1. Its a paradigm shift = I dont know whats going on in our business.

But were not making as much money as we used to. 2. Were data-driven = We try not to make decisions by the seat of our pants. When possible, we try to base them in facts. 3. We need to wrap our heads around this = Gosh, I never thought of that. We need to discuss that. 4. Its a win-win = Hey, we both get something out of this (even though Im really trying to get the best from you) 5. ROI [used in any sentence] = Look at me, Im very financially-minded, even if I never took any finance classes in school 6. Lets blue sky this/lets ballpark this = Lets shoot around a bunch of ideas since we have no clue what to do 7. Im a bit of a visionary = Im a bit of an egomaniac and narcissist 8. Im a team player/we only hire team players = I hope everyone on the team thinks this is a meritocracy, even though Im the dictator in charge 9. Lets circle back to that/Lets put that in the parking lot/lets touch base on that later/lets take this off-line = Shut up and lets go back to what I was talking about 10. We think outside the box here/color outside the lines = We wouldnt know about how to do something innovative if it came up to us and bit us in the behind 11. I/we/you dont have the bandwidth = Since we cut 60% of our headcount, were all doing the job of 3 people, so were all burned out 12. This is where the rubber meets the road = Dont screw up 13. Net net/the net of it is/when you net it out = I never studied finance or accounting but I sound like someone who can make money if I keep talking about another word for profit 14. Well go back and sharpen our pencils = Well go back and offer you the same for 20% less in hopes youll buy it before the end of the quarter 15. Its like the book Crossing the Chasm/Blue Ocean/Good To Great / Tipping Point / Outliers = Ive never read any of these books but I sound literate if I quote from them. And, besides, you cretins probably never read them either to call me out on it 16. Lets right-size it = Lets whack/fire a bunch of people 17. Its next-gen/turn-key/plug-and-play = I want it to sound so technical that youll just buy it without asking me any questions

18. We need to manage the optics of this = How can we lie about this in a way people will believe? 19. This is creative destruction = Ive never read Joseph Schumpeter but our core business is getting killed so its your responsibility to come up with a new product the market will buy 20. We dont have enough boots on the ground = I dont want to be fired for this disastrous product/country launch, so Im going to sound tough referring to the military and say I dont have enough resources 21. Deal with it = Tough cookies 22. By way of housekeeping = This makes the boring stuff Im about to say sound more official 23. Thats the $64,000 question [sometimes, due to inflation, people will denominate this cliche in millions or billions of dollars] = I dont know either 24. Lets square the circle = Im someone who can unify two team members views and sound important 25. Its our cash cow/protect/milk the cash cow = If that business goes south, were all out of a job 26. Its about synergies/1 + 1 = 3 = I dont get the math either, but it sounds like more and more is better, right? 27. Whos going to step up to the plate? = One of you is going to do this and its not going to be me 28. Were eating our own dog food = It sounds gross but we seem like honest folks if we do this. 29. We need to monetize/strategize/analyze/incentivize = When in doubt, stick -ize on the end of a word and say weve got to do this and 9 out of 10 times, it will sound action-oriented. 30. We did a Five Forces/SWOT analysis/Value Chain analysis = We didnt really do any of that, but none of you probably even remember Michael Porter, so what the heck 31. It was a perfect storm = We really screwed up but were going to blame a bunch of factors that are out of our hands (especially weather) 32. At the end of the day. = OK, enough talking back and forth, were going to do what I want to do 33. Whos got the R? [i.e., responsibility to do what we just spent 20 minutes talking about aimlessly] = If I ask the question, it wont be assigned to me 34. Lets put lipstick on this pig = plug your nose 35. Im putting a stake in the ground here = Im a leader, simply because Im using this cliche

