UTS 101
UNDERSTANDING THE SELF
LESSONS 5, 6, 7
Transcripted by: Nica Santiago
LESSON 5: Eastern vs Western View of the Self
(w/Spiritual Self)
I. Eastern Vs Western Perspective
Eastern Perspective
• Sees the other person as part of yourself
as well as the things you may create, a drama in
which everyone is interconnected with their specific
roles.
• Ex.: Asians in general talk about their social roles
and would rather keep a low profile as promoting
the self can be seen as boastfulness that disrupts
social relationships
Western Perspective
• focus is always looking toward the self
• looks at the world in dualities wherein you are
distinct from other person, the creator is separate
from the object he created, in which the self is
distinguished and acknowledged
• Ex.: Americans talk more about their personal
attributes when describing themselves and highlight
their personal achievement.
Asian Culture Vs Western Culture
Asian Culture
• collectivist culture as the group and social
relations that is given more importance than
individual needs and wants
• look after the welfare of their groups and values
cooperation
• tends to be more compromising and go around
the bush in explaining things, hoping that the other
person would “feel” what they really want to say
• put more emphasis on hierarchy as the culture
wants to keep things in harmony and order
Western Culture
• individualistic culture since their focus is on the
person
• more likely to be straightforward and forceful in
making their communications as well as
decision-making
• because everyone is on their own competition,
one can say that they also promote ideals that
create “fair” competition and protect the individual
Eastern Vs Western Views
A. Eastern Views
– perspectives which originates from Asia,
specifically in the Eastern part such as China,
Japan, and Korea
Eastern Religions and Philosophies
1. Buddhism
2. Confucianism
3. Taoism
1. Buddhism
• Founder: Sidhartha Gautama (624–560 BC)
• Self is seen as an illusion
• Born out of ignorance, of trying to hold and
control things, or human-centered needs,
• Thus, self is also the source of all these
sufferings
• Our quest is to forget about the self,
• Forget the cravings of the self,
• Break the attachments you have with the
world,
• To renounce the self which is the cause of
all suffering, and in doing so, attain the state
of Nirvana
• Nirvana - the eternal peace and ending of
suffering
• Karma - theory of cause and effect, of action and
reaction
2. Confucianism
• Founder: Kong Fuzi (Confucius) (551–479 BC)
• Can be seen as the code of ethical conduct
• how one should properly act according to
their relationship with other people;
• thus, it is also focused on having a
harmonious social life
• The identity and self-concept of the individual are
interwoven with the identity and status of one’s
community/culture, sharing its pride as well as its
failures
• self-cultivation - seen as the ultimate purpose of
life
• chun-tzu - a man of virtue or noble character
• The cultivated self in Confucianism is what some
scholars call a “subdued self”, wherein personal
needs are repressed (subdued) for the good of
many
• This makes Confuciam society also hierarchical
for the purpose of maintaining order and balance in
society
3. Taoism
• Living in the way of the Tao or the universe.
• Rejects having one definition of what the Tao is,
and one can only state clues of what is as they
adopt a free-flowing, relative, unitary, as well as
paradoxical view of almost everything
• Rejects the hierarchy and strictness brought by
Confucianism and would prefer a simple lifestyle
and its teachings thus aim to describe how to attain
that life
• The self is not just an extension of the family or
the community; it is part of the universe.
• The ideal self is selflessness but this is not
forgetting about the self;
• it is living a balanced life with society and
nature,
• being open and accepting change,
• forgetting about prejudices and egocentric
ideas and thinking about equality as well as
complementarity among humans as well as
other beings.
B. Western Views
Western Religions and Philosophies
• These are beliefs about human nature that
originates and flourish to the Western parts of the
world including the Mediterranean, Middle East and
European continent.
• Such as Ancient Greek Perspectives,
Judeo-Christian Perspectives, Western Materialism
Prejudice
– A hostile or negative attitude toward people in a
distinguishable group based solely on their
membership in that group; it contains cognitive,
emotional, and behavioral components.
• Attitudes are made up of three components:
• cognitive component - involves the
beliefs or thoughts (cognitions) that make
up the attitude
• affective or emotional component -
represents both the type of emotion linked
with the attitude (e.g., anger, warmth) and
the intensity of the emotion (e.g., mild
uneasiness, outright hostility)
• behavioral component - one’s actions
• People don’t only hold attitudes; they usually act
on them as well.
What is Prejudice?
Prejudice
- can be conscious or unconscious and involves
stereotypes, prejudgments, and beliefs (usually
negative) about a group of people.
- these beliefs can be based on race, gender,
religion, culture, disability, sexuality, etc
Stereotype
– A generalization about a group of
people in which certain traits are assigned to
