WORKBOOK

For
Doing Life With
Your Adult Children
Keep Your Mouth Shut and
the Welcome Mat Out
(A Practical Guide to Implementing Jim
Burns' Book)
This Workbook Is
Owned By
 Copyright © 2023 by BEYOND BOOKS

All Rights Reserved. Please note that reproduction or utilization

of any part of this book without prior notice or written permission
from the publisher is strictly prohibited.

Disclaimer:

This workbook is an independent and UNOFFICIAL publication,

distinct from the original book. It is not associated, authorized,
endorsed, or licensed by the author or publisher of the original
work.
The author and publisher of this book aim to provide assistance
and support by offering this workbook as a complementary
companion to the main book, rather than a substitute. We have
no intention to deceive you but sincerely desire to assist you in
maximizing the benefits of using this workbook alongside the
primary book.

1
 TABLE OF CONTENTS

Relevance Of This Workbook..................................................... 5

Set Your Goal..............................................................................6

Chapter 1: You’re Fired

Chapter Summary....................................................................... 9
Key takeaways............................................................................10
Quizzes.......................................................................................11
Reflective Questions...................................................................12
Affirmations.................................................................................13

Chapter 2: Keep Your Mouth Shut and the Welcome Mat Out
Chapter Summary.......................................................................14
Key takeaways............................................................................15
Quizzes.......................................................................................16
Reflective Questions...................................................................17
Affirmations.................................................................................18

Chapter 3: Why Is It Taking My Kid So Long to Grow Up?

Chapter Summary...................................................................... 19
Key takeaways........................................................................... 20
Quizzes...................................................................................... 21
Reflective Questions.................................................................. 22
Affirmations................................................................................ 23

2
Chapter 4: How to Raise an Entitled Adult Child . . . or Not
Chapter Summary...................................................................... 24
Key takeaways........................................................................... 25
Quizzes...................................................................................... 26
Reflective Questions.................................................................. 27
Affirmations................................................................................ 28

Chapter 5: A Failure to Launch

Chapter Summary...................................................................... 29
Key takeaways........................................................................... 30
Quizzes...................................................................................... 31
Reflective Questions.................................................................. 32
Affirmations................................................................................ 33

Chapter 6: When Your Grown Child Violates Your Values

Chapter Summary...................................................................... 34
Key takeaways........................................................................... 35
Quizzes...................................................................................... 36
Reflective Questions.................................................................. 37
Affirmations................................................................................ 38

Chapter 7: The High Cost of Money

Chapter Summary...................................................................... 39
Key takeaways........................................................................... 40
Quizzes...................................................................................... 41
Reflective Questions.................................................................. 42
Affirmations................................................................................ 43

3
Chapter 8: In-Laws, Stepfamilies, and the Blend
Chapter Summary...................................................................... 44
Key takeaways........................................................................... 45
Quizzes...................................................................................... 46
Reflective Questions.................................................................. 47
Affirmations................................................................................ 48

Chapter 9: It’s Party Time with the Grandkids

Chapter Summary...................................................................... 49
Key takeaways........................................................................... 50
Quizzes...................................................................................... 51
Reflective Questions.................................................................. 52
Affirmations................................................................................ 53

Practical Exercises.................................................................. 54

All Affirmations.........................................................................56

Personal Notes ........................................................................ 58

4
 Relevance Of This Workbook

Tired of guessing your way through this exhilarating yet

sometimes puzzling journey of parenting adult children? Fear
not; we've got your back with this powerful companion workbook!
Uncover the secret sauce to forge unbreakable bonds with your
grown-up kids. Our skillfully prepared chapter summaries and
thought-provoking affirmations will help you handle every twist
and turn.
Prepare to be transformed as you engage in practical exercises
designed to help you reach your full potential as a parent.
Brace yourself for a transformation as you dive into practical
exercises designed to reveal your potential as a parent. Master
the art of balance, giving your children space while offering
unwavering support.
Discover the power of self-care, leaving you stronger and more
resilient to tackle any challenge that comes your way.
And let's not forget the precious memories! This workbook is
your treasure chest for capturing heartwarming moments and
reflections, creating a lasting legacy of love and connection.

5
 Set Your Goal(s)

Before we kick off, what do you hope to achieve at the end of

this workbook and in the course of time?

