Infinite Impermanence

The second of the 'Four Thoughts that turn the Mind to Practice' is
contemplation on impermanence and death. We are encouraged to
contemplate the precious human rebirth that we have succeeded in
gaining and the fact that one day it will be lost through death. Does
this inspire practise or despondency? have noticed a tendency in the
West toward despondency when death is mentioned. This is a shame!
because it would be preferable to have a sense of hopelessness. The
hopelessness we are aiming for is fearless hopelessness. Trungpa
"inpoche describes this as the #hopelessness that is beyond fear$ % the
realisation that we do not need to fear death! because it happens in
every moment! continually! endlessly. The endless stream of deaths
and rebirths & within life & affords us great opportunities. We can
begin anew in each moment. 'very moment has the potential to be a
moment of realisation.
"eincarnation! metempsychosis(! or palingenesis( has never been a
generally accepted tenet of )hristianity. The 'ncyclopaedia *ritannica
states that it was held as a belief by isolated )hristian sects in the +th
and ,th centuries but was always 'repudiated by orthodo- theologians'!
and that it is also not found in early .ewish te-ts. /ence the idea of
rebirth may seem li0e an 'astern cultural curiosity! and 1uite alien to
Westerners. #"ebirth' is perhaps a misleading word. t suggests that
something is being born again & re%born. n fact the birth is new form
arising from the dissolution of old form. There is a continuity of
connection! but no continuity of substance.
( Metempsychosis is a philosophical term in the 2ree0 language referring to
the belief of transmigration of the soul! especially its reincarnation after
death. t is a doctrine popular among a number of 'astern religions such as
/induism! .ainism and Dru3ism wherein an individual incarnates from one
body to another! either human! animal! or plant. 2enerally the term is only
used within the conte-t of 2ree0 Philosophy! otherwise the phrase
transmigration is more appropriate! but the term has also been used by
modern thin0ers such as 4chopenhauer! 25del! .ames .oyce! and 6iet3sche.
7nother term sometimes used synonymously is Palingenesia.
(( Palingenesis 82r. palin%! again! genesis! becoming! birth9 is a term used
for analogous concepts in philosophy! theology! politics! geology and
biology: n philosophy! the word palingenesis or rather palingenesia may be
traced bac0 to the 4toics! who used the term for the continual re%creation of
the universe by the Demiurgus 8)reator9 after its absorption into himself.
4imilarly Philo spo0e of 6oah and his sons as leaders of a renovation or
rebirth of the earth. Plutarch of the transmigration of souls! and )icero of his
own return from e-ile. n the 6ew Testament the properly theological sense
of spiritual regeneration is found! though the word itself occurs only twice;
and it is used by the church fathers! e.g. for the rite of baptism or for the state
of repentance. n philosophy it denotes in its broadest sense the e1uivalent of
metempsychosis. The term has a narrower and more specific use in the
system of 4chopenhauer! who applied it to his doctrine that the will does not
die but manifests itself afresh in new individuals. /e thus repudiates the
primitive metempsychosis doctrine which maintains the reincarnation of the
particular soul.
This principle is that each moment of being leads to the ne-t moment
of being. This moment may be the moment of living that leads to the
ne-t moment of living; the moment of wa0ing consciousness that
leads to the ne-t moment of sleeping consciousness; the moment of
living consciousness that leads to the ne-t moment of dying
consciousness; or the moment of dying consciousness that leads to the
ne-t moment of living consciousness. #Dying$ here is understood as
the end of the animation of a particular physical form. )onsciousness
continues. There is a stream or continuum of being moments! even if
those being moments result in a movement from one state of being to
another state of being in terms of our physicality. <i0e a stream of
water. f dip a cup in a stream to e-amine the water! the water
contained in the cup will be different from the water e-tracted a few
minutes later. The individual drops of water move! change! arise! and
dissolve! but the integrity of the continuity of the stream itself is not
compromised. The stream can be seen and 0nown and understood as a
continuum! despite the movement and change that denies its e-istence
as a fi-ed entity named 'stream'.