virtually all members of the group, regardless of
actual variation among the members
Discrimination
– unjustified negative or harmful action
toward a member of a group solely
because of his or her membership in
that group
• Prejudice often leads to discrimination.
→ Ex. Racial Discrimination
II. The Spiritual Self
A. Spirituality Vs Religiosity
1. Spirituality
• Spirituality - a general concept pertaining to a
person's quest for meaning in life
• most intimate, inner subjective part of the self
• the ability to use moral sensibility and conscious
may be seen through the expression of religion, its
beliefs and practices
2. Religiosity
• Religion - is a set of beliefs or practices on how
to search for meaning, usually based upon a deity
• Religiosity - is the extent to which an individual
believes, follows, and practices a religion or a
doctrine
Both spirituality and religiosity have a role in
our mental health.
• In a study by Yonker, Schnabelrauch, and
DeHaan (2012), they examined 66,273 adults and
adolescents in their meta-analysis, and concluded
that both spirituality and religiosity have positive
effects on an adolescent’s behavior, well-being,
self-esteem, and personality traits such as
conscientiousness, agreeableness, and openness.
B. Some World Religious Beliefs and Practices
Religious beliefs, rituals, practices, and
customs are all part of the expression of
spiritual self.
1. Buddhism
Beliefs
• believes that life is not a bed of roses, there are
suffering, pain and frustrations
• when people suffer, the want to experience the
goodness of life and avoid disappointments****
• the reactive cycle of wanting and hating can be
broken through acquiring more wisdom and deeper
understanding and acceptance of things as they
are
• buddhists believe in non-violence principle
Customs & Practices
• meditation
a. samatha - practiced as mindfulness of
reading and development of loving-kindness
b. vipassana - aim at developing insight into
reality
• acquiring wisdom is by studying buddhist
teaching, the “Dharma”
2. Christianity
Beliefs
• man is created in God's image (Genesis 1:26)
• eternal life after death will be achieved through
faith in Jesus Christ
• Holy Bible - old testament and new testament
• Jesus Christ’s teachings of an unconditional love
is expressed in loving the poor, oppressed and
outcast in the society
Customs and Practices
• sacrament of baptism - symbolizes the birth in
the christian world
• sacrament of communion - an act of
remembrance of Jesus Christ’s sacrificial love
• resurrection sunday (Easter) - celebrates the
resurrection of Jesus Christ from death
3. Hinduism
Beliefs
• Hindus believe that existence is a cycle of birth,
death and rebirth, governed by Karma
• Karma - concept where the reincarnated life will
depend on how the past life was spent
• Vedas - sacred scriptures of Hindus
Customs & Practices:
• Diwali - festival of lights
• Navratri - festival of nine nights which celebrate
triumph of good over evil
• Hindus have set dates to honor particular
manifestations of god.
4. Islam
Beliefs:
• Muslims believe in Allah, who is their “One God”
• Islam - means “willing submission to God”
• Quran - Holy Book of Islam; taught to be recited
in Arabic because any translation is seen as
inadequate .
Customs & Practices:
• Salat - the prayer that is practiced 5 times a day
• Sawm - the fasting
• Ramadan - is the ninth month of the Islamic Lunar
calendar
• Eidul-Fitr - celebration at the end of Ramadan
• Eidul-Adha - celebrated within completion of the
Pilgrimage, the Hajj (yearly pilgrimage to Mecca)
5. Judaism
Beliefs:
• Jews believe in the God of Abraham.
• Jews believe in the coming of the Messiah, the
Savior.
• Torah - the Law–sacred scripture of the Jews;
guide of the Jewish living
Customs & Practices:
• Rosh Hashanah - the New Year
• Pesach - Passover
• Shavuot - Pentecost
• Sukkot-Tabernacles - Jewish Sabbath begins
on Friday evening at sunset and is an important
time when families gather for the Shabbat meal
III. Finding and Creating Meaning of Life
Dr. Viktor E. Frankl
• Father of Logotherapy and published a book
about “logotherapy”
• assigned in Vienna Hospital suicide ward
• survivor of holocaust
Logotherapy
• a psychotherapy which believes that “man’s
primary motivational force is search for meaning”
• aids individuals to find personal meaning of life,
whatever life situation they may be
Basic Concepts
• Life has meaning under all circumstances
• Main motivation for living is our will to find
meaning in life
• Freedom to find meaning
Frankl’s Source of Meaning
Purposeful work
• To find the meaning of life starts with holding a
future goal
Courage in the face of difficulty
• To find meaning of life is to recognize suffering,
pain, and death as part of life and to have the
courage to face these difficulties
Love
• The ultimate factor to find the meaning of life is
love
• Dr. Frankl's wife, parents, and some relatives
were victims of gas chambers. His love for his wife
kept him fighting for his life .
“No one can become fully aware of the very
essence of another human being unless he loves
him. By his love he is enabled to see the essential
traits and features in the beloved person; and even
more, he sees that which is potential in him, which
is not yet actualized but yet ought to be actualized.”
LESSON 6: The Physical Self
The Physical Self