36. Were customer-focused/proactive/results-oriented = That cant be bad, right? This is motherhood and apple pie stuff 37. Our visibility into the quarter is a little fuzzy = Sales just fell off a cliff 38. Thats not our core competency/were sticking to our knitting = Were just glad were making money in one business, because wed have no clue how to get into any other business 39. Well, were facing some headwinds there = You put your finger on the area were panicking over 40. Its a one-off = Do whatever they want to close the sale 41. Incent it = Thats not a verb but I just made it into one because Im a man/woman of action 42. Im an agent of change = This makes it sound like I know how to handle the chaos that our business is constantly going through 43. Weve got to do a little more due diligence there = Dont have a clue but does that legal term make me sound detail-oriented? 44. Dont leave money on the table = Be as greedy with them as possible 45. We take a ready, fire, aim approach here = We totally operate on a seat-of-the-pants basis 46. Hope is not a strategy = I dont have a strategy, but this makes it sound like Im above people who also dont have a strategy 47. We have to tear down the silos internally = Our organizational structure is such a mess that Im going to be under-mined by other departments at every turn 48. I dont think it will move the needle = This wont get my boss excited 49. Good to put a face to the name = Id really rather talk to that person behind you 50. Lets take the 30,000 foot view = I like to think I see the big picture 51. Its the old 80-20 rule = I really have no idea what the rule was, but I just want to focus on the things that will make us successful 52. We need to manage expectations = Get ready to start sucking up to people 53. Its not actionable enough/whats the deliverable? = You guys do the work on refining the idea. Im too tired. 54. My 2 cents is = This opinion is worth a heck of a lot more than 2 cents 55. Im going to sound like a broken record here = I want to clearly point out to you idiots that Ive made this point several times before

56. Weve got too many chiefs and not enough Indians = I want to be the Chief 57. Going forward = Dont screw up like this again 58. My people know Ive got an open door policy = Ive told my direct reports to come to me if they have a problem, so why should I feel bad if they complain Im too busy to talk to them? 59. Its gone viral = Someone sent a tweet about this 60. I know youve been burning the candle on both ends = Get ready to do some more 61. Its scalable = We can sell a lot of it in theory 62. Its best-of-breed = We hired a market research firm to say that 63. Were all about value-add = Unlike our competitors who seek to add no value 64. Whats our go-to-market? = Has anyone planned this out, because Ive been too busy? 65. Im drinking from a fire hose right now = I want a little sympathy over here, because Im tired of carrying this company on my back 66. Were getting some push back = Theyre not buying it 67. We need to do a level-set = Ive never been inside a Home Depot, but this phrase makes me sound handy 68. Its basic blocking and tackling = How could you screw this up? I also played high school football and those were the best days of my life. 69. Lets put our game faces on = Get serious, guys 70. Weve got it covered from soup to nuts = I have no idea what that means, but dont you dare question my prep work on it 71. We dont want to get thrown under the bus = So lets throw someone else first 72. But to close the loop on this = Always the more theoretical Business Development/Strategy guys who say this, so they can sound thorough 73. What are next steps? = Did anyone take notes during the last 90 minutes of this meeting? 74. This is low-hanging fruit = Get this done quickly 75. We need a few quick wins = Weve got to trick people into thinking we know what were doing by some successes we can point to and claim as ours

76. Its a [Insert Company Name] killer = Did I get your attention yet with the Freddy Kreuger imagery associated with the company whos currently eating our lunch? 77. I want to address the elephant in the room = I know you think Im trying to cover up/gloss over something, so I might as well talk about it 78. This is the next big thing/new thing = Some of our 20-somethings have told me this is really cool 79. This time its different because = Dont wait for the explanation simply run for the hills. 80. What are the best practices on this? = How can I cover my behind that were just doing stuff the way other good people have supposedly done this? 81. This is our deliverable = I know this sounds like something that comes in a body bag, but it makes our PowerPoint sound tougher than it actually is 82. Well loop you in when we need to = Youre not that important to know about all the details on this 83. We want this to move up and to the right = I failed high school algebra but someone said this means well be making a lot of money if this happens 84. Were going through a re-org = No one knows what the heck is going on at the moment 85. Weve got to increase our mind-share with the customer = I think I would have been happier as a doctor doing lobotomies than in marketing as a career path 86. I dont think youre comparing apples to apples = Let me tell you how you should really think about this issue 87. Lets peel back the onion on this = I want to sound thorough so this is a better way of telling you that than simply clearing my throat 88. You phoned it in = I was too busy checking my email during your presentation that I didnt listen 89. I want you to run with this = I just threw you into the deep end of the pool and youre on your own to figure it out