Northgate High School

Senior Project Mentor/Expert Critique

Dear Mentor/Expert,

Thank you for agreeing to critique this paper for __Erin Weber___ . With this form, the student should
provide the most recent draft of his/her Senior Project paper. Please read the paper for content, keeping
in mind it will be revised. The English teacher will critique the paper for requirements, appropriate style,
and mechanics. You are to read to ensure that the facts and research are accurate and sufficient.

Please make comments on the margins of the draft, answer the questions on this sheet, and feel free to
add any additional comments on the back. This paper is a requirement for the student’s graduation, so
your help is appreciated.

1. Is there any misinformation or has the writer made any factual errors? yes _____ no __x___
Comments:

The information and data Erin supplied is accurate with sources.

2. Can you suggest sources for additional research for this topic, such as materials to read or watch
and persons to interview?

Suggested interview with John Calambodkis. Additionally sources through NOAA’s website, which is a
wealth of information on this topic.

3. What information can you give to help the student improve the content of the paper (including
your own knowledge of the topic)?

Adding more facts/data is always good. Also following a story and making sure not to be too repetitive
in your writing. Think of the problem from all angles and what your thesis is.

4. I have read this paper and discussed my comments with the student. yes __x___ no _____

Mentor’s name and qualifications: Daria Sheik, Management Coordinator, California Ocean Alliance
Mentor’s signature: Daria Sheik
Phone number: 858-353-2025
Mentor’s Email Address: dariasheik@caoceanalliance.org
Additional comments: Erin and I have gone over her paper in detail within googledocs.