Professional Documents
Culture Documents
By
Ronan Nissenbaum
SHOOTING SCRIPT
+353872467055
ronannissenbaum@gmail.com
OPENING TITLES
White titles on black backround inter-cut with an
extreme-close-up on Walker wearing aviator glasses and a
motorcycle helmet without a visor. As we pan outward, we see
that he is riding some sort of vehicle, perhaps he is riding
a motorcycle? As we continue to pan out we see that he is,
in fact, riding a static bicycle. The title "MONSTER SQUAD"
appears over the shot with a "II" following shortly
afterwards. The editing of this scene is edited to the
rhythm of the song ’Take On Me’ by a-ha. The scene continues
with McCoy brushing his teeth in the bathroom mirror wearing
a towel which covers his full body. He is interrupted by a
text message alert. A close-up of his phone reveals the
text; "OPERATION MELON IS A GO.". McCoy rushes out of the
bathroom and out of his house, he removes his towel in the
process revealing that he has been wearing the Monster Squad
uniform beneath. McCoy jogs out the door but the shot holds
for a moment before McCoy runs back in, grabs a melon from
the kitchen counter, and then runs back out. We then cut to
a close-up of gloved hands holding a cup of tea. The shot
pans upwards to reveal it is the new professor, Akbar,
holding the cup. He receives a text message and as he looks
at it, an overly exaggerated shocked face appears. He then
returns to calm manner as he slowly sets the cup onto a
coffee table before sprinting out of the room in a
ridiculous fashion. The scene then cuts to Rogers running
and drenched in sweat. He and the rest of the crew
miraculously arrive at the door of a building at the same
time but each of them are too focused to even acknowledge
each other or even slow down. They all run into the door one
after another. The door then closes after them and the shot
cuts to the squad silently eating slices of watermelon,
scattered around an open room. McCoy is facing the wrong
way. The silence lasts for a few seconds.
ROGERS
Oh yeah! We have a case.
The gang then look up and straight but not looking at each
other.
EXT.ROAD.NIGHT
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 2.
WOMAN
No! Come back!
A goulish hand smacks the inside of the window, next to the
woman.
INT.GARTH’S HOUSE.NIGHT
A man is watching the television in his living room, laying
back into the couch with his feet up on the coffee table. He
is watching a sitcom as we can hear the laugh-track. He is
watching in complete silence before suddenly bursting out
with a very loud but very brief "Ha!". The man resumes his
silence when suddenly the doorbell rings. The man begins to
ridiculously flail about on the couch before calmly standing
up and walking to the door. The camera follows him. As the
door is opening, the shot quickly cuts to an
over-the-shoulder shot of the crew, all standing in various
silly positions and then quickly cuts back to the previous
shot, as if to be an editing mistake.
MCCOY
Are you the Garth Muel Kelly who
called "about" a pest problem?
McCoy gestures the inverted commas. Akbar then whispers into
McCoy’s ear.
MCCOY
Are you the Garth Muel Kelly who
called about "a" pest problem.
Akbar then looks at the camera and nods his head with a
grin, thinking he is correct.
GARTH
How many other Garth Muel Kelly’s
do you know?
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 3.
ROGERS
Well come on guys don’t just stand
there, let’s get to work!
The squad then walk past Garth into the hall, he seems
annoyed. A cheerful young man sticks his head out from
crevasse.
NED
Hey! I’m Ned!
He then disappears.
GARTH
That’s Ned. Hey! Now I know who you
guys are! You’re the boys who went
insane after you let Peer Pressure
go seven years ago!
ROGERS
Don’t you ever speak that name!
Rogers pokes Garth’s chest with his index finger. The crew
are in the backround rummaging through Garth’s belongings as
if to be searching for something. Rogers begins to join them
as an odd monster-like scream is heard from upstairs. They
all pause for a moment before returning to what they were
doing before.
GARTH
Say aren’t you guys supposed to
hunt Monsters?
WALKER
Don’t worry, it’s just a
Formidulosus Spiritum.
MCCOY
Wait guys... its Thursday...
AKBAR
Oh no, sir!
GARTH
What does that mean?!
ROGERS
Formidulosus Spiritums don’t come
out on Thursdays.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 4.
MCCOY
Do you think it’s Peer Pressure?
WALKER
Nah he’s not back for the sequel.
MCCOY
And Professor Mortimer?
WALKER
Crushed by his own ego...
