The complete marriage ceremony and the rituals are mentioned here.

Preparations for the betrothal

day
Betrothal is a very auspicious day where the parents of the perspective bride and groom actually meet.
Feasts and gifts are shared between the two families. One thing is always seen that all gifts are in even
numbers. This way, they are officially engaged. After the meeting on betrothal, both families make the
formal announcement of the wedding date. This is done by giving wedding cakes with the invitations.
These baked cakes are of different styles and flavors.
Wedding dowry
Though dowry is banned in various parts of the world, yet it is highly practiced in Chinese culture. In it,
bride's family prepares the dowry to be given to the groom's family. It is mostly composed of items of
daily necessities. In ancient times, girls used to learn needle work in their very young age. With this art,
they used to prepare shoes, table cloth and socks, etc. These all used to be a part of her dowry. Dowry
is to be sent a few days before the wedding. The groom's family then invites some female relative or
friend who has to set the bed of the bride.
Wedding Decorations
Wedding decorations start from decorating the the bridal house and the wedding site. It is done by using
a lot of banners and other such arrangements. Red is considered the best color in such decorations.
Various lovely poems are written on these banners. Some people also write wishes for the newly wed
couple.
The final day - Wedding Day
Morning starts with the hair dressing ritual. It is done by a woman who has living parents, spouse and
children. This woman while tying up the hair of the bride say some auspicious traditional words. Similar
rituals are performed in groom's family too. These rituals mean that both bride and groom are entering
into their adulthood.
The importance of door game
Door game is played when the groom tries to enter the bride's home. He is prohibited from entering the
door by the friends of bride. It is symbolic game that says that the bride is a very lovely girl and people
from her family and friends do not want to marry her away. They all ask questions about the bride from
the groom. This is a test to check whether the groom really cares about her bride. The groom will try to
enter by presenting a token money.
Bridesmaid holds a red umbrella over the head of the bride when she finally goes out to ascend the car.
Other people of her family scatter rice, red and green beans on her. The red umbrella is used because it
is considered that it will protect the bride from any kind of evil spirit. The rice and beans are used to
attract the attention of the gold chicken.
When the bridal sedan arrives at the groom's home, there are firecrackers and music all across. She is
welcomed with gongs and drums. The bride then leaps over an iron basin with lit charcoal inside. This
ritual is also very important. It is done to bring prosperity into her life and to keep evils away from her.
Tea ceremony
This is an official ritual where the newlyweds bow three times. They bow to the heaven and earth, to the
ancestral tablets and their parents. In the last, they bow to each other. Then the bride presents tea to all
the family members. In return all these people give her some gifts. Gifts may be in the form of jewelry or
money. Then the wedding proceeds to the banquet venue.
Chinese wedding food
Some common food served in Chinese weddings include fish, roast suckling pig, chicken, pigeon and
lobster etc. It also includes desert bun stuffed with lotus seeds. Food also denotes different things in
Chinese culture. For example, whole roast suckling pig is a symbol of the purity of the bride. Similarly,
pigeon implies peaceful future for both of them.
Wedding dress
One thing you must have noticed, that red color is used the most. It is preferred because it is considered
very lucky color. It also helps to drive away all evil spirits. The brides from northern China usually wear
one-piece frock. It has gold and silver designs on it. On the other side, brides from southern China wear
two-piece dress having golden phoenix and dragon on it. In some cultures, a piece of red veil is used to
cover the face of the bride during the wedding ceremony. It is considered that the newlyweds would see
the face of each other for the first time on their wedding night.
These days, brides change their dresses at least 3 times on the wedding day. Firstly white wedding
gown is worn. At the tea ceremony, traditional bridal dress would be worn. Before the end of the
banquet, brides have to change their dress and wear cocktail dress.
Chinese wedding night ritual
The room of the bride and groom is decorated with dragon and phoenix candles. The newlyweds drink
wine from two cups. These cups are tied together with a red string. This is the formal wedding vow in
Chinese culture. Then the groom offers boiled half raw dumplings to the bride. Raw dumplings imply
family prosperity.
Post-wedding customs
All customs do not end with marriage. Some are even performed after the marriage. The very next
morning of the wedding, bride gets up early. She prepares the meal for the whole family. It is a symbol
that she is well nurtured. After some days, mostly three days the couple visits the bride's parents.
This way, the complete marriage in Chinese culture is performed. There are a of lot many customs and
rituals that are area specific. These have their own implications and accordingly they are performed.

http://www.weddingclan.com/chinese-wedding.html


Chinese Wedding Customs
The summary below is an illustration of one of the many variations of Chinese wedding customs.
Depending on the geographical regions of both the bride and groom families, the social status and
wealth of both families, you may find significant differences of practices that you might have heard or
encountered. This is by no means a scholarly work, but an attempt by the author to illustrate an example
of traditional Chinese practice. Readers should consider this while enjoying the interpretation.

