IT'S OKAY TO NOT BE OKAY

Superficial conversations - How are you? Fine! Good. Okay.

We try to answer honestly. But sometimes it feels easier to tell a simple lie. There are some moments,
some days, some seasons where when someone asks me how I’m doing I should say, I’m Not okay.

I may look fine, talk/act normal. But if I’m honest I’m not always okay. I’m struggling. You know what,
I’m not alone. I know that I’m not the only one who is NOT OKAY.

I want to start off by saying I hope my sermons don’t come across as a shallow call to try harder or pray
more. That’s not what I’m trying to say today. I deeply believe that it’s really dangerous for us to avoid
talking about this subject. I hope that if you are in the middle of a struggle with some of these issues, that
today will be the start of releasing your pressure valve.

As your youth minister let me tell you something. Many of our young people are hurting. There are many
students (not just here, but at school, in our community) who wrestle with anxiety, depression, and even
suicidal ideations. This is troubling! Students I’m here for you, this church is here for you.

Adults wrestle with the same problems teenagers do. The difference is as adults it seems to be harder for
us to confess our problems. We don’t want to admit it when we struggle. As human beings, we struggle
with our emotions. We struggle to remain/become healthy. In every aspect of the word.

Truth bomb: No one has it together, completely. Although there is a wide range of what each of us
struggle with. There’s a side of this battle that is emotional in nature.

So sometimes we are unhealthy mentally or emotionally. What do you think is the relationship between
mental health and spiritual health?

You can be spiritual healthy and struggling mentally.

You can be poor in both, you can be healthy in both.

You can be spiritually struggling and mentally healthy.

I do think it's possible that a spiritual struggle can lead to mental illness.

Not every mental illness has a spiritual component. Don’t hear me say/oversimplify - If you’re depressed
you’re a bad Christian.

If we’re going to talk about the spiritual side of emotional health, let’s go to God’s word. Just like our
lives are often raw, we’re gonna see some pretty raw emotions here. I want to show you a glimpse into
how common the darker, honest, raw range of human emotions are common in the Bible. So many in the
Bible: Saul, Jeremiah, Elijah, Moses, David, Jonah Judas, Jesus, Paul, Peter, John, etc. All show us
conflicted emotions!

Read
Psalm 25:16–18 ESV

Psalm 42:1–11 ESV

Psalm 143:7 ESV

Can you believe David, KING DAVID wrestled with emotions like this? This was a man after God’s own
heart!

David wasn’t perfect. Many of his laments and psalms of despair appear as a result of his own mistakes.
David is a good example of when spiritual illness can lead to emotional/mental illness.

Maybe David’s words catch your attention. A habit I’m developing is “praying the scripture” using a
portion of scripture, usually a psalm, and reading it as a source material for your prayers. You make the
Bible’s words your own. Recently, I’ve found praying David’s words to be especially helpful.

Next, let me show you what is perhaps the darkest psalm/song/prayer in the Bible. This is EXTREMELY
raw. I share this with you to show you that if you are in this struggle with your emotions/life, the Bible
speaks your language.

Note, I don’t think this Psalm has good theology. I don’t think his view of God is correct. However, it’s in
our Bible because it shows that we demonstrate FAITH in God even when we direct our rawest, most
honest prayers at God, trusting that he hears them.

Psalm 88 ESV

Psalm 34:18 ESV

Psalm 23 ESV

Powerful Psalm with both despair and hope. I want you to hear today that it is not a sin to STRUGGLE.
It’s not a sin to feel overwhelmed, abandoned, disappointed, depressed, exhausted, surrounded. It’s
OKAY to NOT be OKAY.

As you walk down this road searching for emotional/mental health have hope. As you walk alongside
those on that road, offer hope.

Don’t forget Jesus’ words. He came to teach, to die for us, but he also healed people everywhere he went.
His priority for healing was always on the spiritual, but time and time again he demonstrated he has the
power to heal any illness/ailment even death itself. Don’t forget his words, while he was speaking about
tax collectors and their spiritual health, he says

Have you ever heard the expression “Fake it till you make it”? It’s the Imposter Syndrome. But here is the
reality: we are not good enough on our own! This is why Jesus came.

Luke 5:31 ESV

31 And Jesus answered them, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick.
1. CONFESS TO GOD

Take it to God in confession. Be real and share your true emotion.

That initial moment of opening up was terrifying for me. And it might feel terrifying to you. But don’t let
your fear stop you. Confession is your first step to freedom.

Jesus sees you. Jesus hears you.

I want everyone in here to know that it is OKAY to NOT be OKAY. will you turn to the person next to
you and tell them “IT is OKAY to NOT be OKAY!”

When you are struggling with your emotional/mental health, take God with you. He loves you. He offers
healing, purpose, grace, mercy. I want you to see how much the Bible empathizes with your experience.
While the terms/diagnosis have changes, many of these issues are timeless.

When you are feeling lonely, isolated, desperate, hopeless. Please reach out to us.

We may not always know what to say, what to do, or how to help. But I know we love you, God loves
you, and we want to support each other here.

2. CONFESS TO OTHERS

It’s starts with you admitting when you’re not okay. The more we do that, the more the walls come down,
and we support/begin to heal one another.

We should breathe the oxygen of encouragement. Sometimes the greatest encouragement is to know that
someone else has walked your road — they know, feel, sympathise, empathise and understand. We must
be real, if we’re either to help or be helped. It is always tempting for us to isolate in fear. But we should
run to others, with the hope of being met with love.

For leaders: We need to allow ourself to be that someone who feel their own need of the Saviour, rather
than wanting to be a messiah themselves; not calling people to look to their leaders for the answers, but to
look with him to the Man of Calvary.

And we need churches that are workshops made up of imperfect people; places where love reigns;
communities of people helping one another on our pilgrim pathway to glory; linking arms and holding
hands, determined to see one another safe home. One of the most powerful things any of us can do to
help those who are hurting is to listen. Just slow down.

3. PROCESS IT
It’s okay to not be okay. But it’s not okay to stay there.

It is empathetically okay not to be okay, but when that okay hinders us from something that may better us,
it’s not okay. Jesus called you to more.