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Date: October 20, 2016

To: Dr. Jackson
From: Andrew Wooten
Re: Major Assignment #1

Major Assignment #1: Urban Design Revision

Statement of
Transmittal Enclosed is the final revision of the Urban Design report
for Major Assignment #1.

Explanation of
Editing and Request
for Revision The Urban Design report was edited for numerous
mistakes, varying in type. These mistakes have been
categorized by paragraph. Within each paragraph, the
mistakes are categorized by error type. This report has
been edited to improve its readability and improve its
professionalism.

Paragraph 1 Errors and Corrections

Spelling and Word Choice Errors:

Change loose to lose

Change its to its
Change accomodate to accommodate
Change enviroment to environment
Change cities to citys
Change scenerioes to scenarios

The word loose is an adjective. The word lose is a verb.

Lose is more appropriate for the sentence, as loose takes
place of the verb, making the sentence grammatically
incorrect.

The word its indicates a contraction of the words it is.

But in the sentence, the word should be showing
possession towards the word ambivalence. The more
appropriate word would be its, which shows possession.
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The word cities is plural, implying multiple cities are being

discussed. The report is over one city (Grand City). Another
error is the function of the word, as the city is showing
possession of the word decision. This would make the
word citys the appropriate choice.

Punctuation Errors and Corrections:

Remove the comma between people and
consequently and replace with a period (comma
splice)
Capitalize consequently
Insert a comma after consequently (acts as a pause)
Remove the comma after misunderstood
Insert an em dash between process and which and
a second em dash between finalities and develop
(puts emphasis on the subject)
Delete the word and between needs and goals.
Insert a comma after needs, and a second comma
after goals (Commas are used with three or more
items)
Place parentheses, around the citys decision
making process (Used on minor digressions)
Insert a comma after the phrase by going through
this process, located in the last sentence in
Paragraph 1
Make Design in Urban Design lower-case.

Making the first sentence two sentences avoids a comma

splice. Adding comma after consequently allows for a
pause in the sentence. This is important so the emphasis
will go on the subject. The same goes for em-dashed
phrases.

When there are three or more items, a comma must be

used instead of using and with each item.

Parentheses allow for supplemental information, which is

needed so the sentence doesnt run on.

Unless it is a proper noun or at the beginning of the

sentence, capitalization does not need to occur.
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Grammatical Errors and Corrections:

Add a verb to before the words various guidelines

By adding a verb to match the other listed subjects, the

sentence has a better parallel structure.

Paragraph 2 Errors and Corrections

Spelling and Word Choice Errors:
Change effecting to affecting
Change this to these
Change idenitified to identified
Change catagories to categories
Change basicly to basically
Change inargueably to inarguably
Delete the and after commerce and replace it with
These concerns
Spell out the 3 in brackets

The word effecting acts as a verb, meaning to accomplish

something. The word affecting means to influence
something. Within the sentence, issues are influencing
Grand City. This would make affecting the appropriate
word choice.

The word this indicates a singular subject. But in the

sentence, the subject is the word issues, which is plural.
Therefore, the appropriate word choice would be these,
which indicates that there are multiple subjects.

These concerns reiterate what is being covered. Using and

and keeping it as one sentence confuses the subject that is
doing the verb of covering.

Punctuation Errors and Corrections:

Insert a comma after the region
Delete the hyphen in sub-committee and close the
word
Capitalize commerce
Delete the comma after commerce and replace
with a period
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Delete the semicolon after basically fiscal and

replace it with a comma
Add an apostrophe s to state

Subcommittee is not hyphenated in the Oxford English

Dictionary. Many words have become so well know that
they are no longer hyphenated.

Commerce is capitalized because it is the title of an

organization.

The semi-colon is not needed after basically fiscal, because

the next phrase is not a complete sentence and they also
have no coordinating conjunction.

Adding an apostrophe shows possession.

Paragraph 3 Errors and Corrections

Spelling and Word Choice Errors
Change life to live
Change insure to ensure
Change decissions to decisions
Insert the word be between to and carried

Insure is used with financial protection, whereas ensure

deals with making something happen or occur.

The word be is inserted to make carried a future tense

word.

Punctuation Errors
Insert a comma after economic sector
Delete the comma after government agency, and
replace it with a period
Capitalize instead, and place a comma after it
Delete the hyphen in co-operative and close the
word up
Delete the comma after effort
Add an apostrophe before the s in everyones
Add an s apostrophe after resident and an
apostrophe after officials
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The word life is a noun, when there should be a verb in

place of it. The verb live is the appropriate word choice, as
it makes the sentence grammatically correct by indicating
what Grand City is a better place for.

The word insure is only used to indicate financial

protection is being offered. The sentence is talking about
the future decisions about the city meeting
expectations. The word ensure, meaning to make
something occur, is the appropriate word choice.

Paragraph 4
Spelling and Word Choice Errors
Change that to which
Change criterion to criteria
Change tailered to tailored
Change farther to further
Change applicibility to applicability
Insert but after rather

The word that indicates a restrictive clause between the

construction industry and altarthe city. By using the
word which, it becomes a nonrestrictive clause, which is
grammatically correct. Using a restrictive clause indicates
that just certain activities alter the city. A nonrestrictive
clause indicates that all of the construction industrys
activities affect the city.

