The Crockers New Move

Screenplay by Mackenzie Detwiler and Marlinna Estlow

Scene 1 Act 1
Eugene, Betty, Bernie, and their dog Walter enter the stage.Go into the Crockers house
in the afternoon. (Stage Left)
Eugene

BETTY! I thought I told you to clean up this mess! Im sick and tired of walking
through this dirty house.
Eugene points at a pile of dirty clothes on the floor.
Betty
Dad I swear that wasnt me! Bernie you brat! Go clean it up!
Eugene
Your mother will be home soon, and I highly doubt shell appreciate what you two did to
the living room.
Bernie
For heavens sake dad stop yelling at us, we just got home two minutes ago.
Betty
Bernie, stop making excuses. We all know you were the one that did it.
Eugene
Well thats the last time you will be out, anyways, you guys should start getting
ready...school starts next week.
Betty & Bernie
UGH!!!!
Eugene leaves the room.
Bernie
Betty what is your problem? Whyd you rat me out?
Betty
Sorry but Im not going to clean up your nasty mess. Im always stuck taking the blame
for you.
Bernie
If you help me clean it up, Ill give you my chocolate bar.
Betty
Deal!
Betty and Bernie bend down to pick up the clothes..

Bernie throws clothes into hamper.

Walter barks as if singing
They hear a knock on the front door and get up to answer it. (Downstage Right)
Bernie opens door.
Bernie
Hey, Aunt Franny!
Aunt Franny
Hi girls! Can I come in for a second?
Betty
Sure, whats up?
Franny enters and closes door behind her. They all sit down on the couch.
Aunt Franny
So, I met a guy.
Betty
What is his name?!
Aunt Franny
His name is Justin
She blushes
Bernie
And!?!?
Aunt Franny
And he asked me to dinner!!!
Betty
Oh my gosh! When?!
Aunt Franny
Tonight! So could you girls do me a huge favor and watch Winona for the night? I can
pick her up tomorrow morning.

Betty
Sure! Have fun on your date!
Aunt Franny hands Winona and a diaper bag to Bernie and leaves stage through door.

Bernie
Okay Betty, I have to pack my stuff for school next week. You watch Winona.
Betty
No way! She bites!
Bernie
Betty I had to watch her last time! Stop cutting me off short!
Betty
Give her here, but hurry up. Im not doing this all day.
Betty
Oh my gosh okay, so what do you want to do Winona?
Winona
I WANT PLAY WIF DOGGY!!
Betty
Oh Walter!!!
Walter comes running into the room and jumps onto Winona, knocking her over.
Winona begins to cry.
Betty
Walter!!! Bad dog! Winona are you okay? Walter go away!
Walter runs into another room
Winona
DOGGY MEAN!
Bernie
Hes just playing, hes a big puppy he plays rough..

Betty
You are going to be fine Winona, she just startled you.
Bernie
Winona what would you like to do instead?
Winona
ME TIRED..
Betty
Would you like to take a nap?
Winona shakes her head yes.
Betty & Bernie walk her to their room and lay her down.

Act 1 Scene 2
Winona starts crying
Betty
Bernie!!! Go take care of Winona!!!
Bernie
Betty its your turn!!!
They go and Betty changes her diaper
Bernie
Betty school starts in 2 days. We dont even have our schedules!
Betty and Bernie scream
Eugene and Margie enter the stage.
Eugene
Morning girls, your mother and I got your schedules in the mail today.
Bernie
Oh thank goodness, I was getting worried. We were just talking about it.

Margie
What is Winona doing here? Is Aunt Franny around?
Betty
Aunt Franny got asked on a date! We are watching Winona for her.
Margie
Oh that garsh dang lady. Always leaving Winona around.
Margie begins to sing Trouble.
Margie
Right
I shoulda known you were bad news
from the bad boy demeanor and the tattoos
cause most guys only want one thing
but Im undecided, tryna figure out if thats you
either way though, I think youre worth a test drive
Cause (ooh) you're so much better than the next guy
And a little trouble only makes for a good time
So all the normal red flags be a good sign
Don't you come here thinking you're ballin'
Ain't down for it
You seem like trouble to me
I can tell by the way that you lean
And the way that you kiss your teeth
And you turn up so fresh and clean
Smells like trouble to me
Opposites attract, I guess this it that
Good girl, bad guy what a perfect match
And if we ooo, you're gon' want to pay back tithes
Cuz when you finish you gon' feel like you was baptized
See baby now you fiendin' for a test drive
Cuz you don't wanna lose your ride to the next guy
And baby trouble only makes for a good time
So all the normal red flags be a good sign
Don't you come here thinking you're ballin'
Ain't down for it
You seem like trouble to me
I can tell by the way that you lean