n the same way we recognise a definition of ourselves in terms of a
lifetime. am 6or'd3in and have always been this same person & or so
it seems & even though am aware of the ma=or physical changes that
have occurred to my body over the course of time. may also be
aware on a more subtle level of the psychological changes that have
happened over the years of my life. am not the same person at nine
months old as was at nineteen years! forty years! or ninety! even
though may feel a continuity of being. The sense of continuity is
real! but is not due to 'something' that has e-isted continually without
change. The continuity has a stream%li0e nature! but owing to the
definitions place upon myself! and the relative longevity of
e-periencing myself as this particular being! become rather attached
to e-isting in this form! and frightened about losing it. Death appears
to us li0e a full stop at the end of a long and valued story. t seems
final. >et death is simply the moment when the stream begins to travel
through a new land.
"ebirth denies the possibility of a full stop. From the perspective of
our e-perience of the continuity of mind%moments! the possibility of a
full stop occurring becomes meaningless. 7t the moment of death of
the tangible body! the movement of intangible mind is followed by
another movement of mind & as has always been the case. This
movement of mind however! will be without the reference point of the
familiar physical body. )louds arise and dissolve in s0y mind
continually! and this movement is not limited by physicality. The
stream flows and is not limited by the landscape through which it
moves. t may be in a rich and verdant valley where it flows fast and
full. t may be tric0ling through limestone in an underwater cavern. t
may be struggling through a barren wasteland as a tiny remnant of its
former power. Movement of mind continues. 7fter the death of this
body however! these moments are e-perienced in connection with a
new and different physical form. This change can be frightening and
confusing for us to consider & but only because we have been so
fi-ated on associating our e-perience with a specific definition of
form. n our attachment to this specific form! we have forgotten that
mind does not depend on physicality. We often find change e-tremely
challenging & even within the conte-t of our everyday lives. t is not
surprising therefore! that the idea of change at such a radical level is
e-perienced as threatening and traumatic.
Teachings on death and rebirth describe a stage of disembodied
consciousness between death and rebirth called bardo
?
. *ardo means
'gap' or 'space'. '*ar' is a flow or stream! and 'do' is an intermediate
place or island in the stream. *etween the consciousness of the dying
physical being and the consciousness of the reborn physical being & a
dream%li0e state of consciousness is e-perienced! and this is called
*ardo. This is a disorientating or frightening e-perience if the
consciousness has had no e-perience of the empty nature of Mind.
Through attaching all e-perience to the sphere of our physicality! we
limit our awareness of the nature of Mind. When mind is free%flowing!
no longer connected to familiar physicality! we can feel lost and
disorientated. When we no longer have the conte-t of our physicality!
we can be overwhelmed! and e-perience fear and confusion in relation
to the intangible manifestation of disembodied consciousness.
Disembodied distraction is more potent and wild than embodied
distraction and we therefore can find it overwhelming. 'ventually the
power of our psychological patterning blows us li0e the wind! toward
habitual formulations in which we grasp at physicality as a secure
reference point. We become embodied and once again and begin the
process of identifying with physicality in which we ignore the nature
of e-istence as a stream of moments of emptiness! energy! and form.
?
Tib. Bar do! 40t. antarabhava
This is an e-treme simplification of the subtle process of dying! bardo!
and rebirth! but gives some idea of the principle of what 6ga0'chang
"inpoche describes as @. . .the continuity of beads of e-istence on the
thread of non%e-istence@ which is the same moment to moment as it is
life to life. f we have any feel for the e-periential sense of this
continuity! we can begin to grasp the importance of engaging in
spiritual practice. 7ny practice that hones awareness and the ability to
allow mind to be free in complete identification with the present
moment will be of immense benefit. Practice enables us to e-perience
40y mind! rather than remaining trapped in cloud mind with its
referential need to grasp at physical form. f we have not familiarised
ourselves with emptiness through spiritual practice! we continue our
referential addiction to form as the factor which defines our e-istence.
