kiss Gabbie dahil sa mga ginagawa niya! Who knew sobrang kilala pala ako
ni Dane to the point na pwede niya akong gawan ng biography? I must be the luckiest
woman alive!
I couldn't help but smile at his response. "Nakakahiya naman..."
"It's okay since you're Tita Angel's daughter," he said, while looking at me. He
stared at me for a while and I swear my face's heating up! He went near me and
caressed my face. He seemed to be studying my face.
"Your eyes, your lips, your cheeks..." he paused and then dabbed the stray tendrils
on my face. "Do you like me?"
I was literally taken aback by his question! If I answered yes, since that's my
real answer, maybe he'd think I'm a freak! I didn't want that so I told him no.
"No, of course not!" I said in my defense. My heart beat's running right now! Hold
your horses, Erika. Now wasn't the greatest time for your panic attack.
He motioned his head up and down and gave me a small smile. "Good, because you're
bad for me."
The dinner went well for them... it went worst for me. After Dane said that line, I
felt like my heart has been ripped out of my chest and pounded into a million tiny
pieces. It hurt... so much... so badly.
"Thanks for your time, Dane," Angel said whilst hugging that cruel man.
He gave Angel a small smile and hugged her back. "Anytime po." He turned his face
towards me and smiled at me, as well. As if he didn't just break my heart. "See you
around school, Erika."
But my traitor self betrayed me. I felt my self blushing at his mere mention of my
name. God! Do I love him that much? That even though he rendered me dead just a
freaking few minutes ago, just him saying my name, I decided to forego all his
mischief?
I gave him an awkward smile. "Yeah, see you around."
We waited for the valet for our car. Dane saw us off. He's really a gentleman and
he's also too straightforward.
The moment I got home, I went to my room and dialed Gabbie's number.
"What do you need?" she said, irritation very evident in her voice. I guessed I
just destroyed her peaceful slumber.
"Sorry for waking you up but I gotta tell you this!" I squeaked. "I finally met
Dane!"
She yawned. "Good for you," she mumbled.
"Could you pretend to be a bit euphoric for me?" I sarcastically said.
"Fine, fine. I'm happy for you. Fill me in with the details," she said while still
yawning.
I've decided to ditch her bored tone and tell her everything that happened this
evening. I told her every detail! Kahit na ang sakit sa pride nung huling sinabi ni
Dane sa akin. It hurt! Me? Bad for him? Wala pa nga akong ginagawa, bad for him na
agad ako?
I promise I'd be the perfect girl for him if only he'd give me the chance. It's so
unfair of him dismissing me without even looking closely.
"...so yeah, what could you say?"
"What do you want me to say?"
"Why do you think he did that? I mean, I didn't even do anything stupid,
figuratively speaking."
"He's got issues, Erika. He's weirder if you got to be with him, swear."
"Weird weird or weird adorable?"
"Weird annoying, that he is."
"How come? Ang galang niya and he's too straight forward."
"Yes, he's really respectful towards girls kaya madaming naiinlove sa kanya. Sad to
say, those who fell for him are only those who don't know him like you. Once na
makasama mo siya on a regular basis, you'll see his other side. The side where he's
like a living dead. That's why we hit it off because I don't like talking to him.
We're best friends kasi nagkakasundo kami by mutually agreeing on not speaking
unless really needed."
I cringed in thought about their deal. They're really weird but that didn't make me
love him less.
"He's not a living dead!" I said in his defense. "Sumasagot siya pag nag sasalita
ako!"
I could practically see her rolling her eyes on me. "Yeah, yeah. I told you living
dead, not mute. He talks, duh. But there's no... how do I put it? No feelings. He's
like there but he's not there. Ugh. I can't explain. I would just drag Dane para
ikaw na mismo ang maka feel. Seems like an easy job since magkakilala naman na
kayo."
"Yes, we know each other," I said while smiling like an idiot. "And Gabbie? I love
you!" I said then ended the call and rolled on the bed.
Seems like this year's gonna be fun!

--- --- ---

Chapter 4
--

Chapter 4
"YOU'RE QUITE IN a good disposition, my friend," Kemp, one of my close friends,
said. I like him as a friend since we can hash out about random things but can
still be friends after all the drama. Plus, he's an effeminate. Pag sinama ko siya
sa mall, siya pa mismo ang pipili ng damit ko. He's quite an eye candy but such a
shame since pareho kami ng type.
Not that he's my type since I have always got my eyes on Dane since the
first time I saw him.
I sweetly smiled at him. "Of course, my friend. Today is a good day,
right?" I said as I scribbled Dane's name on my notes. Writing his name on paper
has always been my thing lalo na kapag wala akong ginagawa. Ewan ko ba. The action
relaxes me. Na parang kahit sa papel man lang, may koneksyon kami ni Dane.
The dinner with Dane happened few days ago but the effect was still as
strong as if it happened just a while ago. I could get used to this euphoric
ambiance.
"Let me guess, si Dane ang dahilan no?" Janice said as she sat down
beside me. Janice and Kemp were exes. They broke up because Janice can't satisfy
Kemp, you know. Pareho silang mahilig sa xy chromosomes. And siguro Janice was just
so dense na hindi niya agad napansin—or maybe she just turned a blind eye because
it's so obvious that Kemp digs guys din!
I nodded. "Yup, the one and only."
"Fill us with the details naman!" Kemp demanded. Ang arte lang talaga
ng lalaking 'to! Hindi naman siya sobrang bakla, hindi din sobrang lalaki. Just
midway on both sides.
I rolled my eyes but nevertheless filled them up with the details. Of
course my heart was fluttering while talking about the incidence. I just expunged
the 'you're bad for me' part since I didn't want to tarnish my ego by admitting
that I was rebuffed from the very beginning! Nakakahiya. Me? Erika Garillo, basted
na agad kay Dane? No, I wouldn't give them the chance to mock me. Ang lakas pa
naman manukso ng mag ex na'to!
"Oh, my god, Erika! He knows you!" Janice squealed so loud I had to
cover my ears.
She was instantly halted by Kemp because he covered her mouth with his
hands. "Shut up nga, Janice! Masyado kang agaw eksena sa caf!" He reprimanded her
then shifted his attention to me and said, "So, how was the experience, bebe? If I
know, halos mamatay ka na sa kilig!"
"I know! I almost died when he mentioned my name. But syempre I had to
keep my cool, ayoko ngang mapagkamalang fan girl."
Of course I had to control myself. If I would act like some random
cheap girls na nagkakagusto kay Dane, what would that make me? I would be just like
them, pathetic and worthless. Yes, I was in love with Dane but that didn't mean I
was stepping way below my level. I could like him and remain classy at the same
time. Of course that meant I don't squeal and the likes when he's around. But
fluttering of the heart is acceptable.
"Very good tactic, Erika. Of course kailangan nating pangalagaan ang
image. Hindi katulad ng isa diyan," Kemp said, subtly referring to Janice. If I
hadn't known better, iisipin ko na bitter lang 'tong dalawa sa isa't isa.
"Excuse me, sirang sira na ang image ko dahil pumatol ako sa bading na
kagaya mo!" Janice retorted.
Kemp acted like he's shocked. "Excuse me, I'm not bakla! I consider
myself as effeminate. Cheap mo talaga, bakit ba kita naging ex? Nakakadiri, I'm
getting goosebumps!"
I just shook my head as they continued bickering. May appointment nga
pala ako sa adviser ko mamaya para sa practicum ko. Next sem pa naman yun but she's
asking me to submit a list of company names na possible kong puntahan. In relation
to that, graduating na nga pala si Dane. Kainis! Kung kailan nalaman kong kilala
niya pala ako, dun pa nasakto na ga-graduate na siya. Stupid and unfair life.
I read my notes since umalis na si Janice at Kemp, may class din kasi
sila. I was all alone but that's fine. Kailangan ko din ng lone time since final
exams are approaching. I was all pressured kasi confirmed na na Summa Cum Laude si
Dane! Nakakahiya sa akin. I needed to buckle up. Kahit Cum Laude lang, pwede na
ako. I just needed one of those stupid Latin Honors inscribed on my diploma.
"You're welcome," sabi ni Vance whilst sitting in front of me and
pushing in front of me a tray full of foods.
I raised a brow. "Inutusan ba kitang bilhan ako ng pagkain?"
He shook his head then smiled at me. "Wala lang. Baka kasi nagugutom ka
na." He opened the wrapper of banana bread. "Oh. Favorite mo 'to, 'di ba?" he said,
offering me that damned irresistible bread!
 I blenched at him but nonetheless accepted the food. "Thanks. Bakit ka
nga pala nandito?"
He shrugged and said, "Break. Kakatapos lang ng exams ko eh. Ikaw?
Bakit wala kang kasama?"
"Review. Vance?"
"Hmm?"
"Stop courting me," I said, point blank.
He gave me a half-smile. "Ito na naman?" I nodded. "I told you, Riks. I
would have stopped ages ago kung kaya ko. But I obviously can't."
"But you know na wala kang pag asa sa akin, right?" He nodded. "Then
stop, Vance. Hindi bagay sa'yo yung martyr effect."
He chuckled. "Why? Missing my machismo?"
I gaged and acted as if what he said was disgusting. "Ew. Mandiri ka
nga. Sige na, please? I miss my best friend..." I admitted. I miss hanging out at
his place; I miss goofing around with him. Nakakailang na kasing gawin ngayon since
I know na may feelings siya para sa akin. I just needed him to... shut his feelings
off for me.
"I'm still your best friend. Ikaw lang naman eh... Hindi mo na ko
pinapansin."
I rolled my eyes again. "Of course. Ang weird mo kasi. Stop giving me
flowers kung ayaw mong itrato kita as invisible man. Seriously, you're creeping me
out."
He acted hurt. "Ouch. Hindi na nga, 'di ba? Kaya pagkain na lang
ibibigay ko sa'yo."
"Tsk. Kulit mo talaga."
"Mahal mo naman."
"Asa ka pa."
"Umaasa talaga ako."
I decided to give up. Wala ding mangyayari. Close minded talaga ng
lalaking 'to. I just continued reading my notes while he stared at my face. Creepy
niya talaga. Bakit kasi hindi na lang siya maghanap ng babae na magmamahal sa
kanya. Anyone would do but me. Aish! Pag ako talaga nainis, ibebenta ko si Vance
kay Kemp. Type pa naman siya nun.
"Hey," I said.
"What?"
"Friends na kami ni Dane."
He nodded. "Yeah, I know. Nakita ko sa instagram mo," he said
nonchalantly. Oo nga pala, pinost ko sa instagram ko yung picture namin! Syempre
family pic with Dane. Masyado namang halata kung kami lang dalawa. Kulang na nga
lang icrop ko yung mukha ni Tita Angel para family picture na talaga.
"Konti na lang magiging close na kami," I said to him para mahimasmasan
na siya sa mga nararamdaman niya.
"Tapos?"
"Tapos magiging boyfriend ko na siya," I said.
"I told you I'm not interested."
I turned around only to find Dane standing behind me. Oh, earth.
Swallow me now!
"J-joke lang naman yun," I said, defending my self even though I knew I
was already busted. I saw Vance chuckling in front of me. That bastard! He provoked
me kasi alam niyang padating si Dane!
He shrugged. "Okay."
Thank God. Did he buy my reason? I didn't care. Basta mawala yung
attention sa akin, I was so good with anything right now!
"Bakit ka nga pala nandito?" I asked even though my heart was already
thumping wild.
"Sabi ni Gabbie hinahanap mo daw ako," he casually said with his hands
both inside his pocket and looking at me. I would have probably stumbled on the
floor kung nakatayo ako, buti na lang nakaupo ako.
"H-hinahanap kita?" I asked. Oh, Gabbie! Napaka wrong timing mo naman!
You should've given me a heads up, hindi yung bigla bigla mo na lang pinapapunta si
Dane without prior notice. Gusto mo ba akong patayin sa kaba?
He nodded. "May sasabihin ka ba sa'kin?"
I shook my head. "W-wala. Baka nagkamali lang si Gabbie."
He nodded. "Okay. Alis na ko," he said then he turned around.
"Sandali lang," Vance interrupted. Aish! Ano na naman ang gagawin
niya?! Dane looked back since tinawag siya ni Vance.
"Bakit?"
Vance offered his hand. "Vance nga pala. Soon to be boyfriend ni
Erika."
Dane nodded and gave a small smile. "Dane. Good. I think you're good
for her," he said then he left.
Dane, you're so vague. Who's good for whom? Who's bad for whom? 

--- --- ---

Chapter 5
--
Chapter 5
I was sitting prettily on the sofa when Angel decided to bother me. Seriously,
bakit ba gusto siya ni Daddy? I mean, I get it. She's pretty and all. But she's
freaking annoying to the point I wanna strangle her!
"Hey," she said, sitting beside me. I raised a brow to acknowledge her presence.
"What do you want?" I asked her.
I know what she would say, she wants to talk to me and stuff. She wants to get
close to me since we're now a family. Well let me break the news, Angel. We'll
never be a family. Never was, never will. I loathe you with all that I am.
She smiled at me. "I just wanna ask you. I heard you need to find a place to
conduct your practicum. Any place you have in mind?"
I continued painting my nail pink and asnwered her with a very bored tone. "Yes, I
think I got that covered. Thanks for asking, tho."
She smiled at me. I swear when she smiles, she looks like an angel. Too bad I hate
her. Who wouldn't hate the person who married your dad just a few years after your
mom died? Include the fact that that woman was your mother's best friend. Ugh. I
just loathe her. She makes my blood constantly boil.
"Anyway, how was Dane? I saw him last week. Kinamusta kita sa kanya..."
She immediately caught my attention when she mentioned Dane.
"What? Ano'ng sabi niya?" I asked, full of enthusiasm.
Angel smiled at my reaction. "He said he thinks you're a good girl. Pero hindi ka
din daw niya nakikita since tapos na siya sa requirements niya sa school. He's just
waiting for his diploma."
I instantly frowned upon hearing that. Wala na talaga si Dane sa SCA. While me? I'm
stuck for another year. Bakit ba kasi hindi kami sabay pinanganak? Why should I be
delayed by a year? Ayan tuloy! Graduate na siya samantalang ako, undergrad pa din!
Nakakainis!
"That's...good. Tell him I said congrats," I uttered. Angel smiled at me. Wait, I
remembered I should ask her about her relation with Dane. "Hey," I called her. I
don't wanna address her as Tita or what. A simple Hey would be sufficient. "How did
you know Dane?" I asked, obviously fishing for information. I hope I don't sound
too nosy.
"He's a friend of my daughter..." she said with an obvious melancholy in her voice.
I did tell that she lost her daughter years ago. I didn't get the chance to know
her daughter since she lives in Batangas with Angel while I stay in Makati. And I
won't stress myself to travel just to meet her. Duh.
I shrugged, "so, ano sila? Bakit sila magkakilala ni Dane?" I asked, discarding the
fact that she's currently reminiscing her cherished memories with her departed
daughter.
"They were good friends."
I decided not to push through. Friends lang pala eh. Besides, she's already dead.
She won't be a threat.
After that talk with Tita Angel (I call her Tita since she aggreed to set up
another dinner with Dane) I went to school. Nakaka stress na talaga yang practicum!
It eats my time. 
"Bebe!" Kemp called me. I rolled my eyes but nonetheless exchange pleasantries with
him. "Sup?" I asked him... her. Whatever.
"Kainis si Miss LaFo!" He said, pertaining to Miss La Forteza. Pareho kasi kami ni
adviser. If you're wondering about our course, BA Operation Administration ang
business degree namin. I know, it's all too cliched. But what could I do? I'm the
sole heiress of my dad's... and unfortunately, Angel's fortune. I need to buckle up
by studying how to manage their money.
"What? Ano na naman ginawa ni Miss?"
"I passed a list of possible company pero she turned it all down! Nakuha na daw ng
classmates natin."
Fudge! I knew it! I should have manage this thing a long time ago. Ngayon pa ba ako
masstress? Nakakainis!
"As in lahat?" I asked him. That was quite a list. Almmost all of the good
companies here in the Metro yun eh...
He nodded. "Only 2 student per company kaya ganun. You know what's our last
resort?"
"What?"
"Your baby's hotel."
I swear, my jaw dropped.
"Pardon?" I asked, baka kasi nagkamali lang ako ng tingin.
"I said, yung hotel na lang nila Dane yung available. You see, pati company niyo
meron na. Gaga ka kasi! Sabi mo nga pala sa dad mo na hindi ka dun magppracticum!"
He reminded me. Well, yes. Hinding hindi ako magppracticum dun! I wouldn't spend
1000 hours in there. Dun din kasi nagttrabaho si Angel. Nightmare lang pag
nagkataon!
"Eh kila Dane? Bakit pwede pa?"
He smiled at me and suggesstively raised his brow, "choosy kasi yung hotel nila.
Apparently, bagsak lahat ng aspirant nating classmates. I think you could pull some
strings. I heard na close sila ni Tita Angel, di ba? Maybe she could talk to him?
Please, bebe girl? We need this!"
I sighed, "I'll try, ha? You know I hate asking for favor lalo na kay Tita Angel. I
don't like the feeling of being indebted."
He smiled at kissed my cheek. "You can do that, bebe! Partners tayo ha?"
I nodded. Ano pa nga ba?
After talking to Miss LaFo, I excitedly went home. Dinner with Dane later kasi! I
need to doll up! The competition is getting tougher. I heard na madaming maganda sa
company nila. I need to secure my place, no! Hindi ako magpapatalo sa mga gold
digger na mga babae! If I know, pera lang naman ang gusto nila kay Dane. Tss. Mga
user!
Nakita yata ako ni Dad na sobrang saya kaya hinarang niya ako. "Masyadong masaya
yata ang anak ko ah?"
I beamed, "you bet, dad!"
"Care to share?"
I shrugged, "you know, I'm in love."
Natigilan siya sa narinig niya. "Come again, young lady?"
I rolled my eyes. Hindi na ako bata! "I said I'm in love. So? Could I go now?"
"Not so fast. Who's this young guy I need to castrate?"
I glared at him. "Castrate?! Are you nuts, Dad?! Why would you castrate Dane?!"
"Dane? As in Dane Guzman?"
"Yes! And don't you dare castrate him!" I fumed. Buti na lang dumating na si Angel.
I swear muntik ko ng tanggalin yung shoes ko at ibato kay dad.
Angel was laughing at us. Anything funny? Kainis!
"Hon, Dane is a great kid. I think he's good for Erika."
"How sure are you? Kilala mo ba siya?"
Angel nodded, "I know him enough. Okay, hon? Don't stress yourself." Yuck. Hon.
Dad seemed to relaxed a bit. I took the liberty to go to my room. He stalled me
enough. Now, I need to clean up fastly! What should I wear? Hay! The pressure of
being a girl. You need to look pretty all the time.
I once again heard a faint knock. "What?"
"Sorry sa dad mo. Alam mo naman na isa ka lang na princess namin. He was just
looking out for you..." She said, with matching emotions and all.
"Yeah, yeah."
"Anyway, Kemp called me. He said you have a favor to ask?"
I mentally cursed. Kemp talaga! Maybe he thought na hindi ako magtatanong kay
Angel. Well, duh! Hindi talaga noh! Mag aapply na lang ako kaysa humingi ng favor.
Mataas naman ang grades ko, all thanks to Dane. Palibasa ang pangit ng grades niya
kaya kailangan niya ng sure pass sa company nila Dane. User na baklita!
I shrugged and gave up. What could I do? Nandito na eh. "About that..." I said.
Pinagpatuloy ko na yung tatanong ko. What do I have to lose? Well, I have to lose
my dignity. After all the hatred, I'lll succumb to her? Tsk. This is all Kemp's
fault!
After speaking, she smiled and said yes. Of course she'll say yes. Laki lang ng
takot niya sakin. I could really make her life a living hell if she'll go against
my wishes.
Natapos na akong maghanda tapos dumiretso na ulit kami sa hotel nila Dane, na soon
magiging work place ko na din! I'm so excited!
We exchanged pleasantries. Nagbeso beso kami ni Dane! Oh, my god! 
"Nice to see you again," he said. Good gracious! Mahihimatay yata ako!
I smiled back, but really, my insides were churning up and down. "Me, too. Nice to
see you."
Dad had this very intimidating looks at Dane! I hate when he's that protective!
Nakakainis! What's not to like about Dane? He's perfect for me!
We ordered the usual and as usual, biglang umalis si Dad since you know, business
calls. 
"So, Dane..." Angel said. "Could you do me a favor?"
Dane smiled and nodded. "Anything po, Tita."
Ugh! Naiinis ako. Kailan ba ako makakarinig ng 'Anything for you, Erika?' Konti na
lang pagseselosan ko na 'tong si Angel!
"As you see, Erika needs a place for her practicum and apparently, itong business
niyo na lang ang last resort niya. She's too self righteous to work in her dad's
company," she added.
I beamed. That's right, Tita Angel. Build me up some more!
Dane looked at me and smiled, "of course. Ano'ng work po ba?"
I cut in, "anything. Nagttrabaho ka na dito di ba?"
He nodded.
"Could I be your assistant?" I asked. Oh, my god! What did I just say? Baka isipin
niya patay na patay ako sa kanya at isa akong stalker! Stupid mouth! Wala ka bang
filter? Oh, god!
He seemed taken aback by my frankness. "Assistant?"
Hindi ako makapagsalita. I should die! Nakakahiya ako!
"Maybe she could be your assistant, Dane? You know, baka mahirapan si Erika sa
trabaho. If you're her boss, maybe she'll have lighter workload?" Tita Angel saved
me! "She's our princess, Dane. We don't want her to be running around doing errands
for other people."
Dane gave up and sighed. "Okay po, Tita Angel."
I smiled. Oh, god! I love you na, Tita Angel!
Just then, Dane stared at me. As in stared, like he's remembering something. "Are
you sure you wanna work for me?" I could only nod. "I'm an uptight man. Could you
handle me?"
I nodded. You could be whatever you want and I would love to handle every bit of
you, Dane.

--- --- ---

Chapter 6
--
Chapter 6
I stared at the mirror for a bit. I've waited for this for so long! One month akong
nag aral ng mabuti para maipasa ko yung exams ko with flying colors. I don't need
to be stalled because of some useless excuse called bad grades. Apparently, I still
need to maintain a good grade until the end of the sem para matanggap ako sa
company nila Dane. Well, I did. Of course I did! Why would I fail if Dane's at
stake?
I checked my clutch and my heels. First day of being his assistant. Oh, I am so
sure my summer would be terrific!
I went down to eat breakfast with Dad and Tita Angel. I would ride with them since
I don't know how to drive. Well, I chose to remain clueless about driving. Besides,
we have drivers naman so why bother learning?
"Are you ready to work, honey?" dad asked me. I nodded and smiled while doing
semantics for Tita Angel to pass me the platter of bacon. Dad eyed me with
suspicion. "You'll work there, Erika. What's with the... profuse attire?"
I mentally checked what I was wearing. What's wrong with my attire? I was just
wearing a tight fitting, cream colored mini-skirt and a white sheer button up
blouse with matching black YSL pumps. I look pretty kaya!
Dad sighed, "you should look more professional, honey. Go and change. Wear
something less revealing."
I rolled my eyes, "dad, you're not my boss. You can't tell me what to wear."
"I know, I'm just concerned..."
Tita Angel interrupted, "maybe your dad would appreciate kung magsusuot ka ng hindi
sheer, Erika? Your bra's showing."
I sighed, "Tita Angel, this is fashion. Besides, what's wrong? I have a good figure
so why hide it?" I said then ignored my dad's remarks and continued eating my
breakfast. I need to fuel up. Uptight pa naman si Dane! I know life as his
assistant won't be so easy... but it will be a hell lot of fun!
After a long discussion about why I should change clothes, nag give up din si Dad.
Masyado kasing old fashioned. 21st century na, I could dress as skimpy as I want
and no one would give a d-amn.
Hinatid na nila ako sa tapat ng hotel ni Dane. Oh, this certainly feels so good!
I waited for Kemp since it's kinda early pa naman. Office hours start at 7 am. 6:30
pa lang so I shouldn't give a fuss. I called Kemp and he said he's caught in a
traffic jam. Baklita talaga! Since I knew I would have probably end up waiting for
nothing since stranded pa sa traffic si Kemp, nagpunta muna ako sa coffee shop.
'Hmmm, should I get Dane a coffee?' I blushed at the thought. 
Frappe? Americano? Latte? Macchiato? Hmm. How does Dane like his coffee?
"One Americano," I heard a very familiar voice beside me. No need to turn and look
for the one who spoke. I knew who he was. I perfectly knew. Nonetheless, I turned
around and saw his radiant face smiling at me. "Good morning," he said.
Oh, God! I could really get used to his smiling face and a morning greeting!
"G-good morning." Darn it! Why am I stuttering?!
Nakuha niya na yung order niya. "Do you want coffee? My treat." I could only nod.
For the first time, ililibre ako ni Dane! I'm so freaking happy! "Ano'ng gusto mo?"
"Triple shot espresso."
He smiled and ordered for me. "I didn't think you're an espresso kind of girl," he
commented.
Is he trying to start a conversation? Geez! Thanks, Kemp! I love you, baklita!
"Why? What kind of girl am I for you?" I said, more like flirted back.
He shrugged. "More on the sweet coffee. Espresso's too strong for a sweet girl like
you," he said then handed me my coffee, "there you go."
I said my thanks and we walked side by side towards their hotel. Goodness! If
everyday would be like this, then my summer would be super terrific!
We finished our coffee on the way then headed towards the lift. Assistant nga pala
ako. Should I call him Sir?
"Uhm, Sir Dane?"
He turned around, "bakit?"
"Uhm, wala po."
He smiled and looked down on me since he's towering above me. "Don't call me sir.
Just reserve that for my dad."
"Okay po."
"And drop the po. Mas matanda lang ako ng dalawang taon sa'yo."
I blushed. Alam niya kung ilang taon ako! Pwede ko na bang iassume na stalker ko
siya?
"O-okay."
Then the lift opened. Good thing it's still quarter to seven kaya wala pang tao.
Pumasok ako sa isang room, na I assume office ni Dane. Well, yes. I could see his
name carefully inscribed on the name plate, Nathaniel Dane Guzman, Operations
Manager. I frowned. He should be at least in the Senior position, right?
He sat on his swivel chair and motioned me to sit down. He placed his hands on his
chin. "What can you do?"
I can love you.
"Uhm, I could type?" I said, stupidest answer of them all!
He chuckled at my answer. Okay, I take it back. It's not stupid at all since I made
Dane laugh. "Yes, I know you could type. Let me rephrase, what do you want to do?"
His question was really vague. Ano nga ba ang gusto kong gawin? Does it even
matter?
"I'm your assistant, right? I could help you with your work."
"Tita Angel told me she doesn't want you running errands. I'm a busy person.
Magbantay ka na lang kaya sa office ko?"
I wanted to stomp my feet so hard. "No, of course I need to work. Ano'ng gagawin ko
sa office mo? Besides, hindi naman tatakbo yung office mo..."
He smiled, "alright then." He stood up and got his things, "Erika?" he said. I
looked up, pulling an attentive face. "Next time, dress appropriately. I need to
concentrate on my work."
I felt all my blood running on my face! Was he checking me out? If yes, then good!
"O-okay po."
He smiled and walked out of the door. I followed him. We went to the HR room. Hmmm.
I bought my iPad para I'll take down notes habang nagsasalita siya. I feel so
happy. Para kaming husband and wife!
He oriented the HR department about the new policies of the company. Masyado ngang
strict dito, tama si Kemp. Speaking of Kemp, nasan na kaya yung baklita na yun?
Well, malaki na siya, bahala na siya sa buhay niya.
After a couple of minutes, natapos na siya. Iba si Dane pag kausap ako, iba siya
pag kausap yung mga nagttrabaho. Strictly prefessional, that he is. I think he'll
be a very good business man.
Shortly after he finished briefing the HR department, we went back to his office.
He ordered food for the both of us! I'll admit, sobrang kinilig ako! Imagine, he's
my boss but he ordered food for me?
"Kain na," he said as he opened his food. He ordered chicked alfredo. I don't eat
chicken since ayoko na mga manok and ibon. But for him, sige na. I only ate the
pasta, medyo hindi ko kinain lahat ng chicken. Thank god may salad.
While eating, we made small talks. Most of the time, of course I'm the one
initiating.
"So, Dane... Girlfriend?" I finally asked after all those wishy washy questions
I've been throwing.
He raised a brow, "I have many girlfriends."
My jaw fell. 
"Wala naman ah!"
He gave me a cocky grin. "Bakit mo alam? Stalker ba kita?"
I raised my chin, "bakit flattered ka?"
I didn't know neither what I was saying nor what I was thinking. I didn't even know
where I got the courage to retort back! And... to flirt a little.
He shrugged, "of course. Having a pretty stalker is good for the ego."
Oh, god, Dane. Bakit ka ganyan? Mas lalo akong naiinlove!
"Sure, sure. Flatter yourself."
He smiled at me, "sure, I will."
We continued talking while eating. Hmmm, I can't see why Gabbie said that Dane's
weird annoying. All I could see was Dane sweet and caring.
"Dane, for real, wala ka nga talagang girlfriend?"
He gave that cold gaze. Suddenly, I felt chills crept up to my spine. "Why are you
so interested?"
"Just... harmless question," I said to hide the slight uneasiness I was feeling. 
"I have one, I think."
Ha? He thinks?
"We didn't really break up so I don't know if we're still together. I'll fill you
in once I talked to her."
Abruptly, I opened my d-amned mouth and cut him off. "No!" He looked at me with a
baffled expression on his face. "I mean, uhm, siguro break na kayo since hindi
naman kayo nag uusap, di ba?"
He nodded.
"So, I think that's cool. No, I mean, that prolly means wag ka ng mareach out sa
kanya. Madaming ginagawa sa company para magsayang ka pa ng time sa kanya, di ba?"
He shrugged, "alright."
Whoa! That was freaking close! I thought ipapahamak ako ng bibig ko!
//
AN: Tumblr account of Eydee's Stories on external link! Check it awttt