And the way that you kiss your teeth

And you turn up so fresh and clean
Smells like trouble to me
I got it bad for him in the worst way
Dear Lord, how'd I get in this position and
I shoulda have never got involved in the first place
But second place never get the recognition, hmm
See what he doin' to me make have to shout it out
Got a hold on me, that's without a doubt
So clear now that he's a trouble starter
But I ain't a saint neither and these ain't no still waters, hmm
Just cause all the girls are falling at your feet
Don't mean no thing to me
Till you show me where it's at
Smells like trouble to me
Just cause all the girls are falling at your feet
Don't mean no thing to me
Till you show me where it's at
Smells like trouble to me
I shoulda known you were bad news (oo oo oo, knew you were bad news)
From the bad boy demeanor and the tattoos (oo oo oo, all of the tattoos)
I shoulda known you were bad news (oo oo oo, knew you were bad news)
But I'm undecided tryna figure out if that's you (oo oo oo, trouble to me)
Don't you come here thinking you're ballin'
Ain't down for it
You seem like trouble to me
I can tell by the way that you lean
And the way that you kiss your teeth
And you turn up so fresh and clean
Smells like trouble to me
Trouble ends.
Bernie
Dear lord mother, shell be back soon. Chill out.
Margie groans and exits stage with Winona.
Bettys phone rings, and she answers it.
Betty
Hello?
Karmen

Betty! Heyyy!! Did you get your schedule?

Bernie and Eugene begin putting dishes away.
Betty
Yeah! Come over and we can see if we have any classes together!
Karmen
On my way!!
Betty puts down the phone.

Eugene
Whos coming over?
Betty
Karmen. We want to look at our schedules, plus I havent seen her in forever.
Bernie
Bettyyyy! Karmen is soo annoying!
Betty
Youll get over it.
Bernie
Dad! Can I have Evian over?
Eugene
I guess so, but dont wake Winona.
Bernie calls Evian to ask her to come over.
Karmen and Evian come to the door
Bernie
Hey Evian!!!!
Betty
Hey Karmen!!!!
Evian
Hey Bernie!!!!

Karmen
Hey Betty!!!!
Winona starts to cry
Betty
Bernie, you can go take care of Winona this time
Bernie
I did it the last time Betty, its your turn!
Betty
Oh my god, no I did it?
Margie
Girls quit arguing and just do it together.
Betty
Mom. make Bernie do it!!!
Margie
I said no complaining and just do it, you guys are the ones who volunteered to do it in
the first place.
Aunt Franny walks in the door
Bernie & Betty
Thank gosh youre here!!!!
Margie
Francesca, why did you leave Winona here with just these two girls. Apparently they are
not responsible enough.
Aunt Franny
Im sorry I didnt think that itd be that big of a problem.
Bernie
Mom its not even you who is taking care of her , so why do you even care?
Betty
Yeah, mind your own business Mom!

Margie
Excuse me Betty?! Go to your room right now!
Betty
But I have Karmen over Mom!!
Margie
Sorry Karmen, but right now just isnt a good time. I think itd be best if youd leave.
Karmen
Okay, I am sorry for bothering you.
Evian
Does that mean that I should leave too?
Margie
Yes, I am sorry maybe you girls can stop by tomorrow?
Karmen & Evian
Yeah that sounds nice. Goodbye everyone!
They walk out of the house.
Bernie
Mom that wasnt even fair!
Betty
Seriously Mom, you are so annoying!
Betty and Bernie storm out of the room and slams her bedroom door.

Act 1 Scene 3
Reset stage for school.
Braxton, Betty, Bernie, Evian, Karmen, and Arnold enter stage.
Braxton
Hey guys!! Hows your first day going?
Bernie
Hey Braxton! Nice seeing you again.

Betty
Our day is going pretty good, how about you?
Braxton
Same here. Well I gotta run. Catch yah later!
Braxton walks down the hall
Arnold
That guy is such a ladies man.
Bettie & Bernie
BRAXTON IS SO ADORABLE!!!! He is soo perfect!!
Evian
Hey Arnold can you help me with my locker?
Arnold
You sure you want me to do it? Or does Braxton need to come back and help you.
(Sarcastically)
Evian
I dont even think hes that attractive.
Betty
Are you kidding me? How are we even friends??
Bernie
Laughing. Come on Betty we have to go find our locker.
Betty and Bernie leave the stage.
Arnold
What is with those two? Braxton is stupid.
Evian
I dont know. Cmon Arnold lets get to class.
Everyone walks away
Betty and Bernie reenter stage

Bernie
Hey Betty, there is Braxton over there at his locker!!
Betty
Is our locker near his?
Bernie
whispers intensely. OH MY GOSH BETTY HIS LOCKER IS RIGHT BESIDE OURS!!!!!
Braxton
Hey guys what are you up to?
Betty
We were finding our locker. Guess we will be together all year!!
Braxton
Oh cool! Well, I better head to 1st period. See yah!
Betty & Bernie
Bye Braxton!!!
Betty
Come on Bernie we have to get to first period. I think we have math.
Betty and Bernie exit.

