This course is copyright 2013 with all rights reserved.

It is illegal
to copy, distribute, or create derivative works from this course
in whole or in part or to contribute to the copying, distribution,
or creating of derivative works of this book. When you pur-
chased this course, you agreed to the following statement:

2013, All Rights Reserved. You understand that the in-

formation contained in this course is an opinion, and it
should be used for personal entertainment purposes only.
You are responsible for your own behavior, and none of
this book is to be considered legal or personal advice.

2013, All Rights Reserved First edition by Bobby Rio (TSB Magazine)
and Rob Judge (Date Hotter Girls, LLC) 2013, All Right Reserved
 Table of ContentS
Introducution to Seductive Storytelling..............5

PART 1: Adding to the Vibe: Make Sure Your

Stories Work FOR You, Not AGAINST You.........11
1A. Teaser Sentence: How to Introduce a
Story and Gauge Her Interest....................12
1B. Accordion Theory: Keep Your Stories
Fluid so They Add to the Vibe......................16
1C. Conversation navigation: Control the
Vibe by Steering Toward Loaded Topics........20

PART 2: Building the Foundation: The Attitude,

Categories, and Inspiration of Seductive Stories....22
2A. Faking It Ruins Stories: Be Vulnerable,
Not Cool When Telling Your Stories.......23
2B. The Main 4: Choosing the Right Seductive
Story for the Right Moment of a Seduction...26
2C. Avoid Obvious and Passive: The Two
Killers of a Seductive Story...........38

PART 3: What Makes a Story Seductive: The

3-Element System for Flawless Storytellings..42
3A. Motivation: What a Character Wants
is the Seed of a Story.....................44
3B. Conflict and Consequence: When a Char-
acter Struggles the Storys Heart Beats.........50
3C. Resolution: The Result of the Characters Quest
Causes Change and Gives a Story Focus......60

3
 Table of Contents

PART 4: Adding Seductive Details: Per-

fect Descriptions Make Stories PERFECT...68
4A. Show, Dont Tell: A Story Should
Be an Experience, Not a Report...........69
4B. Where To Add: Description Calls Attention
to Moments that Need It.............................72
4C. Storytelling Toolbox: Plug-in Templates
That Make A Story Instantly Seductive....81

APPENDIX: Pulling It All Together........................91

Appendix A. Objections to Overcome:
A Listener Will Ask Herself These Ques-
tions Which Your Story Has to Answer.....92
Appendix B. Annotated Story Example: Exam-
ining A Seductive Story Under the Microscope..95
Appendix C. Frequently Asked Questions:
Typical Concerns About Storytelling.............99

4
 I n t r o duc u t i o n to
Se d uc t i v e S t o r y tel ling

T
hink back to your school days, back when you had that
dreadfully boring teacher for that horribly tortious
class (yeah, THAT one). Now remember the time that
teacher walked into class and annonced, Today well
be watching a movie that relates to our lesson. And
remember how it was as if the gods of entertainment were smil-
ing down on you from the hills of the Hollywood because the
movie was something you ACTUALLY wanted to see.

How awesome was that? Seriously. It probably felt like the edu-
cational equivalent of winning the lotto.

To have the luxury of relaxing at your desk and being ENTER-

TAINED for an hour-long class is a feeling that holds a special
place in every students heart. When given a choice between be-
ing TOLD facts or being ENTERTAINED by facts, we always pre-
fer the latter. As Kipling remarked, If history were taught in the
form of stories, it would never be forgotten.

This introduction, however, isnt about school or teaching history

or anything remotely academic. Instead, its to introduce you to
the bestand most SEDUCTIVEway to convey your personal
history so that its never forgotten.

While every guy reading probably relates to that sublime mov-

ie-in-class moment, most of us soon forget the sentiment when

5
 Introduction

interacting with women. Rather than give women the luxury

of relaxing and being entertained by who we are, we do what
every other guy does: report the facts of who we are to her.

I work for such-and-such company, went to blah-blah-blah

school, like this-and-that activity. Sound familiar? For most at-
tractive women, its worse than familiarits dreadfully bor-
ing and not memorable. Just as you probably dont remember
much from that horribly tortious class, guys who convey their
identity by reporting facts are quickly forgotten, as well.

Thats why learning to tell a seductive story is an invaluable as-

set to your success with women. If you can captivate a wom-
ans attention, stir her emotions, and entertain her with the
facts about your life through stories, not only will she savor
your time together and really get an understanding of who
you are, youll also remain on her mind long after the conver-
sation or date is over.

Though, you probably already knew that. After all, youre

embarking on a course titled Seductive Storytelling, which
means you obviously acknowledge storytellings immense
importance in attracting women. What you probably DONT
yet know is that telling a great story is completely within your
reach. Most guys assume storytelling is some esoteric talent,
reserved for the few of us blessed with innate creativity and
charisma.

6
 Introduction

That is just so not true. The FIRST step to becoming a seduc-

tive storyteller is to forget whatever preconceived notions
you may have about storytelling as being some lofty endeavor
that requires divine inspiration. At its core, every great story
answers one of two simple questions:
1. What changed?
2. If nothing changed, why not?

If you think of books youve read, movies youve seen, or sto-

ries youve heard, heres what they ALL have in common: it in-
volved either HOW the main character CHANGED or WHY the
main character DID NOT CHANGE. If youve ever heard some-
one tell a story in which nothing changed nor was there an
explanation WHY nothing changed, then you didnt really hear
a story at allyou either listened to someones reporting (at
best) or rambling (at worst).

Change does not necessarily mean a Kafkaesque metamor-

phosis that alters a characters entire being. Seductive stories
often involve subtle changes, like learning a lesson or revers-
ing an opinion. Of course, you may have stories that are more
significant such as why you changed career paths or what in-
spired you to get serious about your fitness. The beauty of be-
coming a seductive storytelling is that YOU have the freedom
to decide what stories you want to tell, stories that best con-
vey YOUR identity to the woman youre getting to know!

Before delving into the course specifics, its important to iden-

7
 Introduction

tify two other immutable storytelling elements: 1.) a charac-

ters motivation and 2.) the conflict that ensues when that
motivation is pursued. These elements are covered in depth
in this book, particularly in Part 3, but for the purpose of this
introduction its important you understand the significance of
these two elements in almost EVERY story.

A characters motivation and the resulting conflict are often

what makes or breaks a story. Think of it in terms of this basic
formula:

Every day (character) did _______(1)_______ until the

day (character) wanted _________(2)________. Be-
cause of that, _______(3)________ happened, which
led to____(4)______. And thats when/why/how (char-
acter) ______(5)______.

1. What pre-changed character was like before story

2. Characters motivation
3. Conflict
4. Consequence of conflict
5. Change

A common symptom of a boring story is predictable character

motivation, which inevitably leads to an uninteresting conflict.
To ensure your stories ARE NOT boring or predictable, we are
going to challenge YOU to REALLY CONSIDER what motivates
the characters you describe in your stories.

8
 Introduction

Were not, however, advocating you lie or invent character

motivations. NEVER do we advise that you to lie to women
or tell fake stories. This is NOT a course on fiction. Moreover,
the purpose of telling a woman your stories is to express your
TRUE identity, which creates rapport. Nothing destroys rap-
port and violates a womans trust faster than a liar

That being said, getting in the habit of digging a layer deeper,

so you delve beyond the predictable and the obvious, is a skill
that will benefit you well beyond storytelling. When you RE-
ALLY examine peoples behavior with the intention of deci-
phering the NON-OBVIOUS MOTIVATION behind a decision or
action, you begin to understand people on a very deep level.

And since YOU are going to be the main character of SO MANY

of your seductive stories, giving careful thought to the DEEP-
ER reasons motivating YOUR OWN actions will make you more
self-aware, more insightful, and just a more attractive guy to
be around.

So before you officially begin this course, please realize that

much of your storytelling success or failure will rest on how
closely you adhere to the Greek aphorism. Know thyself. In
Part 3.1, youre going to learn a concept we call Cool Vulner-
ability. Stories people never forget are the stories that are
honest and truthful. (Sometimes painfully so.) The truth and
honesty of a storyteller comes less from facts and more from
feelings and insights. Emotional honesty and insightful truth

9
 Introduction

should guide your quest in becoming a seductive storyteller.

Lets get started.

An explanation on some of the word choices used in this book: Whenever

we describe the person whom a story is primarily about (a.k.a., the protago-
nist), we chose to use the word character. In a personal narrative, even
though youre telling the story in the first person (i.e., the I perspective),
the character is still you.

We hope that by using a word like character you start to view yourself as
a story element, which might give you the emotional space needed to
discover a story possibility that may not have been apparent otherwise.

Furthermore, for simplicity, we consistently refer to the character using

masculine pronouns (e.g., he, his). Likewise, the listener is consistently re-
ferred to as she. We do NOT mean to assume that you will never tell a story
about a female character or that your only listeners will be women. The ONLY
reason we chose these pronouns was for clarity and simplicity purposes. We
anticipated that most readers will be men who want to improve their sto-
rytelling abilities so they can better relate to women, and so we chose pro-
nouns accordingly.

10
 Part 1
Adding to the
ib V e
Make Sure Your Stories Work FOR You,
Not AGAINST You
 Pa r t 1 A : T e a s e r S ent enc e
How to Introduce a Story
and Gauge Her Interest

L
et me begin the official Seductive Storytelling curricu-
lum by saying this course is about getting you results
with women first, becoming a great storyteller second.
Like other skills that help with woman (such as humor),
becoming a great storyteller is a GREAT asset...BUT its
NOT the be all and end all.

Just like you can probably think of plenty funny guys who arent
killing it with the ladies, there are incredible storytellers who do
not do well with women, as well. So, while getting great at telling
funny, interesting, and entertaining stories is obviously a huge
part of this course, EVERYTHING we teach is also measured by
the standard: how is this going to improve your success with
women?

When examined through that lens, the first technique of any

seductive storyteller is learning when its time to tell a story, and
when its better to do a summary telling. EVEN IF you have
a great story about a topic you and a woman are discussing, if
you just launch into that story without first gauging her inter-
est in/attention to that story, then youre simply telling the story
for your own enjoyment...and it can actually HURT your chances
with the woman youre talking to.

Therefore, its CRUCIAL that you learn how to use the teaser
sentence as a tactical conversation tool to determine when and

12
 Part 1
if to tell your stories. As you can imagine, the teaser sentence is
simply a one-sentence synopsis of a story from your life. Think
of it almost like a movie trailer that gauges a womans inter-
est and teases her into wanting to hear more. Some teaser
examples that you will hear and read in this course are:
A fat girl molesting my shy friend
My crazy grandma tricking me into bragging about my
fake great grandfather who invented the traffic light
The worst thing that ever happened at my worst summer job
My homophobic dad unintentionally leading me to a cre-
ative career

Notice how those examples bait a listener into wanting to

hear more by eliciting curiosity. Adding funny or quirky adjec-
tives to a teaser sentence can add to its effectiveness. Notice
how much youd probably rather hear a story about how my
homophobic dad caused me to go into a creative career
rather than just my dad.

Thats because my dad simply leading me to a creative ca-

reer sounds like its going to be a clich story. A woman would
probably think to herself, Sigh, lemme guess...his dad was
some kind of artist and he taught his son to grow up creative...
However, when peppered with adjectives like homophobic
and unintentionally, suddenly the story sounds less clich,
less predictable, and thus more interesting.

Teaser sentences not only build anticipation and excitement

13
 Part 1
for the story youre about to tell, they also let you gauge if
you should even tell it in the first place. If a woman and I were
discussing what we had done over the weekend, and I used a
teaser sentence like, Youre not going to BELIEVE how a fat
girl molested my shy friend... but she didnt smile or react in a
positive way, I probably wouldnt launch into a 3-minute story.

Id probably just summarize what happened and move on.

Learning to summarize your stories into one-sentence expla-
nations is an aspect of accordion theory which is another
concept of seductive storytelling youre going to learn in the
next section. But first, lets make sure you know EXACTLY how
to construct teaser sentences that seem spontaneous and
add to the vibe

Transition phrase* + Teaser sentence + How it relates to the

vibe/conversation

*Here are some examples of transition phrases:

Its kind of crazy
Funny you ask
I remember when...
I need to take you back to the 80s to answer that...
Let me tell you about...