--- --- ---

Chapter 7
--
Chapter 7
"Staring at me won't get you anywhere, Erika," Dane said as he ran his eyes on the
papers he was asked to review. I flushed into a very deep shade of red. I didn't
know he saw me checking him out! I mean, I couldn't stray myself from the sight of
him concentrating on whatever he was reading. He looked downright sexy with his
eyes focused and his brows slightly creased. So much for me drooling over him, my
boss.
I shyly smiled and tried to concentrate on my own set of reports I need to review.
This summer job was hectic to say the least. My works always got their way to mess
up with my sleep. I almost didn't get the chance to have a peaceful slumber last
time. 
Dane dramatically waved his hands up in the air. "I'm beat. Labas tayo?" He asked,
looking at me.
Saying that I was shocked would probably be the biggest understatement of the year!
I was...  knocked over, with delight of course! Was he asking me to date him?
"As in... date date?" I asked him with a hint of naivety in my voice. Of course I
needed a fallback plan. What if he wasn't actually asking me out? I won't want to
lose my cool and look pathetic.
He shrugged. "Your call. Kanina pa kasi tayo nagbabasa dito. Wanna grab a bite?
Nagugutom na din kasi ako," he said as he pushed himself back on his chair and
stretched his arms. Was it me or was it really hot in the office with Dane looking
downright... edible?
I gave him an equal shrug and smiled. "Sure. Pagod na din kasi ako eh. San ba tayo
pupunta?"
He stood up and got his coat. He looked really, really sexy with his coat and tie.
Add to the fact that he always wear his hair sexy pushed back. That sight of him
always makes my knees go jelly.
He played with his keys while we were waiting for the lift to open. "I feel like
driving. San mo ba gustong pumunta?" Goodness! Was he asking me to ride in his
freaking car?!
"K-kahit saan..." I managed to say while silently hyperventilating. Nathaniel Dane
Guzman just officially invited me inside his car!
He crinkled his nose. "You're just like the girls I've dated before."
"Come again?"
"When I ask where do they wanna eat, they always say the same thing. Kahit saan,
anywhere with you."
I mentally slapped myself. Now I have to face the consequences of my rash behavior!
Dane would now see me as one of those girls he dated... wait, what? Dated?
Thank god the lift opened right in the moment when I was ready to pull off a scene
and to just stumble on the floor unconscious.
He pressed the ground floor button and I just kept on mentally reprimanding myself
how cheap I looked. We landed on the ground floor while I was still silently
battling if I should open the topic and ask him how many girls has he dated. Would
that make me look too nosy? Well, we have been working for couple of weeks already
and that means I have already consumed 270 hours of my moments with Dane. I still
have 730 hours remaining. Oh, I wish time would stop. I really enjoyed my stay so
far.
"If you don't mind me asking, ilang babae na yung nakadate mo?" I asked him without
hitching a breath.
He stared at me while clutching his hands on the steering wheel. I pushed myself
not to get distracted by how he looked so sexy while looking serious and holding
the steering wheel. He looked so dominant. "More than the calendar numbers, I
think. But I stopped dating 4 years ago. Why?"
My jaw fell. Why did Dane always has his way with words? He sounded like a
playboy... but he wasn't. I've been following him around. He didn't date anyone for
the past years. Maybe while he was in the States? 
"No, wala lang. I was just curious."
He smiled at me and started the engine. "You're really curious about me?" He
stated. I knew he would notice. I always asked him the most random questions just
so to know him better. I think he's beginning to be pretty annoyed by me. I opted
not to answer his statement and to remain silent and to enjoy this ride. "I'm glad
I'd dated enough when I was younger."
"Why? You could always date anyone..."
Even me.
He shook his head. "Nah, I'm good. I've had my fair share. I don't think I could
date anyone anymore."
"But why?" I almost shouted. D-amn!
He continued driving and stared right at the road. "Because... it's bad."
We arrived at the destination and plopped ourselves on the chair. I didn't push the
conversation further. It just annoyed me and made me curious as hell! Why won't he
date anybody as well as me?! Something's really wrong and I just wanna know what
was it! It killed me not knowing why.
The entire day went well. We worked together and flirted a little. I don't know if
it was just me or what... But I think Dane kinda likes me. He was just holding
himself back because of something I really wanna know what! He was a natural flirt,
that thing I'm quite sure. He has his suave way with words and it just comes
naturally like he was born to sweep girls off their feet. 
I parted ways with Dane and waited at the front of the building for my Dad's car.
He always picks me up since I don't really wanna drive, well, not really my dad,
just the driver. I heard a loud honk from and I knew who was inside the car.
"Need a ride?'
Vance. Great. I thought I was Vance free this summer.
I rolled my eyes and dismissed him using my hands but no luck. He was persistent
when he wanted to be. He went out of his car and stood beside me. "Come on, Riks.
Tagal nating hindi nagkita. Dinner?"
"I'm tired, and I know you're tired as well. Magpahinga na lang tayo," I said.
He placed his arms around me and subtly led me to his car. "Yeah, I'm tired but I
really missed you, Erika. Just this once, okay? Dinner's on me."
I eventually gave up. What could I do? I texted my dad that I would go home a
little late. Knowing Vance, I'm pretty sure kung saan saan pa ako dadalin nito.
We went to this posh place and ate dinner. Of course we talked. Felt like old, good
times.
"Heard you were doing a good job? Kamusta dun practicum?"
I almost choked. Vance immediately got me a glass of water. "Oh, dahan dahan lang
kasi," he said whilst caressing my back.
"Ikaw naman kasi! What's with the question?" I asked, nervously. 
He shrugged. "Nothing. Just checking the competition."
I rolled my eyes inwardly. "You know that there's no point in you competing against
Dane, right? You'll just end up losing, Vance." 
I tried my best to act as cruel as I could be. I don't see the point in playing
games with him and feeding him with sugarcoated lies. He needs to know his stance.
I don't like him the way he likes me. Never did, never will.
He smiled apologetically. And now, I'm the villain in my own story. "You'll retract
that one day." And my jaw fell again for the blank time this day! 
"Seriously? Please, Vance. Move on, move forward! Tutulungan pa kitang maghanap ng
bagong babae, just please leave me alone."
He shrugged and sliced whatever he was eating. "I don't know about that one, Riks.
Remember, sabi ni Dane you're good for me. I'm just following his advice."
And there, I rest my case. There's no point in aruguing with a person who lost all
his rationality and logic.
We finished eating up and he drove me home.
"Night, Riks."
"Whatever, d-umbass."
He said another good night but I ignored him and walked to our house. Today was so
stressful. I went to my room and stripped off my clothes and treated myself with a
very appealing bubble bath. As I let myself get emerged by the soothing feeling of
being together with the bubbles, I called Gabbie.
("Sup?")
"I have to ask something." She said yes and so I decided to ask her. "Did you eve
date Dane?"
I heard her choking from the other line. And when she recovered, ("what the hell?
Are you out of your mind?") she said, no, more like fumed.
"Yes, I'm about to lose my mind, thank you."
("Wait, ano bang meron?")
I told her about the weird playboy statements of Dane. I am seriously dying of
curiosity! Not knowing destroys my brain!
("Weird annoying, right? Well, I don't know but I think you should ask him. It's
not my story to tell.")
"Gabbie?"
("What?")
"Seriously, tell me!"
("I can't, okay? It's... complicated. Really complicated.")
"Why? It's not like he's wallowing because the one he loved died, right?"
("You know, what? I gotta go.")
Then the line went freaking dead and I just got freaking even more curious!

--- --- ---

Chapter 8
--
Chapter 8
A woman handed me a folder full of papers while she was pacing back and forth in
front of me. "These are the papers you need to review. The itinerary is also
included," she said while I opened the paper. Wow. Are we like having a vacation?
The itinerary includes beach resorts! "Since Mr. Guzman is the Operations Manager
and unfortunately," she said, emphasizing the word unfortunately. I immediately
raised a brow at her. Like, what the h-ell? She's like forty or something! Don't
tell me she has a thing for Dane? That's... disturbing! She continued, "you are his
assistant, you would come with him in Sortee. Two days and two nights. The hotel
accomodation and stuff are already there. Just review it for further reference,"
she said them stomped from the room.
Good thing I knew how to respect elder people bacause if not, I might have just
insulted the h-ell out of her. She's really ew. Dane and her? Was she mental? Ugh.
I decided to push the disturbing thought from my head and just concentrated on the
papers in front of me.
Business expansion, eh?
While reading the tons of paper in front of me, I felt the door slide. Finally,
Dane's here. I opted not to look and him, for a change, and just concentrated on
what I was reading. 
I heard him clear his throat. I decided to give it a go and acknowledge his
presence but... "Mr. Guzman," I said with a bit of trembling in my voice. Goodness!
My future-father-in-law was standing in front of me for a good five minutes and I
was ignoring him? What's wrong with me?
He smiled at me and motioned me to take a sit. I sat back on my chair while he
stood in front of me. He looked... a lot like Dane.
"Erika Garillo, right?" He asked. I nodded nervously. Gee! Calm down, Erika. He
won't eat you up alive. Loosen up a bit, will you? He sat on Dane's chair and
placed his hands on his chin. "So, you're my son's assisstant." 
I shyly nodded. Naivety suits me real fine.
"Thank you, Erika." He said. What's he thanking me for? "I know you don't know why
I am thanking you but, thank you. Since you came, Dane changed. A bit but still, he
changed."
I just gave him a small smile since I have no freaking idea why he was thanking me!
"Alam mo kasi, simula nung namatay si Felice, nagbago na si Dane," he said and he
definitely caught my attention! I felt my heart beating so fast that I thought it
would jump out of my chest! Gee, hold your horses right there, Erika! "It happened
four years ago pero wala pa ding nagbabago. I miss my son. Hindi na siya si Dane
simula ng namatay si Felice. I know this sounds selfish pero Erika, please don't
give up on my son. My wife and my daughter would really appreciate it kung babalik
na si Dane sa dati."
I was so overwhelmed by the trust Mr. Guzman was giving me. At least kahit konti,
alam kong may tiwala sila na kung anuman ang pinagdadaanan ni Dane, kaya ko siyang
tulungan. I know I could... if only he would let me to.
We were disturbed by his secretary. "Mr. Guzman, Mr. Palma is waiting for you," she
said. Mr. Guzman immediately stood up and faced me. "My daughter's fiance is
waiting for me. Maybe you could join us sometime for dinner," he politely said then
walked out the door. 
Did he just invite me to their house?!
I let my mind wander for quite some time. So my hunch's true. Felice, she's dead.
How could I compete with someone's who's already dead?
"Penny for your thoughts?" Dane said as he was walking towards his swivel chair. He
was adjusting his tie loose and was stretching a bit. Talk about self control,
Erika. How could I control myself if he would always look this hot?
I smiled at him and instead made a segue. "How was the meeting?"
He shrugged and then removed his tie. "Same old. Nakuha mo na ba yung memo?" He
asked me. I nodded since I already got the memo about our travel. We'll go to
Sortee tomorrow, only the two of us. And I was wondering if his Dad's behind this.
I mean, kami lang dalawa? As much as I want to think professionally, there's still
this part inside me na may malisya.
"Good. I'll pick you up tomorrow, sabay na tayong pumunta sa airport or what?"
I shook my head. "No, I'm fine. Sa airport na lang tayo magkita," I said. For the
first time, I declined. I didn't know why but prolly because I was still thinking
about Felice. Who the hell was that Felice? Felice what? Tss. I need to know things
about her. I must know who I'm against to.
We continued the day as usual. We worked and then checked the different
departments. Kung ganito talaga ang gagawin ko after kong grumaduate, then maybe I
don't want to graduate at all. I mean, this' seriously boring the h-ell out of me!
I was barely surviving because of Dane. But when I work in our company, with Angel
around, I don't think I would even last a day.
The day passed by so quickly and before I knew it, I was home. 
I rested for a bit and then went down for dinner. Hindi pa nga pala ako
nakakapagpaalam kay Dad. Knowing that he's super protective of me to the point that
it's killing me, I highly doubt he'll approve of this trip. But then, when did I
care?
"Good evening, Erika," Angel greeted. I smiled and sat down. Angel hasn't been
pestering me for days which I thought was a good sign. Has she finally grasped the
fact that I would never accept her?
We ate in silence. Since mom died, I stopped talking during dinner time. Back then,
dinner time was family time. We would talk about the things that happened during
the day and just have a pure laugh about it. I really miss my mom...
"I'll be gone for two days," I blurted out. Dad and Angel stopped eating and looked
at me. "What? It's work, okay? Professional matters."
Dad sighed. "Do you really need to go?" I nodded. "Fine. Sino ba ang kasama mo
jan?"
"Dane."
"No, Erika! Kayong dalawa lang?"
I nodded. "Gee, dad. I'm a working adult, okay? Besides, I'm almost 20. It's not as
if I'm some immature teenager. Calm down."
He took a glass of water and sipped it. Why do I have a very old fashioned father?
Remind me why.
My dad said a litany for about a good 15 minutes. It's composed of reasons why I
shouldn't go with Dane. Since I already mastered the skill of shutting people out,
I didn't even understand a word he said. I just sat there and comfortably ate my
food while he was blabbering nonsense.
I smiled and stood up. "The answer is still no, dad. I'd go whether you approve or
not."
I saw a vein on his neck protrude. I was shocked for a bit! I thought I just gave
my dad a heart attack! I calmed down for a bit after he was pacified.
"Dad, please don't make a big fuss about it. I have my life, okay? Don't always go
against my decisions if you don't want to see me moving out of this house you call
home."
I walked out and I swear I saw my father almost cry. Well, I don't know why but I'm
just like this. The moment my mom died, I stopped caring. Life is d-amn too short
to worry about other people. I need to worry about myself and my happiness. That's
all I care about.
I prepared a killer two piece for Dane. Time to show my strengths, Nathaniel. I
swear your eyes will jump out of its sockets when you see me flaunt my curves.
Since the night was still young and I already finished packing, I called out my
friends, Kemp, Jelly, and Janice. Wala kasi si Rusell. I don't know where he's and
I don't care. He has a life and so does I.
"Hi, bebe!" Kemp immediately hugged me upon my arrival. Even though we work in the
same company, we rarely see each other. That's how busy we were.
Janice and Jelly said their piece of greetings. We're here in a club down South. We
rarely go clubbing, well, I think this only applies to me. I don't like staying in
cramped up places. And I need to study, as well. But my friends? I could say they
party real hard. 
We walked through the crowd since the VIP place was across the dance floor. This
was precisely the reason I hate clubs, too crowded and full of perverted people!
Ugh! I swear someone squeezed my butt when I was walking! Son of a b-itch!
When we reached the VIP area, I was sweaty as h-ell. 
"Hey, Riks."
"Vance?! What are you doing here?" I asked him. Why's... he here?
Janice and Jelly shrugged. Ah, treachery! I sneered at Kemp. Itong baklita talaga
nito! Kemp raised his hands up in the air. "Don't be mad at me, bebe! Nakiusap kasi
si Vance and you know I can't resist him," he said and then hugged me. Kung hindi
ko lang mahal ang effem na 'to!
I rested my case. What more could I do? Nandito na eh. We sat down and they ordered
beers while I treat myself a glass of alcohol-free beverage. I'm not a good girl,
definitely not, but I don't drink. Alcohol burns in my throat and I don't like the
burning sensation it gives me whenever I drink one. So, definitely no alcohol for
me.
Kemp, Janice, and Jelly went to go dancing and me? I decided to stay. I just had my
butt felt by a random, perverted stranger! I won't take the risk to experience that
again. No, thanks.
"Cheers," he said and then clanked his bottle of beer with my glass of virgin coke.
I just gave him a blank stare. Hmm. Vance Emmanuel Marquez, why do you have to be
so d-amn handsome but so d-amn stupid at the same time?
I sipped my drink and just let the music drown me. I knew I needed to wake up early
but I couldn't bring myself to go home. No, not yet.
"I tried to follow your suggestion," Vance said. "I contacted Trisha, my ex. We
dated for at least three times again but you know what? I just discovered how I
love you so much."
I mentally rolled my eyes. No, not again. Of all the girls, why Trisha Lim? She's
annoyingly cute! She's too bubbly it's maddening!
"When we were having dinner, all my thoughts were about you, Riks. Have you eaten
yet, where are you now, what are you doing... It's all about you, Riks. It's crazy
how you're the only one I could think about," he confessed. If not for the dim
lights in the club, Vance would have probably seen my rotten-tomatoe-like face.
Sure, he always tells me how much he likes me but tonight was different...
Something's different.
I tried to divert my attention to the people who shamelessly grind with each other
on the dance floor. I spotted Kemp and he waved at me. That a-ss! How dare he dance
with a British hottie!
I decided to go to the powder room to freshen up but I saw Vance stood up and
walked towards me. No, this doesn't seem right.
With every step he made, I stepped back. 
"Vance..." I said with worry. He's drunk. He cornered me on the wall, his hands
were on the side of my face and his face was dangerously close. Too close for my
liking...
He caressed my face using the back of his hand and invaded my personal space even
more. I could almost hear my heart beat in my chest. I closed my eyes and pray that
he would stop.
His lower lip was almost touching my upper lip, I let out a gasp. No, this can't be
happening again! I tried to push him back but that made him yearn for closeness
even more. He claimed my lips... and like before, I gave in.
I knew this was wrong. I don't love him like I do with Dane but Vance? He's a
special case. I could always reject him but when he kiss me, all my walls come
crashing. The first time he kissed me, I almost gave myself to him that's why I
hated him for so long! He used me. That was when Trisha and him broke up. He came
to me crying and then I comforted him like a best friend would do... But then he
stared at me like I'm the most beautiful thing in the world and he kissed me... And
then I just found myself rolling in the bed with him. Ugh! I hated him so much for
that! And that Trisha Lim, as well. It's their fault I almost gave myself to this
man!
We both gasped for air and broke the heart-wrecking kiss. 
I slapped him.
I tried to walked out but he grabbed my arm. "You like me, Erika. Maybe not as much
as Dane but you like me."
"And so?" I said as I tried to get his hands off of my arm.
"I'll hold onto that like and make it love."
I walked out and called for a cab. I really hate Vance! Ugh! Why was he doing this
to me?

--- --- ---

Chapter 9
--
No proof reading. Feel free to tell me my errors. :D
//
Chapter 9
"Gee, I thought I'll get to relax for a while only to get disappointed," I said as
I slumped back on the chair. We're here in an empty space which is 45 minutes away
from Sortee. We arrived here earlier today and as soon as I felt the white sand on
my strappy sandals, Dane dragged me to this empty piece of land. Apparently, they
were planning to expand their business since this place is already a developing
province. As the saying goes, opportunity only knocks once. So as soon as they
found out about this, they grabbed the opportunity and so here we were, planning
about possible establishments that could be placed in here.
Dane was busy taking snap shots and I made myself comfortable on the chair. I took
my phone out to get myself busy. Boredom is nearly killing me!
"Ugh!" I groaned in frustration. Walang signal! Where were we? In some strange,
deserted place?
Dane seemed to notice my irritation. He put down his camera, rather his much loved
SLR, and looked at me. "Problema mo?" He asked.
I really don't wanna show him my bratinella side since I know that that would scare
him off. Yes, I am a brat and I have my own way to get the things that I wanted. I
throw fits and scare people off... well, sometimes. I stopped doing those things
ages ago. I'm trying to renew myself.
I showed him my phone. "No signal, no 3G, no everything!"
He chuckled at my dismay. "Chill, Erika. When we get back at the hotel, you could
have all evening browsing the net or talking with your friends. Just relax for
now," he said, reassuring me. I smiled at him even though he couldn't see me
smiling. It's just amazing how he could pacify me when I'm in the middle of my
moments.
We stayed there for another good hour. When Dane was satisfied with all the photos
he took, we began to walk back to our car. It took us about 30 minutes to get into
this place. Believe me when I say that this is one undeveloped, strange place.
"I talked to your father," I said to him. Well, we have a long road ahead of us so
why don't we shorten the trip by chatting?
He nodded. "Bakit daw?"
"Well, for once, he thanked me," I mentioned. I said that to him since I wanna know
why his father was thanking me. I mean, I don't even see anything changing when it
comes to Dane. He's still as vague as he could be.
"Then you should've said you're welcome."
"Geez. Tatawa na ba ako?" I retorted. He chuckled. Gee, Dane, stop chuckling!
Nakakainis eh, sobrang cute, I wanna kiss him but I know I can't.
"Sorry," he said after chuckling. Now, he's back to his serious aura. "Why did he
thank you?"
I shrugged. "I don't know. But... it has something to do about you."
He stopped in his tracks.
"Erika, don't involve yourself in this matter. What's done is done. Wala ng
mababago. If any of my family member speaks to you again, tell me at once," he said
then stormed off. I was taken aback by the hostility he showed me. Did he just
shout at me?
I ran to follow him but I lost him. God! I looked at the sky, uulan pa yata. Great.
Just freaking great.
I tried to call him but I couldn't reach him. Oo nga pala, wala nga palang signal!
God! Ano na ang mangyayari sa akin? Would I die here in the middle of nowhere?
After all the s-hits, dito lang din ako mamamatay? Probably to be discovered after
months pag nagsimula na yung development ng land at unfortunately, pag completely
decomposed na ang body ko!
I sat under one of the big Acacia tree. I just wish that Dane would go back and
look for me. I mean, he's not that heartless naman para iwanan akong mag isa dito,
di ba?
Suddenly, I felt a drop of rain on my hand. Uulan pa yata... At mag isa pa ako...
How unfortunate could I get?
I played with my phone to divert my attention. Truth was, I was scared... I don't
want to be alone. Being alone scares the living lights out of me.
"San ka ba nagpupunta?" I heard him say. Nagulat ako. He hugged me. He hugged me!
I took the opportunity and hugged him back. I was sniffing so hard. I don't wanna
look weak in front of him but I was really scared. Akala ko iniwan niya ako...
"Bakit bigla kang nawala?" He asked me. His face was etched with worry.
I tried to calm down myself. "I tried to follow you but I l-lost track..."
He breathe in and ran his hands through his hair. "I'm sorry, okay?" He grabbed my
hand. "Tara na, maggagabi na..." 
We walked while he was holding my hand. I suddenly felt safe. He's with me. Why did
I even doubt him? I knew he's not that kind of man who would leave girls in the
middle of nowhere. He's far better than that...
Nakarating kami sa sasakyan niya. He gave me his extra jacket. Since medyo umuulan,
basa na yung buhok ko. I think I'll be sick tomorrow.
"Suot mo," he said. He got a spare towel in the compartment of his car and brushed
the drips of water on my face. "Next time, wag mo ng gawin yun. I was worried
sick."
I blushed with the words that he said... Was he worried about me?
He continued, "pano kung may nangyaring masama sa'yo? Ano'ng gagawin ko?"
I didn't know where I got the courage but I kissed him.
"I'm safe, Dane... Stop worrying."
I saw hesitation in his eyes, like he's holding something back.
I took the initiative and kissed him again.
I looked him in the eye and told him, "please, kiss me..."
I saw him grunt and the next thing I knew, he was kissing me. No reservations, no
hesitations.

--- --- ---

Chapter 10
--
Chapter 10
"Mmm," I mumbled while Dane was biting my lower lip. I don't know what made me do
this but I kissed Dane!
Maybe I was sick from all the drama I've had since my mom died that I just snapped
and kissed Dane? I don't know why but there's something that made me kiss him. When
I saw hesitation in his eyes, hope sprung from the bottom of my heart. Maybe
there's still a chance? Maybe I could pull him from whatever's holding him back?
I let my hands wander through his hair. Oh, I've dreamt of this moment for so long.
How our first kiss would be like, where it would happen, how would I react. But
indeed it's true when they said that perfect moments are the ones unplanned.
Because now, my uplanned kiss with Dane would probably the highlight of my
existence!
Dane broke the kiss, leaned his forehead on my forehead and just stared at my face.
His lips was still red and sore from all the kissing.
"Sorry," he said, looking like he just woke up from a very bad dream!
I gave him a blatantly annoyed look. "What?"
He sighed, moved away from me, got the extra towel, wiped his face drenched from
the water rain and said, "that should've not happened."
I laughed at him sarcastically. Oo, hindi pa kami masyadong magkakilala ni Dane
para mag inarte ako ng ganito but god, this is seriously bulls-hit!
"You kissed me... and you liked it, Dane! Now, why are you acting like you're sorry
it even happened?" I exclaimed. I'm already feeling bad and I'm starting to feel
sick and my disappointment from Dane is only making it worse.
He didn't even look at me and just placed his hands on the steering wheel. "I
can't, okay? Can't you see me? I'm a mess, Erika! I'm a mess!"
I placed my hand on his arm. "You're not a mess, Dane."
He shook his head. "No, I'm a mess, Erika. You don't even know me a bit.
Maddisappoint ka lang pag nakilala mo ako," he said then immediately started the
ignition of the car.
I opted to stay silent and quietly sob. I squished myself on the side of the car,
obviously avoiding any skin contact. I'm very disappointed with myself. Why did I
even kiss him? What was I thinking? Na kapag hinalikan ko siya, magiging kami na
magically? Did I forget that it's Dane I'm in love with? That he's not an ordinary
man. He's probably the most complicated man I would ever know. He's sweet, he's
cold; he talks, he ignores; he kisses me, he's sorry for it; I'm bad for him, I'm
good for Vance. He's many things I know would hurt me! But no matter how I push
this thought from my head, I just can't seem to grasp the idea that Dane would be
the destruction of me. I just keep on going near him... He's my personal brand of
ecstacy and I'm addicted to him. And I absolutely have no plans for withdrawal.
We arrived at Sortee, with neither one of us talking. 
"Here's your key," he said then handed me the key.
He started walking but I stayed. I wanna be alone for now. I'm so disappointed with
myself!
I went to the bar and ordered myself a drink. I know I don't drink but tonight is
an exemption! Alam niyo kung bakit ako nagkakaganito? Because I know there's this
little part of Dane that loves me back. He kissed me back, for heaven's sake! And
what makes me so mad? It's the fact that he's hiding something from me, something
that holds him back! Was it Felice? That d-amned Felice! Patay na nga, nanggugulo
pa! Can't she just rest in peace and let Dane be happy with me?
I sipped the rhum but I was instantly disgusted with the taste! 
I pushed the glass away from me and listened to the song the band was playing.
"I thought you're already asleep, bakit ka nandito?" I heard him say. I wanna roll
my eyes so badly kaya lang naalala ko na boss ko nga pala siya. I just always keep
my respect intact.
"Bad night calls for a drink," I said then motioned the glass of rhum in front of
me.
"You were drinking?"
I rolled my eyes, I couldn't help it! "Correction, I am still drinking," I told him
even though I haven't even finished my first glass. Would it hurt kung magpapanggap
akong lasing?
He stood up and grabbed my arms. "Then you're probably drunk. Come, dadalin na kita
sa kwarto mo," he said.
I brushed his hand from my arms. "Ano ba, Dane! I told you, bad night! Just leave
me alone!" I told him off. Truth is, I don't want him to go. Kahit na mag away
kami, I don't care. Ang gusto ko lang, kasama ko si Dane. I know, pathetic. 
He sighed. "Fine, I 'll stay."
"Why are you so worried?"
"Because you came here with me. You're my responsibility," he stated.
I mocked him. "So, when I kissed you, you felt responsible so you kissed me back?
Ganun ba?"
He seemed frustrated with me but he didn't reason with me. I'm sorry, Dane. I'm
this handful. Sorry kung ngayon mo lang nakikita yung side ko na 'to.
"You're drunk, Erika," he just said.
I smirked. "I'm drunk but I still have my reasons with me, Dane."
He ordered a whisky for himself. He drank the whole glass in one gulp. Wow. "You're
drunk so I'll humor you," he said then grabbed my face and kissed me lightly on the
lips. "I kissed you back because I feel like kissing you. Ano ba yung mahirap
intindihin dun?" he said.
I need to backup my story so I made my eyes look dreamy, the way Jelly's eyes look
when she's absurdly drunk. "So, that's it? You felt nothing? It was a d-amned spur
of the moment?!"
He got another drink for himself. "No, okay. I liked it. Ano, masaya ka na?"
My heart instantly fluttered at his response. So... he liked the kiss.
I smiled at him. "Yes." But then, I remembered that d-amned Felice! "Dane..." I
called out his name. He thinks I'm drunk so maybe, if he gets angry, he'll forgive
me because I was drunk and out of my rationale? "Who's Felice?" I asked him, with
my eyes closed and my heart racing so wildly.
He gave out a bitter smile and got another drink. Maybe he's already drunk himself?
"Felice?" He smirked. "She ruined me..." That's all I got from him because he stood
up and left me hanging.
I got my things and stood up as well. Naglakad ako papunta sa hotel room ko ng
makita ko si Dane malapit sa shore. I slowly walked towards him. I think he didn't
notice my arrival since the waves were really rough tonight.
He was not sobbing nor sniffing but I was certain that I saw a tear fell from his
eyes.
I placed my hand on his shoulder to let him know that I'm here, he could talk to
me...
He looked at me and then he wiped the tear on his cheek. "Bakit ka nandito? You're
drunk. Pumasok ka na," he said, motioning his hand towards the hotel. I shook my
head and then he sighed. He sat on the sand and so did I.
"You're drunk, right?" he asked.
I shook my head but nevertheless acted like I'm freaking intoxicated.
He chuckled. "Since you're drunk, kkwento ko sa'yo si Felice..."
My heart was beating dangerously. Finally, makikilala ko na din siya. The great
Felice.
He played with the sand on his hand. "Si Felice, she's my first love... my first
kiss... but she's not my first girlfriend. I asked her to be my girlfriend bago ako
pumunta ng States but she dumped me." He looked up in the sky and smiled. He patted
my head and pulled me up. "That's all for now. Tara, pasok na tayo."
I didn't push it through. Tama na yung narinig ko. First love? How could I even
compete with that?! Maliban na lang kung... true love ako?
//
AN: Dito, si Dane ay 22, si Erika ay 19 almost 20. Therefore, si Alys ay 26. Gets?
Sobrang layo ng time nito sa SDP. :D
Hindi si Lynne si Felice, kkk? Magkaiba sila. Wag niyong igaya si Andy kay Dane.
LOL
xx

--- --- ---

Chapter 11
--
Chapter 11

"Ugh!" I said as I mess my hair. Today's not a good day. No, it's not because I
have a freaking hangover. I didn't even get to finish my first glass of alcohol!
It's because... I idled the whole night.

