1

(CLEARS THROAT)

Webster's defines "class"

as "a group of students

gathered at a pre-ordained time

for the purposes of education."

Angela pretty much epitomized class.

Who could turn the world on

with her smile? Angela.

Who could take a nothing day

and suddenly make it all

seem worthwhile? Angela.

So no one told you life

was gonna be this way.

Angela.

Sometimes you want to go

where everybody knows your name.

Angela.

(SINGING SANFORD AND SON THEME SONG)

Angela.

I'm sorry. Death is hard for me.

But at least Angela died

doing what she loved:

swimming less than 20 minutes

after she had eaten.

That's a real thing, kids.

Listen to your mothers.

That was Angela. Fearless. Spontaneous.

Honest, about herself

just as much as she was

about the world around her.

She had grace, courage,

and an unmatched zest for life.

She may be gone,

but her voice will live on

in DVD and Hulu Plus

and tiny droid-projected messages.

I may have lost a boss,

but heaven has gained a princess.

And I am at the wrong funeral.

It seems today that all you see

Is violence in movies and sex on TV

But where are those

good old-fashioned values

On which we used to rely?

Lucky there's a family guy

Lucky there's a man who

positively can do

All the things that make us

Laugh and cry

He's a Fam ily Guy!

(QUIET CHATTER)

Any idea what this meeting is about?

(UNINTELLIGIBLE BABBLING)

Oh, we're getting a new boss?

Oh, I hope it's Hugo Boss.

Then we'll all look snazzy.

ANNOUNCER:

Tonight's episode of Family Guy

is brought to you by Hugo Boss.

Look for us in the

low-trafficked corner of Macy's

between Eddie Bauer and

the never-bought male jewelry.

Attention, everyone!

Do not adjust your TV sets.

We are an interracial couple.

I'd like to introduce myself.

My name is Bert and this

is my lovely wife Sheila.

Two sets of disappointed parents

right there.

- Well, only her parents.

- Aah!

Now that Angela's no longer with us,

we will be your new bosses.

We're splitting the job

because one of the shareholders'

favorite songs was "Ebony and Ivory,"

so here we are. (CHUCKLES)

SHEILA: Now we know

it's difficult to remember

two new names, so to make things easier,

- you can call us "Beila."

- BERT: Or "Shert."

(BERT AND SHEILA LAUGH)

Boy, I bet you

she's a handful in the bedroom.

Two handfuls, baby.

Damn it, I went all the way

around the room!

Now, some of you may find the idea

of two bosses unconventional, but

(ALTERNATING WORDS): we assure

you nothing will be different.

And our door will always be open

to you any time of day.

And there is no issue

too big or too small.

Nice to meet all of you.

So, as our mascot Pawtucket Pat says,

"All ye Federalists, imbibe!"

It means, "Everybody, drink."

ALL: Yay!

Two bosses? This sucks.

Well, at least it beats

being home with my wife.

LOIS: Peter!

Aah! When did we cut back home?

- Hey, Peter.

- All right, Sheila,

let's do it right here

on the desk while Bert watches.

No, Peter, that's not what this is.

Sorry, I-I thought

I was picking up on a vibe.

So, Peter, we've been tasked

with making the operations

around here run more efficiently,

and part of that will involve

reassigning people

based on their abilities.

We want you to be

the office recyclables guy.

So we're gonna put a flag on you,

and wherever you go, people will know

that's where they put their recyclables.

Please don't just throw them over.

Well, at least make sure all

the liquids are gone, please,

before you throw them.

Smithers, who is that young go-getter?

That's a character

from another show, sir.

- Simpson, you say?

- Pretty much, sir. mu

TV ANNOUNCER:

We now return to Titanic 2,

narrated by Al Gore.

Iceberg, right ahead!

AL GORE: But due to man's

excessive use of fossil fuels,

climate change had rendered the iceberg

nothing more than a small cube.

Peter, why are you wearing a flag?

Eh, it's part of my job now

'cause of my new bosses.

Uh, is it a promotion?

Because it doesn't

look like a promotion.

No, it looks like an old lady's Rascal.

- Aah!

- So, who are these new bosses?

Their names are Bert and Sheila.

My job sucks now.

It's worse than when

I was a dinosaur walker.

- (WHISTLES) Hey!

- What?

- Pick that up!

- Pick what up?

- That!

- That? That was there.

No, you were looking at your phone.

- No, I wasn't.

- Yes, you were.

Sir, this is a neighborhood

where we respect the rules of society.

Ooh! Society now.

Sir Thomas More up here.

Good for you and your neighborhood.

I'm gonna take a picture of you

and post it on Facebook.

Oh, great!

I hope it gets a lot of likes.

You know what? I forgot my bag.

- Ooh, you forgot your bag?

- Yeah, I forgot my bag.

But I'll be sure to come back

- and pick this up.

- Oh, yes, I'm sure you'll be back.

Look, I'm only here to create

an amusing comparison

- to my current job

- Well, bully for you.

Which I am, at this moment,

describing to my family

in my living room.

So, technically, you don't even exist.

Well, how do you know I wasn't

telling my wife a story

and you're a figment of my imagination?

I-I can assure you that is not the case.

ANNOUNCER: We'll be right back

with more Greg in the Window.

PETER: Well, I'll be.

CHOIR: Window!

ANNOUNCER: Greg in the Window,

brought to you by

never-bought male jewelry.

Okay, Peter, we've got

something else for you.

We need you to taste test our

new varieties of seasonal beers,

which will be coming down

this conveyor belt.

Place those on this tray.

All right, that seems easy enough.

Also, our delivery truck drivers

have to pass an annual drug test,

so we'll need you to collect

their urine samples.

They'll be coming down

this same conveyor belt

in similarly colored cups,

which you will need to place

on this tray.

Well, that doesn't seem like a

AUTOMATED VOICE: Belt activated.

- (BUZZER SOUNDS)

- Uh, showtime.

(SNIFFS)

Pumpkin, not bad.

- (SNIFFS) Ugh, trucker pee.

- (BUZZER SOUNDS)
AUTOMATED VOICE: Belt speed increasing.

Oh, boy.