Mary Wright

UNIV 392
Professor Harris
07.12.2017
Paper 2: I am a leader

I loved my first student group. They were full of energy, had extroverted personalities
and connected with one another quickly. I used them as an example of a successful orientation.
Then, a week later, I led my second group. They were different. They had very different
interests, majors and personalities. However, the hardest part was they were shy.
Although they were different, I thought I could lead them the same way in which I led my
first group. For example, I used the same icebreakers and asked the same questions as I had
done with my first group. None of this went over well. The first day with my second student
group was very draining compared to my first group. One mistake I made was I kept on making
these comparisons within my head between my first and second group. However, it was not on
purpose. I personally felt like I was doing something wrong, so I was trying to analyze the
situation through comparison.
The first situation that I struggled with occured during the icebreaker hot seat. I asked
almost every single question, even though I encouraged my students to participate. They all just
stared at me. Their quietness made me feel uncomfortable.
The sessions, such as LUV, Student Engagement and advising, all went well. The
students were all amazing. They were kind, caring and passionate individuals. The only barrier
in the way was they were not comfortable with the group of 11 individuals they had just met,
which is very understandable.
Then, dinner happened. Dinner was very uncomfortable. None of them talked with one
another. While the students were eating, I went to Armeen, who is the leader of my challenge
group, for advice. Armeen told me to relate to the students. Like the students, I am a very shy
person, especially when I am out of my comfort zone. She also told me not to compare my
groups and encouraged me to focus on one-on-one conversation rather than group
conversation.
The one-on-one conversations went over very well. I learned that Sam loved acting and
wanted to join an improv team, Horte Lyn wanted to celebrate her Filipino culture by joining
Kapwa, Sophia really wanted to student abroad in a country like Vietnam and John planned to
go to PA school and help people who had similar sport injuries as him. The hardest person to
get through to was Radin, who was very nervous and barely ate during meal time. It was not
until the resource fair that I got through to him. I saw him at the campus recreation table talking
about lifeguarding which led me to asking him if he swam. We had a five-minute conversation
about swimming, which led to other students in my group to tell me they swam also. Once all of
them had opened up to me, they began to form connections with one another.
This experience helped me understand leadership and the importance of adjusting my
plans based on what my group needs. My experiences with both of my student groups went
over really well. For my first group, I connected with them all at the group-level. However, for
my second group, I connected with them all at the individual-level because that's what they
needed.
I also realized the importance of being a member of a team. I really relied on the
orientation leaders, such as Armeen and other friends, to debrief and gain energy from. They
lifted me up even when I felt drained.