WEEK 6:

Active Listening Skills

The Heart of Empathic Understanding
 What is active listening?

Active listening involves:

• communicating verbally and nonverbally

• practicing “uninterrupted” listening
• restating the message
• observing the sender’s nonverbal signals
Why practice active listening?

• Helps us understand others better

• Show others we respect them
• Allows us to receive accurate messages
• Enables us to respond appropriately
How to practice active listening

• Physical environment
• Attending posture: SOLER
• Listening skills
• Questioning skills
Physical environment

• Ensure privacy
• Minimize interruptions
• Eliminate barriers
 Attending posture

Nonverbal skill = SOLER

• S= squarely face person
• O= use open posture
• L= lean toward the person
• E= use eye contact
• R= relax, keep it natural
• According to Gerald Egan, author of the supplement you read from the “Skilled Helper: A
Problem-Management Approach to Helping
 Listening skills
• Reflective statements get at the real meaning
A reflective statement is one in which the listener rephrases what the sender has
said. However, this must be done without restating exactly what was said.
The listener should rephrase the sentence in her own words to show that she
understood the communicated message, or to say that she needs clarification.
Think of how many times you have talked with someone and even though they were
saying one thing, the way they were standing or the way they were avoiding eye
contact with you gave you a completely different impression.
This is why it is important to observe the sender while he is talking. You will be able
to pick up on how he is feeling just by the way he may be standing. For example,
while crossing arms, say “I am really in agreement with you.”)
The instructor may wish to point out the photos at the bottom of the screen and talk
about each one briefly. Nonverbal and verbal cues often conflict!
• Recognize nonverbal posture: It’s the real thing!

bored overwhelmed closed

 LISTENING SKILLS
Active listening is very important in interpersonal communication
because
1.People are more easily persuaded by spoken communication than by
written communication
2.In spoken communication we have less time to evaluate what is being
said
3.We are less inclined to be critical of spoken communication
4.Poor listening stops the flow of conversation because speakers
quickly become aware that they are not being listened to.
5.Poor listening results in poor understanding both of the facts and of
the speaker attitudes and emotions
Barriers to effective listening
• Cultural differences
• The speakers and listeners role in the organization
• The perceived credibility of the speaker or listener
• Stereotyping
• Manipulative behavior
• Insensitive use of language
• Effects of non verbal behavior
• Selective perception
• The place where listening occurs
• The emotions of the speaker and the listener
• The type of technical language used.
Techniques for effective listening
• Decide why you are listening- get the main ideas, draw proper
inferences from the material , hear difficulty material
• Motivate yourself to listen actively
• Regard listening as a physical and mental process
• Show that you are listening by leaning forward and giving verbal and
non verbal feedback
• Listen until you have heard the full message. Then respond do not
jump into a conclusion before the full message is over
• Ensure you evaluate the whole message
• Try to see the message from speakers point of view-(emphathic
listening)
• Check the meaning of words with the speaker to ensure that you
share the same meaning.
Reflecting
• Purpose
• To show that you understand how the person feels.
• Action
• Reflects the speaker’s basic feelings.
• Example:
“You seem very upset.”
Encouraging

• Purpose
• To convey interest.
• To encourage the other person to keep talking.
• Action
• Don’t agree or disagree.
• Use neutral words.
• Use varying voice intonations.
• Example
• “Can you tell me more…?”
Summarizing

• Purpose
• To review progress.
• To pull together important ideas and facts.
• To establish a basis for further discussion.
• Action
• Restate major ideas expressed, including feelings.
• Example
• “These seem to be the key ideas you’ve expressed…”
Clarifying

• Purpose
• To help you clarify what is said.
• To get more information.
• To help the speaker see other points of view.
• Action
• Ask questions.
• Restate wrong interpretation to force the speaker to explain further.
• Example
• “When did this happen?”
• “Do I have this right? You think he told you to give him the pencil
because he doesn’t like you?”
Restating

• Purpose
• To show you are listening and understanding what is
being said.
• To help the speaker see other points of view.
• Action
• Restate basic ideas and facts.
• Example
• “So you would like your friends to include you at recess, is
that right?”
Validating

• Purpose
• To acknowledge the worthiness of the other person.
• Action
• Acknowledge the value of their issues and feelings.
• Show appreciation for their efforts and actions.
• Example
• “I truly appreciate your willingness to resolve this
matter.”