The direct e-perience of non%dual emptiness and form in the bardo is
overwhelming for the style of perception desperately see0ing form!
and therefore we miss the opportunity to see form and emptiness as
undivided.
/owever! if have confidence that the stream of my consciousness
will continue! need never be frightened of death. need not be
frightened because can recognise death as a natural process
occurring in each moment. can celebrate the fact that never need be
confused or overwhelmed by the process of death! once learn to e-ist
in the liberated spontaneity of the present moment. Then thoughts of
death can become a valuable incentive to engage in spiritual practice.
Death ma0es me aware of the necessity of gaining e-perience of the
nature of Mind and of presence
A
while in my physical form! in order to
retain this awareness through the process of dying! death! and rebirth.
can begin to practise by learning to remain aware during the
dissolution of wa0ing consciousness into sleep consciousness. f
0now how to retain awareness through the process of falling asleep!
dreaming and wa0ing! then stand a real chance of retaining a degree
of awareness through the more profound transition of falling into
death! e-periencing the dream%li0e state of the bardos between
rebirths! and wa0ing into a new physical being.
A
The word presence in this conte-t is used to denote na0ed! direct!
spontaneous awareness that is without distraction! distortion or dullness. t is
awareness that is vibrant and clear in the moment! without concern for past or
future.
To be aware through the process of death and dying means that
maintain awareness of the empty thread of my continuity. The endless
stream of present moments is the nature of our beginningless
enlightenment. retain memories & but do not manipulate them to
filter present e-perience. retain awareness of the love feel for
others & but do not convert it into a reference point to establish
e-istence. Presence is an unending stream of moments of potential
love and appreciation. '-isting in the present moment! can truly
0now myself. Bnowing myself in this way & without the limitation of
viewing my being as a singular isolated entity & can 0now others in a
new way. can e-perience relationships with other beings at the levels
of emptiness! energy! and form. can recognise the intrinsic!
beginningless nature%of%being of others and of myself. can appreciate
the multifarious manifestations that arise! without losing the
0nowledge of their intrinsic! beginningless empty nature. We can
0now and recognise one another in a totally e-pansive manner that
need never be lost.
mpermanence and death are not two separate concepts. 7ll form is
impermanent. 7ll form will die. 7ll form & from the chocolate bar you
=ust bought! to the idea in your head! the sensation of wind on your
s0in! the 4tatue of <iberty! the /imalayas! and the cells of your body &
they will all die. "eality is a continuing flu- of emptiness and form! of
arising and dissolving! of being born and dying. Death and
impermanence encompass ending! cessation! loss! change! evolution!
discontinuity! severance! consummation! termination! separation!
rupture! completion! arrival! culmination! and achievement. "ebirth
encompasses beginning! starting! change! evolution! inception!
0indling! birth! debut! conception! inspiration! invention! initiation!
embar0ation! origination! and precipitation.
mpermanence and death are the =oy of being. mpermanence and
death are the continuity of e-istence. /ow wonderful. /ow wonderful
that every moment is an opportunity for something new to arise. /ow
wonderful that the selfish moment in which =ust indulged can die!
and that a new moment of generosity can arise. /ow terrible 8not to
mention fundamentally impossible9 it would be if there were only
permanence and eternity. /ow terrible to be trapped in a particular
mind%moment forever. What endless suffering that would be. /ow
wonderful that a moment of appreciation cannot wither and lose its
spar0le by becoming fi-ed and permanent.
This sense of wonder reminds me of a poem by 6ga0'chang "inpoche
called 'Dharma Dogs in the Dregs( of Time' which deals with
appreciation and non%appreciation. include a couple of stan3as:
( dreg & the sediment in a li1uid; lees 8often in plural9; the basest or
least desirable portion 8often in plural9; a small amount; a residue
)h5gyam sighs: t really is rather sad. )h5gyam wishes that dogs
could become wolves.
Dog would really li0e to be wolf. Wolf is: free & has: dignity. /as:
fierce ga3e. /as unblin0ing eyes.
Wolf has: perfect sharp white teeth. /as: lu-urious bristling fur.
