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Always seek the guidance of a health care professional if you have any questions or concerns or require more information than is included in
this publication.
Section 3, Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health, details Not sure what a word or concept means?
everything from sleep to using the toilet, with a focus on keeping your Check the What is…? boxes that appear throughout the book.
toddler safe and healthy.
Section 4, Parenting Your Toddler, helps you navigate the ins-and- Interested in information on healthy eating?
outs of discipline, challenging behaviours and, of course, staying calm See the recently revised Canada’s food guide on page 112.
through it all.
Section 5, Toddler Safety, offers important information and helpful Want to speak with a health care professional in person?
tips on keeping your child safe at home, at play, in the car and in
Phone HealthLink BC, an invaluable free service of the Government of
the community.
British Columbia. Call 8-1-1 toll-free, or 7-1-1 for the deaf and hard of
hearing. Services are available in 130 languages, 24 hours a day. Speak with
You might notice throughout the book that we sometimes refer to
a registered nurse (anytime), a pharmacist (nightly, from 5 pm to 9 am),
your toddler as she, other times as he. In almost every case, the same
or a registered dietitian or qualified exercise professional (9 am to 5 pm,
information applies to all toddlers, regardless of sex.
Monday to Friday).
Our What is…? boxes explain key words and Our Money Sense boxes share tips
ideas in easy-to-understand terms. on how to save money on everything
from child care to vision care.
Our Family Story boxes give you Our Medical Emergency boxes help
a peek into the experiences of you recognize whether a situation
other parents. calls for immediate medical help.
Our How To boxes help you master Our Seek Care boxes point out
the practical tasks of parenting by things that warrant a call to your
breaking them down into easy-to-follow steps. health care provider or HealthLink BC.
Temperament includes:
• her general mood
• how active she is
• how she reacts to new situations
• whether she’s easily distracted or can focus well
FAMILY STORY
A nurse suggested I get down on
the floor with my son and watch what he
was doing while trying to imagine what
he was thinking. I learned a lot about him
from this simple act of quiet watching.
Brain Development
How Can You Build Your Serve and return interactions help build a
KEY TAKEAWAY solid foundation for your toddler’s brain – and
Toddler’s Brain? support all future development. Serve and
The experiences your child has as a
toddler will affect his health, well-being and You can help build your toddler’s brain through return interactions also build attachment (see
coping skills for the rest of his life. what experts call “serve and return” interactions. Attachment) between you and your toddler.
KEY TAKEAWAY
Early experiences play a big role
in shaping your toddler’s brain. And while
every child develops at their own pace, a
healthy brain supports development in
all areas.
HOW TO HOW TO
Support your toddler’s emotional HOW TO Support your toddler’s language
development Support your toddler’s cognitive development
✔ Help him learn to recognize and name development
✔ Talk to him.
his emotions. ✔ Set up safe and interesting play
✔ Listen to him.
✔ Help him learn to show his feelings in a opportunities.
✔ Read to him. (See Reading to Your Toddler)
healthy way. ✔ Play with him.
✔ Tell him stories.
✔ Comfort him. ✔ Praise him.
✔ Sing with him.
✔ Talk to him.
BRAIN BUILDER
Talk to your child all the time. By
asking him questions, chatting about what
you’re doing, and sharing rhymes, songs
and stories, you’ll stimulate his brain and
help him learn to speak and read.
If you’re concerned, see If You Have Concerns About Your Toddler’s Development and talk with your health care provider.
Physical Development
• sits steadily without help • stands by pushing off from a squat • walks on her own
• stands firmly when held • walks while holding onto furniture or • crawls or walks up stairs, putting both
• bounces and shuffles around on her bottom your hands feet on one step while holding onto a
• crawls well, including up stairs railing or your hand
• rakes at tiny objects with her hands; picks up
larger objects with her fingers • feeds herself small pieces of food • climbs on things (like chairs) and out
of things (like strollers)
• grabs, shakes and bangs things together • uses the tip of her index finger and
thumb to pick up small things • drinks from a cup
• chews or gums finely minced foods
• puts one block on top of another • turns the pages of a book
• stacks 3 or more blocks
TRY THIS • scribbles with a big crayon
Make lots of time for crawling and TRY THIS
tummy time. Give her something to hold Hold her hand or stand behind
and shake. And get down on the floor and her as she climbs stairs. Show her how to TRY THIS
roll a ball to her. stack blocks. Let her use activity tables or Give her balls to play with. Play
other toys where she can press buttons music and dance together. Let her stack
and make noises. And offer her foods with and nest plastic bowls and match lids to
different textures. pots. Offer her big crayons and paper. And
help her solve simple, large-piece puzzles.
• kicks a ball • walks backwards and sideways • walks a few steps on a narrow beam
• squats while playing • walks up and down stairs alone, putting • climbs a slide’s ladder
• backs into a chair to sit down both feet on one step • pedals a tricycle
• rides a small-wheeled toy • jumps in place, lifting both feet off the floor • copies circles, dots, lines and swirls
• takes off her own shoes, hat and socks • moves on a riding toy using both feet at • cuts paper with small safety scissors
the same time
• lifts a cup and drinks, then puts it down • turns handles and doorknobs
• holds a crayon in her whole hand and
scribbles
TRY THIS TRY THIS
Offer her shape-sorting activities Play tag and follow the leader.
TRY THIS
and finger paints. Play with plastic Roll down hills together. Pretend you’re
containers in the bath. Run and kick balls Play movement games where you animals. Let her turn the pages while you
together. Let her try a ride-on toy. And stop and go, change directions and move read to her. And offer her dress-up clothes
encourage her to dress and undress on fast and slow. Let her dress herself, helping with snaps, buttons and zippers.
her own. with buttons and zippers only when
needed. Give her markers, crayons and
puzzles to play with. And let her help with
simple kitchen tasks. DID YOU KNOW
BRAIN BUILDER Between ages 2 and 3, some
Tell her what she’s doing as she’s toddlers will learn to walk up and down
doing it (“You’re climbing the stairs!” “You’re stairs, one foot after the other, while
drawing with a crayon!”) holding the handrail.
• plays social games like peekaboo • knows when you like or dislike his behaviour • likes to be the centre of attention
and patty cake • holds out his arms and legs while • starts to show a sense of humour
• wants to do things with others being dressed • plays best by himself and doesn’t share toys
• points to things for a reason • copies simple actions and other children • copies adult activities, like reading and talking
• tries to get attention • repeats sounds or movements that make on the phone
• watches others you laugh • separates himself from you for brief periods
• notices when people enter a room • takes turns with you in simple games • calls for you
• notices what others are looking at
• follows where you point, then looks back
TRY THIS to you TRY THIS
Play seeking games (“Where’s Make up a goodbye routine (a big
Michael?”) to teach your toddler he’s not kiss, a wave and some special words, for
part of you. Invite others to join you as you TRY THIS
example). Offer him choices, like whether
play, or take part in a playgroup. Let him Talk to your toddler about what to put on his coat or his shoes first. And let
approach new people at his own pace. activities will happen next in the day. him help with simple chores.
KEY TAKEAWAY
Encourage your toddler’s social development at every stage by:
✔ responding when he wants help ✔ using “please” and “thank you” to model
or attention good manners
✔ keeping to routines ✔ letting him be around people and play
✔ eating together at the family table with other children
• likes playing alone for short periods • has trouble sharing • hugs, kisses and shows affection
• is better at playing beside, rather • knows the difference between boys and girls • uses social language like “thank you” and
than with, other children • likes to do more for himself “bye-bye”
• says “no” and “mine” often and has • likes being near other children in parallel play • plays with others and takes turns more easily
trouble sharing • plays make-believe games and creates
• likes to do things without help imaginary characters
TRY THIS
Give him chances to play one-on-
TRY THIS one with another child. Let him do some
TRY THIS
Let him know what to expect in things without help. Use his toys to model Give your toddler lots of affection
new situations. Talk to him about family and sharing (“Look! Dolly’s sharing her blocks and encouragement. Join him in imaginary
friends. Point out what other children are with Teddy.”) Spend quiet time together play. Introduce him to neighbours and
doing, and introduce him to a playmate. reading, telling stories and cuddling. let him play with other children, but
And give him lots of praise for positive stay nearby to supervise and help him
behaviour. solve problems.
What is parallel play?
Playing beside or near other children.
• shows strong likes and dislikes • shows many emotions • likes familiar places
• laughs • is upset when she does something wrong • takes risks if a trusted adult is present
• wants to stay with you or other • wants comfort when she’s upset • recognizes herself in mirrors and photos
trusted adults • needs to be within sight and hearing of a • hugs and kisses you and other very
• shows when she’s scared caregiver familiar people
• shows affection with hugs, kisses, pats • likes being the centre of attention
and smiles
TRY THIS
Smile at your toddler, make TRY THIS
lots of eye contact and practise other TRY THIS Let her play on her own. Talk about
serve and return interactions (see Brain Offer her simple choices, like any upcoming changes to her routine. And
Development). which cup to use. And ask her for lots of find ways to help her feel successful.
hugs and kisses.
• shows concern for others • wants to get her own way • gets upset by big changes to routines
• shows fear, but can be settled down • likes routines • responds to other people’s feelings
• sometimes wants to do things on her • acts out emotions through play – • is more comfortable with new people
own, sometimes wants help roaring like an angry lion, for example • wants to do things for herself, but
• is watchful around new adults • has strong feelings but trouble may fear new things
expressing them • wants approval and needs praise
TRY THIS
Talk to her about how others feel TRY THIS TRY THIS
and how her actions affect them (“I think Encourage her to show and talk Sing songs and read stories about
John feels sad because you took away his about her emotions. Make transitions emotions. Talk about how the characters
toy.”) And offer her choices to help her cope easier by letting her know what to expect are feeling and why.
with her own feelings (“You’re feeling sad. (“In 5 minutes it will be time to pick up your
Do you want to cuddle or be alone?”). sister from school”).
• notices the size of objects • connects animals with the sounds they make • realizes things still exist even when he
• knows if things are near or far • has a better memory can’t see them
• searches briefly for an object that’s been • sees you as separate from himself, and points • finds things in pictures
taken away when asked, “Who’s Mommy?” • learns by touching and moving things –
• understands how things can be used – shakes • recognizes his own name fitting things into holes, for example
a noisemaker or pushes a button, for example • starts to understand cause and effect, like • expects events to follow routines
that things fall when dropped • follows simple directions, like “show me
• matches shapes, like putting a cube in a the ball”
TRY THIS
square hole
Play copying games, like clapping
or sticking your tongue out at each other. TRY THIS
Hide things from him briefly, then reveal TRY THIS Count things together. Talk about
them. And play in-and-out games, like events and people he remembers. Ask him
Take turns doing things, like
putting blocks in a container and taking to point to pictures in books. And give him
blowing kisses. Ask him to help you find
them out again. simple directions (“Put your truck and doll
lost objects. And talk about cause and
effect (“You dropped Teddy, so now he’s on in the toy box, please”).
the floor”).
BRAIN BUILDER
FAMILY STORY It’s healthy for your toddler to feel
Whenever my friend, a teacher, a little bit of frustration when he’s trying to
would come over, she would pull things do something. By not rushing in to help,
from her pockets to show our 10-month- you’re teaching him problem-solving skills.
old and say the names of them carefully. He
would often try to copy her. It was a good
example of what I needed to be doing
every day.
• uses things the way they’re meant to be • pretend-plays with others • compares sizes of things and uses words
used, like putting a phone to his ear • matches and sorts some shapes and colours like “bigger” and “smaller”
• understands the passing of time and the • starts to understand the order of numbers • play-acts, like pretending to be a dinosaur
meaning of words like “not now” • counts 3 things
• has a longer attention span
• names familiar people in photos • matches and sorts things
• starts solving problems by trial and error
• has a better memory • enjoys creative movement
TRY THIS
TRY THIS TRY THIS
Let him fill in the blanks when
Give him crayons, markers and you’re singing or reading together. And Talk to him about number order
paper to scribble with and 2- to 4-piece play matching and sorting games. (“Who’s first?”), encourage him to tell
puzzles to try. Talk about time (“We’re stories, and ask him what he thinks about
going to Grandma’s tomorrow”) and about things. Let him try 3- to 6-piece puzzles.
sounds you hear, like car horns or barking And give him clothes and props to play
dogs. And challenge his skills by, for dress-up.
example, giving him a fourth block once
he can stack 3.