Criteria should be used in place of criterion because it is

the plural form of it. There are multiple criterion to
development city proposals. Therefore, a plural form must
be used.

The word farther indicates a physical distance between

two or more objects. Further indicates an amount or
degree of measurement. The subject are issues, which are
being refined to a greater extent, making further the
appropriate word choice.

Punctuation Errors
Delete the hyphen in on-going and close up the
word (Oxford Dictionary)
 6

Insert a comma after criteria

Delete the apostrophe in officials (plural, not
possessive)
Insert parentheses around especially in the US and
delete the comma after US
Insert close quotation-marks after handbook

Handbook is being used as a hypothetical word, so

quotation marks will indicate that. The word already
had one set, it just needed the other to be complete.

Paragraph 5
Spelling and Word Choice Errors:
Change generaly to generally
Change thru out to throughout
Change requires to require
Change visability to visibility

The words thru out are the informal and incorrect spelling
of the word throughout. This shows a lack of
professionalism within the report. Throughout is the
appropriate word choice.

The added s on the word require complicates the

subject-verb agreement. The subject areas needs to
agree with the verb, meaning that the appropriate word
would be require. If the subject was area, requires would
be correct for because it follows the subject-verb
agreement.

Punctuation Errors:
Delete the period in the listed item Neighborhood
business districts

Periods do not (generally) need to go into bulleted lists.

Grammatical Errors:
Delete a in a strong historic identity and replace it
with their
Delete having an in having an unusual cultural
background and replace it with their
 7

Delete needs to be preserved in Distinctive

neighborhoods need to be preserved

Repeating their creates a better parallel structure in the

sentence.

The items being listed are all subjects. The final item has a
verb phrase. This doesnt agree with parallel structure.

Alignment Errors:
Embed the list into the text, and use numbers in
parentheses to create an embedded list.

By embedding the list in the paragraph, the report

becomes more organized and less broken apart.

Paragraph 6 Errors and Corrections

Punctuation Errors:
Insert a comma after very little
Insert a hyphen between man and made

Grammatical Errors:
Insert the word by between and and the spaces

Using by makes the spaces parallel with the other

listed subjects.

Paragraph 7 Errors and Corrections

Spelling and Word Choice Errors:
Change that to which
Spell out numerical amounts in the list

Punctuation Errors:
Insert a comma after Grand City
Lower-case East-West (not proper nouns)
Remove the hyphen between East-West and
replace it with the word to
Add an em dash before that and after companies
(creates emphasis)
Insert a colon after They are (Used if a list is next in
the text)
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Grammatical Errors:
Delete the word intersects and replace it with cross
(Parallelism)
Delete assets totaling and replace with with assets
of. Do this to all of the other list items that dont
follow this structure (Parallelism)

Cross creates parallelism with the other subjects in the

sentence. Using the phrase with assets of creates a parallel
structure between the subjects in the list.

Paragraph 8 Errors and Corrections

Spelling and Word Choice Errors:
Change beside to besides (One indicates a
comparison while the other indicates a location)
Change boomming to booming
Change numberous to numerous
Change inovations to innovations
Change frm to form
Change effect to affect (To influence, not
accomplish and also not a noun)

Punctuation Errors:
Delete the semi-colon after topography and
replace with a colon (List)
Put Southeasterly in lower-case (Not a proper
noun)
Capitalize river (Part of a title/proper noun)
Insert a comma after Unfortunately (pause in
sentence/helps reader)
Delete the semi-colon after form and replace with
a comma

Grammatical Errors:
Insert the words of the city after the varied
elevation (Parallelism)
Delete our energies are directed and replace with
direct our energies (Parallelism)

Paragraph 9 Errors and Corrections

Spelling and Word Choice Errors:
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Change considerablely to considerably

Change lead to led (Present tense when it should
be past tense)

Punctuation Errors:
Insert a comma between years and urban
Add an apostrophe s to city (Possession)
Delete the comma after following and replace with
a colon (List)
Insert parentheses around especially in the inner
city (Substantial information)
Delete the comma between town and the Bend
Rose area

Grammatical Errors:
Delete raising of and replace with rising

Using rising instead of raising of is an example of an

intransitive verb. Unemployment rises and doesnt
need a subject to do so. Raising of is used as a
transitive verb, but there is so subject to do so.

Paragraph 10
Spellings and Word Choice Errors:
Change appropiate to appropriate
Change accessable to accessible
Change improvment to improvement
Delete They and replace with Urban designers
(Reiterates who the subject is and makes the
sentence sound less ambiguous)

Punctuation Errors:
Insert an em dash before allied and after
Commerce
Insert parentheses starting before e.g., and ending
after areas
Put Working in lower-case.

Grammatical Errors:
Insert parcels of land between and and at least
(Parallelism)
Insert By before Working (Indicates a function)
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Insert the words towards Grand City between

improvement and can (Puts a subject in the
sentence, removing the dangling modifier)

Request For
Response I expect a graded copy of this revision of by Thursday,
October 27, 2016. Email me andyjwooten@gmail.com
if you have any questions.