My Ultimate Goal

I want to achieve (E.g., "I want to achieve a healthier work-life

balance.")

........................................................................................

........................................................................................

........................................................................................

Why is this goal important to me?

My ultimate goal is important to me because (E.g., "My ultimate

goal is important to me because I want to spend more quality
time with my family and improve my overall well-being.")

6
.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

Specific Actions I need to take

To achieve my goal, I will take the following specific actions

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

Potential Obstacles I may face

Some obstacles I may encounter and how I plan to overcome
them

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

My Action Timeline:
I will work towards my goal following this timeline

.......................................................................................................

7
.......................................................................................................

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Measures of Success
I will know I am making progress when

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

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Reward for Achieving my Goal

I will reward myself with

......................................................................................................

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8
 Chapter 1: You’re Fired!

Chapter Summary

Parenting adult children may be an unexpected and difficult

adventure, full of turbulent times. We may not always predict the
changes as our children mature. They want to be treated as
adults but still need our help, and their decisions occasionally
contradict ours. But fear not, dear parents, for there is hope in
this transition!
The passage shares valuable insights and lessons to navigate
this new phase with grace and wisdom. First and foremost, be
encouraging, not intrusive. Let your children know you're there
for them, but give them space to make their own decisions.
Avoid enabling dependency, as it hinders their growth into
responsible adults. As you embrace this change, remember to
care for yourself too. Investing in your emotional, physical, and
spiritual health will make you a better support for your adult
children.
But it's not all serious business! Have fun together and create
joyful experiences. Play and laughter strengthen bonds like no
other. And as you journey through this transition, focus on
leaving a legacy of love and faith. Your attitude, values, and
example will have a profound impact on their lives.

9
 Key Takeaways

1. Be encouraging, not intrusive: Support your adult children

without controlling their choices, earning the right to be heard
by showing care and understanding.
2. Avoid enabling dependency: Help your children become
independent adults by setting boundaries and allowing them
to take responsibility for their decisions.
3. Prioritize self-care: Invest in your emotional, physical, and
spiritual health, so you can be stronger and more supportive
for your adult children.
4. Have fun together: Strengthen your relationship through
shared joyful experiences, laughter, and play.
5. Leave a legacy of love and faith: Your attitude, values, and
example will shape the legacy you pass on to the next
generation, making a lasting impact on their lives.

10
 Quizzes

1. The best way to relate to adult children is to be: a) Intrusive

b) Encouraging c) Strict
2. Enabling dependency means: a) Allowing independence b)
Providing support c) Keeping children dependent
3. What is one of the strongest elements of friendship? a) Fun
b) Trust c) Discipline
4. The ultimate legacy parents leave is one of: a) Material
possessions b) Love and faith c) Discipline
5. Your attitude towards your adult children will impact: a) Their
career b) Their relationships c) Your relationship with them

11
 Reflective Questions

How can I strike a balance between support and independence

for my adult children?

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

What fun experiences can I create to strengthen my bond with

my adult children?

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

12
 End Of Chapter Affirmations

I leave a legacy of love and I will impact the children with this
legacy

I embrace the journey of parenting adult children with grace and

understanding

13
Chapter 2: Keep Your Mouth Shut and the Welcome
Mat Out

Chapter Summary

We've all been through that challenging phase of figuring out

when to offer advice to our grown-up kids and when to zip it,
right? The key lesson here is to be patient and wait for the right
moments to offer our guidance. Unsolicited advice can be a real
relationship killer; our adult children may see it as criticism.
Ouch! It’s best we resist the urge to jump in with our advice,
even when we're absolutely sure we know what's best.
Instead, focus on becoming mentors and coaches, supporting
our kids' decisions, and cheering them on. Treating them as
capable adults creates an atmosphere of respect and trust. And
speaking of words, they carry immense power. So, let's be
mindful of our words' impact – both for good and not-so-good.
Billy Graham's daughter's touching story shows us the value of
grace and unconditional love. Offering forgiveness and support
can be life-changing for our children. Let's be quick to apologize
for our mistakes and shower them with encouragement.
To build a solid relationship, let's practice healthy communication
by asking open-ended questions and really listening. Doing so
creates an adult-to-adult connection that will strengthen our bond
with our kids.