Here are some teaser examples

A girl orders a margarita and asks why Im just drinking a beer:
To answer that, you need to know what happened in

14
 Part 1
Mexico. This was when my normally-well-behaved friend
and I got forcefully removed from a hotel in Cancun, which
explains why I DONT drink tequila

A girl asks how I ended up as a magazine writer:

Well. First I have to explain how my my homophobic dad
unintentionally made me want to get an MFA in writing,
which is how I ended up in publishing

A girl just told me about a creepy boss she had during a sum-
mer job in high school:
Wow, let me tell you about the worst thing that ever hap-
pened at my worst summer job, which might make you
feel a little better about your boss

A girl asks me what nationality I am:

Funny you ask because when I was a kid my crazy grand-
ma told me I was related to all these famous people, and
it was all lies, so that makes me explaining a quarter of my
nationality a little complicated but also kinda funny

Pro Tip: Adding a phrase at the end of your teaser sentence

like its kinda funny or its sort of crazy story can help sig-
nal to a woman that you have a story to tell. But dont over-do
it! Avoid over-hyping your story by saying things like, Its the
BEST story or This is going to CRACK YOU UP! Seductive
storytelling always works best if you under-promise and over-
deliver.

15
 P a r t 1 B : A c co r d i o n Theo ry
Keep Your Stories Fluid
so They Add to the Vibe

T
here is nothing worse than letting a good vibe with a
hot girl suddenly go bad! There are a lot of reasons this
happens, but one big one is not reading her signals. I
know I have accidently ruined vibes with girls because
I stupidly launched into a long, drawn-out story that
she had little or no interest in hearing

Using storytelling accordion theory makes sure that this

doesnt happen. As the name implies, accordion theory states
that you should be able to expand and contract your stories ac-
cording to the vibe. You my have a 5-minute story about your trip
to Germany, but it might be best for the vibe if you condensed
that story down to 2 minutes.

Conversely, sometimes a woman is enjoying one of your stories

so much that it helps the vibe when you expand and stretch it
out. For example, you might be telling a story about a crazy high
school teacher you had, which has a woman laughing her ass off.
In that situation, it would certainly help to either expand that
story or have other stories about that high school teacher char-
acter ready to go.

For now, dont worry yet about expanding your stories. The tem-
plates, formulas, and techniques in later sections of this course
will explain how to expand your stories.

16
 Part 1
Our only concern in this section is breaking your stories down
into the smallest, shortest components, which, as mentioned
in the previous section is by using a summary sentence. This
lets you quickly deliver the information (factual content) of
a story without getting hung up on the narrative details.

Summary sentences are an absolute necessity to preserve the

vibe and keep the conversation flowing. Thats why its very
important to learn to break stories down into summary sen-
tences that you can quickly rattle them off and move on.

Making sure the vibe between you and a woman stays posi-
tive and flows requires you to use teaser sentences tacti-
cally and to read her response. Its best to give a summary,
if you see any of these signs after delivering your teaser sen-
tence:
She looks off in a distracted way
She looks/says shes offended
She breaks off physical contact
She says something that sounds forced like, Oh yeah,
sounds cool

Learning to read signals can be a little tricky, but you should get
yourself in the habit of gauging a womans response to your
teasers. For me, if a woman isnt laughing or smiling when I
deliver my teaser, I usually either just say a summary or give an
extremely condensed version of the story. My attitude (which
should become your attitude) is this: I have PLENTY of great

17
 Part 1
stories to share so I dont NEED to tell her this story.

Confident storytellers never force their best stories onto

their listeners. Instead, they KNOW that ALL their stories are
good, so they only tell the ones that will add to the vibe and
are of interest to the person their talking with. Im sure you
can think of a time someone told you story after story, bor-
ing you to death with narratives that just werent interesting
to you. Dont be that guy! (And especially dont be that guy
around women)

Thus, as you assemble the stories from your life, you want to
also be sure that you can tell a summary of those stories in
one sentence. The formula for a good summary is simply pull
out the facts or information of the story without the nar-
rative details. Here are some examples:

A fat girl molesting my shy friend: This chubster was out of

control at the bar and got a little too frisky with my friend,
which made him REALLY uncomfortable because hes usually
the shiest of all our friends.

My crazy grandma tricking me into bragging about my fake

great grandfather: My grandma was adopted as a kid and
then became crazy as an adult, so she was delusional about
her ancestry, especially her grandfather, so Im very confused
as to a quarter of my nationality.

18
 Part 1
The worst thing that ever happened at my worst summer job:
One of the guys I worked with at the highway department
found naked pictures of a guy I went to high school with, but
he mistakenly thought it was some kid who lived up the block
from him and mailed the pictures to that poor kids parents!

My homophobic dad unintentionally leading me to a creative

career: Ever since I was a kid, Ive enjoyed art, but my dad
never let me take art lessons growing up because he thought
it was teaching me to be a sissy so to spite him, I went got
an MFA and took a job in writing.

19
Pa r t 1C : c o n v e r s a t i o n navigat io n
Control the Vibe by Steering
Toward Loaded Topics

T
he final introductory concept we need to cover be-
fore getting into the actual elements of storytelling
is conversation navigation. Learning to steer and
direct the conversation where you want it is a crucial
aspect of storytelling because it will allow you to set
yourself up to tell stories.

For example, I tell my crazy grandma story on almost every

date I go on because, on every date on go on, I ask women, What
nationality are you? Once they answer, they will (without fail)
then ask me about my nationality. That is the perfect setup for
me to drop a teaser on her, gauge her response, and then tell my
story.

In other courses, conversation navigation has also been called

invisible threads. Its simply a way for you to make sure that
the conversation moves in the direction you want it. While you
should NEVER force a story into a conversation (per what you
learned in the last section), if you DO have a story to tell (and es-
pecially a good one!) then its always good to know how to direct
the conversation toward that story so it seems spontaneous.

One final word on navigating conversations: dont be afraid to

go a little off topic. Often as guys we think conversations have to
follow a very logical progressionyet, as you already know, the
vibe is primarily about FEELINGS and EMOTIONS, not facts and

20
 Part 1
information. She wont care if you veer off on a tangent if you
tell a great story.

Thats why its good to know several entry points to your

best stories. For example, I could also tell my crazy grand-
ma story if were on the topic of embarrassing childhood mo-
ments, funny family stories, knowing/being related to famous
people, etc..

Just to illustrate what I mean, I sometimes talk about my

brother-in-law who was a famous child actor (youve seen his
movies) and then say, But thats not the only famous person
Im related toor so I thoughtmy crazy grandma told me
my great grandfather invented the traffic light, which led to a
pretty embarrassing day for me when I was in 3rd grade

While it takes a little practice to master conversation naviga-

tion, youll really hit the ground running if you brainstorm the
different entry points for your stories. Try and remember some
of the topics that came up on your last few dates or your last
few conversations with women. Then see how you can link
your stories to those topics.

Pro tip: Be sure to pick a curosity-eliciting transition phrase to

set up a great teaser that connects to the topic to the story
you want to tell!

21
 Part 2
b uilding the
F ou ndatio N
T A ,C , I
he ttitude ategories and nspiration of
Seductive Stories
 P a r t 2A : F a k i n g I t r u ins s to ries
Be Vulnerable, Not Cool
When Telling Your Stories

A
CRUCIAL attitude that will make you unstoppable
with women is learning cool vulnerability. When
you display cool vulnerability to women you make
yourself stand out from every other guy whos fak-
ing or trying too hard to look cool.

Guys often do this when they tell stories to women because they
want to make a good impression SO BADLY that he only tells
stories that portray him as super cool. Here are some examples
of this toxic attitude:
Exaggerating the details of a story so the storyteller ap-
pears cooler
Making a job sound more important than it really is
Only telling stories that end with something good happen-
ing to the storyteller

At some point, weve probably all done this. Since we want to

seem confident and charming and attractive to the women were
interested in, we think anything that makes us seem vulnerable is
going to cause her to think less of us. Ironically, however, thats
actually EXACTLY what causes girls to lose attraction! When a
guy puts on this fake cool guy facade it leaves women feeling the
EXACT OPPOSITE. She thinks hes insecure and annoying, which
DESTROYS the vibe.

Acting this way is unattractive in any phase of a seduction, but

23
 Part 2
its especially detrimental when youre telling her stories from
your life. You SHOULD be bonding over shared experiences
when youre telling stories, so if youre only picking stories
that are flattering and cool then youre going to turn her off
FAST.

Stop that from ever happening by making sure to display plen-

ty of what Bobby and I call cool vulnerability. If you tell her
a story that shows you in a vulnerable situation not only is she
going to feel really comfortable around you because youre
keeping it real, shes also going to see how rock-solid con-
fident you are.

A huge secret most guys never realize is that charisma is NOT

revealed during high points. ANY guy can appear charismatic
when everything is going his way. TRUE charisma and confi-
dence is on display when youre faced with an obstacle or ad-
versary and can STILL maintain your composure. (Remember
this paragraph! It also applies to storytelling, which youre go-
ing to read about in an upcoming section!)

When you use cool vulnerability to generate rapport, it works

like a hack because you describe an adverse/unfavorable
situation BUT you do so in a humorous way, which demon-
strates your charisma. While every other guy is busy faking
how cool he is, youre not afraid to tell less-than-flattering sto-
ries because youre THAT sure of yourself.

24
 Part 2
Other guys might break into a cold sweat if a girl heard about
the time they got totally embarrassed, but you not only TELL
HERyou can actually laugh over it! Some ways I display cool
vulnerability on EVERY date I go on is by telling stories like:
The time I bumped into my ex-girlfriend with her new
boyfriend
The time I got totally embarrassed in third grade when
my whole class caught me lying about my fake great
grandfather
How much of a huge nerd I am

Rather than avoid these stories, I actually BRING THEM UP!

Once you see for yourself the attractiveness of cool vulner-
ability, be careful that it doesnt get so addicting that start go-
ing into complete self-deprecating mode. Remember: youre
not putting yourself down or making fun of yourselfyoure
simply seeing the humor and humanness in moments you
were vulnerable and/or less-than-perfect.

25
 P a r t 2 B : T h e Main 4
choosing the Right Seductive Story
for the right moment of a seduction

A
s explained in the introduction, seductive stories are
anything you say that uses narrative details and/or
story structure to elicit emotion in a woman. That
means not all seductive stories are going to be tra-
ditional beginning > middle > end stories that fit
our 3-part formula. However, ALL seductive stories will contain
at least ONE of the THREE steps.

Much of this course hinges on getting you comfortable telling

those traditional 3-part stories (what we call a Seductive Struc-
tured Story) because if you can do that, you wont have a prob-
lem with any of the other 3 categories. Below we define all 4 cat-
egories, explain how/when to apply each, and list the elements
needed

Category 1: Seductive Structured Story

Used to tell: First-person memories/narratives; Third-per-
son memories/narratives
Elements Used: All 3 steps
Length: Long (1-5 minutes or more)
What is a structured story: This is the traditional 3-part story that
describes the quest of a character (either yourself or a third
person) who wants something, is met with conflict, and either
succeeds or fails.

These are the sorts of stories you will be telling on dates or dur-

26
 Part 2
ing longer interactions with women. While you can begin an
interaction with a structured story, theyre best used when
developing rapport because a woman is more interested in
what you have to say, allowing you to speak long enough to
tell a good, structured story.

You should absolutely keep teaser sentences and accordion

theory in mind before launching into a structured story. Al-
ways be ready to condense a structured story if youre losing a
womans interest or attention and/or just give a summary sen-
tence instead. Since structured stories require the most story-
telling skill, we highly recommend you think of your structured
stories in advance and begin practicing them on friends and/
or anyone else willing to listen.

When youre brainstorming personal narratives, some of your

best seductive stories will be found in childhood/adolescent
memories, such as: your first kiss, an embarrassing moment
from grammar school, first drunken experience, craziest thing
you did as a teenager, first girlfriend, etc. You obviously can
also use structured stories to tell more relevant stories like
what you did over the weekend or a trip you just took. Once
you understand all the elements of a structured story, well
also suggest other places you can look for inspiration for
great personal stories.

Third person narratives can be about almost anyone, but they

seem to work best if told about people you know decently

27
 Part 2
well since its more believable that youd understand their mo-
tivation. Like personal narratives, story ideas can range from
nostalgic things your childhood friend did to the horrible first
date your buddy found himself on the other night.

Pro Tip: Telling a third person narrative is an EXCELLENT way to

plant erotic thoughts in a womans head in an under-the-radar
way. For example, if you tell a story about YOURSELF going to
a swingers party, you might come off as perverted or creepy.
But if you tell a story about A GUY YOU WORK WITH going
to a swingers party, a woman will the have same sexual feel-
ings (if the story is told well) without thinking youre a pervert.
This is also a good way to tell asshole stories that might be
funny, but would make you appear as an unsympathetic jerk if
YOU had done the things in the story (yet its somehow okay
because it was your friend whos the asshole).