KEY TAKEAWAY
Encourage your toddler’s cognitive development at every stage by:
✔ offering him a variety of toys, puzzles and ✔ giving him plenty of praise as he learns
art supplies new skills
✔ reading with him and talking about the
pictures (see Reading to Your Toddler)
✔ dancing and singing together See the Brain Builder boxes
throughout this guide for ideas
✔ counting together
on boosting your toddler’s cognitive
✔ talking about the shapes and colours development.
of things
• says several sounds (“ma mu da di ba”) • babbles in longer strings of sounds like • says 5 or more words
in one breath “bababa” or “badagee” • understands many more words than she can
• babbles and repeats sounds (“da da da”) • responds to simple instructions that include say – points, for example, when asked where
• responds to some words, like “Mommy” familiar words her belly button is
or “ball” • takes turns making sounds with you • uses “no” correctly, often with a shake of
• turns to listen to familiar sounds, like a • copies speech sounds her head
ringing phone • tries to sing songs
• looks when you say her name • makes animal sounds and other sound effects
TRY THIS
• shakes her head to say “no” • uses gestures like clapping her hands,
Read to your toddler every day blowing a kiss or giving a “high 5”
(see Reading to Your Toddler).
• puts her finger to her lips to say “shhh”
TRY THIS
Use simple sentences to talk
about what you’re doing (“We’re looking at TRY THIS TRY THIS
the dog”). If you speak more than one Read to your toddler using
language, use both from the start. One different voices and lots of expression.
parent or caregiver can use one language Sing to her. Give her books to look at and
TRY THIS while the other uses another. Read to your encourage her to point out things in pictures.
child in both languages, too. And keep a diary of the words she says.
It’s never too soon to start sharing
books with your toddler. She may like
flipping the pages, talking about what
she sees or just looking at the words and DID YOU KNOW DID YOU KNOW
pictures (see Reading to Your Toddler). You don’t need to try to teach
Many toddlers leave out words like
your toddler to read and write. By reading,
“the” and “in” and endings like “-ing” and “-s”
talking and singing to her, you’ll build the
when they’re learning to speak English.
language skills that form the basis of her
later literacy.
• uses 2- or 3-word sentences • uses personal pronouns like “I,” “me,” and “you” • can often be understood
• understands about 200 words • says her name, based on what she hears • asks lots of questions
• says (clearly or not) about 50 words herself being called • tells stories and sings
• talks to herself or her stuffed animals • answers simple questions like “What’s • may repeat 5-word sentences
your name?”
• names pictures in books • uses social words like “please,”
• likes looking at books and talking about “thank you” and “hello”
• copies new words and phrases
the pictures
• asks “what” and “where” questions • names most body parts
• sings parts of songs
• asks lots of questions
TRY THIS TRY THIS
Listen to her carefully and ask Ask about things she’s interested
simple questions about what she’s saying. TRY THIS in. Use open-ended questions like “What
And take her to the library. Repeat what she says to show did you see on your walk?” or “What do you
her you’re interested. And look at family think?” Sing number songs, too, and make
pictures together, describing them in up silly rhymes together.
simple sentences.
FAMILY STORY
I talked to my daughter about
anything and everything we were doing.
When crossing the street, for example, I’d
say, “Is it safe to cross? Let’s look for cars. KEY TAKEAWAY
There are no cars. It’s safe. Let’s go.” All that Encourage your toddler’s language development at every stage by:
talking really helped her learn words, and ✔ talking to her about everything from what ✔ reading to her every day
I wasn’t surprised when she spoke at an you’re doing (“Let’s wash these cups”) to ✔ building on what she says (If she says “ball,”
early age. what she sees (“What a fluffy cat!”) you can say, “Yes, that’s a red ball.”)
✔ responding to her babbling with your ✔ using nursery rhymes to help her learn
own words, as though you’re having a language patterns
conversation
✔ singing while doing daily tasks, like
✔ pointing out the names of things changing her diaper
around you
Sexual Development
Sexual Development by Age Masturbating and Exploring
KEY TAKEAWAY
The way you touch, care for and
From birth to 24 months, your toddler may: With Other Children
talk about your toddler’s body sends • enjoy being naked
important messages. • like to touch parts of their body, including DID YOU KNOW
genitals It’s as normal for your toddler to
Think about your own values and beliefs and • get erections or vaginal lubrication as a touch their genitals as it is to explore their
what you want to communicate to your child natural reflex toes or fingers.
about sexuality. Consider: From 24 to 36 months, your toddler may:
✔ using medical or scientific terms for all body • touch their genitals or masturbate Toddlers are naturally curious about their bodies.
parts, from nose to vagina And once they begin to explore, they quickly
• notice differences between boys and girls
✔ remembering that curiosity about the body learn that touching their genitals feels good.
• explore bodies (“play doctor”) with a same-
is normal If your toddler is touching themself in public,
age playmate
✔ thinking ahead about how you’ll answer your remind them that genitals are personal areas,
• be interested in body functions
toddler’s questions, so you’re less anxious best explored in private spaces like their own
when they come up bedroom. Offer a toy or other distraction.
✔ talking about the difference between what’s DANGER If they’re exploring genitals with another
okay in public and what’s meant for private Although there can be many child of similar age, calmly tell them their
reasons for changes in your child’s genitals are private and shouldn’t be touched
behaviour, some changes may signal or looked at by other people unless they have
TRY THIS abuse. Talk with your health care provider given them permission. Re-direct them to
Let your child decide who he if your child: another activity, and ask them if they have
wants to hug and kiss. This teaches him • develops a strong, constant focus on their questions.
that he has control over his body. own and others’ genitals If they’re exploring genitals with an older
• doesn’t follow your rules around child, calmly talk with your child about what
respecting and not touching others’ happened. Tell your child they haven’t done
private areas anything wrong but remind them that no one
• has discharge, swelling or bruising in the should touch or look at your child’s genitals
genital area without their permission. Talk with your health
care provider if you have concerns.
Gender Identity
Children usually begin to show interest in their
gender early in life. At 2 to 3 years old, they
What is assigned sex? What is Two-Spirit?
see the differences between male and female The sex assigned to a baby at birth. When A term used by many Indigenous people
bodies. Most children will call themselves either a newborn has a penis, the assigned sex is who have diverse genders and sexualities.
a “boy” or a “girl.” This may or may not match “male.” When a newborn has a vulva, the Two-Spirit people were historically revered
the sex they were assigned at birth, and it may assigned sex is “female.” In rare cases, a child in most nations, and may have different
change over time. is born with external sex organs that are not roles, gifts, language and appearances
clearly male or female. depending on the nation they’re from. Two-
Spirit identity is very closely connected to
KEY TAKEAWAY Indigenous culture and spirituality, and this
Most children will identify with the What is gender identity? term can’t be personally used by someone
sex they were assigned at birth. Others may Who a person knows themself to be. A child who is non-Indigenous.
realize that their gender identity doesn’t may identify as a boy or girl – or they may
match their assigned sex. Some children not identify as either.
may switch between calling themselves a HOW TO
“boy” and a “girl,” or avoid being labelled at Support healthy gender
all. All children may express their identity in development in your child
What is gender expression?
creative ways.
How a person expresses themself to others. ✔ Love your child and be proud of them
This exploration of gender identity This can include how they act, what they for who they are. Don’t pressure them
is a normal and healthy part of every wear, how they do their hair, and the name to change.
child’s development. And all children do they choose to go by. Gender expression is ✔ Talk with your child about gender and
best when they know they’re loved and not necessarily the same as gender identity. read books with them that show the
accepted for who they are. A boy may like to dress up in dresses, for many different ways to be a boy, a girl, or
example, but not identify as female. someone who doesn’t identify as either
boy or girl.
DID YOU KNOW ✔ Allow your child to wear the clothes and
You can’t tell a child’s gender
What is transgender (trans)? play with the toys they like.
identity from their choice of toys or clothes. A person whose gender identity doesn’t ✔ Show your child that people of all
How a child expresses themself (gender match the sex they were assigned at birth. genders exist and live happy lives.
expression) does not necessarily signal who ✔ Watch out for any bullying your child
they know themself to be (gender identity). may face.
Independence
What is independence? DID YOU KNOW
Your child’s growing ability to do things for It’s okay for your toddler to feel frustration. Letting her feel frustrated while she works on
herself. simple tasks is part of how she learns to problem solve.
HOW TO
Help your toddler become
independent
✔ Let her do what she can on her own,
from dressing to washing.
✔ Let her make simple choices, like
choosing which cup to drink from.
✔ Encourage her to do things by herself,
even if she needs extra time.
✔ Encourage new activities that she’ll likely
do well.
✔ Give her time to repeat a skill as she’s
learning, like letting her master stacking
2 blocks before giving her a third.
✔ Be positive about her efforts, whether or
not she’s successful.
Empathy
What is empathy?
Your child’s growing ability to understand
and care about how others feel.
BRAIN BUILDER
Point out when your child has done
something kind (“Look how happy you
made Jessica by sharing your toy”) or not
so kind (“When you hit your sister, it made
her sad”). By helping him understand how
his actions affect others, you’re building his
social and emotional skills.
Play
Play is a key way that your toddler develops and Play by Age 12 to 24 months: Mover and Shaker
learns about the world around her.
Your toddler may:
6 to 12 months: Explorer • be able to handle smaller toys
What Does Play Teach Your toddler may: • show her personality through play (active or
Your Child? • grab at things quiet? focused or multi-tasker?)
Play helps your child grow in all 5 major areas • search for things you hide • take part in “parallel play” (playing beside
of development. It builds: another child but not with them)
• enjoy dumping, stacking and pouring things
• physical skills like crawling, climbing, Try giving her:
walking, running, using her fingers, seeing Try giving her:
and hearing • balls to chase and, later, to kick and throw
• balls
• social skills like cooperating, sharing, being • pop-up toys
• sturdy toys on wheels
polite and leading and following others • sit-and-ride toys
• blocks
• emotional skills like identifying and dealing • nesting toys
with feelings 24 to 36 months: Dreamer and Connector
• rattles
• cognitive skills like problem solving, Your toddler may:
using her imagination, figuring out how • bowls of different sizes
• play with another child
things work, and learning shapes, colours
• enjoy imaginary play
and numbers
DID YOU KNOW
• language skills like learning the names for Try giving her:
things, forming sentences, telling stories Outdoor play helps your child
• dress-up clothes and props
and listening develop in all areas. She’ll use her
imagination, learn to play with others, and
build her confidence by trying new things,
KEY TAKEAWAY like going down a big slide for the first time.
HOW TO
Encourage your toddler to play
✔ Provide a variety of toys suited to her age.
✔ Offer her choices and let her decide
what she plays.
✔ Set aside time to play with her each day.
✔ Encourage both active and quiet
activities.
✔ Give her praise and proudly show
her work.
✔ Take a break when she seems tired,
hungry, uninterested or over-stimulated.
✔ Give her lots of free, unscheduled
playtime for her to be creative and see
where her imagination leads her.
Toys
The best toys encourage your toddler to learn, Safer Toys
explore and use his imagination. They don’t TRY THIS
have to be fancy or expensive. Reduce overall injuries by:
See if the toy fits through a toilet
• ensuring toys are well-made and fit your paper roll. If it does, it’s too small.
Household items
child’s age
• plastic bowls for filling and dumping
• not using toys with broken, sharp or
• pillows for climbing and making caves Reduce strangling hazards by:
loose pieces
• old clothes for dress-up • not using toys with strings, cords or ribbons
• ensuring your toy box lid can’t trap your
• the bath for supervised water play toddler inside or slam down on him more than 15 cm (6 inches) long
• making sure paint is non-toxic and not peeling • being careful with things like pull toys and
Classics
skipping ropes
• blocks • reading the safety information on toy labels
• dump trucks • avoiding toys with small batteries and Reduce suffocation hazards by:
• stuffed animals making sure your toddler doesn’t take out • making sure that any toy that your toddler
any batteries can climb into has a way out and air holes
• play food
• taking away all packaging from new toys
• garages and farms
• books BE AWARE
Nature’s toys
Almost half of toy-related deaths DID YOU KNOW
are caused by choking.
