Any guy can get a girlfriend, but it takes a real man (or

woman) to treat his or her girlfriend right. Respect, honesty,

and a pinch of playfulness are the names of the game when it
comes to treating your girlfriend the way she deserves to be
treated. See Step 1 below to start learning "wikiHow" to treat
your girlfriend right!

Respecting Your Girlfriend

1.

1
Never lie to her. Honesty is the cornerstone of any relationship.
Sometimes, in a relationship, telling the truth can be hard, but
you should never take the easy way out by lying to your girlfriend,
even for minor, everyday things. Lying demonstrates to your
girlfriend that you don't trust her with the truth. Getting caught in
a lie within the context of a relationship can put tremendous
stress on the relationship itself and may even lead to a breakup.
[1]
 It's also important to remember that, in the long run,
telling the truth is easier than lying. Keeping a complex
web of lies straight in your head can be incredibly stressful
- just one slip of the tongue may ruin you. In the famous
words of Mark Twain, "If you tell the truth, you don't have
to remember anything."
2.

2
Respect her intelligence.[2] Just as you are free to develop your
own thoughts and opinions, so is your girlfriend. If your girlfriend
and you develop different thoughts and opinions, this is generally
OK. Just because your girlfriend has a different opinion than you
doesn't necessarily mean that she arrived at that opinion with
logic that was faultier than your own. If your girlfriend thinks
differently than you in matters of art, politics, or recreation, for
instance, the most you can generally do is to listen to her
explanation for the way she feels and logically debate her. You
may find that your difference of opinion stems from a difference in
life experiences; you'll probably find that it's not something to
take personally.[3]
 There are, however, certain types of disagreements you
should take seriously - namely, disagreements about the
parameters of your relationship. For instance, if you see
your relationship as an exclusive, long-term commitment
but your girlfriend is looking for something much more low-
key, this is something you'll need to seriously discuss
before your relationship can progress. You should also
consider how your actions would effect you in reverse, ex
.if She went to a guys house at 2 or 3 AM, would you be
jealous?
3.

3
Listen to what she says (and remember it). One easy,
surefire way to demonstrate to your girlfriend that you respect
and value them is simply to make it obvious that you're listening
when she's speaking. Do this by keeping engaged in the
conversation - responding to the things she says with thoughts of
your own - and by remembering what she says. Obviously, no one
can remember 100% percent of what his or her girlfriend says, so,
if you have a hard time remembering things, rather than trying to
memorize everything that comes out of your partner's mouth,
memorize the big, important things (place of birth, dietary
restrictions, middle name, and so on) and make a point to repeat
select minor things at later points.[4]
 It may seem cynical to purposefully pick things that your
girlfriend says to repeat later. Try to adopt a positive
outlook when you do this - think of this as making an effort
to show you value your partner's thoughts rather
than scoring easy points down the road.
4.

4
Give her your attention.[5] Partners in a romantic relationship
shouldn't have to compete for each others' attention. Show that
you respect your girlfriend by paying attention to her (with few
exceptions) when you're together. For instance, don't allow
yourself to become distracted by a television behind her at the
restaurant, a video game that you're midway-through when she
shows up at your house, or, worst of all, another woman.
Basically, spend the time that you're with your partner with your
partner.
5.

5
Reach a mutual agreement about which types of things
constitute gentlemanly behavior. Men and boys are taught to
act like "gentlemen" around their girlfriend from a young age, but
the messages they get telling them to do this can be confusing
and even contradictory. For instance, a boy's father might
chastise him for failing to pull his girlfriend's chair out when she
sits down at a restaurant, while she, on the other hand, might find
this type of behavior patronizing. The best remedy for these types
of confusing situations is to talk frankly with your girlfriend early
on in your relationship about which types of traditional
"gentleman" behavior have a place in your lives and which do not.
 It's important to respect your girlfriend's independence
by taking her wishes in this area to heart. Don't insist upon
opening car doors for her, pulling out her chair, and so on,
if she doesn't like it or it makes her uncomfortable. This
can create tremendous awkwardness in the long term.
A real gentleman knows that actual respect is far more
important than archaic displays of etiquette.[6]
6.

6
Respect her boundaries in terms of displaying your
affection. Having different ideas about the types of behaviors
that are and aren't appropriate ways to express affection is a
great way to run into conflict with your partner. For instance, if
you love to make out with your girlfriend in semi-public places like
movie theaters, but she's naturally shy about such things, you
absolutely should not ignore her feelings. Respecting your partner
sometimes means refraining from doing things that you want to
do but she does not - basically, making small sacrifices. [7]
  Consider the reverse of the scenario above - would you
want someone to kiss you if you knew that you didn't want
him or her to? Of course not. Putting yourself in your
partner's shoes like this can help you understand how
actions that might seem minor to you can be very big deals
to others.
7.

