Namtip 1101

Accept the Imperfection

It had been two days since Andrea had wakened up seeing this white clean ceiling

with a rectangular light. There was nothing for her to do because there were only some

books to read, and a television to watch. That was why she wanted to get back to school

as soon as possible. She missed her friends and she is also worried about her soccer

team. They would be having a match with The Woodlands, one of the top ten best female

high school soccer team. If the team doesn’t have their captain, they might not be able to

win.

She closed her eyes once again to clear the worries and think about her life during

the past months. I’m hopeless, she thought to herself and sighed heavily.

Slowly, Andrea leaned both her arms on the bed and push herself up to a sitting

position. She rubbed her eyes and blinked several times to chase the sleepiness that was

pulling her back to bed away.

Suddenly, she heard small footsteps coming from the outside toward the room she

was in. The door was opened and a short chubby woman with a dark skin came in. She

was wearing a plain simple light turquoise shirt and pants with a stethoscope on her neck.

A big smile was sent to Andrea by the little nurse who just made her entrance.

“How are you feeling, Andrea?” asked the nurse.

“I’m...” Andrea spoke and then stopped as she noticed that there was some feeling

coming in her mind. It made her went blank for a few seconds. I’m not okay, Harriet. I’m

not okay. I haven’t been sleeping properly. I couldn’t even eat dinner yesterday. I feel like

dying. These thoughts came to her mind after the question was asked. But, she couldn’t

say what she wanted because Andrea knew that if she did, her nurse is surely going to
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be worried about her. That was why she chose to answer a simple sentence. “I’m fine,

Harriet,” she slowly whispered back.

“Hm?” Harriet did not hear what Andrea said.

“I’m fine,” Andrea spoke a little louder just for Harriet to hear.

“Are you sure, darling?” Harriet said while lowering her head to see Andrea’s face

if she was really fine like what was said. No, I’m not fine. Once again, she could not say

what she wanted. “I know that you are not feeling so well, but cheer up. You will get better

soon,” she continued. “You’re not like Andrea I used to know, you know that right, dear?”

Yes, she was not the same Andrea as she used to be. She knew that better than

anyone. Sighed Andrea once again. “Hope I’ll get better soon,” she smiled softly with sad

eyes looking down at her bed sheet. I hope I could.

“You will, darling. You will,” Harriet softly patted on her pitiful patient. “Oh, I almost

forget to tell you something.” She suddenly lifted the mood up with her loud voice filled

with enthusiasm. “Your friends will come by and visit you today. They made an

appointment at about 10:00 am.,” said Harriet thinking that the visit of Andrea’s friends

might help Andrea be happier.

Andrea nodded a couple of times like she did not hear anything, but when she

realized the content of what her nurse was talking, her eyes opened widely as she heard

what Harriet just said. "What?" said Andrea without knowing that her voice was so soft

that Harriet almost couldn’t hear her. Her face started to turn white and pale.

Andrea’s head started going blank. What should I do? she thought while clenching the

bed sheet even tighter. What if they know about that? I’m gonna be left alone if they know.

They are gonna hate me. I can't tell them. She was drowned by her thought, and suddenly,
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the door sound of Harriet leaving woke her up from her anxiety. She sighed heavily hoping

that her anxiety and disturbance can just disappear like the air that came out of her mouth.

Although she knew worrying does not help anything to get better, she still couldn't get

over it.

Andrea was always that one person that did everything: afterschool activities,

music, sports and students council. She had always been questioned why she was so

perfect at everything. That was why her fear of being imperfect was her biggest concern.

Knowing that her teammates would come and might find out that she had this mental

illness gave her strong anxiety. Or should I just lie that I hurt my back, she thought to

herself while laying down on the bed. She slowly huddled herself and moved her arms

around her body as if she was hugging herself. I should just die she thought.

“Hey, Ace! How are you doing?” a girl with a long blonde hair banded as a ponytail

said with a loud voice.

Andrea was drowned in her thought that she did not even hear the sound of the

door opening, so the voice that pulled her from her thought was from her teammates who

just entered the room. She suddenly sat up because of her fright. Her mouth opened a

little with frighten building up in her mind. What do I do? What do I do? What do I do? the

thoughts kept replaying in her mind.

“We forget that we made an appointment, so we came early to see you before we

go to the match,” another girl with a big sports bag held in her right hand said. Now,

Andrea just noticed that the whole team came to pay their visit to her. “The nurse told us

to come in, though” She turned to another girl at the back, and she nodded back.
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“Oh…Okay,” Andrea paused for a second not knowing what to respond to her

teammates then answered with a short word.

“Are you okay?” asked the blonde girl again. “You look a bit...sad?”

“Yeah, Belle. I guess I’m fine,” she laughed softly trying to hide her thoughts inside

her head and not showing them through her face. What should I say? What if they ask

about the illness.

“So...” Belle started the conversation again looking at Andrea while trying to figure

out what she should say. “You hadn’t gone to school for like a week now”

“We had big practices last week,” another short girl said. “I was hoping you would

come. Hope you’ll get well soon.”

I hope I’ll get better soon, too, thought Andrea. You guys wouldn’t like it if I’m like

this.

“Nah, Ace will be fine without practice,” Belle laughed at her teammate’s concern.

“Ace is still Ace, you know?”

That sentence brought Andrea back to reality. Ace is still Ace. Yes, I’m still me.

She opened her eyes wide noticing that the feelings before faded away a little. Yes, that’s

right. No matter what illness I have, I’m still me, Andrea. Her mouth slowly moved up to

make a small smile, and her eyes started to glow.

You are always you, Ace. Commented [1]: My big issue with this version is that
you are just telling us about her being in a hospital bed.
Nothing happens. We don't see her depression. We're
“Hey, I have something to tell you guys,” Andrea pushed herself up and ssat just told that she "had" it. Her thoughts are good, but
that is more anxiety than depression.
straight on the bed. “I have depression.” The whole story is her sitting in bed and having a
conversation w/ a nurse. The reader is supposed to
believe she suffered from depression just b/c she says
it? Why don't we get to see it?

Also, depression isn't something you just get over like a

cold. Did you do research on depression?
Commented [2]: Thank you