You Can Negotiate Anything

By – HERB COHEN
 Author’s Profile:
• Herb Cohen - a practicing negotiator for more than three
decades in U.S.A. He is a person with extensive practical
experience and unique presentation style which made him
internationally renowned as someone who can articulate and
explain complex events.
• You Can Negotiate Anything, which was on the New York
Times Bestseller List for almost one year and has been
translated into twenty-one languages. 
• Other works
– Negotiate This! By Caring But Not T-H-A-T Much 
 Part 1

Yes, You Can

 What is Negotiation?

“A field of knowledge and endeavor that focuses on gaining the

favor of people from whom we want things.”

• It is also about satisfaction of needs.

 Negotiation contd.
• Prestige, Freedom, Money, Justice, Status, Love, Security and
recognition - all can be negotiated.

• At least two parties with unsatisfied needs are required for a

negotiation.
 Negotiation occurs when we want
to:
• Reconcile Differences

• Manage Conflict

• Resolve Dispute

• Establish or Adjust Relationship

 Elements of Negotiation
Every negotiation comes with 3 elements
• Information:
The other side seems to know more about you than you
know about them.
• Time:
The other side does not seem to be under any time
restriction as you are.
• Power:
The other side seems to have more power than you
think you have.
 When to Negotiate?
• Are you comfortable negotiating in a given
situation?

• Will negotiating meet the needs?

• Is the energy and the time spent on

negotiation worth the benefits you receive?
 Criteria for an Ultimatum to Succeed
• Frosting on the Cake
- Negotiation should not begin with an ultimatum
- Ultimatum must come at the end

• Soften Palatable
- Either Hard or Soft ultimatum should not be used
- Hard ones might offend the other side
- While soft ones are only a statement

• A recipe that can’t be tampered with

- Backing up the statement with some document

• Selection from a limited menu

- Leave the other side with choices
- Never state “It’s this or nothing!”
 Part 2

Three Crucial variables

 Power
• Everyone has power, irony is, not everyone knows how to put
it to its proper use.

• Power is neutral in its actual sense, but can manifest

depending on the use, two views exist
– Power as a medium & not as a goal of life
– Power to manipulate
 Manifestations of Power
• Power of Competition
– Never enter any negotiation without options.

• Power of Legitimacy
– Printed words, documents and signs carry authority.

• Power of Risk taking

– Knowledge of the odds and philosophical willingness to absorb
manageable losses.

• Power of Identification
– Negotiating ability is maximized if one gets others to identify with him.
 Manifestations Contd..
• Power of Commitment
– Persuade others to help, get them involved and they’ll shoulder part
of the burden.

• Power of Expertise
– Establish your background and credentials early in the
confrontation.

• Power of the knowledge of “needs”

– Adapt a style to satisfy the real needs of the other side.

• Power of Investment
– Resource investment and compromise are directly proportional.
 Manifestations Contd..
• Power of Rewarding or Punishing
– Advantage rests with the one who knows the needs and
perceptions of the other side, while the other side thinks
he is more powerful.

• Power of Morality
– If you lay morality on people in an unqualified manner, it
often works.

• Power of Precedent
– They have got it; we should get it too attitude.
 Manifestations Contd..
• Power of Persistence
– Learn to hang in there and be tenacious.

• Power of Persuasive Capacity

– Convincing others to meet one’s needs and desires.

• Power of Attitude
– Regard the negotiation process as a game or a fun filled
activity.
 TIME
• Time and tide waits for none, but there's always a tide
behind.

• Negotiation is not an event (time restricted). WHY?

– Deadlines are always there, be patient enough. Deadlines
are negotiable.
– Don’t reveal your deadline, make effort to the other
party’s deadline.
– Keep your cool. Grass only looks greener on the other side
– Perseverance is the key
 INFORMATION
• It’s the key to the vault of success.

• The process of information gathering precedes any

negotiation.

• Methods of information gathering:

– Probing
– Third party contacts
– Personal leverage
– Understanding Cues
 PART 3

STYLES OF NEGOTIATING
“A Tactic perceived is not a Tactic”
 Three styles of Negotiating:
• Win-Lose ( Soviet Style ) – winning at the expense of
other

• Collaborative Negotiation – lies in finding out what the

other side really wants and showing them a way to get
it, while u get what you want.