Act 1 Scene 4
First Period math class- School setting with Betty, Bernie, Owen, Ellis, Karmen, Evian,
and Mr. Gravy and others.
Bell rings. Students get into seats.
Mr. Gravy
Good morning everyone! Welcome to tenth grade Geometry. Lets start off by sharing a
few things about ourselves.
Mr Gravy looks at seating chart.
Mr. Gravy
Lets see, Owen? You can start us off.

Owen stands up.

Owen
Um, hi. My name is Owen. I play competitive chess, and I won the Grand Championship
just this summer.
Mr. Gravy
Oh wow! How exciting. You may sit down now.
Owen sits down.
Mr. Gravy
Lets see, Ellis?
Ellis stands up.
Ellis
Yo. Im Ellis. I skateboard basically 24-7, I would say Im pretty chill.
Mr. Gravy
Oh, how interesting!
Ellis sits down.
Mr. Gravy
Ah yes, Bernie and Betty?
Bernie and Betty stand up. Betty trips over her shoelace and they fall, knocking over
their desk.
Owen
Woah, here grab my hand!
Owen helps Betty and Bernie get up, students in classroom laughing.
Mr. Gravy
Ok, settle down everyone. You girls may speak now.
Betty
Wow how embarrassing, um Im Betty, and this is my sister Bernie. Instead of standing
here talking, we would like to just sing you a song.

Mr.Gravy
Okay! Then lets get started.
Betty and Bernie begin to sing We are Siamese.
Betty and Bernie
We are Siamese if you please
We are Siamese if you don't please
We are from a residence of Siam
There is no finer cat than I am
Do you see that thing swimming round and round
Maybe we can reach on in and make it drown
If we sneaking up upon it carefully
There will be head for you and a tail for me
We are Siamese if you please
We are Siamese if you please
Now we're looking over our new domisile
If we like we stay for maybe quite a while
We are Siamese if you please
We are Siamese if you don't please
We are from a residence of Siam
There is no finer cat than I am
Do you hear what I hear a baby cry
Where we finding baby there's milk near by
And if we look in baby buggy there could be
Plenty of milk for you and also some for me
We are Siamese if you please
We are Siamese if you please
Now we're looking over our new domisile
If we like we stay for maybe quite a while
We are Siamese if you please
We are Siamese if you don't please
We are from a residence of Siam
There is no finer cat than I am

We are Siamese if you please

We are Siamese if you don't please
We are from a residence of Siam
There is no finer cat than I am
We are Siamese if you please
We are Siamese if you don't please
We are from a residence of Siam
There is no finer cat than I am
Betty and Bernie bow & then sit down.
Mr. Gravy
That was great girls! Thank you! You may sit down now.
Mr. Gravy
So, we are going to go ahead and get started today. Let me put you in your assigned
seats.
Ellis
YO!! Why we gotta have assigned seats?!
Bernie & Betty
It will be fine anyways Ellis, because he will put us in Alphabetical order and we have
close last names.
Ellis
Oh okay.
Mr. Gravy
Yeah girls, dont worry I think youll like your new seats.
The bell rings and students exit the room, except Owen, Ellis, Betty and Bernie.
Owen
Wow, that was so good.
Ellis
Yeah guys, that was like, super chill.
Bernie
Thanks guys! Its Owen and Ellis, right?

Owen
Yeah, Bernie right?
Bernie
Yeah! What do you guys have second period?
Ellis
Spanish.
Owen
Oh I have chess masters class. Its my first elective.
Betty
Oh Ellis we have Spanish too! We better get going. Have fun in chess class Owen!
They leave the classroom.
Bernie & Betty stop at their locker and see Braxton.
Bernie
Hey Braxton.
Betty
We are really sorry about what happened earlier
Braxton
Oh hey girls. Its cool
Ellis walks up to them
Ellis
Yo. Brax what are they doing here?
Braxton
They were ummm just apologizing to me.
Ellis
Oh, cmon lets go bro.
Braxton and Ellis walk away as if dating.
Betty

Wow. She just stole our man!

Bernie
I cant even believe she just did that!
Betty
Woah! Betty look over there!
Betty points to a really attractive guy.
Bernie
OMG! He is so cute!!!
Betty
Lets go say Hi to him and introduce ourselves..
Bernie
Okay come on!
They walk over to him. Fade out.