Dear Orris

An Advice Column for USFFLer’s Thanksgiving 2003 Issue

Dick Cox says...

FUCK THANKSGIVING!
Dear Orris,

What should all FFLers be thankful for this year?

The League
Peoria, IL

Dear League,

Happy Holiday, you dick-filled splatterpusses. What should you

be thankful for this year? Maybe the fact that only Skook has
tasted my waste paste so far should be enough. I’m thankful I
don’t eat at the Cox household. You should be too!

Love,
Tom Cox is thankful
for Stew’s ass. Orris

P.S. Here are your answers.

Stew is thankful
for his new
protection.

Right...try a hundred!
 Craig Martin is
thankful for the
Packers and a nice
pussy.

Skook’s
thankful this
one doesn’t
spit.

Tim Cox gives

thanks it isn’t
chili this year.

Doug Arnold is
thankful the
league picked his Bill
team and for.... Arnold, his
designated
driver.

Jay’s thankful for

Dann Rawls is thankful for washing up after finally Johnny’s thankful for
Halloween, jack-o-lantern, biting through the the lock on his bedroom
and pump-kin. fuckswing. door.
 Joe’s
Kevin Cox is thankful thankful
Sporting mutated genitalia, Steve for his cabana boy,
Sprague showed off his cheese- Dawn likes
Anaconda. it rough.
filled “hot pocket” to join the
FFL...THANKS.

Kirsch’s ass is
thankful for the
last Thursday in
November.

Missy’s dad,
Joe Morgan,
Zarv’s thankful for says “I love
kicking crack. coctus!”

And in closing, we are all thankful for several

shots of MIISSS-EEEE!