Fairydust Meadows looked at the warped ruler in her hands and felt anxious.

She walked over to the window and reflected on her grey surroundings. She had
always loved dull Skegness with its fantastic, fierce fields. It was a place that
encouraged her tendency to feel anxious.

Then she saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of
Jenna Grey. Jenna was a sweet deity with wide eyebrows and slimy spots.

Fairydust gulped. She glanced at her own reflection. She was a brutal, lovable, tea
drinker with dirty eyebrows and fluffy spots. Her friends saw her as a wonky,
wasteful wally. Once, she had even jumped into a river and saved a brawny chicken.

But not even a brutal person who had once jumped into a river and saved a brawny
chicken, was prepared for what Jenna had in store today.

The hail pounded like thinking rabbits, making Fairydust barmy.

As Fairydust stepped outside and Jenna came closer, she could see the thirsty glint
in her eye.

Jenna gazed with the affection of 8570 caring barbecued badgers. She said, in
hushed tones, "I love you and I want some more Facebook friends."

Fairydust looked back, even more barmy and still fingering the warped ruler.
"Jenna, Is that real leather," she replied.

They looked at each other with fuzzy feelings, like two prickly, putrid puppies
bopping at a very virtuous birthday party, which had reggae music playing in the
background and two spiteful uncles partying to the beat.

Suddenly, Jenna lunged forward and tried to punch Fairydust in the face. Quickly,
Fairydust grabbed the warped ruler and brought it down on Jenna's skull.

Jenna's wide eyebrows trembled and her slimy spots wobbled. She looked delighted,
her emotions raw like a good, gentle gun.

Then she let out an agonising groan and collapsed onto the ground. Moments later
Jenna Grey was dead.

Fairydust Meadows went back inside and made herself a nice cup of tea.

THE END