• Win-Win – both the parties will share the benefits.

 Negative notions about
Negotiation:
• There is a misconception shared by many great people.
• Negotiator is a “Slick manipulator who is attempting to
win at expense of some innocent victim”.
• But the competitive strategy is the only one approach to
get what u want.
Characters of Soviet Style Negotiation:
• Extreme Initial Positions.
• Limited Authority.
• Emotional Tactics.
1. Tears 2. Laughter 3. Threat 4. Guilt.
• Adversary Concessions viewed as Weakness.
• Stingy in their Concessions.
• Ignore Deadlines.
 Tactics help Soviet style:

• No continuing relationship.

• No remorse afterward.

• No awareness by victim.
 Collaborative Negotiation :
• Using the process to meet needs
– It’s all in the approach.
– Eg: The clock sale.
• Harmonizing or reconciling needs
– Eg: Howard Hughes and Russell Jane contract if $1
million.
 Conflict
• Conflict is actual or perceived opposition of needs,
values and interests.

• It can occur sometimes due to same demand but

different styles to approach it.

• Reasons of conflict:
– Experience- we are all captives of the pictures in our head.
– Information
– Role
• A finance and a Marketing manager.
 Win-Win technique
• “ If the focus shifts from defeating each other to defeating
the problem, everyone can benefit”

• Negotiation are never totally for what is being openly

talked about, be it price, services, products, territory,
concessions, interest rates, or money. What is being
discussed and the manner in which it is discussed, are
used to satisfy PSYCHOLOGICAL needs.
 Three Important activities for the
Win-Win Negotiation
• Building trust – “we make our fortunes and call
them fate”.
– The process stage.
– The formal event.
Eg: Stranger offering something in a competition.
• Gaining commitment.
– Eg: Buy a house
• Managing opposition.
– Two types of opposition:
• Idea opponents. Eg: Job with a salary of $30000.
• Visceral opponents- hate your ideas but also
hate you as a human being
 The Specific “Game Plan” for
building trust
• Establish trust.
• Obtain information.
• Meet his needs.
• Use his ideas.
• Transform relationship to collaboration.
• Take moderate risk.
• Get his help.
– Eg: A man goes to a new shop to buy Video recorder
and a new T.V.
There is always risk involved in making Visceral opponents.
“ For every action there is equal and opposite reaction”.
“Don’t humiliate anybody in public”.
Eg: Open door policy in an office.

Avoiding Visceral opponents:

1. Never forget the power of your Attitude.
2. Never judge the actions and motives of others.
 Solution to the problem:
• Compromise – results in an agreement in which each
side gives up something it really wanted.

“ Half a loaf is better than none”.

“A good negotiation outcome is one where both sides are

somewhat dissatisfied”
 Part 4

Negotiating Anything, Any Place

 Tele Negotiation
• Telephone - a vital verbal link in modern life.

• Million dollar transactions now a days happen through

phone.
 Phone Negotiation Characteristics
• More misunderstanding
– Lack of visual feedback
• Easy to say ‘NO’
• Quicker in nature
• More competitive
– A win lose situation flourishes.
• More risk
– ‘Quick is Risk’
• Advantage to caller as callee is handicapped.
 Tips For success
• Be caller and not callee.

• Plan & prepare

– Prepare check list of points to be covered
– If facts are present be ready with reference materials.
– At end summarize what was agreed by callee.

• Graceful exit

• Have discipline to listen.

 Memorandum Of
Agreement/Understanding
• Once the telephone negotiation is over it is necessary to
draft the entire negotiation and pass it on to the other
party.

• It is the document composed after resolution of

conflict/dispute

• MOA/MOU- to define the commitments of parties

involved.

• It is better to take the responsibility of constructing MOA.

 Moving up in Negotiation
• While negotiation deal only with apt persons.

• Never waste time on dealing with individual who lack

authority.

• Try to be demanding to the person who doesn’t have any

authority, and make sure he directs you to concerned
authorized person.
 Exceptions

• Dilution of rules – During negotiation rules can be

ignored, unless they are harmful. It is strictly on basis of
mutual agreement between parties.
 Final Word

• Never ‘give up’ and never ‘give in’.