Plently scenarios played on my mind. Kung ano ba ang meron sa kanila ni Felice, if
he really loved her, or worst, if he still loves her! If he still does, ano'ng
laban ang meron ako? I know for a fact na mahirap kalaban ang first love, what more
yung patay na? How on earth would I compete with someone who's already enjoying her
stay six feet under?!

I felt the someone sat beside me. "Hangover?"

I shrugged. I acted like I was drunk last night so might as well act like I'm
having a brain-buzzling hangover. 

He stood up and bought a bottled water and got an aspirin out from his pockets.
"Here, inumin mo," he said as he open the bottled water.

"Thanks," I uttered. Hindi naman siguro ako magkakaroon ng side effects sa pag inom
ko ng aspirin despite na wala naman akong hang over, di ba? Oh, well. I lied so I
should be ready for the consequences. 
He smiled at me. "You look really messed up right now, Erika," he said with that
annoying but really cute amusement on his face.

I gave him a sarcastic smile. "Gee, thanks ha!"

He chuckled at my response. He got his phone from his pocket and checked his
schedule. Yeah, kahit na assistant niya ako, he still doesn't let me handle his
appointments. I don't know if he's obsessive compulsive like that or he just
doesn't trust me with his schedule. But that's the least on my priority list right
now. 

"I already finished the paper works last night. Gala tayo ngayon?" he asked with
that jaw dropping smile of his. 

"You finished?" I said with a bewildered face. No way! That was ton of paperworks!
Ano yun? Sobrang bored niya last night na ginawa niya lahat yun?

He smiled. "Yup. I was up all night."

And now, I figured I'm right. Nathaniel Dane Guzman is a freaking demi-god. How
could someone look so handsome without even sleeping the night before?! Ako nga na
napuyat lang kagabi, mukhang messed up na, siya naman, still handsome as ever!

I shook my head with my realizations. "You're... a workaholic."

He gave me a chuckle as a response. "D-amn right you are. But for now, let's go?"
he said then stood up.

I was about to stand up but then I remembered that I look horrible right now.
"Dane, I can't go."

"Huh? Why?"

"You said I look messed up, right? And I can't go around looking that messed up," I
explained.

He sat down again and stared at me. "Ang cute mo. Okay lang yan, gwapo naman ang
kasama mo, hindi na nila mapapansin na may panda eyes ka," he said.

My jaw just fell. He just showed me his narcissistic side!

He tugged me in the arms and so I followed him. Grabe. Dane is so... weird. And
unpredictable.

We went to his car and stroll on the place. Grabe! This is heaven on earth! I
swear, once matapos ang pinapagawang resort nila Dane, I'll beg my dad para magpa
member. I'll be spending my holidays here. 

"Dane, gusto ko dun!" I said, pointing on the couple bicycle.

He rolled his eyes at me. "Erika, alas dos ng hapon. Gusto mo bang magka skin
cancer tayong dalawa?"

I frowned. Oo nga naman, bakit hindi ko naisip yun? Masyado talagang matalino si
Dane! 

Naglakad na lang kami sa pathway. Hmmm. Kahit naman pala province dito sa Sortee,
marami na ding mapaglilibangan. Ang ganda ng park nila dito! Complete with the
dirty ice cream vendors, bicycles for rent, balloon and toys vendor, pati mga
street foods! But then, I don't eat street foods. I'm not picky with what I eat but
I just don't wanna eat those. I won't risk my health just to try those weird
looking food.

"Dane, do you eat street foods?" I asked him even though I don't know why.

He looked at me with a weird expression on his face. "Huh?"

"I said, do you eat street foods?"

He shook his head.

"Bakit naman hindi? I heard masarap daw sila!" I said as if nakakain na ako nun.

"Then let them eat those. Should I eat those just because they're eating those?"

Here he's again with his reasoning. I think he should continue his studies in Law
school. He'll make a very good lawyer!

I rolled my eyes at him. "Sabihin mo, maarte ka lang. Rich kid."

He laughed at my face. "Are you seriously mocking me? Bakit mahirap ka ba?"

I gave him a straight face. "No, I'm not poor but I'm not maarte."

He laughed at me. 

"Hey! Why are you laughing?"

He's still laughing but then he forced himself to stop since hinampas ko siya. "S-
sorry. I just remembered someone. Ang conyo mo kasi," he said.

"Sino naman ang naalala mo?"

He smiled bitterly. "Wala."

I frowned. "Secrets again? Thought we're friends?"

"We are?" he asked.

"Yes! You hugged me yesternight. Strangers don't hug each other!"

He chuckled. "Fine, we're friends."

I smiled victoriously. "Now, sino nga yung naalala mo?"

He seemed walking down his memory lane. Sino ba kasi yung naalala niya? I hope it's
not a girl! Hindi pa nga tapos ang laban ko with Felice, madadagdagan na naman?!

"Si Ally."

"Ally?"

"Yes, si Allison."

"Who's Allison?"

He looked at me. "You really wanna know?"

Suddenly, I felt scared. Do I really wanna know? I feel like I don't wanna. I'm
scared. Nagsisimula pa lang kami maging friends, it's not healthy para magkaroon ng
complications. Maybe I'll ask about her someday, pag matibay na ang foundating ng
friendship namin...

I shook my head. "No, next time na lang, prolly."

He smiled at my response. "Yes, maybe next time."

Since the mood's so awkward after the Ally talk, I challenged him to eat street
food! Just to kill time and honestly, nacucurious na din ako. Ano kaya ang lasa
nun? Oh, well. May doctor naman siguro sa hotel kung magkasakit kami ni Dane sa
gagawin namin.

"Omg, Dane! Hahaha!" I laughed so hard. May mga black things sa ngipin niya. This
is so freaking funny!

He smiled even bigger nung nakita niyang tumatawa ako. Nasan ang weird annoying na
sinasabi ni Gabbie? Ang adorable kaya ni Dane!

"What? You find this funny?" sabi niya then he went near me and tickled me.

"Hahaha! Dane, stop it!" I said in between laughs. Grabe! Ayoko ng kinikiliti ako!
I'm so sensitive!

Good thing malayo kami sa mga tao. We took the food we bought then we made
ourselves comfortable on the concrete bench. 

I'm still laughing uncontrollably and Dane's still tickling me kaya napahiga ako sa
bench.

We gazed at each other's eyes and the next thing I knew, Dane kissed me on the
cheeks.

"Tara na sa hotel? Gusto kong magtoothbrush," he said. 

I laughed at him. 

We went back at the hotel and walked our separate ways. Imagine, we only stayed
here for two days and three nights but I fell in love even harder. Is that even
possible?

//
AN: Malapit ng magkaron ng FB sila Dane, Erika at Vance. Watch awwwt! =))
No proof reading. Help me, grammar Lords.
xx, Eydee

--- --- ---

Chapter 12
--
Chapter 12

"I missed you," I uttered to my bed. I rolled over several times. Grabe! Kahit na
two nights lang ako nawala sa bahay, I couldn't deny how I missed this place! Of
course, nothing beats your own home!

I felt my phone vibrate. I checked it and I saw Kemp's name on the caller ID. Hmm.
"Hello," I said.

("Hi, bebe! I missed you! Nakabalik ka na ba sa house?")

"Yup. Just arrived. Why?" I asked, of course. He wouldn't call me for nothing. I
know that he needs something from me. Yeah, Kemp's a bit of a user but what could I
do? I love this effem to bits!

("Punta ka naman dito sa Rockwell, please?")

"Seriously? I just arrived home and there you are, bad influencing me!" I gritted
through the line.

("Bebe naman, you're so scary!! Kasi naman, birthday ni papable Vance ngayon, hindi
mo man lang na remember! Punta ka na dito, please?")

I sighed. Stupid Erika. How did I ever forget Vance's birthday? Am I this
insensitive?

("Hello? Are you still there?")

"Uh, yes. Uhm, Kemp?"

("Yes, bebe?")

"Tell him I said happy birthday. Sige, good night," I said then cut the line before
he could even say another thing.

I slumped back on my bed. No matter how hard I try to convince myself that what I
am doing is all for Vance's benefit, still, I couldn't help but feel bad. Of
course, I would feel bad! He's my best friend. Kahit na may gusto sa akin yun and I
abhore it, I still love him and care for him. He's been with me for like forever.
And I am thankful for that. Pero kasi... if I show up in his party, then baka
isipin niya may chance. I don't wanna lead him on. Cutting him off like this would
stop prolonging his agony.

--
"Good morning," I said as I sat on the chair. Breakfast with dad and Tita Angel
means today is nonetheless another ordinary day.

I got myself bacons and egg on my plate. Good thing walang work ngayon. I mean,
Dane and I lang pala since we worked extra hours sa Sortee. Well, si Dane lang pala
kasi natapos niya na yung project namin. Seems like natuwa si Mr. Guzman sa
proposal na ginawa ni Dane so he gave us both a free day. Nabawasan na naman ng 9
hours yung oras ko kasama si Dane kahit na hindi kami magkasama ngayon. Crap.

"Erika," my dad said.

"Hmm?"

"Clear your schedule."

"Why?" I asked even though my schedule has been cleared prior.

He held Tita Angel's hand and looked at me. Okay? "We'll visit Angel's daughter."

I rolled my eyes. "Dad, seriously? I don't even know her!"

Dad reprimanded me. Bakit ba siya nagagalit? Kung hindi ko free day ngayon at may
trabaho talaga ako, would he require me to clear my schedule to visit some dead
person? For heaven's sake, I didn't even see her when she was still alive! What
difference would it make kung makita ko ang tomb niya?

He took a deep breath. "Erika Garillo, as your father, clear up your schedule, I am
asking you."

I measured up to his gaze. "Give me one good reason."

He slightly massaged his temple. "Because she's---"

He didn't finish what he was saying since Angel cut him off. She looked at him and
shook her head. So, ano ngayon? Clueless ako?

"Don't," she said to dad and then looked at me. "Hindi ba talaga pwede, Erika?"

Oh, gee. Since I am feeling good today, I nodded. "Fine. Ano'ng oras ba tayo
aalis?"

She smiled at me and mouthed me a 'thanks.' I smiled a bit. Truth is, I'm starting
to like Tita Angel. She's not mean to me, in fact, she's really nice. I was such a
b-itch to her because... she was my mom's best friend. I mean, I have all the
reasons to hate her. But like a pest that she used to be, she crawled her way to my
heart. I know I'm not kind but I don't wanna be mean. So ngayon, I'll start to
soften up to her. She deserves it, at least.

We ate in silence and then I went upstairs. Mamayang hapon pa naman pala kami
pupunta sa anak ni Tita Angel. I still have all morning for myself.

From: Dane Guzman

Good morning.

Gee, calm down, Erika! No, I couldn't! I squealed as loud as I could and then I
pacified myself. My fingers were trembling kaya naghintay ako ng ilang minutes bago
ako nakapagcompose ng decent message.

To: Dane Guzman

Good morning, too!

There. Hindi mukhang desperate yung text ko. I don't wanna come off as a s-lutty
person. 

We exchanged texts for an hour. Grabe. Are we... getting at it? I mean, we kissed
for about four times already then now, we're exchanging sms. Ano na ba kami?

Oh, I suddenly remembered my conversation with Vance.

-flashback-

"Ugh..." I uttered. 'Who the h-ell would call this time of the day?!' I thought as
I reach the phone on top of my nightstand. I answered it without looking at the
caller ID.

"Hello?"

("Erika...") 

Napaupo ako. Si Vance.

"V-Vance..."

He chuckled. He's drunk. ("Buti naman naalala mo pa ako.")

I heaved a sigh. "Vance, you're drunk. Itulog mo na lang yan, ha?"

("I love you, Erika. Damn, ayoko na eh! Lagi mo na lang akong g-inagago pero bakita
mahal pa din kita?!")

I heard him sob. I'm sorry, Vance. Please don't cry...

"Vance naman... Matulog ka na, please? Mag usap na lang tayo bukas."

("No, Erika. Please don't hang up on me...") he said and then I heard him sniff.
God, what have I done? Not once in my life narinig ko si Vance like this. So
helpless... ("Tapos na yung birthday ko... Ni ha, ni ho, wala akong narinig galing
sa'yo. I should be discouraged by now pero ano? Mas nasasaktan ako, mas minamahal
kita. T-angina ang g-ago ko talaga! Bakit ba kasi sa lahat ng babae, ikaw pa?! Alam
ko naman na hindi mo ako seseryosohin eh. Buhay naman oh!") 

I tried so hard not to cry. Hindi dapat ako panghinaan ng loob. Dapat lang mafeel
ni Vance na hindi ko siya gusto. Oo, gusto ko siya but I know myself too well. I
don't love him. Si Dane ang mahal ko. 

"Tigilan mo na ako, Vance. There's Trisha. Sa kanya ka na lang," I said through

gritted teeth. Much as I hate Trisha's guts, mas okay na siguro na siya na lang.
Wag na ako, please...
 
He laughed. ("Erika, I never loved Trisha! Ano ba ang hindi mo gets dun? I didn't
love her and she didn't love me. We used each other. Ikaw nga yung mahal ko eh!
Bakit ba lagi mo na lang akong tinutulak sa iba?!")
 
"Look, Vance, I'm sorry. I can't do this anymore. I'm hanging up."
 
I was about to hang up but I still heard what he said. ("I love you... so much that
it hurts...")

-present-

I dressed up since inaya ako ni Dane maglunch. Yes. My plan's finally taking
effect. My friends say that I don't love Dane, that I'm just obsessed with him. H-
ell, what do they know? They don't know a thing. I love Dane. Even if I'm a messed
up person, with Dane,  feel complete. 

"Dad, I'll be back after lunch," I said and then I didn't even bother wait for his
reply. Apparently, he also took this day off. Bakit ba napakaimportante naman yata
nung anak ni Tita Angel, lahat kami kailangan free today?

Nakarating ako sa meeting place namin. Nagpahatid ako sa driver. Hmm. Maybe I
should learn how to drive na. 

I saw Dane on the right side of the resto. Of course, he still looks good as ever.

"Hi," I said as I sit down on the chair in front of him.

He gave me a smile. "I already ordered."

I raised a brow. "What if hindi pala ako kumakain ng inorder mo?"

He shrugged. "Beats me."

I chuckled. Ang cute ni Dane! "You know I'm a picky eater. What made you order food
without my permission?"

"Wala lang. I figured you'll say that kaya ginawa ko. I like playing games with
you," he said. I was taken aback by what he said. The kiss, the hugs, the sweet
gestures... lahat ba yun, laro para sa kanya?

He seemed to have noticed my reaction so he snapped a finger in front of me. "Hey."

"Uh, sorry for idling," I said then offered a small smile. 

"No prob. Sorry for dragging you here. I know today's a free day pero..." he
stopped midway.

"Pero ano?"

He gave me a bitter smile. "Today's a horrible day. Will you spend it with me?"

I decided to say yes. Dane needs me now. I can feel it. His eyes... sobrang
lungkot. Siguro naman maiintindihan nila dad kung sasabihin kong may emergency kaya
hindi ako makakapunta sa anak ni Tita Angel? Minsan lang magconfide si Dane sa
akin... I should grab this chance.

After eating, Dane brought me to their house. Of course I was shocked! Bakit niya
ako dinala sa bahay?!

Bago bumama sa sasakyan niya, he looked at me. "Look, my sister has been bugging me
nonstop. Gusto ka daw niyang makita. Will you humor her?"

I blushed at the thought. Gusto niya akong makita? Gusto niya ba ako for Dane?

I nodded.

"She's a pain in the a-ss but my sister's really nice."

I smiled at him. "I know. Tara na?"

He gave out a heavy breath and then opened the door of his car. Sabay kaming
pumasok. Guzman's Manor. Who would have thought that one day, I'll be able to step
inside this?

My eyes roamed around their house. Typical house, I mean, I grew up around rich
people. Things like these don't fascinate me anymore. Naglakad kami papunta sa
receiving area nila.

"Dane!!" I saw a girl running towards Dane. Siguro siya si Alys?

She threw herself at Dane. "Ugh. Ano ba, Alys?" Dane irritably said and then he
tried to get Alys off of him.

"Grabe, namiss lang naman kita eh!" she said and then pouted.

"Then ditch your condo and get back here. Daming arte," sabi ni Dane. Ang cute
niyang mairita!

Hindi na siya pinansin ni Alys. "Hey, you're Erika, right? My name is Alys," she
said and then offered her hands. I took it and then we shook hands. "Did you eat
lunch na? Si Dane kasi eh!" she said and then glared at Dane.

"Shut up, Alys. Don't pester Erika."

"Tsk. Erika, tara, dessert, gusto mo?"

Hindi na ako nakasagot kasi hinatak na ako ni Alys papunta sa dining area nila.
Sobrang energetic ni Alys! To think na ikakasal na siya, right? I once heard Mr.
Guzman saying that eh. Ah, nakita ko na nga din pala yung groom ni Alys. He seems
nice. 

Nagsalita lang ng nagsalita si Alys habang kumakain ako ng strawberry shaved ice.
Ang dami niyang kwento unlike Dane! Nung umalis si Dane para magbihis, she went
near me.

"Thank you, Erika."

"Huh?"

She smiled at me. "For being with him today. Today is a terrible day. Accompany
him, please? He needs all the support he can get."

--- --- ---

Chapter 13
--
Chapter 13

"Pinapabigay ng human resource team," Dane said then may itinambak, yes, the term
is right, may itinambak siyang mga papel sa desk ko. Oh, believe me I ain't kidding
when I said the word 'mga.'

My eyes jumped out of their sockets upon seeing the papers I was supposed to
review. "You're serious?"

He winked at me. "No kidding when it comes to business, Erika. I'll date you later
if you wrap that up."

And after hearing that very tempting reward, I forced myselfto finish reviewing the
papers on my desk. 

I was religiously reviewing the papers when Dane's phone rang. Being a curious
person that I naturally am, I listened to their conversation, although it's only
one way since I can't hear what the other person's saying.

"What? Are you for real, kuya Andrei?"

"No, no. Of course I still care but you know about my situation, right?"
"Aish. Stubborn girl."
"No, no. Please look after her. I know you have work and Tita Glorie but please,
kuya? Will you look after her for me?"
"Of course, that would do. Thanks, kuya. I owe you one."
"Alright, I'll tell dad and mom you said hi. Regards to tita Glorie, aright? Bye."

When he hang up, I immediately resumed to my work. Hindi naman yata niya napansin
na nag eavesdrop ako since parang bothered siya sa sinabi nung kausap niya.

He suddenly slumped back on his chair and messed his hair. What's wrong, Dane?
"Ugh!" he grunted.

Ano bang iniisip mo, Dane? Parang sobrang bigat ng iniisip niya. Bakit ganun? Kahit
na matagal na kaming magkasama ni Dane, hindi ko pa din siya maintindihan. Para
siyang isang puzzle na sobrang hirap buuin. Ang daming mysteries na bumabalot sa
kanya...

He stood up and got his coat. Hindi ako nakapagsalita kasi halatang sobrang
frustrated siya sa sinabi nung tao sa kabilang line. Sino ba kasi yung kausap niya?

Without a single explanation, he stormed out of the room.

Naiwan akong mag isa sa office niya. Naisip ko lang, worth it ba lahat ng pinag
gagagawa ko for Dane? Last night, sobrang disappointed ni dad kasi instead na
tumupad ako sa pangako ko sa kanya na pupunta ako sa tomb ng anak ni Tita Angel,
mas pinili kong sumama kay Dane. He needed me... Kahit na sobrang disappointed ni
Dad, I shrugged it off because I think his disappointment was worth it. I thought
na finally, nag oopen up na si Dane. But then, maybe I thought wrong. 

--
"Here's it," I said as I gave the report sa head ng HR. Medyo masakit yung kamay ko
kasi chineck ko isa isa yung paper. Nakakatamad talagang maging office girl. Bakit
nga ba kasi ito ang napili kong field? Mas okay yata na nagmodel na lang ako, mas
interesting.

"Milk tea?"

Napahawak ako sa dibdib ko kasi nakatayo pala si Dane sa likod ko. "You shocked
me," I said.

He gave me that timid smile. "I'm sorry. You're done with the reports?" I nodded.
"Tara, I'll date you."

The frown on my face suddenly disappeared and a smile took its toll. "Sure. I'll
just collect my things."

I went to his office and got my things. I fixed myself as well since when I'm with
Dane, I always need to be my best. Napag alaman ko kasi na madaming nagkakagusto sa
kanya sa company na 'to. Not that I am blaming those girls... Well, I am blaming
them. Hindi pa ba obvious na sa akin si Dane?

He gave me my milk tea and then sabay kaming pumasok sa lift. Ang awkward ng
atmosphere. Gustung gusto ko talagang tanungin kung sino yung kausap niya kanina
pero nahihiya ako. Masyado yatang nosy pag ganun. Hindi pa kasi kami dumadating sa
point na no secrets.

Finally, nakarating na kami sa ground floor. Nag abang kami sa entrance kasi
pinakuha niya na sa valet attendant yung car niya. While waiting, I asked him.
"Where are we going?"

"Hmmm, san mo ba gusto? I'll treat you since you've been nice to me."

What if i've been super nice to you? Ano ang makukuha ko? More than a simple treat?

I gave a coy smile. "Italian resto would deem fine."

Nakuha niya yung key niya and he smiled back at me. "After you," he said and then
curtsied in front of me. I couldn't help but blush. Dane has his moments.
He drove to the nearest Italian resto. He ordered for me, as usual. Minsan baka
kung ano ang maorder niya na hindi ko naman kinakain, pero sure naman ako na
kakainin ko yun eh. I don't wanna act like a brat in front of him.

"Dane..."

"Hmm?"

"What's with you yesterday? You were so strange..."

He smiled. "Napansin mo pala?"

I nodded. Sino ba ang hindi makakapansin? He's been the weirdest yesterday. Para
ngang nakita ko yung weird annoying na sinasabi ni Gabbie. Kahapon kaya, he was
listening to some really hyped up music! He was so weird kasi mas more on classic
music si Dane. But yesterday? Sobrang upbeat ng music niya. Or talagang weird lang
ang taste niya?

"You've heard about Felice, right?"

My heart was now beating so fastly. Si Felice? Yesterday was all about Felice?

"Yesterday was her death anniversary. My family were so worried about me even tho
their worry was totally uncalled for. It's been... years."

Kahit na nung sinabi niyang it's been years, I can see in his eyes na yung effect
nung pagkamatay ni Felice, malakas pa din. Medyo naiinggit ako. How could someone
dead affect him this much? I don't get it. So what kung first love siya? She's not
the true love naman, right?

"I know, it's my fault that they're acting that way," he said then he drank the
glass full of wine.

"Why did you say that?"

He gave me a bitter smile. "You like me, right?"

"Ha?!"

He smiled. "Come on, I'm not insensitive. You like me, right?" I gave a small nod.
"Would you still like me if you know that I've been in rehab for a year?"

My heart figuratively stopped beating.

"What?!"

He gazed at me and gave me that look. "What? You don't like me anymore?"

Ano ba 'to? Tinatakot niya lang ba ako?

"O-of course not! I still like you..." but please explain things, Dane. Not knowing
would really kill me!

He shrugged and then placed back the glass on the table. "Sigurado ka?"

I gave him my confident look. "It's my feelings, Dane. I'm sure I have the dibs on
what to feel," I said, sarcastically.

He chuckled at me. "Alright, then. Let me continue my story... I was in rehab for a
year but not because of drugs. I... tried to kill myself." 

//
AN: I never said na Mr. DRAKE Palma ang name ng fiance ni Alys, oright? Hold your
horses, malayo pa ending ng SDP. And oh, malapit ng ilabas ang complete cast ng
TUM. Watch out =)))

xx

--- --- ---

Chapter 14
--
Chapter 14

Saying that I was shocked was a bit of an understatement... I was flabbergasted

and... deemed speechless by what I've just heard.

He smiled at my reaction. Maybe right now, he's betting that my reaction's

priceless. Well, yes, he's right. I've never been this knocked for six for my
entire life.

"F-for real?"

He nodded and then he continued eating his food. Me? I didn't even know how to
normalize my breathing, let alone kumain pa ako. Dane's indeed one hell of a man.
"Yes, I tried cutting my wrist, overdose of sleeping pills, stuff like that," he
said as if he's doing some story telling. Bakit ganito si Dane? He acts like he
doesn't care but yesterday, sobrang devastated ng itsura niya na kahit ngumiti
siya, I could still feel that there's something wrong.

"And.. why did you do that?" I asked, even though I know that I'm in no position to
question him.

He shrugged. "I thought I already told you? I did those messed up things because of
Felice."

I lowered my gaze. So, mahal niya talaga si Felice. Now, I am so  curious, I swear
I'll find out everything about that d-amned Felice!

"So really loved her, huh?"

"Love? I don't know. My life's been messed up since the day that she dumped me. I'm
not really sure what's the difference between love and like since then."

I scoffed inside. For once, may pinagkapareho din tayo, Dane. You're one confused
man and I am one hell of a confused woman. No, I'm not confused about my feelings
for you. Nalilito ako kung ano ba talaga ako sa'yo.

I have lost my appetite to eat kaya hinayaan ko na lang siyang ubusin yung pagkain
niya. Right now, my mind's drifting to somewhere else. Based on everything that I
have heard about Felice, she's one hell of a girl. How could she destroy Dane this
bad? I mean, she died four years ago so that makes her what? 17 that time? And Ate
Alys told me that she dumped Dane when they were 14. By these facts, I conclude
that she's a freaking tease. She lead Dane on for three years! Maybe she deserved
her death.

"Why aren't you eating? Ayaw mo ba?" he asked the moment he noticed that he's the
only one eating.
I shook my head. "No, I'm full already. Go ahead, finish your food," I said.

He shrugged and then continued eating. We stayed in the resto for another thirty
minutes since nagserve pa ng main course and such. Tahimik lang ako since inside my
head, I'm plotting against that cold and buried six feet under Felice. Ewan ko ba,
kahit patay na siya, sobrang naiirita pa din ako! I mean, ugh! She's dead and all.
Give na yun, pero yung presence niya, sobrang naffeel ko pa din. I wanna strangle
her and wring her neck!

"I'm done. You wanna go home?" he said, mukhang nag aalala siya sa akin butI shook
the thought away. I know there's a faint hope na Dane likes me back but I won't
cling onto that. No, not until I figure a way on how to drag Felice away from his
mind.

"No, uhm, Dane?" I said, "pwede bang mag half-day ako ngayon? I'm not feeling
well..." 

He cleared the distance between us and then he placed the back of his hand on my
forehead. "Hindi ka naman mainit, baka stress yan. I'll take you home," he
insisted.

"No, no. I'll get it from here. I'll take a cab na lang and you can go back to the
hotel. Baka malate ka..." I lied, truth be told, I'll go to Gabbie. Maybe she knows
what the hell is happening.

He gave me 'that' stare. "My family owns that d-amned company, Erika. Papasok ako
when I want to. Now, get inside my car," he said, authority very evident in his
voice.

I eventually gave in. Pumasok ako sa loob ng sasakyan ni Dane. But I text-ed Gabbie
already that I'll be swinging by later. I need all the information I can get, by
hook or by crook.