• dirt and sand If you have to shout to be heard
above a toy, it’s too noisy and can damage
• water
Reduce choking hazards by: your child’s hearing.
• stones
• avoiding any toy that fits in your toddler’s
mouth
TRY THIS • making sure all toys are at least 3½ cm FAMILY STORY
When you put a toy out, put (1½ inches) wide and 6 cm (2½ inches) long We worried about how to keep
another away. Your toddler may be • not letting your child play with things that our toddler away from her 7-year-old
overwhelmed if he has too many to choose can break into pieces, like styrofoam and brother’s small toys. He decided to play
from. And rotating toys can be just as egg cartons with them in his own room. We put a
exciting as getting something new. gate on the door so his sister wouldn’t
• not letting him suck or chew on balloons
feel shut out.
Screen Time
What is screen time?
Why? Safer Screens
• Screen time cuts into quality time for you and
Time spent in front of a computer, smartphone, You may not be able to eliminate screens
your toddler.
tablet, television or gaming device. completely. After all, sometimes handing over
• It takes time away from active play and social your phone or turning on the TV may seem
time that can help your child develop and like the only way to get a few minutes to start
bond with others. dinner or gather your thoughts. But you can
DID YOU KNOW • Screens over-stimulate your toddler with too make screen time as healthy as possible by:
Toddlers who have too much much colour, movement and sound. ✔ thinking about when and why screens are
screen time are more likely to act out, have • Although some types of content are better in use, and not using them out of habit, for
trouble sleeping, be less ready to start than others, most screen time teaches your entertainment, or for background noise
school, and be an unhealthy weight. toddler little or nothing. (See Safer Screens) ✔ choosing TV shows for children that have
• Screens display ads showing unhealthy foods, familiar characters, use songs and repetition
violence and stereotypes. to teach, and encourage participation
Less is Better
✔ being nearby whenever your child uses
The Canadian Paediatric Society recommends no
screen time for children under the age of 2, and
BRAIN BUILDER screens or – better yet – watching together
and talking about what you’re seeing
a maximum of 1 hour a day for older toddlers. Be aware of your own screen use.
Overall, the less screen time, the better. Are you looking at your phone rather than ✔ making screen time positive time. Skyping
focusing fully on your child? Remember: with out-of-town relatives, for example, can
when you pay attention to and interact actually benefit your child.
with your toddler, you’re helping her build
a healthy brain and body. Try turning
time TRY THIS
Screen e off your phone notifications – or simply
th
before putting your phone away – when you’re Make a family screen time plan
:
age of 2 spending time with her. that you all agree to. Include:
0 Screen time • daily time limits for kids and parents
for older
• no screens during mealtimes
toddlers: TRY THIS
Max 1 hr • no screens in kids’ bedrooms
Instead of handing over your
a day phone or tablet, keep your toddler busy
• no TV on as background noise
with a few board books, a simple large-piece Ensure your child care providers know
puzzle or a shape-sorter or stacking toy. the rules, too.
BRAIN BUILDER
• Run your finger along the words
as you read them.
• Choose books with rhymes and repetition.
• Use different voices for characters.
• Point to the objects in picture books and
name them, or ask your toddler to name
them. For animals, ask him what sound
they make.
• Talk about how the things in the book
connect to your child’s world. If there’s a
dog in the story, for example, talk about
a neighbour’s pet.
34 Toddler Development • If You Have Concerns About Your Toddler’s Development Toddler’s First Steps
FEEDING YOUR TODDLER
Eating Well
Eating well is key to your toddler’s healthy Mealtime Roles Hunger and Fullness Cues
growth and development. Children who eat
well from an early age have the best chance You and your toddler each have a role to play
in healthy eating. What are hunger and fullness cues?
of becoming healthy eaters for life.
Signs your young toddler gives you when
You can encourage healthy eating by: Your role is to:
she knows she’s hungry or full.
✔ offer a variety of healthy foods
• breastfeeding or giving your child expressed
milk for 2 years or longer ✔ offer meals and snacks at regular times
She’s hungry if, when food is offered, she:
each day
• introducing solid foods at about 6 months • opens her mouth
✔ respond to your toddler’s hunger and
• working towards offering 3 meals and 2 or • leans forward excitedly, kicks her feet or
fullness cues
3 snacks at regular times each day waves her hands
• providing a variety of nutritious foods Your toddler’s role is to:
She’s full if, when food is offered, she:
• watching for your toddler’s cues to see when ✔ choose whether to eat
she’s hungry or full • pushes it away
✔ choose what to eat from what she’s offered
• creating a calm eating environment • closes her mouth
✔ choose how much to eat
• eating together as a family • turns her head away
Cannabis may:
• leave THC in your breastmilk for up to 30 days
FAMILY STORY
• lead to issues with your child’s motor
development When my toddler is pulled in
close to my body to breastfeed, I forget
• decrease your milk supply
about the rough-and-tumble kid. He’s my
• make you drowsy and unable to respond to baby again, even if only for a moment.
your toddler’s needs
42 Feeding Your Toddler • Cleaning and Sterilizing Feeding Equipment Toddler’s First Steps
FEEDING YOUR TODDLER
Toddler’s First Steps Feeding Your Toddler • Healthy Eating During Breastfeeding 43
FEEDING YOUR TODDLER
44 Feeding Your Toddler • When Your Toddler Stops Breastfeeding Toddler’s First Steps
FEEDING YOUR TODDLER
TRY THIS
If your child is used to drinking
milk from a bottle, try slowly decreasing the
amount of milk you put in each time. If she
wants more to drink, offer a small amount of
water in a separate bottle. Use an open cup
with meals and snacks.
Feeding by Age
6 to 9 Months Feeding tips:
✔ Start introducing soft foods and finger foods
Your toddler may: at about 6 months.
• continue to breastfeed ✔ Give her family foods made with little or no
• pick up food between her fingers and palms added salt or sugar.
and put it in her mouth ✔ Offer solid foods before or after
• bite off food breastfeeding, depending on what works
best. This may change over time.
• close her lips around a cup held for her
✔ Start with iron-rich foods, then add more
• chew by moving food from front to back and
variety.
to the sides of her mouth, by munching up
and down, and by grinding ✔ Offer iron-rich foods 2 or more times a day.
✔ Offer her sips of clean water from an open
cup, but don’t let her fill up on water.
DID YOU KNOW ✔ Introduce common allergens one at a time.
Human milk is still your child’s These include milk and milk products,
most important drink. eggs, peanuts and tree nuts, soy, seafood
(fish, shellfish), wheat and sesame. (See
Understanding Food Allergies)
TRY THIS ✔ Start with small amounts of food and give
your toddler more based on her hunger and
Instead of jarred baby food, try
fullness cues.
mashing soft and cooked family foods with
a fork. Add water or human milk to moisten, ✔ Give her lots of practice feeding herself.
and try mixing different foods together. ✔ Be aware of choking hazards. (See Reducing
Choking Hazards)
• want to sit at the family table and try to ✔ Give her the same foods prepared in
feed herself different ways.
What are family foods?
✔ Include healthy higher-fat foods like
Foods that your whole family normally eats salmon, avocado, cheese and nut butters.
Feeding tips: at mealtime. Giving your toddler foods from
the family table rather than store-bought ✔ Be aware of choking hazards.
✔ Sit and eat with your toddler.
baby food provides her with a wider range (See Reducing Choking Hazards)
✔ Offer solid foods before or after you
of textures, tastes and nutrients. ✔ Give her water to drink between meals
breastfeed, whichever works better. This
and snacks.
may change over time.
✔ Give your child enough time to eat.
✔ Offer iron-rich foods 2 or more times a day.
DID YOU KNOW
✔ Keep offering new family foods with ✘ Limit foods high in salt and sugar like
Fruit juice is a sugary drink, and
different textures. chips, candy and cookies.
children don’t need it. If you offer it, limit it
✔ Give her small amounts of clean water in an to no more than 125 ml (½ cup) a day, and ✘ Limit sugary drinks like fruit juice, pop,
open cup. serve it at meal or snack time in an open cup. sports drinks, energy drinks and fruit-
✔ Be aware of choking hazards. (See Reducing flavoured beverages.
Choking Hazards) ✘ Avoid all foods and drinks with caffeine or
✔ Offer family foods that are made without BRAIN BUILDER artificial sweeteners.
added sugar or salt. Include your toddler at the family
✔ Encourage her to feed herself. table and eat together as often as possible. KEY TAKEAWAY
Sharing meals will help her learn language
Help your toddler get enough iron
✘ Don’t give your child honey or food made and social skills and get used to family
by offering iron-rich foods 2 or more times
with honey, even if it’s cooked or pasteurized. foods. Use the time to talk to her about
a day at meals or snacks. Include meat,
(See Safe, Healthy Foods and Drinks) what she sees, tastes and feels.
poultry, fish, iron-fortified infant cereals,
cooked eggs and tofu, and mashed, cooked
beans and other legumes.
✔ Consider switching from whole (3.25%) milk • lower-fat milk (1% or 2%) or
to lower-fat milk (1% or 2%). unsweetened fortified soy beverage
Meals and Snacks per day Vegetables and Fruit Whole Grain Foods Protein Foods
6 to 9 2-3 solid food feedings and • soft-cooked vegetables • iron-fortified infant • well-cooked, finely minced or shredded
1-2 snacks. • grated raw vegetables cereal pieces of meat, poultry, fish or shellfish
months
Continue to breastfeed. • soft fruits like banana • cooked rice and pasta • mashed or diced cooked egg, tofu or
and kiwi • oat ring cereal legumes
If your child isn’t breastfeeding,
give store-bought infant formula – • canned fruit • crackers, roti, pita • peanut butter or nut butter spread thinly
cow’s milk-based or soy-based (if • peeled, pitted and on toast or crackers
vegan or for cultural or religious cooked hard fruits like • yogurt, cottage cheese, cheese
reasons). apple and pear
9 to 12 3 solid food feedings and • soft-cooked vegetables • iron-fortified infant • small, well-cooked pieces of meat, poultry,
1-2 snacks. • grated raw vegetables cereal fish or shellfish
months
Continue to breastfeed. • soft fruits like banana • whole grain toast, pasta, • mashed or diced cooked egg, tofu, legumes
and kiwi rice, crackers • peanut butter or nut butter spread thinly
If your child isn’t breastfeeding, you
can start to offer small amounts of • canned fruit • small pieces of bannock, on toast or crackers
whole (3.25%) cow’s milk (see Safe, • peeled, pitted and tortillas, roti and other • yogurt, cottage cheese, cheese, whole
Healthy Foods and Drinks). cooked hard fruits like breads (3.25%) cow’s milk
apple and pear
12 to 24 3 meals and 2-3 snacks. • small pieces of soft fruits • whole grain hot and • well-cooked ground, chopped or cubed
and vegetables cold cereal lean meat, poultry, fish or shellfish
months Continue to breastfeed.
• cooked or grated • brown rice, whole grain • mashed legumes
If your toddler isn’t breastfeeding,
vegetables pasta, congee • whole cooked egg
offer 2 cups (500 ml) whole (3.25%)
cow’s milk or soy follow-up formula • whole grain crackers • cooked tofu
with meals (see Safe, Healthy Foods and toast • peanut butter or nut butter spread thinly
and Drinks). • whole grain bannock, on toast or crackers
tortillas, roti and other • yogurt, cottage cheese, cheese, whole
breads (3.25%) cow’s milk or soy follow-up formula
24 to 36 3 meals and 2-3 snacks. • small pieces of soft fruits • whole grain hot and • well-cooked ground, chopped or cubed
and vegetables cold cereal lean meat, poultry, fish or shellfish
months Continue to breastfeed if you wish.
