Mao 1

Tianyun Mao

Professor Marie Webb

Linguistics 12 5PM

3 May 2019

An American Welcome

Be grateful to the one who first guides you to a new culture.

– Tianyun Mao

Thanks to him, I changed my personality in a good way. It was a boring school party

where we first met.

“Hey! I’m Tyler.” A strange voice rose.

A guy with dirty blond hair and hazel eyes came towards my friends and I. I glimpsed at

him. He looked shy and a little nerdy. “Hey! What’s up?” None of us knew him, but we

responded to him politely. Just like how we met others, we started a tedious but common

conversation with Tyler. We exchanged our names and talked about how much the party sucked.

However, as normal, I spent most of my time standing aside and listening to them. I was shy

when I met foreign people because of my horrible speaking skills though I was talkative when I

was with my friends. I did not speak a lot in English before I came to America, so I was afraid to

let others hear how weird my accent was and learn how lacking my listening skills and

vocabulary were. At that time, I didn’t think we would be in touch in the future.

Tyler and my friends started to hang out together, so he eventually became my friend.

However, I was still pretty quiet around him. I wanted to talk, but I did not. I laughed with them

but I secretly talked to myself in my head all the time. I still had a strong psychological

precaution toward him. He was still strange in my mind, so I didn’t feel confident talking to him.
 Mao 2

One day, things started to change. Tyler, a friend, and I planned to go to the beach

together, but one of our friends told us that she couldn’t go, so Tyler and I went to the beach

alone. It took us about half an hour to walk from our dorms to Goleta beach. Tyler was proactive

and talkative. Since it would be more awkward if I didn’t respond, I tried to talk more.

Gradually, I found that we actually had a lot to talk about, from school to sports to games. I

didn’t even realize that my nervous feelings towards him were dwindling as I talked to him

more. Obviously, he also felt my difference, so he asked, “Why didn’t you talk so much before. I

felt like you were about to say something every time, but you didn’t.”

“How did you know I actually wanted to talk oh my god?” I was shocked.

“From your eyes, you just looked like you wanted to express something.” He looked at

me sincerely.

“Well, you were right.” I sighed.

Then I started to tell him the reason behind why I was afraid to speak in English. This

was due to some cultural differences. I told him when I was in China, if I answered something

wrong in front of others, I might be laughed at or judged. As a result, I did not want to talk too

much so that I could avoid many stupid mistakes and not be so stressed.

He laughed and said, “Oh man! No one will laugh at you here. Everybody makes

mistakes sometimes so everybody will understand you. You can practice by speaking with me.

Don’t worry, I won’t make fun of you. Hopefully, you will be able to overcome your fear. You

have my word.” He looked at me, smiling, which warmed my heart. I felt like I gained a lot of

confidence at that moment, and I could trust him. “To be honest,” he continued, “I think you are

a pretty funny person. Although you didn’t talk much, I felt it from the few conversations we’ve
 Mao 3

had.” Before he told me this, I was always worried that sometimes Americans could not get my

point, but now I knew.

Since then, he began helping me correct my grammatical mistakes and pronunciation all

the time and reminded me not to worry about making mistakes. I had a huge problem with

distinguishing the pronunciations of “er” and “el.” When I mispronounced a word, he would say

“I don’t know what you are talking about” on purpose, which made me a little mad. However,

soon I realized he was joking, so I gradually became okay with his jokes. Sometimes, he

intentionally messed up the pronunciation of several words to confuse me, but after that, he

would patiently repeat each word several times until he was sure that I could pronounce them

correctly. It turned out to be a really fun process of learning which I enjoyed a lot. Thanks to his

patient teaching, I became more confident about talking to other people.

Once, I had a presentation for my class. It was the first presentation I had to do in

English, so I really panicked about it. Fortunately, he was there to help me. Three days before

my presentation, he volunteered to be my audience. Every night, we went to a study room and

rehearsed my presentation. “Before you start, I need to give you a crucial tip for presentation,”

he said. “What is it?” I questioned. “Remember to be confident. Once you are confident enough,

you will be able to conquer your audience.” “Hmmm, okay I will try,” I responded quietly. After

my response, he shook his head, “Man, you should be louder. Don’t use this kind of volume

during your presentation. Promise me.” I nodded my head and said “Yes.” He taught me how

Americans speak and how they show confidence when they speak. Then, he asked me to mimic

their behaviors. It took me so long to learn, but I got it eventually.

The night before my presentation, “I think you are good enough now,” he told me.

I doubtfully said, “Really? Don’t sugarcoat it, man.”

 Mao 4

“Honestly. Just don’t panic tomorrow okay?”

I nodded my head.

Before the presentation, I told myself “be confident,” and I convinced myself that no one

would judge me or laugh at me, so it was okay to make a mistake. During my presentation,

everything went well except for one pronunciation mistake. I explained my subject clearly to my

classmates and my professor. As a result, I got a pretty good grade, which made me extremely

happy because I had never done such an amazing presentation before. Right after I got out of the

class, I got Tyler’s message: “How was your presentation?” “SUPER BOMB!!!” I replied

immediately. “Good! I told you that you would crush it. I’m seriously so proud of you :)” he

said.

I was so quiet because my culture told me that quietness is better than rowdiness. My

parents valued my studies way more than my socialization. In their view, the combination of

excellent academic performance and quietness was way more important than being outgoing.

Therefore, I lacked the critical skill which is the key to a successful life in America. It would

have been so hard for me to get used to a new culture if I hadn’t met Tyler. His words were

magical, encouraging me all the time. He was so supportive, guiding me to a fearless American

world. He taught me how to communicate with Americans and how to express myself properly

his culture. When I was in China, I seldom asked teachers questions because they might think

either the questions were stupid or I didn’t pay attention to the class which was not true.

However, now I go to office hours more often because I am not worried about having

conversations with my American professors and teaching assistants. I know my questions will

never be regarded as stupid and my teachers will understand what I am trying to say.
 Mao 5

Undeniably, Tyler helped me a lot. Maybe his assistance did not directly help my

academics, but I know it must have contributed to my academic performance somehow. I’m so

glad he talked to me at the party at first and has accompanied me all the time. I wish one day I

will be able to give him an unforgettable Chinses welcome when he comes to my hometown in

return.