SPEAKHOUR - Communication and Speaking Course

(Sivakumar Palaniappan)

Empathy and Listening in Communication

Your ability to understand others and feel what the other person is feeling from deep within is
Empathy. Empathy is an important ability that improves your capacity to communicate with others,
to be part of a team, and to better your leadership skills.

Practising empathy helps you relate better and more with others. When you readily understand the
other person, either a colleague or a family member, your interpersonal relationship improves.
Empathy is fundamental to building trust and effective relationships, which in turn is essential for
better communication.

Sympathy vs Empathy:
Empathy is when you feel and understand someone’s feelings, attitudes, and experiences. It is the
understanding of other’s experiences with everyday life events. Sympathy is related to feeling sorry
for another person’s grief and troubles. More than being passively sympathetic, it’s vital to become
actively empathetic in our workplace.

Cognitive Empathy vs Emotional Empathy

If you are empathising with your If I were in his or her situation,

thoughts - cognitive empathy. what will I be thinking.

If you are empathising with your If I were in his or her situation,

feelings – emotional empathy. what will I be feeling.

Role of Empathy in Communication and Speaking

You don’t have to agree with others all the time, but you must be able to understand what’s the
rationale behind the other’s thoughts, words and deeds.

Listening in Communication
We often think that communication is talking. We interrupt, advise, judge, analyse, criticize, argue,
moralize, threaten, divert, etc. But good communication requires good listening as well as talking.

With all the listening we do; we usually think that we are good at it. In reality most us are not good
listeners. We don’t really listen to others completely. This means when we talk to our spouse, boss,
colleagues, customers for few minutes most of us aren’t listening us and it’s true either way.

Sivakumar Palaniappan | www.sivaspeaks.com | siva@sivaspeaks.com

 SPEAKHOUR - Communication and Speaking Course
(Sivakumar Palaniappan)
Active Listening:
Active Listening is the process in which you make conscious efforts to hear not only the words
spoken, but also the deeper feelings and thoughts behind what is spoken. Active listening is the
foundation of effective communication. It solves problems and resolves conflicts. It builds
relationships and careers.

‘Actively listening’ can be defined as giving your complete, intentional focus to what someone says,
rather than what their words literally mean. Peter Drucker, the highly successful management
consultant and author, once said that “The most important thing in communication is hearing what
isn’t said.”

The focused listening will enrich your workplace relationships, improve group productivity, and even
boost your mood. While it’s inevitable for conflict to arise from communication, you can turn
misunderstandings into positive action with ‘active listening’.

Be a better listener. Listen without judgment. You'll be a better communicator by being a better
listener, because you will become more effective and conscious communicator.

8 Ways you can build Empathy and Listening Skills:

1. Have a genuine interest on people
Maya Angelou once said, "I
2. Understand the emotions and feelings of others think we all have empathy.
3. Listen attentively with utmost sincerity We may not have enough
4. Stop judging as you listen courage to display it."

5. Don’t interrupt when someone is talking

6. Use positive body language while listening Knowing when not to speak,
is one of the most valuable
7. Ask open ended questions
speaking skills you can learn.
8. Don’t give free advice

Action Item:
Look for opportunities to practice empathy and listening. Try
out all the 8 action items in your interactions today.
Be Empathetic and a Genuine Listener.

Sivakumar Palaniappan | www.sivaspeaks.com | siva@sivaspeaks.com