• cooked or grated • brown rice, whole grain • mashed legumes
If your child isn’t breastfeeding,
vegetables pasta, congee • whole cooked egg
offer 2 cups (500 ml) lower-
fat cow’s milk (1% or 2%) or • whole grain crackers • cooked tofu
unsweetened fortified soy and toast • peanut butter or nut butter spread thinly
beverage each day with meals (see • whole grain bannock, on toast or crackers
Safe, Healthy Foods and Drinks). tortillas, roti and other • yogurt, cottage cheese, cheese, lower-fat
breads cow’s milk (1% or 2%) or unsweetened
fortified soy beverage
Toddler’s First Steps Feeding Your Toddler • Healthy Meal and Snack Ideas 51
FEEDING YOUR TODDLER
✔ If your home was built before 1989, you may At 24 months, you might choose to switch to Drinks to avoid
have lead pipes. Flush them each morning lower-fat cow’s milk (1% or 2%). If your child is
by running your water for 1 to 5 minutes or over 24 months and doesn’t drink cow’s milk or ✘ Sugary drinks like fruit juice, fruit and
until it turns cold. fortified goat’s milk, offer her unsweetened soy fruit-flavoured drinks made from powders or
beverage fortified with calcium and vitamin D. crystals, pop, sports drinks, and slush drinks.
✔ If you have your own private water
These have too much sugar and not enough
supply, have your water tested according ✔ Limit milk to no more than 3 cups (750 ml)
per day, so your toddler has room for other of the nutrients toddlers need.
to provincial guidelines. Learn more at
healthlinkbc.ca. healthy foods. ✘ Drinks with caffeine like soft drinks, sports
drinks, energy drinks, coffee, coffee-slush
✔ Always follow “boil water” advisories in ✘ Avoid letting your toddler sip milk between drinks, tea and hot chocolate. These can
your area. meals or snacks, which can lead to tooth decay. make your toddler excited and anxious and
make sleep more difficult.
HOW TO DID YOU KNOW ✘ Fruit juices labelled “unpasteurized” may
Check drinking-water Plant-based drinks from rice, contain dangerous bacteria.
advisories online potato, almond, hemp and coconut milk ✘ Toddler nutritional supplement drinks
• For provincial advisories, visit gov.bc.ca/ don’t have enough calories, fat or protein aren’t needed.
gov/content/environment/air-land-water/ for your growing toddler. Don’t offer them
If you’re concerned about your child’s food intake
water/water-quality/drinking-water- in place of human milk, cow’s milk, formula
or growth, talk with your health care provider.
quality/notices-boil-water-advisories. or fortified soy beverage.
• For First Nations Health Authority advisories,
visit fnha.ca/what-we-do/environmental- TRY THIS
health/drinking-water-advisories. DID YOU KNOW With meals, offer milk. Between
Your toddler can continue to meals, offer water. And continue to
breastfeed or drink expressed human milk breastfeed for as long as you choose.
until she’s 24 months or older.
52 Feeding Your Toddler • Safe, Healthy Foods and Drinks Toddler’s First Steps
Foods Fish Foods to avoid
Fish provides many nutrients including protein ✘ Honey can give your baby botulism, a
Vegetables and fruit and omega-3 fats, which are important for food-borne illness. Never give honey or
All vegetables and fruit – fresh, frozen, canned brain and eye development. Offer it to your foods containing honey to a child less than
and dried – are healthy choices when they’re child regularly. Some fish, though, is high in 1 year old.
prepared and stored safely. mercury, and should be limited. ✘ Sprouts (like alfalfa and mung bean) can
contain harmful bacteria. Only give them to
your toddler if they’re thoroughly cooked.
BE AWARE
✘ Unpasteurized cheese made from raw milk
Fish high in mercury can damage
may contain harmful bacteria that can cause
your toddler’s growing brain.
toddlers to become very sick or even die.
Check the label, and choose only cheeses
High-mercury fish – serve in limited made from pasteurized milk.
amounts only:
• fresh and frozen tuna Highly processed foods
• canned albacore tuna from outside of Canada Highly processed foods – store-bought and
Meat, fish, poultry, seafood and eggs from restaurants – are high in salt, sugar and
• shark
Reduce the risk of food poisoning by cooking saturated fats. Offer them less often and in
all meats until they’re brown (not pink) and the • marlin smaller amounts. Try:
liquids run clear. Cook fish until it flakes with a • swordfish • offering water instead of sugary drinks
fork. Cook eggs until yolks are hard. Try braising
• escolar • limiting processed meats like ham, bacon,
and stewing to keep meats soft enough for your
toddler to chew. • orange roughy sausage, hot dogs and luncheon meats
If your child is 6 to 12 months, offer no more • reducing store-bought cookies, cakes, candy,
than 40 grams (less than 1 oz) a month. chocolate, chips and salty snacks
If your child is 24 to 36 months, offer no more • offering fewer frozen packaged foods like
than 75 grams (2½ oz) a month. pizza and pasta
• choosing healthier menu options when
Fish not high in mercury – serve regularly: eating out
• all other fish sold in Canada • making homemade
versions of favorite
• canned light tuna including skipjack,
restaurant foods like
yellowfin and tongol
fries, chicken strips
• Canadian albacore tuna (fresh, frozen and and pizza
canned). Look for “Product of Canada” on
the label.
Toddler’s First Steps Feeding Your Toddler • Safe, Healthy Foods and Drinks 53
FEEDING YOUR TODDLER
54 Feeding Your Toddler • Vitamin and Mineral Supplements Toddler’s First Steps
FEEDING YOUR TODDLER
• staying with your toddler while she eats Hard • Fruit with pits or seeds • Removing pits and seeds
• not letting her eat while she’s walking or • Raw vegetables like carrots that • Grating or chopping finely, or cooking
riding in a stroller or a vehicle can break into chunks and slicing into thin sticks
• Whole nuts, whole peanuts, seeds • Chopping finely
Picky Eating
Toddlers are “eaters in training,” so it’s normal
for them to go through periods of picky eating.
With time and practice, your child will learn
to enjoy a variety of foods. Be patient, and
encourage her by:
✔ letting her smell, touch and taste new foods
✔ offering a new food along with at least one
food she already likes
✔ letting her eat at her own pace
✔ offering foods with a variety of textures
✔ being a good role model by eating a
balanced, healthy diet
✔ letting her help prepare meals and snacks
TRY THIS
Let your toddler choose a new
vegetable or fruit each time you visit
the grocery store. Or try growing a few
vegetables together. Many children will
happily eat foods they’ve chosen, grown
or helped prepare.
58 Feeding Your Toddler • Vegetarian and Vegan Toddlers Toddler’s First Steps
Iron
Why it’s needed: for red blood cells, growth
and brain development
Where it’s found: iron-fortified infant cereal,
enriched cereals, quinoa, beans, peas, lentils,
tofu, blackstrap molasses
Calcium
Why it’s needed: to build strong bones
and teeth
Where it’s found: human milk, store-bought
infant formula (cow’s milk- or soy-based),
unsweetened fortified soy beverage (after
24 months), calcium-fortified tofu, cheese,
yogurt, baked beans, blackstrap molasses;
smaller amounts in almond butter, sesame
butter, oranges
BRAIN BUILDER
If you’re vegan, your milk may be
low in vitamin B12. Help your toddler get
enough of this brain-building nutrient by
eating B12-fortified foods or taking a daily
supplement.
Toddler’s First Steps Feeding Your Toddler • Vegetarian and Vegan Toddlers 59
FEEDING YOUR TODDLER
Toddler’s First Steps Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Your Toddler’s Growth 61
YOUR TODDLER’S GROWTH, LEARNING AND HEALTH
Physical Activity
Benefits of Being Active Activities to Try
FAMILY STORY
Regular physical activity is key to your toddler’s From 6 to 12 months, play with your child
My husband and I knew our
growth and good health. It: on the floor several times a day. Try:
daughter would copy what we did. So
✔ builds strong muscles and bones • putting toys just out of her reach so she we started walking together every night
✔ strengthens her heart and lungs has to work to get them after work. When she was small, we
✔ teaches her new skills like throwing • holding and rocking her would put her in the stroller. As she got
and running • playing physical games, like peekaboo older, she walked beside us. It was a
and patty cake great time to reconnect while getting
✔ builds her confidence in walking,
fresh air and exercise.
climbing and balancing • choosing toys that get her to move
✔ gives her energy From 12 to 36 months, help your child get at
✔ improves her posture least 3 hours of various activities throughout FAMILY STORY
✔ lowers her stress the day. Try:
We lived in a small condo. By
• going outside to explore evening we were just too tired to take our
• throwing a ball son to the park again, but he needed more
HOW TO
• jumping activity. So we set up a small slide in the
Encourage physical activity
living room. He loved it!
• chasing bubbles
✔ Try different activities together.
• using the slide, swings and climbing gear
✔ Create safe spaces indoors and outdoors
at the park
for her to crawl, roll and explore.
(See Childproofing Your Home) • including her in active tasks like walking to
the store, cleaning the house, washing the
✔ Praise her efforts.
car and gardening
✔ Plan activities with other families.
• having her walk rather than ride in a stroller
✔ Limit her screen time. (See Screen Time)
• swimming and doing other activities at your
✔ Spend time outdoors. recreation centre
✔ Be physically active yourself.
From age 3 on, give your child at least 3 hours
of activity each day. Have her spend at least
1 of the 3 hours in energetic play.
62 Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Physical Activity Toddler’s First Steps
YOUR TODDLER’S GROWTH, LEARNING AND HEALTH
12 to 16 hours total, 14 hours total, 11 to 14 hours total 11 to 14 hours total 12 hours at night
including naps including naps No morning nap Afternoon nap of 1 to 2 hours Short nap
2 naps (morning and afternoon) Longer afternoon nap (an hour or less)
of 1 to 2 hours each
TRY THIS ✔ Ensure your child get lots of physical activity during the day, but not right before bed.
If your toddler has trouble going ✔ Set a before-bed routine including a bath, a book and a quiet cuddle of 20 minutes or less.
to sleep or isn’t sleeping well, keep a sleep ✔ Keep the sleep area quiet.
diary. Over a couple of weeks, write
down when she sleeps and for how long. ✘ Don’t give your toddler food or drinks with caffeine, like chocolate or pop.
Note any patterns, then experiment with ✘ Be careful about too much screen time during the day (see Screen Time), and turn off screens
changes in nap times and routines. well before bedtime.
Make any changes gradually – just 5
to 10 minutes every second day.
Toddler’s First Steps Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Sleep and Your Toddler 63
Falling Asleep on Her Own increase the amount of time you let her cry
TRY THIS before going in. But always check on her right
Your child may have gotten used to being away if she sounds very upset and may be sick
If you have concerns, talk with your
breastfed or rocked to sleep when she was a or injured.
health care provider or a public health nurse.
baby. But by learning to fall asleep on her own,
They can screen for any issues that may make
she’ll be able to settle herself when she partially
it difficult for your toddler to sleep well.
wakes during the night. BRAIN BUILDER
Try: Give your toddler some choices at
✔ feeding her earlier in the bedtime routine Waking in the Night bedtime, like which story to read or which
pajamas to wear.
(about 15 minutes before putting her into
bed) so she doesn’t associate feeding DID YOU KNOW
with sleep
If your child falls asleep somewhere
✔ setting a bedtime routine that includes other than her own bed, she’s more likely to DANGER
singing a song or reading a story wake during the night. If your toddler is under 12 months
✔ putting her into bed awake, patting her old, always put her to sleep on her back
gently until she settles, then saying to lower the risk of Sudden Infant Death
Your child may wake up during the night if she’s Syndrome (SIDS).
goodnight and leaving
too hot or cold, if she’s wet, hungry, teething or
✔ sitting in a chair chose by the bed with your sick – or for no reason at all. You can help her
hand on her if she has a hard time settling, learn to go back to sleep on her own by: Safer Cribs
and moving the chair further away each night
• keeping the lights off when you feed or Ensure:
✔ using a nightlight in the corner or having a change her during the night
light on just outside her room if she doesn’t • the crib is approved by Health Canada (ask
• not making nighttime a time for chatting or your health care provider if you’re not sure)
like the dark playing
• the mattress is in the lowest position if your
• gradually shortening any nighttime feedings toddler is able to sit up
FAMILY STORY so she doesn’t fully wake up
• there are no items she could climb on to fall
We started reading to our If she cries for no particular reason, you can help out of the crib
daughter right before bed when she her learn to settle herself by:
• there are no mobiles or other hanging objects
was a baby. It helped her slow down and 1. going to her, but not picking her up that could strangle her
understand it was time to sleep. When she 2. calmly tucking her back into bed and telling
was a toddler, she always wanted a story, See Baby’s Best Chance for more information on
her it’s time to sleep
so it got her into bed. Now, at 12, she’s old safer sleep for your 6-month-old.