• Physical Self is all about appearance.
• Across cultures, the definitions of what makes
someone physically attractive varies.
• In some communities, certain practices have been
established to appear more attractive to the
opposite sex.
I. The State of Beauty Standards in the
Philippines
• In the Philippines, certain beauty standards have
been shaped by various factors such as
colonization, globalization, and media influences.
A. Colonization - beauty ideals in the Philippines
are deeply rooted in the country’s colonial past, like
Western standards (prioritize lightness of skin, a tall
stature, and a pointy nose as markers of
attractiveness)
B. Globalization - Widespread access to the
internet and social media have further exposed
Filipinos to Western beauty standards, leading
many to desire features such as a sharp nose,
thinner lips, and smaller jawlines.
• These standards of beauty often carry
societal implications, as they are associated
with attractiveness, greater wealth, and
higher intelligence.
• Conversely, these standards can create a
sense of inadequacy and perpetuate
discrimination against those who do not
conform to them.
C. Media influence - often promote the use of skin-
lightening products and feature celebrities with
Caucasian-looking complexions.
• The pressure to fit into certain beauty
standards can have negative effects on
one’s self-esteem and mental health,
especially for those who do not fit the
prevailing beauty ideals.
• The perpetuation of certain beauty
standards can also contribute to
discrimination and inequality, as those who
do not meet these ideals may face
exclusion or marginalization in various
aspects of society.
• Philippine beauty standards have evolved
due to various cultural, historical, and global
factors.
It is important to continue promoting acceptance
and celebration of all types of beauty.
• This can be achieved through media
representation that reflects the diverse
beauty of Filipinos and encourages self-love
and acceptance.
• Education and awareness-raising efforts
can also help combat the harmful effects of
unrealistic beauty standards.
II. Self-Esteem and Body Image
A. Self-Esteem - refers to a person’s beliefs about
his/her own worth and value; it is often associated
with one’s self-confidence.
B. Body Image - the way one sees the physical
self and the thoughts and feelings that result from
that perception.
William H. Sheldon - introduced the concept of
body types, or somatotypes, in the 1940s. People
are born with an inherited body type based on
skeletal frame and body composition. Most people
are unique combinations of the three body types:
ectomorph, mesomorph, and endomorph.
LESSON 7: The Sexual Self
I. Why do we need sex education?
• HIV remains a major global public health issue,
having claimed 40.4 million [32.9–51.3 million] lives
so far with ongoing transmission in all countries
globally; with some countries reporting increasing
trends in new infections when previously on the
decline.
• In 2022, 630 000 [480 000–880 000] people died
from HIV-related causes and 1.3 million [1.0–1.7
million] people acquired HIV.
• Sex is still a taboo in the Philippines. It is not
normally talked about in schools and houses, which
leads to unawareness and misinformation.
• Because of these, young Filipinos are at-risk of
unsafe sex practices.
• Obviously, this is because of the lack of
comprehensive sex education programs.
• An adolescent brain is naturally impulsive. One
way or another, they will find ways to experience
their curiosity.
• Because of this, it is better to openly and calmly
educate them about what is safe and unsafe, rather
than punishing them and repressing their desires.
• Punishment does not change behavior. It only
suppresses it temporarily. Bottom-line: they need
guidance!
II. The Sexual Self
• Humans are born as either male or female.
• If an egg is fertilized with a sperm carrying
the X-chromosome, the gonads should
develop into ovaries and the offspring will
be female.
• If an egg is fertilized with a sperm carrying
the Y-chromosome, the gonads should
develop into testes and the offspring will be
male.
• Gonads - reproductive glands that produce the
gametes; testis or ovary
Gender Identity:
• Cisgender: a person whose biological sex
corresponds with their gender identity
• Transgender: a person whose biological sex
does not correspond with their gender identity
III. Puberty & Secondary Sex Characteristics
Puberty
• Stage in human development when the
reproductive organs fully mature and become
functional and perform their reproductive
capabilities.
• Rising levels of gonadal hormones (testosterone
in males; estrogen in females)
• Generally, between 10-15 y.o.
Secondary Sex Characteristics
• features that develop during puberty
The changes that occur during puberty are similar
in sequence in all individuals but the age which
they occur differs among individuals.
In males,
• As they reach the age of 13, puberty is
characterized by the increase in the size of
reproductive organs followed by the appearance of
hair in the pubic area, axillary, and face.
In females,
• the budding of their breasts usually occurring at
the age of 11 signals their puberty.
• Hormones play an important role in the regulation
of ovulation and fertility of females.
• Menarche - first menstrual period of females
which happens two years after the start of puberty.
Secondary Sex Characteristics
Male Female
More pronounced body hair Less pronounced body hair
Muscular pectorals Rounded features
Narrow hips More pronounced breasts
Deeper voice Wider hips
Less fat tissue overall More fat tissue overall
Erogenous Zone
• refers to parts of the body that are primarily
receptive and increase sexual arousal when
touched in a sexual manner