Category 2: Seductive Motivation-Effect Story

Used to tell: Roleplaying; Us-Vibing; Riffing
Elements Used: ONLY Step 1 (Motivation)
Length: Short (15-30 seconds)
What is a motivation-effect story: A short (usually playful) pro-
jection of a characters motivation/desire/drive told and retold
in a different ways. Often a motivation-effect story works by
describing one umbrella motivation, its effect, and then all the
sub-motivation-effects that stem from the primary motiva-
tion-effect. For example, heres a variation of a role-play Ive
said to girls in the past:

28
 Part 2

Youre so cool I wish I could get into a time machine, trav-

el back to the early 90s, and make you my first girlfriend
ever! Wed both be 6 years old and wed have the most
awesome 6-year-olds first date Id want to look cool, so
Id pick you up on my Big Wheels and pedal us to the play-
groundand youd be pretty damn impressed so youd
have an uncontrollable desire to be my first kisswed
have to find somewhere with a little privacy like under
the slide because thats where wed have the most ro-
mantic, most Disney-esque first kiss that playground ever
saw!

Notice how the primary motivation is wanting her to be my

first girlfriend. The primary effect is get in a time machine
and travel back to the 90s. (Side note: Making the primary
effect a little absurd and funny is GREAT for interesting and
entertaining role plays!) All the resulting motivation-effects
stem from the primary motivation-effect: wanting to look
cool, her uncontrollable desire to be my first kiss, find
somewhere with a little privacy. (And dont worry if motiva-
tion isnt totally clear yet...throughout this course, youll learn
more about character motivation.)

For now, simply take note of how a seductive motivation sto-

ry ONLY describes a character(s) motivation(s) and almost
always in a comical, absurd, and/or flirty way. The way to con-
struct a good motivation-effect story is with this formula:

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Motivation + so/because/thats why + Effect

Youd use this formula in role-play to imagine some ridiculous

scenario where you and woman are going to do something
outrageous (e.g., have an Oceans 11-esque heist in Vegas, hold
hands while skydiving over a volcano in the Ring of Fire).

Finally, its good for longer role-play if you start with a primary
motivation-effect that comes from you, state YOUR first sub-
motivation-effect THEN STATE HER motivation-effect (you
make this up, but use presumption liberally!) AND THEN STATE
BOTH OF YOUR motivation-effect.

(Reread my time machine example above and notice how

I thread MY motivation-effect, HER motivation-effect, and
BOTH OF OUR motivation-effects.)

Similarly, role-playing is almost identical to creating an us-

vibe, except ALL the motivation-effects of an us-vibe come
from the two of you. For example, my favorite us-vibe is tell-
ing girls that were both so ridiculously good look that wed
have a little Zoolander baby together. To bolster the us-vibe,
I usually start listing the motivation-effects of our love child
like, Our baby Zoolander would want to look good at all times
so it would be doing Blue Steal in your womb

Finally, riffing is simply stating the comical results of a moti-

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 Part 2
vation-effect that a woman might say. For example, if a woman
said something like, Were going to have a girls night out!
You would riff on wanting a girls night out with the ab-
surd/comical effects of that, like:
That means you guys are going to be sipping fruity girl
drinks heading to the dance floor to form a girl circle
pepper spraying any dude who comes within a 5-foot ra-
dius the girl circle

Notice in riffing that SHE supplies the original MOTIVATION

and you ONLY add a chain of EFFECTS onto her motivation.

Category 3: Seductive Character Sketch

Used to tell: Descriptions of people, places, or things
Elements Used: Usually only Seductive Details
Length: Very short to Medium (5-45 seconds)
What is a character sketch: If you want to describe a person
without launching into a full-on seductive structured story,
character sketches elicit emotions, convey ideas, while keep-
ing the vibe punchy. Seductive character sketches will most
probably be the seductive story you use MOST with women.

A seductive character sketch transforms information/facts

about who/what/where youre describing into an emotion-
al experience. A great way to get started on this is by using
one or more of the templates from the Seductive Details sec-
tion to elicit an emotional response when youre describing a
person, place, or thing. For example, if I were to describe my

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 Part 2
friend Jenny, the information-only version of that descrip-
tion would be:
My friend Jenny is so cool, she helped my friend Tom get
some chicks number at the bar yesterday.

If I wanted to make description a character sketch, I could ap-

ply the METAPHOR or POP CULTURE TIE template to make it:
My friend Jenny is like the female version of Barney Stint-
son because the other night she masterminded a way for
my buddy Tom to get some chicks number.

Many of your seductive character sketches will only be quick

one-liners that describe one or two details. However, when
appropriate, a seductive character sketch can be much longer
and elaborate.

For example, imagine if you just got back from a trip to Eu-
rope and wanted to briefly describe what it was like to travel
abroad for the first time. While you could tell that story as a
Seductive Structured Story, you could also tell it as a seduc-
tive character sketch saying:
Right from when I stepped off the plane and got in the
customs line, I felt giddy with excitement. Hearing the dif-
ferent languages on the loud speakers and seeing signs I
couldnt read and smelling the aireven the air smelt dif-
ferent!it was surreal. Like the only thing I can compare to
was the first time I went scuba diving because even though
Id seen underwater photography like a million times dur-

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 Part 2
ing Shark Week or whatever, to actually be thereunder-
waterand seeing all this crazy marine life swimming up
closeit felt like I was in a dream. And THATs what Eu-
rope was like! Id seen Europe a million times in movies
and my history textbooks, but to finally actually be there
experiencing it was awesome

Notice how that description of Europe doesnt contain a

plot. Im simply describing what it felt like to travel to a new
place. Often if I describe a vacation really well, using good de-
tails and metaphors, girls will often say, You make it sound
SO GOOD! I want to go now! The same goes for my favorite
foods, drinks, booksbasically if Im explaining why I like/dis-
like something, I dont just say:
My trip from Europe was great.

Instead, I try to convey WHY it was great using DETAILS, which

is the essence of a great seductive character sketch.

Pro Tip: Its often humorous and elicits emotions if you de-
scribe non-human things with human characteristics. I call this
the Pixar Effect (because Pixar makes movies about cars,
toys, and pandas who have human emotions/motivations).
For example, if you had a sexy-looking car that always needed
expensive repairs, you might say, My car is SUCH A DIVA! Its
like dating hot chicksure, she looks good and other guys see
it and get jealousbut shes always mad at me, throwing fits,
making me spend money on herand of course shes always

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 Part 2
got to look good, so Im on a first-name basis with the car-
wash people me and that car have a complicated, love-hate
relationship

Category 4: Seductive Thread Jacking

Used to tell: Add-ons/endings to her stories; stories
based on something she says
Elements Used: Usually Step 2 (conflict/details) and Step
3 (Resolutions)
Length: Very short to Medium (5-45 seconds)
What is thread jacking: One major caveat to any seductive
storyteller is that you dont want to hold court TOO MUCH. If
youre the ONLY one telling stories, coming off charming and
charismatic, then shes either going to feel intimidated/infe-
rior to you and/or that youre trying to entertain her because
youre insecure.

To circumvent that, you want to make her feel shes funny and
has great stories to tell. One of the best ways to do this is to
playfully jack the thread shes on. That means you help her
story along or help her tell it by injecting funny or interesting
details.

For example, say a woman was telling you a story about her
boss who is always on her case at work. While this story might
not be very interesting, you might invent a conflict for the
boss character and then detail it. For example:

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 Part 2
Wow that sucksdo you think its because he has a se-
cret, burning crush on you? Maybe hes really frustrated
because he wants to confess his feelings to you but hes
afraid youll report him for sexual harassment so he
goes home every night and stalks your Facebook then
stays up late drafting you long, gushy love letters that he
then tears up But that leaves him all sleep deprived the
next day so hes cranky and then he sees you and hes
reminded of his angst of his impossible love so thats
why hes acting like such a dick

If you do this right, women not only appreciate that youre

listening to them and considering their situation (even if its
from an absurd perspective) but (if you do this well) they also
usually jump on the thread and riff with you. For instance,
a girl might say, Oh my God! He DID friend me on Facebook!
Maybe he is stalking me! Then you could build on that, say-
ing, Yeah! He probably wants to like all your selfiesand
has to stop himself from writing comments like Beautiful! or
Youre gorgeous!

When done right, seductive thread jacking is a VERY POWER-

FUL seductive story because it makes the storytelling process
into a game for you and a woman to enjoy playing. You can
turn a boring story about her dickhead boss into a 10-minute
back-and-forth joke session that creates TONS of inside jokes
that connect you and her even more.

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 Part 2
Much as I hate to admit it, this is one of the most effective
ways to destroy a guy a girl is dating, a recent ex-boyfriend
still contacting her, and even her boyfriend. For example, a
girl I wanted to date once joked that she hoped her boyfriend
didnt secretly follow her to Las Vegas while she was there
hanging out with me. So I jacked her thread and said

What?! No way! I hope he DOES follow you to Vegas! Hed

probably see us walking out of the lobby of the Venetian
holding hands and realize how much hed taken you for
granted. Hed probably break into a Bruno Mars song on
the spotstart telling you how he wished hed bought
you flowers and held your hand and took you to every
partythen of course hed have to get even with me
so hed pull some old school move, like challenge me to a
dualand then Id have to worry that I might be mortally
wounded in a dual by some guy whod just sang a Bruno
Mars songs in the lobby of the Venetian. So maybe I should
be the one hoping we dont run into your boyfriend in Ve-
gas!

All she supplies is his motivation and then I jack the thread
with conflicts and resolutions. If this is NOT clear to you, lets
break out the motivations, conflicts, and resolutions of this
seductive thread jack

Motivation: Boyfriend follows girlfriend to Vegas to spy on her

Conflict and Consequence: Seeing her with another guy mak-

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ing him realize how hed taken her for granted
Resolution: Trying to win her back by singing a Bruno Mars
song in the lobby of the Venetian

2nd Conflict and Consequence: Needing revenge on the new

guy
2nd Resolution: Challenging him to a dual

3rd Conflict and Consequence*: MY fear of being killed in a dual

by guy who sang Bruno Mars in public
3rd Resolution: How I hope not to see the boyfriend in Vegas

*Notice how the conflict/resolutions shift from HER BOY-

FRIEND to ME. An excellent way to bring another character
into a story (or, in this case, bring the story back to me) is to
explain how the new character has a conflict AS A RESULT OF
the primary characters motivation/conflict(s).

37
Par t 2c : A vo i d O b v i o us a nd Pas s ive
The Two Killers of
a Seductive Story

A
s with many other aspects of seduction, telling obvi-
ous, predictable, every other guy stories will not
excite women or turn them on. As a general rule, if
a woman can guess how your story is going to end
just by hearing your teaser, its probably a weak sto-
ry.

The biggest problem most guys have with storytelling is that

they tell boring, obvious stories. Their stories never stand out
to a woman because shes already heard dozens of other guys
tell a variation of the same story. You can probably even think of
some of these obvious stories
When you got drunk and something crazy (yet predict-
able) happened to you
When you lost your virginity to your girlfriend
When you landed your job after working hard in college

There are two big reasons most stories are boring:

1. Obvious details/motivations
2. Passive characters/conflicts

In the next section youre going to learn 2 of the 3 elements of

storytelling is determining what a character wants (element 1)
and describing his quest to get it (element 2). Most guys com-
pletely screw this up by picking obvious motivations and/or de-
scribing a passive quest.

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 Part 2
For example, imagine a story about your friend who just got
back from a trip to Thailand. Most guys would probably say
his motivation for going was to see the world or went for
work with motivations like that, how interesting can the
story possibly be? Unless something VERY unexpected hap-
pened while he was there, that story is probably going to suck.
In fact, as you can probably guess, the second part of that sto-
ry would probably be and he saw a crazy burlesque show!
or he said they have the spiciest food there!

When a characters motivation for traveling to Thailand is an

obvious reason like seeing the world or going for work,
its NOT interesting because thats why ALMOST EVERYONE
travels to Thailand (or at least thats why they say they do). An
OBVIOUS motivation almost always leads to a PASSIVE charac-
ter. Simply seeing a show or eating spicy food are things
that HAPPENED to him. He wasnt active in making his fate
he simply watched something and ate something

While Im not advocate lying by inventing fake motivations

for your stories, you should identify a less obviousand more
interestingmotivation for your friends trip. This usually
takes more thought than simply going with the first thing that
comes to mind. The reason your friend gave for going to Thai-
land was probably obvious, so if you wanted to tell that story,
youd want to pinpoint a less obvious motivation for why he
took his trip

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 Part 2
maybe you think back a few months prior to his trip and re-
member him talking about a YouTube clip of a crazy Thai bur-
lesque show and you could tell from the way he described it
that he found it more than just interesting

maybe hes a masochist for eating the spiciest foods and

he heard Thailand had a pepper so spicy that its outlawed in
most other countries

or maybe he just realized how boring his life had become

and decided to go to Thailand to do 2 things that scared the
hell out of him...