Wolf sings to the moonC
Wolf is: magnificentC *ut! & somehow & dogs never ma0e the
grade; never get to devour a sheep;
6ever nibble on an el0 or taste the por0y savour of precious human
rebirth.
)h5gyam 4its and watches the sad sight of sheep dog trials li0e a
horn%rimmed owl. & )h5gyam says:
This Mont *riac is wonderfulC This oa0y tannins of this
"avenswood Dinfandel are magnificentCE
)h5gyam says: F/ow splendid to taste flavoursC /ow delightful to
1uaff( the electricity of e-istenceC
*ut! how very sad! that all beings cannot share it & nowC /ow sad
to have some sort of integrity
*ut s1uander it on second%class postage stamps! and run after
stic0s as if they had some sort of & meaning.
( to drin0 8a li1uid9 heartily
ndeed. #/ow delightful to 1uaff the electricity of e-istenceC' With
appreciation cannot become so accustomed to this spar0ling moment
that fail to see it. /abitually we allow the people and ob=ects in our
lives to merge into the bac0ground sludge of indifference & once they
are familiar and we feel we can depend upon them being there. The
pleasure and e-citement felt climbing into the driving seat of the new
car diminishes over time. lose appreciation and find myself wishing
had bought a different model! or occupy myself deciding on the ne-t
vehicle. The wonder e-perienced as a child at the beauty of a
spectacular s0y! or the sensation of rain on my s0in! or the sting of
hail! may be lost as plod! head down on my way to wherever. 7
cynic once described life as 'Gne damn thing after another' & and so it
is when there is no appreciation. The warmth of melting into
delightful appreciation of my loved one may fade if ta0e their love
for granted and forget to fall in love with them every day. <ove is a
dance of communication and shared e-perience & its e-istence
depends on each arising moment of appreciation.
n AHHA Tra0tung "inpoche
I
visited the JB and gave teachings. When
tal0ing about our habitual fi-ation on form and inability to appreciate
in the present moment! he said that if we wo0e up one morning and
discovered that the grass was a different colour! we'd all race outside
and cry: FWowC <oo0 at thatC The grass is blueCE Whereas in fact we
could all ga3e outside in wonder every morning and say: FWowC <oo0
at thatC The grass is greenCE
I
Tra0tung "inpoche and his wife 7'd3om "inpoche are Ka=rayana masters
who reside in Michigan! J47. They have founded the Tsogyelgar
organisation of Ka=rayana practitioners.
f we consider the idea of an e-istence of permanence and eternity! it
becomes ridiculous. 7t which point would it become fi-ed? 7t
conception! one year! twenty! fifty? /ow could e-istence be fi-ed?
We would become fro3en in time and space. mpermanence and death
are the emptiness of form. mpermanence and death are change.
could reiterate the suggestions made in the chapter '40y Mind$ & of
life without emptiness as life without death and change. The food in
our gut would not brea0 down! but remain solid & forever. *reathing!
and circulation would cease because breathing in could not die to
allow breathing out to be born. We would only be able to see whatever
person or thing we happened to be loo0ing at in the moment that
dying stopped. There would be no more flow of communication as
one phrase died to allow the birth of the ne-t. We would not be able to
move! because the position we found ourselves in could not cease to
allow a new one to arise.
<ife%without%death would mean that it was always today and never our
birthday. The spring daffodils would remain resplendent! but the
summer roses would never grow and blossom. Gur children would not
be able to grow up and become independent! because their childhood
could not end. We could no longer en=oy music! as the sound of one
note could not die to allow the birth of the ne-t. The sic0 would be
trapped in their pain and infirmity without the promise of a cure! relief
and a better 1uality of life.
have always felt that impermanence and death are rather weighty
topics because of my personal history. was first drawn to attend a
*uddhist retreat by my inability to come to terms with the death of my
father and brother. Dwelling on death was something was trying to
avoid as felt it would add to my depression! rather than become a
reason for hope. <i0e myself! many people actively avoid thin0ing
about death and loss. >et avoidance does not change the fact of death
as reality. We are bombarded with e-amples of the many ways we can
die every time we watch the news or read a newspaper. War!
