Meat consumption

FINAL GRADE : 90
In the history of humankind, we had never consumed meat in these immense quantities.
Meat has many important vitamins and nutrients that we need for repairing our bodies but
because we eat meat so much it causes this big environmental impact that becomes a
problem for everyone, daily we make about 60 tons of garbage, equal to 15 big trucks filled
with pollutants, that is a lot!
As I mentioned in the past (avoid such parasite expressions): Consuming meat is a
significant part of our daily plate it has essential vitamins and nutrients vital for our bodies,
however with all the benefits, it possesses it causes harm too. Let's recognize why! – I could
not figure out where your Topic Sentence was. 

(This is your ACTUAL paragraph, one that corresponds to the structure of an

academic Paragraph, however it lacks a Topic Sentence ): It is scientifically proven (proven by
who?) that meat is cancerogenic meaning it causes various types of cancer; it has become
dangerous to consume meat because the vast majority of times we do not get any information
on what conditions where and when the animal was raised, the meat can contain
contamination with various diseases because the animal is not always properly vaccinated.
The other side of meat consumption as I mentioned above was the effects on the
environment, such as the effects on water consumption. Enormous amounts of water are
demanded the animals to grow and even more to water the plants they feed upon, as we
consume more we need more animals, therefore, more space and that causes deforestation.
(Concluding Sentence should be one single sentence, that summarizes the whole idea of the
paragraph): I am not a vegetarian nor I am advocating the vegetarian lifestyle; I identify the
problem and I understand that So, we need to solve it this problem because we can afford not
to eating meat but we cannot afford to losing the planet we call home.

PLEASE NOTE:
1) Whenever you include any statistics or facts, make sure you cite the sources.
2) You have no Topic Sentence: Cancer and water consumption are the key ideas/points in
the paragraph, so it would be correct if you had a Topic Sentence that includes these two
ideas after which you could present each point as Generalization 1 and Generalization 2
separately with their Details.
3) On Nov 13 you will have an opportunity to correct your paragraph, thus also your grade,
during our lesson. Make sure you have this paragraph at hand.
Narek Davtyan: Writing skills, 1st module