Once the motivation for telling a story becomes less obvious,

it usually makes the character and his decisions more active.
However, you still want your character ACTING THROUGH
a decision rather than stuff just happening to him. If your
friend got mugged in a back alley of Thailand after the bur-
lesque show, theres two ways you could describe it:

My friend should have been more careful in Thailand. Af-

ter the burlesque show ended, he was walking in a back al-
ley and got mugged. [Passive: Getting mugged just hap-
pened to him; his fate was NOT a product of his actions]

My friends always bragging about the rush he gets from

walking down shadowy alleyways and dark streets, but in
Thailand that attitude finally came back to bite him in the

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ass when he got himself mugged. [Active: He CAUSED
himself to get mugged because hes a thrill-seeker; his
actions DETERMINED his fate]

Also, as the example above demonstrates, FLAWED charac-

ters often have more interesting motivations, leading to more
active decisions. When a character wants somethingeven if
what he wants comes from a personality flawit heightens
the emotional impact of your story. A story about a flawless
superman is almost NEVER interesting. (Thats why even Su-
perman has kryptonite.) A story about a character with a flaw
that causes him to desire something strongly, which leads to
actions that determine whether or not he gets what he de-
sires IS interesting.

Finally, because the seductive stories youre going to be tell

women will mostly be about your life and the people in it, you
dont have to think describing a flawed character is the same
thing as badmouthing people or throwing them under the bus.
A flaw can also be a positive trait like, My sister is such a over-
achiever or even My boss likes me so much

When I use the word flaw, Im simply referring to something

that causes a strong motivation or desire. Maybe your sisters
over-achieving flaw was why she wanted to plan the per-
fect surprise party for your parents. Or your bosss flaw of
liking you so much motivated him to yell at your companys IT
department after they reported you for accidently visiting a

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porn site on your work computer.

So, the formula for making your stories interesting is:

Flawed character + Non-obvious motivation/desire/goal

(as a result of flaw) + Actions that actively determine charac-
ters fate

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 Part 3
What Makes a Story
sT eductiv
3-E
he S
e
lement ystem for
Flawless STORYTELLING
 Pa r t 3 A : m o t i vat io n
What A character wants
is the Seed of a Story

T
he first question to ask yourself whenever youre try-
ing to describe a character, begin a story, or uncover
someones motivation is this: WHAT DOES THE CHAR-
ACTER WANT?

As discussed in the last section, most people answer this ques-

tion with the obvious. If a story is about a first kiss, the obvi-
ous answer is: The character WANTS his first kiss...

...and this is EXACTLY why most stories are boring and most peo-
ple are bad storytellers!

If you want to makes your a story stand out, drill down a level
deeper than the obvious. So, for example, you may be telling a
first kiss story, so obviously you wanted a kiss, but WHY did you
want it?
Maybe it was to impress your friends or to see what it
was like, or...
Maybe it was because you finally wanted to kiss your
crush, or...
Maybe it was during a Truth or Dare game and you didnt
want to seem like a nerd by chickening out, or...
Maybe it was with the girl next door because she said
she saw it in a movie and you secretly wanted to be a
movie star and thought learning to kiss would be impor-
tant for your future career...

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If you STILL cant think of a non-obvious motivation you may

have had for your first kiss, then try this: think of a story about
your first FAILED first kiss. As discussed, this displays cool
vulnerability and, in all likelihood, probably makes for a fun-
nier and more interesting story than a first kiss story depicting
a character with an obvious motivation.

I know for myself, when a woman asks me about losing my

virginity, since the REAL story is kinda bland and straightfor-
ward (lost it to my girlfriend when I was 17 at a house party
yawn!), I usually give a quick SUMMARY of that story and then
say...
But a better story is when I ALMOST lost my virgin-
ity in the back of a McDonalds parking lot and tell
THAT story instead.

Remember, youre NOT really swapping facts about your life,

youre SWAPPING EMOTIONS through storytelling. How I act-
ed the time I almost lost my virginity is more telling of who I
am than taking my girlfriend upstairs to a bedroom at a house
party.

Also, dont forget what you learned about flawed charac-

ters. Youll often discover your characters non-obvious de-
sires/motivations/wants/goals when you determine their flaw.
You should already know a flaw doesnt HAVE TO be some-
thing negative...its simply something in someones personal-

45
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ity that makes them WANT something more than normal.

Though, just because a character has a flaw, and EVEN IF that

flaw IS negative, that doesnt mean your listener wont sympa-
thize with him. In fact, having a flaw is often what helps listen-
ers relate to and care about characters in stories! (If you want
an example, just think of every memorable character ever...)

Two other concepts that will help you pinpoint attention-grab-

bing characters and their non-obvious motivations are...

The stakes: The emotional impact of any story is heightened

whenever theres JEOPARDY. A story about your friend in Ve-
gas playing $1 on a slot machine is much less interesting than if
hed sold all his possessions and cleaned out his life savings to
play it on one hand in blackjack. In that Vegas gambling anal-
ogy, the stakes are obvious yet I broke the non-obvious
rule to make sure you get the point: the higher the stakes,
the more you want to hear what happens.

Just because the stakes in your story are less obvious, it doesnt
mean they have to have less emotional impact. The ability to
make even the most trivial goal or quest sound as if theres A
LOT at stake is a quality every great storyteller shares.

You may be telling a story about your friend who asked out a
coworker he had a big crush on, which may SEEM like a low
stakes story...but if you explain how much your friend had

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been talking about her, how you caught him doodling her
name on the back of napkins, how he confessed to check-
ing her Facebook profile every 10 minutesall of sudden the
stakes are raised!

Make sure the listener REALLY FEELS that your character is put-
ting himself in JEOPARDY by pursuing his goal. If your stakes
arent defined or it sounds like theres not much at stake, your
listener wont care about what happens...theres NOTHING to
care about!

Thus, when determining your characters goals and motiva-

tions ask yourself these questions:
What does the character stand to gain if the goal is ac-
complished? What could be lost?
How would this effect the characters emotions or even
the characters life?
What SPECIFIC details DRAMATIZE the stakes?

Pro Tip: Its human nature to be more interested in what a

character stands to lose rather than what could be gained.
If I were telling the story about my friend with the coworker
crush, I probably wouldnt say, He knew that if she said yes,
his head would explode from happiness overloadinstead,
Id probably say, He knew that if she said no, hed probably
have to rush himself to the nearest therapist or else he was
going to hurl himself off the top floor of his office building...

47
 Part 3
Strong opinions/expectations: In addition to a personality
flaw, you can quickly bring your characters to life and add
depth to a story by giving a character strong opinions and/
or unrealistic expectations. You can even make a characters
opinions or expectations the storys focus, which sets 3 types
of plots you can choose from:
1. The conflict the character faces is worse because of
a strong opinion/expectation, e.g. a story about your
straight-edge uncle who HATED drugs and hippies but
accidently ended up at Woodstock because his girlfriend
at the time told him it was a camping trip
2. The opinion/expectation is reversed, e.g., a story about
a summer internship you thought was going to jump-
start your career, but turned out to be an excuse for the
30-somethings in middle management to sexually ha-
rass unsuspecting college kids
3. The characters opinion/expectation is validated against
the odds, e.g., a story about your friend who was con-
vinced he was going to buy his first house with Vegas
money and despite everyone telling him not to, played
one hand of blackjack in which he bet everything he owned
on it, and won, then used his winnings to buy a house

You may have noticed that having a strong opinion or unre-

alistic expectation increases the stakes of a characters goal.
When a character feels strongly about something or really be-
lieves in something, that puts the character in greater jeop-
ardyeven if (especially if!) the opinion/expectation is not an

48
 Part 3
opinion or expectation a normal person (like you or your lis-
tener) would share with the character...or at least not at that
moment in time.

Pro Tip: A great way to demonstrate some cool vulnerabil-

ity and to connect with a woman is to tell a few stories where
YOUR strong opinions/expectations are reversed. This is es-
pecially good for nostalgic/childhood stories, but it also works
well for stories that happened recently because it demon-
strates that youre open-minded and man enough to recog-
nize when youre wrong/mistaken about the world

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Par t 3b: c o n f l i c t a n d c o ns equenc e
When a Character Struggles
the Storys Heart Beats

O
nce youve determined what motivates your sto-
rys character, that character must ACTIVELY ven-
ture into the world and act through his motivation.
This is called the quest and its the second ele-
ment of storytelling, requiring you to answer these
questions: WHAT CHALLENGES MUST YOUR CHARACTER OVER-
COME IN HIS QUEST TOWARD HIS GOAL? HOW DOES YOUR
CHARACTER HANDLE THESE CONFLICTS? WHAT ARE THE CON-
SEQUENCES OF THOSE ACTIONS?

Conflict DEFINES a story, makes it interesting, and will be what

you spend the most time describing. Again, most boring stories
suck because they mistake storytelling for reporting. A so-
called story about a first kiss where you smooched your ju-
nior high girlfriend at the end of a date actually isnt a story at
all. Its simply a fact, a report. To state it again, conflicts bring
your story to life. Your character(s) HAS to encounter some form
of conflict for there to be ANY emotional impact...and ideally a
threatening one.

This doesnt mean the conflict needs to be some epic face-off or

even a direct confrontation. Some stories will have those mo-
ments. But a lot of your stories will find their conflicts in more
subtle (and less obvious) struggles.

For example, if the story about your first kiss seems as simple as

50
 Part 3
smooching your junior high girlfriend at the end of a date, start
racking your brain and memory for MORE DETAILSlike: were
you nervous before you kissed her? Did she have bad breath?
Did you suddenly pop a boner right before it happened? Were
you afraid of her parents catching you?

Even if the threat was minor when the events of your sto-
ry actually happened, by dramatizing conflicts you transform
what youre saying into something INTERESTING because it
keeps the main characters goal in JEOPARDY. Will you or will
you not get the kiss? The suspense keeps your listener at the
edge of her seat.

Again, the more time you think this over, the better your sto-
ries will be. If you think of a REALLY interesting conflict that
really threatens your characters goal, that story is going to
captivate a womans full attention. If your conflict is obvious
and easily overcome, more than likely that story is going to be
uninteresting and will quickly lose a listeners interest.

Not only should a conflict engage a listener, it also should be

used to change your character in some way. Even if its a mi-
nor change, every conflict should have an effect on both the
character and the direction of the story. If you let a character
walk away from a conflict without changing it means one of
two things:
The way youre describing that character is one-dimen-
sional

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 Part 3
The conflict wasnt significant and so it wasnt worth
putting in the story

Finally, the aftermath of a conflict is CONSEQUENCE. Every

story conflict must have a corresponding consequence. As in
life, your characters must account for their actions and deci-
sions. As the storyteller, its up to you to determine the conse-
quences a conflict will have on your character and his quest.

A conflicts primary purpose is to change/reveal a character:

Drama and hardship is what reveals your characters. Said in a
different way, if youve read any of my dating advice, you prob-
ably know I define confidence/charisma as a trait revealed in
moments of adversary and struggle. Its easy to be the man
when a girl is laughing at everything you say and telling you
how amazing you are. You may feel like a million bucks in those
moments, but it says nothing about whether youre actually
confident

TRUE confidence is on display when a girl is giving you shit yet

you manage to keep your cool and laugh it off. Conversely, if
a guy crumbles or throws a tantrum when a girl is giving him
a hard time, that also tells you a lot about his confidence (or
lack thereof) and it shows what hes REALLY like.

The same is true for a character in a story. When you describe

how a character deals with a challenge or problem you give
your listener a much better sense of who youre describing,

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which will make your stories more interesting and pack a great-
er emotional punch.

In a longer story, theres likely to be several conflicts. Each

conflict causes the character to do something that has a con-
sequence, which leads to the next conflict. This cycle con-
tinues until theres a resolution. Heres the multi-conflict story
formula broken down:

Motivation > Action > Conflict > Reaction to conflict >

Consequence > New/revised motivation as a result of
consequence (optional) > 2nd Action > 2nd Conflict >
2nd Reaction to conflict > 2nd Consequence.and so
on until the resolution.

Conflicts may only confront the main character or they may

get passed off to another character in your story. For example,
you may tell a story about a time you and your friend went on
a double date. Because your friend is a prankster and wanted
to impress his girl, he decided to taunt a group of bikers hang-
ing out front of a seedy dive bar. And because he screamed
profanities at them while hanging out of the passenger side
of your car, the bikers got YOUR license plate number. When
you drove home later that night, the bikers were gathered in
front of your house, waiting for you

Notice how your friends conflict (how to impress a girl) ended

up creating a conflict for you (a gang of angry bikers at your

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 Part 3
house). If this were a storytelling course to teach you how to
write novels or screenplays, youd make sure that EVERY con-
flict and scene is relevant to the story. In seductive storytell-
ing, you have some wiggle room to add details, conflicts, and
scenes that may not be totally relevant to your story (as long
as those details are entertaining and add to the vibe).

That said, the VAST MAJORITY of your conflicts should:

1. Reveal something about a character
2. Move the story toward a resolution

Ideally, the conflicts you choose do BOTH. So, to return to

the biker story, lets say the bikers surrounded your car and
forced you out. You were sure they were going to beat you to
a pulp because you always stereotyped bikers as bloodthirsty
thugs. In spite of your fear, you somehow managed to crack
a joke that got the bikers to laugh. Once they were laughing,
you were able to explain the situation and talk them down.
The story resolves with the bikers reversing your expectations
when they turn out to be really sensitive, nice guys who ex-
plain that your friends heckle was really cruel, really hurt
and that they just want to be treated with respectis that
too much to ask?