3. leaving the room
enough to read herself. But she still loves
this close, quiet time with one of us. 4. repeating as needed until she falls asleep
You may choose to wait a short time – 2 or
3 minutes – after she starts crying before going
to her. If so, over several days you can slowly
64 Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Sleep and Your Toddler Toddler’s First Steps
Safer Beds attach to the side of your bed are dangerous, as Any long hair is tied back so it can’t get
your child can get trapped between your mattress wrapped around your child’s neck.
If your toddler is trying to climb out of the crib, and the crib.
it’s time to move her to a bed. Ensure your No older children or pets are in the bed.
toddler’s bed:
• has a simple design DID YOU KNOW DANGER
• has no spaces between the mattress and the If you have more than one baby, Never share a bed if:
headboard or walls it’s safest to have them in their own sleep • your baby was born prematurely or
• has its headboard (not the side of the bed) spaces. If they share the same crib, put weighed less than 2½ kg (5½ lb) at birth, or
them head to head, not side by side.
against the wall • you or your partner:
• is low to the floor – smoke, or if you smoked while pregnant
• has a carpet or quilt on the floor in case she When your child is between 6 months and a – have taken any substances that might
falls out of bed year old, the safest place for her to sleep is in make you sleep more heavily, like alcohol,
her own Health Canada-approved crib. But medicine, cannabis or other drugs
• has safety rails on all sides
many families prefer to bedshare for cultural or Have another adult available to look after
• is the lower bunk if using a bunk bed set personal reasons. And some find that they end your baby if you’re drinking alcohol or using
• isn’t by a window, if possible, and that all up bedsharing, even if they hadn’t planned to. any substances.
windows in the room have locks
Talk with your health care provider about how
to balance your family’s wishes with the risks
Sleep-Related Infant Death
Bedsharing of bedsharing. And if you do choose to share a
bed, do so as safely as possible. Ensure: Sleep-related infant death can happen by
accident (usually when a child is smothered
What is bedsharing? Your baby is far away from pillows, blankets
or suffocated) or by Sudden Infant Death
Sleeping in the same bed with your child. and duvets.
Syndrome (SIDS or “crib death”) – the
Your baby is on her back. unexplained death of a healthy child while
Is it recommended? She isn’t swaddled. sleeping. Lessen the risks by:
Bedsharing can be risky, especially for some The mattress is on the floor to reduce the • putting your baby down to sleep on her back
babies. Bedsharing is not recommended for risk of a fall. on a firm surface in her own safe sleep space
infants under 12 month of age. The mattress is firm. (No waterbeds, • making your home smoke-free
Why not? pillowtops, air mattresses or feather beds.) • keeping your child warm, but not hot
Sharing a bed with your child – or even sleeping The child is on the outside of the bed, not • breastfeeding
with her on a sofa or in a chair – puts her at risk between adults.
• keeping pillows, toys, heavy blankets and pets
of suffocation. She could get wedged against There’s space around the bed so the child out of your child’s bed
the mattress or between cushions, or you or your can’t get trapped between the mattress and
partner could roll on her and smother her. This risk • carefully considering the risks of bedsharing
the wall or a side table.
increases if you’re very tired or have been drinking
alcohol or using drugs. Even co-sleeper cribs that The adults in the bed both know that the
child is in the bed and are comfortable with it.
Toddler’s First Steps Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Sleep and Your Toddler 65
YOUR TODDLER’S GROWTH, LEARNING AND HEALTH
66 Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Learning to Use the Toilet Toddler’s First Steps
BRAIN BUILDER
Give your child a book to look at
while she sits on the potty chair. Check the
library for books about toilet learning.
TRY THIS
If you’re comfortable, let your
toddler watch you or another same-sex
parent, brother or sister use the toilet.
Seeing what you’re doing can help her
figure it out for herself.
FAMILY STORY
Right from birth, I said things
to my son like, “Doesn’t it feel good to be
dry?” So when it came time to start toilet
learning, he already understood the idea
of “wet” versus “dry.”
Toddler’s First Steps Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Learning to Use the Toilet 67
YOUR TODDLER’S GROWTH, LEARNING AND HEALTH
68 Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Looking After Your Toddler’s Teeth Toddler’s First Steps
Keeping Teeth Healthy Floss
DID YOU KNOW
Once your toddler’s teeth touch each other, floss
“Baby teeth” aren’t just for babies. Brush them for him once a day. Don’t let him floss his
The molars at the back of your child’s mouth own teeth, because he could damage his gums.
Once the first tooth comes in, it’s time to start
won’t fall out until he’s about 12 years old.
brushing your toddler’s teeth. Use a soft brush
with nylon bristles. (Silicone and rubber bristles Protect teeth from damage
don’t remove plaque as well.) And replace the
Teething brush often – about every 3 months or after
✔ Use the right size car seat, booster seat and
seat belt.
Some toddlers aren’t bothered by teething the bristles lose shape, and after your child has
while others are uncomfortable and fussy. Most been sick. ✘ Don’t let your toddler chew on hard things.
children will drool.
✘ Don’t let him walk around with anything in
You can help ease your toddler’s discomfort by: HOW TO his mouth.
✔ letting him chew on a clean teething ring Brush your toddler’s teeth ✘ Don’t offer your toddler pop or other
or wet cloth that’s been chilled in the fridge 1. Put a grain-of-rice-sized amount of sugary drinks.
(not the freezer) fluoride toothpaste on a child-sized ✘ Don’t put him down to sleep with a bottle.
✔ wiping and massaging his gums with a clean toothbrush twice each day. Increase
finger, cloth or toothbrush to a pea-sized amount at age 3. Offer healthy food and drinks
✔ using a bib to catch drool and wipe his face 2. Have your child lie in your lap, on the
✔ Offer your child meals and snacks at
change table or on the floor.
Don’t use: regular times.
3. Brush gently. Sing or chat while brushing.
✘ teething gels or ointments, which can numb ✔ Offer milk with meals, and water between
your toddler’s throat and make it hard for 4. If he’s able (likely by about age 3), let him meals and with snacks.
him to swallow spit as needed.
✔ Limit fruit juice to ½ cup (125 ml) per day.
✘ teething necklaces, which can strangle or 5. Put the toothpaste away out of reach.
✔ If you offer fruit juice, use it as part of a
choke him 6. Repeat twice a day – once in the morning meal or snack and put it in an open cup to
✘ food like teething biscuits or frozen fruit, and again after the last evening feeding. avoid the tooth decay that constant sipping
which can lead to tooth decay can cause.
Use fluoride ✔ At 6 months, start helping your child drink
from an open cup instead of using a bottle
DID YOU KNOW Fluoride makes tooth enamel stronger and
or sip cup.
better able to fight decay. Check with your
Although teething may be
health department to see if there’s fluoride in See Safe, Healthy Foods and Drinks to learn more.
uncomfortable for your toddler, it doesn’t
your local water. If not, be doubly sure that your
cause fever. If he has a fever, treat it as
child’s toothpaste includes it. Teach your child
you normally would (see When Your
to spit the toothpaste out, but don’t worry if
Toddler is Sick).
he’s not always successful. Even children under
3 can use (and swallow) small amounts of
fluoride toothpaste safely.
Toddler’s First Steps Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Looking After Your Toddler’s Teeth 69
See the dentist Safer soothers
BE AWARE
Your toddler should see a dentist by the time Look for:
he’s 12 months old or within 6 months after his If there are chalky white spots or
crescents on your toddler’s teeth along the • one-piece design
first tooth appears. During this first visit, the
gums that don’t brush off, he may have the • firmly attached nipple
dentist will look in your toddler’s mouth. It’s
beginnings of tooth decay. Fluoride can • no cord (use a clip with a short ribbon instead –
also a good time to talk about dental care and
help stop these spots from turning into but only when your toddler isn’t sleeping)
discuss how often your child should visit.
cavities that need filling. See your dentist, or
contact your local public health unit to ask • no toy or stuffed animal attached
70 Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Looking After Your Toddler’s Teeth Toddler’s First Steps
YOUR TODDLER’S GROWTH, LEARNING AND HEALTH
Toddler’s First Steps Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Looking After Your Toddler’s Vision 71
YOUR TODDLER’S GROWTH, LEARNING AND HEALTH
How Hearing Typically Develops Remember – all children develop at their own pace.
Months 8 9 12 24
• Tries to copy changes • Tries to copy • Understands simple requests like “open • Points out objects or body parts when asked
in voice pitch speech sounds your mouth” • Uses several simple words
• Babbles (“gaga”) • Understands • Likes to repeat sounds • Follows basic directions like “get the ball”
simple words • Tries to say a few words • Puts 2 words together like “my teddy”
like “bye-bye” • Knows the names of people and common things
• Hears when you call from another room
72 Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Looking After Your Toddler’s Hearing Toddler’s First Steps
YOUR TODDLER’S GROWTH, LEARNING AND HEALTH
Preventing Sickness
You can help your toddler stay healthier by Why immunize?
doing 3 simple things: DID YOU KNOW
Immunization is the best way to prevent your
1. getting her immunized child from getting serious diseases including: Vaccines included in the routine
immunization schedule are free for
2. washing her hands • chicken pox (“varicella”)
B.C. children.
3. keeping surfaces clean • diphtheria
• flu (“influenza”)
When to immunize
Immunization • Haemophilus influenzae
Different vaccinations are given at different
• hepatitis B
ages. Children in British Columbia usually
What is immunization (“inoculation” / • measles and German measles (“rubella”) receive vaccinations at:
“vaccination”)? • meningitis • 2 months
Protecting your child from a disease before it • mumps • 4 months
has a chance to make her sick.
• polio • 6 months
• rotavirus • 12 months
How it works
• tetanus • 18 months
Immunizations protect against diseases
• whooping cough (“pertussis”) • 4 to 6 years
caused by germs such as bacteria and viruses.
Immunizations help your child’s body make Thanks to immunization, some of these diseases • 11 years (Grade 6)
antibodies to fight diseases. are now rare in Canada. But the germs that • 14 years (Grade 9)
cause them still exist and can make any child
Immunizations are usually given by injection, The flu shot is given each year.
who isn’t immunized very sick.
by nose (“intranasal”) or by mouth (“oral”).
If your child has missed any of her
immunizations or if she is going outside
DID YOU KNOW Canada and may need extra immunizations,
When you immunize your talk with your health care provider.
child, you’re also protecting the wider
community. When more people are If you have questions or concerns, call your
vaccinated, disease can’t spread as easily immunization provider before your visit.
and those most at risk – the elderly and
babies too young for vaccination, for
example – are safer.
Toddler’s First Steps Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Preventing Sickness 73
Is it safe?
TRY THIS The flu shot
Immunization is very safe. Some may cause
Use the Child Health Passport The influenza vaccine protects against the
soreness or slight fever, but these side effects
(available through your public health viruses expected to cause influenza in the
are minor and usually last only 1 or 2 days.
nurse) or the immunizebc.ca app to next cold and flu season. It doesn’t protect
keep track of your child’s immunizations. against the germs that cause colds. A flu shot
Contact your public health unit or DID YOU KNOW is only effective for 1 year.
check immunizebc.ca for updates to the
Serious side effects to The flu shot is recommended for all children
immunization schedule, too.
immunizations (such as high fever) are each year. It’s free to those 6 months to 5 years
very rare. Choosing not to immunize is old, for older children with serious health
much more dangerous, since the risks of problems, and for children living with people
HOW TO the disease are far greater than the risk at risk and those who visit health care facilities.
Prepare your toddler for an of side effects. Parents, babysitters and other caregivers of
immunization young children should also get a flu shot.
