Theme for February: Love in marriage and relationships

Pilot text: Genesis 2:18, 22 & 23

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The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for
him.”
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Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought
her to the man.
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The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called
‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.”

Recap:
Introduction – Love in marriages and relationship.

 God is love – I John 4:8

 Relationship is the way two or more persons are connected.
 Relationships are investments that we will all reap the dividends one day.
 What you sow in your relationship will determine your harvest form it will be.
 If you cannot love in marriage, you will find it difficult to love in any other relationship.
 Always stay positive in any relationship you find yourself.

Prayer meeting: led by Pastor Wunmi Ojo

Resolving conflict in marriage and relationship – Unity in our home

 Sow the seed of prayer and love into the life of your husband, wife and children.
 Unity – a state of oneness, being one of undivided entity.
 Unity in marriage is to be one mind and purpose in marriage.
 How to restore a broken relationship:
o Pray for God’s intervention for yourself and the other person.
o Ask for wisdom from God
o Put yourself in the other person’s position. It gives you the capacity of
empathy/sympathy.
 Accept your part of the conflict
 Separate the person from the issue
 Deal with conflict early
 Treat conflict from the root.
 Conflict should be DOA in a Christian home.

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Title: Upholding Love in our homes.

Aim: To remind us of the importance of love in our relationships and ways to uphold love in our
home.

Text: I Corinthians 13:4-8

I Corinthians 13:4-8 (NIV)

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Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous, it does not brag, and it is not proud.
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Love is not rude, is not selfish, and does not get upset with others. Love does not count up
wrongs that have been done.
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Love takes no pleasure in evil but rejoices over the truth.
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Love patiently accepts all things. It always trusts, always hopes, and always endures.
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Love never ends. There are gifts of prophecy, but they will be ended. There are gifts of
speaking in different languages, but those gifts will stop. There is the gift of knowledge, but it
will come to an end.

Preamble:

 Our shining and impacting in 2024 should start from our family unit.
 When we can shine conveniently and effectively within our homes, it will be easy to
shine and impact effectively outside our homes.
 The home is the breeding and grooming ground for future giants and rulers.

Relationships can be diverse and broad - colleagues at home, business partners, siblings, in-laws,
contemporaries, friends etc. For the context of this study, we will see relationship within the
family set-up, i.e. the Home. The family comprise of children (who are siblings), wife, husband,
and the (in-laws???).

In a family relationship but for the husband and wife, you cannot choose your child(ren), father,
mother, and siblings. Family love is therefore a very special kind of LOVE.

A. Definition of terms – Home and Love

What is a Home?

If one looks in a dictionary the answer would come out to be, “The place where one lives
permanently, especially as a member of a family or household.”

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But rather, I will say:

o The HOME is a place of refuge and comfort. It is a place of happiness and

laughter. It is a place where hugs abound, and peace reigns.
o Love makes the house a home. One of the key and fundamental virtues for a
fruitful and successful home in LOVE.
o Without love, the home is just housing.

Discussion I:

What is LOVE in the context of family relationships?

i. “Family” Love is the bond characterized by affection, respect, loyalty and healthy
attachment. It is a different kind of love.
ii. “Family” Love is trusting and be trustable in the Home. Being faithful to your promises
and being true to your word.
iii. “Family” Love is selfless, unconditionally commitment, enabling forgiveness, respect,
and service.

B. Characteristics of Family Love (Love within the family)

 Real and heartfelt (sincere in every of it dealing with family members) – Rom. 12:9

Romans 12:9

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Your love must be real. Hate what is evil and hold on to what is good.

 Unpretentious (not attempting to impress or oppress others with an appearance of

greater importance. Love does not brag, does not boast) – I Cor. 13:4b

I Cor. 13:4b

…………… Love is not jealous, it does not brag, and it is not proud.

 Neither selfish nor greedy – I Cor. 13:5a

I Cor. 13:5a

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It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking ……………

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  Honours the other party dearly– Romans 12:10 (Amp)

Romans 12:10 (amp)

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Be devoted to one another with [authentic] brotherly affection [as members of one
family], give preference to one another in honor;

 Highly hospitable - Rom. 12:13b (NIV)

Romans 12:13 (KJV)

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Distributing to the necessity of saints; given to hospitality.

 Trust – I Cor. 13:7 (NCV)

I Cor. 13:7 (NCV)

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Love patiently accepts all things. It always trusts, always hopes, and always endures.

 Patient and Kind – I Cor. 13:4a

I Cor. 13:4a

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Love is patient and kind …………………………

 Cast out fear (True love eliminates fear, anxieties and insecurities that torment one’s
heart, mind, and soul) – I John 4:18

I John 4:18

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There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with
punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

C. Way to uphold love in our family.

o Keep no record of wrong & do not pay ‘evil’ for ‘evil’ – I Peter 3:9

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I Peter 3:9

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Do not do wrong to repay a wrong, and do not insult to repay an insult. But repay
with a blessing, because you yourselves were called to do this so that you might
receive a blessing.

o Always look at for each other (Family WhatsApp?) – I Peter 3:8

I Peter 3:8

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Finally, all of you should be in agreement, understanding each other, loving each
other as family, being kind and humble.

o Eat and watch TV together (as much as possible) -

o Mutual respect (among siblings and other family members) –
o Talk it off (encourage passionate discussions withing the family, especially
when you notice any brewing disagreement) –
o Share responsibilities (who does what, how and when?) – Acts 6:2-4

Acts 6:2-4

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So the Twelve gathered all the disciples together and said, “It would not be right
for us to neglect the ministry of the word of God in order to wait on tables.
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Brothers and sisters, choose seven men from among you who are known to be
full of the Spirit and wisdom. We will turn this responsibility over to them
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and will give our attention to prayer and the ministry of the word.”

o Learn and imbibe the act of forgiveness and ‘forgetting’ –

Ephesians 4:26-27

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“In your anger do not sin”. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry,
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and do not give the devil a foothold.

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 o Always pray together (this is very important; A family that prays together
stays together) -

When we can uphold love in our families, then we are on the right path to making our homes
fruitful and successfully fulfilling God’s purpose – breeding Kingdom general and role models.

Discussion II

1. Mention one common disagreements in the family – siblings, father and mother. How can
we guard against or handle it?

Conclusion

God is the author of the family and it is the smallest unit of the society. A family that lives in
Love will not struggle to shine and impact. It will be easy for members of such family to fulfil
purpose collectively as a family and individually. A family that lives in Love can easily birth
more peaceful families. We need to be deliberate and intentional about upholding love in our
homes. May God help us. Amen and amen.

Prayers

1. Father Lord, I thank you for my home – children, siblings, in-laws, father, mother, wife,
husband etc. I thank you for these wonderful set of people that have contributed to who I
am and who I have grown to be.
2. Thank you for keeping us together as a family in Love in spite of what we have all passed
through.
3. Dear Lord, help us to be intentional and deliberate about upholding Love in our family.
4. Heavenly Father, let your love continue to bind us as one in deeper love and unity.