A Guide to

RAISING TEENAGERS

Presenter:
Wil A Campbell
 Deuteronomy 6: 4-9
• 4
Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD:
• 5
And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and
with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
• 6
And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in
thine heart:
• 7
And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt
talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou
walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou
risest up.
• 8
And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they
shall be as frontlets between thine eyes.
• 9
And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on
thy gates.
 Understanding The Teen Years
• It’s a transitional Experience
• It’s different from childhood
• It’s hormonal and social
• Their morality is peer
oriented but not necessarily
peer controlled
• They’re not as fickle (or as
smart) as we often think
• It doesn’t have to be
turbulent
The most important psychological task of
adolescence is the achievement of an
independent identity
What does that mean for Parents of
Teenagers?
 Parents must provide clearly defined
boundaries
• BE THE ADULT!!!
• Expectations must
be clearly
communicated
• Consequences must
be predictable and
consistent
• Teens need
boundaries in order
to feel safe
Parents must model acceptable
behaviours
• Would it be ok if your
teen did exactly what you
are doing now?
• Would you be proud if
your child grows up to be
just like you?
Parents must provide teens with options
and freedoms
 Parents must Keep up
• This is not your
generation
• Old Principles, new
methods
• Stay apprised of new
trends and
developments
• Know the advantages
and dangers of new
technology
Teen rights must be balanced with teen
responsibilities
• Freeloaders become
irresponsible adults
• Work will not kill your teen
• We keep our rights by
fulfilling our responsibilities
• Don’t confuse rights with
privileges!
 Parents must provide a safe emotional
Space
• They need to talk
• Don’t wait for them to
initiate conversation
• Do not Judge!
• Apologise WHEN you’re
wrong
• They don’t always want
to talk to you…and
that’s perfectly ok!
 Parents must be parents…
• Be present

• …Firm and friendly

• Teach Values

• Take the lead

• …Not prone to guilt trips

• … Above the fray

• …Ready to Sacrifice
 Get Your motivation Right
• Not to bring glory to
ourselves
• Not to avoid
embarrassment
• Not to compete with
the neighbours
• We should train our
children for one
purpose only and that
is to honour and glorify
God.
Any questions?
 Parents must be connected with the
Source of all wisdom
• You cannot compete
with the evil
Influences…
• …But you can certainly
win!