Neurotics

anonymous
Help for the worried and lonely sounds an impossibly large-scale
task but in a room in London's busy West End a start has been made.
Marie Spinks describes the work of the group and the way in which
it helped her.

Neurotics Anonymous is an organization which has
been called a social approach to a social question. A
lively, mixed group, it meets in London three times
a week. Its first aim is to combat the social problem
of loneliness?the kind that leads to mental illness.
The second is to help people, with personal difficulties,
many of whom are emotionally disturbed. The group
is non-medical, and does not claim to cure anyone
of anything. There are doctor members but they
attend in a lay capacity.
Those who join represent a wide selection of the
population. A striking feature about many members
is their high intelligence. Educated Asians or con-
tinentals have found their intelligence has often set
them apart in England. They have been obliged to
take work below their professional training. They
find acceptance slow where they live and at work.
Other members are divorced, widowed or single and
living alone. And there are young people, some from
broken homes, who have never learned to make
loving, stable relationships.
The growth of Neurotics Anonymous came as a
result of a personal tragedy. About four years ago the
founder and chairman, Mr. Jack Yates, lost his sight
after an accident. From living an active life and
travelling the world he found himself dependent on
others, isolated in a waste-land, eternally dark and
frightening. Instead of accepting life as a cabbage,
he fought back and started to think of other isolated
people, chiefly those cut off from a full life by an
inability to communicate. He planned a group where
people could befriend each other and be given con-
structive help with troubles of all kinds but mainly
nervous problems. He approached a friend, Mr Phillip
sick. Members join after seeing advertisements in the
press, or are introduced by another member. The
work of the group is becoming better known, and has
featured on radio and television. Doctors, social
workers and hospital welfare departments are also
referring patients whom they know will break down
again if they 'go it alone'.
As a registered charity, costs are kept to a minimum,
enough to clear such expenses as hiring rooms for
meetings and publicity. Much of the clerical work is
done voluntarily by members. The initial joining fee
is ?2.2.0. Afterwards one pays a small sum, roughly
about 2/6d at every attendance. This is put towards
the high charge of renting premises in London for
the evening.
I joined the group after a nervous breakdown,
brought on by financial difficulties and chronic illness 1
in my family. Alone all day in a strange district with
a young child, I had the usual advice: 'You
ought to
go out more, meet people and make friends.' The
Jack Yates in the chair during a Neurotics Anonymous
meeting. Photo: John Brooke
Brooke

Fox, who became co-founder, together with a psycho-

logist, a scientist and a Christian philosopher. A room
was hired, Neurotics Anonymous advertised for mem-

bers, and the first tentative meetings were held.

Not officially sick
Group therapy is not a new idea. Hospitals have had
such groups for years. But in these groups each person
is already ill enough to have been sent there by a
doctor. Mr. Yates' group is for those not officially
24
Neurotics Anonymous
advisers, including my doctor, were vague as to how
this could be done. Attending a church and joining a
social club were suggested.
I knew, from past experience, that although one
could make friends at these places it was a slow
process. I needed people at once; wanted to hear
myself called by my christian name again. I saw
Neurotics Anonymous advertised in my Sunday paper,
and made a tentative application, wondering if it
Would be a kind of stamping ground for the un-
pleasantly eccentric. I received a kindly, sane reply
from Mr. Yates, giving me times and places of
meetings.
New and positive
The first meeting I attended was in a room
Oxford Street. The initial effort of going into
full of strangers and making myself known
Yates was difficult, but it was the first new and posi-
tive thing I had done for weeks. His quiet, warm wel-
come was reassuring, and I was introduced to the
group by my christian name only. All are truly anony-
mous, surnames are never used or divulged, except by
members themselves, should they wish.
The meetings follow a certain pattern. The first half
is a general debate. Subjects are suggested by mem-
bers, and the most acceptable is judged by a show of
hands. Everything is talked about, from violence on
T.V. to Japanese art. Nothing is taboo, but members
are asked to observe a reasonable decorum,
bering the group is non-sectarian and non-political.
All beliefs are respected. The standard of debating
is usually vigorous and good-humoured, even when
somebody shows exasperation by saying 'So and so is
talking tripe'. 'So and so' nearly always comes up with
a
pithy reply.
Mr. Yates is a skilled chairman, making the frus-
trated and more inarticulate feel they belong. Natur-
ally, subjects like worry and loneliness are
discussed. When there is no debate a talk is given,
either by a medically qualified speaker, or a member
talking on a topic of general interest. After a refresh-
ment break, the more serious part of the meeting
starts. During the break, those with personal problems
talk to Mr. Yates. Afterwards these problems are
discussed in open forum, anonymously, being referred
to as 'a member's problem'. Often, people don't wish
to remain anonymous, because it is much more bene-
ficial if they themselves can take part in the forum
and answer questions.
Nagging doubt
The problems many. Sexual difficulties and ignor-
are
ance are common. Despite modern frankness, a lot of
People still brood under a load of guilt and doubt.
One hears single women, happy in their careers and
lives, but with a nagging doubt that they are abnormal
because they have no wish to emulate the amorous
behaviour of some of their colleagues. Others, especi-
ally the younger men, regard themselves as sinners,
perhaps perverted and unfit for marriage. With sym-
pathetic sharing of these burdens, many see that they
are neither abnormal, nor great sinners. Sometimes
they are made to laugh at themselves, but never are
they laughed at by others.
Work problems are frequent. There is the girl who
has been coerced into teaching because her parents
are teachers. Hating it, she fears to
say so at home
because of the sacrifices made to give her a good
education. We hear the son of ambitious parents who
expect him to follow a profession when he is a prac-
tical type who would be happier learning a trade.
The atmosphere of this open forum is warm, under-
standing and encouraging. People who have kept
things bottled up for years begin to talk freely. This
just off alone relieves nervous tension. The most valuable
a room
help is given by people who have had similar troubles
to Mr. and talk about how they either solved the problem or
learned to live with it. There is not always a solution,
but at least the sufferer has had several ways sign-
posted which he never knew existed. People who are
highly nervous, and say they are depressed and lack
energy, are advised to consult their own doctors.
Nurse's training
One doesn't walk into a meeting as a nervous wreck
and come out a radiant human being. The build-up
is much slower. One has to attend meetings regularly,
especially during times of personal crisis. This was
remem- shown in the case of Jane. Only daughter of a posses-
sive mother, she caused resentment by changing her
job and her address. 'I just had to get away. Mother
was throttling me with kindness,' she told us. She had
not felt fulfilled as a secretary and wanted to train
for nursing. When she gave up her 'good safe job' for
the hard work of hospital there was strong opposition.
It was during the difficult adjustment period that Jane
needed the support of the group. It was somewhere to
often go when she wanted to drop her professional calm
and let her worries come flooding out. That was nearly
a year ago and we don't see much of her now. She
has passed her first exam and is engaged to a labora-
tory technician. We often lose our successes, but
others stay, and their work in the group is invaluable.
I have benefited enormously from my membership,
making friends and sharing many interests. The group
hope to have permanent premises soon. A place where
one can go any time there is need, not only on
specific
evenings. We now have nearly 1,000 members and
want to encourage more young people of the 'bedsitter
tribe' to join. With this in view, many social activities
are being planned. I am asked 'Wouldn't an ordinary
social club meet the need?' Members of Neurotic
Anonymous think not. At the usual social club you're
a bore, and rather odd if you mention emotional
problems. But with our group you're thought a little
odd if you don't have any!
For those wanting further information, Mr. Yates'
address is, 24 Carlton Hill, St. John's Wood, N.W.8.
Enclose s.a.e. please.
25