14
 Key Takeaways

1. Timing Matters: As parents of adult children, we must resist

the urge to offer unsolicited advice. Waiting for the right
moments when they seek guidance willingly fosters trust and
respect in the relationship.
2. Words Have Impact: The power of our words cannot be
underestimated. Apologizing for hurtful words and choosing
to speak words of encouragement and blessing can make a
profound difference in our children's lives.
3. Be a Mentor, Not a Controller: Transitioning from a
controlling parent to a supportive mentor is essential. Being
their biggest supporter, showing belief in their capabilities,
and avoiding a lecturing approach will help build an adult-to-
adult relationship.
4. Adopt Healthy Communication: Open-ended questions and
genuine dialogue foster understanding and respect. Talking
with, rather than at, our adult children creates a space for
meaningful conversations.
5. Show Grace and Unconditional Love: Offering grace during
challenging times and providing unconditional love can be
transformative. By doing so, we create a safe and loving
environment for our children to seek guidance and support.

15
 Quizzes

1. The best policy for parents with adult children is to: a) Give
unsolicited advice. b) Offer guidance even when they don't
ask for it. c) Bite their tongues and remain silent.
2. The transition from controlling parenting to mentorship
involves: a) Dictating decisions. b) Becoming their biggest
supporter. c) Treating them like children.
3. Healthy communication with adult children involves: a)
Asking open-ended questions. b) Giving orders. c) Avoiding
any dialogue.
4. The power of words can: a) Have no impact on relationships.
b) Bless or curse. c) Only affect children when they are
young.
5. Showing grace means: a) Being judgmental and critical. b)
Offering unconditional love and forgiveness. c) Withholding
affection.

16
 Reflective Questions

Have you found it challenging to wait for your adult children to

seek your advice willingly? How can you cultivate patience in this
area?

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

Consider a situation in your child's life where they might need

your grace and support. How can you offer it without judgment or
criticism?

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

17
 End Of Chapter Affirmations

My words have power, and I choose to use them to bless and

uplift my children.

As a parent, I embrace my role as a mentor, supporting and

guiding my adult children with wisdom and care

18
 Chapter 3: Why Is It Taking My Kid So Long to
Grow Up?

Chapter Summary

When it comes to adolescence and parenting, It's all about

understanding the quirks and qualities of our emerging adult
kids. They might be exercising their freedom and delaying adult
milestones, but fear not! It's just their unique way of finding
themselves.
About the "cringe factor." Yeah, we all worry about the moral
aimlessness they face, especially when it comes to issues like
pornography and cohabitation. But here's the key: empathy and
open discussions. Meet them on their turf and engage in their
world. Trust me; it makes a world of difference!
An amazing strategy is to keep them excited about faith and
church. Prioritize their involvement and avoid judging or
preaching. Let's be the best neighbors to guide them on their
journey.
Bottom line: embrace the messy middle, understand their
culture, and prioritize love over differences. We've got this,
parents!

19
 Key Takeaways

1. "Adultolescence" is a Real Thing: Our young adults might

take their time embracing full adulthood, but it's a natural
phase called "adultolescence." They'll explore, try different
paths, and that's okay!
2. Understand the Messy Middle: It's all about empathy and
open discussions. Instead of judging, step into their shoes
and see the world from their perspective.
3. Meet Them Where They Are: Engage in their interests and
experiences. Attend concerts or events they love; it's a
fantastic way to connect and show you care.
4. Prioritize Faith and Involvement: Keep them excited about
faith and church by involving them actively. Let them lead
and support their journey with love and encouragement.
5. Navigate Differences with Love: Embrace their culture and
values. Instead of arguing, prioritize love over
disagreements, and maintain a positive relationship through
the ups and downs of adultolescence.

20
 Quizzes

1. What is "adultolescence"? a) A boring stage b) Delayed

adulthood c) A superhero's name
2. What's the key to a harmonious relationship? a) Ignoring
differences b) Empathizing and discussing c) Trying to
change them
3. How can you keep them excited about faith? a) Lecture and
criticize b) Prioritize their involvement c) Avoid talking about
faith
4. What should you do to engage with your adult child? a) Meet
them on their territory b) Force them to your interests c)
Disapprove of their choices
5. What's the secret to navigating the messy middle? a)
Ignoring generational differences b) Understanding their
culture c) Letting them go their own way

21
 Reflective Questions

How do I view my adult child's journey to adulthood?