After a few minutes, nakarating na kami sa bahay namin.

"Thanks for the ride," I said.

"No prob. If you're not feeling well until tomorrow, don't go to the hotel. I'll
call in sick for you, alright?"

I just nodded and then waved him goodbye. Haaay, Dane. Why are you so d-amn
complicated yet so d-amn interesting?

"Manong, I'll be going to Gabbie's house," I said then pumasok na ako sa family
car. One of these days, mag aaral na akong magdrive, swear. 

Nakarating na kami sa bahay ni Gabbie in no time. Wala naman ang parents niya so
dumiretso na ako sa garden nila. Dito kasi ang fave place ko sa bahay nila eh,
magaling kasi mag alaga ng plants ang mommy ni Gabbie.

"Why are you here again?" she said, mukhang kakagising lang niya kasi naka pyjamas
pa siya.

"Well, good morning, Gabbie. 1 pm na, if you don't know."

She didn't retort back, which's weird. Umupo siya sa chair adjacent to me. "Summer
ngayon, Erika. I can sleep all day if I want. Now, what do you want from me?"
I rolled my eyes at her grumpiness. "I'll go straight to the point since inaantok
ka pa yata," I said then she replied with a yawn. Wala talagang manners ang babaeng
'to. "Who's Felice?"

Mukhang nawala ang antok niya sa narinig niya from me.

"Gabbie?" I said then snapped my fingers in front of her. "What do you know about
Felice?"

Natahimik siya for about five seconds but then, nagsalita din siya. "How much do
you know about her?"

I sighed and then I told her everything I know about Felice. Habang nagkkwento, I
couldn't help but feel jealous. Imagine, Dane tried to kill himself because of her?
Ano sila? Protégé ni Shakespeare at gustong gumaya kay Romeo and Juliet? Oh, for
the love of god!

"Since you know that much, wala naman na akong madadagdag. Halos yun lang din ang
alam ko about her..."

I pleaded, "additional info? Please, Gabbie? I'm desperate!"

She heaved a sigh and then started with her own version of story telling.

"I've been friends with Dane since first year college. Alam mo naman siguro na he
studied in US, di ba?" I nodded. I know Dane spent his teenage life in the US, kaya
nga medyo nagugulat ako na hindi siya liberated. "He was supposed to finish his
studies there. I heard from Ate Alys na kaya nandun si Dane despite na nandito sila
Tito Andy at Tita Dana is because of their Nana. May sakit na kasi ang lola nila
and the medication's available in the US only. Since Dane's really fond of his
Nana, sumama siya sa lola niya sa States and he continued his studies there. Nung
debut ni Ate Alys, binasted siya ni Felice. Dane didn't tell me that kasi he's a
bit on the mysterious side. He told me that one time he got drunk. Ayun, he was
about to fly back to the States kaya naglakas loob siyang magtapat kay Felice. He
was optimistic kasi akala niya, Felice likes her back... but the otherwise
happened. He was rejected, cold and ruthless rejection. Then, bumalik siya sa
States. It happened after a while, nung nakilala niya si Allison."

"Wait, Allison?" I intervened.

"Hindi mo kilala si Allison?"

I shook my head. Who the h-ell's Allison?

She gave me a smile. "You've heard enough from me, Erika. Find out the rest from
Dane. Sige, pasok na ko. Show yourself the way out," she said then she disappeared
from my vision.

--
"Bebe, sobrang vague naman pala ni Dane!" Kemp said. Pinapunta ko kasi siya dito sa
bahay. Kila Janice, Jelly at Russel kasi, si Kemp ang pinaka close ko. Ewan,
malapit ang loob ko sa mga effem na kagaya niya eh. They're fun to be with kasi.

I just gave a nod. "You got that one right, bebe."

"Kasi naman! How on earth would you compete with someone dead, di ba? Nako, bebe!
If I were you, kay Vance ka na lang!"

Bitterly, I smiled. "No, you know I couldn't."

"Haaay, bebe. You made your decision, ha? Don't regret that..."

"Ha? Why?"

He pouted. "Alam mo, Vance's going to Australia ngayon eh. Sorry! I wasn't suppose
to tell you about that! Kasi... best friend niyo pa din naman siya, right? Maybe
you wanna talk to him before he flies out of the country?"

"What?! Bakit ngayon mo lang sinasabi yan?"

"Hala, bebe, I'm so sorry! Sabi kasi ni Vance wag ko daw i-say sa'yo eh... Sorry
na, bebe," he said then embrace me.

"Aish," I said then I got my phone out. I dialled Vance's number.

He picked up after a few rings. "Yah! You're going to Australia without even
telling me?!"

("Wait, am I suppose to tell you what I'm doing? Girlfriend ba kita?")

Wow. He's really mad?

"Vance naman..."

("I'm sorry, Erika. I can't do this anymore. The more I think about you, the more
na nasasaktan ako. This is for the best.")

"What? You, abandoning me? For the best?"

("No. Me, moving on would be the best d-amned thing for the both of us.")

"Vance naman... You're really mad at me?"

("Basta. See you after a month. Bye, Erika. I love you,") he said then chuckled.
("Savor it. Baka yan na ang last time na marinig mo yan sa akin.")

"Dumbass! Balik ka after two months, ha? Get your a-ss back here or I'll go to
Australia myself and kill you!" I threatened him. He just laughed and then ended
the line.

Well... this's what I want, right? Ayan, wala na si Vance. This is for the best...
well, pehaps.

//
AN: https://www.facebook.com/nathanieldane.guzman
https://www.facebook.com/erikagarillo.wp
https://www.facebook.com/kemp.delavega

Add niyo sila! Once matapos ang SDP, I'll be focusing on this one! =)) Character
chart on the side. Or go to the external link para mas malinaw! 

xx

--- --- ---

Chapter 15
--
Chapter 15
"Good morning, Dane," I said and then I handed him a cup of freshly brewed coffee.
My time is almost running out, malapit na kasing matapos ang summer vacation that's
why malapit na ding matapos ang practicum ko. All the good things never last,
indeed.

He smiled back at me and then kinuha niya yung coffee niya. "Good morning din,
Erika. Why are you so gloomy today?" he asked me as he sipped his cup of coffee.
Just for one second, inisip ko na sana ako na lang yung coffee. Okay, I'm getting
way out of line with all these perverted thoughts running inside my mind.

I sat on my usual chair. Hay, pati 'tong swivel chair sobrang mamimiss ko.

"Patapos na din kasi yung practicum ko eh..."

He chuckled at my response. "Why? You gonna miss me?"

I gawked at him. "You're so full of yourself, Dane. Are you aware?"

He nodded. "I'm well aware, Miss Garillo."

I just shook my head. Grabe, ngayon, I could say na close na kami ni Dane. Well,
I've seen him quiet, gloomy, devastated, weird, funny, annoying, and in whatsoever
state. He's one heck of a man, I tell you.

One week na din pala kasi yung lumipas simula nung sinabi ko sa kanya na I like
him, or more like, pinaamin niya ako. Bakit ganun? Parang wala lang sa kanya na may
gusto ako sa kanya. Ganun yata talaga siya, immuned na sa mga babaeng nagkakagusto
sa kanya. Or... he's just learned to master the art of not showing any feelings?

On the other hand, one week na din pero wala pa din akong nalalaman about sa
Allison na 'yun! Well, news flash, Erika, madaming Allison sa mundo! Where would I
start? Ni hindi ko man lang alam kung ano ba ang last name ng Allison na yun. Where
the hell would I start, di ba? Hindi ko pa nga complete ang info about that cold
and dead Felice, dinagdagan pa ng Allison na 'to! Life really has its own way of
screwing over my head.

"Uhm, Dane?"

He was still reading something on his laptop kaya hindi siya nakatingin sa akin
nung sumagot siya. "Why?"

"Do you have plans for tonight?" I asked. Well, I'm already passed the stage of
being shy. Ano pa bang ikakahiya ko eh alam niya naman na may gusto ako sa kanya.

"Wala naman. Why?"

"Birthday kasi ng friend ko later. We're gonna go clubbing, baka gusto mong
sumama?" I asked, half wishing na pumayag siya. I heard from Gabbie na sobrang
sweet ni Dane pag lasing. Titignan ko lang naman, e.

He gave me a half shrug. "I suppose I can go but I don't do clubbing anymore,
Erika."

"Ha? Why naman?"

"Alcohol and I don't mix well."

I gave him my sweetest smile and tugged him to go. "Then we won't drink, just
dance. Sumama ka na, please?"

"Why are you so persistent? Besides, hindi ko naman kilala yung friends mo. Baka
ma-out of place lang ako," he reasoned out.

"No, I swear I'll entertain you the entire night that you won't feel out of place
for even one sec. Please, Dane? Please come?" I said and then pouted.

He chuckled at my pout. Ang cute kaya! Kemp said I look adorable when I pout!
"Fine, fine. San ba?"

"Sa Republiq. So... see you there?"

He nodded. "You don't drive, right? Sabay na lang tayong pumunta?" he offered. I
immediately nodded, grabbing the chance. Ipakilala ko kaya siya kay dad mamayang
gabi? Well, good idea. This time, ipapakilala ko siya as a close friend, hindi na
simpleng acquaintance lang. He checked his watch and then stood up. "Alright. I'll
pick you up later. Sige, punta lang ako kay dad," he said then umalis na siya,
pupunta kay Mr. Guzman.

I slumped back on my chair. Haaay, Dane. You make me feel so good.

I got my phone from my pocket, tinetext ko kasi constantly si Vance. I've been
bugging him restless simula ng umalis siya. Well, I could be a handful when I want
to. Ang dami naman kasing arte ni Vance! Nag eenjoy daw siya sa Australia baka daw
mag LOA siya this sem. Ang daming niyang reasons, for sure ayaw niya lang akong
makita!

("Bebe!")

"What?" I asked, medyo nilayo ko yung phone sa ears ko. Ang lakas naman kasi ng
boses ni Kemp!

("Ano ang ireregalo ko kay Janice? OMG naman kasi yung pangit na yun! She'll kill
me daw pag wala akong regalo!")

I rolled my eyes. Ang daming issue ng mag ex na 'to!

"You know, Kemp. Just kiss Janice later, I'm sure that would be the best gift
she'll receive tonight," I said.

Nagsalita naman siya ng isang litany kung gaano nakakadiri yung suggestion ko.
Well, ano bang nakakadiri sa sinabi ko? They already do the deed kaya! Ano ba naman
ang simpleng kiss, right? Ewan ko ba kasi kung kailan nagsimulang maging effem
'tong si Kemp. Sobrang hot niya kaya nung first year hanggang second year namin.
Pagdating ng third year, ayun, mas maarte pa sa amin ni Janice at Jelly! Kaawa nga
si Janice nun, e. In love na in love pa naman kay Kemp tapos ayun... si Kemp ang
type ay yung kuya ni Janice na engineering hottie. Hay, ang gulo ng buhay nila.

"Kemp, imbes na nag iinarte ka jan, magtrabaho ka na!" I said. Office hours pa
naman kasi tapos nag uusap kami sa phone. Buti na lang wala si Dane kung hindi baka
napagalitan ako nun, medyo mahigpit pa naman si Dane pagdating sa work.

("Hmp! Ang sungit mo! Magpapacute na lang ako kay Dane later para makaganiti ako sa
kasungitan mo. Bye!") he said irritably then he cut the line. Ang arte talaga!

Suddenly, the landline on Dane's table rang. Hmmm.

I stood up and walked over there. "Hello?"

("Hello, Miss. Is Dane there?") A guy asked. May accent eh, I would assume na
foreigner 'to.

"No, Mr. Guzman isn't here as of the moment. Who's this?"

("Tell him Andrei called,") he said.

"Alright, Mr. Andrei," I said and then got a piece of sticky note and a pen on my
hand. "Do you have any message for him?"

("Ah, yes. Tell him to call me back immediately. It's about Ally, please do tell
him.")

Natigilan ako. Ally? As in Allison?

"...Ally? Full name, sir?" I asked, my voice trembling.

("Allison Evans, Miss. Look, I have to go. Tell him to call me immediately. I
called him tons but his phone's off. Alright, bye.")

The line went dead. Allison Evans, I'll find out who you are.

--
The day went on, hindi bumalik si Dane sa office niya. May meeting pala sila ngayon
so I didn't see him the entire day. Umuwi na ako, well, I need my piece of peace
right now. I called the investigator. Binigay ko sa kanya yung name ni Allison.
Sobrang agitated ako. Am I ready para sa malalaman ko?

"Erika," someone called my name. Nakita ko si Tita Angel sa pinto ko. I nodded at
her. Medyo in good terms na kasi kami. "Why, Tita?"

She went near me and then she combed my hair using her fingers. She's like my mom.
Best friends sila ng mom ko kaya para talagang siya yung mom ko. Hay, I miss her so
bad.

"I talked to your father. He's still mad about you not coming last week," she said.
Oo nga pala, galit pa din si dad. I've said my piece of apology already. I've been
sincere with that pero galit na galit pa din siya sa akin. Hindi ko malaman kung
bakit sobrang magreact siya.

I gave her a small smile. "It will pass, Tita. I'm her only daughter, he'll forgive
me."

"You're right. Sana magbati na kayo ng dad mo, ha?"

"I hope so, too. Teka, may I ask you a question?"

She nodded, "Of course. Ano ba 'yun?"

"What's your relation with Dane?" I asked. I've been wanting to ask this question
for so long. I’ve had a hunch but I didn't wanna believe it. No, not until I have
hard evidence.

"Dane?" she said then she gave a small smile. "He's a good kid, Erika. He's been
through hell simula ng mamatay si Felice..."

My heart stopped beating. No.

Hindi ako makapagsalita. Everything right now is so crucial. So, Dane's Felice and
Tita Angel's Felice is the same?

She continued talking. "Like you, Felice was a good girl but she's a handful. Alam
kong alam ni Felice na may gusto sa kanya si Dane. I mean, they practically grew up
together. I even saw them kiss when they were four," she said then chuckled. "She
slapped Dane so hard and then she went to me crying, saying that Dane kissed her.
Ako naman, natawa lang. Ang bata pa kasi nila that time. Then things went the way
they should be. Alam mo naman na sa Batangas kami tumira after Felice turned ten,
di ba? Si Dane, sa Makati sila nakatira. They still communicated, sure, but Felice
grew the other way. Madami siyang nakilala sa Batangas kaya medyo nawala sa isip
niya si Dane. Pero si Dane, palagi pa din siyang naaalala. He wooed her for years,
kahit na oblivious si Felice sa ginagawa ni Dane."

I swallowed. Dane and Felice's history slowly unfolding. Ngayong naririnig ko na

'to, ano ba ang laban ko? They've been together since only god knows when. Ako?
Para lang naman akong pest na gumapang papasok sa buhay ni Dane.

"Then came the time na umalis si Dane for Cali because of his Nana. Si Felice,
medyo nalungkot siya but she managed. Like I told you, she found a new life in
Batangas kaya kahit wala si Dane, okay lang sa kanya. Nung nag 18 si Alys, Dane's
sister, umuwi si Dane to attend the debut. Nagtapat siya kay Felice but she coldly
turned him down, saying she doesn't feel the same. Not anymore. But she wanted Dane
as her friend. Pumayag si Dane, being the good guy the he has always been."

She stopped kasi nakita niyang nanginginig yung kamay ko. I motioned her to
continue. Kailangan kong marinig 'to.

"Dane went back to the US. He lived his life, hindi na siya nakikipag communicate
kay Felice frequently like he used to. Kay Felice? I belive she was fine with it.
She even got herself a boyfriend. My daughter became worse since she turned
sixteen. Hindi ko alam kung bakit, maybe because she learned about her dad," she
paused. "Then came her seventeenth year... her last year." She sobbed. Medyo naiyak
si Tita Angel. I know Felice died when she was 17. Naaawa ako kay Tita Angel but
not for Felice. Sa lahat ng narinig ko? I now believe that her death's well
deserved. "She heard from Alys na may girlfriend si Dane, no, not girlfriend. She
learned na madaming girlfriends si Dane sa US. Apparently, since the day she dumped
Dane, nagbago na si Dane. Gone was the Dane who was a good kid. Dane has been a lot
like his father, the way his father has been before he met Dana, you know her,
right?" I nodded, remembering Tita Dana's beautiful yet strict facade. "Felice was
fine with it, na madaming girlfriends si Dane. But what made her mad was when she
learned about that girl named Allison, I think."

There, si Allison na naman. Ano ba kasing meron sa kanya?!

"She asked me to book her a flight to Cali. Pumayag naman ako kasi first time
humingi ng pabor sa akin ni Felice. I mean, since the day she learned about her
father, hindi niya na ako kinausap," she said. Sino ba kasi yung tatay na yan?
"Little did I know na yun na pala ang first and last favor na hihingin sa akin ni
Felice... She went to Cali alive and kicking, but she returned here in a box," sabi
ni Tita Angel tapos umiyak na siya. "I loved my daughter kahit na hindi siya ang
pinakamabait na anak... Seeing her in a box crushed my heart. Hinatid siya ni Dane.
I don't know what happened back there, the only thing I know is that my daughter
died in a traffic accident. Si Dane? He's like dead, as well. Hindi siya
nagsasalita. We have no idea what happened in Cali, hindi siya nagsasabi. Umiiyak
lang si Dane buong lamay at libing ni Felice. The only thing he would say is ‘she
hates me’.”

"He also tried to kill himself kaya napilitan sila Andy at Dana na ipasok siya sa
rehab. He's been there for a year, and when he went out, hindi siya pinayagan ni
Dana na bumalik sa Cali. I don't know pero sobrang gustong bumalik ni Dane sa Cali.
I see no reason, namatay ang Nana ni Dane when he's still inside the rehab. I heard
Dane broke down when he learned about that. For the first month, sobrang
nagpupumilit siyang bumalik sa Cali but he couldn’t since his mother confiscated
his passport and visa. But one day, he stopped asking. That was the day Dane became
so... different. He rarely smiles. He never talks with his eyes. It's like... he's
dead."
 
Natigilan ako. Kaya pala... Felice really destroyed Dane. Pero bakit ganun? May
kulang pa din... Something's not adding up.

Tumayo muna ako at kumuha ako ng tissue for Tita Angel. I know saying these things
is hard for her. Felice's her only daughter... kahit na sobrang sama ng ugali niya.

"Si Allison, what do you know about her?" I asked.

She shook her head. "No, wala akong alam tungkol sa kanya besides the fact that
she's Dane's girlfriend."

-flashback-
 
"Dane, for real, wala ka nga talagang girlfriend?"
 
He gave that cold gaze. Suddenly, I felt chills crept up to my spine. "Why are you
so interested?"
 
"Just... harmless question," I said to hide the slight uneasiness I was feeling.
 
"I have one, I think."
 
Ha? He thinks?
 
"We didn't really break up so I don't know if we're still together. I'll fill you
in once I talked to her."
 
-present-
 
Oh, my god! Don't tell me si Allison yung girlfriend niya?!

I was interrupted from my deduction by a knock. "Miss Erika, hinahanap po kayo sa

baba. Dane daw po ang pangalan."

Tita Angel stood up after she wiped her tears. "Nanjan na pala si Dane, Erika.
Bumaba ka na at ako na ang bahalang magsabi kay Greg..." she said and then she
kissed my temple. "If you really like him, I'll support you, Erika. Just don't hurt
him. He's been through the worst."

I nodded and then fixed myself and went down.

"You ready?" he asked with a smile on his face.

How could he smile? How could he smile with all those horrible things that have
happened to him?

//
Si Dane at Erika sa gilid! =))) The cutey Quack Quack Couple! Add niyo sila sa fb.
Super nakakakilig omg I swear! Group on the external link. Sali kayo!
xx

--- --- ---

Chapter 16
--
Chapter 16

He took a step forward and snapped his fingers in front of me. "Hey, are you still
with me?"

I managed to give him an awkward smile, for heaven's sake, and said, "ah, yes. Did
I make you wait? Sorry, ha. Tara na."

He shook his head and then help me walk down the stairs.

"Republiq, right?" he asked. I nodded. "I won't drink anything tonight, Erika.
Sasamahan lang kita," he made it clear once again.

"Yes, I got the message crystal clear, Dane. No liquor for you."

"Good," sabi niya and then he opened the door of his car for me, which is a first
time, I believe. "After you."

I smiled and then complied. Pumasok na ako sa sasakyan pero yung utak ko, naiwan pa
yata dun sa taas. Medyo naguguluhan pa din ako sa mga nalaman ko. Felice's his
first love and then now, si Allison naman ay girlfriend niya. What about me? Ano
ang papel ko sa buhay niya?

If I'm getting it right, may communication pa din si Dane kay Felice, according to
what that guy named Andrei told me. I thought Dane doesn't have any communication
with Allison? He once told me he's not certain if he still has a girlfriend because
they don't communicate anymore. Ah, this is frustrating! I don't know what to
believe anymore!

"We're here," Dane said. My mind went back to the current scenario and there, I
notice na nasa harap na nga kami ng bar.

I fixed my skirt and then I looked up to Dane. "Let's go?"

He gave out a heavy sigh but nevertheless, bumaba din siya kasabay ko then he gave
his keys to the valet attendant. We walked side by side papasok sa bar. Medyo
naguguluhan ako, ano na ba ang status namin ni Dane? Currently flirting? Ganon? Or
worse... I'm just imagining things. After all, there's a girl named Allison in the
scenario. So much for my make believe happily ever after.

"Erika!" Janice shouted. Thank god they rented the place, ayoko kasing ma hassle
makipagsisikan. 

I walked faster than usual para makarating sa table nila. Hmmm. The place's not
that cramped up, may mga less than 20 people dito sa bar, closest friends lang
talaga.

I gave her my gift and then hugged her. "Happy birthday, Janice."

"Thank you, bebe!" she said and then accepted my gift. We call each other bebe. I
don't have the least reason why, just all of a sudden, bebe na talaga ang
endearment namin. Well, maybe it's Kemp's influence!
Dane promptly gave his gift as well. "Happy birthday."

Janice squealed, for the love of heaven. "Omg! For real? You got me a gift?" she
asked ecstatically as Dane handed her his gift. I wanna roll my eyes right now.

Dane scratched the back of his head, maybe he's not comfortable with all the
attention he's getting. "Ah, yes. Sorry baka hindi mo magustuhan, Erika informed me
only this morning."

I gasped. Now, he's putting the blame on me!

"Really, Dane? Sinisisi mo ako?"

He chuckled. "Nah, I'm just kidding. Hope you like it, Janice. I just got that from
my mom's boutique."

And now, Janice squealed even louder. Why am I even friends with her?

"Omg, I so love you na, Dane! You got me a dress from your mom's collection? I'm so
gonna faint right now!"

Bigla namang hinablot ni Kemp yung paper bag mula sa kamay ni Janice. "Arte mo ha!
Gupitin ko kaya 'to?"

Nagpout naman si Janice. "Bebe naman, of course may gusto ko pa din yung VS na
bigay mo sa akin, wag ka ng magselos, bebe..." she said and then nagpacute siya kay
Kemp and even hugged him!

"Yuck. Ang chaka mo, Janice! Hmp!"

Nagwalk out si Kemp and then hinabol siya ni Janice, kami na lang tuloy ang naiwan
ni Dane. Umalis din kasi si Jelly and Rusell, may pupuntahan yatang friend nila.
Oh, well. 

"Cool friends?" I asked him.

He shrugged. "I think so. Pero why do you keep calling each other bebe?"

"Why? Cute kaya ng bebe!"

He gave me that blunt look. "Really? Bebe? You sound like ducks."

Hinampas ko siya sa braso. "You're so mean!"

He smirked, which is so cool, by the way. "Bebe? Why not make it quack quack? That
sounds better."

Right now, I don't know how to react. Should I laugh or what? Come on! Nagjoke...
yata? Nagsmile na lang ako sa kanya tapos nagfrown naman siya.

"Corny ba?" he asked.

Nagpipigil na akong matawa sa point na 'to. Para kasing bata na inagawan ng candy
si Dane! Dahan dahan akong tumango. "Medyo? Pero para hindi ka mapahiya, here...
Ha-ha."

He rolled his eyes. Ang pikon talaga!

I tugged him papunta sa bar. "Tara sa bar, mamaya mabadtrip ka pa."

Naglakad na din siya, thank god. Akala ko mababadtrip siya sa akin. What have I
done wrong? To spare him from humiliation, tumawa pa nga ako eh. Now, siya pa yung
mukhang naiinis. Indeed, Dane is one weird man.

"Virgin coke for me," sabi niya sa bartender.

"Make that two," I added. We sat down sa stool sa bar, while watching Janice
getting down and dirty on Kemp. Mag ex ba talaga sila or what? Kung umakto sila
ngayon, parang sila eh.

I shot Dane a stray glance, I saw him in trance. Ano kaya ang iniisip niya?

"Uhm, Dane..." I said.

He looked at me. "What?"

I breathe deeply and then mentioned the call from earlier today. "Someone called,
uhm, he said his name's Andrei."

Seems like I got his full attention now. Ano ba kasi talaga ang meron, Dane? I
still remain clueless when it comes to you and it's killing me. "Really? What did
he say?"

"He said it's urgent," I said and then bit my lip. "It's about Allison daw..."

Natigilan si Dane. Yes, he was completely at my mercy. Parang mamamatay siya kapag
hindi niya narinig yung susunod kong sasabihin. 

He looked a bit reluctant when he asked me. "It's okay if you don't want to talk
any further, I'll just call Kuya Andrei myself," he said and then stood up before I
could even compose a reply. "Excuse me, I'll be back."

Being the usual stubborn girl that I am, I followed him. No, eavesdropping has
never been my cup of tea since forever but since I met Dane, it's becoming a habit
of mine. 

"Hello? Yes, kuya... Is she doing well?... No, I'm not at home... What?!... No,
please slow down, kuya... Yes, what the--- she's here?!"

"Ouch," I blurted out because somebody bumped into me from behind, causing my phone
to slip from my hand.

She picked up my phone and returned it to me. "Oh, my apologies. Here," she said.
Kinuha ko yung phone mula sa kanya. "Thanks," I said.

She smiled at me. "I'm sorry, still," she said and then stormed off... to Dane?!

"Dane!"

She jumped at Dane and kissed him on the lips. The moment Dane recovered, and while
I was still in daze, he spoke, "Ally..."

Oh, the great Allison. 

--- --- ---

Chapter 17
--
Chapter 17
I stiffled my sob and hid by the wall. If I let them see me crying like a girl who
have just lost her candy, that would kill me with utmost embarrassment. In the
first place, I know I don't have the right to cry like a girl that I am. I mean, I
freaking bestowed this upon myself. I flirted with Dane like he's an oxygen that I
badly need for my existence. I flirted without even asking for any godd-amned
labels or whatsoever. I mean, I practically asked for this!

But the worse thing? They're still within my earshot and that made me miserable
more than ever.

"Wait, Ally," I heard Dane saying, maybe between their kisses? D-amn! I never
thought I'd be this pathetic! 

"Mmm," Allison mumbled. D-amn, I only met her a minute ago but I already hate her!
These past few days, my hate list seems to be getting longer. Maybe I should look
for anger management session already, or maybe a shrink, too.

Dead silence followed. I'm guessing they're sucking the life out of each other. D-
amn bastard and d-amn hooker!

After what seems like forever, Dane spoke. "Allison Mari Evans, what the heck? The
last time I saw you, you were screaming and throwing me away from you but now,
you're kissing me like a mad woman. What the h-ell?" Dane said, seethedly. How did
I know? I glanced. And it killed me even more, seeing his arms on that Allison's
shoulder. Kill me now.

I heard Allison crying. Oh, great. Now, she's playing the damsel in vain card. "I-
I'm sorry, Dane. I remember you now... I'm sorry I forgot about you..."

Curiosity got the best in me. I carefully adjusted my position so I could see them,
clearly this time. I have masochistic tendencies. 

Upon hearing what Allison said, Dane hugged her. He whispered something in
Allison's ear and she just nodded and hugged him back. This is my cue. I should
leave. They're the happy couple now and who am I? I'm just... Erika. Erika f-ucked
up Garillo.

I need not to inform Dane that I'm leaving, he probably have forgotten about me
already. He's so into Allison. The way he's never been into me... Oh, screw this
life!

Grabbing my purse, I stormed out of the bar. Kemp saw me but I didn't look back
when he called for my name. I called for a cab and then asked him to drive to the
nearest bar. Oh, tonight I'm totally getting myself wasted.

--
"One more shot," I said to the bartender.

He served me a cosmopolitan. This should be good. I don't wanna try tequila. I want
to be wasted, not to wake up the next morning in some random guy's bed. Sorry, I'm
not that kind of girl.

I was so drawn into whatever I was drinking when someone spoke beside me. "One
mojito, please." She said. Her voice's so perky I wanna throw up. Ugh. This's why I
hated Trisha, Vance's ex. She's so bubbly. 

Turning my head to see who owns that perky voice was the biggest mistake I have
made today. Great, it's Allison.

She was patiently waiting for her order and so I scanned her physique.

Fine, I'll give her that. She's a freaking doll! Brunette hair, plump lips, tanned
skin, everything that spells out pretty lady, she's that.