In that example, each conflict builds toward the final resolu-

tion: reversing your expectations of bikers. Even though there
were probably other conflicts you could have added to the
story, you only chose the conflicts most relevant to the reso-

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lution. If you wanted to stretch that story (per accordion the-
ory) there may have been conflicts that were semi-relevant
that you COULD add like:
The girls freaked out after your friend heckled the bik-
ers and immediately wanted to be taken home but you
convinced them to stay
Your friend wanted to go back and heckle the bikers a
second time, which caused you and him to get into a
brief argument
Your friend had pranked another group of bikers that
night, which led to a brief car chase

Those conflicts may be interesting, but if they dont reveal any-

thing new about the characters or move toward the resolution,
theyre unnecessary. For example, a car chase may sound like
a cool detail to add, but your friends prankster personality
flaw was already revealed in the first conflict, so showing him
pranking more bikers doesnt add much to the story.

Thus, these details are best left out or added in only after a
listener REALLY enjoyed the original streamlined story. Often
the best way to do this is, after you give the resolution, you can
tell her the bonus conflicts after a transition statement like,
Thats not the only crazy thing that happened that night

Consider the source of a conflict: Most of the conflicts in a

story come from the characters antagonist. This is a person
or thing standing in the way of what the character wants. Two

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of the best sources to draw conflicts from are:
1. A character facing something in himself (e.g., overcom-
ing a fear)
2. An opponent

While an opponent doesnt always have to be a person, for se-

ductive storytelling purposes, it usually helps if the opponent
has human qualities. For example, I have a story about a
time I got cock-blocked by a girls Chihuahua, but when I de-
scribe the dog I make it seem like the dog possessed human
characteristics.

Just like your character has a goal or want, good opponents

should also have a goal or want. Its tempting to just assume
an opponent has the same goal as your character (e.g., a guy
who is chasing the same girl as you) or the opposite goal (e.g.,
the boss trying to make you work late to finish a project even
though you have a date), but it REALLY helps a story if the op-
ponent has a more sinister motivation for antagonizing your
character.

For example, what if your boss KNEW you had a date but he
held some weird belief that celibacy makes people more pro-
ductive, so he wanted to ruin your social life in an attempt to
mold you into a subservient office drone.

Adding complex (non-obvious) motivations to your storys

opponents makes those opponents dynamic and interesting.

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You can probably think of movies or books where a villain was
more memorable than the good guy. Moreover, a menacing
opponent dramatizes the conflict. The more of a challenge
the opponent presents, the greater the jeopardy, and so the
more your character will have to struggle, which will make for
a better story.

Even if a storys conflict doesnt come from an opponent, it

should still be convincing. Remember, people like hearing
about active characters whose actions and decisions lead them
to challenges. A character who just reacts to coincidences and
random events is a victimand victims dont make for good
stories.

Thats why even if youre going to describe how a character is

dragged into a conflict by someone elses actions, it helps to
add a quick detail to show how its at least partly due to the
characters actions, as well. So, in the biker example, that de-
tail could be that before your friend heckled the bikers, you
dared him to do itor that you offered to get the car close
enough so theyd hear the heckleor even something as sub-
tle as not immediately speeding away because you were laugh-
ing so hard (which would also explain how the bikers got your
license plate number!) would work for that story.

Ive heard writing advice that advocates starting from the end
of a story for this specific reason. When you start with the res-
olution, the conflicts in your story flow backward. You simply

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need to answer the question: what conflict(s) are best to show
my character moving to toward the resolution? (Were going
to explain this more in the next section on resolution.)

Your characters comfort zone: Whenever a story has a char-

acter outside of his comfort zone, it heightens the drama and
connects with your listener. Simply describing a character do-
ing something uncomfortable and/or scary to him, especially
when its against all odds, is usually enough to make him inter-
esting and admirable. It doesnt matter if a character is suc-
cessfulthe mere act of TRYING is enough.

Most people (including attractive women) beat themselves

up for getting things wrong or letting their comfort zone limit
them, and so thats why a listener will REALLY sympathize with
characters that screw up (bravely) or get something wrong
(courageously). Describing a character pushing outside his
comfort zone is a surefire way to dramatize his vulnerability
especially the emotional aspects of it.

As an example, you might describe how nervous you were to

quit a cushy job when you decided to become a full-time free-
lancer. To really dramatize how vulnerable you felt before go-
ing through with your decision, you may add details like how
you put off telling your boss, that you were waking up from
nightmares of having to move back in your parents, etc. Keep
in mind: stories are about change and often change happens
when someone steps outside their comfort zone. Identifying

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a customers comfort zone, and then describing THE EXACT
MOMENT that character stepped out of it, usually makes for
interesting storieseven if the character didnt succeed.

The final word on conflicts is remember NOT to just gloss over

a conflict or simply state it like a fact, e.g., I was really nervous
before my first kiss because I didnt know what to expect. In-
stead, pack your stories with emotion by pinpointing SPECIFIC
episodes, events, and scenes that SHOW the conflict. WORK
THE DETAILS! It dramatizes a conflict like throwing gas on a
fire!

For example, if you were really nervous before your kiss, using
a detail or two to highlight that will make your story pop. For
example, you might try to identify something that happened
as you prepared yourself for the unexpectedlike an event
or scenethat REALLY demonstrates that.

For example, maybe your equally inexperienced friend thought

itd be a good idea you take a condom with you just in case
and so you had it in your pocket but right as you were about
to kiss your junior high girlfriend the condom fell out of your
pocket, she noticed, and freaked out. This scene is a bit ridicu-
lous, but it demonstrates an important point:

WHEN YOU THINK OF CONFLICT, THINK OF SPECIFIC

SCENES AND MOMENTS! THINK OF DETAILS! (...more
on this later, in the Seductive Details section...)

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 P a r t 3 C : R e s o lutio n
the result of the characters quest
causes change and gives a story focus

A
fter youve detailed your characters struggles to-
ward his goal, you need to resolve listeners ten-
sion with a resolution, a.k.a., the ending. Rest as-
sured, your listeners tension will be HIGH if shes
heard about an active character in a story with well-
defined stakes and intense conflicts. Once the dust settles, the
two final questions you need to answer are: DID THE CHARAC-
TER GET WHAT HE WANTED? AND REGARDLESS IF HE WAS SUC-
CESSFUL IN HIS QUEST, HOW DID IT CHANGE HIM?

The quests outcome is far less important than how a character

changed AS A RESULT OF that outcome. Thats because its only
when you know how your character changed that you know
what your story was/is ABOUT. This change puts your story
into focus and gives it meaning. In fact, describing a CHANGE is
the REASON people tell stories!

The ONLY exception to this rule is when the POINT of a story is

that the character didnt change DESPITE facing conflict(s). An
example would be a story in which a characters belief or value
is tested by conflictand is proved to be either right or useful.

Let me explain

One story I enjoy telling women explains why one of my values

is: Living well is the best revenge. The story describes the time

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I ran into my college ex-girlfriend in a diner. My motivation in
that story was to embarrass her by revealing that I knew shed
cheated on me (she didnt realize that I knew that). To raise
the stakes of the story, I dramatize how hurt Id been 7 years
before, when shed dumped me and so Id been fantasizing
about seeing her again ever since Id learned about her cheat-
ing.

Subtle (but dramatized) conflicts ensue, like how she talked

down to me as if I were still the loser she dated 7 years ago,
and how she introduced me to her current boyfriend in a rude
way. Each conflict brings me closer to acting on my desire to
embarrass her by calling her out for cheating

but I hold back. The final conflict comes when I tell her Im
now writing dating advice. A look of shock comes over her
face that tells me that she knewjust KNEW! that I was no
longer the loser shed dated and dumped 7 years ago. My life
had become totally different and hers was obviously still the
same. Even though I did NOT succeed in my quest (to embar-
rass her), because I saw that look on her face, I realized just
how right I was/am to believe, Living well is the best revenge.

The point of the story was that I was right: my decision to

actively improve my life WAS the best revenge (which the
shocked look on her face proved). Though, thats only ONE
type of story. In other types of stories characters DO change
in some way. Some ways characters change in a seductive sto-

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ries are by:
Discovering something (e.g., a piece of information)
that helps/hurts them in some way
Gaining a new perspective, attitude, or belief
Deciding to pursue/give up a lifestyle (e.g. start a new
career, quit smoking)
Ending/beginning a relationship

To illustrate how a character might change in a seductive sto-

ry, I will again return to my ex-girlfriend with another example.
This story goes back 7 years, beginning when shed dumped
me, and explains how I learned shed cheated. Her behavior
had been sketchy for the weeks leading up to our breakup,
which made me obsessed with trying to figure out why her
feelings changed so suddenly. My motivation was to uncov-
er the truth about our relationship because I wanted clo-
sure...

I run into conflict when I go on my quest for truth when I

realize the password to her personal email had automatical-
ly gotten stored on my computer. I struggle internally as to
whether I can ethically bring myself to invade her privacy
by logging into her email account. I end up doing it and find a
letter addressed to her friend where she brags about cheat-
ing on me and cruelly adds that she doesnt feel bad about it
because, Robs such a loser.

My character changes upon realizing I dont understand

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women at all. Id always thought I was average with girls,
but reading my exs letter made me realize I wasnt even
thatI WAS a loserwhich eventually led me to study dating
advice

Notice how I succeeded in my quest (to uncover the truth

about my ex) but it wasnt what I expected. It didnt give me
closure...it actually made me realize something bad about my-
self: that I was a LOSER! In the long run it was a good thing (be-
cause it led to dating advice, which changed my life), I always
dramatize how hurt I was at that moment, sitting in front of
the computer, feeling like a pathetic, cheated-on loser. A story
turn-around like this (a.k.a., be careful what you wish for) is
a bit of an advanced concept, but worth mentioning.

When a story ends ironically like this, with a character succeed-

ing but not finding happiness, it usually makes things more
interesting. Sometimes what we think we want actually hurts
us. On the other hand, the living well is the best revenge
story is a mirror image of that turn around. I may have failed
in my quest but I gained something because of it: my belief
was reinforced.

If you wanted to take it a step even FURTHER, in the living

well is the best revenge story, acting ethically (holding my-
self back from calling out my ex) is why I failed in my quest
but was still happy at the end of the story; in the Im a loser
story, I acted unethically (allowed myself to invade someones

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privacy), which made my quest successful but it wasnt the
success (closure) I thought it would be so Im left feeling like a
loser at the end of the story. That twist hints at something
like karma, which adds yet another level of depth. Of course,
your seductive stories CERTAINLY do NOT have to go THAT
deepI just point it out as an advanced concept (and because
Im a nerd).

To ideas for your own stories, look for a time something

changed in your life...you can usually find these ideas when-
ever you say a phrase like
Thats why I never
Thats why I always
That was the moment I realized
Ill never do that again because

Oh, and dont think every story has to be about a profound,

philosophical change! Humorous and lighthearted stories of-
ten involve a superficial or even sarcastic change, like, Thats
how atrocious became my fifth favorite word in the Eng-
lish language! or That was the moment I realized that
my brother is totally fucking awesome! (Pro tip: Pausing for
dramatic effect when describing a humorous realization really
helps with the delivery!)

Another great way to use change in a seductive story is it play-

ing down a story about your life that could be misunderstood
as an attempt to brag. While we advocate displaying plenty of

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cool vulnerability in your stories, if you lead a cool life and/or
have interesting accomplishments, there obviously will come
a time to tell stories that explain those aspects of your life.

Just a quick aside, when telling women things that might af-
fect the vibe (usually very positive or negative aspects of your
life), storytelling REALLY helps smooth it over. For example,
for a long time I avoided telling women I was an entrepreneur
because it sometimes intimidated women. They seemed to
get the impression that I was some jet-setting rich dude that
couldnt relate to them. But once I began explaining how I be-
came an accidental entrepreneur by using a story, not only
did it NOT disrupt the vibemany women have said, The way
you describe it makes ME want to become an entrepreneur,
too! The goal of any storyteller should be to inspire others!

So when conveying flattering aspects of your life with stories,

heres a great technique:
Pair a character failing in his quest but resolve the story
with a positive change.

For example: a story about how you got kicked out of college
for computer hacking but that led you to a lucrative career
as a systems securities expert. And, for negative aspects of
your life, if you can find a positive change you call pull out of a
negative story, youll convey optimism and makes sense of
something a women might think is a red flag. For example,
maybe you got a divorce from a controlling woman and that

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made you realize to never again take your freedom for grant-
ed.