starvation! murder! cancer! car crashes! terrorist attac0s & so many
ways to die; so many ways to e-perience pain. We empathise with the
sufferers and their families. We e-perience the shoc0 of 0nowing that
this could easily happen to us. We feel helpless in the face of world
suffering.
n the face of death we feel small! vulnerable! and powerless & yet
these are simply facts of life and dwelling upon them will not ma0e it
better or worse. We cannot run away from death and impermanence
=ust because thin0ing of it frightens us. People die every moment of
every day. Things get lost or bro0en; events are concluded;
relationships end & impermanence happens every moment of every
day. This is inevitable because form is inherently impermanent. t is
the nature of form to move! change! arise and dissolve. *y the time
you finish reading this sentence! several people in the world will have
died. n fact appro-imately one person dies every H.L seconds & about
ten for every sentence in this boo0
+
. The end of what we conceive of
as 'life'! in the particular physical form we inhabit at the moment! is
definitely going to occur and we do not 0now when this will happen.
The only thing we can say about life with absolute certainty is that it
will end in our death.
+
4ource: Population Division of the Department of 'conomic and 4ocial
7ffairs of the Jnited 6ations 4ecretariat! World Population Prospects: The
AHHA "evision and World Jrbani3ation Prospects: The AHH? "evision!
http:MMesa.un.orgMunpp
When say goodbye to my loved ones as they set off to wor0 or
school do not 0now whether they will return. t is 1uite possible that
may never see them again. may die of a heart attac0 this day. They
may meet a fatal accident. These are sad and upsetting thoughts which
we usually try to avoid! because we do not li0e to thin0 of being
separated from our loved ones and this life coming to an end. may
try to avoid thin0ing such thoughts as much as possible! and find it
upsetting when circumstances ma0e this impossible. may find it
almost unbearable when forced to face my own mortality! or the
mortality of my loved ones. /owever! avoidance of the fact of death
does not change it any more effectively than thin0ing about it all the
time.
4ome people use that as a coping strategy. They thin0 about death a
great deal and rehearse scenarios of how it may be dealt with it.
found myself imagining losing my children when they were little.
These imaginings of what would happen if died! or about losing my
husband or one of the children dying! somehow made feel that had
gained some power over death and reduced its capacity to impact
upon me. #$m totally miserable thin0ing about death! so when it does
happen can$t be any more miserable than am now.$ /owever! the
reality of loss! illness! catastrophe! and death are never 1uite as we
imagine them to be! and living in what might be can be most
detrimental to what is. The fact is that death is certain and the time
and nature of death is un0nown.
We cannot effectively rehearse death! because our thoughts around
death always dwell in past or future. We thin0 of what might be or
loo0 at what has been. f thin0 about my father and feel sad for
things we were never able to share! am grieving for what might have
been. may imagine wal0s in the county together! or him playing with
his grandchildren! or seeing his pride in my achievments as an adult.
*ut all this is imaginary. t is natural to feel sorry for things we might
have shared and to miss him! but nothing of what we actually shared
together can ever be lost while still remember it.
7nother strategy to cope with thoughts of death may be to limit
ourselves to try to avoid opportunities for loss and death. 4o do not
engage in anything too adventurous and am overly protective of my
loved ones. re1uire statements of health and permanence from my
loved ones at increasingly fre1uent intervals in order to assure myself
of their security. may fly into a panic if my partner is =ust a few
minutes late coming home & after all! 0now what terrible things can
happen! have thought about them so often & perhaps one of those
awful imaginings has come to pass.
7lternatively! may continually challenge death. may flirt with
impermanence to demonstrate it holds no fear for me. Perhaps ta0e
up a high%ris0 activity! increasing the danger factor every time
succeed in flouting death. find a higher mountain to climb! or search
for a more difficult approach. n fact the closer come to death the
better! because then 0now am really safe! having survived. may
avoid close relationships so that never have loved ones to lose. try
to own as little as possible so that have hardly any possessions to
lose.
