When forgiving, I should always try

to forgive and forget.

It’s good to get angry when I’m
trying to forgive.
I should give up all hard feelings
toward the person I forgive.
I should try to forgive others quickly
and completely.
Over time, my hurt will go away and
my forgiveness of the other person
will take care of itself.
If I have forgiven, I will never have
feelings of hatred against those who
have hurt me.
If I forgive, I am in some way saying
that what happened to me didn’t
matter.
Forgiveness is basically a one-time
decision. Either I forgive or not.
I can’t forgive until the person who
hurt me repents.
I should forgive even if the person
who hurt me does not repent.
Forgiving the Unforgivable
What is unforgivable?
something so out of the ordinary that it shakes our
moral foundations to their roots

something done that should not have

been done

something not done that should have

been done

something done by someone

trusted and loved
Forgiveness always involves the moral
side of life.
…right and wrong
…fairness
…justice
…love
…compassion
…mercy
When someone violates us with a
seemingly unforgivable act, at least one
of these values have been violated.
We then experience an internal conflict.
If we are to forgive, it feels like we must
deny our own of justice and fairness,
But not to forgive is to deny our
sense of love and compassion.
REVENGE
“He who seeks revenge should
dig two graves.”
Not all anger is bad, but anger that
is held onto eventually becomes
bitterness.
Bitterness destroys us.
Myths and Truths
about Forgiveness
When forgiving, I should always try
to forgive and forget.

FALSE
“For I will forgive their wrongdoing, and
I will never again remember their sins.”

-Hebrews 8:12
God is omniscient, but we are not.
It’s good to get angry when I’m trying
to forgive.

TRUE
Anger is a necessary part of the
forgiving process.
The unforgivable acts done to
us represent something that
has been lost.
Grieving begins with denial and
end with acceptance of the
reality that exists.
I should give up all hard feelings
toward the person I forgive.

TRUE
Forgiveness means to cease to feel
resentment against an offender.

-Merriam Webster
I should try to forgive others quickly
and completely.

FALSE
True forgiveness is an internal
process of healing that cannot be
rushed.
Forgiveness depends on the depth
and seriousness of the offense.
Over time, my hurt will go away and my
forgiveness of the other person will take
care of itself.

FALSE
Forgiveness doesn’t just happen. It
always begins with a CHOICE.
“Time heals all wounds.”
Desensitization and repression are
not forgiveness.
If I have forgiven, I will never have
feelings of hatred against those who
have hurt me.

FALSE
When we have been deeply hurt, we
may well have feelings of hatred
toward the person who hurt us.
“Love your enemies.”
-Matthew 5:44
The opposite of love is fear, not hate.
While we may feel hatred toward the
person who hurt us, we are not to stay
in this negative emotion.
If I forgive, I am in some way saying
that what happened to me didn’t
matter.

FALSE
Forgiveness never makes evil act into
something good.
“Well then, shall we keep on sinning so that God can
keep on showing us more and more kindness and
forgiveness? Of course not! Should we keep on
sinning when we don’t have to?”

-Romans 6:1-2
Forgiveness is basically a one-time
decision. Either I forgive or not.

FALSE
Forgiveness is both a decision and
a process.
I can’t forgive until the person who
hurt me repents.

FALSE
“For if you forgive other people when they
sin against you, your heavenly Father will
also forgive you.”

-Matthew 6:14
I should forgive even if the person
who hurt me does not repent.

TRUE
Forgiveness is an act done for the one
who was hurt. The offender owes us, but
he or she may never be able to repay
even if he or she wants to.
What if the offender is dead?
Forgiveness doesn’t mean
reconciliation.