 Personalizing

• Process of humanizing yourself, making yourself identifiable

with the circumstance.
 Personalizing
• In any negotiation personalize yourself and situation

• How to personalize your self

– Make the other person feel u are an unique individual, u have
feelings, someone who cares for him, obligated to him

• How to personalize Situation

– Negotiate on behalf of yourself, representing the institution.
Never negotiate on behalf of any institution or organization.
– Eg – On behalf of IBS-B we would like to invite----
 Personalizing contd..
• Make the other person feel/concerned for you.

• Make them emotionally involve.

• Women better in personalizing thus making them better

negotiators.
 Day To Day experience
• Personalizing has a great role to play in Day to Day life.

• Eg:- Negotiation between house owner and tenant.

 Tips for personalizing
• Never carry any effective technique to such an extreme
that it no longer becomes effective.

• Act as per circumstance

 Conclusion
• Destiny is determined by one’s own effort so never back
away from exercising your power.

• Negotiation is not always about getting what you want,

but part of what you want should be to help others.
 Review
• This book talks about the strategies for successful negotiation
with ease.
• Author presents 3 important aspects of negotiation
– Information
– Time &
– Power
• The explanation is aptly presented under each topic.
• Imparts knowledge in an interesting way.
• The book relates to all age groups.
• Instances presented are humorous, making it an enjoyable
read.
• A Few of the examples are region-specific.
 Comments
• Some of it looks outdated because the information
era has changed the scenario eg cellphones
• Predominantly US based . Cross- Cultural issues not
considered adequately
• Money seems to be the most important platform for
negotiation!! Is it adequate
• Gender bias.
• Point made about Mahatma Gandhi using guilt ploy
to gain independence not n good taste.
 Comment:
• Examples are mostly on price, however in life
many other variables can be negotiated such
as need, choice, delivery, timing, etc
• Examples from USA however in India one gets
used to negotiation???
• More emphasis needed on TRUST
• Communication issues
• What can we negotiate in business:
 COMMENT: ON NEGOTIATION
• EVERY ONE NEGOTIATES
• NEGOTIATION DEPENDS ON
COMMUNICATION
• EVERY DESIRE THAT DEMANDS SATISFACTION
IS A POTENTIAL NEGOTIATION CANDIDATE
 WHAT CAN WE NEGOTIATE IN BUSINESS:
• PRICE
• TERMS
• DELIVERY
• QUALITY
• SERVICE
• TRAINING
• RESOURCES (PEOPLE, MONEY, MATERIALS)
• WARRANTY
COMMUNICATION/CULTURE ETC
 COMMUNICATION STYLES
• FRENCH MAIN COMPANY/ JAPANESE
SUBSIDIARY
• SUBSIDIARY SHOULD BUY FROM SAME
SUPPLIERS AS PARENT COMPANY
• REACTION ONE OF THE TEAM MEMBERS SAID
“THIS WILL BE VERY DIFFICULT FOR US”
• FRENCH UNDERSTOOD IT AS “ NOT EASY, BUT
NOT IMPOSSIBLE EITHER”
• JAPANESE WERE SAYING “ THIS IS
ABSOLUTELY OUT OF THE QUESTION. THERE’S
NO WAY WE CAN AGREE TO THIS”
 AN IRISH COMMUNICATION JOKE
• A TOURIST APPROACHES TWO FELLOWS AND
ASKS THEM HOW FAR IT IS TO THE MUSEUM.
ONE RESPONDS “ TWO KM” . THE TOURIST
THANKS HIM AND GOES OFF,
• THE OTHER ASKS HIM “WHY DID YOU TELL
HIM THAT……
• THE REPLY “ THE POOR GUY IS WALKING”
 TAKING RESPONSIBILITY
• JAPANESE TO EUROPEANS - WHY DO YOU
ALWAYS HAVE TO GIVE EXCUSES – I DID NOT
MEET THE DEAD LINE BECAUSE THE
SOFTWARE HAD BUGS, I WAS GIVEN WRONG
FIGURES, OR DATABASE HAS NOT BEEN
UPDATED……..
• INDIVIDUALISTIC VS GROUP
 CULTURE