She turned to look at me. "Oh, hello," she said with that annoying American accent.

I gave her a plastic smile. Over the years, I have mastered the art of hiding
disgust over someone.

"Hello," I replied.

She offered her hand. "I'm Allison, you are?"

I lightly shook her hand. D-amn! Even her hand needs to be so soft? "Erika."

She smiled at me and then sipped on her drink. "Nice to meet you, Erika." Oh, I
thought she's a chatty one. 

I swallowed every pride I have and opened a conversation. "So, how are you related
to Dane?" I asked. It seems to be a one heck of a conversation started because she
suddenly focused her attention to me.

"Dane? You know Dane?"

I nodded. "I used to work for him."

She slightly nodded. "Uh, well, I'm Dane's girlfriend."

And there, kill me now. 

Moments after I've recovered from shock, I asked her. "Really? The last time I
checked, Dane has no girlfriend," I said. No, no, Erika. Don't lose it now or it'll
get messy! 

She gave me a small smile, a sad one, specifically. Oh, something's up! "Well, he
thinks we've broken up... but we didn't really," she said. 

"Why?" Why can't you just get the h-ell back to where you came from?

"Long story..."

"I have all the time in the world." Lie. I have a meeting tomorrow at sharply 7 am
but I would manage. After a few days, my practicum would end. Darn.

She smiled. "Very well... I know this might sould a little weird but I just
recovered from temporary amnesia," she said. "Oh, it's not temporary at all, it
took me four years to recover. So, yeah. I forgot about Dane so maybe he thought
that we're over but really, we're not. God knows how much I love that guy."

"A-amnesia?"

She nodded. "Yes, cliched, isn't it? Took four blissful years of my life. But all's
well for now. I'm here to take Dane back," she paused. "You said you used to work
for him, right?" I nodded. "Is he dating anyone?"

I was tempted to say yes... and so I said yes. To h-ell with repercussions later. 
She shrugged like it's nothing. "Oh, well. He'll come over. I know Dane, he loves
me. Now that I'm back, he'll come back to me."

I took my drink in a gulp. I couldn't digest this woman's confidence!

"What makes you think Dane would just dump whoever he's dating for you?"

She put back her shot glass and then looked at me with those hazel brown eyes.
"Because he's mine... before Felice ruined it all."

--
I dialled Vance's number. I got home few minutes ago and still, after cleaning
myself up, I couldn't sleep.

Apparently, Dane dropped Allison to the hotel that she's staying in and then she
sneaked out and that's when I saw her in the bar. Sneaky girl.

I also saw Dane text me. 'Where are you?' Three little words but... it made me hold
onto whatever we have.

("What?") he said, yawning.

"What your arse. I think it's morning in there, you lazy ass!"

He laughed. ("Chill, Riks. Kamust? Why did you call?")

I sighed. "I hate to bother you with this pero you know you're the only one I could
talk to..."

I think he shrugged. Well, I assumed. ("Yup so fireaway. Gee. Dapat kasi naghahanap
ka din ng babaeng best friend, e. You're subtly turning me into a girl, Riks. With
all your dramas in life.")

"You know, I'd spank you if you're here!"

("Yeah, yeah. Spank me when I return. For now, ano bang problema mo?"

And so I started with my Dane issues. May Felice, may Allison. What a complicated
life.

"... so?"

("I love you still, Erika. Kalimutan mo na si Dane. May girlfriend, oh.")

"Gee, thanks, ha! You're a big, fat help!" I said with overflowing sarcasm.

("De, seriously, Erika. He's attached. You don't want him to cheat with you,
right?")

Cheat. Cheat.

(... hello? You still there?")

"... yes."

("What's with your silence? F-uck! Wag mong sabihing pinag iisipan mo yung cheat na
sinabi ko?")
I shook my head as if he could see me. "Thanks for the suggestion but I have
something better in mind."

("Huh?")

"I'll make Allison cheat."

("With whom?")

"With anyone."

("With me?")

"No, you're inlove with me."

("So?")

"...basta. Anyone but you. Ang gulo mo, ha! Matulog ka na nga jan!"

("It's morning here, Erika. Ikaw ang matulog jan. Magka eyebags ka na naman jan,
hindi bagay sa'yo.")

"So? Mahal mo pa din ako kahit puro ako eyebags. Suck it in, arse."

("Yeah, maybe I love you but you could still look ugly in my eyes. Nights.")

"Hey---- Ugh! B-astard!" he cut the line.

Now, I just need to think about my plan. Who to ask or to pay to seduce Allison
away from Dane?

--
No proofreading whatsoever. :)

--- --- ---

Chapter 18
--
Chapter 18

"Are you using cocaine, bebe?"

I rolled my eyes inwardly. Who am I kidding? As if naman papayag si Kemp na i-

seduce si Allison! Eh mas maarte pa sa akin 'to, eh.

"Yeah, yeah. Stupid of me to ask," I said and then laid my head on the table. It's
been two days since classes resumed, and it's been two days since I saw Dane. Maybe
they're right... maybe I'm on the verge of being obsessed with someone whom I can't
clearly have. But who cares?

This is why I love Machiavelli and his "the end justifies the means" principle. I'm
willing to play dirty so long as I'll have Dane.

Kemp stood up. "Bye, bebe. I have a class na. See yah!"

I got my things and went to the parking lot. I've been studying how to drive since
last week and it's driving me nuts! All those traffic rules and regulations are
killing me! Can't I just grab a car and drive? Gee.

"Yes, dad?" 
("Go home early.")

"Sure, but why?" I asked. My relationship with my dad and Tita Angel has never been
this better. Maybe my practicum has helped me bridge the distance between me and my
family. Well, I kinda missed them while I was busy with office works so I figured
maybe that was the triggering factor for my "long lost and now renewed" persona.

("We have something to tell you. Umuwi ka ng maaga, ha?")

"Okay?" I said and then hanged up. It felt weird, my dad speaking in Tagalog. I
mean, he rarely uses Tagalog so I feel crept out. He sounds so... in command. Weird
father.

I have arrived at the parking lot with my driver waiting for me. My dad's
paranoia... He doesn't allow me to drive alone until he could be sure that I'm not
a walking kill spree with my "mad" driving skills. 

After putting my seatbelt on, I started the engine. Oh, this certainly makes me
feel so dominating.

From: Dane Guzman

Are you free right now?

I hit the brake, I swear, Manong almost banged his head on the dashboard.

"Sorry po, Manong," I said.

My heart was still beating too loud for my liking. Goodness! They said don't text
while driving, but they didn't say not to read text while driving! Gee! Muntik ko
ng mapatay si manong dahil sa gulat ko sa text ni Dane.

To: Dane Guzman

Why?

From: Dane Guzman

I kinda missed you. So, are you free?

With a smile on my face, I replied a 'sure whatever.'

--
"Taro Milk Tea for Miss Erika."

Dane stood up. "I'll get it for you," he said with that heart melting smile on his
face. He came back with both our drinks on his hands.

"So... what's up?" i asked him.

He shrugged, as usual. "Nothing. I just missed my secretary," he said with a

mocking face.

I snickered. "Lol. As if. Ni hindi mo nga ako inuutusan nung nandun pa ako eh. You
used to be a better liar, Dane," I said.

He shook his head. "Fine, fine. I called you because Ally's been making me restless
since she came back."

That hit a nerve. Allison talk... again and again.

Although I badly wanna stand up and walk away, I continued with the conversation.
"Why? I thought you'd be the happy couple now that she's back?"

"I know I'll sound like a jerk with this pero... I don't think I like her the way I
used to. But I like her still... Ang gulo. Hindi ko din maintindihan yung sarili
ko."

Gustung gusto kong mag happy dance ngayon dahil sa narinig ko but the idea seems
preposterous so I just gave him a glum look. But goodness! This is the ray of light
I've been dreaming of!

"And why are you telling me these things, Mister? Don't you have Gabbie for this
kind of talk?"

He had a horror stricken face. "No, no, not Gabbie. She'll kick me out of her house
in no time once na marinig niya yung pangalan ni Allison."

"Why?" I said with a sudden interest.

"Long story..."

"I have all the time in the world, Dane," I said even though I should be at home by
now.

He shifted his gaze from my face to his drink. The way he looks at me makes me feel
special. I don't know what's with Dane but with just one look, I'll drop everything
for him. "One summer, pumunta ako sa States for my practicum and I was with Gabbie
since she's my practicum buddy. I think Allison already told you she had amnesia,
right?" he said and then I gave him a slight nod. "I sneaked out and went to Miami
to check her out pero kasunod ko pala si Gabbie because she was too bored that day
that she decided to tail me. And then things got out of hand. In the end, Gabbie
and Allison had a cat fight because... I don't really know the reason. I just stood
there, dumbfounded. Girls and their hormones. Unimaginable."

"Wait, what? Bakit sila nag away?"

He shrugged, but he was smiling. "Maybe because they both have a thing for me?"

"What?!"

He laughed. "No, I was kidding. I think the reason was because Allison thought I
was her stalker kasi since the day na pumunta ako sa States, I've been watching her
from a distance because she can't remember me and I don't want to scare her off.
But that day, she confronted me. Since Gabbie knows me too well, she went ballistic
upon hearing Allison call me names. But really, I didn't give a d-amn about Allison
cussing because she looks cute when she tries to be bad a-ssed."

The nerve. Kung ako kaya magmura ng magmura sa harap mo, cute din ba? Tss.

"Ah," that's all I have to say.

"Ikaw? What's up?"

"Me? The usual stuff. Graduation sheez."

"Hindi ka ba excited?"

"About what? Graduating? Nope. Not a bit."

"Why? The real world looks much better with a diploma at your side."

"Gee, thanks for the pep talk."

He laughed at me. Seriously, anong nakakatawa sa sinabi ko? Dane's being a bit
weird lately. Ano bang nakain nito?

"Care to share why you're so fond of laughing at me?"

He shook his head while still holding his breath from intensive laughter. Gee. "My
laugh wasn't offensive at all," he said at his defense. "This week has been so
crazy. My dad's being crazy as usual, my sister's bugging me about her wedding
issues, and Allison's being a pain. You're my escape from my reality."

I blushed upon hearing his explanation. "You're forgiven."

"What? I didn't say that I'm sorry. I love laughing at your face."

"I'll just pretend I heard an I'm sorry from you."

He, once again, shook his head.

"So... what's up with Felice?"

He was taken aback by my question. Why? Ang tagal na naming friends, I think I have
the license to ask about that "I-think-she's-a-b-itch" girl.

"What's up with her?" he asked back.

I didn't want to beat around the bush so I asked him point blank. "What happened?
Why did Felice die and Allison had an amnesia?"

Dane's face turned pale. 

"Why are you asking about that?"

"Come on, Dane. You've been feeding me with these tiny pieces of information about
your past and it's eating me up. Why don't you spare me from the misery of guessing
and just provide me the whole story?"

He cocked his head. "What difference would it make?"

I stared at his face. "Nothing. But Dane, I think I deserve to know. You perfectly
know my feelings for you yet here you are, telling me how cute Allison looks when
she curses. Don't you think you're being an a-ss to me?"

"And you think hearing about what really happened would make me less of an a-ss?"

I nodded.

"You're impossible," he said.

"Glad I made such an impression."

He threw himself back at the chair. "You're alot like Felice, don't you know?
You're both manipulative but that doesn't scare me one bit."

"Excuse me?"
He smiled at me. "Remember the first time I met you formally?" 

I nodded. That was when Tita Angel introduced me to him. He was freaking weird that
night.

"You'd be my next downfall, I'm sure. You're manipulative, indecisive, spoiled, and
nerve wrecking just like Felice."

I feel like weeping. Ganun ba yung tingin sa akin ni Dane? All those bad things?

"That was why I've avoided you like a plague at first but I didn't succeed. Ayoko
ng kahit na ano mula sa'yo. You're like history repeating itself all over again.
I've spent enough time at rehab center, Erika. And seeing you makes me lose myself
all over again. The way you look, the way you act, you make me see and feel Felice
all over again."

D-amn it! Hindi ako si Felice! Bakit ba si Felice na lang palagi! She's freaking
dead! Bakit ba mas priority siya kaysa sa akin na nandito, buhay at humihinga?!

"But I just can't avoid you, can I? When Tita Angel asked for a position for you, I
couldn't say no. Her daughter died because of me. I owe her everything she asks.
Kaya kahit ayokong makasama ka, I accepted you."

"Why didn't you just say no? Made reason?"

He stirred his drink and then stared right into my eyes. "Because you're like a
drug, Erika. I know you're nothing but harm but I like you anyways."

I pushed all my doubts and angst aside and held his hand that was sitting on the
table. "If you like me that much, why don't you just tell Allison that it's over
between the two of you and move on with me?"

He gave me a bitter smile and shook his head. "I'm a jerk but I'm not that cruel.
She's still my girlfriend and I owe her my loyalty. And besides... you're still bad
for me."

--- --- ---

Chapter 19
--
Chapter 19

I half willingly dragged myself inside our house. D-amn Dane. Masyadong paasa! I'm
near giving up. Really. If a man could only take too many rejection, I could only
take three rejections. I'm not a masochist; I don't like inflicting damage to
myself over and over again. I love myself enough to prevent me from self
destruction.

"We're already done eating. I did tell you to go home early, didn't I?" my dad said
the moment her laid his eyes on me.

I nodded and then took my seat. Good thing there's still food on the table. Kumuha
ako ng salad at bacon, weird combination but it tastes good.

Tita Angel poured me a glass of lemonade.

"San ka ba nanggaling, Erika? We were worried sick..."

I took a spoofull of the soup and answered her. "I was with Dane. I'm sorry I came
home late, Dad. Could you please stop glaring at me? I had a rough day, okay?"

He shook his head and I could see evident disappointment in his eyes. I think my
Dad thinks he has such bad luck for having a daughter like me. I know he's been
dying to have a son. Well, too bad I'm the sole heiress to his fortune. Ano bang
magagawa niya kung hindi tanggapin ako, or what? Idonate na lang niya sa charity
yang buong buhay niyang pinagtrabahuhan na kumpanya. That could work for me as
well, my mom ensured a trust fund for me. My lawyer said it's quite a fortune.

"As I have told you earlier, Erika, we have something to say..." sabi ni Dad after
pacifying himself.

I took another spoonful of soup and nodded at him, probing him to continue.

"You had a sister."

I nodded, it's old news. I knew I have a half sister somewhere in this d-amned
world. And so? 

"What's up with that? Alam ko na yan, dad. Yan yung dahilan bakit nagpakamatay si
Mom dati di ba? Bakit mo sinasabi? Gusto mong alalahanin natin yung mga panahon na
suicidal si Mommy? Go ahead, sisimulan ko na ba?"

I know ang bastos ko. I grew up like this. No, I didn't grow up to be this manner-
less. I was a perfectly respectful kid until the day my Mom died. Since then, I
learned not to respect my Dad. Sure, I respect him at times but he doesn't have my
full respect. The memory of him betraying my Mom over and over again until my Mom
died was freshly etched in my mind. I don't think I could look at my Dad with
respect in the near future. Somehow, a part of me would always hate him.

He clutched his chest,and that's my cue to stop.

"I'm sorry," I uttered.

Tita Angel grabbed a glass of water for my Dad and she opened Dad's medicine kit.
He's kinda old so he's taking plenty of medicine.

I continued eating. I don't know what's with me. I feel really bad today. Today
could pass as one of the worst days in my life.

"I think we shouldn't tell her now," Tita Angel said to Dad.

"Tell me what?"

When Dad recovered from shock, he drank another glass of water. "No, now's the
time. Erika," he said and then looked at me. "You remember Felice? She's your
sister."

"What?!"

"She's your sister, half sister to be exact. She's older than you because I was
with Angel before I met your Mom," said.

I stood up. "Shut up, Dad. I don't want to hear any of this."

He stood up as well and then continued with his lies.

I tried to cover my eas with my hands but that didn't do. Shut up, dad! I don't
want to hear any of your lies! 
"You remember that time when your Mom threw me out of the house? That was when she
discovered about Felice being my daughter, that was also the time when Angel and
Felice went to Batangas because your Mom threatened them."

I threw the glass across the wall. "Shut up, Dad!"

"I'm telling you all of these because I don't want to lie to you anymore, Erika. I
regretted cheating on your Mom when she was still alive, and it's haunting me now.
I just wanna correct all my mistakes..."

I don't know what to do. Ano ba yung dapat kong maramdaman? Masaya? Matuwa kasi
ngayon, alam ko na kung bakit namatay yung Mommy ko? Dahil nalaman niya na yung
asawa niya, may anak pala sa best friend niya?!

"What now, Dad? You think saying all these bulls-hit would correct your mistakes?!"

He shook his head. "No, I just want to be true to you now, Erika. Let's start as a
family now."

I laughed. "Are you f-ucking screwing with me? Sasabihin mo lahat ng ginawa mong
panloloko sa nanay ko tapos ngayon sasabihin mo na magsimula tayo?!"

He took a step forward.

"Angel's pregnant with your sibling, Erika. Let's start anew as a family. I told
you all those secret because I want to begin now as a family. No more lies, no more
deceit."

I took my plate and then threw it against the wall as well. 

"I hate you now more than ever, Dad. I hate you."

I walked upstairs and grabbed my keys and a bag full of clothes and stormed out of
the house. I cannot fathom living under that roof with those immoral people! How
dare they do that to my Mom?! All along, akala ko naging si Dad at si Tita Angel
after my Mom died, yun pala, bata pa lang ako, may ginagawa na silang kagag-uhan!
And worse, may anak pa pala sila! And worst, si Felice pa!

I tried calling Kemp, Janice, Jelly, and Rusell but I couldn't reach them. Gabbie's
not around, she's out somewhere in Asia. Pano na ako ngayon? 

With no choice, I dialled Dane's number.

--
"Are you feeling better?" he said after buying me a bottled water. Nandito kami
ngayon sa 711.

I shook my head. "I just heard the biggest revelation in my life. I don't think
I'll be fine with just a bottle of water."

He nodded and then smiled at me. "Things will get better, Erika."

I gave him a smug smile. "Things never worked in my favor, Dane."

"What made you say that?"

I pointed at him. "You, for example. I have set my eyes on you since the day I
stepped on St. Claire's but look at me, still the pathetic Erika who couldn't have
you."

He smiled at me. "You can't get everything that you want."

"Precisely," I said and then tried to eat the hotdog sandwich he bought for me.
"Nasan nga pala si Allison?" I asked.

He threw me that look. "You know, I've learned that I'm being a jerk when I'm
mentioning her name in front of you. Could we not talk about her?"

"Who finally informed you about that? I'll thank him/her personally for giving you
a wake up call," I said.

He smirked at me. "That's more like it, Erika. I like you better when you're being
sarcastic."

"Why? Because I'm becoming more like Felice when I'm like this?"

Now, everything's coming into place. Kaya pala ako kamukha ni Felice because she's
my godd-amned sister! Kaya pala kaugali niya ako, because we f-ucking share the
same genes! Too bad I'm still alive and she's out there rotting somewhere. 

He held my hand that was on the table. "Please let's not talk about Felice or
Allison, can we?"

"Why? Alam mo, Dane. Mas g-ago ka pa sa mga tinatawag nilang player or casanova.
Wanna hear my opinion? Kasi ang sama ng ugali mo. May girlfriend ka pero what the
h-ell? You're tagging me along. Saying sweet nothings, caring about me, pero pag
alis ko, ano? Balik ka na naman sa pagiging boyfriend ni Felice?" I seethed.

Dane was just looking at me. Hindi ko pa din siya maintindihan. Sa ilang buwan na
magkasama kami, not once ko siya nakitang magalit. He's always like that... So
uptight. It's like he's afraid of showing any emotion at all.

He smiled at me. "I warned you before but you still chased me, Erika. Who's at
fault for falling for such a ruthless jerk like me?"

I gave him a mocking laugh. "Alam ko naman, kasalanan ko. Mahal kita eh. Magagawa
ko? Thank you pa din, ha? Kasi kahit alam mong mahal na mahal kita, nandyan ka pa
din, ginag-ago ako."

He stood up. "I don't want to talk to you in this state, Erika. Hahatid na kita sa
inyo."

"Wait, di pa ako tapos, Dane."

"Shut up."

I stood up as well and then followed him outside. While walking, I kept on talking.
"Alam mo, Dane? I'm starting to lose my mind."

"Good for you. Me? I've lost my mind years ago."

Malayo pa yung pinag park-an niya ng sasakyan kaya malayo pa bago ako tumigil sa
pagsasalita. I don't know why I'm being like this but heck, it feels so good, to
finally say the things that's been bothering me.

"Let's talk about Erika now, Dane."

"Let's talk about her when you're in your normal state."

"Why? I like myself now. I feel so alive. Ano? Let's talk about that estranged
woman."

Napahinto siya. "Don't talk about her like that, Erika. You don't know her."

"Really? I think I know her enough. She's a b-itch, right? Sabi mo kagaya ko siya.
Well, I'm well informed about myself."

He closed his eyes and breathe. "Please, Erika. Drop this topic. You don't wanna
see me mad."

"I wanna see you mad, Dane! That's the whole point! Please, show any emotion!"

He faced me and then placed both his hands on my shoulder. "No, Erika. Ganito ako.
Live with it."

"No, I won't live with it. Dane, Felice destroyed you, I get it. But she's dead!
Nandito ako, o kahit na si Allison. Nandito kami, oh! We're alive and breathing
pero ikaw, ano? Still hanged up on the b-itch!"

Ang sakit ng balikat ko sa sobrang higpit ng hawak niya. Galit na si Dane pero yung
mata niya, ganun pa din, wala pa ding emosyon. Sobrang sama ni Felice para masira
niya ng ganito si Dane...

"You don't know what you're talking about," he said, more like whispered.

"Oh, Dane, I know what I'm saying. She's my sister," I finally said.

Napatingin siya sa akin.

"I've been thinking about this, Nathaniel Dane Guzman. You once said to me that
you'll do anything for Tita Angel because she's Felice's mother. How about me?
Would you do anything for me, as well, because I'm her d-amned sister?"

He's still dumbfounded.

Inalis ko yung kamay niya sa balikat ko and looked him in the eye.

"You killed my sister, Dane. Console me. Ditch Allison and come running to me."

Let's now play dirty, Felice. You're my sister. I'll use you the way your mother
used my mother. Let's get even.

--- --- ---

Chapter 20
--
Chapter 20

"What is it, Gabbie? It's freaking seven a.m.!"

("Whatever, Erika. Nandito ako sa labas ng unit mo. Open the door.")

I stretched first and then fixed myself in the bathroom. It's been three days na
pala since nagmove out ako sa bahay namin. Good thing my Mom's condo's still alive.
Hindi ko alam kung saan ako pupulutin kung wala 'to. I also have money in the bank
so I think I could survive for a few weeks. Yung trust fund ko kasi, makukuha ko pa
after graduation. But I think I could sell my car na lang. I don't trust my driving
skills din naman.

After my morning rituals, pinagbuksan ko na ng pinto si Gabbie. "Well, good

morning, Gabbie. What brings you here? To give me my pasalubong?"

She rolled her eyes. What a girl. She's been missing in action for weeks then now,
roll eyes pa ang isasalubong niya sa akin? Gabbie, oh, Gabbie. What should I do
with you?

She made herself comfortable on my couch. "Tell me, what did you do to Dane? I went
to their house yesterday for her sister's wedding pero ang bumungad sa akin, isang
Allison na nagmamakaawang wag siyang iwan ni Dane."

I made myself a cup of coffee and sandwich. "And? Bakit ako ang pinuntahan mo?"

She shook her head. "Come on, Riks. Let's cut the bulls-hit, please? Ikaw lang
naman makakapagpahiwalay kay Dane kay Allison, e. So, ano nga?"

I sipped my coffee first and then my phone vibrated.

From: Dane
Office.

I smiled to myself. Since that day, lagi na akong tinetext ni Dane tungkol sa
whereabouts niya. Alam ko naman na galit siya sa akin, but what could he do? He
killed my sister. Lagi kong ipapaalala sa kanya yun sa panahon na nag iisip na
siyang iwanan ako at bumalik kay Allison.

"I blackmailed him," I said to Gabbie, point blank.

"And how?"

I said the full details to her, not forgetting a bit. She's almost my sister kaya I
don't see any reason para magtago pa ako ng lihim sa kanya. She knows about my
hatred to my Dad and her wife and my love for Dane. Ano pa ba ang makakagulat sa
kanya sa ginawa ko ngayon? I have done worse. Trust me, this is just almost a
child's play.

Her face was in full shock. "Wow."

I smiled at her. "Things you do to eliminate Allison."

She snatched my coffee. I was about to say 'hey,' pero she started talking. "You
know, Erika, I know I hate Allison down to the last strand of her hair but I think
she's pretty cool. Based sa sinabi sa akin ni Dane, siya yung tumulong kay Dane
noon nung iniwan siya ni Felice. Dane was cruel to her kasi ginawa niyang rebound
dati si Ally, pero kahit na ganon, tinanggap pa din siya ni Allison."

"Did you know that when Dane was in Cali, he was self destructive. Kahit ang
grandparents niya, malapit ng mawalan ng pag asa sa kanya. But when he met Allison,
he changed. Kaya nga kahit na nakakainis yang si Allison, I don't think she
deserves what she's now getting. She only love Dane, what's so wrong about it?"

I arched my brow at her. "Bakit? I only love Dane, as well. What's so wrong about
it?"

She heaved a sigh, sign that she's already frustrated. Well, news flash, I'm
frustrated as well! I just woke up only to be disturbed by Gabbie and her Allison
issues. "I know. But it's different with you, Erika..."
"What's so different between my love and Allison's love?"

"You have Vance, Erika. You would always have him. But Allison? She only has Dane.
Technically speaking, malapit na silang mag five years, Riks. Before you even met
Dane, sila na ni Allison. Do you see where I'm coming from?"

I shook my head. "Shut it, Gabbie. Five years or what, what does it matter?
Magsisimula kami ni Dane ngayon and we'll beat their relationship. We'll last for
decades. Don't you trust in me? I love him. So much."

She just smiled at me. "I believe in you, Erika... But how about Dane? How is he
coping up?"

"He's Dane. Cold and emotionless. But I'll get him," I said. Three days na kaming
magkasama. After class, didiretso ako sa office niya. Minsan, maabutan ko dun si
Allison pero hindi ko na lang siya pinapansin. Hindi naman siya pinapansin ni Dane,
e. Para lang siyang kawawang babae na gustong kausapin si Dane. She's pathetic. 

She also talked to me, seems like wala siyang idea na ako na at si Dane. She even
asked me na tulungan ko siyang makipagbalikan kay Dane. Could you believe her? Why
not just return to wherever she came from? Kung hindi lang kami magkagalit ni Dad,
malamang mag offer pa ako na sagutin ang ticket niya.

After quite some time, umalis na din si Gabbie. I went to school para sa thesis
consultation ko. Konting revision na lang, matatapos na ako. After that, maghahanap
na ako ng trabaho. I swear to God, hindi na ako babalik sa bahay namin. Good thing
magkakaanak na pala yung dalawa, e di yun na lang gawin nilang tagapagmana. Ayoko
din naman. Saka isa pa, kapatid ni Felice yun, e. Baka masama din ugali nung bata.

"Good evening, Dane," I said. Nandito na naman ako sa office niya. Buti na lang
wala si Allison because swear, sasabihin ko na sa kanya na ako na ang girlfriend ni
Dane.

He just nodded at me then nagtrabaho na ulit siya.

"Dinner later?"

"Sure."

Hindi na ako nagsalita, baka kasi mainis siya sa akin. Hindi niya na nga ako mahal,
maiinis pa siya sa akin. I don't want that to happen kaya nanahimik na lang ako. 

After work, dumiretso kami sa bahay nila. May dinner pala ngayon kasama yung fiance
ng Ate niya. Ang bait ni Ate Alys, bakit kaya hindi mabait si Dane like her? It's
Felice's fault. She really destroyed him beyond repair.

His parents talked to me, si Tita Dana and Tito Andy. They're both wonderful. Good
mood sila dahil malapit na yung wedding nga ni Ate Alys. Invited din ako kaya lang,
hindi ako part ng entourage. Matagal nang polished ang wedding.

During dinner, Allison came. The nerve! Bakit ba siya ganito? Ako naman nung hindi
pa kami ni Dane, never kong inivite ang sarili ko sa bahay nila. I mean, at least I
know my boundaries. 

Upon seeing Allison, umalis agad si Dane. I was hurt, of course, seeing how
affected he was. But he'll come around, I just know he would.

"Dane..." Allison uttered but she couldn't do anything. Good thing umalis na agad
sila Tito Andy dahil may aasikusuhin pa sila para sa final touches sa kasal ni Ate
Alys. With that, I grabbed the opportunity to talk to Allison.

"Hey," I said while she was still gazing at Dane's back while he was walking
upstairs. She turned her gaze towards me. "Are you insensitive or what?"

"Huh?"

"Dane hates you. Go away," I said through gritted teeth. Playing nice would just
prolong her agony so I decided with my normal approach, to hurt her.

Her tears were on the brink of falling. "Erika..."

I sighed. "Look, Allison, I don't know if you're playing dumb or if you're just
plain stupid but either way, it's pretty obvious that for Dane, it's over."