• It may vary from one person to another
• Mouth, breasts, genitals, anus
IV. Human Sexual Behavior
Human Sexual Behavior
– any activity, solitary, between two persons that
induces sexual arousal
Two major factors that determine human sexual
behavior:
• Inherited sexual response patterns that have
evolved as a means of ensuring reproduction and
that become part of each individual’s genetic
inheritance
• The degree of restraint or other types of
influence exerted on the individual by society in
the expression of his sexuality.
Nervous System Factors
• The hypothalamus and the limbic system are
the parts of the brain believed to be responsible for
regulating the sexual response, but there is no
specialized “sex” center that has been located in
the human brain.
Sexual intercourse
– also called as coitus or copulation
– is any activity involving the sexual organs
primarily for the function of bodily pleasure and/or
reproduction.
– primarily involves penetration of the penis into the
vagina; however, it may also pertain to
non-penetrative sexual activities which may be
sometimes called ‘outercourse’
Sexually Transmitted Disease (STD)
• Infections transmitted from an infected person to
an uninfected person through sexual contact
• Can lead to long-term health problems, usually in
women and infants
• It can be caused by bacteria, viruses, or parasites.
• Examples:
• Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV) -
attacks the immune system
• Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome
(AIDS) - occurs in the advanced stage of
HIV infection
• The virus may be transmitted via body fluids such
as blood, semen, vaginal fluids, and breast milk.
Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV)
– a virus that destroys the body’s white blood cells,
specifically called T-cells, which is the body’s
primary defense system against diseases
• When left unmanaged, the person will undergo
the ‘final stage’ called acquired immunodeficiency
syndrome (AIDS)
HIV Transmission
• HIV can be transmitted via the exchange of a
variety of body fluids from people living with HIV,
such as blood, breast milk, semen and vaginal
secretions.
• HIV can also be transmitted during pregnancy and
delivery to the child
• People cannot become infected through ordinary
day-to-day contact such as kissing, hugging,
shaking hands, or sharing personal objects, food or
water.
Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome (AIDS)
– this happens when the immune system fails,
leaving the person significantly more prone to
diseases such as tuberculosis and pneumonia.
• Not everyone with HIV develops AIDS. As long as
the person detects and manages the virus early on,
it’s possible to manage HIV with antiretroviral
therapy and live with the virus for many years.
Risk Factors
• Behaviors and conditions that put people at
greater risk of contracting HIV include:
• having unprotected sex;
• having another sexually transmitted
infection (STI) such as syphilis, herpes.
• engaging in harmful use of alcohol and
drugs in the context of sexual behaviour;
• sharing contaminated needles, syringes
and other injecting equipment and drug
solutions when injecting drugs;
 • receiving unsafe injections, blood
transfusions and tissue transplantation, and
medical procedures that involve unsterile
cutting or piercing; and
• experiencing accidental needle stick
injuries, including among health workers.
Treatment
• There is no cure for HIV infection. It is treated with
antiretroviral drugs, which stop the virus from
replicating in the body.
• Current antiretroviral therapy (ART) does not
cure HIV infection but allows a person’s immune
system to get stronger. This helps them to fight
other
infections.
• Currently, ART must be taken every day for the
rest of a person’s life.
HIV Prevention
• Use condoms.
• Tell your partner about your sexual history.
Communication should always be a key for
relationships involving sex.
• Avoid any high-risk behavior.
• Consider abstinence if you are not completely
ready
• Sex should always be a wonderful experience
between two people. IT SHOULD NEVER BE
FORCED.
• Besides condoms, the most important thing in
sexual intercourse is CONSENT!
Natural & Artificial Methods of Contraception
1. Natural Method
• Natural family planning methods that do not
involve any chemical or foreign body introduction
into the human body.
• Abstinence – refraining from sexual
intercourse
• Calendar Method (rhythm method) –
withholding sexual activity during the days
that the woman is fertile. According to the
menstrual cycle, the woman is likely to
conceive 3-4 days before and 3-4 days after
ovulation.
2. Artificial Methods
• Oral contraceptives – aka pills
• Condoms
• Surgical Methods – vasectomy, tubal ligation
V. What is LOVE?
• Love actually has biological mechanisms.
Neurotransmitters - chemicals in our nerve cells
are active when we are in love.
Three Basic Categories Or “Stages” of
Romantic Love
• According to a team of scientists led by Dr. Helen
Fisher at Rutgers, romantic love can be broken
down into three categories: lust, attraction, and
attachment.
• Though there are overlaps and subtleties to each,
each type is characterized by its own set of
hormones.
• Testosterone and estrogen drive lust;
• dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin
create attraction;
• and oxytocin and vasopressin mediate
attachment.
1. Lust
– Sex drive
• Driven by the desire for sexual gratification.
• The hypothalamus of the brain plays a big role in
this, stimulating the production of the sex hormones
testosterone and estrogen from the testes and
ovaries
• As it turns out, testosterone increases libido in just
about everyone. The effects are less pronounced
with estrogen, but some women report being more