Wedding Preparation Events

Engagement or Intention to Marry
Elaborate Gift Presentations Betrothal
Chinese Wedding Date Selection
Chinese Wedding Invitations
New Bed
Gift Presentation just before the wedding
Wedding Day

Fetch the Bride
Tea Ceremony
Dinner Banquet
Engagement or Intention to Marry

Similar to the western culture, Chinese wedding is considered as a union of two families. Once the bride
and groom decide to get married or engaged, they should share the news with the parents.

Traditionally, Chinese marriages were pre-arranged by the parents, just like most of the other ancient
cultures. When the grooms parents identified a possible daughter-in-law, they would send a middleman
(usually a married woman) to present proposal gifts to the girls parents. If the proposal was well-
received by the girls parents, the middleman would obtain the girls birth date to be sent back to the
grooms family.

The grooms family would place the birth date on the ancestral altar for three days. If there was no
disaster or loss of property to the family during the three days, the grooms parents would give the
grooms birth date to the middleman to be brought to the girls parents, who would also go through the
same process.

At the same time, both parents would also consult their astrological experts for their advise on the
potential match. Only when the outcomes were favorable, the parents would proceed with the next
phase gift presentation betrothal.

However, in the modern world, most Chinese parents no longer pre-arrange marriage for their children.
You can seldom find this practice in North America.

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Elaborate Gift Presentations Betrothal

With the announcement shared to both parents, the two parents will then proceed with their discussions
on gift presentation from the grooms parents to the brides parents.

Most of the time, the gifts will be presented in form of both food and money. The food items include tea
leaves, dragon-phoenix cakes (a specific type of Chinese cake), a pair of male and female poultry,
sweetmeats, sugar, wine and tobacco. With tea leaves being the most essential item, symbolizing
wishes from the grooms family to the new couple for as many children and descendants as the tea
leaves.

`The dragon-phoenix cakes can mostly be found only in Chinatown area. For convenience, a lot of
Chinese in North America have adopted the custom of using cake coupons in place of actual cakes.
This practice has gained much popularity through the years and is the preferred way of presentation in
the Chinese community. These cake coupons can be purchased from most Chinese bakeries with
monetary value of $10. Purchase discount is usually available on these cake coupons when you buy in
bulk. For example, 20% off regular price for more than 100 cards. These cake cards will be sent along
with the invitation cards that the brides family sends to their relatives and friends as their announcement
and invitation to the upcoming marriage feast.
Several days after the presentation of gifts from the grooms family, the brides family can send gifts of
food and simple clothing/accessories to the grooms family. The gifts include practical items such as
fruits, key chain and coin purse.
Upon presentation(s) of the gifts, the two families proceed to prepare for the wedding.
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Chinese Wedding Date Selection


Up to now, the wedding date is still jointly selected by both parents. The grooms parents usually take
the lead to select a few good dates, then consult the brides parents who will determine the final date
among those selected ones. Good dates are usually determined based on the Chinese Almanacs
(Tong Shu).
The almanacs consists of predictions of luck, based on Chinese beliefs and interpretations, for the entire
calendar year. They are usually available in early October for next years almanacs. They are usually
printed in red cover and available in major Chinese book stores. Unfortunately, only Chinese version is
available. There is no English publication as of yet.
Chinese Wedding Invitations
Wedding invitations (both the invitation itself and the envelope) is preferred to be printed on red paper.
In Chinese culture, red is the color for happiness. White or blue is not recommended as they are colors
usually used in another occasion. A lot of Chinese people still follow the same traditional use of red, at
the same time, there are more and more Chinese who has chosen to use other colors.
New Bed

