Lesson 5

Supporting Families of Children with

Special Needs
Dr. Merriam Silin
Families of Young Children with Special
Needs
Preschoolers with special needs are members of our
communities, programs, and families and it is our
responsibility to provide high-quality, inclusive support
for these children and their families. While these families
often experience additional situations and stressors, they
have hopes, dreams, and concerns for their children just
like other families. You can positively impact families with
a preschooler with special needs by empowering them
with knowledge, empathizing with their feelings, and
collaborating with other support professionals in their
lives.
Working with Families of Children with
Special Needs
Families with preschoolers with special needs may go
through various evaluation processes and may ask you to
complete questionnaires or provide input at the request
of a doctor, specialist, or teacher. Other professionals rely
on this input, especially when they have limited amounts
of time with children compared to program staff who
often spend many hours each week caring for, educating,
and observing children. This information can be used to
determine if a child has a specific condition, support the
child outcomes summary process, determine eligibility
for specific services, and develop goals for an
individualized education program (IEP).
You, or a trainer or administrator from your program,
may be asked to participate in an IEP review, a time when
the team of professionals and families come together to
assess progress, create new outcomes, and determine
needed services. Preschool children with IEPs may attend
your program and their local education agency (LEA).
Services on an IEP may only be provided at the LEA, or
interventionists and related services personnel may
“push in” and provide services within your program.
Regardless of how special education services are
delivered, working with professionals from outside
agencies helps things run smoothly for families and
ensures that all of the professionals and caregivers in a
child’s life are communicating. This lessens family stress
by reducing the need for primary caregivers to act as the
in-between messenger of important information.
Effective Practices
The first step to establish strong relationships with
families of children with special needs is to spend time
discovering their wishes and concerns for their children
and to learn about the meaningful activities they
participate in at home. Maintaining this communication
throughout a child’s time in your program is essential.
Ask questions to learn about strategies that work at
home and consider using them in your classroom.
Through your interactions you can build trust so both you
and families feel comfortable sharing children’s strengths
and if there are concerns (Sandall, Hemmeter, Smith, &
MCLean, 2005).
Before communicating concerns with families, it may be
helpful to discuss with a coach, trainer, or administrator your
plan to share this information using family-centered practice.
Be prepared for families to react in a variety of ways, and know
how you can offer support if they choose to take specific steps
or access other agencies and resources. For families already
receiving support from other professionals, ongoing
communication with both families and professionals is critical
to maintain consistency between program and home
environments. When all the caregivers and professionals in a
child’s life are consistently using effective strategies to
promote development and outcomes, children are more likely
to benefit and learn new skills.
In your collaboration with families, acknowledge and
respect their strengths and unique background, while
realizing their ability to make decisions that are right for
them (Hanson & Lynch, 2004). This means that when
family wishes and decisions are different from what you
would recommend, you will respond to the family’s
decisions with respect. Ultimately, meaningful
communication and relationship-building will enrich the
process for both yourself and families.
Think about which of these you can use in your work with
families of children with special needs (Turnbull,
Turbiville, & Turnbull, 2000):
• Recognizing the family as a constant in the child’s
life; caregivers and service systems may come and
go
• Facilitating collaboration between families and
professionals
• Honoring and respecting family diversity in all
dimensions (cultural, racial, ethnic, linguistic,
spiritual, and socioeconomic)
• Recognizing family strengths and the different
approaches that families may use to cope
• Sharing unbiased and honest information with family
members on an ongoing basis
• Encouraging family-to-family support and networking
• Acknowledging and incorporating the developmental needs
of the child and other family members into your practice
• Designing and implementing services that are accessible,
culturally and linguistically respectful and responsive, flexible,
and based on family-identified needs
There are many ways you can demonstrate
respect and consideration for families of
children with special needs in your
classroom. Consider the following:
• Acknowledge that families know their child best and ask
them questions about services or resources that may be
helpful to you.
• Establish ongoing communication between home and school.
Communication journals are a great way to maintain
communication. These are usually sent home with the child
and returned the next day. Teachers can share noteworthy
observations or events, and families can respond to those or
share their own news or reflections. While communication
journals can be used with families of all children in your
classroom, they can be an especially valuable tool in
establishing consistency between home and school
environments for children with special needs.
• Incorporate children’s books in your classroom library that
reflect consideration of multiple abilities and differences.
• Invite families to talk about their children with special needs.
For example, a family member may come in your classroom
and talk about their child’s use of adaptive equipment (e.g.,
braces, wheelchair, or a communication device). The family
member may explain the use of equipment, which can help
children and other families understand aspects of their life.
This also promotes acceptance of differences.
• Be a team player! Work collaboratively with families and
other professionals who may be involved in the delivery of
services to children with special needs.
If disagreements or miscommunication arise, consider
the following:

