Zaks Quicky Fortress Generator

Fortress Stats:
1d12 outer towers, each with 1d4 visible defenders.
For waterfront towers, throw d6s equal to towers on
paper, these are where your towers are, and number
of defenders; draw coast accordingly, with landward
edge at widest gap in the dice.
Walls are 3d20 feet tall, towers 1d20 feet above that.
Waterfront towers have 2d20 feet of sloping ground
below; roll 1d4:
1. Normal
2. Muddy, slow-going
3. Muddy, slippery
4. rocky, slippery
Ease of Climbing: 1d10-5 = bonus/penalty to climb
checks. (Climbing: no rope = DEX/2 feet/round, rope =
DEX feet/round.)
Defenders:
Total defenders = visible defenders x 1d20; 1d4
respond per round to an alarm.
First volley = arrows; second volley (1d4 = normal, 1d12
= goblins):
1. Arrows
2. Flaming arrows/bolts
3. Poisoned arrows/bolts
4. Boiling oil (1d6+3 damage, -3 to hit)
5. Green Slime
6. 1d4 Pig Balloon riders
7. 1d4/tower Othuagg balloon riders
8. Floating, biting, hallucinogenic gas-spore beings
9. Goblin witch
10. Goblin alchemist with 1d4 weird devices
11. Goblin maggot priest
12. 1d4/tower Eyes of Fate
Defences
Gatehouse (roll 8 times, ignore duplicate results, dont
re-roll):
1. Barbican/gatehouse up a high staircase (4d20 feet
high).
2. Moat, 1d6+4 x10 feet across. 25% Monster; 25%
Curving causeway, 2d100 feet; 25% Acid; 25%
Hallucinogenic fumes
3. Inner portcullises at both ends.
4. Arrow slits.
5. Murder holes.
6. Barbican with murder holes + arrow slits. 50% roof;
50% portcullises.
7. Secondary walls, 1d20 feet higher than outer walls,
1d4 fewer towers.
8. Exotic monster in barbican/gatehouse.
Windows are 1d20 + 30 high (AC15/5, +/- 1d4).

This table by Zak S. Smith of dndwithpornstars.blogspot.co.nz

Layout by Iain Jones of dragonatthedinnertable.blogspot.com

Complications (1d4):
1. Secret Entrance: 1d12 oclock.
2. Garrison under attack by a local force when PCs arrive.
3. Garrison under attack from monster(s) when PCs
arrive.
4. Garrison beset by enemy-within monster when PCs
arrive.
5. Garrison is lazy, drunk, etc.
6. Crazed beast caged, en route to capital, housed here
temporarily.
7. Mad treasure: 1d10x100gp worth.
8. Mad crazy treasure: 1d6x1000gp worth.
9. Interesting treasure: 1d10x100gp + 1 magic item.
10. Internecine warfare within garrison.
11. Garrison infected with a disease.
12. Important prisoners kept in the dungeon.
13. Bizarre architecture: Fortress is built on stilts, struts,
pillars.
14. Bizarre architecture: Fortress made of semitranslucent stone.
15. Bizarre architecture: Fortress partially made of
colossal animal skeleton.
16. Bizarre architecture: (other).
17. Poisonous mould/vines cover everything, garrison
protected by equipment/magic/etc.
18. Mad wizards lab within.
19. Important visitors (lord/ladies/etc.).
20. Weird chaos cult or demon worship.
21. Recent disaster has cracked defences.
22. Garrison is expecting visitors, mistakes PCs for them.
23. Garrison is rebelling against its lords, may enlist PC
assistance.
24. Feast being celebrated when PCs arrive, garrison
distracted.
25. Garrison cursed: hollow-eyed, hopeless.
26. Princess in need of rescue locked in tower.
27. Desolate area, low on supplies (food, arrows, etc.)
28. Garrison all similarly mutated.
29. Spare time: garrison makes cheese, wine, etc.
30. Spare time: garrison gamble on basilisk fights, etc.
If duplicates are rolled, roll here:
1. Captain is cordial and curious about outsiders, or at
least pretending to be
2. Captain is insane.
3. A garrison member falls in love with a PC.
4. A garrison member owes a PC a favour.
5. Captain intends to capture PCs and pump them for
information about some intriguing scheme they actually
know nothing about.
6. Interior architecture is irrational dead ends,
pointlessly sloping passages, etc.