II.

BRIEF REVIEW OF LITERATURE

This chapter contains the conceptual and research literature. In order to

develop new methods and procedures, careful review of literatures and studies are

conducted for the development of the study.

CONCEPTUAL LITERATURE

The researchers have gathered data from books which were found to be

related to the present study. The following are some related concepts that will

provide additional information regarding the problem posted in the present study.

There are factors that can make a relationship strong. According to Bhatia,

there are factors that affect married life longevity such as “too many.

secrets can spell trouble”. Keeping secrets can ruin trust that couples once shared.

Always remember that even the smallest secrets close off a part of heart. Being

dishonest creates distance but being honest would keep a married life strong.

Secondly, “jealousy is a tough disease”, jealousy is like a phobia, once you feel it, it

is hard to let go of that feeling. The only thing that a couple must do is to have an

open communication and to trust the partner, through that they can have the

solutions on their problems and issues. Lastly, “lack of communication: the supreme

enemy of relationships”, communication keeps relationship strong and healthy. Lack

of communication can lead to misunderstanding and when communication fades

already the love goes into thin air. Meaning communicating is one of the most

important things to do when it comes to married life.

According to Seminoff (2014) in book entitled Build a Happy Marriage: 99 Tips

from an Architect, building a satisfying, beautiful, mutually enriching, and long-lasting

marriage is possible. Married couple must learn to forgive. There is no perfect

human, the persons involved in married relationship will make mistakes and some of
those mistakes may hurt the feeling of one another. But on the other hand, learning

to forgive the husband/wife is very important for every married couple, after forgiving

each other, acknowledge it and then move on.

Secondly, ask for forgiveness, when there is something wrong, simply pause,

humble each self, and then ask for forgiveness. Getting defensive won’t help the

situation. Remember, human commit mistakes and forgiveness brings healing.

The most important ingredient of a happy relationship is forgiveness,

one must know how to give and receive forgiveness. It will lead to a strong married

relationship.

Another thing is love is really a decision; it is an act of will. Being decided to

love each other is the concrete foundation during tough times, also being decided to

love means loving in good and bad times. Set aside the selfishness, be an individual,

but never at the expense of marriage.

Spirit of love between a man and woman is a secret of having a strong

bonded relationship; it is a foundation of a strong and long-lasting relationship.

Promises between the married couple must be maintain and must always be

their basis on having a good relationship. It may also be a good way to avoid

misunderstanding with regards to their relationship.

However, never forget the vows; keep those words. Just like what is.

mentioned earlier, married couples must learn to forgive, in addition for that, also

allow each other to change, world changes and people change. There is always

room for changes and especially for improvements, as time passed by, married

couples will discover more things about each other and that will be the way for them

to change for better. Be valuable, the husband or wife is the most valuable thing is
this world. Treat them special, never allow being taken for granted and do not make

each other a commonplace.

Lastly, live life gracefully, there will be good and bad days during a

relationship as a married couple, but despite of those days learns to live life together

gracefully. Always find things to be grateful every day. Living life fully and beautifully

means married couples enjoy present days and they know that tomorrow is another

wonderful day.

Knowing the duties and responsibilities of a married couple is very. important.

As stated by Steele, there are a lot of responsibilities a wedded couple must know,

some of those are every husband and wife should love.each other and even

themselves. Respect each other is also a responsibility for them. The husband’s duty

is to always love his wife, and himself. The wife also has her responsibility, and it is

to respect his husband and her position as his wife. Respecting includes loving and

pleasing.

In addition, Fox (2015) indicated that happiness is the union of husband and

wife that which none greater or more lasting exist in all of nature. She also stressed

that marriage promotes good mental health to the way there is a less stress and

companionship will be built. Marriage also brings out the best of an individual; the

persons involved in a relationship will grow together in patience, understanding,

unselfishness and perseverance.

One more thing and the most important thing is marriage is the best

environment for raising children because it makes its marks to the next generation.
 Meanwhile, Fox also pointed out that marriage is not a fad, it is a life.

Married is a decision for a lifetime. A person should not make decisions especially in

terms of marriage just for temporary happiness. To enjoy a good marriage means

work, it is letting go of personal desires to please each other. It also means

commitment, you cannot run away when life together becomes boring, tough times

are normal in a married couple, fighting those days means that the persons involve

really love each other.

On the other hand, Baig (2012), stated that building a happy marriage is being

truthful, caring and having mutual respect. Truth is to express feelings as they are,

care is treating with concern and respect is acknowledging the value of the trust

given by each other. The book also other. Stated that through effort, time, and

energy a marriage works. Baig also indicates the different responsibilities of a

spouse, the woman’s responsibilities are taking care of the home’s beauty and

focusing on the upbringing of the children. On the other hand, the husband also has

responsibility on the house, to take care of the garden, to work for the family and

taking care of the children. Children is a huge aspect for a marriage to the way that

when the couple share the work in bringing up the children with good manners,

values, and attitudes, they can make relationships stronger. Similarly, one of the

struggles that relationship faces is fighting and it

is normal for a married couple. Fighting is healthy in depends on what it means. If

the fight’s purpose is to get the better of each other in an argument and it uses all the

kinds of means, then it is not healthy at all. On the other hand, if it means arguing as

a friendly fencing match between equal intellects that leads to good feeling, then it is

healthy. Moreover, showing disrespect, cheating, and lying are also the things that

can make a marriage worst according to Baig.

 In this study, it has been said that married life is a decision between two

persons which requires a commitment between each other’s company. It is also a

promise that married couples must fulfil their need all throughout their life. Despite of

many problems, they will hold on to their promises and they will conquer the

challenges together.

https://www.tumblr.com/mohammedwaly/76646714753/love-and-well-being-

reiss-wheel-theory-of-love

https://www.researchgate.net/publication/314942565_Wheel_Theory_of_Love