• Remind yourself that your role is to support families’

hopes and dreams for their child.
• Be patient. Dealing with a child with special needs may
be challenging at times, and family members need time
to navigate this experience at their own pace.
• Avoid making judgments for families and their children.
• Consider difficult times as opportunities to
build trust between yourself and families.
• Question your assumptions about working
with families of children with special needs and
urge other professionals you know to do the
same.
• Talk with your trainer, supervisor, or coach
when in doubt about any aspect of your work
with families.
12 Ways to Support Families of
Students with Disabilities
Conduct a reflection exercise. Reflect on the
last educational planning meeting you
attended as a teacher. What do you think
went right in the meeting? What specific
things could have improved it? Write down
your responses and use them as a guide to
improve your next meeting.
Interview a family. Conduct an interview
with a family of a child with a disability. How
do the family members feel about the
educational process for their child? Do they
see their relationship with the teacher as a
true partnership? Why or why not? Use the
insights you uncover to strengthen your
work.
Learn more about the effects of poverty.
Socioeconomic status can affect the performance of
students with disabilities and the educational
participation of their families. Do some internet
research on the various ways poverty may affect the
families in your community. Find data on the
prevalence of poverty in your community and
demographics about who is affected. Have the
prevalence and/or demographics changed in the
past 10 years? If so, how?
Make IEP meetings a positive experience. Are your
IEP meetings as comfortable and welcoming to
families as they could be? Here are some things to
do:

- Provide a summary or an agenda ahead of time

- Create an IEP draft that includes goals that the
family values
- Meet in a setting that’s comfortable for the family
and greet them warmly on arrival
- Arrange seating so that all parties have equal
status
- Provide an interpreter, if necessary, who is
familiar with the family’s culture, language, and
any jargon that may be used in the meeting
- Hand out helpful supplementary materials–a
chart to summarize the discussion, a “cheat
sheet” of terms
- Follow up afterward to see if the family has
additional thoughts or questions
Communicate regularly. Families often express
frustration when they’re not kept in the loop about
their child’s progress. Be sure to communicate often
with families, and ask them which mode they
prefer—telephone calls, letters, email, or occasional
face-to-face meetings. If one mode isn’t working
well, give another one a try. And when you
communicate, challenge yourself to listen as much
as you speak, so that families know you respect their
views and knowledge about their child.
Make it easy for family members to get
involved. Share information with families on
how to become involved in school activities
and take on leadership roles. Point them to
resources on how to join and participate in
the PTA, volunteer activities, and family
councils.
Offer families evidence-based practices (EBPs).
Tell families how important and beneficial it is to
use EBPs with their children, and ask family
members if they’d like you to share these
practices with them. Explain that consistently
using the same strategies at home and school
can help their children learn faster and apply
their new skills in environments where they are
needed. (Be careful not to pressure families to
use EBPs.)
Help families find high-quality resources. Some
of the resources that families find on their own
may not reflect best practices. Make a list of
legitimate websites and other trusted resources
that present EBPs, so you can easily share
reliable information with families. Directing
them to online learning modules, for example,
can save families the cost, time, and travel
associated with face-to-face training.
Point families to support groups. Use the
internet to find professional organizations (e.g.,
The Arc, Autism Society, Down Syndrome Soci-
ety, TASH) that offer support groups for families.
Are support groups affiliated with these
organizations offered in your community? Is
support offered online (e.g., through discussion
groups)? Create a list of valid support group
networks to share with families and help them
benefit from these valuable connections.
Think beyond parents. Remember that many
families consist of more than the child’s
parents. When you’re developing family
partnerships, make an effort to include sib-
lings, extended family members, and other
caregivers who wish to be involved.
Respect each family’s culture. There are
complex issues at play in the lives of each of
your students. Recognize that each family is
unique, even within a specific culture. Instead of
making generalizations and assumptions, use
data on each individual family to guide you in
your work. Respect the position of families who
cannot or choose not to be involved in their
child’s school.
Set an example. Lead by example in your
school—model positive ways of speaking
with and interacting with families, so that
other teachers and staff members will follow
suit.