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

Have I empathized with their choices and culture?

.......................................................................................................

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22
 End Of Chapter Affirmations

I trust God's plan for my child's adultolescence journey.

Walking in faith, I meet them where they are.

23
Chapter 4: How to Raise an Entitled Adult Child . . .
or Not

Chapter Summary

This chapter teaches that expressing clear expectations is the

key to helping our adult children flourish. Just like adding all the
right ingredients to a recipe, communicating openly and honestly
sets the stage for responsible adulthood. But wait, there's more!
We also discover the power of an action plan, like a trusty GPS
guiding our kids from dependence to independence. It's time to
set those deadlines and consequences, creating a roadmap for
success.
As parents, we must avoid enabling our adult children's
irresponsible behavior. Remember, tough love is like a firm
handshake; it shows support while encouraging growth. And
don't forget to create an exit plan, like helping our little birds
leave the nest and soar confidently into the world.

24
 Key Takeaways

1. Express Expectations Clearly: Make your expectations

known, just like serving hot pancakes for breakfast. Clear
communication builds a strong foundation for responsible
adulthood.
2. Develop an Action Plan: It's like having a GPS to guide your
kids from dependence to independence. Set deadlines and
consequences, like a roadmap to a bright future.
3. Avoid Enabling: Don't be an ATM for your adult kids.
Enabling creates "adultolescents." Set boundaries to
encourage growth and independence.
4. Embrace the "Hard Love": Parenting isn't always sunshine
and rainbows, but tough love helps your children learn life's
lessons. Support, but don't shield them from consequences.
5. Create an Exit Plan: Gradually transition your adult child to
fly solo. It's like helping a little bird leave the nest and soar
confidently into the sky.

25
 Quizzes

1. When expressing expectations to your adult child, what

approach should you take? a) Be vague and mysterious b)
Communicate openly and honestly c) Write a secret
message in invisible ink
2. What does tough love mean for parents dealing with adult
children? a) Giving in to all their demands b) Showing
support while encouraging growth c) Sending them on a
survival reality show
3. What's the purpose of an exit plan for your adult child? a)
Create an elaborate escape route from the house b)
Gradually transition them to independence c) Teach them
how to play "Exit" board game
4. Why is setting consequences important in the action plan? a)
To give them a taste of punishment b) To encourage growth
and accountability c) To test their detective skills
5. How can parents create a supportive environment for their
adult child's growth? a) Build them a treehouse in the
backyard b) Set clear expectations and boundaries c) Enroll
them in a superhero training program

26
 Reflective Questions

What fears or insecurities might be holding me back from

implementing tough love?
.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

What steps can I take to let go of enabling behaviors and

empower my child to take

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

27
 End Of Chapter Affirmations

I am confident in guiding my adult child towards independence.

My child's future is bright, and I empower them to thrive.

28
 Chapter 5: A Failure to Launch

Chapter Summary

"Boomerang kids," are those young adults who move back in

with their parents after leaving the nest. Drawing from the movie
"Failure to Launch" and personal experiences, the author
skillfully highlights the challenges parents face in letting go and
finding the right balance between care and control. It's tough, but
they remind us that we must "land the helicopter" and allow our
adult children to take on responsibilities and experience
individuation. The chapter stresses the importance of celebrating
rites of passage, like a bat mitzvah or a graduation party, to
recognize and affirm their transition to adulthood. Parenting has
no automatic approach, and releasing our children is both
difficult and rewarding. Ultimately, once we've guided them
toward responsible adulthood, it's time for them to take the reins
and continue their journey.

29
 Key Takeaways

1. Boomerang Kids and Individuation: The passages explore

the phenomenon of "boomerang kids," who return to their
parents' home after leaving. This journey involves the
essential process of individuation, where young adults assert
their identities and strive for independence.
2. Celebrating Rites of Passage: Recognizing significant
milestones in young adults' lives through rites of passage
provides affirmation and support during crucial life transitions.
3. Balancing Care and Control: Parents must find the delicate
balance between caring for their adult children and allowing
them to take on responsibilities independently.
4. Letting Go with Love: Releasing adult children with love and
trust in their capabilities empowers them to navigate the
world on their own.
5. Parenting as a Unique Journey: There is no one-size-fits-all
approach to parenting young adults; it requires flexibility and
adaptability as parents adjust their roles to guide and support
their children on their path to responsible adulthood.

