Dillan DiGiovanni 

explains how honoring

your word differs from doing everything
you say you will.
 

I am a bit of a perfectionist. Like other guys, I pride myself on character traits like dependability,
responsibility and tenacity. I like being a guy you can count on. I am timely, thorough and
responsible.

I’ve always been like this, for the most part. I arrive 15 minutes early to appointments and
consider that “on time”. I always handed in papers and projects in on time in school and hardly
ever asked for extensions. I hit deadlines. I didn’t cut corners.

This way of being has served me well throughout my life, except when it led to me taking on too
much. When I did this and exceeded my own personal capacity, things started to drop. In my
efforts to be all things to all people, I ended up being being less to most. It took its toll on me and
affected my sleep, personality and performance.

◊♦◊

In short: it wasn’t working to be such an over-achiever. My manhood was coming into question.

Last year, I learned that being a man of my word didn’t always mean I did everything I signed up
to do. It didn’t mean I had to put myself through hell to make sure I completed every task or
commitment, was early or on time to every appointment and delivered on every promise. It
simply meant that I took on what I wanted to take on, and then honored if and/or why I wouldn’t
be able to deliver on it. Taking something on and getting in touch when or if I can’t do it is really
different from flaking out or bailing because I am overcommitted. It is really different from
shirking responsibility. It’s an opportunity to opt-in with the knowledge that I can opt-out if I
realize I can’t make it work. I am honoring THAT I said I’d do something, not merely honoring
the commitment itself, especially if it would throw me really out of balance to pull it off. And
this has totally revolutionized my personal and professional life.