McCoy nods. They reach the top of the stairs. Rogers lays
his hand flat on the door and then slowly opens it.
AKBAR
Oh my Gods...
Akbar looks at the camera yet again as he says this. At last
our villain is revealed, and it is none other than Zeeloop
Waddleboop!
THE SQUAD
Zeeloop Waddleboop!
Zeeloop is wearing a gas mask, an eye-patch, a cloak, and
striped clothing.
ZEELOOP
I see there’s no need to acquaint
ourselves, Monster Squad...
Suddenly Ned appears from another crevasse.
NED
Tea? Coffee?
Everyone ignores Ned.
GARTH
That’s Ned.
The interrupted conversation continues.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 5.
ROGERS
So You’re the one who called us!
ZEELOOP
You’ve fallen right into my trap!
WALKER
Chief, I don’t think we’re prepared
for this.
ROGERS
Akbar! Backround analysis!
AKBAR
Sir. According to scanners, it
seems he was bitten by radioactive
zebra. Now he do the stripes, sir.
MCCOY
Chief, what do we do?
ZEELOOP
Your move boys.
GARTH
Not the duvet!
Garth pronounces "duvet" strangely. Zeeloop deflects the
duvet.
WALKER
Look Chief! It barely hurt him!
ROGERS
That’s impossible!
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 6.
ROGERS
God damn you Akbar!
A sad face appears on Akbar’s face.
GARTH
Whatever shall we do?!
WALKER
Wanna call it quits?
The five guys all mutter and nod their heads in admiration
of the idea but Akbar’s line is significantly louder than
the rest.
AKBAR
I would enjoy a the pizza!
MCCOY
But look guys, he’s laid eggs!
McCoy points to a corner of the room where there are several
eggs laying. Zeeloop hisses.
AKBAR
Yes, sir. It seems when male
man-zebra is missing beautiful
woman-zebra, it makes the babies
out of the anus, sir.
WALKER
Nice...
ROGERS
The world is at stake now we can’t
leave!
GARTH
Well that’s an exaggeration!
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 7.
ROGERS
Gustav, my secret weapon, attack!
(RUSSIAN DIALECT)
ZEELOOP
Why didn’t I make my force-field
canine-proof! End this madness! I
beg of you!
ROGERS
Oh I will.
Rogers takes a gun from behind his back and points it a t
Zeeloop’s face.
WALKER
Chief, the President is on the
phone for you.
Walker walks over to Rogers and hands him a mobile phone. We
cut to an extreme close-up of a silhouetted man.
THE PRESIDENT
Do it.
We then cut back to Rogers who hangs up the phone and hands
it back to Walker. The camera then begins to slowly zoom in
on Roger’s face as he cocks his gun and the tension rises.
Zeeloop then interrupts in a panic.
ZEELOOP
Wait! Please don’t do it I beg of
you!
Rogers bends down and removes the items covering Zeeloop’s
face. It is Garth Muel Kelly! We now notice that Garth is
not standing with the crew.
THE SQUAD
Garth Muel Kelly!
ROGERS
No wonder they’ve never been in the
same shot together.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 8.
GARTH
Hey guys, I went to the bathroom,
what did I mi-what?! Well if it
isn’t my brother! Blarth Muel
Kelly!
THE SQUAD
Oh...
Ned returns to hand out tea and coffee.
BLARTH
I would’ve gotten away with it if
it wasn’t for you meddling kids and
that damn dog!
The theme from "Top Gun" begins to play as the five guys
begin to rub Gustav. They then jump to their feet and
celebrate just as the Phony Squad had done in the previous
short film. Rogers and Garth then mimic a famous scene from
"Top Gun" with Rogers as Maverick and Garth as Iceman.
GARTH
You!
Garth approaches Rogers, Rogers removes the aviator
sunglasses that have miraculously appeared on his face in
this scene.
GARTH
You are still in insane... but you
can fight my monsters anytime.
ROGERS
Bullshit. You can fight mine.
They pause for a moment before they both embrace each other
in a hug. The crew then lift up Rogers and the sunglasses
miraculously re-appear on his face, similar to the mistake
in the actual film. We then cut to shots of the six
characters smiling at the camera while the actors’ names
appear below their character’s name, similar to 80’s films
like "Top Gun" and "Predator".
EXT.ROAD.EARLY MORNING
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 9.
GARTH
That’s Ned!