30
 Quizzes

1. "Boomerang kids" means a) Children who excel in

boomerang throwing. b) Young adults who move back in with
their parents. c) Kids with a fascination for boomerang-
shaped toys.
2. Individuation is: a) A type of fruit often eaten in winter. b) The
process of becoming independent of parents. c) A new
fashion trend for young adults.
3. Rites of passage are meant to: a) Mark important milestones
in adulthood. b) Celebrate the end of a great movie. c)
Reinforce helicopter parenting.
4. The transition to adulthood requires a) A one-size-fits-all
approach. b) Continuing parental involvement in all aspects.
c) Letting go and allowing young adults to be responsible.
5. Once parents have guided their children to adulthood, the
next step is: a) Micromanaging their every move. b) Relaxing
and trusting in their growth. c) Ignoring their progress and
achievements

31
 Reflective Questions

What aspects of your parenting style might be considered

"helicopter parenting"? How can you transition to a more adult-
adult relationship with your grown-up children?
.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

How do you handle the balance between care and control in your
parenting approach?

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

32
 End Of Chapter Affirmations

I release my children with love, knowing they are capable and

resilient.

I celebrate my child's achievements with joy and excitement.

33
 Chapter 6: When Your Grown Child Violates Your
Values

Chapter Summary

Parenting adult children is one hell of a challenge for sometimes

they make poor choices or stray from faith. It emphasizes the
importance of tough love, setting boundaries, and maintaining a
loving relationship. The author shares a poignant story of a friend
whose daughter's unexpected marriage decision led to
heartbreak. Drawing from the biblical tale of the prodigal son, the
narrative highlights redemption and hope for children to return to
the right path.
Factors contributing to a loss of faith in adult children are
discussed, along with strategies for parents, such as prayer and
seeking support. The chapter encourages focusing on gratitude,
attitude, and perspective while trusting in God's unfailing love. It
offers a message of hope that children often find their way back
to faith in time.

34
 Key Takeaways

1. Tough love conveys love without giving approval. It involves

setting firm boundaries while maintaining a loving
relationship with your adult child.
2. Children who make poor choices or stray from faith may
eventually find their way back. Trust in the power of
redemption and hope for their journey.
3. Gratitude and a positive attitude can make a significant
difference in parenting and relationships. Embrace
thankfulness even in tough times.
4. Seeking support and professional help when needed is
crucial, especially for complex issues like addictions or
mental health challenges.
5. Trust in God's unfailing love and plan. Relinquish your
children to His care, knowing that He loves them even more
than you do and is always with you on this parenting journey.

35
 Quizzes

1. Tough love aims to promote positive growth and

responsibility in adult children by: a) Enabling their behavior
b) Setting firm boundaries c) Ignoring their actions
2. What biblical principle offers hope for parents when their
children stray from faith? a) "Train up a child in the way he
should go..." b) "Let them find their own way without
guidance." c) "Faith can't be restored once it's lost."
3. What is one of the contributing factors to an atrophied faith in
adult children? a) Overwhelming support from family and
friends b) Neglecting spiritual disciplines c) Having too much
trust in God
4. When children reject the faith, maintaining a climate of
openness and grace involves: a) Criticizing and condemning
their choices b) Keeping communication lines open without
judging c) Cutting off all contact with them
5. What should parents avoid doing when their adult children
violate their values? a) Seeking professional guidance b)
Blaming themselves excessively c) Supporting their children
unconditionally

36
 Reflective Questions

How can I cultivate gratitude and a positive attitude?

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

How can I deepen my trust in God's love and plan?

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

37
 End Of Chapter Affirmations

I am a beacon of love and understanding, guiding my child with

tough love and unwavering support.

I trust in divine timing and divine plans, surrendering my worries

and fears to God

38
 Chapter 7: The High Cost of Money

Chapter Summary

Some keys help us as parents to guide our adult children toward

financial success. It all starts with open communication - we
need to talk to them about our estate plans and end-of-life health
preferences, no matter how uncomfortable. Trust me, it'll save
them from confusion and conflicts later on.
Teaching financial discipline is next on the agenda. We show
them the importance of spending less than they earn, staying
clear of debt, and embracing delayed gratification for a brighter
future.
Being generous and saving wisely is a game-changer.
Encouraging our kids to give 10% and save 10% sets them on
the path to financial prosperity.
Lastly, we lead by example - becoming the financial role model
our kids need. We mentor them through budgeting and show
them the true meaning of responsible stewardship.