SOFTWARE OF THE MIND

It is interrelated, learned and shared
 ELEMENTS OF CULTURE
• LANGUAGE
VERBAL
NON-VERBAL
• RELIGION
• VALUES AND ATTITUDES
• MATERIAL ELEMENTS
• AESTHETICS
• EDUCATION
• SOCIAL INSTITUTIONS
 FIXED TRUTH – RELATIVE TRUTH
• FIXED TRUTH – THERE ARE CLEAR RIGHT AND WRONG
• RELATIVE TRUTH – WHAT IS RIGHT AND WRONG DEPENDS
ON THE CIRCUMSTANCE.
• FIXED TRUTH – NORTH AMERICANS, EUROPEANS,
AUSTRALIANS
• RELATIVE TRUTH – EAST,SOUTH EAST AND SOUTH ASIA,
AFRICA, AROUND THE MEDITERRANEAN
HIGH CONTEXT
VS
LOW CONTEXT
 HIGH CONTEXT - LOW CONTEXT
• HIGH CONTEXT - BUSINESS RELATIONSHIPS
ARE COMPLICATED. THEREFORE BE
DIPLOMATIC, IMPLICIT AND INDIRECT

• LOW CONTEXT – BUSINESS RELATIONSHIPS

ARE COMPLICATED. THEREFORE BE FRANK,
EXPLICIT AND DIRECT
 HIGH CONTEXT
• LAWYERS ARE NOT IMPORTANT
• PERSON’S WORD IS HIS BOND
• RESPONSIBILITY FOR ORGANISATIONAL
ERROR TAKEN BY HIGHEST LEVEL
• POLYCHRONIC – NO HURRY
• COMPETITIVE BIDDING – INFREQUENT
 High context cultures
• Arab cultures
• France
• Japan
• Mediterranean cultures
• Russia
 LOW CONTEXT
• LAWYERS ARE VERY IMPORTANT
• DON’T RELY ON A PERSON’S WORD – GET IT IN
WRITING
• RESPONSIBILITY FOR ORGANISATIONAL ERROR –
PUSHED TO LOWEST LEVEL
• PEOPLE HAVE A PRIVATE SPACE
• TIME IS MONOCHROMATIC – TIME IS MONEY
• NEGOTIATIONS PROCEED QUICKLY
• COMPETITIVE BIDDING IS COMMON
 Low-context cultures

• Germany
• Scandinavian cultures
• Switzerland
• United States
 HANDLING THE HIERARCHY
• IN SWEDEN THERE IS NO HIERARCHY
• THE MUMBAI STORY
• IN INDIA ???
 NON-VERBAL LANGUAGE
• Nodding – we understand it as YES
- Greece, Bulgaria and Turkey it
means NO
• Thumbs up sign – to us ‘Good’
- France – deal is worthless
- Japan – a little bribe has
been asked for
• Smiling – In Japan people smile when they are sad,
angry and confused
• Earlobe pinching – Brazil – shows appreciation
• Waving – In China – means “come here”
• Using One hand – Japan – pass someone an item
with one hand , it is considered as an epitome of
rudeness.
• Beckoning – with an index finger- obscene in
Portugal, Spain, Latin America, Japan, Indonesia and
Hong Kong.
• Crossing fingers – rudest gesture in Paraguay
 MAKING SMALL TALK
• JAPAN, ARABS – GAIN TRUST
• NO SMALL TALK WITH GERMANS, SWISS,
SCANDINAVIANS AND FINNS
 MANNERS AND CUSTOMS
• Understanding manners and customs
Americans often interpret inaction and silence
as a negative sign
Russians have an abrasive style and it is usual
for them to come up with last minute change
requests.
Finland – they may continue negotiations in the
Sauna bath.
 MANNERS AND CUSTOMS

• Prepare for understanding the negotiating party’s

way of thinking
• Pay attention to the necessity to save face
• Read up on the host country- history, culture,
government and image of foreigners
• Recognize decision making process and the role of
personal relations and personalities.
• Allocate sufficient time for negotiations.
TRUST
 How Culture Affects Negotiation
Interests Potential for Interests
And Integrative And
Priorities Agreement Priorities

Culture A Type of Culture B

Negotiator Agreement Negotiator

Strategies Pattern of Strategies

Interaction

Source : J.M. Brett, “Culture and Negotiation,” Intl jrl of Psy, 2000
 Take Away:
• Many dimensions to approach Negotiations.
• He relates practical examples uniquely with
each situation.
• Win-Win situation is the best negotiation
policy.
• It gives a perspective to tackle Visceral
opponents intelligently.
• “Trust” – only mantra for success.