I think we are all just like the ocean. We are all just plain blue on the out side.

When the sun is out we shine greatly and we are happy and then when a storm
comes we express a different side where we all have different emotional waves that
come crashing down that we don't really expect. And we have a unique, beautiful
inside with different stories and emotional levels that we let people into. But as you
go farther down beneath just the surface we have different zones that we let
different people into based on how much trust is there and then you get to the
deeper, darker, sadder part where most don't know about. And we have our
Mariana Trench where no one can go down because it's just too far out of reach
and we don't let anyone in because we think we might get judged if we let someone
that far in where all the truth really hides. You know the real you is down there but
you are just too tired of all the problems you might have had when you just let
someone in that deep dark sacred place.

I still hold onto a small, childish hope that there's someone out there in this crazy,
wild world so completely, utterly meant for me even the stars will sigh, at last in
relief at our meeting. And if you're going to fall in love with me, here are some of
the things you should know beforehand I cry often. Whether it's during a movie, a
sad song on the radio, or a regular Sunday morning. I'll cry even when speak of
things that have hurt me, even if they no longer hurt anymore. I am afraid of being
left and I'm afraid of not being good enough. You can tell me you love me
countless times, but I will still be afraid of you leaving me. Don't blame yourself. I
have to expect the worst because always get the worse.

And if I'm going to fall in love with you, I will love each crack in your skin and
every freckie of light in your eyes. I will fall in love woth the way your mouth
curves when you say my name. I will never gove up on you and I will love you
with my entire heart and if one day you decide to leave, I will still think highly of
you. I will still remember the kind hearted person you are.

Here's the thing.

No one asks to be insecure, to have anxiety, to be depressed and I can sure in the
hell guarantee you no one enjoys it either. Sometimes people experience and get
put through things that they should never get put through because so many people
in this world take advantage of people that feel a little too much and give too many
chances and it leaves them broken and cold. And when those breaks don't get put
back right and it's all left messy then you're not just right either. It's a long road to
try and put yourself back together again to glue the pieces back together but if
someone can't acknowledge that you are trying or uses your weaknesses against
you to justify themselves then know that it's okay to get tired and walk away.And if
I'm going to fall in love with you, I will love each crack in your skin and every
freckie of light in your eyes. I will fall in love woth the way your mouth curves
when you say my name. I will never gove up on you and I will love you with my
entire heart and if one day you decide to leave, I will still think highly of you. I
will still remember the kind hearted person you are.