39
 Key Takeaways

1. Communicate Your Plans: Whether you have substantial

wealth or not, communicate your estate plans with your
children to avoid surprises and potential conflicts in the
future.
2. Be Transparent About End-of-Life Wishes: Discussing end-
of-life health issues may be uncomfortable, but open
communication helps loved ones make informed decisions
during challenging times.
3. Good Financial Discipline: Teaching children to spend less
than they earn and avoid debt fosters healthy financial
habits, preventing future regrets and misunderstandings.
4. Generosity and Savings: Encourage giving and saving by
setting aside 10% for each. Givers and savers tend to fare
better financially in the long run.
5. The Power of Delayed Gratification: Instill in children the
value of delayed gratification; understanding needs versus
wants and investing for the future leads to financial success.

40
 Quizzes

1. What is the primary lesson about estate planning? a) Leave

money to charity b) Communicate plans with children c)
Create a living trust
2. What helps ease the burden during end-of-life health issues
a) Keeping silent b) Open communication c) Ignoring the
matter
3. What is a key aspect of financial discipline? a) Spending less
than you earn b) Buying on credit c) Accumulating debt
4. What do givers and savers tend to experience? a) Financial
success b) Regret and misunderstanding c) Debts and
conflicts
5. What value does delayed gratification offer? a) Instant
happiness b) Future financial success c) Current wants
fulfillment

41
 Reflective Questions

How can I implement financial discipline in my own life and set

an example for my children?

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

What giving and saving practices can I introduce into my

financial routine?

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.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

42
 End Of Chapter Affirmations

My actions today shape a bright and abundant financial

tomorrow for my kids.

Financial discipline is my superpower; I spend wisely, save

diligently, and steer clear of unnecessary debts.

43
 Chapter 8: In-Laws, Stepfamilies, and the Blend

Chapter Summary

The chapter offers valuable advice on navigating relationships

with in-laws, stepfamilies, and blended families. The core
principle is to "wear beige and keep your mouth shut," which
means focusing on improving the relationship rather than
meddling or criticizing. Tips for success include avoiding making
your child choose between you and their new family, refraining
from complaints or criticism, and putting old family issues behind
you. Offering support during challenging times and negotiating
holidays for a win-win are essential for maintaining harmony. In
dealing with stepfamilies and blended families, understanding
the complexities and not taking things personally is crucial.
Building positive relationships with step-grandchildren involves
showing love, being present, and accepting them as your own.
The chapter reminds us that relationships may be imperfect, but
with compassion and patience, they can evolve into something
beautiful.

44
 Key Takeaways

1. "Wear beige and keep your mouth shut": Focus on improving

relationships, not meddling or criticizing in-law relationships.
The key is to prioritize the health of the relationship.
2. Avoid forcing choices: Don't make your child choose
between you and their new family. Show love to your in-law
for your adult child's sake, even if you don't approve.
3. Steer clear of complaints: Constant complaints or criticisms
about your in-law can strain the relationship with your adult
child. Be quick to overlook minor offenses.
4. Let go of past issues: Put old family grievances in the past
and mend relationships if needed. Taking the lead in creating
positive dynamics can influence others to follow suit.
5. Offer support and flexibility: Be there for your adult child and
their spouse during challenging times. Negotiate holidays for
a win-win situation, making celebrations stress-free and
enjoyable for everyone involved.

45
 Quizzes

1. What's the core principle for in-law relationships? a) Speak

your mind b) Wear beige and keep quiet c) Start a feud
2. What's the best way to handle old family issues? a) Stir up
the past b) Ignore them c) Mend and move on
3. How can you win over step-grandkids? a) Shower them with
love and gifts b) Be strict and distant c) Keep your distance
4. What should you avoid when your child's marriage
struggles? a) Complain and criticize b) Offer support and
love c) Run away
5. How to handle holidays with blended families? a) Make it all
about you b) Negotiate and adapt c) Ignore your kids' needs

46
 Reflective Questions

Have you ever pushed your child to pick sides in a family

conflict? How can you change that?

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

Reflect on past grievances with family members. Are they worth

holding on to?