1. Just before you leave, calmly tell her If your toddler is getting a flu shot for the first
she’s getting an immunization that time, they’ll need 2 doses, given 4 weeks apart.
will help her stay healthy. Answer her
questions honestly but soothingly. Use
words like “poke” or “squeeze” instead of
“pain” or “hurt.”
2. Try not to let her sense any anxiety
you’re feeling.
3. Consider putting on a numbing cream or
patch before your appointment. If your
child is over 12 months old, ask your
health care provider in advance where
the immunization will be given so you’ll
know where to apply it.
4. Dress her in clothes that let you easily
uncover her arms and legs.
5. Bring a comforting toy or blanket.
6. Hold her on your lap while she’s getting
the immunization. Comfort her by
cuddling or breastfeeding her.
7. Try distracting her with a toy or by
helping her do deep breathing.
74 Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Preventing Sickness Toddler’s First Steps
Hand Washing Keeping Surfaces Clean
TRY THIS
Hand washing is the best and easiest way to You can help keep your toddler healthy by
If you can’t wash your hands, rub
help prevent your toddler from getting sick. regularly cleaning surfaces including:
alcohol-based hand sanitizer between
Wash your hands and your child’s often, your hands (and your toddler’s) until the • kitchen counters, cutting boards and utensils
especially: gel dries. • high chairs, bibs and dishes
• after changing a diaper or using the toilet • strollers, cribs, changing tables and toys
• after blowing your nose or your child’s • garbage bins
• after touching animals, tidying up after them DID YOU KNOW • pet toys, beds and litter boxes
or cleaning the litter box Antibacterial soap and cleaners
• when caring for a sick child help grow “superbugs” – germs that are too
strong to treat with antibiotics. Use plain
• when preparing food
soap instead.
• before eating
HOW TO
Make cleaning easier
HOW TO 1. Keep cleaning supplies handy, but
Wash hands properly locked away from your toddler.
1. Use plain soap and warm water. 2. Clean the most important areas first.
2. Wash for 15 to 20 seconds – about the 3. Use plain soap and water. To save time,
time it takes to sing Happy Birthday or a try paper towels or disposable wipes.
favourite song of the same length. 4. Clean up vomit, diarrhea, blood and
3. Rinse. pet waste using 1 part bleach in 9 parts
4. Dry well with a clean towel. water. Wear rubber gloves.
5. Wash cleaning cloths often, and don’t
use them to wipe your child’s face.
PARTNERS
What You Can Do
Split up the household cleaning tasks with
your partner. Have older children help, too.
Toddler’s First Steps Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • Preventing Sickness 75
YOUR TODDLER’S GROWTH, LEARNING AND HEALTH
76 Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • When Your Toddler Is Sick Toddler’s First Steps
Cough and Cold Flu SEEK CARE
What is a cold? What is the flu (“influenza”)? Call your health care provider if
your toddler has signs of dehydration:
A virus that can cause runny nose, cough, A virus that can cause more serious fever,
fever, sore throat and fussiness. Most headache, muscle pain, runny nose, sore • peeing less (fewer than 4 wet diapers in
children get several mild colds every year. throat, tiredness, cough, nausea, vomiting and 24 hours in infants and fewer than 3 wet
These usually improve within a week and go diarrhea. Flu can be life-threatening to very diapers in 24 hours in older children)
away within 2 weeks. young children and those with other illnesses. • being extra thirsty
• no tears when crying
What you can do What you can do • dry skin, mouth and tongue
✔ Let him rest. ✔ Call your doctor or HealthLink BC at 8-1-1 • faster heartbeat
✔ Give him plenty of fluids like water or your if you think your toddler has the flu. • sunken eyes
milk, if you’re still breastfeeding. ✔ Let him rest. • greyish skin
✔ Keep the room comfortable but not hot. ✔ Breastfeed him often and give him plenty of • sunken soft spot on the head (if 18 months
✔ Use a cool air humidifier, if you have one. water and other fluids. or younger)
✔ Put saline drops in his nose. ✔ Keep the room comfortable but not hot.
✔ Use an extra pillow to raise his head by ✔ Give him extra attention.
2½ to 5 cm (1 to 2 inches).
✔ Practise good hand washing. HOW TO
✔ Give him extra attention.
(See Preventing Sickness) Help prevent the spread of
✔ Practise good hand washing. colds and flu
✔ Give him acetaminophen (Children’s
(See Preventing Sickness)
Tylenol). Read the label carefully to find the ✔ Get the flu vaccine each fall.
✔ Give him acetaminophen (Children’s right amount. (See Preventing Sickness)
Tylenol). Read the label carefully to find the
right amount. ✔ Wash hands regularly.
(See Preventing Sickness)
✔ Throw away tissues right after use.
DANGER
✔ Cough and sneeze into shirt sleeves,
Never give your toddler aspirin
not hands.
or anything else containing acetylsalicylic
acid (ASA), which can damage his brain ✔ Avoid touching the face.
and liver. Don’t give him decongestants or ✔ Disinfect doorknobs, light switches,
antihistamines unless recommended by your keyboards and other shared items.
health care provider. And avoid cough and
✔ Eat well and stay active.
cold medicines, which don’t usually work for
young children and can be harmful. Always
check with your health care provider before
giving your toddler any new medication.
Toddler’s First Steps Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • When Your Toddler Is Sick 77
Visiting a Health Care Provider
FAMILY STORY DID YOU KNOW
My toddlers played with their Antibiotics (which attack bacteria)
HOW TO doctor kit a lot. They used the stethoscope can’t cure colds or flu (which are caused
Make health care visits easier and pretend needles to make each other by viruses). And taking antibiotics means
Before you go: “feel better.” I think that’s why they were risking side effects, killing good bacteria,
never scared of the doctor. and adding to the growth of superbugs.
✔ Try to visit when your toddler is well-
rested and fed.
✔ Show him what the health care worker
might do, like look in his ears.
✔ Encourage him to play “doctor” or
“dentist” with a toy.
✔ Read him books about doctor or
dentist visits.
✔ Pack a favourite blanket or toy.
At the visit:
✔ Talk to him about what’s happening and
why. “The nurse is going to give you an
immunization in the arm to keep you
healthy. I’ll hold you the whole time.”
✔ Answer his questions simply and
directly.
✔ Find ways to praise his efforts, even if he
cries the whole time.
78 Your Toddler’s Growth, Learning and Health • When Your Toddler Is Sick Toddler’s First Steps
PARENTING YOUR TODDLER
Growing as a Parent
Being a parent is one of the most important and
rewarding things you can do. It’s also hard work.
80 Parenting Your Toddler • Why Does Your Toddler “Act Out”? Toddler’s First Steps
PARENTING YOUR TODDLER
Positive Discipline
Learning to be independent is an important Positive Discipline vs. Step 1: Set the stage for
part of your toddler’s development. Sometimes positive behaviour
this means he’ll do things that you don’t like.
Punishment
You can help set your child up to behave his
Rather than punishing him, though, you can use
best – and avoid problems before they start.
positive discipline to guide him. What is punishment?
A focus on training that uses harsh Communicate with your toddler:
consequences to make a child obey. May • Get his attention before you speak.
DID YOU KNOW • Get down to his level and make eye contact.
be physical (like spanking), verbal (like
Discipline doesn’t need to be shouting) or emotional (like shaming). • Use simple words to tell him what you want
negative to be effective. By showing Punishment isn’t effective and doesn’t help him to do.
rather than training your child, you can your child develop healthy life skills.
help him learn to understand his feelings • Make only 1 request at a time.
and act in healthy ways. At the same time, • Listen to what he’s saying.
you’ll build a strong and loving bond • Help him learn to name and express his
What is positive discipline?
between parent and child. feelings.
A focus on showing your child how to act in
positive ways. • Tell him what to do instead of what not to do:
“Please ride on the sidewalk,” for example,
Positive discipline: instead of “don’t ride on the street.”
• is built on love and trust
• shows respect for your child and his
feelings
BRAIN BUILDER
By responding to your toddler’s
• is fair
behaviour in a warm and consistent way,
• suits your child’s age you’ll help build his brain to handle big
• is consistent emotions and make healthy decisions (see
• occurs right when the problem behaviour Brain Development).
happens
• is explained in a way the child can
understand
84 Parenting Your Toddler • Dealing With Common Challenging Behaviours Toddler’s First Steps
Dawdling (Moving Slowly)
DID YOU KNOW
✔ Give her plenty of notice before changing activities.
Like many parents, you may be
uncomfortable when your child shows big ✔ Build in extra time to do things, especially when you know that switching activities will be hard,
emotions like anger or sadness. It might like putting toys away to get ready for bed.
remind you of hard times in your life, or you ✔ Tell her what you need her to do clearly and simply: “Put on your coat now, please.”
may just be less comfortable sharing feelings. ✔ Put away toys, turn off the TV and get rid of other distractions when you’re in a hurry. And give her
Understanding why you feel uncomfortable some control over the situation by giving her a job to do.
with your toddler’s emotions can help
you respond to your child in a healthy and
helpful way, instead of reacting out of your
own sadness, anger or frustration.
BRAIN BUILDER
By staying calm when your child is
having a tantrum, you’re showing her how
to respond to stressful situations.
Whining
✔ Check if she’s hungry, tired or uncomfortable.
✔ Help her find the words to express what's
bothering her.
✔ Praise her when she’s not whining.
Toddler’s First Steps Parenting Your Toddler • Dealing With Common Challenging Behaviours 85
PARENTING YOUR TODDLER
Staying Calm
Parenting is challenging, and staying calm can What you can do:
be hard for anyone. All parents need support, ✔ Stick to routines to help your toddler feel
TRY THIS
and it doesn’t make you a bad parent to ask for and act his best. No parent stays calm all the time.
it. Remember that your toddler will learn how to If you lose your temper, apologize to
handle stress by watching you. Learning to stay ✔ Learn about what kinds of behaviour are
your toddler. This will model the kind of
calm will be good for you and help your toddler typical at different ages. (See Typical Child
behaviour you expect from him.
develop in a healthy way. Development by Age)
✔ Get as much rest as you can.
DID YOU KNOW ✔ Eat well.
DID YOU KNOW
Staying calm as a parent can be ✔ Make time for yourself, even a moment here
even harder if you grew up with a caregiver Spanking is not a good option.
and there.
who had a temper or who was easily upset. It can hurt your toddler, cause him to be
✔ Spend time outdoors. afraid of you, and teach him that hitting
Think about how your toddler’s behaviour
makes you feel and about how your ✔ Accept that you may not always be able to others is okay.
parents responded to you when you were soothe your child, and that letting him cry
little. This can help you understand your for a few minutes won’t harm him.
reactions and make it easier to stay calm ✔ Talk with someone about your feelings, and
and respond to your child in healthy ways. to other parents about your experiences.
✔ See the Resources section for services
What is Shaken Baby Syndrome? and supports.
Toddler’s First Steps Parenting Your Toddler • Helping Your Toddler Through Change 87
On the day of the birth, try: At home after the birth, try: As your children grow, try:
✔ keeping your toddler’s day as normal ✔ keeping up your previous routines ✔ valuing their differences, instead of
as possible ✔ making time to do the special things you comparing them
✔ having her visit the baby when no other used to do together ✔ encouraging them to play together and
visitors are there ✔ being extra patient with her, even if she also giving them time apart
✔ letting her hold and talk to the baby returns to old habits ✔ letting each one know they’re special
✔ talking about how much the baby looks like ✔ including her in your time with the baby, like ✔ not giving them labels like “the baby”
her or how much the baby seems to like her having her sit with you while you breastfeed ✔ setting clear rules for how they treat
✔ not using the baby as a reason for not doing each other
something. Instead of “I can’t play with you
because I have to feed the baby,” for instance,
try, “When I’ve finished feeding the baby,
let’s play!”
