What Do Girls from Recreation Centers in St. Paul Think of Motherhood?

A Collection of Interviews from Megan (MJ) Heise, Mollie Lacy, & Christen Pentek

Youth Studies Honors Seminar Fall 2011 Dr. Michael Baizerman

Overview The role of the mother was investigated through twenty interviews with girls and young women in four St. Paul rec centers. Mothers were expected to have a strong relationship with their children, be understanding, and spend time with the girls doing activities. Many girls reported that their mothers were busy working or taking care of the house and the family, and did not have enough time to spend with them. Older siblings typically took on an aspect of the mothering role (e.g. preparing younger siblings for school). We found that female rec center staff played a unique role in girls lives through giving advice to girls who could not seek it from their moms. Rec center staff members who filled the mothering role provided a safe atmosphere, and were caring and attentive. Children noted that staff set boundaries and enforced acceptable behavior, but they understood the reason for these limitations. Close relationships with female adults are critical for fostering the growth of young women. We propose that interacting with female staff has positive impacts on young people at the rec centers, and suggest a few ways of increasing these connections.

Findings Mothers Role Kids say that mothers must always put their children first. Moms are often frustrated and busy. Kids see it as a mothers job to help them pursue their dreams, no matter what they are. Good moms have an affectionate relationship with their children. Good moms spend a lot of time with their children doing ordinary things, including helping with homework and taking them places. Good moms care for their kids. This includes nurturing, keeping kids safe, and providing necessities such as a place to live and an education. Other people can do what mom does, but that does not make them a mom.

Family Dynamics Moms often need help, particularly if they are younger moms. Big families are common. Older siblings often help mom. Many of the kids felt distant from their moms, either because they did not get enough attention, did not talk to them enough, or had an otherwise strained relationship. If mom cant be there, the first people to fill in for her are other members of the family, especially the father, the oldest child, an auntie, and a grandmother.

How Rec Center Staff Act Like Mothers Rec centers provide a safe place and take care of children. Kids identify the best rec center staff as those who like kids and spend time with them. Rec center staff helped children and teens complete their homework. Rec center staff can give advice and serve as confidants in ways that mothers cannot. The girls form close relationships with rec center staff, especially female staff. All the rules set by the rec center staff are prohibitive (e.g. no spilling on the couch, no talking in the study room, no running through the halls). Good staff members are able to keep children and teens focus. Children wanted to behave well for them.

How are these findings important? Kids want experienced, knowledgeable, skilled female staff. Expectations of staff: o Keeping safe and protecting o Nurturing o Caring When female staff are not available, these needs are not met.

Kids want to spend time with moms. This may have implications for the rec centers; they may be interested in hosting more programs or events for family involvement and interaction. Youth want homework help. Young people need a quiet place to study. They appreciated help from staff with homework.

The presence of female staff was important to the kids. Female rec center staff played a unique role in that girls felt more comfortable asking them for advice than their own mothers. We would encourage more mentorship between staff and children.

Methods We interviewed 21 girls and young women in McDonough, Hancock, Jimmy Lee, and Daytons Bluff. Nineteen of these interviews were conducted one-on-one with two note-takers, and two interviews were done with pairs of girls. One of these pairs we analyzed as two separate participants; one we analyzed as a unit, since only one girl spoke.

Interviews Most interviews took place in a side room to ensure privacy. We used a poster with pictures of families and mothers to help facilitate discussion. Interviews were semi-structured to allow girls to elaborate on questions. Data was collected on four weekday evenings, and interviews ranged from 8-30 minutes. Average age of kids: 12.6 years. Range: 7- to 17-years-old. Three participants did not give their ages, so we excluded their data from this calculation.

Processing We synthesized qualitative responses into themes.

Discussion From our twenty interviews with girls in middle-childhood through late adolescence, we recognized the critical and unique role that the recreation centers in St. Paul play in their lives. Many girls felt comfortable asking female staff at the rec centers for advice and considered them familial (e.g. One girl said that a staff member was like an auntie). Girls recognized the centers as a non-judgmental environment and appreciated spending time with and receiving attention from female staff. Girls did not mention their relationships with female teachers, but we would assume that the rec centers play a distinctive role in offering a close relationship. In our interviews, girls cited the rec center workers as similar to their mothers in that the staff protected children and teens and gave them advice. However, when asked what only mothers did, girls did not mention advice. Young women may feel more comfortable asking a close female mentor at the rec center about personal questions than their mothers out of fear of judgment. These findings have implications for rec center activity planning and staff training. Despite a small sample size and time limitations, we would like to offer the St. Paul rec centers a few recommendations based on the information collected. Many girls mentioned that they viewed the rec centers as a place to complete their homework. Judging from the girls other statements about spending time with staff, we believe that homework provides a means for young people at the rec centers to interact one-on-one with

staff in a personal way and to receive individual attention. We understand the limited resources of the St. Paul rec centers, but there is a clear need for more workers so that they may spend more time working individually with young people and building close relationships. We would also suggest holding more events for families so that young people have some designated time to spend with their parents. Additionally, parents with few financial resources would be able to spend a night with their children and not worry about spending money. We only interviewed girls, but we believe that boys are also seeking to spend more quality time with their parents or other important family members. Rec centers might look into inviting individuals or groups from the University of Minnesota to do presentations for the families at the rec centers (e.g. from the Raptor Center, choral clubs from the University to perform, etc.). Although there are no clear or simple solutions to resolving some of our findings, the presence of experienced, knowledgeable, skilled, and warm female staff was particularly important to young people attending the rec centers. If more of these interactions were made available, it would have a positive impact on the children, families, and workers. It is apparent that rec center staff should be active participants in their relationships with the young people that they encounter. If given the opportunity, we would be interested in being involved in implementing a program in one of the St. Paul rec centers. We would like to discuss what programs the Parks and Rec Department feels would be the most salient and how we may get

involved. For example, we would be interested in teaching children new crafts, setting up a book club, and other similar activities.

Acknowledgements We would like to thank Michael Baizerman for giving us the opportunity to conduct this project despite the likelihood that we would fall on our faces. Thank you, Emily Rence, for being the schpielmeister, driving us to the rec centers, and giving us invaluable advice throughout our entire process. Thank you, Kathy Korum, for your special attention to our class and discussing our project with us. Lastly, we would like to thank the city of St. Paul and the Rec Centers for serving young people in the community and allowing us access to the thoughts of these valuable members of society.