Now that you understand the 3 elements of storytelling, and

you hopefully realize the importance change plays in a sto-
ry, you should start reverse brainstorming story ideas from
your life. Think about moments where something significant
changed in your life (both serious and funny, both physical
and emotional) and try and recall the events that caused that
change. What characters were involved? What did they want?
Who were the opponents? What did THEY want? What conflict(s)
led up to the change? What finally resolved it? What about the
stakes? The jeopardy?

Another way to find good stories from your life is to make a

list of your values and beliefs. Then ask yourself: why do I be-
lieve/value this? What events in your life led you to believe
something like, Fortune favors the bold or, Everything in
moderation including moderation. You can also think of no
change stories when one of your values or beliefs was put to
the test during a conflict...and passed. Dont worry if you cant
think of a story for EVERY value or belief. Just use it to get the
ball rolling!

Finally, you can also discover inspiration by looking in the

middle. By that, I mean you can discover some great stories
by trying to recall memorable conflicts. Some of my BEST
story ideas come from remembering a moment where I faced

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a menacing opponent or found myself in a struggle, both in-
ternal and external. Sometimes these conflicts are obvious,
but often theyre subtle yet remain with me (but that could
also be because Im a little weird...).

Just as a quick example, for some reason my mind always

shifts back to this time I was 10 years old and annoying this
older kid who lived next door to me because I was begging
him to lend me a porno magazine. Even though this conflict
doesnt seem very significant, it stuck out to me for a long
time. One day I suddenly realized the seductive story poten-
tial of it: that minor conflict resolved with my defeat when my
neighbor told me, Fuck off and go make your own porn! but
that phrasemake your own pornperfectly described
how I was going to try and live my lifenot just in valuing real
sex over porn, but also in living ACTIVELY rather than just as a
spectator (which, hopefully you noticed, is what also makes a
good story character!).

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Adding seductive
D e tai l S
Perfect Descriptions Make
Stories PERFECT
 P a r t 4 A : s h o w , d o n t tel l
a story should be An
experience, not a report

I
f youve ever taken a creative writing course, the advice
show, dont tell was probably the first things you learned.
In our day-to-day lives, were accustomed to reporting
what happened when describing a person or event. If your
boss asks you why you were late to work, youd probably
TELL HIM that there was a traffic jam. But likely you would not
use it as an opportunity to launch into a narrative that SHOWS
him the traffic jam.

Simply reporting events is fine for most aspects of our lives.

However, when it comes to storytelling, reporting is NOT how
you want to do itespecially not during moments you want to
dramatize or characters you want to standout. Simply giving re-
ports (fact-by-fact accounts) does not elicit emotions nor does it
stick in listeners mind.

To make stories REALLY work, you need to think in terms of SE-

DUCTIVE DETAILS. There are 3 main types of Seductive Details
youll use in your stories:

SpecificsUsed to make the story sound more realistic, to

add unexpected humor, and/or to paint a word picture
that better allows a listener to experience what youre de-
scribing. Some examples of specifics are: listing specific
colors, sounds, smells, naming of people/places (even if
it seems irrelevant to the story), mentioning things that

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might seem as if they dont matter (e.g., the exact price
of something down to the cents)

ComparisonsUsed to convey abstract qualities (feel-

ings, character flaws), to add expected humor (with
pairings that are unlikely and/or unique), and/or to make
the story more relatable/understandable to the listener.
Some examples of specifics are: metaphors and similes,
pop culture references emotional grounding (i.e., I felt
like comparisons)

Style/plot accentsUsed to call attention to a part of

a story, point out an ironic twist, and add humor. Some
examples of style elements are: quirky phrasings, inter-
esting word choices, editorializing asides (e.g., opinions,
spoiler alerts), and inflated expectations

Start getting yourself in the habit of thinking in seductive de-

tails! To begin, focus on a moment in time you vividly remem-
berthen imagine ways you could pull a listener into the story
by describing a specific moment. Really try to create a word
experience with your details! Just ask yourself which of these
stories youd rather hear:

I remember this time I ALMOST lost my virginity in my

moms minivan in the parking lot of a McDonalds

I remember the time I ALMOST lost my virginity I was

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borrowing my moms big purple minivan known as, The
Mommy Mobileit was at the end of a long summer night
and I was dying of thirstso before going home I stopped
off at a McDonalds to grab an Oreo McFlurrybecause,
as we both know, McFlurrys are like the most delicious
concoction of frozen deliciousness known to manbut
when I pulled up to the pickup window, I was shocked to
see that the girl about to hand me this frozen treat was
actually pretty cute! She looked like a non-punk rock ver-
sion of Gwen Stefani, like if Gwen Stefani was just the cute
girl-next-dooretc

Most likely, youd MUCH rather hear the second story. Theres
more details that let you experience the story. The more a
listener can experience a story (and she WILL experience
it if you use the right seductive details), the more shell want
to hear more.

Just dont overdo it! Dont go overboard and feel like you need
to describe EVERYTHING. Theres 3 main ways to use seduc-
tive details:
1.) Accent something important
2.) Bring a scene to life
3.) Add humor/twists to a story

Now that you understand WHY youre going to use seductive

details, the next section will explain WHAT aspects of your
story TO use those details on.

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 P a r t 4 b : W h e r e to Add
Description Calls Attention
to moments that need it

T
he more you tell your stories, the better your seduc-
tive details will become for those stories. Youll start
to see what details work, what draws a listener in,
what makes her laugh, and what details are memora-
ble. Youll also realize what details are just fluff and
remove them.

Thats why once you have a few good stories, get yourself in the
habit of practicing them whenever you caneven if your audi-
ence isnt a hot woman. The more you tell a story, the sooner
youll know which details work and which dont.

Before getting into the nuts and bolts of seductive details, first
lets look at where are good places to add details in a story:

1. Charactersthe BEST characters to detail are either

part of the conflict (e.g., a girls pissed off dad) or a cat-
alyst to the resolution (e.g., your wingman). Later in
this section, youre going to learn what traits makes
characters stand out as either good (sympathetic) or
evil (unsympathetic) characters.

2. Scenesmuch of your stories will occur in either mini-

scenes (quick descriptions of what happened) and lon-
ger scenes (dramatic moments that require more than
just a brief description). Scenes will almost always de-

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pict a conflict or struggle of the story.

3. Feelingsespecially the characters feelings during

and/or after the conflict...while these descriptions
will usually focus on your own feelings, describing
other peoples feelings (or at least what you THINK
other people were feeling) works, as well. The EASI-
EST way to convey a feeling is through metaphor.

4. A bystander or crowds reactionthis can really

provide good context to a story and inject some un-
expected humor. Usually the crowd or bystanders
reaction should contradict the characters feelings
(e.g. if the story was about heckling a pitcher at a
baseball game, the crowd should be on the side of
the pitcher because that amplifies the conflict and
humor of the situation) OR ELSE the crowd/bystand-
ers reaction should change due to action in the sto-
ry (e.g., a story about the worst prom date ever
where your prom date hooked up with one of your
friends so you tried to drink away your sorrows,
causing you to puke in the rented limo, which en-
raged the limo driver, and he tried to make you pay
to have it cleaned but when you told him why you
were so drunk he took you to McDonalds, bought
you a Big Mac, and gave you life advice...)

5. The when of the storysometimes the season,

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month, day, or year that your story happened is im-
portant so its worth adding a detail to make it stand
out, but sometimes it works to simply throw in the
when because it adds some nostalgia (which gen-
erates rapport) as well as provides quick stand-by
jokes you can recycle for any story in that time pe-
riod (e.g., telling a story that takes place in the 80s
and saying, This was back in the 80s when no one
had stopped believing per the advice of Journey).

6. A placesometimes WHERE something happened

is important to the story. Keep the descriptions of a
place VERY brief (unless the story is about a place).
The best way to detail a place is by highlighting an
aspect or quality of the place most relevant to the
story (e.g., if you were describing a crazy dive bar
from your college years, you might say, This place
was so lax on checking IDs a note from my mom
would get me in.).

This 6-part list doesnt describe the ONLY parts of your story
where you can add details. However, because you dont want
to become a rambling storyteller, you dont want to start de-
tailing every little thing. Too much detail will distract a listener
from the point of the story and, more importantly, will slow
down the action (i.e., conflict).

Before moving into the storytellers toolbox that will give

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you turnkey ways to add details to your story, its important
to end this section by examining what traits make a character
either sympathetic or unsympathetic. Understanding these
traits will guide you in choosing details that best portray a
character or opponent in a way that makes sense for the story
youre telling.

While this list is primarily intended to help you craft your char-
acter descriptions (which will guide in choosing the right se-
ductive details), by understanding what makes someone in a
story either likable or unlikable, you can also apply these traits
to non-human things (e.g., a place, the reaction of a crowd,
even a period of time) to really dramatize the conflict of a sto-
ry. Heres the list with explanations:

Sympathetic Character Traits

The reluctant hero, also known as draftee versus volunteer,
is a character who is FORCED into being a hero. This usually
makes the character more sympathetic than someone who
volunteers. Just imagine the difference between a character
wants to be homecoming king because he WANTS it versus
a character whose friends who nominate him as a JOKE and
then he follows through with it because something in the sto-
ry compels him... (think: Luke Skywalker)

Bad boy struggling to be good, also known as the anti-

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hero, is a character who is SUCCESSFUL at being bad, but he
knows he should be good and so he tries to change his ways.
The BEST way to depict these characters is to first show how
successful they are at being BAD, and then contrast that with
how hard they struggle when trying to be GOOD. Imagine a
character who had made a fortune creating porn websites, but
gave it all up to work a boring entry-level office job because he
realized porn was unethical.

The underdog, depicts an everyman character who attempts

to go against the odds to accomplish something great. Some
of the most memorable and inspiration characters are under-
dogs (e.g., Rocky, Rudy). An underdogs quest doesnt always
have to be some epic Cinderella story...it can be as simple as
your overweight friend who decided to run a marathon de-
spite everyone laughing at him. Whenever a character fights
the good fight in spite of the odds, its almost impossible for
a listener not to sympathize with him.

Admired/loved by others, an easy way to show a characters

positive qualities is by showing how others admire and love
them. Whether we admit it to ourselves or not, we often let
other peoples opinions shape how we view someone. So, for
example, if you explain how everyone in your college town
knew your friend Mike by name and loved him, the listener
probably assume Mike is a likable, sympathetic guy.

Follows through on his obligation/promise, if a character is

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true to his word, especially when it may cause him difficulty or
pain, that character is immediately likable. An example from
my own life would be a caring former boss of mine who stood
by his girlfriend after she got a fatal disease.

Has a dream/hope that is unrealized (usually larger scale than

motivation), because most people have higher aspirations
than what theyre currently doing, characters who also have
big dreams or desires are relatable and likable. The big dream
of a character is often larger scale than what motivates them
in your story, yet it can trickle down to a micro-motivation.
An example would be if you wanted to be a rock singer (big
dream), which made you want to win a local Battle of the
Bands (micro-motivation).

Shows mercy, whenever a character has an opportunity to

make an opponent suffer, but decides not to, the listener will
sympathize with the merciful character. Mercy does not
usually mean physical pain in the stories you will tell. For exam-
ple, remember in my Living Well is The Best Revenge story, I
simply resist the temptation to embarrass my ex-girlfriend by
calling her out for cheating.

Makes people (e.g., the listener) laugh, finally the ability to

make a listener laugh is often such a strong sympathetic quality
that it overrides everything else. A character whose actions or
dialogue is so funny that it elicits laughter from a listener usu-
ally can only be seen as sympathetic. Just think of a character

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like Tucker Max who is a notorious jerk, possessing almost NO
sympathetic qualities, yet he has legions of fans because hes
FUNNY when acting unsympathetic. The difficulty of describ-
ing sympathetic characters through humor is that YOU need
to convey their hilarity. EVEN IF a character IS hilarious, and
he CAN get everyone laughing, if YOU fail to get the listener
laughing, then the story probably wont work.

Unsympathetic Antagonist Traits

Sadist (enjoys cruelty, takes pleasure in causing pain), one of
the easiest ways to cast an antagonist in an unsympathetic
light is to show him or her enjoying making/watching other
people suffer. You have seen this a thousand times in movies...
just think of the moment the bad guy is about to hurt or kill
someone, but he hesitates because he wants to enjoy the kill
even more (usually he says something or the camera zooms in
to show his pleasure in what hes about to do). Hopefully the
stories from your life dont involve people who enjoy physical-
ly hurting others, but this trait still works with emotional pain,
too. Imagine a college professor who chuckles as he informs
you that you failed his class.

Reputation (history of doing bad), as you can imagine, many

of the unsympathetic traits will simply be negations of sympa-
thetic qualities. Thus, just as a good character is admired, if
your unsympathetic characters are feared and hated by others

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it will set them up as unlikable. For instance: the college pro-
fessor who is notoriously hated on campus because hes been
rumored to fail students simply because he finds it funny.