88 Parenting Your Toddler • Helping Your Toddler Through Change Toddler’s First Steps
Dealing With Loss and Grief Family breakup
DID YOU KNOW
If your family breaks up, your toddler needs to
Death Even if you don’t tell your toddler feel safe and secure.
about a serious loss, she’ll sense that
Your toddler doesn’t understand that some Help your toddler by:
something is different. And not telling
things are final. So she may have little or no
her may make her more afraid. ✔ being calm and patient, despite your feelings
reaction to someone’s death. Or she may cry,
be angry, or worry that someone else will die. ✔ giving her lots of love and attention, and
telling her you won’t leave her
Before facing a loss, prepare your toddler by:
TRY THIS ✔ keeping to your usual routines and rules
✔ teaching her that death is a part of life by
When a loved one dies, don’t ✔ letting her ask questions, even if she asks
talking about things like the changing of
say he’s “gone to sleep” or “gone away” or the same ones over and over
the seasons
your toddler may get scared of sleeping
✔ giving direct and simple answers
✔ answering questions truthfully without or travelling.
creating new fears. If she asks, “Will you ✔ telling her it’s not her fault
and I die?” you can say, “Yes, we all die, but ✔ letting her talk happily about her other
Mommy won’t die for a very long time and parent, and not speaking negatively about
neither will you.” FAMILY STORY them to her
When my brother died ✔ making sure any new home she’ll be
When a loved one or a pet dies, try:
unexpectedly, I gently explained to our spending time at is comfortable and
✔ using simple words 2-year-old that his uncle had died and welcoming
✔ giving details only if she asks wouldn’t be back again. He just said “OK”
and that was it. A few weeks later, though, See Family Resources in the Resources chapter
✔ talking about your cultural and religious
he asked when he was coming to visit. He for more information.
beliefs about death
didn’t understand that it was final.
✔ letting her express her feelings
✔ showing her that grief is normal and will TRY THIS
change over time Finding emotional support After a separation, think of
✔ keeping daily routines so she feels secure yourself and your ex-partner as co-
When you’re going through difficult times,
workers with the shared job of caring for
✔ talking about the person or pet and looking it’s okay for your child to see that you’re
your toddler. If you’re not ready to talk to
at pictures upset. Explain to them what’s going on and
each other calmly, use email or texts, or
✔ giving her extra love and attention how you’re feeling in a way that they can
write information in a book that you send
understand. But remember that your child is
back and forth. And ask a friend or relative
not the right person to go to for emotional
to help with pickup and drop-off.
support. Find another adult – a friend, health
care provider or counsellor – to talk to.
Toddler’s First Steps Parenting Your Toddler • Helping Your Toddler Through Change 89
PARENTING YOUR TODDLER
Parenting Issues
Emotional Upset Perinatal depression Perinatal anxiety
As a parent, it’s normal to experience emotional
What is perinatal depression? What is perinatal anxiety?
ups and downs. But it’s important for you and
your loved ones to be able to recognize when A serious, long-lasting depression that can Recurring intense worry or disabling fear
you might need some extra support. happen during pregnancy or after the birth. that can happen during pregnancy or after
the birth.
Cultural Differences in
TRY THIS
Parenting FAMILY STORY Trade babysitting time with other
Cultural beliefs and traditions can enrich a My mother couldn’t read English single parents.
toddler’s life. But when you and your partner and didn’t know any of the English nursery
have different cultural backgrounds, conflicts rhymes. So I took her to the library to pick
may come up. out picture books. She used them to tell BE AWARE
Talk with your partner about what cultural her own stories to my son in Mandarin.
Try not to treat your toddler as an
values are most important to them. Tell your adult. Talk over serious issues with other
partner what’s important to you. Then find the adults. And when you feel overwhelmed,
core values that you share. Use these to create ask for help from friends, family members
FAMILY STORY
your own family traditions. or professionals.
It was important to us that our
toddler was exposed to Hindi. I sang her a
traditional nursery rhyme about 10 birds
sitting on a tree. Soon, she could count to DID YOU KNOW
10 in my native language and knew the About 20% of Canadian children
Hindi names of birds and trees. live in single-parent families. About 80% of
these families are headed by women.
KEY TAKEAWAY
DID YOU KNOW You’re the expert in your toddler’s
Like all children, toddlers with needs. You understand him better than
special needs want to play, try out new anyone else. Use this knowledge to
skills and get love, attention and praise. And help the professionals develop the best
they go through many of the same stages treatment plan for him.
of development as other children, just at
different rates.
94 Parenting Your Toddler • Balancing Work and Child Care Toddler’s First Steps
Babysitters Helping Your Toddler Adjust to
DID YOU KNOW
When you need a casual babysitter, remember – Child Care
If you hire in-home care, you’re the younger your child, the older the babysitter
considered an employer, and you must Before leaving your child with a child care
should be. Most children under 12 aren’t old
make Employment Insurance and Canada provider, try:
enough to deal with problems and emergencies.
Pension Plan payments. Contact the Canada • talking to your toddler about it
Revenue Agency and WorkSafeBC for more Before you leave your child with a new
• reading books together about child care
information. caregiver – whether a friend, family member or
babysitter – prepare by: • letting him spend time with the caregivers
and the other children with you there
• watching them hold and play with your child
• asking how they would deal with crying or Make his first days easier by:
HOW TO
Find an in-home caregiver fussiness • staying as long as you need to
• Ask family and friends. • watching as they feed and diaper him • asking the caregiver to give him extra
• explaining your safe sleep routines (see Sleep attention
• Call a placement or nanny agency.
and Your Toddler) • letting him bring a blanket or toy
• Look online.
• asking if they’ve taken a babysitting course • telling him when you’re leaving and assuring
• Check newspapers and bulletin boards him that you’ll return at a certain time
for ads. • being clear about your Dos and Don’ts:
✔ Follow your bedtime and safer sleep • creating a routine in which you say and do the
• Contact the Child Care Resource and same things each time you leave
Referral (CCRR) program in your area. routines.
(See Child Care in the Resources chapter) ✔ Check your child often while he’s sleeping. Make every day easier by:
✔ Contact you if there are problems. • letting the caregiver know if you’ll be late
• giving your child lots of extra attention when
✘ Never hit or shake a child.
FAMILY STORY you return
✘ Don’t heat his bottle in the microwave or
My mother, who grew up in Iran, • talking to him about what he did while you
on the stove. Use a container of warm tap
took care of my child. She and my daughter were away and telling him what you did
water instead.
regularly attended a drop-in held in Farsi. • asking the caregiver about your child’s day
My mother was able to meet with mothers When the babysitter arrives, show them where
and grandmothers and speak her native things are kept – including the list of emergency
language, and my daughter was able to numbers. Tell them where you’re going, when
play with other children. you’ll return and how you can be reached.
Toddler’s First Steps Parenting Your Toddler • Balancing Work and Child Care 95
Dealing With Unhappiness Helping Pay for Child Care
96 Parenting Your Toddler • Balancing Work and Child Care Toddler’s First Steps
TODDLER SAFETY
KEY TAKEAWAY
As parents, we want to protect our
children from everything. But toddlers also
need the chance to run, play and test their
personal limits. You can find balance by
providing a safe environment and keeping
a close eye on your child while still giving
her the freedom to explore and have fun.
Try stepping back while she plays in the
sandbox at the park or makes a mess with
her toys on the living room floor.
Car Safety
Child Car Seats New or used?
HOW TO
Your child must be in a car seat every time he Second-hand seats aren’t recommended. If you Install a rear-facing car seat
travels in a car, no matter how short the trip. do use one, inspect it carefully and check for
recalls and for its expiration date. Don’t use a 1. Place it facing the back window in the
Ensure your car seat has: seat that’s been in a crash. back seat following the manufacturer’s
• a CMVSS label instructions.
• at least 2 sets of slots for 3-point or 5-point harness? 2. Tilt it back a maximum of 45°. If your
shoulder harness straps and child’s head falls forward, the seat needs
If possible, use a more-secure 5-point harness,
2 sets for crotch straps to be tilted back more.
which holds your child at his shoulders and hips.
3. Secure the seat with its universal
Infant seat, child seat or booster seat? anchorage system or with the car’s seat
Step 1: Infant seat – Use from birth until your DANGER belt. Check your car’s owner’s manual to
child reaches the seat’s weight limit. If an airbag inflates and hits see if you need to use a locking clip.
Step 2: Rear-facing child seat – Use until your your child’s seat, he could be seriously hurt
child is at least 1 year old and weighs at least or killed.
9 kg (20 lb). • Never place a rear-facing car seat where HOW TO
there’s an airbag. Put your child in the car seat
Step 3: Forward-facing child seat – Use until
your child weighs at least 18 kg (40 lb). • If you have to put your toddler in the 1. Fasten the harness snugly so that only
front seat, turn off the airbag and put 1 finger fits between it and your child’s
Step 4: Booster seat – Use until your child is the seat as far back as it will go. collarbone.
9 years old or 145 cm (4 feet 9 inches) tall.
• Keep your toddler’s seat away from 2. Raise the chest clip to your child’s
side airbags. underarms.
Rear-facing or front-facing?
3. Ensure the harness straps are at his
A rear-facing seat is safest for your child, and
shoulders or slightly below. Raise the
must be used until he’s at least 1 year old and
harness straps when his shoulders are
weighs at least 9 kg (20 lb). Continue to keep
level with the next highest slot.
your child facing the back of the car – even if he
has to fold his legs a bit – until he reaches the 4. Dress him in clothes that have sleeves
rear-facing weight limit of the seat or his head is and legs and aren’t too heavy.
within 2½ cm (1 inch) of the top of the seat. At 5. If he needs a blanket, put it on after he’s
that point, it’s time to either find another model strapped in.
that he can use rear-facing, or switch his current
seat to face the front of the car.
Equipment Safety
Toddlers may be small, but they need a lot of Safer Chairs
stuff. You can keep it all safe by: BE AWARE
✔ choosing equipment that’s right for your Chairs that hook on a table can fall.
High chairs
toddler’s height, weight and age If you need to use one, be sure to attach it to
Look for: a strong table away from table legs. Before
✔ supervising your toddler whenever she’s
• wide base putting your child in, pull on it to check
using it
that it’s solidly attached. If your child is over
✔ ensuring it’s in good condition by checking • strong tray locks
13½ kg (30 lb) or is very active, don’t use a
often for sharp edges, loose wheels, broken • proper locking device on folding chairs hook-on chair.
brakes and upholstery tears • no moving parts for your child to get caught
✔ using safety straps and a helmet as in when you’re changing the position of the
appropriate chair or tray
✔ following manufacturers’ instructions for Ensure:
assembly, care and use
• safety strap is done up
• chair is placed away from appliances,
BE AWARE windows, blind cords, mirrors and
Before using any second-hand sharp corners
equipment, check for safety recalls at
canada.ca/en/health-canada/services/ Booster chairs
consumer-product-safety/advisories- Ensure:
warnings-recalls.htm.
• booster is safely strapped to a chair, and child
is securely strapped in
• no shoulder straps are tangled around
child’s neck
BE AWARE
Keep the chair away from walls
and counters. Your child might be strong
enough to push against them and tip
herself over.
BE AWARE BE AWARE
Don’t jog with your child in a Don’t use a carrier while skiing,
stroller until she’s at least a year old and jogging, biking, cooking or doing any other
her neck muscles have strengthened. And risky activity. Your child could be bumped,
always use the 5‑point harness. burned, thrown out or crushed under you.
Ensure:
BE AWARE
• used with 1 or 2 children weighing no more
Children under 12 months than 45 kg (100 lb) total
shouldn’t ride with you on a bicycle. Their
back and neck muscles can’t support the • toddler can’t reach the wheels
weight of a helmet and can be damaged by • toddler is protected from dirt thrown by tires
the bumping. KEY TAKEAWAY
Tricycles, scooters and push/run bikes Your child must wear a helmet
Ensure all are: whenever she’s playing on a riding toy,
bike, scooter or tricycle, or when she’s
TRY THIS • sized so your toddler can pedal while sitting
riding in a trailer or bike seat.
Before riding your bike with comfortably
your toddler in a carrier or trailer, practise • used only with supervision
turning, stopping and climbing hills with a
• never ridden near cars, swimming pools or stairs TRY THIS
bag of flour.
Store your child’s helmet on the
Helmets
handlebars, ready for the next ride. Don’t
Look for: leave it in the sun or in the back window of
DID YOU KNOW • child-sized the car, where it can be damaged by heat.