sexually motivated around the time they ovulate,
when estrogen levels are highest.
2. Attraction
– Romantic Love
• Love is its Own Reward
• Attraction involves the brain pathways that control
“reward” behavior which partly explains why the
first few weeks or months of a relationship can be
so exhilarating and even all-consuming
• the three neurotransmitters: dopamine,
norepinephrine, and serotonin create attraction
a. Norepinephrine
– these chemicals make us giddy, energetic, and
euphoric, even leading to decreased appetite and
insomnia – which means you actually can be so “in
love” that you can’t eat and can’t sleep
• also known as noradrenalin, plays a large role in
the fight or flight response, which kicks into high
gear when we’re stressed and keeps us alert.
• The initial stages of falling for someone activates
your stress response, increasing your blood levels
of adrenaline and cortisol.
b. Dopamine
– The pathway to pleasure
• Most notably involved in helping us feel pleasure
as part of the brain’s reward system
• This chemical stimulates ‘desire and reward’ by
triggering an intense rush of pleasure.
The darker side of dopamine is the intense feeling
of reward people feel when they take drugs, such
as heroin or cocaine, which can lead to addiction.
Because dopamine motivates us to seek out things
that we find rewarding, it plays a main role in
attraction and finding romantic partners.
• Studies show that when people view pictures of
their romantic partners, multiple areas of the brain
are flooded with dopamine, triggering those
euphoric feelings.
When you're around someone you have strong
romantic feelings for, you may notice your pulse
quickens, your breathing gets shallow, or your
cheeks flush. These are all biological processes
that are partially caused by increased levels of
dopamine.
c. Serotonin
– The natural mood booster
• When you feel happy and all seems right with the
world, you’re feeling the effects of serotonin. This is
responsible for boosting mood.
• People who suffer from obsessive-compulsive
disorder also have low levels of serotonin, leading
scientists to speculate that this is what underlies
the overpowering infatuation that characterizes the
beginning stages of love.
3. Attachment
– Long-term love
• It is the predominant factor in long-term
relationships.
• While lust and attraction are pretty much exclusive
to romantic entanglements, attachment mediates
friendships, parent- infant bonding, social cordiality,
and many other intimacies as well.
• The two primary hormones here appear to be
oxytocin and vasopressin
a. Oxytocin
– The love and cuddle hormone
• Help us bond with loved ones and can be
released through touch, music, and exercise.
• Produced by the hypothalamus and released in
large quantities during sex, breastfeeding, and
childbirth.
• Our bodies also produce oxytocin when we're
excited by our sexual partner, and when we fall in
love.
Vasopressin
- antidiuretic hormone (ADH)
• The second hormone involved in the phase of
attachment is one that is released in large
quantities directly after having sex.
• Stimulates feelings of happiness, encouraging you
to want to stay with that person as a result.
• Experts believe that vasopressin plays a role in
social interactions between humans and
encourages pair-bonding (monogamous, long-term
relationships).
Lust and attraction shut off the prefrontal
cortex of the brain, which includes rational
behaviors.
Setting Realistic Expectations
• Understanding the science of lust, attraction, and
attachment can help you develop more realistic
expectations of your relationships.
• The following are some tips to guide you through
the stages of love:
1. Don’t mistake lust for love - give a new
relationship time before you start dreaming of a
future together.
2. Keep the dopamine flowing in a long-term
relationship by having date nights, studying your
lessons, or going on trips in which you do novel and
exciting things together.
3. Keep the oxytocin flowing by writing cards and or
sending text messages, think of your partner
when she's not around, share your hopes and
dreams, and support those of your partner.
4. If you’re the jealous, controlling type, start
developing your own activities and friendships that
make you feel important and cared about.
VI. But what really is love?
A. Rollo May
– love is a feeling of delight in the presence of
another person
– Identified four kinds of love in Western
tradition—sex, eros, philia, and agape
May’s Forms of Love
1. Sex - a physiological need that seeks
gratification through the release of tension
2. Eros - a psychological desire that seeks
procreation or creation through an enduring union
with a loved one (built on care and tenderness)
3. Philia - an intimate nonsexual friendship
between two people
– Philia cannot be rushed; it takes time to grow, to
develop, to sink its roots
– friendship in the simplest, most direct term
4. Agape - altruistic love that requires nothing in
return
– It is a kind of spiritual love; the love of God for
man
– It is undeserved and unconditional
B. Erich Fromm
– Love is not a feeling. It is a decision. It is a
judgment.
In love the paradox occurs that two people
become one yet remain two.
Fromm defined love as a “union with somebody, or
something outside oneself under the condition of
retaining the separateness and integrity of one’s
own self ” (Fromm, 1981, p. 3).
Love involves sharing and communion with
another, yet it allows a person the freedom to be
unique and separate.
It enables a person to satisfy the need for
relatedness without surrendering integrity and
independence.
VII. The Art of Loving
• In The Art of Loving, Fromm (1956) identified four
basic elements common to all forms of genuine
love: care, responsibility, respect, and
knowledge.