She cried. D-amn. 

"No, Erika. You're wrong! Dane loves me!"

I rolled my eyes. "Sorry to break this into you but Allison, Dane and I are
together. Back the f-uck off or be ready to get hurt."

--- --- ---

Chapter 21
--
Chapter 21

"What again, Erika?"

I frowned upon hearing Dane's reaction. 

"What? Binibisita lang naman kita, a," I said in my defense. What did I do to
destroy his mood? I merely went to his office to visit him. What's so wrong with
that?

He continued signing his papers. "I'm busy. What do you want?"

I just stood there since I feel I'm not welcomed. I'm not insensitive naman, alam
kong galit siya sa akin. And frankly speaking, I care. Pre-Dane era, never would I
push myself to someone who doesn't like me. If you don't like me, fine. Suit
yourself. But now? Look at me. Pushing myself towards Dane at its finest.

"Dinner later?" I asked. Kakagaling ko lang sa school and my defense went well.
Konti na lang, matatapos ko na yun. Sa summer pa ako magmmarch since delayed ako
for a sem but that's fine.

Another reason why I went here is because I'm tired of having dinner alone. Since
umalis ako sa bahay, lagi na lang takeouts ang kinakain ko. It's tiring and it's
making me nuts!

Dane looked at me and sighed. "Sure, sure."

I smiled at him and then I went out. Dun muna ako nagstay sa lobby. 

--
"Let's go?"
Tumingala ako and I saw Dane's handsome face looking at me. I smiled at him and
held his hand. Naglalakad kami papunta sa lift ng makasalubong namin si Allison...
again. She's here. Again. 

"Dane," she said and then hinawakan niya yung braso ni Dane. Me? I was there,
dumbfounded. What could I do? In front of Dane, I'm like a kitten. I cannot do
anything harsh to Allison, that would make him hate me. He hates me enough, I don't
need to make him hate me more.

He turned his gaze at me. "Can we talk?" he said, pertaining to him and Erika.

While biting my lips, I answered, "Sure."

I can see from here that she's crying her balls out. She's so freaking annoying and
she's really getting in my nerves. Dane didn't remove Allison's grip on his arm so
syempre, ilalayo ko na ang Allison na yan kay Dane. 

I started tailin them when I heard Allison say, "You still love me dont you, Dane?"

Ugh pathetic little bitch!

I decided to intrude. I worked for this! I worked so hard to have Dane notice me
and hindi ko yun sasayangin para lang makapag usap si Dane at Allison. I'm way
better than that. "Excuse me, but I believe that’s my boyfriend you’re harassing,
Allison"

They both looked at me. And I can see that Dane has this pained expression
plastered on his face. He still loves her...

Hindi gumalaw si Allison sa pwesto niya kaya hinatak ko ang kamay niya paalis sa
braso ni Dane then I linked my arm with his. 

"Just get the f-uck away from here, Allison. Tigilan mo na kami. You’re being a
pathetic bitch following Dane around and begging him to get back with you. He
doesn’t love you anymore, understand?! He loves me. So just get back to wherever
the hell you came from."

If being harsh would make her go away, then I’ll give her the taste of Erika
Garillo’s b-itchest side. Kung nakaya ko ngang gamitin ang namatay kong kapatid,
who is she for me to spare?

"Erika... just, stop."

I looked at Dane. Ugh! He’s siding with her. Kaya mas lalong di lumalayo yang
babaeng yan eh. She needs to see where she should stand. And that's nowhere near
Dane. She needs to stand somewhere far. Somewhere where we can't see even her
shadow. Her f-ucking shadow.

"Whatever. Let’s go. And you, if you don’t get out of this building, I’m calling
security.” I said to Allison. She's on the verge of crying again. Pathetic little
baby.

Hinatak ko na si Dane papasok ng elevator. Pagsara ng elevator doors, he said

"Don’t be too harsh to her. You’re breaking her, Erika."

I gave him my smug look. "Anong gusto mo? Pa-sweet pa ko sakanya? Kaya mas lalong
di lalayo yan eh. Kinakampihan at hinahayaan mong sundan ka. You're prolonging her
agony, Dane! Spare her!"
And he didn’t respond.

What do I need to do to eliminate Allison in our lives? For good. She’s such a big
pest to our relationship. How could Dane fall for me if nandyan lang siya at
nanggugulo samin. Will I always be Erika? His other woman? His spare one?

--
A week passed and thank God, walang Allison na nanggugulo. Good thing na wala siya.
Sana lang maisipan niya din na bumalik kung sang parte ng mundo man siya
nanggaling.

After class, I went straight to Dane’s office to surprise him with the food that I
baked kaninang umaga. He should be grateful na ipinagluto ko siya! First time kong
mag luto. At di ko alam kung edible ba tong ginawa ko. 

Dirediretso ako sa office niya, since girlfriend niya na naman ako... I made it
clear to everyone around us. He's mine.

At pag pasok ko, wala akong Dane na nakita. 

Where could he be? It’s office hours and at this time of the day, lagi lang siyang
nasa loob ng opisina niya.

Iniwan ko na lang yung lunch na ginawa ko for him at bumaba na ko sa lobby at

nagtanong sa receptionist.

"Mr. Nathaniel was out since 10 am, Ms. Erika."

"Oh. Do you know his whereabouts?"

"No, Ms. Erika. He didn’t leave an information about where he’ll be going."

"Oh okay. Thanks."

Where could Dane be? 

--

Pumunta muna ako ng mall to relax. These days have been exhausting. Pag dating ko
sa mall, una kong ginawa, pumasok sa isang resto since di pa pala ako naglulunch
myself at gutom na ko.

I decided to eat at The Old Spaghetti House since I’m craving for their pasta.

I sat at the corner and shocked to see Dane sitting ahead of me. Naka-harap siya
sakin kaya di ko nakikita yung babaeng kasama niya na nakatalikod sa view ko. 

And I’m starting to have a hunch kung sino ang babaeng yun. Bullshit.

Tumayo ako at lumakad towards them. 

Creating a scene is not on my vocabulary but it looks like I'm bound to do one,
soon.

“Oh hi there, boyfriend and pathetic b-itch. What a pleasant surprise. Why wasn’t I
invited in this little tea party?” Dane stood up and held my arm.

He whispered, probably dahil nahihiya siya sa ginagawa niya. I know that he doesn't
love me but can't he give me the courtesy to not be cheated on?! I mean, come on!
Girlfriend niya pa din ako! Masyado bang mahirap intindihin yun? "Erika. Don’t make
a scene in here."

"I’m not even starting yet tas binabawalan mo na ko? Why are you having lunch with
this pathetic girl? I came to your office to give you a cooked lunch and then I see
you here, having a little party with her?!"

“Calm down Erika. We we’re just having lunch. Let’s just go shall we?”

"No. Maybe the three of us could eat together, right, Allison?"

I glared at her. How dare her! I clearly told her to stay the f-uck away from us
and here she is having lunch with Dane.

She felt uneasy kaya tumayo na siya. That's right, b-itch. Know your place. "Uh m-
maybe I should go. Bye.” Then nagmadali na siyang umalis

Lumabas na din ako at iniwan ko sa loob si Dane. I'm mad at him but I know I'll
cool off soon. I can't stay mad at him.

I’ve had enough of their petty, little drama. 

I need a break. Minsan kasi, nakakapagod din. Papahinga muna ako kay Dane. I need
to collect myself. And I’ll think of another plan on how to PERMANENTLY eliminate
Allison.

--
Announcement: Due to my busy sched (charots), si Erica Domingo na ang magpapatuloy
nito. Yes, I gave her my permission and yes, ieedit ko pa din before posting. Dito
pa din ipopost gusto ko lang sabihin na siya din ang co-author ko dito. Cheers!

--- --- ---

Chapter 22
--
Chapter 22

A day already passed since the torturing encounter at The Old Spaghetti House. And
since I miss Dane already even though I said that I’ll have a time out and its just
been a day of not seeing him, I’ll go see him at his office again. And this visit’s
a surprise again. By this time, Allison should have learned her lesson. She really
should! Dapat niya talagang isaksak sa kukote niyang, akin lang si Dane. He was
hers but she messed up her chance. Now, he's mine. And forever he'll be mine. 

I arrived by 2pm at Dane's office. By this time, he's probably spending his time
signing some papers. My man is a hard working individual. No wonder their family
business is at its peak.

I strutted towards his office when suddenly, this random woman blocked my way. Sino
ba 'to? 

My left brow automatically raised.  

"Uhm, excuse me, Ma'am, but, do you have an appointment with Mr. Guzman?"

"Are you seriously asking me that?” I scoffed at her face. I'm not really rude, I
really am not. But there comes a time when I just hate everything. I hate my
parents, I hate Allison, I hate everything! The only thing that keeps me sane? My
goal to chase Dane until he gives in.

I was busy giving this woman a piece of my mind when suddenly, I heard laughters
emerging from Dane's office. I kept my cool but really, my blood's staring to reach
its boiling point. I mentally massaged my temple and tried to calm myself.

I swear I saw fear cross Dane's secretary the moment she looked at my face. I tried
to keep my face straight and I pushed her out of my way. 

And the scene before my eyes made my heart cringe, for the nth time. For countless
of times already, Dane let me down. He always does but my heart just won't let go,
won't give up. But of course, I’ll never show that kind of emotion in front of them
and I’ll wear my famous intimidating façade. They can hurt me but I will never give
them the satisfaction of knowing. No. Never.

Ang saya nilang tignan habang nagtatawanan and, they’re too close for my liking.
Too close. Just too damn close.

But, soon, I’ll wipe that smirk away from little Ally, the pathetic girl’s face.

"Oh lookie. Who do we have here. Hm. Oh! It’s the little pathetic b-itch again! Why
didn’t that seem to surprise me anymore?" I said, sarcasm at its best. 

They both looked at me at the same time.

And nawala agad ang ngiti sa mukha ni Dane pagkakita niya sakin.

Damn.

I thought I could get used to the idea of Dane constantly putting me down but why
is that that everytime he does, the pain I feel does not subside? It just keeps on
hurting, hurting worse everytime.

“Uhm.. Dane, I guess I’ll get going. Bye.”

Oh no. Not so fast, girl.

I grabbed her arm before she can get out of the door. And I whispered in her ear,
"Stay away from my man, Allison. Don't make me."

 She didn’t respond and just walked off.

"What did you tell her, Erica?" said Dane with a threat laced in his voice.

"Relax Dane. I just wished her a safe trip on her way to wherever the hell she’d
go," I said then sat comfortably on his mini sofa and crossed my legs.

"You’re so frustrating. Could you please stop being a pain in the ass and leave
Allison alone? Please?” He said while massaging his temples.

"You’re calling me a pain in the ass?! Who’s more pain in the ass between me and
her?! She follows you everywhere like a dog and she’s a big hindrance to our
relationship! And you call me the pain in the ass one?! Huh!”

And….

I finally erupted.

I know people probably think that I am cruel. Well, I really am. I am human and I
am capable of every emotion possible but is it my fault that among all these
freaking emotion, anger is what emerged? I need something to keep me alive. And if
being angry to Allison is what will make me, then what the hell.
"Maybe you should go back some other time when you have your senses with you,
Erika."

"Ugh!"

I stormed out and slammed his office door, hard.

 You can never get rid of me, Dane. Never.

-- 

I went straight to Starbucks to relieve my raging nerves.

"Kemp, meet me at SB Smm, asap. Contact Janice too. Can’t get a hold of her. Bye."

I hanged up immediately cause I ain’t in the mood for Kemp’s rant why he should be
the one to contact Janice.

Panigurado kasing magrereklamo yun. 

After 30 minutes of waiting, they finally arrived.

"Tagal niyo!" I scoffed. I rolled my eyes at them and took a sip of my frappe.
Until now, sumasakit pa din ang ulo ko kay Allison. That damn woman! She looks like
a sheep but she's a freaking tigress!

"Init ng ulo agad, bebe?"

"Tss tara na nga. Samahan niyo ko. Let’s go shopping. Para naman magkaron ng bagong
gamit condo ko. At pampaalis stress."

"Sus bat mo pa kasi naisipang lumayas sa bahay niyo eh? Ganda ganda dun eh.
Komportable pa buhay mo! Di tulad sa condo ng mom mo. Lagi pang take outs kinakain
mo dahil nga timang ka sa gawaing bahay," he bickered. Kung hindi lang talaga
masakit ang ulo ko, sasabayan ko 'tong si Kemp, e. Ang ingay!

"I just got tired of Dad and Angel, you know.. ugh never mind. Let’s not talk about
them anymore, Janice."

I started to arrange my things and checked my phone. No messages. Damn him. Hindi
man lang ba siya nag aalala na baka nagpakamatay na ako sa sobrang frustration?

"Hay Erika. Ewan ko sayo!"

"Let's just enjoy our therapy bebe! Let’s go!" Kemp said enthusiastically and then
kumapit siya sa braso ko.
--

"Forever therapy talaga ang shopping! Forever 21’s forever the best!” said Janice.
Ang dami na din pala naming nabili. Buti na lang at hindi pina cut ni Dad yung
cards ko. Swear, I'll go insane! Ang kapal naman kasi ng mukha nila kung
tatanggalan nila ako ng pera. Pera ng Mom ko 'yun. Wala silang karapatan. My Dad's
just a freaking layman when she met my Mom. Everything he has? It's my Mom's. 

"Yeah yeah. Next stop, Cotton On! Let’s go bebes!"

We were walking side by side with shopping bags on our hands when we passed by a
commotion at the middle of the mall.
At dahil dakilang tsismoso o tsismosa ba si Kemp ay syempre, tumigil siya para
makisawsaw.

What now.

"Gosh tara girls! Mukhang may gulong nagaganap! Let’s watch. Hehe," he said then
hinatak kami ni Janice. Wala naman kaming nagawa. Watching cat fights isn't my
thing. Too low for my liking. Mga low class na babae lang ang nakikipag cat fight.
Wanna know what's better than cat fight? Mental torture. That's just way worse.

"Hayop kang lalaki ka!! Pagkatapos mo kong buntisin, di mo ko papanindigan!! Anong

gusto mong mangyari?! Magpapakamatay ako o ilaglag ko tong batang to?! ANO!!
Sabihin mo! Papakasalan mo ko o magpapakamatay ako!"

I laughed. Hahaha! My day just lightened up. I'm not crooked. It's just that the
thought that someone is more miserable than I am keeps me going. Because hey, I
only got it bad. Someone somewhere got it worse. I should call myself lucky.

I continued watching them display their misery. Desperate much. Tsk tsk people
nowadays.

"Gina naman.. wag kang mageskandalo dito. Pagusapan natin to ng pribado..." the man
said and then he held her in the arm.

"E gago ka pala eh! Paanong di ako mageeskandalo kung di kita mahanap at mahuhuli
na lang kita ditong may babaeng kalantari! Pinagloloko mo ba ko! Tarantado kang
lalaki ka! PANINDIGAN MO TO!"

Tsk. I hate their language. So low class. 

"Ano ba yan Kemp. Sobra na yang pagkatsismoso mo! Tara na nga. Wala namang kwenta
yan eh," I said then faked a yawn.

"Whatever. Dami pa sinasabi netong babaeng to. Tara. Milk tea tayo."

--
"Oh, tahimik mo jan bebe? Nacarried away ka sa dramang napanuod natin? Hahaha!
Grabe talaga yun tsk tsk. Desperate measures at desperate times nga naman."

Hmm..

 "Do you think guys na, papakasalan nung lalaki yung babaeng yun?"

"Hanggang ngayon iniisip mo pa rin yan?"

I rolled my eyes at Kemp, "Duh. Can you guys just answer my question?"

"Hm sa tingin ko naman, oo. Syempre naman no. Konsensya niya na lang kung
magpakamatay yung babae noh. Mukha pa namang psychotic na yung girl. Mukhang may
problema na sa pagiisip yun eh."

Kemp faked a gasp and even clutched his hand at his chest. "Grabe ka Janice!
Psychotic agad?"

"E totoo naman eh... Did you see her face? Parang nakadrugs na ata. I bet di na
healthy yung baby na dinadala niya," Janice said in a worried tone. 

They continued bickering at each other while I stare at nowhere in particular,

thinking..
 Hmm.. Desperate measures at desperate times...

--
Chapter made by Erica Domingo @aciiire
Edited by Eydee Guzman @beeyotchWP

--- --- ---

Chapter 23
--
Chapter 23

Today, I decided to take a break and not to visit Dane in his office. I’m still
very pissed at him and I have to think over my plan. Ayoko naman na pumunta na lang
sa office niya and pag nakita ko si Allison, all hell will break loose. I have a
standard to maintain and I won't let Allison destroy that. She's not worth it.

I went down and try to take a dip at this condo’s pool na lang para naman matanggal
ang stress ko. Olympic pool naman siya kaya, pwede na.

I wore a rad 2 piece red bikini and pinatungan ko na lang ng sundress. Grabbed my
towel, sun screen, shades and phone then off I go to the roof top since the pool’s
located there. 

I was headin’ towards the available lounge chair that I saw when I heard a familiar
laughter that erupted in the air... I stopped in my tracks only to find Dane and
Allison on the pool. Together. Together. And when I say together….

They are fucking together?! How in the hell?!

I turned my back on the view behind me.

I don’t know.. It just breaks my heart every time. Every f-ucking time! Hindi ba
dapat ngayon, I'm already immuned to the pain? But why is that everytime, the pain
just gets worse... Too much for me to handle. 

I spotted a guy that was strutting towards my direction. I did a quick eval of his
face. He looks nice, this will pass.

Without a second thought, I grabbed him by the arm and dragged him to the lounge
chair I was suposed to sit on.

"Do you mind putting sun screen on my back?" then I smiled at him. Ew. If not for
the fact that I want to make Dane jealous, hinding hindi ako magpapahawak sa ibang
lalaki. I don't give a damn kung gwapo man yan. No one could touch me.

"Well, you already pulled me here Miss. But, who am I to say no to a beautiful lady
like you?" he said then he winked. Flirt. Tss.

I handed him the sun screen at tinignan ko uli ang direksyon nila. They were still
having the time of their lives and Allison the bitch is even slapping Dane on the
arm, flirtatiously. 

Urgh! Get your f-ucking hands off my man, you little b-itch! 

Just when I was about to lie on my front eh nakita kong sa wakas, he looked at my
direction. He was astounded for a moment but he focused his attention back to that
girl.
Curse you to hell, Allison! Nandito na ako, baring everything but in the end,
you're still the priority?! 

I just smiled at the guy again and humiga na ko and then I felt his rough, manly
hands covered with lotion, on my back. He was moving his hands up, down, side and
side.  I almost dozed off sa ginagawa niyang pagmamassage/apply ng lotion sa likod
ko.

It feels good...

Bumangon ako sa pagkakahiga only to find out na wala nang Dane at Allison! 

Where did they go?!

"Uhm mister,-" I said but then, he suddenly interrupted me.

"You can call me Ivan. And you are?” and he killer smiled at me. Flirt. As if naman
gagana sa akin yang mga pacutesy na ganyan. I grew up around good looking people,
I'm immuned with their charms. Won't work.

"Erika. Anyway, I was about to ask kung nakita mo ba yung lalaki at babae kanina na
nasa pool lang kanina? Have you seen where they went?" I asked him, not even
noticing that he keeps on making that seductive grin. 

"Didn’t see where they went.” Then he shrugged.

"Oh. Anyway, I have to go. Thank you for helping me with the sun screen."

"Aren’t you gonna go for a dip? I applied sun screen to you after all."

"I changed my mind. I have a commitment to attend to pala. It was nice meeting you
anyway. Bye." I was about to walk out when he stopped me by my arm. I turned to
look at him,

"Yes?"

"Can I at least, get your number?"

"I’m already taken. Sorry.”

I'm forever Dane's. Sorry, whoever you are. I don't have time. Mas mabuti siguro
kung kayo na lang ni Allison ang magsama!

Binilisan kong maglakad pabalik sa condo ko at baka maabutan ko pa sila. Nung wala
akong makitang anino nila, dumeretso ako sa lobby...

"Is there a condo owner here that’s named Allison Evans?"

"Wait mam, I’ll check." she said and then she punched in some letters, or numbers.
Damn! Ang tagal! Baka kung ano na ang ginagawa ng dalawang yun. "Yes mam. May condo
owner po na Allison Evans dito."

S-hit.

"Okay. Can I have her unit’s number?" keep calm, Erika. Keep calm.

"Sure ma'am. 513 po yung unit niya."

"Ok. Thanks.”
I tried to fly but I couldn't! Kulang na lang magmagic ako para makarating ako sa
fifth floor. Ugh! Bakit siya may condo? Does she plan on staying here for good?!
For good to ruin my life?!

The moment I stood in front of her unit, I calmed myself. No, Erika. You won't make
a scene this time. It will do you no good and you know you're way better than that.

I was about to press the doorbell button when I heard a thing na parang nabagsak.

"Ouch. Be careful Dane. And please, be gentle..."

"Mm. Sorry Ally. I promise to be gentle.”

And then I heard the most... disgusting moan I have ever heard in my life. F-ucking
bastards! Paano niyo 'to nagagawa sa akin?! Alam ko naman na hindi ako mahal ni
Dane but I am his girlfriend! He knows that I am his girlfriend! How could he be so
cruel? How could he kiss someone without even putting in mind that I could get
hurt?

I know I'm ruthless... but I have a heart. And my heart could only get crushed too
many times...

--
I immediately went to my unit after witnessing their scene. No, Erika. Don't create
a pity party for yourself. You're not like that. Make them pay. Make them f-ucking
pay.

The clock say 6 pm. Now's the time. You'll regret the day you met me, Allison. 

I put on my best clothes and headed straight to Dane's office. This bastard whom I
really love.

"Is Dane in his office?" I asked his annoying secretary.

"Yes mam. Do you need anything?"

"Nothing."

I went to the comfort room first and prepped myself up. You'll gonna be mine now,
Dane. After this, you can run but you can never escape me.

I remove the coat that acted as my cover up. I saw Dane's secretary gwaked at me
upon seeing my provocative attire. That's right, b-itch. Your boss will be mine
tonight. 

Nakita ko siyang nakaupo sa swivel chair niya habang nagbabasa ng paper works niya.

"Hey Dane." I sweetly said, but he didn’t even bother to look at me and he just
simply said, "Hi."

Patience is a virtue, Erika. Remember that.

"You want some coffee? I’ll make you one. You look so exhausted already," I said
with genuine concern. Kahit na ano ang gawin sa akin ni Dane, at the end of the
day, I still care for him. I'm such a fool in love.

"I’m fine."
"You should drink coffee. Para rin mawala antok mo," I said and then went to the
pantry to make him a cup of freshly brewed coffee.

"Okay, okay. Whatever," he replied non chalantly.

Why are you so cold, Dane? But when it comes to Allison, you're so much better...
You're so unfair...

This is your night.

Pumunta ako ng pantry at nagtimpla na ng coffee niya. Pag katimpla ko, sinilip ko
muna kung may ibang tao bukod sakin. And when I saw that the cost is clear, nilabas
ko yung dalawang maliit na bote. One is the ever clear and the other’s…. you don’t
wanna know.

Binuhos ko lahat content ng dalawang yun sa cup of coffee na tinimpla ko para lang
sakanya. I mixed it thoroughly with the tea spoon.

Pagkatapos kong iayos, lumabas na ko ng pantry at pumunta ako sa tabi ng inuupuan

niya.

"Here’s your coffee, Dane," I said and then I handed him his cup of coffee. After
getting his cup, he  glanced at me and then...

And there. He almost dropped the saucer and the cup of coffee when he finally took
in my appearance. Buti na lang naagapan ko.

How do I look?

I was wearing a bustier sexy top, super short skirt and a crisscross black
stockings. Matching it with a super red killer heels and smoky make-up. And my lips
are so red plus my hair’s messy styled.

This is how I play, Dane. Make me cry and I'll make you beg. These are my rules.

"W-what’s wit- never mind," he stuttered and then drank the really hot coffee in
one gulp. I make you nervous, huh? You're still a guy, Dane, and you cannot resist
me. 

"Whoa. Your tongue might get burned."

"Whatever."

I walked towards the sofa and sat there. I waited for the ‘coffee’ to take its
effect on Dane… After 3 minutes, parang nagdidilate na yung eyes niya. He even
loosened his tie.

That’s the sign.

I strutted towards his direction and I shamelessly sat on his lap. He’s now in
between my legs since nakaharap akong umupo sa lap niya.

He looks taken aback with my sudden attack. But he didn’t protest. I slowly ran my
hand on his hard chest. Up, down, up, down. That's right, Dane. Does it feel good,
huh?

He closed his eyes na para siyang nahihirapan na. Pero yung kamay niya nasa handles
parin ng swivel chair.
I unbuttoned his shirt and when I finished, I ran my hands over his exposed flesh.
I can already feel the bulge on my butt…

Then there, I kissed him senseless.

It’s really now or never.

--
Chapter made by Erica Domingo @aciiire
Edited by Eydee Guzman @beeyotch

--- --- ---

Chapter 24
--
Chapter 24

I’ve been so elated since that happened. I’m here at my condo right now, trying to
cook for the second time. I know I was a bitch for doing that, desperate, you may
say, but... when it comes to Dane, reasons just flew out of my mind. Being
reasonable is just damn too impossible.

There was no attemp from Dane to contact me since that night… and it's been two
weeks. Did he hate what we did that much? Much as it hurt, I love him. I love him
too much I think I'm bordering on obsession. I don't even recognize my own self!

He could make me feel special but he could also make me feel worthless. He's my
Dane. With just a single glance, he could make me or break me. It's fine but it's
very unfair because in my case, should I weep nor beg, I have no say with what's
happening in his life.

I stared at my window, thinking if he even remember what we did because for me? It
would be a painting permanently etched in my memory.

It was... special. 

I looked him in the eye and he was looking at me with the same intensity.

"Dane..." I uttered as I try to held his face. He's been very rough with me,
thrusting in and out without even thinking about my discomfort. Am I this worthless
that I can't even have a decent sex with my boyfriend? He's making me feel so
cheap...

He pushed inside me and tears came running down my cheeks. He didn't even budge. He
didn't even take a glance at me and reassure me that he's gonna take it slow and
everything is going to be fine. He just kept on rocking in and out, not minding me
for I was just Erika, that b-itch who is head over heels in love with him.

"Dane, please, please," I whispered, asking him to be gentle. I maybe a b-itch but
I am no w-hore. 

"F-uck," he cussed. He was biting his lips too hard that blood started to draw from
it. I rose from the swivel chair and kissed his bleeding lips. "Just take me, Dane.
I love you so much," I said in between my kiss.

He closed his eyes and started thrusting in and out, I think I'm going to die.

I placed my hands on his back and unconsciously scratched his back with my
fingernails. "Ugh!" With one final thrust, he passed out and slumped his back on
his swivel chair.

I was busy running for my dear breath when his secretary knocked. I'm really,
really going to fire her!

"Sir Dane? Can I go early today?"

"Fine, fine!" I shouted from here. D-amn! Did she hear us? .

I stared at Dane's sleeping face and kissed him. Dane, if you would just learn to
love me, we will be very happy. Mahal na mahal kita, e. Alam ko naman na si Allison
yung mahal mo, hindi naman ako tanga pero kahit na ganun, I can't stand the thought
of leaving you. You're just for me, and I'm sorry.

I'm sorry because after this, you will be bound to be mine forever.

We will make a happy family, my love. 

--
I was still busy cooking when someone rang the doorbell. I was disgusted with the
smell of burning onions that I threw up first before attending to whoever's ringing
that d-amn doorbell!

I washed my hands and mouth then I opened the door.

"Erika…"

Great.

Just, just great.

I gave him a straight face and closed the door behind me. There's no way in hell
that I'm gonna let him inside my place! Umalis na nga ako ng kusa dun sa bahay
niya, ngayon susundan niya pa ako hanggang dito? Does he want me restless?!

"What are you doing here?" I asked with a blank expression on my face. No, Dad. You
chose those b-itches over me and my Mom. Suffer the consequences.

"Please come home, Erika. Your dad and I.. we were so worried about you," Angel
said. I rolled my eyes at her and then she tried to hold my hand but I flinched.
"Ano ba!" I shouted at her. She was taken aback at my hostility so Dad put her
behind his back. I'm the villain, yet again.

"You suddenly disappeared, Erika! You didn’t even let us explain! We were worried
sick!" Dad said.

I began to laugh and mock them.

"Really, Dad? You're gonna put the blame on me now? You have your connections! Kung
gusto mo akong mahanap, mahahanap mo ako! But what? It took you weeks to talk to
me! And wanna know what that implies? That I am worthless. Who am I? Anak mo lang
naman ako," I said with disgust. Kung pwede lang, ayokong dalhin yung pangalan
niya. I'd rather be no one than be someone but hating my own self.

I continued, "Don't you tell me you're gonna explain because I'm not all ears, Dad.
I'm turning 20, for heaven's sake! Hindi na ako bata! I know what's best for me and
honestly, you and Angel will be the death of me. Kaya please, leave me alone!" I
said and then tried to shut the door on their pathetic faces.
But Dad didn't let me. "Erika! No. You’ll leave this place and come home with us,"
he said with full authority with his veins protruding in his neck. I'm stressing
him out and he's doing the same to me!