/owever! all strategies to embrace or avoid death! to actively cultivate
near%death situations or to attempt to dissolve the fear of death
through familiarity! involve avoidance of the uncertainty of the
moment of death. These strategies attempt to ma0e it nearly now or
nearly never! but cannot succeed in addressing actually now. When
the moment of death arises it will be now. The only preparation we
can engage in is to become accustomed to dwelling in now. f we are
so preoccupied with our fantasies of what might be and our
e-periences of what nearly was! we ignore what is.
The important thing to recognise is the present moment. f we are
alive in the present moment then past loss or future loss are irrelevant;
past potential moment of death and future potential moment of death
are also irrelevant. Whenever death occurs! be it in si-ty seconds time
or in si-ty years$ time! the moment of death will be now. t will
happen in the present moment & whenever that is. Gur e-perience of
death or loss will be felt in that present moment of time. t can never
be li0e anything rehearsed or imagined. t can only ever be a new!
fresh! uni1ue moment of now%ness! and the only preparation that can
help us is a familiarity with now%ness.
Many of our worries and fears around death and loss have to do with
what will be missed! what will never be achieved and e-perienced
because of death! and what pain and suffering may be e-perienced
around death. These worries and fears are pro=ections grounded in
previous e-perience or imagination. t is never possible for our ideas
about loss and death to be anything li0e the actual e-perience. can
only e-perience my death at the time it is happening. can only
e-perience the death of a loved one at the time it is happening. ris0
losing the =oy and happiness of life and living with my loved ones
through dwelling on death and loss. f am truly present in this
moment! there need never be regret or fear. f am truly loving and
appreciative of my dear ones in this moment! there can no be loss or
regret about what is. There will still be the pain of loss & this is
inevitable & but it will be pain without the stic0y complications of
regret or guilt! reproach or remorse. 'ach moment of time is the
reality of what is and to be present with those we love! and share
genuine present moments of love and companionship with them! is to
never need to feel regret or fear of their loss.
t is natural to feel sad and shoc0ed when a loved one dies! but any
regret and sadness we feel about their not being present in our future
is grounded in imagination. yearn and grieve for a future that never
e-isted. cry for a future that cannot be shared. This is not 'wrong'! but
is a hindrance to presence. When dwell too much on death and loss
through fear of my own death! or worry about the loss of loved ones!
limit my e-perience of the shared present moment because of the
pro=ection of my fear. When continually challenge my capacity to
face the reality of my own death and the loss of loved ones! limit my
e-perience of the present moment through self%obsession and an
inability to connect at a basic human level.
To live in the present moment is to balance the reality that it could be
our last moment of life with the understanding that it is also the basis
of the ne-t moment of life. This attitude affords an opportunity to
view each moment as the precious last moment of e-perience! and
also as the precious seed of new e-perience. We can let go of
limitations we impose upon ourselves because of a pro=ected future!
whilst also en=oying the moment as the ground of a possible future.
We can let go! but also appreciate. We can be free and spontaneous.
We can engage with the death and birth of the present moment & the
emptiness and form of the present moment.
When harbour grudges or resentment towards people! am not living
in the present moment. am living in a conceptual construct that
have created myself. am mediating my e-perience of now. Through
this conceptual construct 0eep resurrecting the e-perience of the hurt
have suffered. feel that must protect myself from a pro=ected
future where this person may hurt me again. fail to engage with the
uni1ue unrepeatable present moment of potential en=oyment and
appreciation with that person because of my pro=ection. =ustify my
emotion! because the pro=ection of maintaining it into a future moment
ma0es me feel substantial and secure. feel that through holding on to
a past emotional memory! can protect myself in a future situation. t
is as if am attempting to pro=ect a substantial sense of myself into the
future through hoarded emotion. This feeling of substantiality
insulates me from the emptiness of letting go of my emotion in the
present. Through holding on to my emotion by generating concepts!
miss out on the potential of the present moment that can only be fully
engaged from the perspective of its imminent loss. Through attaching
to the illusion of security gain by holding on to a past hurt! lose the
possibility of e-periencing open%hearted =oy and appreciation in the
present.