Enjoys/hopes others fail, the old told ya so antagonist is

never sympathetic. When someone gets pleasure from watch-
ing others fail, its very easy to hate that person. Just as the
listener admires characters who try, she will dislike opponents
who want to see others fail. This trait is probably one youll
use a lot since a lot of great personal stories involve overcom-
ing haters who want to see you fail.

Condescending/pretentious, whenever someone talks down

to another person, theyre immediately pegged as an asshole.
Opponents who think/behave as if theyre better than the
characters they are in conflict with are almost always seen as
villains. An opponents condescending nature can come out in
a few different ways: through dialogue, by the way they treat
others, or just how little respect they have for other characters.

Undeserved position/status, just think of the first impression

you get when you hear someone is a trust fund brat or the
vice president of daddys company. It probably angers or frus-
trastes you whenever you hear about someone in an unearned
position of wealth or status. To make these antagonists even
more unsympathetic show how their undeserved position of
power brings out unsympathetic qualities (e.g., the lotto win-
ner who becomes condescending toward poor people).

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Hellbent on exacting senseless revenge, while wanting re-
venge is a human emotion, and weve all felt it at some point,
characters who are obsessed with revenge (and especially for
unjustified reasons) are hard to sympathize with.

Bully (picks on the weak, exploits position), no one likes a

bully. While very few people think of themselves AS bullies,
you probably encounter bullies every day. The defining trait of
a bully is someone who picks on an easy target. The obvious
playground bully attacks the skinny kid who cant defend him-
self; in the adult world, bullies usually exploit their position of
power (e.g., the traffic cop who threatens to arrest you for
not wearing a seatbelt) or they use something they do well/a
talent to pick on an innocent everyman who doesnt have
that talent (e.g., a college professor who humiliates his stu-
dents when they misunderstand something).

No loyalty, these are the traitors, cheaters, and promise-breakers.

When someone goes back on their word or violates a trust, the knee-
jerk response is not to like them. Loyalty is a universally valued trait,
and so antagonists who lack loyalty are instantly seen as scumbags.

Other: a possession that echoes villainy, a great storytelling

device is to add a detail associated with the antagonist that
mirrors his unsympathetic trait(s). Obvious examples might
be the condescending rich guys loud, banana-yellow Porsche
with a self-promoting vanity plate or the sadistic bosss pet
snake that only eats live mice.

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 P a r t 4c : S t o r y t e l l i n g To o lb o x
Plug-in Templates That will make
a story instantly seductive

F
inally, time for the fun stuff: SEDUCTIVE DETAILS! Often
when I teach storytelling on a live program, students fix-
ate on the details. Its no surprising this is the case...de-
tails are what to say to make a story good. It would
seem this is the secret to being a captivating storyteller...

...by now, however, you should know that the emotional rele-
vance of a great story doesnt come from a string of magic words
or phrases...

Instead, seductive stories come from your understanding and

application of specific storytelling elements. Your stories will ei-
ther live or die in how well you convey a character and his op-
ponent, the quest and its stakes, the conflicts and resulting con-
sequences, and, ultimately, a resolution that somehow changes
your character...

That said, better details ALWAYS make for better stories! There
is no exception to this rule; its a simply an immutable storytell-
ing law:

Great Details = Great Stories; Bad Details = Bad Stories

Thats because EVERY element of storytelling depends on THE

DETAILS. The words and phrases you use to tell your story will
determine whether what youre saying is alluringly seductive or

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painfully boring...

In that respect, it DOES seem that storytelling IS just a string of

magic words or phrases. Yet, we can ONLY say that AFTER
weve come full circle. We must first have a firm grasp on the
nuts-and-bolts OF a story...which explains why this section is
at the end of this book...

...but once you get how a story works, you can focus your
attention on nailing the details to TELL that story...

This IS the fun stuff...and youve earned the right to enjoy that
fun because you understand WHAT makes a story seductive...

...so lets pinpoint exactly HOW to make a story seductive!

This section is going to teach you to add seductive details

through:
1. Specifics
2. Metaphors/Similes
3. Pop Culture Metaphors
4. Emotional Grounding
5. Quirky Phrases
6. Editorializing Asides
7. Twisted Expectations

While its not an official rule, the order in which the seductive
details are listed above is indicative of how often you should

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be using them in your stories. That means you will probably
be relying on SPECIFICS and METAPHORS/SIMILES the most
and TWISTED EXPECTATIONS the least. Hopefully that makes
sense because how many times can a characters expectations
really change over the course of a story? That said, lets get to
the explanations, examples, and plug-in templates!

Specificsadding very specific details to your story accom-

plishes three very important things: 1.) it heightens the emo-
tional impact, 2.) it makes the story more real (strengthening
her feelings of rapport and believability), 3.) and it can some-
times add humor. That said, there is one VERY big drawback
to adding specifics: it can make your story boring! So dont
go overboard and feel like you need to describe EVERYTHING.
Try and pick out a few interesting/funny specifics.

Detail to convey: The first car you wanted to buy

I wanted this Camaro so badan 86 muscle car,
cherry-red with black interior and it had this slight
dent in the hood that looked like a devious smirk,
making it even MORE AWESOME!

Plug-in SPECIFICS Templates...

it was a (describe weather) day when
It was a strangely very warm day in October when
Tom and I decided to take a roadtrip upstate

I remember it cost (exact amount down to the

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cents)
Even though I didnt even like her, I bought her a
drink anyway and that round of drinks cost 14 dol-
lars and 37 cents plus I left a 2 dollar tip, making it 16
dollars and 37 cents I will forever regret spending!

Metaphors/Similescomparing one thing to another is the

fastest and easiest way to jazz up your story details. This works
especially well for quick character descriptions.

The humor of a good metaphor lies in picking something that is

incongruent, yet has a shared quality that makes sense. DONT
simply pair random things together! When youre picking a
metaphor think of the quality youre trying to describe FIRST
and then start thinking of ridiculous things/people/groups/etc.
that (weirdly) share that quality.

If you want to take it a step further, spill some metaphor char-

acteristics onto whatever youre describing (In the example
below, the old lady metaphor is spilled onto the friend char-
acter by adding: making sure he was asleep by 9pm to be
well-rested for a big Saturday of clipping coupons and playing
Bingo.)

Detail to convey: A friend who preferred to stay home

on Friday and Saturday nights.
Once the weekends rolled around, it was like he
joined the old lady club, making sure he was asleep

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by 9pm to be well-rested for a big Saturday of clip-
ping coupons and playing Bingo.

Detail to convey: An ex-girlfriends dog that hated you.

This dog had a hatred of me that Id only heard
about in rap songsmy first run-in with a legitimate
hater!

Plug-in Metaphor Templates...

(Character) was/is a(n) (adjective, e.g. male/female,
old lady/old man) version of (Metaphor, pop culture
references works really well here, e.g., Kanye West/R.
Kelly) because (quality shared)
Tom is like a male version of Taylor Swift because
that dude never shuts up about his exs!

(Character) is/was acting/behaving like a (noun,

e.g.,diva/loudmouth or complex noun e.g., a fat
kid told he couldnt have seconds) (quality shared)
Whenever Tom gets a crush he acts like a 10-year-
old boy who just got his first boner...out of control
and totally desperate!

Pop Culture Metaphorsusing pop culture to convey story

details generates fast and humorous rapport. It often works
best if you pair your pop culture references with an adjective
and/or modifying word.

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Detail to convey: A cool high school teacher
My English teacher in junior year of high school was
like a non-drug addicted Tommy Lee.

Plug-in pop culture Metaphor Tem-

plates...
(person described)...looked kinda like...(pop culture
tie)...if...[delivery note: pause for comic effect](pop
culture tie) gained about 200 pounds.
Tom ended up making out with a girl who looked
kinda like Katy Perry...if Katy Perry gained about
200 pounds.

(person/behavior described)...is like a...(pop culture

tie)without/instead of...(what pop culture tie is
know for)
Tom parked and we jumped out of the car like Bat-
man and Robin, except instead of the Batmobile we
were hopping out of a 97 Honda Accord.

Emotional Groundingbecause our feelings are so abstract

and personal, its hard for someone to really grasp where
youre coming from when you say, I was mad or I was con-
fused. However, if you use a metaphor or simile to clarify an
emotion, suddenly what youre trying to convey is more un-
derstandable

Detail to convey: Being at happy hour with your boss

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I just wanted to go home but my boss ordered an-
other round of shots making me feel like the nerd in
junior high getting peer pressure by the cool kids.

Plug-in emotional GROUNDING Templates...

(Reason for physical pain)...feeling like I got into a
street fight with(funny person/group who could
inflict pain)
After two days of Cross Fit I woke up feeling like
Id gotten into a street fight with a gang of midget
wrestlers.
the sort of...(feeling)...I thought only existed in...
(funny reference, pop culture or high art works well)
Toms crush on Sally was the sort of unrequited
love I thought only existed in Italian love sonnets
or something of that nature.

Quirky phrasespeppering your stories with a few offbeat

adjectives and phrases is a great way to add depth as well as
humor and entertainment to your stories. Start looking out
for good adjectives and phrases to use in your stories.

Once you start looking, youll find an abundance of quirky ad-

jectives and phrases in movies, books, and television shows.
You can dress up your stories with these phrasal gems without
much effort or thought at alljust throw them in when you
want to get a laugh or make something in your story stand-
out (these also work really well when you accent it in your

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delivery, which you will learn about in the Bonus Module on
delivery).

Detail to convey: An elaborate date you planned for a

girl when you were high school.
I envisioned this date as being the most romantic
date in the history of romance!

Plug-in Quirky Phrases Templates...

the magic of (activity being describing)
Tom and I were enjoying the magic of 2-for-1 Happy
Hour drinks.

(Scene youre about to describe)future high

school students will one day study it like they now
study Shakespeare.
What happened to Tom and I that night was so epic
that high school students will one day study it like
they now study Shakespeare.

Editorializing asidesa main reason youre even telling a

woman stories is so she gets a better sense of who you are.
And since a MAJOR component of YOUR character is your likes,
opinions, and views on things, adding tangential asides to
stories where you voice editorial statements enhances a
story by strengthening the sense of rapport as well as adding
humor.

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Detail to convey: Driving up to the McDonalds pick-up
window to grab the McFlurry you just ordered.
...then she handed me my McFlurry... which instant-
ly made my night 27% better because McFlurrys are
the greatest concoction of frozen deliciousness hu-
mankind has ever known!

Plug-in Editorializing asides Templates...

because (thing you like) is so mind-blowingly good
I wish there was a way to stick an IV in my arm and
have...(thing you like described in a funny way)...
intravenously put into my body all the time!
...because Toms pumpkin pie is so mind-blowingly
good I wish there was a way to stick an IV in my arm
and have that pumpkiny goodness intravenously
dripped into my body all the time!

...once I heard...(song/artist you hate)...it was an

omen of the horrors the night had in store because...
(song/artist you hate)...is a...(delivery pause)...son-
ic...(delivery pause)...abortion!
...once the DJ played Drake I knew it was going to be
a night of horrors because Drake doesnt make mu-
sic. Drake makes...sonic...abortions!

Twisted Expectationsa great storytelling trick is to show

how a characters expectations were dead wrong. Often that
twist happens when the character encounters conflict or

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when reality contradicts his expectations. This works especial-
ly well for nostalgic childhood stories because it captures how
innocent and nave we all were at that time.

Detail to convey: Your first school dance in high school

I was so excited because I thought the Winter For-
mal was going to be this formal black-tie gala
(Later in the story, to make it humorous, you should
poke fun at how ridiculous your expectations were,
e.g., Little did I realize the Winter Formal was just a
DJ playing Shaggy songs in a dusty gym to awkward
13-year-olds groping each other on the dance floor!)

Plug-in inflated expectations Templates...

I envisioned/imagined/expected...(an outrageous-
ly exaggerated depiction)
The way Tom described Sally, I imagined her to be
some undiscovered supermodel...

maybe I was just optimistic/misinformed/too trust-

ing, BUT...(description of a job , try to use verbiage
that sounds like a very over-the-top job description)
Maybe I was just optimistic, but I had thought this
internship was going to be a serious workplace
learning opportunity that would equip me with the
skills necessary for a bright future in publishing

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 a pp e ndi x
Pulling it all
t o g e t he R
appe n d ix a : o b j e ct i o n s to o verc o me
a listener will ask herself these questions
which your story has to answer

Primary Questions to Answer

Why are you telling me this? The characters change.
Okay, what does this have to do with me? A flaw/sympa-
thetic character trait makes him relatable/likable to the
listener.
Thats nice, so what? Characters motivation is non-obvi-
ous/interesting.
Okay, why should I care? Antagonist/opponent poses a real
threat.
Okay, what does that mean? The stakes are high, which
means the likable character and/or his goal is in jeopardy.
Okay, why should I keep listening? Conflicts and conse-
quences are suspenseful.
Alright, so what happened in the end? The resolution ex-
plains the outcome of the character and his quest.
...and what does THAT mean? The point of the story was
how the character changed.