"No. I’ve decided. You can leave now," I said and then I finally shut the door on
their faces.

I maybe disrespectful but they started it. I can't even begin to think how they
managed to cheat on my Mom! Those animals! My Momy was nothing but kind pero nagawa
pa nilang lokohin! Looking back, wala akong maisip na dahilan para lokohin nila ang
Mommy ko. My Mom was a very loving wife to her husband and a very supportive friend
to Angel. They really disgust me.

Now that I'm planning to start my own family, I have no time for their bulls-hits. 

--
After ordering for Chinese since what I cooked spoiled my mood, I went to the mall
to unwind. I was about to enter Friday’s when I bump into someone.

"Watch wh--" I was about to give a whole lot of bulls-hit to the one who hit me
when i realized that it was no other than Tita Dana. "Oh, it’s you, Tita Dana!
Sorry po." I warmly smiled at her and kissed her cheek. 

"Hi there, Erika. How are you? Haven’t seen you since our last dinner at our
house," she said with a smile. She's so nice and everything. Bakit kaya si Dane
hindi makuhang maging mabait sa akin?

"I’m fine, Tita. Ikaw po? Are you with Tito Andy?"

"Oh, no. I was just about to go home… I have an idea. Why don’t you have dinner
again at ours? Dane took his day off. What do you think?" then she smiled. With her
smile, naalala ko si Dane. They look just the same. Tita Dana’s so beautiful. No
wonder Dane’s so… irritatingly handsome.

Should I go? What will be Dane’s reaction? Will he even remember what happened
between us?

If he didn't, I will make him remember.

"Okay, Tita. Sure. I have nothing on my plate naman po. Are we going now?" I
inquired.

"Yes, we are. Let’s go? I have my car parked just outside."

"Alright, Tita."

And we walked arm in arm outside the mall. See? She likes me. I just hope Dane
likes me, too.

--
When we entered their house, I can feel my palms sweating. 

I haven’t faced Dane ever since that night... he didn’t even bother contacting me.
I don’t know what to do. Maybe I shouldn't have accepted Tita Dana’s dinner offer. 

"Oh you’re home na pala Mommy. And you’re with Erika! Hi, Erika! Haven’t seen you
in awhile. Bakit di ka na bumisita ulit?"

Hinila ako ni Ate Alys sa may living room at tinanong ng tinanong. Ang cute talaga
ni Ate Alys. And ikakasal na siya sa lagay na yan.

"Alys! Is Mom home yet?"

I immediately froze once I heard his voice.

"Over here, Dane!" Ate Alys shouted.

Oh god.

S-hit.

"Erika’s here for dinner. Mom invited her over," she said while she embraced Dane
while I was on their sofa, busy freezing. 

My back’s on him so...

I slowly turned around to face him…

"H-hi, Dane." Then I smiled an uneasy smile.

"Kids! Dinner’s ready." 

Good thing Tita Dana interrupted. I don't think I'm ready to hear Dane's hash
remarks. I know he hates me but everytime he reminds me, the blow hits the same. It
freaking hurts.

"Come!" Then Ate Alys dragged me half willingly to their dinner table.

--
We were all tucked in to dinner table. Tito Andy also arrived and it seems that he
has just gotten off from work.

I was seated beside Dane and I swear I could really feel my heart beating so loud.

"So, how have you been, Erika?"

"I’m good, Tito," I answered politely.

"How about Mr. Garillo and Angel? Tagal ko na silang di nakakausap," Tito Andy
said.

My face fell into a frown but I managed to hide my disgust. I face him and smiled.
"They're doing fine, Tito." No, I hope they're doing worst.

We were busy with Ate Alys' upcoming wedding plans. She looks so radiantly happy.
Kailan kaya ako magiging ganyan kasaya? That's my only wish, yung maging masaya.
Bakit parang sobrang hirap niya abutin?

From my peripheral vision, nakikita kong kumakain lang naman si Dane at nakikinig
sa usapan... Parang wala namang bumabother sakanya...

Nung tapos na yung main meal, Tita Dana placed the huge chocolate cake on the
middle.

It doesn’t look very appealing to me right now. I suddenly hate chocolates now.

"Here," he said and then handed me a slice. But, since Dane was the one to give me
a slice, I’ll eat it, of course! I've done worse for him, ano ba naman ang kainin
'tong chocolate cake?

I've only had three bites but I already feel like vomitting it all out. 

Hold it, Erika. Don’t humiliate yourself in front of your future family for
Christ’s sake.

And on the 5th spoon, my tummy swirled. I rushed to the sink.

They all followed me, worried.

"What happened to you, Erika? Are you sick?" I felt Tita Dana’s hands on my back.
She was holding my hair from falling into my face. Ugh! Bakit ba kasi ang sama ng
lasa nung cake?

"Ayos ka lang? Masama ba pakiramdam mo, hija?"

"Are you alright?"

I was busy throwing up and then I washed my face and cleaned my hands. I faced them
and they all looked worried. Excluding Dane. He’s not even here…

"I’m fine po. Maybe I ate something lang," I said then I smiled to assure them.

"Maybe there’s something sa niluto ko? I’m sorry, Erika. I’ll make sure na maayos
na nex-" I cut her off. Kasi sure akong it has nothing to do with Alys' cooking. 

"No. No, Ate Alys. I just didn’t feel like eating the chocolate cake, so maybe,
that’s why."

"Are you sure? You shouldn’t have ate it-"

"Alys, can I borrow her for a minute?" Dane suddenly appeared holding me on my arm.

"Oh. Sure sure. I’ll clean up this mess na lang," Ate Alys said and then she winked
at me and hopped her way to the kitchen.

I faced Dane with a worried expression. "U-uhmm so, what’s up?"

--
Edited with love by Eydee Guzman
Made by: Erica Domingo

--- --- ---

Chapter 25
--
Chapter 25

Dane dragged me towards the stairs. He was holding my arm too hard, it feels like
it's going to bruise. He continued walking until we stopped in front of what I
assume is his bedroom.

He opened the door and pushed me in, not even minding that I might get hurt becase
f-uck it, babae ako! Nasasaktan ako sa paghatak hatak niya sa akin!

He freed my arm kaya hinawakan ko iyon. Ang sakit. Sobrang higpit ng pagkakahawak
niya sa kamay ko... He stared at me and so my heart started beating erratically
from anticipation of what he is going to say. 
He stared at me and placed both his hand on his temples and massaged them. Now that
I've got a good look of his devilishly handsome face, I noticed the dark circles
under his eyes. 

"Tell me, Erika. Did that happen? Did we do... that?" he asked, as if he's afraid
to hear what I have got to say.

What is with with having s-ex with me that disgusts him? Am I ugly? Am I fat? I
know he hates me but is it really that disgusting to have the though of him and me
together? 

I have long imagined how Dane would react once he realized that we actually did it.
Truth be told, all the imaginations that I formed inside my head were fairytale
like. Why? Because I know that that's where my fairytale love will prevail. Because
I live in reality. And the reality is too cruel for me because I know Dane hates
me. He hates every fiber I have in my body.

He stared at me, waiting for some kind of confirmation that he engaged in repulsive
intimacy act with me. It's... it's freaking making my head spin! Ano ba ang ayaw mo
sa akin? Kaya ko din namang maging mabait kagaya ni Allison! Hell, I'll be
everything you want me to be, Dane! Can't you see? I'm throwing every thing I have
in my life for you. Every thing. Every f-ucking thing...

"U-uhm..." I stuttered, not knowing how to break it into him without him
overreacting.

I don't know what words to say, how to say it. What we had was wonderful and I
don't want to taint that memory by remembering Dane's repulsed face when he learned
that it actually happened. It would hurt me, so painfully.

He cursed under his breath. "Tell me, Erika," he said, his voice full of anger and
despair. He held my arms and gripped it tightly that it's starting to hurt again.

"O-ouch," I uttered.

He looked at me and then loosened his grip. He breathe deeply and closed his eyes.
He walked towards his bed and sat on the edge. 

He sighed and resigned. 

"T-that... That shouldn't have happened, Erika! Ano bang pumasok jan sa isip mo?"
he shouted at me.

For the first time, he shouted at me. Dane shouted at me. 

"What if I get you pregnant? S-hit, Erika! Hindi ka ba nag iisip talaga?" he
exclaimed and threw his hands up in the air in frustration.  His words are like
daggers that have punctured my heart. Pain washed across my face but I immediately
hid that expression. 

He seemed deep in thought then afterwards, he became pale.

"D-dane?" I called out his name... Natatakot na ko sa mga reaksyong ipinapakita

niya.

He stood up and faced me. He held my face upward and looked me in the eye. "Are you
pregnant?" he asked me. He looks like he really didn’t want that to happen. Like
that’s the least thing he wanted to happen.
"No! No...  It can’t be. After all, its just been 2 weeks. That's impossible. There
must be something with what I ate. So, that must be the reason why I vomited..." I
reasoned out just to pacify him. I can't handle him being mad at me right now. Not
now when I'm starting to think that I might actually be pregnant.

I acted like I didn't want to be pregnant. Like, I'm horrified with that idea.

"Its just been 2 weeks, yeah. But, you need to see a doctor so we could be sure..
F-uck this. Did you plan this, Erika? Did you plan all of this so you could tie me
down?" he then again, gripped my shoulders. And it's really hurting me. He's trying
to calm down but he can't. He's really angry right now.

Dane looks murderous now.

"W-why would you think that, Dane? Why would I do such t-thing?" I mumbled and
stuttered. He's making me nervous and scared. This is not my Dane...

"Let’s see why… Why would Ms. Erika Garillo do such thing?" He said as if he's
mocking me.  

He's really scaring me.

"Maybe because... f-uck, Erika. Are you that jealous of Alli? Ikaw na yung
girlfriend ko, di ba? Wasn't that enough? Na kahit si Allison yung gusto ko, ikaw
pa din yung pinili ko?" he raised his voice.

This is so not Dane. This ain’t Dane..

"L-let go of me, Dane," that's all I managed to say.

Kasabay ng pagkasabi ko nun ay ang katok sa pinto ng kwarto ni Dane.

"Uhm, am I interrupting something? I was going to invite you for tea, guys. Pero
looks like, you both are busy," Ate Alys said.

Maybe if I was in ate Alys’ shoes, I’d thought that Dane and Me were having an
intimate moment. 

But it’s far from that..

Dane freed my arms and he sighed. 

"No. Erika needs to go home already. Her parent’s already looking for her," Dane
lied at her face. Can't he just say that hey, my girlfriend's pregnant! But no.
He's just to repulsed by the idea of me being the mother of his kid.

"Oh that’s too bad. Sige. Tara, paalam ka na kay Mom and Dad," she said then
hinatak niya na ko pababa.

I’m praising ate Alys in my mind right now. Thanks to her interruption because Dane
really wasn’t his usual composed, emotionless self a while ago. He looks… lost.
Really lost.

--
It’s been 3 weeks since that unfaithful dinner. And in that 3 weeks, I’ve only seen
Dane, four times. He’s not talking to me. He’s not even looking at me. It’s like,
he doesn’t even want to see me at all. 
Today’s my scheduled check-up. I didn’t try buying and using those pregnancy tests
for those aren’t reliable. Para sigurado, sa doctor talaga ako magpapatingin.

At ni hindi nga ako sasamahan ni Dane. You know how that feels? That, I’m feeling
scared and nervous all by myself?

Yeah. I admit that I’m scared. I’m scared of what may happen.. What if I wasn’t
really pregnant? What if my plan failed? 

After nung huling pagsuka ko sa dinner kila Dane nun na symptom of being pregnant
eh, wala na. Wala nang kasunod yun.

What if may nakain lang talaga ako nun kaya ako sumuka? Pano kung… wala lang talaga
yun.

I’m getting frustrated and nauseous now.

"Ms. Erika Garillo, you’re next," the nurse called out.

Here’s the moment of truth. I entered the ward and saw the lady doctor there..

"Good afternoon, Ms. Garillo. You can seat over there." She pointed the chair na
pang-ultra sound.

She started to ask me questions about sa symptoms na nararamdaman ko nung nakaraan.

After that, she asked me to remove my top and to lie down to the chair.  She then
applied the petroleum jelly like over my belly and started the process. The
feeling’s ticklish. And my heart pounding like a drum. I can even see it on the
monitor.

I looked at Dr. Ramirez and anticipated to what she has got to say..

"Ms. Garillo, you are..."

--
Edited by: Eydee Guzman
Made by: Erica Domingo

--- --- ---

Chapter 26
--
Chapter 26

I immediately went to Dane’s office once I heard the result. I don’t know what I’ll
react with what I heard. Should I be glad, relieved, nervous, or what? 

I was pacing back and forth inside the comfort room just outside Dane’s office. I’m
nervous. No, being nervous does not even suffice to what I am feeling. I'm... f-
ucked. Yeah, I'm f-ucked up. 

Once I gathered my strength, I retouched my already pale face and went out. You can
do this, Erika. You're Erika, remember? You already went through the worst, ano ba
naman 'to? 

Inhale and exhale, E. Don’t forget to do that.

Nakita na ko ng secretary ni Dane but she didn’t bother to stop or ask me what I’m
doing here anymore or if I have any appointment with Dane. She really should know
who I am by now. I’m her boss’s girlfriend so she should treat me with utmost
respect. 

I slowly opened the door for I am still nervous as hell. Then there, I saw Dane...

On top of Allison.

I felt all the energy and strength that I’ve gathered come crashing down on me. I
froze on my spot and watch Dane’s head lower on Allison’s face. But before I stab a
knife on my very own heart, I turned my back on that scene and scurried out of that
building. F-uck you, Dane! I f-ucking hate you!

--
I immediately went home and burst the tears out of my sockets.

I don’t know why I can’t stop the tears from falling… it’s either I can’t handle
the pain from what I just saw at Dane’s office anymore or because being too
emotional is a normal thing for pregnant women.

Yes. Yes, I am indeed pregnant. I can clearly remember what Dr. Ramirez exactly
said just moments ago...

"Ms. Garillo, you are… 5 weeks pregnant. Congratulations!!" That’s the only thing I
remembered sa lahat ng sinabi niya because after those words came out of Dr.
Ramirez’s mouth, everything was a big blur. I wanna be happy because I want this
child... but I know Dane won't like her. He hates me... but he should not hate our
child. 

I tried my hardest to stop myself from bawling my eyes out and fished for my
phone...

I dialled his number. I’m telling him that I’m pregnant.. I know I could trust him.
He won’t judge me of all people... 

("Hello?") His voice sounded like he just woke up from a nap.

"V-vance..." Although I tried my best to make my voice alright, I failed. It

sounded groggy and hoarse. I've been crying for hours. Nababaliw na yata ako! Why
do I keep pushing myself to the sole person on earth who hates my mere existence?
Dahil ba kapatid ko si Felice, dapat niya na din akong kamuhian? I don't even know
her! And I won't know her because she's dead! Bakit ko kailangang magsuffer sa
kasalanan na wala naman akong ginawa?

("Hey, Riks. It’s just 3 in the morning here. What’s up? Haven’t heard from you in
a while.")

Siguro dahil kakagising niya lang kaya he didn’t notice the difference in my voice.
Pero I know, maya maya, malalaman niya ring something’s up with me.

"How are you there? Have you met any girl?" I tried to sound as normal as possible.
Good thing my voice went back to normal.

He sighed then. ("No girl can ever, ever replace you, Riks. You know that...") How
could I tell him that I’m pregnant with Dane’s child if he’s telling me this? Bakit
ba hindi na lang si Vance? He loves me, he really loves me. The world is a crooked
place. You fall for someone who does not love you and you hurt the person who loves
you. 

I sighed. "Find a deserving, decent girl, move on and, forget about me, Vance. You
know you and I are impossible to happen."

"Yes.. yes. I know. But, you can’t tell me to, just find a girl, move on with her
and forget you. That ain’t easy. And impossible too, Riks."

Should I tell him now? I really need someone right now. I need someone to tell to
about all these. If not, I might go crazy already.

"Anyway, I called to tell you something important.. and, since you’re the most
trusted person in my life right now, I’m telling you this. And, you’re the first
person who’ll hear this.. okay?" I said and then bit my lips. This is it, E! You'll
either lose Vance or what.

("You’re making me nervous, Erika. Just tell me what you want to say.")

"Okay, okay.. uhm. I uh…" How do I blurt this out? Do I just say it?

Gee.

("Just tell me, Riks." I can hear impatience on his voice.

"I’m pregnant, Vance."

There. I said it. I tried my hardest not to burst into tears. No, Erika. Makakasama
sa baby mo yan, okay? Wala si Dane para alagaan ka so you better take good care of
yourself.

"Y-you’re what?!"

I sighed then I whispered, "I’m pregnant, okay? Pregnant. There’s a child? Growing
on my tummy?" I said like I was asking a question.

"A-are you f-ucking kidding me, Erika?! H-how..."

I wanted to joke that I got pregnant all by myself but I know better. Now is not
the time to kid. And so I waited.. waited for him to absorb what he learned.

"Who’s the father?! Goddammit!! Is it Dane? It’s Dane isn’t it?!" He screamed. He's
so angry. And I've never heard him angry. He's my Vance. He's calm and composed...
and he never gets angry. Until now.

"Y-yes. Who else would father my child?" I said and then I sobbed.

"F-uck, Riks! What the hell have you done?!" I can hear him pacing back and forth.
If he could, sure akong babalik siya agad sa Pilipinas. That's how much he loves
me, he'll fly ten airplanes just so he could see me. I'm so lucky... kung sana siya
na lang yung mahal ko.

"Calm down okay? I called because I wanted to talk to someone. Don’t lecture me.
Please," I pleaded. Him breaking down is the last thing I need in my life right
now. I feel so exhausted with everything.. just.. exhausted.

I heard him frustratingly sigh on the other line. "Fine. So, you haven’t told
anyone about this yet? Not even Dane?"

Di ko na sasabihin sakanyang I was about to tell Dane, but then I saw him about to
kiss another woman. No no. That’s no good. I’m sure he’ll come flying over here.
And he'll kill Dane.
"Not  yet.. But I’m planning to. Tomorrow. I’ll tell Dane..."

"I knew it! I knew Dane’s no good for you.. Jesus, Riks!"

"Let’s talk about this tomorrow again okay? I feel tired. I’ll take a quick nap." I
sat on my bean bag and massaged my temple. I feel like I'm gonna die with all these
stress around me. 

Maybe this’s an effect of being pregnant..

He sighed. "Okay. I’ll call you after 4 hours. We’ll talk. Seriously. Take care of
yourself, Riks."

Then the line went dead.

--
I woke up feeling rejuvenated.. but then, a picture popped out on my mind. 

Dane.. on top of Allison. Easily, my mood went from light to sour.

Today, I’ll finally tell Dane about our baby.. That sounded so good yet so
painful... Our baby…

I pushed all bad throughts aside and ate at a restaurant that has a healthy menu. I
need to take care of myself from now on for I’m not the only one who’ll eat the
foods that I’m eating. 

I need to have nutrients on my body. Kailangan kong bumawi ng kain. These past few
days pa naman, all I’ve been eating are takeouts. I need a real food.

While I was eating a while ago at some healthy-ish resto, Vance called.. like what
he promised. He pushed me to talk to Dad and tell him about me being pregnant. But
I didn’t budge. Not even a minute that I considered telling him I was already a
mom.

No, I won’t tell Dad and nor Angel.

After eating my meal, I went to some high place and, I unwind. I thought of what
I’ll say to Dane. On how I’ll spill to him that I’m pregnant. Then I went to his
office.

"Ms. Erika, Mr. Nathaniel’s not around. He didn’t attend office today."

My brows creased.

"Do you know why?" I asked. San na naman siya pupunta?

"Uhm no, Ma’am. Mr. Nathaniel didn’t call in."

"Kay," I said. Lumabas na ko ulit ng building.. where could he be? Dane not
attending office is a miracle. He’s too workaholic not to attend a day at his
beloved office. Too workaholic.

Maybe he’s at their house?

--
Napadpad na ko dito sa harap ng bahay ng Guzman. I pressed the doorbell, and the
maid answered.
"Uhm.. is Dane home?" I politely smiled

She led me inside, and I sat on their sofa.

"Ay wala pa po siya dito Ma’am Erika. Kanina laang ay kasama niya yung si.. Alli ba
yun? Pero baka pauwi na rin ho si Sir Dane."

I felt pain on my chest once I heard that girl’s name. S-hit. You can’t cry right
now, E. Not in front of their maid.

"A-ah . I’ll wait for Dane na lang po. Is it okay?" I feel really tired. I don't
wanna be angry. I don't want to feel anything. I just wanna sit... and forget every
pain.

"Oo naman po Ma’am! Wala nga lang rin po sila Ma’am Dana. Ako lang ho ang naiwan
dito. Teka lang ho, ipaghahanda ko lang po kayo ng meryenda. Ano po bang gusto
niyo?" the maid offered.

I waved my hand. "It’s alright. Just tea po. Thank you."

She made her way to the kitchen and returned after a few minutes with a cup of tea
on her hand. I thanked her and told he I’ll be fine here waiting for Dane to
arrive... I’ve been staring at the whole interior of the Guzman’s house for I don’t
know how many minutes already.. I think I even memorized where the furniture or
displays are placed. 

I checked the time on my wristwatch and saw that I’ve been waiting for 3 hours
already.. it’s already 7 pm na rin. That long? Tsk and he’s with that freaking
girl...

Oh no. Don’t let a tear fall. 

Is it really like this when pregnant? I cry damn too much. Dati, kaya ko namang
pigilin kahit na sobrang sakit na. Pero ngayon, tuloy tuloy bagsak ng luha ko. 

Kahit na sobrang sakit, hindi ako iiyak. I don't cry. I already let him hurt me, I
won't give him the satisfaction of seeing meshed my precious tears.

I walked to the garden to breathe some air.. The stars are breath taking, as usual.
I sat on the grass and lay down.

I stared at the stars and automatically, Dane’s face popped. Dane... You’ll be
mine, soon. You’ll be tied to me. And I’ll make you fall hopelessly in love with
me. I just wish that you’ll soon come around. 

--
I felt like someone’s poking me so I opened my eyes and I realized na nakatulog na
pala ako!Tumayo na ko mula sa pagkakahiga sa lawn ng garden nila Dane.

"Ma'am nandito po pala kayo. Akala ko’y umalis na kayo kanina pa. 11 na ho ng gabi.
At wala pa rin po si Sir Dane..."

"Ganun po ba? I’ll wa-" I said but then I heard his familiar voice.

"Mom?" I heard him calling her Mom.

That’s Dane. I could never mistake his voice for another's.

"Nandyan na pala si Sir Dane. Maiwan ko na ho kayo Ma’am Erika ah?" she said and
then left me there.

Naglakad na ko papasok ng living room... And there he is, sitting on the sofa while
resting his back on it, eyes closed.

"Dane..." I softly called out his name. He opened his eyes... he looks tired.

"What’s the result?" Yan agad talaga ang greeting niya sakin. He’s really cold.
Really, really cold.

"Can’t I sit down first?"

"Just tell me the damn result, Erika!"

I flinched. I breathed deeply and said, "I’m positively p-pregnant. 5 weeks."

He lost his color..

"Who’s pregnant?" I turned… only to see Tita Dana and Tito Andy, bewildered, on the
door step…

--
Edited by Eydee Guzman
Made by Erica Domingo

--- --- ---

Chapter 27
--
Watch out for the series of update. LOL. I 've decided to keep this in English
because... uh whatever. :DD I'll translate the earlier chaps when I have time which
is uhhh XD :DDD Follow me in twitter! @beeyotchWP 

Chapter 27

My wrists were hurting…

I looked at Dane, he looks painfully handsome. He tried to cover up his face with a
smile and faced Tita Dana. His hold really hurt but I smiled as if it felt nothing.
“Who’s pregnant?” Tita Dana repeated her question. Dane glanced at me nervously. 

“P-pregnant?” I reiterated what Tita Dana said. “W-who mentioned about pregnancy,
Tita?” I asked her apprehensively. 

She seemed to buy my pathetic excuse and gave me a shrug. “Hah. I thought I heard
something… Must be sign of aging, ha?” she joked. “Anyhow, I’m here to say good
night. I have a long day ahead tomorrow. See you soon, Erika?”

I smiled at her and gave her a peck on the cheek. “Of course, Tita…”

As soon as she was gone from our vision, Dane pinned me on the wall, again. This
time, it really hurt…

“Pregnant or what? Come on, Erika!” he hissed.

I tried to push him away but he would not even budge. He immobilized me so there’s
really not much that I could do besides to tremble with fear for myself and for my
baby.

“What does it matter, Dane?” My voice almost broke off. I hated crying but
nowadays, crying seems to snaked its way in my daily routine. I would cry when I’m
alone, I would cry when I think about Dane, I would cry when I realize how fucked
up our situation is… I freaking cry a lot.

His breathing hitched and he rested his hand on my shoulder. “You’re pregnant,” he
stated. It does not take a genius to figure that one out. We had sex and he knows
it. “What the hell,” he uttered under his breath. 

I want to scream at him and punch him and kill him. Does having a baby with me
sucks that much? I see disgust and humiliation all mixed up on his face! Am I that
detestable? I could not even remember what made him hate me to this level! I hate
Allison to the heavens but I swear I never intended to harm her… It must be Felice,
that nasty bitch.

“I’m not going for an abortion, Dane,” I told him, point blank. I know how much he
hates me but there is no way that I will let him bully me into aborting my baby!

He stared at me with a confused expression. “What?”

I took a deep breath and gathered all the courage I could muster. “Dane, I know how
much you hate me but aborting my baby is never an option!” I almost screamed right
at his face.

It took him exactly five seconds to process what I have said. “What the hell are
you talking about?” he yelled. “I know how rash I am towards you but what the hell!
Did you really think I would ask you to abort my baby?” he said, emphasizing every
word. ‘My baby,’ ha, Dane? The last time I checked, you almost wanted to choke me
to death for being pregnant! Now, you’re going to play the concerned father card
against me?

“You couldn’t exactly blame me, you player! You couldn’t expect me to expect you to
be all jolly because you’re going to be a father! You slept with your ex-girlfriend
even after you took my virginity, Dane!” I spat out. I shouldn’t be angry but he’s
pushing all my buttons!

He looked shocked.

“Oh, yes, Nathaniel Dane, I saw you making out with your dear Allison. I’m not
stupid, Dane, but you’re treating me like one…” I said, on the verge of breaking
down. I hate feeling weak… I hate it so much… I hate it but even though Dane
constantly makes me feel imbecile and foolish, I can’t find it in my heart to hate
him. I could hate him right now but I’m pretty sure all my walls will come crashing
down with just one glance from him. I hate how much he could toy with me.

Tears came down my cheeks unceasingly. I took a step forward and pointed my finger
at his chest. “I’m giving you a way out now, Dane. Take responsibly or walk away.”

He looked at me intently. “You’re asking me to choose?” he asked.

I want to laugh at him. I’m not giving him a choice! I’m asking him to make me
happy or to spare me from misery. I can handle being a single mother but I can’t
handle him making a fool out of me. If he wanted out, I would give it to him, right
now. Hard as it may, I’ll back off. I will let him and his dear Allison alone. I
want to start anew… I’m going to be a mother but I don’t want my child to have a
dysfunctional family. I’d rather raise him alone than for him to see us fighting
every single day.

“Please, just choose, Dane…” I almost whispered. I am so tired, physically,

mentally, and emotionally. My life has been an emotional wreck and I’m afraid I
can’t handle much more.

I hate swallowing my pride much as I hate Felicity but I hate being pitied upon
much, much worse. 

My heart figuratively jumped out of my chest when I saw Dane on his knee.

“Marry me, Erika.”

--

Tita Dana was giving both of us a piece of her mind.

“Dane! You just got out of college but you’re--- God, Andy, get me a glass of
water!” she ordered Tito Andy. She looked at me and shook his head, disappointment
evident on her face.

Dane held my hand and suddenly, everything felt okay. “Mom, stop shouting at
Erika.” He said at his Mom. Tita Dana was taken aback by Dane’s hostility. Me,
myself, was shocked. Dane was the sweetest son any mother could ever wish for… it’s
a surprise how he managed to shout at his mother. “Need I remind you that you had
Ate Alys when you were 22? I’m 22, Mom.”

Shocked would undermine what I saw on Tita Dana’s face. “Dane?” she asked,
confusion and anger on her face.

Dane muttered an apology to his Mom, he still could not handle his Mom. “Mom, I
won’t let Erika be pregnant without a husband. Didn’t Dad do the same for you?
Please let me extend the same courtesy to Erika…” he pleaded.

Three deep breath were all it took for Tita Dana to give us her blessing. “You sure
you are not going to regret this, Dane?”

Dane looked at me and gave me a small smile. “I think I am.” 

Tita Dana talked to me after she asked Dane to leave us alone. “Erika,” she said.
“You know I like you but… are you sure about this?” She asked me, her voice etched
with worry and concern.

I gave her a smile though I am not sure about this, at all. It seems like a path
way down to an even more complicated life, but I’ll gamble. “Love is a gamble,
Tita. I’ll take my chances with Dane.”