In Chinese culture, the newly weds need to sleep in a brand new bed after they got married. New bed
contains an innocent connotation that neither the bride or the groom were ever married newly
married. This new bed is usually bought by the grooms family, and beddings by the brides
family. After its delivered and set up before the wedding, this bed cannot be slept or sat on by
anybody except babies and children. In fact, traditional culture would ask babies or children to
crawl on the bed for a short while. This practice symbolizes wishes for many more children to
come. There is no specific restriction or practice on the type or color of bed that should be
chosen.
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Gift Presentation Just Before The Wedding
A few days before the wedding, the brides parents send their gifts to the bride and groom. This
time, the gifts should include beddings of the new bed. The bedding list includes an essential
bed comforter with a dragon-phoenix design as well as two Red Envelopes to be placed
underneath the bed. Unfortunately, these dragon-phoenix bed comforter can only be found in
Chinatown even nowadays. A Red envelope is a red envelope with money stuffed inside. The
amount of money that should be put in each envelope is flexible, as long as it has a 9 ending.
For example, $9 or $19 or $299. Nine stands for long-lasting in Chinese culture as it rhymes
with the long-lasting meaning. The red envelopes are available in most Chinese bookstores in
China Town.
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Fetch the Bride
On the wedding day, the groom and groomsmen will decorate the wedding car and drive to the
brides house where they will fetch the bride. (This is unlike the western culture where the bride
will arrive at the church by herself.)
At the brides house door, the bridesmaids (and wedding helpers) will play games with the
groom and groomsmen before letting them into the house. These games usually involve asking
the groom questions about the bride to demonstrate how well he knows her, doing push-ups to
show his strength and singing songs to declare his love for the bride. The groomsmen are
responsible to help the groom to pass all games.
At the end of the games, the groom will present a red envelope with money to the bridesmaids
(and wedding helpers) and will thank everybody for letting him fetch the bride. The total amount
chosen will have a 9 ending. For example, $99, $199 or $299 depending on the number of
bridesmaids (and wedding helpers) who have been invited. The groom and groomsmen will then
proceed into the house.
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Tea Ceremony
On the wedding day, the bride serves tea to her parents, as a token of appreciate for the love and
care that her parents have given her. The tea (regular Chinese tea) is served in a tea cup with a
tea saucer. The bride serves it using both hands. This tea ceremony is done before the bride
leaves the house and is usually not too elaborate.
On the other hand, the tea ceremony to the grooms family takes place after the wedding
ceremony and is much more elaborate. The tea to the grooms family include lotus seeds and
two red dates. The lotus seeds together with the red dates symbolize early arrival of children
from the newly weds.
The newly weds knee in front of the parents when they serve this tea. A lucky woman will help
the newly weds to make the tea, hand the tea to the newly weds, who will then serve it to the
grooms parents. The grooms parents will return Red Envelopes to the newly weds, usually
consist of either money or jewelery. A red envelope (with money) will also be given to the lucky
woman when each cup of tea is served.
This is repeated for each of the older family members as respect to them. Tea is usually not
served to the younger brothers and sisters of the family, instead a hug or hand-shake will
usually be done.
When these teas are served, the woman stands on the left side and the man stands on the right
side. For example, the groom will be kneeing in front of his mom and the bride will be kneeing in
front of the grooms dad.
Nowadays, many times, both the bride and groom will serve tea to the brides parents and family
members in the brides house before they leave for the wedding ceremony. After the ceremony,
they will go to the grooms house and serve tea to the grooms parents and family members. The
red envelopes usually consist of $10-20 each. Jewelery can be watches or necklaces. Some
traditional parents have their son and daughter knee before them to serve tea, other more
modern parents have their children stand before them to serve tea.
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Dinner Banquet
Up till now, Chinese dinner banquet is still the most respected ritual of all. The highlight of the
banquet is when the newly wed, along with their immediate families, going around the restaurant
and making a toast with every guest. The path of this toast can start from the left or right side of
all the guest tables, but do not turn back in the path.
Another tradition that is usually still carried out during the banquet is for the groom to carry the
bride around all the guest tables. This symbolizes the promise from the groom to take care of the
bride for the rest of their lives.
http://traditionalchinesewedding.com/#L1

Double Happiness: Each half of the symbol is the standard character for happiness, written "hsi"
or "xi," and pronounced something like "she" in Mandarin (high level tone ; the first tone).
Therefore, two "hsi" graphs together represents the wish for the two young newlyweds to have
happiness together. The double happiness graph (pronounced "shuang-hsi" in Mandarin) is a
special Chinese character used for marital happiness. Its not used in regular Chinese writing or
printing. (Source: Chris Jochim, Comparative Religious Studies Program, San Jose State
University, San Jose, CA)

Selecting an Auspicious Wedding Date:
Auspicious days are subject to interpretation by fortune tellers that perform the analysis based
on ones birth date (day and hour) after consultation with the Chinese almanac. Almanacs
containing predictions for the entire year are sold at the beginning of the Lunar New Year by
street vendors and in book stores. These paperback books are approximately two inches thick
with a wealth of information about Chinese beliefs. It is said to be the oldest continuous
publication known. Different versions are published in Taiwan, Hong Kong and mainland China,
but unfortunately an English version is not available.
In the Chinese community it is considered bad form if an individual consults the almanac and
performs a self analysis. That is why a fortune teller or Fung Suey [Feng Shui] expert is
consulted. They usually can also provide horoscope information in advance of the publication of
the almanac.
The 15 day period from the middle to the end of the seventh lunar month is considered
inauspicious because that is time of the Hungry Ghost Festival when the gates of Hell are
opened and the lost spirits are allowed to wonder the earth. They should not be invited to your
wedding! http://www.chcp.org/wedding.html Jochim, Christian. Chinese Religions: A Cultural
Perspective. Englewood Cliffs, NY: Prentice-Hall, Inc., 1986.