Bicycle trailers are more stable than
• covers the upper forehead
child seats mounted on a bike. In either case,
you can be thrown off balance if your child • adjustable strap with quick-release buckle Safer Toys
moves suddenly. • bright colour so she’s easily seen
See Toys.
• not purchased second-hand
✔ Keep him indoors if the temperature is below free of garbage, needles and broken glass ✘ very loose clothes
-25°C (-13°F) or if the wind chill is -28°C (-18°F) and plastic. ✘ drawstrings
or more. ✔ Use equipment that’s no more than 1½ m ✘ dangling scarves or bike helmet straps
✔ If you take your toddler sledding, (5 feet) high.
tobogganing, skating or skiing, be sure that ✔ Ensure equipment has guardrails and
he wears the right helmet for the sport (not a barriers, is in good condition and well- BE AWARE
bike helmet) and that he wears it correctly. anchored, and has no sharp edges. Always ensure that a trusted adult
✔ Make sure the surface under equipment is stays with your child and watches while he
plays. He can fall or get caught – or even
What to wear sand, wood chips or rubber.
strangled – in playground equipment.
✔ layers of loose clothes
✔ warm coat that will stay dry, with sleeves
that are snug at the wrist
✔ warm, non-slip shoes that will stay dry
✔ mittens
✔ warm hat without ties
✔ the right helmet for the sport
BE AWARE
If your toddler’s cheeks, nose,
ears, fingers or toes are white or numb, he
may have frostbite. Bring him indoors right
away. Take off any wet clothes, then put
his frostbitten areas into warm water until
feeling returns. This may cause stinging.
Water Safety
Playing in and around water is fun, soothing and Safer Baths and Bathrooms Safer Pools and Garden Ponds
good for your toddler’s development.
✔ Turn your water heater down to 49°C (120°F) ✔ Empty your toddler pool when you’re not
You can make it safer by: to help prevent burns. using it. Turn it upside down so it won’t
• supervising and staying within arm’s reach ✔ Check the water temperature with your wrist collect rain.
whenever your child is around water or elbow before putting your child in the tub. ✔ Cover and lock a hot tub that’s not
• holding hands when you’re at the beach or ✔ Use warm water, not hot. being used.
near a pool or pond ✔ Teach him to sit, not stand, in the tub. ✔ Ensure any nearby pool is fenced and
• having your child wear a well-fitting, covered, and that pool chemicals are locked
✔ Use a toilet seat lock.
government-approved life-jacket when he’s away. Be sure there’s nothing your child
around water or in a boat could climb on to get into the pool area.
✘ Don’t let your toddler play with sink or
tub taps. ✔ Teach your child to play safely around
water – no running, pushing, diving or
DANGER ✘ Don’t use a bath ring or bath seat as a
unsupervised swimming.
substitute for supervision.
It only takes seconds for a toddler
to drown, so stay within arm’s reach – even ✘ Never leave your toddler alone in the ✘ Don’t let your child use a hot tub, which can
if he’s wearing a life-jacket. bathroom. overheat him.
✘ Don’t rely on toys like water wings or air
mattresses to keep your toddler safe.
DID YOU KNOW ✘ Don’t rely on a pool cover to keep a child out.
A life-jacket is safer than a personal
floatation device (PFD). Life-jackets float
DID YOU KNOW
better and will keep your toddler’s mouth
out of the water. Swimming lessons don’t mean your
toddler is safe in the water. Always supervise
him and stay within arm’s reach.
BE AWARE
Children under 5 shouldn’t touch
turtles, snakes or other reptiles. They carry
germs that can make your toddler very sick.
110 Toddler Safety • Violence and Other Abuse in the Home Toddler’s First Steps
Getting Help
DID YOU KNOW DID YOU KNOW
Help is available if you’re living with violence or
In Canada, about 100,000 women Most sexual abuse of children is by
other abuse.
and children seek shelter from family someone they know.
Contact: violence every year.
• VictimLinkBC toll-free at 1-800-563-0808 or
VictimLinkBC@bc211.ca for confidential help TRY THIS
in 110 languages 24 hours a day FAMILY AND FRIENDS Help your toddler develop
• crisis lines What You Can Do personal boundaries by letting him
• women’s shelters If you think a child is being abused or refuse kisses, hugs and tickling. This will
• child protection social workers neglected, you must report it to a child teach him the confidence to say no to
welfare worker. Phone 1-800-663-9122 inappropriate touching.
• your health care provider anytime, day or night. If you think the child
• the public health nurse is in immediate danger, call 9-1-1.
• the police EMERGENCY
See Abuse and Neglect in the Resources chapter Child Sexual Abuse If you believe your child has been
for more information. sexually abused, contact the police.
What is child sexual abuse?
DID YOU KNOW Abuse that may include intercourse, fondling,
If you grew up with abuse as a touching, exposing genitals, inappropriate
child, it can affect the decisions you make watching of a naked child or showing
as an adult. You may be more likely to pornography to a child. Child sexual abuse
enter into abusive relationships and find is a crime. Normal experimenting between
it harder to know what to do. But you can children of the same age is not sexual abuse
build a healthy, safe life. If you need help, (see Sexual Development).
contact VictimLinkBC at 1-800-563-0808 or
VictimLinkBC@bc211.ca. You can help keep your toddler safe by:
✔ always knowing where he is
✔ only leaving him in the care of people
EMERGENCY you trust
If you think you’re in immediate ✔ being aware of who’s around him when
danger, leave with your toddler and he’s in someone else’s care
call 9-1-1.
✔ encouraging him to tell you if he’s not
comfortable with someone
✔ paying attention when he avoids someone
Toddler’s First Steps Toddler Safety • Violence and Other Abuse in the Home 111
Canada’s food guide
Eat a variety of healthy foods each day
Make water
your drink
of choice
Pub.: 180594
PDF Cat.: H164-257/1-2019E-PDF ISBN: 978-0-660-28757-7
© Her Majesty the Queen in Right of Canada, as represented by the Minister of Health, 2019
Choose
Print Cat.: H164-257/1-2019E ISBN: 978-0-660-28758-4
whole grain
foods
Healthy eating is more than the foods you eat. It is also about where, when,
why and how you eat.
Be mindful of your eating habits
¡ Take time to eat
¡ Notice when you are hungry and when you are full
Cook more often
¡ Plan what you eat
¡ Involve others in planning and preparing meals
Enjoy your food
¡ Culture and food traditions can be a part of healthy eating
Eat meals with others
HealthLink BC gives you 24-hour access to non-emergency health To learn about programs for people with alcohol or other drug problems, talk
information and services in more than 130 languages – just a phone call to your health care provider or contact any of the following resources:
or click away.
HealthLink BC offers support 24 hours a day in more than 130 languages.
Call 8-1-1 to:
Phone: 8-1-1
• speak with a nurse about your symptoms
For deaf and hearing-impaired assistance (TTY), call 7-1-1.
• talk to a pharmacist about your medication questions
Website: healthlinkbc.ca
• get healthy eating advice from a dietitian
• find nearby health services and resources The Alcohol and Drug Information and Referral Line offers
• get information about physical activity from a qualified exercise confidential, free information.
professional Phone toll-free: 1-800-663-1441
For deaf and hearing-impaired assistance (TTY), call 7-1-1.
Sheway operates in Vancouver and provides comprehensive health and
Website: healthlinkbc.ca social services to women who are either pregnant or parenting children
less than 18 months old and who are experiencing current or previous
Public Health Offices/Community Health Centres offer a wide issues with substance use. The program consists of prenatal, postnatal
range of services to promote physical, emotional, social, communication and infant health care; education and counselling for nutrition, child
and cognitive development for infants and children. Their services include development, addictions, HIV and Hepatitis C, housing and parenting.
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your local health authority for more information. formula and clothing.
Website: vnhs.net/programs/sheway
Strong Start is a registered Canadian charity that helps children learn to read.
Website: strongstart.ca
BC Women’s Hospital Woman Abuse Response Program VictimLinkBC is a province-wide telephone help-line for victims of family
Phone: 604-875-3717 and sexual violence and all other crimes. VictimLinkBC operates 24 hours a
day, 7 days a week, and provides service in 110 languages. A victim service
Website: bcwomens.ca/our-services/support-services worker will help you find information on the victim services closest to you.
HealthLink BC Files are a series of easy-to-read fact sheets on a variety Provincial Health Services Authority of BC
of environmental, public health and safety topics. Several HealthLink BC
Files are available on topics related to parenting your toddler, including Phone: 604-675-7400
HealthLink BC File #68d, Iron Contents in Food, and HealthLink BC File #45, Website: phsa.ca
Should I Get My Well Water Tested? You can access the HealthLink BC Files
online or request a copy from your local provincial health unit/department
and various other offices, including employee health and wellness services, Hearing
native health centres and physicians’ offices and clinics.
Website: healthlinkbc.ca/services-and-resources/healthlinkbc-files
British Columbia Early Hearing Program is the first province-wide
screening program to check hearing in babies born in British Columbia.
Website: phsa.ca/our-services/programs-services/bc-early-hearing-program
Health Authorities
Northern Health Immunizations
Phone: 250-565-2649
HealthLink BC Files contain information on many vaccination-related
Website: northernhealth.ca topics.
Website: healthlinkbc.ca
Indigenous Services
Aboriginal Head Start Association of BC includes 12 urban
Aboriginal Head Start preschool sites that provide early childhood
education and services to Aboriginal children and their families.
Website: ahsabc.net
Website: phsa.ca/transcarebc Canadian Pediatric Society promotes quality health care for Canadian
children and establishes guidelines for pediatric care. The organization
Pflag Canada offers peer-to-peer support, striving to help all offers educational materials on a variety of topics, including pregnancy,
Canadians with issues of sexual orientation, gender identity and gender immunizations, safety issues and teen health.
expression. They support, educate and provide resources to anyone with
Phone: 613-526-9397
questions or concerns. They offer local, practical and emotional peer-to-
peer family support for individuals and their loved ones challenged by Website: cps.ca
gender/sexual identity.
Caring for Kids is a website that provides parents with information
Website: pflagcanada.ca
about their child’s health and well-being. Developed by the Canadian
Paediatric Society.
QMUNITY is a non-profit organization based in Vancouver that works to
improve queer, trans and Two-Spirit lives. They provide a safer space for Website: caringforkids.cps.ca
LGBTQ2S people and their allies to fully self-express while feeling welcome
and included. Their building serves as a catalyst for community initiatives Oak Tree Clinic at B.C. Women’s Hospital & Health Centre provide
specialized, interprofessional HIV care for women across the lifespan.
and collective strength, and they provide personal support, information
This includes care from birth, throughout childhood, adolescence and
and referrals for queer, trans and Two-Spirit people of all ages to live
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beyond – in a safe environment.
STI clinic, free legal advice through Access Pro-Bono, and an employment
drop-in clinic. Phone: 1-888-711-3030
Phone: 604-684-5307 ext. 100 Website: bcwomens.ca/our-services/specialized-services/hiv-care-for-
women-families or bcwomens.ca
Email: reception@qmunity.ca
Website: qmunity.ca
Mental Health
Medical Resources For information about perinatal depression support groups, contact your
public health unit.
BC College of Family Physicians
Phone: 604-736-1877 BC Reproductive Mental Health Program offers resources on
maternal mental health, including tools that you can use yourself. Through
Website: bccfp.bc.ca
referral from your health care provider, the program offers counselling for
depression in pregnancy and after birth.
Website: reproductivementalhealth.ca
HealthyFamilies BC
Website: healthlinkbc.ca
Your child will go through amazing changes between 6 and 36 months of age. Toddler’s First Steps is packed with
practical information on child development, nutrition, health and wellness, parenting and safety – all of which will
help you provide the environment and support that contribute to your toddler’s healthy growth and development.
HealthLink BC
British Columbians have trusted, free health information just a phone call or click away.
HealthLink BC gives you quick and easy access to non-emergency health information
and services. Speak with a nurse about symptoms, talk to a pharmacist about your
medication questions, find information about physical activity from a qualified exercise
professional, or get healthy eating advice from a dietitian. HealthLink BC will also direct
you to other health services and resources available in your community.
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Dial 8-1-1 or visit healthlinkbc.ca.
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