The remembered past is already lost. The future could be a rewarding!
loving relationship with the person who has hurt me. 7t some point
have to let go of the grudge if wish to have a continuing! pleasant
relationship with them. Whenever am able to let go of the grudge it
will be now. 4o why not ma0e this moment the now moment.
f we grasp the importance of complete identification with the present
moment! then the notion of impermanence as something about which
we need to be sad or discouraged starts to seem nonsensical. Present
moments are infinite. They will never end. The arising of present
moments is eternal and will never end. t is the latching on to the
content of a particular moment of remembered past or imagined
future! to the detriment of the current moment that causes us
problems.
Gnce we are able to view death and impermanence simply as loss of
the present moment! a great deal of energy can be liberated. We can
discover the energy of the flow of the stream. t may be that our
'present moments' are rather 'clumpy' to begin with. We have the
#present moment$ of this meeting! or this argument! or this day or this
evening. <et us imagine have an hour%long meeting with someone
feel does not li0e me. This hour is my clump of #present moment$.
attempt to approach my interaction with the person as if it is the last
hour will ever see them! have any association with them! or have
them e-ert any influence on my life. also approach the meeting as if
it was our first ever meeting! new and fresh! and the basis for many
future meetings. From the perspective of a last%ever meeting! may
not care what they thin0 of me and feel free to be spontaneous; may
let go of past e-periences of them because they cannot affect my
future; may decide that the important thing is to be nice to them now
because there will never be another opportunity. From the perspective
of a first meeting that will be the basis of future meetings! may feel
free to be spontaneous because this person 0nows nothing about me;
may be careful to listen and hear their point of view to ensure a basis
of understanding for the future; may delight in the opportunity to
meet someone new and appreciate their individuality.
t does not matter whether succeed or fail. t does not matter whether
the person is totally unreasonable and nasty to me. have no past to
hold on to! or future to pro=ect. When the meeting is over it is over!
and the ne-t time we meet can approach it in the same way. This
might sound an e-traordinary thing to do at first. #*ut they were
horrible to me!$ splutter. # have to remember that in case they are
horrible to me ne-t time. have to protect myself.$ There is nothing to
protect e-cept memory and pro=ection. The ne-t time meet that
person will be a new! fresh present moment opportunity & unless
decide to approach it from the perspective of protecting a remembered
#me$ pro=ected into the present moment.
7s we become familiar with viewing impermanence in this way and
embracing the present moment! our mind%moment e-periences can
become less clumpy. We can start to develop awareness in every
actual mind%moment. 7t first we e-perience presence in a clumsy!
artificial way li0e the flic0ering frames of an old blac0 and white
movie. We continually attempt to apply awareness to our e-perience
and arise with presence! so that we can act from the liberated energy
of spontaneity rather than the stilted constriction of e-pectation and
anticipation. We stutter through periods of loss of presence! awareness
of presence! loss of presence! awareness of presence... 2radually our
ability to dwell in the present moment develops and our e-perience of
present awareness becomes smoother and less stuttering. 'ventually
our ability to dwell in the present becomes complete. Then our
e-perience of presence emerges with the flow and brilliance of a ID
holographic Technicolor super%movie.
The nature of be%ing is impermanence and death! as much as it is
living. To read the ne-t chapter! the reading of this chapter has to die.
This is something to be wondered at! en=oyed! and embraced. To be
offered a method which teaches us how to dwell in the presence of
each moment is an e-traordinary opportunity! so rare and precious.
Turn your mind to the thought of the opportunity offered by
impermanence and death & and =oyfully! enthusiastically practise.
mpermanence is a cause for celebration. mpermanence is our
opportunity to discover presence. Present moments are infinite. They
will never end. We will never cease to have opportunities to start
again. We will never cease to have opportunities to e-perience
presence. We will always have the opportunity for this moment to be
the moment when we dwell in presence. The hate and anger of the
past moment is gone! over! lost forever and never need be revisited.
