Core Counseling Skills

(updated with examples)

BES31421: mcarrevillaga@ust.edu.ph
Rapport building – Attend to clients
physically and psychologically. Be
attentive both verbally and nonverbally.
Apply SOLER:
◦ Face the client SQUARELY
◦ Adopt an OPEN posture
◦ LEAN forward slightly
◦ Maintain EYE CONTACT
◦ Be RELAXED

Core Counseling Skills

Opening and Closing Counseling Interview

Structuring – defining the nature, limits,

roles and goals within the counseling
relationship

Responding Skills – paraphrasing,

reflecting, clarifying, linking, summarizing
 If I understand you correctly, you’re saying that ….
 You really mean that ….
 As you see it, ….
 From your perspective, ….
 Let me see if I get where you’re coming from on that
concern, you think that ….
 From what you’ve said, I understand that your bottom line
is ….
 Let me see if I understand your statement correctly. You
believe that ….
 I’m not sure if I see what you’re driving at. You’re saying
that….

Paraphrasing Responses
Although you didn’t say so directly, you
seem to be suggesting that …. Is that
what you mean?
I’m not exactly sure what you mean by….
Could you explain it to me with a little
more detail and give me some examples?
From what you’ve said, I presume you
mean… Is that correct?

Clarifying “loaded”statements
From what you are saying, I’m getting the
distinct impression that you feel … but I’m
not sure that’s what you mean. Is my
impression right or wrong?
I’m not really sure what you mean when
you say that you ‘expected more’ from
me. Could you give a few examples of
how I disappointed you?

Clarifying Loaded Statements

 Reflecting feelings – 3 aspects of the skill are:
◦ Listening for feeling (Listen to what is not said)
◦ Timing (Don’t cut off an internal flow or disturb focus)
◦ Reflecting (Use a feeling word when the client may not have
said one)
 “So from your point of view, it’s ….”
 “It sounds like you’re feeling….”
 “You believe…”
 “It seems like…”
 “What I sense is that you’re feeling…”
 “It might be that you….”

How Reflective Listening might

sound
In the final analysis, our group has
decided to ….
Now that all is said and clarified, let me
present to you the highlights of our
discussion ….
If we take care of those final details, then
can we assume that we have a deal?
So let me wrap up what we have agreed
upon as a group ….

Linking/Summarizing Skills
Information gathering – use of more
open-ended questions, if necessary; use
of non-directive leads

Information giving – aims to correct

erroneous information to identify and/or
evaluate alternatives; teachable moments
to expand the meaning or learning for the
client
Ask open-ended questions.
◦ “How did you feel about….?”
◦ “What do you think about…?”

◦ NOT “Did you feel left out or taken for

granted?”
◦ “Do you think your work status is unstable?”

Guidelines in Asking Questions:

Information Gathering Skill
 Avoid either-or questions. (“Do you want to get married or
stay single?”
 Try to use indirect questions. (NOT “How does it feel to have
a broken home? BETTER: “I wonder how it feels to have ….”
 Use non-directive leads, such as:
◦ How do you feel about it?
◦ What have you tried so far?
◦ For instance?
◦ Can you give an example?
◦ In what way?
◦ How does it look right now?
◦ What seems to be your greatest obstacle?
 Summarizing content and feelings – can be used at the beginning to
review what transpired in the previous sessions or at the end to
review what took place
 Confrontation – taking note of discrepancies/inconsistencies
between words and actions of the client; most effective when done
from a caring position that shows respect for the client and
validates him as a worthwhile individual
 Interpretation – advanced skill requiring mastery of reflection of
content and feelings whereby the counselor presents the counselee
with a new frame of reference
 Closure – bring a particular issue or problem to some resolution;
terminate work with a client or bring a session to an end

Prepared by: MCArrevillaga, RGC, RPsy