She held my hand as soon as I gave her my response. 

“I once fell in love with this guy, Erika. I loved him a great deal but in the end,
he still chose this other woman. I am telling you that, even though people believe
that love can be forgotten, sometimes, loving someone is just a pit-hole you could
never get out from. When you fell in love with someone, you just can’t rub the
feeling off…” she said.

Funny how it seems exactly the same for me… and for Dane. I love him enough for me
to go to this length the same way he loves Allison enough for him to crush my heart
into millions of pieces. Aren’t we a match made in heaven? 

“Tita…”

“Erika, I am Dane’s mother, I know about Allison and about you. I like you both;
it’s just that I don’t want you to suffer the way I suffered before.”
“Are you happy with Tito Andy, Tita?” I asked her, she gave me a big smile. “Then
I’ll be happy with Dane, too. Trust me on this one.”

--- --- ---

Chapter 28
--
Talk to me on twitter! @beeyotchWP and I already finished translating the first 2
chapters, check it out when you have time, or if you want. Anyhow, I'd love it if
you leave a comment :DDD 

Chapter 28

It was hotter than usual. I was used to the chilly feeling since December was
already fast approaching but today, it was like the degree decided to go up higher
than what I expected. 

“How about this one?” asked Gabbie as she showed me a really, really ugly dress.

I gave her one annoyed look. “Really, Gabbie? Puffed sleeves?” 

She sighed and then rolled her eyes. She went back to the rack and placed that
abomination to the history of bride’s maid dresses I have ever seen. “Well, sorry
to burst your bubbles but I am not exactly the bride’s maid every bride dreams
about,” she spat. 

“Yeah, I know.”

She glared at me and I gave her a mocking laugh.

We’re here at some dress shop down town. Originally, Tita Dana offered me that
she’ll pay for the dresses but I refused. I don’t really know what has gotten into
me; I actually refused her even though I know that I don’t have the capacity to
pay. Ugh. I should really think before deciding. 

She asked me when they could come to our house to ask for my hands, formally. I
still haven’t told them that right now wasn’t a very good time. I don’t have a plan
to speak to my Dad nor to Angel. I still hate them both.

Dane was being… Dane. He treats me just the same, maybe a little better. 

“What about this?” she asked me, holding a relatively decent dress. 

I nodded. “Yeah, that could work.”

She groaned. “Finally! This is like the fifth dress I have shown you! You’re so
vain, you know that? It actually hurts.”

I smiled at her as I flipped the pages of the wedding magazine I was holding. “A
woman gets married only once, Gabbie. I better make it perfect.”

She gave me a shrug and went inside the fitting room. While I was waiting for her,
my phone vibrated. It was a message from Vance. 

From: Vance
Hey. How r you?
I smiled at his text. Even though I literally pushed him away, he still cares. I
wonder what could have happened if I chose him? I’m sure he wouldn’t hurt me. Vance
is a really great guy. The woman he’ll marry will be the luckiest one, I’m definite
about that.

‘I’m fine, Vance. How are you there?’ I replied. It took less than a minute for him
to reply. I wonder when I will be Dane’s priority. I wonder when he will think
about me before anything else. Will it ever happen?

From: Vance
I’m fine here. I’ll go to Manila soon. Wait for me, Riks…

‘I thought you’re gonna stay there? Pls don’t go here for me. I’d hate to keep you
from your plans.’

Minutes passed, he still hasn’t replied. Maybe he got tired of me, as well. I’m now
starting to believe that knowing me alone is tiresome. Maybe loving me is
exhausting. I’m such as cursed person. 

Vance
Calling…

I was apprehensive to answer his call. Should I? I know he still has his feelings
for me and I really, really don’t want to lead him on. I know how it feels, and it
sucks big time. But I need my best friend right now… He’s one of the things that
make me keep my sanity intact. 

“Hello?”

He sighed. (“Erika, what’s wrong with you? Are you really gonna marry that
douche?”) I laughed at him. He still hates Dane, doesn’t he? (“Stop laughing at me!
What? Are you really marrying him?”)

Three deep breaths, my doctor said. “Yes, Vance. I’m marrying him. Can’t you just
be happy for me?”

And then there was silence… 

(“Erika…”)

I stopped him before he could continue what he was saying. “Please, Vance, let’s
not go down this road again, alright? I love you, but only as a friend. I chose
Dane so please support me. I’d hate for us to fight. It’s getting restless and
pointless…”

He’s my friend and I know even though I tell him almost every chance I got that we
will never be together, he will never give up. He’s as stubborn as I am. 

(“You know I’ll never like him for you.”)

“I know. No one’s good enough for me,” I said because that’s what he always says to
me. ‘Erika, no one is ever going to be good enough for you. Even I couldn’t
compare.’

(“Yes, that’s right. But please, don’t marry him…”)

“Vance…”

(“Erika, I loved you and I still love you and I will always love you. Please keep
that in mind. I’m hanging up,”) he said and then ended the line. What am I gonna do
to you?

--
It was past four in the afternoon when I returned back to my condo. I was literally
in need of extra hands right now. I bought almost all the pretty things my eyes
saw. I think if my baby’s gonna be a boy, he’d hate me for buying too many pink
things for him. Oh, well. 

“Where were you?” There’s no need to even look at the person who spoke. I know him.
His voice, his face, everything about him is so familiar that it actually hurts.  

Putting down the shopping bags, I faced him. “I was out with Gabbie, why?”

“Pack your things, I’m bringing you home.”

My eyebrows automatically shoot up upon hearing what he just said. “You’re gonna
what?”

He roamed around my unit and finally, found my suitcase. It was lying on the corner
since it has only been weeks since I moved here. I still haven’t got the time to
arrange my things, actually. 

“Wait, what are you doing?”

I looked at me like what I was asking was actually pretty obvious. “I’m packing
your things?”

“But why?” I couldn’t help but ask. He didn’t really want to marry me so why speed
things up, right? What will he get once I moved in to their house? He’s gonna see
me every single day. Every day.

He faced me and boy, he looked so serious. “Erika, I know I did pretty hateful
things towards you but can’t you put that behind us? I’m actually the father of
your child so what makes you think I’ll leave you alone?”

For a minute, I doubted who was in front of me. Was he really Dane? What… what the
hell happened?

“And stop looking me like that. Yes, I can be a douche but I can be a gentleman
when I want to. Stop gawking, Erika. I’m gonna be your husband so don’t flinch at
everything that I’ll do.” 

--- --- ---

Chapter 29
--
Talk to me? @beeyotchWP twitter! :)) Dedicated to Ate Jovie for being my awesome
editor for Hindi Ko Inakala! Thanks a bunch, Ate! :D Look! There's Dane and Erika!
---->

Chapter 29

“Since you two are still, well, technically, single, this is your room,” said Tita
Dana as she opened what I assumed will be my room.

The room was certainly not as big as my room in our house but this would do. The
wall was covered with pale brown wall paper with wood-ish brown accents. There were
coffee table, dresser, and a queen size bed. I could get used to this, I think.

We stepped inside the room while I roamed my eyes around. So… there’s really no
backing out now, huh?

“So?” Tita Dana said, as if she was waiting for my judgment. “What do you say?”

I gave her a smile and nodded. “This is perfect. Thanks, Tita,” I timidly answered.

She opened her arms and nudged me to go give her a hug. “We’re gonna be a family so
why not start calling me Mom, huh?” Blush immediately crept up my face as I heard
her say that. I tried to cover it up by looking down but Tita Dana cupped my face
and smiled at me. “Don’t be shy now. I may be against this wedding at first but you
can’t really blame me. You’re taking away my baby boy.”

I glanced at Dane and he rolled his eyes at his Mom’s response. Seeing him like
this made me want to cry. The Dane that I knew was cold-hearted and will never
crumble at anyone’s expense but when he was with his family, he’s really warm and
loving. Will he show me his soft side? I hope so… I don’t want him as my husband; I
want him as my better half. What good will a marriage certificate do me if he will
still be aloof? It will be a bullshit arrangement. Estrange husband? Might as well
be unmarried, after all. 

“Mom…” I uttered.

“Now, that sounds a lot better.”

She helped me arrange my things while Dane returned to his room which was just
beside mine’s. Tita Dana seemed to be really happy with me being pregnant, well,
maybe because her only daughter was already married and Dane’s so far from being a
baby. Their house certainly needed a cute, little baby.

“How’s the dress hunting?” Tita asked me.

“It’s still… well, finding the perfect dress is hard,” I admitted. “But we’ll
manage,” I assured her. I don’t want to come off as useless. I may be pregnant but
I’m most definitely not invalid. 

I got my clothes from my bag. Seemed like they’re going to be worthless for a while
because soon enough, I will be bloated as fuck and it’s scaring me shitless,
already. Weight has always been an issue for me. I run and go to gym regularly to
scrap off unwanted body weight but look at me, still being able to smile despite
the fact that a month from now, I’m going to— yeah, I don’t want to think about it.
Come what may; que sera sera. 

“Just give me a call. I’m practically your Mom now, Erika. You can count on me
whenever.”

I smiled at her response. She’s my Mom… I liked how that sounded. Mom.

“I’ll keep that in mind, Mom.”

We spent another hour and a half arranging my things. Who would have thought Dane
managed to get all my things? I’m pretty sure my unit looks naked as hell. He even
managed to get my toiletries! As if I’m going to need those; the comfort room
inside my room was already prepped up with European brand. Yes, that’s right: I am
going to marry one hell of a loaded guy. Lucky me.
Soon as we were done with my stuff, we went down for dinner. Ate Alys was supposed
to be here but she’s still in her honeymoon. Tita Dana said she’ll welcome me once
she’s back—which was a month from now. Anyhow, this will be the first time I will
have dinner inside the Guzman’s manor as their future daughter-in-law. 

“I asked Manang to prepare crustaceans. I hope you’re not allergic?” She asked me.
“If you are, there’s a steak, well-done.”

Well, the term dinner would not suffice… it was a damn feast! 

“I practically eat anything,” I respond. White lies are still lies but what the
hell. I don’t want to strike them as a picky eater so I’m gonna shove down my
throat whatever they prepared for me.

I was about get crabs for myself when Dane did it for me.

“Anything else?” he whispered.

“Why are you whispering?” I asked him.

He rolled his eyes at me. “Quit asking questions, will you? Anything else?” he
reiterated his questions. I shrugged, not really in the mood to eat. “Brat,” he
commented whilst piling foods on my plate. 

“Whoa! That’s too much!” I exclaimed.

He placed it down in front of me and got me a glass of water. “You’re pregnant,

Erika. Eat for my son.”

I smiled to myself. My son… Damn it sounded so good!

Tita Dana and Tito Andy was busy talking about some merging stuff and I was never a
fan of business speak so I entertained myself watching Dane crack the crab shells
for me. He’ll make a good husband but he’ll surely make a heck of a father. 

“Can I have wine?” I asked him while I was busy munching crab meat.

He looked at me and his brow automatically raised. “No.”

“What? Just one glass!”

“You’re stubborn and you’re pregnant, and that’s not a good combination.”

I snorted at him. “You’re the father and you’re not making the mother happy, and
that’s a bad combination.”

He shook his head at my response. I was beginning to like this set up… it felt
surreal, almost too wonderful I was beginning to be afraid. What if one day, the
world decided to pull their ‘there’s-no-such-thing-as-pure-happiness’ crap on me? I
don’t think I will be able to stand up again. 

He filled his glass, half-way. “One sip and you’re done.”

I smiled at him and drank my wine. “Thanks, Dane…” I said, with all my sincerity. 

He took a deep breath and smiled back. “No problem, Erika.”

Dinner went by fast. We never got the chance to plan the wedding because something
came up with their company so Tito Andy went back to their office for emergency
meeting. I thought Dane will come, as well, but he said his Dad could handle it. 

After devouring those well-cooked dish, I went out for some fresh air. Of course, I
bid my good night to Tita Dana first. 

“Aren’t you going to sleep? It’s past eight.”

“I sleep past 12 midnight.”

I felt him sitting beside me as his musk embraced my sense of smell. Dane’s
personal scent sometimes drives me insane. He smells so nice that I wanna hug him
all the time, but of course I could not do that. I know he doesn’t love me and
clinging to him like some bitch will only drive him further. 

“Then we’re gonna have to change that,” he said with a chuckle that I rarely hear. 

I tilted my head and looked at him, confusion all over my face. “Dane, are you
seriously going to marry me?”

He nodded, but his nod alone was not enough. I was still freaking scared… Scared
that one day, he’ll finally realize that marrying me was a mistake and he’ll want
out. And the day when he’ll ask me to let him go will be the day that I’ll ask him
to kill me, instead, because by then, I’m already in deep shit. By then, I’m
already in love with him… deeply, madly, and irrevocably in love with him.

“I won’t hide our baby, Dane… If that’s what scares you, I’m telling you no. You
can see Eriel even if we’re not married,” I said.

His lips curved up. “Eriel? He’s a she?”

I nodded. “She’s a she, she can’t be a he.”

“I want a boy,” he sheepishly said but asfter a while, he uttered, “Screw gender; a
boy or a girl, whatever as long as she’s healthy.”

And there, my question was forgotten. Damn, I’m gonna marry this man. 

--- --- ---

Chapter 30
--
Uunahan ko na kayo, minamadali ko na 'to. Hahaha the end is freaking near! Enjoy
reading. Didn't proofread this because tinatamad ako. Okay. Thanks! :D

Chapter 30

They say that in life, there is no guarantee. I believe in that. For everything
that I have in my life, I bet that sooner or later, it will be gone, one way or
another. Now, with Dane right by my side, I am afraid. I am so afraid that one day,
I’m going to wake up and will find him gone.

These things worry me so much. It’s been a few weeks since I moved in here but
still there’s a feeling inside me that keeps my anxieties intact. It’s as if
everything will come crashing down one day. And it’s killing me.

Dane does his best to make me feel loved; I know that for a fact. But every time he
goes out, I feel neglected and cheated on. There’s always this scene in my head
wherein Allison and Dane laughs at my face, telling me what a fool I am. Fuck this
life!
“Are you ready?” he asked me for the nth time. We’re supposed to go to the hospital
for my check-up. I don’t want to leave because I’m feeling under the weather. I
can’t sleep at night because I fear that Dane’s gonna sneak out to meet with
Allison. I’m not dumb; I know he still loves her.

I shook my head as response. “Can we re-sched?” I asked him. Right now, I just want
to go to my bed and cuddle with my pillow.

My life has been an emotional wreck since. Dad and Angel went to visit me and to
convince me to go home. What a lovely couple they are. They make me seriously sick.
How could they just snoop in and ask me to go home? Have they forgotten what they
did to me? They took me for a fool! Did they think I wouldn’t know that they
cheated on Mom when she was still alive? And not only that, they had a daughter,
for Christ’s sake!

So my answer is still no, and will always be no. Even if Dane decides to abandon
me, I’ll never go back to that cursed house or I’ll be damned.

He placed his hand on my forehead and looked at me worriedly. “Are you feeling
okay?” he asked.

I nodded and gave him a small smile. “I just want to rest…”

“Okay,” he said and then led me back to my room. He tucked me in my bed and kissed
my forehead. “Do you want something? I’ll be out.”

I pursed my lips. I don’t want anything. I just want you here, with me.

“No, I’m good,” I answer.

“Hmm, okay. If you need anything, there’s Manang. Or, I’m also one call away.”

I nodded at him and watched him walk out.

--
“Someone’s waiting for you outside…” Manang said. I looked up and asked her who
could it possibly be. I’m not expecting anyone as of the moment. “Miss Allison…”

At the mere mentioning of her name, my insides clenched. Shit. I really hate her!

“I’ll be downstairs,” I said as I motioned her to leave me alone.

My hands were trembling. Shit. You need to get yourself together, Erika! You can’t
lose yourself in front of this woman, you hear? You could never, ever show her your
weakness. You need to be strong... not only for yourself but for your future
family, as well.

I stare at the mirror in front of me and counted three.

Okay, you can manage this.

Slowly, I made my way to the receiving area. There, I saw Allison sitting with an
envelope on her lap. Gee, please, calm your nerves down.

“What do you want?” I asked her immediately. I didn’t want for her to stay any
longer. The sooner she leaves, the better. I don’t know how I would handle seeing
her and Dane reunite. With that scenario, maybe stabbing myself would be a lot
better.
She stood up upon seeing me. “Erika…” she said, almost whispering.

My brows automatically shoot up the moment I heard her voice. What is it with her
that Dane finds so amusing? I’ll give it to her. She’s pretty… and nice. But is
that enough for me to get my heart broken over and over again? Where the hell is
justice?

I sat down and watched her study me. Yes, Allison. I am obviously pregnant.

“Speak,” I commanded.

“Erika…” she said, again.

I stared at her intently. Seeing her like this’ already bad, I wonder up to what
extent my hatred could manage.

“I don’t have all the time in the world, dear Alli. Speak now or get lost,” I
seethed.

She looked at me and breathed. With unsteady hands, she handed me the envelope she
was holding.

“What is this?” I asked her.

She remained quiet so I opted to check what the envelope has to offer.

“Shit…”

I didn’t know when or how I started to cry but I did. Tears started falling before
I even knew it. Like river that couldn’t stop its flow, my tears made its way on my
face.

“H-how…” I said, my voice breaking.

I knew perfectly there’s no happily ever after, I even prepared myself knowing that
one day, all these would come to an end. I know that one day, Dane’s gonna leave
me. I know that… yet the pain was still the same. Funny to think that even though
your mind was prepared for the worst, still, when the time comes, the effect still
devastates you. Devastate you to the point of destruction.

Her face gave away what she’s feeling. She pitied me. Too late for pitying,
everything’s gone.

“S-sorry, Erika… I don’t want to lie…”

“You should’ve lied!” I shouted.

“Erika…”

I stood up and threw the envelope at her face. “We’re getting married, Allison!
Just two weeks! Two fucking weeks… Shit. Why do you always have to ruin things for
me?”

Her eyes went wide. “Erika, oh, my god!”

My mind couldn’t concentrate, all I could ever think of was Allison being pregnant,
Dane cheating on me, them laughing behind my back. I am such a fool! How did I ever
believe that maybe, Dane loves me, after all. That all those things he did for me
is because he has finally learned to love me.
My head felt dizzy, my vision was swirling.

She pointed her fingers at my legs. “Erika! Oh, god. Manang, please call the
driver!”

What the hell was happening?

I looked down and saw blood running down my thighs. Shit. My baby. 

--- --- ---

Chapter 31
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Pls do comment, okay? Haha! Patapos na e, wag na silent reader! Ilabas niyo galit
niyo kay Dane! Lmao. Last chapter coming in later! Later, later yung epilolgue
naman! :DDD Love you allll mwaaah hahaha!

Chapter 31

I woke up with my head feeling like it was being pounded with a hammer. I looked
around and noticed that everything was white. Where the hell am I?

I tried to move my hands but someone was holding it. I need not to think who was
gripping my hand. His brownish hair gave it all away. This bastard.

Yanking my hands away from him, he woke up. “Erika!” his voice was laced with
surprise. Guess he was wishing he’ll never have to see me again. I guess he wished
I was dead.

Tears started forming again. Fuck this life! Why do I always have to cry? I’m damn
tired and exhausted of crying and hurting and breaking!

“Go away,” I whispered. I didn’t have the energy to push him away.

He went near me and tried to hold my hands. “Erika…” he called my name again.

I covered my ears with my hands and tried to tune him out. But still, I could his
pleads.

“Please talk to me,” he said.

Sobbing, I answered, “Just… please go away, Dane.”

He shook his head and looked straight into my eyes. “No. We have to talk, Erika.”

I shifted and got the oranges from the side table and threw it right at his face.
“You, asshole! Get the hell away from me! I don’t want to see you ever again!” I
shouted.

The nurse seemed to have noticed my shouting so she entered my room. “What’s
happening?” she asked.

I got the nerve and pointed at Dane. “Make him go away.”

She looked at Dane and back at me. Maybe she thought we’re having a lover’s spat.
Well sorry to break it out but we’re not lovers! What we were? No, there was never
us. It was just me trying to be in his life and him treating me like a toy. He
wants me because he can have me but in reality, he doesn’t want me. If in anyway
someone will give him a reason not to want me, I’m sure he’ll drop me like a hot
potato… like what he did to me last night.

“Sir, if you may…” she said to Dane.

Dane looked at me and sighed. “We’ll talk later.” I turned my back at him and cried
silently.

Minutes passed and the memories of yesternight flooded me. Oh, god! Eriel!

I immediately called the attention of the nurses. I was yelling at them, asking me
about my baby. What the hell? If I didn’t ask, would they never inform me about why
the hell am I here and what the hell happened to my Eriel?

“Calm down, Miss Garillo,” the doctor told me.

I wanted to strangle her. How could I calm down? I have no idea what happened to my
baby! I placed my hand on my tummy.

‘It’s alright, Eriel.’ I whispered.

 
She sighed and looked at whatever she was holding. She started speaking and my mind
couldn’t comprehend anything. All I could hear was miscarriage and loss of blood
and stress and every other word blurred.

I clutched my hand on my chest; I can’t breathe.

“Miss, are you fine?” they asked.

Tears were falling. Damn. I screwed up…

“Drink this, Miss Garillo, and please calm down…”

Just then, the door burst open. “Vance!” I shouted. He came near me and enveloped
me in a hug.

“Riks, what happened?” he asked, he was worried.

I shook my head, not wanting to relieve what happened. He looked at the doctor and
nurses and summoned them away. He said he’ll take care of me.

He caressed my hair; everything hurt. My head, my heart, my tummy… everything was

wrecked.

“You’ll be fine…” he whispered. He continued cooing me until I fell asleep.

--
Whispers were heard. Was I dreaming?

“What the hell Dane? I knew you were an ass but… fuck. You’re far, far worse!” he
seethed.

I badly wanted to open my eyes but I can’t. My lids felt so heavy. I stayed, my
eyes closed, listening to the two important guys in my life throwing banters at
each other.

Dane stayed quiet. Maybe he felt guilty… A pang of pain stabbed me. Was that all
I’ll ever have? Him taking me in because of pity and guilt? Was that all my worth?
“I… I didn’t know…” he answered.

Dane fell on the ground. I heard Vance punching him. I hate myself. I hate him but
I don’t want him hurting…

If only I could turn back time, I’d change everything. I can’t even recognize
myself anymore. Before, all I cared about was myself. I want everything ready
before me, I just want the best for myself. But since Dane, I disregarded what’s
best for me and considered what’s best for him. Everything was fucked up.

“Please let me talk to her…” he pleaded.

“No.” That was all that Vance said.

“Vance, Man, I need to talk to her!”

“Fuck you, a-hole. I left her whole, I found her broken! Now, don’t you dare tell
me you need to talk to Erika because, Dane, you will never. You hear me? Never.”

Then, I heard the door closing. I still can’t open my eyes…

I felt someone caressing my cheek… and then he kissed my forehead. “Everything will
be fine, Riks. Trust me, okay?”

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Chapter 32
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Epilogue will be posted in my fb page! Pls be guided accordingly and avoid throwing
fits like a baby, arasso? :D And pls do comment! x 

Play the song!! :D Art of letting go by Mikaila

Chapter 32

“I’m just gonna settle your bills, okay?”

I nodded in agreement. After a few days of staying in this hospital, I could

finally go back to my unit. Yes, I moved out from Dane’s house. I wasn’t really
invited, after all. He did ask me out of guilt. I’m tired of being looked down. I
want my old life back.

Dad and Angel went to visit me, as well. Even though I loathe them, I didn’t push
them away when they went to see me. Though I cannot exactly say that I was a
hospitable host, I let them be but I didn’t talk to them. Seeing me alive and
breathing was enough for them.

My Dad was aghast when he learned about what happened. Another of his kin died. Was
there a curse surrounding our family? I feel really damned…

He asked me to home but I declined. I know myself better, I need to be alone. I

need to find myself again.

“Erika…”

Oh, god. Not again.

“What do you want? I give up, okay… Just leave me alone,” I said to Allison.
Truth to that statement, I meant it. I give up. I’m so tired of everything. I had
to learn it the hard way but still, I learned. I can’t get everything I want. Fine.
Just please, please let me have my peace.

She didn’t understand what I said. She went near me and held my hand. “Erika, I’m
so sorry,” she said. “I’m pregnant, too, so I understand what you feel.”

Her pity made me sick. How can she utter those words, knowing that she’s the one
who made me this way?

“Just go away.”

She heaved a sigh and stifled a sob. Why was she acting this way? Was she the one
who got a miscarriage? She’s so… screwed!

“Erika, please hear me out, okay?” she said and breathed in once again. “Dane… Dane
said he’ll marry you. I’m pregnant, yes, and yes, he’s the father. But I’m not
pathetic. I won’t hold it against him. Sorry, but I’m not like that, Erika. I have
a mother and a brother who will accept me and take care of me. Yes, I love Dane.
God knows how much I do… But it’s not enough for me to beg. He’s gonna marry you…”
she said.

Even though I want to close my eyes and shut her out, I can’t help but to attend to
what she has to say.

“I went to tell you that I’m leaving for the States, Erika. Dane told me you were
having problems with me. He’s not numb. He can feel your doubts and it’s driving
him mad. We both are driving him crazy. But Erika, I freed him. He chose you.”

“Shut up!” I told her. I don’t want to hear any of this. I made up my mind; I will
hate Dane. But how will I do it if she’s here, telling me to forgive him, of all
people?

“When I told you I didn’t want to lie, I meant it. I went to tell you I’m pregnant
because I don’t want to hold this secret against Dane. I don’t want my baby to
haunt your life. I don’t want my baby to be the reason why you two will fight in
the future. I’m tired of being the secret; I’m tired of keeping secrets…”

She pursed her lips and nodded. “I’m sorry, Erika…” she said before leaving.

As she left, memories of my baby flashed through my mind. I can’t believe I lost
her because of fucked up situations! Why can’t Dane just be honest with me? Why
can’t… why did he have to lie? Lie after lie… it’s tiring…

I got rid of the IVs and changed. Vance’s still not here…

🎶Put away the pictures, put away the memories. I put over and over 
Through my tears I've held them till I'm blind. They kept my hope alive.🎶

I was supposed to ring the elevator but I decided to go for the stairs. I need much
time as I could have. Vance will never leave me alone, I know that so as much as
possible, I’ll have my alone time right now.

My phone rang when I was on the stairs going down. The caller ID said that it was
Dane.

Once and for all, for my peace of mind, I answered the call.
🎶Now here it comes, the hardest part of all. Unchain my heart that's holding on 
How do I start to live my life alone? Guess I'm just learning, learning the art of
letting go. 🎶
 
(“Erika…”) his voice was restless. (“Why won’t you talk to me? I’m gonna marry you,
remember? I know how a jerk I was but still, I gave you my word. I won’t back
out.”)

I kept mum. I can’t let him drag me back to that dark pit. I was just beginning to
get my life back together. I can’t let him ruin this for me… again.

(“The baby…”) then I heard him sobbing. Why was I like this? I know I should be
moved, but I can’t feel anything. I should be in awe; the guy whom I’ve been
chasing half my life was crying, begging even. (“Shit. Erika, I’m sorry I wasn’t
there…”) he consoled me.

I was walking down, listening to his every words, hanging to his every promises.
What’s the use, anyway? Will it give the life of Eriel back? It wouldn’t. It was
all empty words. It was too late. I was hurt. I felt like a damaged good. No one
could fix me.

🎶Try to say it's over Say the word goodbye. But each time it catches in my
throat you’re still here in me. And I can't set you free, so I hold on to what I
wanted most. Maybe someday we'll be friend's forever more. Wish I could open up
that door 🎶

“Do you love me?”

The waiting was killing me. Did he love me? That’s my deal breaker. Just… just
fucking love me, Dane. I’ll turn a blind eye and run back to you.

My breaths were heavy; I feel suffocated.

With trembling voice, he said, (“I like you.”)

“Wrong answer, Dane. I love you, Erika. How hard is that to say? I gave you
everything, offered you my everything! Heck, what is so wrong with me that you
can’t love me? Am I to detestable? Am I that loathsome? Answer me, dammit! What the
hell is wrong with me?” I shouted over the phone.

🎶Now here it comes, the hardest part of all. Unchain my heart that's holding on 
How do I start to live my life alone? Guess I'm just learning, learning the art of
letting go. 🎶
 
All I heard was his ragged breathing. It was this all over again. I’m begging… once
again. No matter what circle I run, he’s always the endgame.

“Stop me, Dane. Please stop me from dragging myself down. I was born out of
responsibility, I live in misery, please spare me from agony …” I pleaded.

🎶Watching us fade, what can I do? But try to make it through the pain of one more
day without you 🎶
 
“Erika…” he sighed my name.

He’s tired. He was always tired. Being with me exhausted him. Maybe it was really
meant to end like this. We’re toxic. We’ll bring down one another.
This was my last straw. I’m drawing. “Let’s—“ 

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Epilogue
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The epilogue is on my facebook page (Eydee's Stories) nasa NOTES!

Link: https://www.facebook.com/notes/eydees-stories/that-uptight-man-epilogue/
498549666909530
Nasa external link din siya! :)

Thanks for reading! No book2, please lang! Patahimikin niyo na sila!

:)

x, Eydee

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