PROFESSOR: Let's continue, let's continue, continue and answer.

Whatever.
PUPILAR: In French?
PROFESSOR: In French.
STUDENT: Uhh ... I should say in French: my grandmother's roses are?
PROFESSOR: As yellow as my grandfather, who was Asian...
STUDENT: Oh, I see, in French you'd say the roses. . of my ... how do you say in French?
"Grandmother" in
PROFESSOR: In French? Grandmother.
STUDENT: The roses at my grandmothers are yellow-7 in French, is it "yellow"?
PROFESSOR: Yes, of course!
STUDENT: Are you as yellow as my grandfather when he gets angry?
PROFESSOR: No...he was A.
STUDENT: I've a toothache.
PROFESSOR: That's it.
STUDENT: I've lost a tooth...
PROFESSOR: Toothache. . so what ... let's get on with it! And now translate the same sentence into
Spanish, then into New Spanish.
STUDENT: In Spanish. . that would mean: my grandmother's roses are as yellow as my grandfather's, who
was Asian.
PROFESSOR: No. That's wrong.
STUDENT: In Neo-Spanish: my grandmother's roses are as yellow as those of my Asian grandfather.
PROFESSOR: That's wrong. That's wrong, that's wrong. That's wrong. That's wrong. You've got it
backwards, you've got Spanish mixed up with Neo-Spanish and Neo-Spanish mixed up with Spanish...
Oh... no... it's the other way around.
STUDENT: I've a toothache. You're getting it all mixed up.
PROFESSOR: You're the one who's mixing me up. Pay attention and take notes. I'm going to tell you the
sentence in Spanish, then in Neo-Spanish, and finally in Latin. You'll repeat it back to me. Pay close
attention, because the similarities are striking. In fact, they're identical. Listen, follow carefully. . ..
STUDENT: I've a tooth.
PROFESSOR: ... ACHE.
STUDENT: Let's move on... Ah! ...
PROFESSOR: ... In Spanish: my grandmother's roses are as yellow as my grandfather, who was Asian; in
Latin: my grandmother's roses are as yellow as my grandfather, who was Asian. Do you recognize the
differences? Translate this into Romanian.
STUDENT: How do you say "roses" in Romanian?
PROFESSOR: But "roses," what else?
STUDENT: It's not "roses"? Oh, how my teeth hurt!
PROFESSOR: No, because " roses" is a translation of the French word "roses" into Oriental, "roses" into
Spanish "roses"," do you understand? In Sardanapalus, "roses"
Student: Excuse me, professor, but ... Oh, my toothache. I don't understand the difference.
PROFESSOR: But it's so simple! So simple! It's about having some experience, technical experience and
practice in these different languages. These languages are so different, even though they actually have
completely identical characteristics. I'll try to give you a key . . ..
STUDENT: Toothache.
PROFESSOR: The thing that distinguishes these languages is neither the words, which are absolutely the
same, nor the sentence structure, which is the same everywhere, nor the intonation, which has no
differences, nor the rhythm of speech ... the thing that distinguishes them ... are you listening?
STUDENT: I've a toothache.
PROFESSOR: Are you listening to me, young lady? Ah! We're going to lose our temper.
STUDENT: You're bothering me, Professor. I've a toothache.
Son of a cocker spaniel! Listen to me!
SCHUeLER: Oh. . . yes. . . yes . . . go on . . .
PROFESSOR: The thing that distinguishes them from each other, on the one hand, and from their mother,
Spanish with its silent e, on the other . . is
Student [grimaces]: Is that what?
PROFESSOR: It's an intangible thing. Something intangible that can only be grasped after very long study,
with a
STUDENT: Ah?
After long experience and great effort.
PROFESSOR: Yes, young lady. I can't give you a rule. You must have a feeling for it, and that is all. But to
have it, one must learn, learn, and learn some more.
STUDENT: Toothache.
PROFESSOR: Nevertheless, there are some cases where words differ from one language to another ... but
we base our knowledge on those cases, which are, seat.
STUDENT: Wow, professor, I've a toothache.
PROFESSOR: Don't interrupt me! Don't lose my temper!
I can't say what I'm going to do. I was going to say, then ... Oh yes, the exceptional cases, the so-called
easily distinguishable ... or easily distinguishable.
or easy ... if you like... I repeat, if you like, because I see that you aren't listening to me.
STUDENT: I've a toothache.
PROFESSOR: So I say: In certain expressions that are in use today, there are words that are completely
different from one language to another, so much so that the language used in this case is much easier to
identify. I'll give you an example: the New Spanish expression that is famous in Madrid, "My country is
the New Spain," is used in Italian:
STUDENT: The future of Spain.