1. Care - someone who loves another person must

care for that person and be willing to take care of
him or her

2. Responsibility - a willingness and ability to

respond

3. Respect - a person who loves others responds

to their physical and psychological needs, respects
them for who they are, and avoids the temptation of
trying to change them. But people can respect
others only if they have knowledge of them
VIII. The Science of Love

4. Knowledge - to know others means to see them

Dr. Arthur Aron - discusses the science of love,
from their own point of view
the research on human biological and
psychological processes involved in love
Thus, care, responsibility, respect, and knowledge
relationships.
are all entwined in a loving relationship.
• In the nearly 50 years that Arthur and his wife,
C. Robert Stenberg
psychologist Elaine Aron have studied love, they
have developed 36 questions to create closeness.
Robert Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love
• Part of falling in love is feeling a connection.

Sternberg stated that love has three requirements:

• Answering 36 questions that gradually get more
1. Passion
and more personal that both people answer make
2. Intimacy
them closer
3. Commitment
• These 36 questions get people closer. That can
facilitate falling in love.
• Love relationships vary depending on the
presence or absence of each of these components.
“When you're in a close relationship with someone,
they become part of who you are. Just like when a
1. Passion - intense, physical attraction partner
mother has her child injured, she feels it physically.
feel toward one another
This is true in all close relationships.”
– Dr. Arthur Aron
2. Intimacy - ability to share feelings, personal
thoughts and psychological closeness with the
other

3. Commitment - conscious decision to stay

together