The potential for love and appreciation in the present moment can
never be destroyed! and leads into another moment of potential love
and appreciation. /ow wonderfulC
Gnce get a feeling for living in the present moment can be
whatever wish to be. can dissolve the mind that constrains the
present with concepts of the past. can let go of the churning over of
remembered moments that feign permanence through arrogated( re%
living. can dissolve the mind that wishes to influence the future
through pro=ection of e-pectation! to feign permanence through
arrogate fantasy. do not have to be defined by who was in the last
moment! or who thin0 might be in the ne-t. f wa0e up in a bad
mood! can simply allow that mood to die and allow a good mood
moment to be born. can shout the yogic syllable '/a' to e-plode the
bad%mood%mind%moment and be reborn in good%mood%mind%moment.
am liberatedC am free to be 0ind%mind%moment%person! ecstatic%
mind%moment%person! and brave%mind%moment%person. f am
unfortunate to be e-periencing sadness in my life! 0now that sad%
mind%moment%person is only a temporary definition! and that it can
and will change. am free of permanent definition. Bnowing the
emptiness of present mind%moment can fully en=oy its form.
'n=oying the form of present mind%moment! can be ecstatic in the
understanding of its emptiness.
( to arrogate & to claim or sei3e without =ustification N<atin arrogareO
Puestioner: .oy and appreciation die too . . .?
6ga0ma 6or'd3in: t is interesting that we have a different relationship
with death and impermanence depending on whether we$re tal0ing
about something we li0e or something we don$t li0e. When we see =oy
and appreciation naturally dissolve! we fear they will never arise
again. When we see pain and sorrow naturally dissolve! we fear they
will be bac0 to trouble us again 1uite soonC .oy and appreciation in the
present moment can be followed by =oy and appreciation in the ne-t
present moment. There is no need to fear its natural dissolution. t can
always arise again.
P: Gh see & yes can see how we do that.
66: 'ach mind moment can be =oy and appreciation! but not if we
cling to its dissolution. f we cling to that moment of dissolving! and
try and grab the =oy and appreciation to 0eep it with us! we have lost
the reality of =oy and appreciation and clung to a concept of it. Gur
lives could be a stream of continually arising and dissolving moments
of =oy and appreciation.
P: 'arlier on you tal0ed about seeing ourselves as emptiness! energy!
and form. /ow does energy fit in with the death of the body?
66: 'nergy is intangible manifestation. t is the subtle body of
consciousness. When physical form dies! we e-perience the energy of
being more potently and vividly than usual! and this can be a
frightening e-perience if we have no view to allow us to understand it.
f mind is li0e a wild elephant! we e-perience this as the turmoil of
consciousness without physicality. *ardo can be something of a
nightmare e-perience. 'ven if we see pleasant images! we still may
feel lost! confused! and desperate for form.
P: What about 0illing yourself to e-perience death?
66: What do you thin0?
P: N<aughterO 0now it$s not a good idea & it was =ust something that
occurred to me.
66: 7lways worth as0ing NlaughsO. 4uicide is a highly negative act if
you have not practised sufficiently to have gained control of the death
process. There were <amas in Tibet who committed suicide through
Phowa because they 0new that death by e-ecution or through torture
would not enable them to maintain awareness of the death process. f
we cannot e-perience awareness in the dream state! then it is unli0ely
that we will e-perience awareness in the bardo state. f we cannot
maintain awareness into sleep! through dreaming! and into wa0ing!
then we stand little chance of maintaining awareness through the more
profound e-perience of death! bardo! and birth. For those of us who
have not developed such practice! the state of mind at the moment of
death is important. Dying with a happy mind is beneficial.
P: s that li0e if you go to sleep after an argument! still feeling all
cross and churned up! you might have nightmares or at least unsettled
sleep?
66: >es! that's right. The best way to ensure a happy mind at death is
to have a happy mind all the time! as we don't 0now when death will
occur.