Secondary Questions to Answer

Why should I believe any of this? The specific details make
it believable.
Okay, but who exactly is he/she (you character)? Make
your description crystal clear with a character description

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(use: metaphor/similes or a pop culture metaphor).
Okay, but who/whats going to stop him/her and why?
The characters opponent should be unsympathetic,
strong, and determined to get in the way of your charac-
ters desire.
Okay, am I ever going to laugh? Throw an unexpected
twist into your story (use: quirky phrasing/editorializing).
Okay, what did he/she feel like when that important mo-
ment happened? Make sure emotional high/low points
are emphasized in a non-abstract way (use: metaphor/
emotional grounding).
Okay, it that what he/she deserved? If possible, see if kar-
ma and/or irony had anything to do with the resolution of
your story.

Final Questions to Consider

Why does this sound like a story Ive heard a million
times before? Because the motivation is too obvious and/
or the details arent seductive/specific enough.
Why dont I care what he/she does? Your character is not
likable/sympathetic.
So...whats the big deal? The stakes are low/undefined
and/or theres minimal/no jeopardy and/or the opponent
is non-threatening.
Why is the character so boring? He/she is a victim be-
cause he/she is acting too passive.
Why did that seem too easy? The conflicts are weak.

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 Appendix
Cant you just get to the point?! Theres too much detail,
which means theres probably not enough forward move-
ment/action.
How would that ever happen? Why am I skeptical? Con-
sequences dont align with/arent appropriate to the con-
flicts.
Why isnt this fun? Story just isnt relatable/suspenseful,
which is either a problem with the characters and/or the
quest and/or the choice of seductive details.
Why do I feel cheated? The resolution was poor/didnt
align with the conflicts and consequences of the story.
Why did you just tell me this? The change in the charac-
ter either wasnt articulated or didnt seem like enough of
a reason to tell an entire story.

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app e nd ix B : A n n o t a t e d S t o ry example
examining A seductive Story
under the microscope

H
heres a story Ive often told women on dates (and
which Ive alluded to several times in this book). The
[ ] callout the storytelling elements being used. With-
out further introduction, heres a story I like to call...

My Nationality Story, or the Time

My Crazy Grandma Tricked Me Into
Bragging About My Fake Great
Grandfather
The story of my nationality is kind of a funny story [TEASER],
and a bit of a sore subject for me! Because it led to a VERY em-
barrassing day for me when I was in 3rd grade [COOL VULNER-
ABILITY]! So, to properly tell this story, we need to travel back to
the early 90s [SPECIFICS: TIME]Im talking back to when kids
wore snap bracelet and pogs were the coolest [POP CULTURE
REFERENCE]

so I grew up on a VERY white part of Long Island and all my

friends were either Irish or Italian or German...basically a lot of
non-exotic nationalities. That made me kind of hope I was some-
thing elsesomething cool and differentlike Ethiopian or
something like that! [SETS UP LATER IRONY]

95
 Appendix

I asked my parents just about every day what nationality I

was, but always got the same answer. Theyd say, Youre half
Italian, a quarter German, and we dont really know what the
other quarter is because your Grandma was adopted. Even
though I was frustrated, it gave me hope! Maybe I was Ethio-
pian after all...

And since Im always looking for something to brag about

[CHARACTER FLAW], I BEGGED my Grandma for information
about her heritage [CHARACTERS MOTIVATION]. Now, keep
in mind, I was in 3rd grade, so I had no idea my Grandma was
kinda crazy and full of shit! Which created the perfect storm for
future embarrassment for me [STAKES/QUIRKY PHRASE]

And heres why: my grandma may have been crazy, but she
was also very cunningor at least cunning enough to fool
the 3rd grade version of myself [MAKING OPPONENT MEN-
ACING]. So to get me to trust her crazy lies, she started small.
She began by telling me that my great, great, great uncle was
William Seward. If you dont know who that is, Im going to
drop a 1000-dollar Jeopardy answer on you [POP CULTURE
REFERENCE]: William Seward was the American senator who
purchased Alaska...

Once I learned this, you know I just had to tell everyone. So

I was out on the playground, broadcasting this Judge-family
fun fact [QUIRKY PHRASE] to anyone who would listen. And

96
 Appendix
get thisa few weeks after EVERYONE in my 3rd grade class
knew of my relation to Senator Seward, as luck would have it,
we learned about him in Social Studies! This made me a gram-
mar school A-list celebrity, and, as you can probably imagine,
I LOVED the attention [COOL VULNERABILITY/EDITORIALIZ-
ING ASIDE]

But now I was like a crack addict who needed another fix
[EMOTIONAL GROUNDING]I wanted to know more [RAIS-
ING THE STAKES/INTENSIFYING CHARACTER MOTIVATION]
so I spent most of my Christmas vacation [SPECIFICS: SEA-
SON] peppering my grandma with questions about who ELSE
we were related to eventually she revealed to me that I was
ALSO related to the inventor of the traffic light! Not only was
I related to him, but she told me THAT WAS HER GRANDFA-
THER! LikeI meanyoure in 3rd grade and you hear that
your GREAT GRANDFATHER INVENTED THE TRAFFIC LIGHT
andholy shitthis is like ground-breaking information! [ED-
ITORIALIZING ASIDE]

I was actually EXCITED for Christmas vacation to end so I could

get back to school and BRAG MY LITTLE 3rd GRADE FACE OFF
[QUIRKY PHRASE] about this! Within days, everyone knew that
my GREAT GRANDFATHER invented the motherfucking traffic
light! And everything was going perfect for a few weeks until
February rolled around [SPECIFICS: MONTH]

As you probably know, February is Black History Month. What

97
 Appendix
you probably dont know is that the inventor of the traffic light
was black. [CONFLICT] So, I remember exactly where I was
when I learned this inconvenient factoid... I was at my desk,
probably fiddling with a snap bracelet, as our teacher pinned
up posters about famous black people [SPECIFICS].

And guess whos the first poster she pins up. Here, Ill save you
the suspense...spoiler alart...[DELIVERY: Pause for dramatic
effect] the guy who invented the traffic light. My supposed
great grandfather. Black guy. Everyone in class turned around
and looked right at me. And I was sitting at my deskfreak-
ing the fuck out [CONSEQUENCE]people were asking me,
Arent you related to that guy? Isnt that your great grand-
father?and Im like Ehhh...Yeah? I think so, maybe
[RESOLUTION: Characters quest for bragging rights failed]
And the whole time I felt like Jim Carry in the Truman Show
[METAPHOR/POP CULTURE REFERENCE]like my whole life
was a big lie! [EMOTIONAL GROUNDING]

And that was the moment I learned that Im either a quarter

blackmaybe Ethiopian after all! [IRONY]or that my grand-
ma is out of her fucking mind! [CHANGE: Gained knowledge of
nationality or knowledge that grandma is crazy]

98
appendix C: Frequently Asked Questions
typical concerns
about storytelling
What if I cant think of any good stories from life?

That question is the most common objection I hear when tell-

ing guys they need to develop storytelling skills. Unfortunately,
it really doesnt have that much to do with storytelling. Perhaps
youre just not thinking long or hard enough about the anecdotes
and story-worthy experiences from your life

but more likely, guys ask this question for two main reasons:
1.) theyre walking through life in a daze, oblivious to the people,
events, and experiences that might make for great stories, or 2.)
theyre leading a boring life.

If you REALLY cannot think of ANY material to use in this course,

something needs to change RIGHT NOW. You should leave your
house immediately and do something outside your comfort
zone or something youve always wanted to do or even just
do something unexpected or generous.

Point is this: if youre actually asking this question, you probably

dont need help with storytelling. You need help with how youre
living your life.

I have stories that I like to tell, but they dont really in-
volve change or even a lot of the storytelling elements

99
 Appendix
mentioned in this book. What gives?

This is a question Ive often asked myself. There are certain

stories I tell women that are just descriptions of something
that happened to me or to a friend or even something I read in
the newsbut theres no change, sometimes not even much
of a conflict. Yet, women HAVE enjoyed these stories

I answered my own question when I realized what women

enjoyed about these narratives were: 1.) my delivery, 2.) the
way I phrased/described aspects of the story, 3.) my passion/
enthusiasm when telling the story, and 4.) the relevance the
story had to the vibe and/or the womans interest level in what
I was talking about.

For example, one of these no change narratives I told a

woman just the other day described a series of articles my
hometown newspaper ran back when I was in college. The se-
ries reported on the case of a bulldog named Duke who was
sitting on doggy death row because some guy alleged Duke
had attacked him.

I found the articles to be very humorous because the descrip-

tions of Duke were over-the-top, making him sound as if he
were a mob boss who was confident hed walk, as if he knew
he was Teflon. (Every article included pictures of Duke, usually
of Duke sitting in front of the judge in court!)

100
 Appendix
Even though I didnt learn anything about myself, nor did
I have one of my values challenged, the girl I told my Duke
story to thought it was hilarious and commented on how
much she enjoyed listening to the story. Yet all I did was re-
port back on a story Id read years ago in the newspaper

or WAS that all I did?

Even from the short description of the Duke story above, no-
tice the seductive details used:
Metaphors/similes (comparing Duke to a mob boss)
Emotional grounding (Duke seemed as if he were Tef-
lon)
Editorializing asides (my own feelings on Dukeobvi-
ously I was on his side)
Specifics (describing the pictures of Duke in front of the
judge)
Quirky phrases (doggy death row)

Even though I didnt launch into a 3-element character story, I

STILL relied HEAVILY on the storytellers toolbox to convey
my Duke story.

Also, there is one caveat to mention when telling stories like

this: these stories are primarily intended to ENTERTAIN wom-
en. Telling stories without the emotional catharsis of a tra-
ditional 3-element story is fine, but it wont bond a woman to
you nor will it really make her feel anything but entertained.

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 Appendix

Thats why I prefer to use my traditional 3-element stories ear-

ly on (first dates, etc.) and use entertainment-only stories
for girls Im already seeing or dating. That said, theres noth-
ing wrong with giving anyone a little entertainmentjust be
sure to also include some emotion eliciting stories to ensure
your storytelling also generates some rapport with her.

(And in case youre curious, the judge found Duke innocent

and cleared him of all the charges.)

How do I improvise stories?

Honestly, the hard way is the easy way: BY PRACTICE. Its com-
pletely possible to improvise stories and, ideally, thats a goal I
hope every guy on this course has. However, you have to walk
before you can run.

That means get comfortable with the storytelling elements

first. Practice them as much as you can. Obviously practice sto-
rytelling with women, but you really can be practicing through-
out your day. Practice on your friends, on your family, on your
coworkers, anyone! Bottom line: people like hearing stories
and now you know how to tell them!

The more you tell stories, the more comfortable youll get at
orating/delivery as well as understanding how to put stories
together. As with anything, as you get better, it becomes eas-

102
 Appendix
ier. So what once might have seemed impossible (thinking of
a story on the fly) will become VERY possible with practice.

Is it okay to exaggerate a story a bit?

Yes. Especially if it makes for a more entertaining or emotion-

ally honest story. Just dont lie. Telling fake stories will get
cause women not to trust you, but telling exaggerated stories
will usually get women to pay closer attention to what youre
saying (if you do it right).

I feel like Im boring women with my storieshow

can I feel like Im NOT boring?

Look. If you FEEL like youre boring, you probably are. Wan-
na know why? Because delivery is a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Even when I tell women crappy stories (and I do sometimes),
it STILL usually gets a decent reaction because I always THINK
what Im saying is interesting.

If you DONT think your stories are interesting then guess what:
THEYRE NOT! Hopefully after reading through this book, and
especially after going through the video modules, you will at
least have A LITTLE confidence in your storytelling ability.

But if you dont believe in yourself and your stories, no one

will. Youre your first audience. You have to impress yourself

103
 Appendix
before you can impress anyone else.

My friends think this story I tell about when my bud-

dy from college shit his pants is hilarious, but when
I tell that story to women, it doesnt get the same
response. Whats up with that?

I feel like it should go without saying, but there will be stories

that can get your friends laughing their asses off...but those
arent always the best stories to tell women youre attracted
to. Men and women have a different sense of humor as well
as different tolerances for profanity/inappropriateness.

With a woman you dont know very well, keep your stories
PG-13 (at least until you get to know her better) and avoid con-
troversial topics like religion, politics, etc. Remember: all that
matters is the vibe. If you tell stories that are going to offend/
upset/disgust her, what do you think that is going to do to the
vibe? Exactly.

Im just not good at storytelling! Why?

No, youre just not practicing enough. Storytelling is NOT compli-

cated. We gave you EVERYTHING (plus more) you need to know
about storytelling PLUS an idea generator! If you STILL cant tell a
good story, you simply need to make more of an effort and prac-
tice your stories some more. (Stick with it! Its worth it.)

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