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

.......................................................................................................

47
 End Of Chapter Affirmations

I embrace my in-law with love and acceptance.

I choose understanding over complaints in my relationships.

48
 Chapter 9: It’s Party Time with the Grandkids

Chapter Summary

This heartwarming chapter celebrates the joys of grandparenting

and the impact it can have on generations to come. The narrator
fondly reminisces about their beloved grandma Nene, a
character who brought love and laughter into their life. They also
admire their mother's role as a party-time grandma, creating a
positive atmosphere for family and friends. The chapter
emphasizes the significance of leaving a legacy of love and faith
for grandchildren.
Practical ideas for influencing grandkids are shared, including
building lifelong memories and traditions, being present and
generous, and offering constant grace and support. The
importance of celebrating every milestone and recognizing the
role of a mentor is highlighted. Supporting adult children without
imposing and embracing the unique love for grandchildren is
encouraged. The chapter concludes with the narrator's emotional
experience of being honored with a grandchild named after
them, inspiring a commitment to being a transitional generation,
positively shaping their family's future.

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 Key Takeaways

1. Embrace Your Grandparent Persona: Be like Nene, quirky

and unforgettable, and shower your adult children with
unconditional love and fun.
2. Build Traditions & Make Memories: From Sunday family time
to special trips, create cherished traditions that will last for
generations.
3. Grace & Generosity: Offer your adult children constant
grace, support, and thoughtful gifts. Celebrate their
milestones and make every moment count.
4. Be Their Mentor: Share your experiences and wisdom, be
their safe haven, and inspire them to navigate life's
challenges with confidence.
5. Support & Honor Your Adult Children: Assist them without
imposing, respect their parenting choices, and strengthen the
bond between them and their kids.

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 Quizzes

1. How should parents approach their adult children's

decisions? a) Respect their independence b) Imposing strict
rules c) Micromanage their choices
2. What should parents provide to their adult children? a)
Unconditional support and encouragement b) Constant
criticism and judgment c) Ignorance and indifference
3. How can parents strengthen the bond with their adult
children? a) Cherish the relationship and be a safe haven b)
Meddle in their lives and impose advice c) Be distant and
disconnected
4. What role do parents play in their adult children's lives? a)
Constantly intervene in every aspect b) Trust them to handle
their responsibilities c) Make decisions on their behalf
5. How can parents positively influence their adult children's
parenting journey? a) Offer love and support to their
grandchildren b) Stay distant and uninvolved c) Criticize and
judge their parenting choices

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 Reflective Questions

How can I create unique and lasting traditions with my adult

children?

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How can I offer constant grace and support without being

overbearing?

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 End Of Chapter Affirmations

I will be an unforgettable parent in my journey with my kids

I am a wise and trusted mentor, guiding my kids with love and

support.

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 Practical Exercises

Set boundaries and let your adult child take responsibility for
their decisions.

Memorize a few open-ended questions to ask your children

during conversations, showing genuine interest in their lives
and decisions.

Reflect on your parenting style and adjust to meet your adult

child's needs and culture.

Gradually reduce financial support to encourage self-

reliance.

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Allow your adult child to take on a new responsibility, such as
decisions about their career.

Develop a budget that ensures spending less than you earn,

and stick to it.

Celebrate every milestone with excitement and thoughtful

gifts.

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 All Affirmations

I leave a legacy of love and I will impact the children with this
legacy

I embrace the journey of parenting adult children with grace

and understanding

My words have power, and I choose to use them to bless

and uplift my children.

As a parent, I embrace my role as a mentor, supporting and

guiding my adult children with wisdom and care

I trust God's plan for my child's adultolescence journey.

Walking in faith, I meet them where they are.

I am confident in guiding my adult child towards

independence.

My child's future is bright, and I empower them to thrive.

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I release my children with love, knowing they are capable
and resilient.

I celebrate my child's achievements with joy and excitement.

I am a beacon of love and understanding, guiding my child

with tough love and unwavering support.

I trust in divine timing and divine plans, surrendering my

worries and fears to God

My actions today shape a bright and abundant financial

tomorrow for my kids.

Financial discipline is my superpower; I spend wisely, save

diligently, and steer clear of unnecessary debts.

I embrace my in-law with love and acceptance.

I choose understanding over complaints in my relationships.

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