PROFESSOR: No! "My country is Italy." Now tell me, by simple deduction, how do you say "Italy" in
French?
PUPIL: I've a toothache.
PROFESSOR: But it's very simple: for the word "Italy" in French there is the word "France," which is an
exact translation of it. My country is France. And "France" in Oriental:
"Orient!" My country is the Orient. And "Orient" in Portuguese: "Portugal!" The Oriental expression: my
country is the Orient is then translated into Portuguese in the same way: My country is Portugal! And so
on.
STUDENT: Oh, no more, no more. My teeth ...
PROFESSOR: Hurts! hurts! hurts! ... I am determined to pull them out, I will! Another example. The word
"capital" has a different meaning depending on the language you speak, that is, when a Spaniard says, "I
live in the "capitaleans, if incan at al de same thing that a Portuguese means o tee to say: I res la the
capital" All the more so in the case of a Frenchman, a neo-Spanish, a Romanian, a Latin, a Sardanapalus".
Whenever you hear it, young lady, young lady, I say it for you! Whew! Whenever you hear the
expression. As soon as you hear that someone "lives in the capital," you know immediately whether he is
a Spaniard, a Neo-Spanish, a Frenchman, an Oriental, a Romanian or a Latin, because it is enough to
know to which metropolis the person refers. pronounces the phrase. The moment he utters it ... But
these are almost the only precise examples I can give you ...
STUDENT: Oh dear! My teeth.
PROFESSOR: Shut up! Or I'll smash your skull in!
STUDENT: Try it! Skull-buster!
(The professor yanks her wrist and twists it)
STUDENT: Ouch!
PROFESSOR: Shut up now! Not a single word!
STUDENT [whimpers]: Toothache. . .
PROFESSOR: There is one thing that is very important . . how shall I say . . the most paradoxical thing.
Yes, that's the word ... the most paradoxical thing is that a lot of people who are totally illiterate speak
these different languages.
Do you understand that? What did I just say?
PUPIL: ... "Speak these different languages! What did I say?
Just said?"
PROFESSOR: Well, you are in luck! The common people use a Spanish full of neo-Spanish words they do
not even know, thinking they are speaking Latin ... or they speak Latin, full of Oriental words, thinking
they are speaking Romanian ... or Spanish, full of neo-Spanish words, thinking they are speaking
Sardanapali or Spanish.
Did you understand that?
Student: Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! What else do you want?
Professor: No impertinence, my dear, or you will be punished...
(angrily) But the worst of all, young lady, is that some people say, for example, in a Latin they think is
Spanish, "My two kidneys are from the same kidney," when addressing a Frenchman who does not know
a word of Spanish, but the latter understands it as if it were his own language. He thinks it is his own
language, by the way. And the Frenchman will answer in French, "Me too, my Lord, mine too," and this
will be perfectly understandable to a Spaniard, who will be sure that the answer is in pure Spanish and
that Spanish is spoken, although in reality it was neither Spanish nor French, but Latin in the neo-Spanish
dialect. . . Sit still, young lady, do not fidget, stop bobbing your feet ...
STUDENT: I have a toothache.
PROFESSOR: How do you explain the fact that the common people understand each other at all when
they speak without knowing what language they are speaking, or even when everyone thinks they speak
a different one?
STUDENT: I wonder about that.
PROFESSOR: That is simply one of the inexplicable curiosities of the vulgar empiricism of the common
people, not to be confused with experience! -a paradox, a nonsense, one of the aberrations of human
nature, it is simply instinct -- to put it in a nutshell. This is what it is all about
Here.
PUPIL: Hah! Hah!
PROFESSOR: Instead of staring at the flies while I go to all this trouble ... You'd do much better to pay
more attention ... i'm not the one who's going to qualify for the partial medical exam. I passed mine a
long time ago and have also earned my total doctorate. My super total diploma is attached. Don't you
realize that what I am saying is for your own good?
STUDENT: Toothache!
Rude... It can not go on like this, it can not go on like this, it can not go on like this
STUDENT: I am listening... To you.
PROFESSOR: Aha! To learn to distinguish all the different languages, as I told you, there's nothing better
than practice. Let us proceed in order. I will try to teach you all the translations of the word "knife"
STUDENT: All right ... if you want to.
PROFESSOR (calling the maid: Marie! Marie! She's not here... Marie! Marie! ... Marie, where are you? lie
opens the door on the right.