7
Be fearless around your girlfriend. One way of showing how
much you respect your girlfriend is to be unafraid about the things
you can express to her. This isn't to say that you should make a
point to reveal deeply personal information early on in your
relationship. Rather, it means that you should be open to her.
Don't be afraid to tell her how you feel - even if it's a bad feeling.
[8]
 Paradoxically, this can also mean being fearless about
expressing your inner fears. You can (and should)
occasionally talk to your girlfriend about deep-seated
sources of worry - for instance, your performance at school
or work, stressful relationships with your parents, and so
on.
2
Part
Showing that You Care for Your Girlfriend
1.

1
Be proactive. Like the vast majority of human beings, most girls
won't want to ask to be treated well - they'll want you to
spontaneously treat them well.[9] If your girlfriend constantly has
to ask for the things she likes in your relationship - like for you to
hold her hand, listen when she talks, remember her birthday, and
so on - these special things are robbed of the joy they might
otherwise bring. This can even make her feel isolated or needy.
So try to stay on the ball - make an effort to treat your girlfriend
with respect without her having to ask you.[10]
2.

2
Keep in touch.[11] It's hard to be a steady presence in your
girlfriend's life (and vice versa) if you rarely talk to her. Though
every couple will have a different natural "rhythm" of
communication, generally, you should try to meet, call, or, at the
very least, text your girlfriend once or twice a week, if not more.
This should stem from a natural urge to want to know what she's
been up to - what minor accomplishments she's made in the last
few days, what challenges she's faced, and so on.
 Be sure to contact your girlfriend on your own - don't
just respond to her calls and texts. Taking the initiative to
make that crucial first contact with your girlfriend
demonstrates that you want her as much as she wants you.
3.

3
Don't be materialistic. Nothing is less romantic than a man who
loses sight of what's really important in life in favor of his money
or possessions. Your girlfriend should always take precedence
over material pleasures. For instance, don't skip your anniversary
dinner to wax your new car. Don't neglect your girlfriend for
weeks to play an addictive video game. Don't devote your every
waking hour to your work. Keep your life in perspective - genuine
love is a longer-lasting source of joy than any material gains you
can ever hope to make.[12]
 This being said, a good girlfriend will never willingly ask
you to do things that are bad for your financial health.
Though the mythical "gold-digger" is much rarer in real life
than popular culture may lead you to believe, beware of
women that pressure you into buying expensive gifts.
4.

4
Do things "just because". It's normal for a man to show he
cares for his girlfriend by celebrating birthdays, holidays,
anniversaries, and so on with her. It's exceptional for him to show
that he cares on the days between these big events. Take your
girlfriend by surprise.[13] Celebrate your relationship for no other
reason than that you cherish it. This doesn't necessarily have to
mean booking a fancy, expensive night out - a simple love note, a
rose, a sweet text message, and other things like this can let her
know that you are thinking of her and care for her.
5.
5
Strive to be yourself around her. One of the goals of any good
relationship should be for both partners to reach the point where
neither has to put on a "nice" front for the other. Within the
context of your relationship, you should be able to truly be "you"
and not one of the characters you adopt for work, school, etc. This
won't happen overnight, but it is something that has to happen for
a great relationship to develop.[14]
 Sometimes this may mean being truthful about negative
emotions that, for whatever reason, you can't express
during your daily life. Be honest and open about these
emotions - they're part of the real you - but don't let them
become the only topic of conversation in your relationship.
6.

6
Let her know that she's valuable to you. This goes far
beyond everyday compliments, which can become rote and dull if
you repeat them too often. Instead, when you want to make your
girlfriend feel amazing, be specific, drawing examples from your
personal history and attempting to genuinely express your inner
thoughts. Also, try to adjust the "sappiness" of your comments to
a level that you know your girlfriend is comfortable with. Finally,
choose especially poignant opportunities to make these types of
comments - no matter how good you are with words, you can
cheapen your thoughts by repeating them incessantly. [15]
 For example, if you know your girlfriend is comfortable
with a little sappiness in your expressions of verbal
affection, rather than saying, "Hey, nice dress", you might
 say, "I like your dress. It reminds me of that dress you wore
when we first met." This is much sweeter and has the
added benefit of showing that you remember a small deal
from early in your relationship.
3
Part
Showing Your Girlfriend a Good Time
1.

1
Be imaginative with your date ideas. While most girls (like
most guys) will appreciate a classic dinner/movie night out,
there's no need to pigeonhole yourselves as a couple by sticking
to traditional date possibilities. Be creative - take your girlfriend to
do things she'd never thought she'd do before. Going outside of
your comfort zone can be a great opportunity to bond as a couple.
As an added bonus, non-traditional date ideas can be a great way
to save money if you're young.[16]
 One great date idea is to surprise your girlfriend by
taking her to do an activity that she's casually expressed
an interest in during conversation. For instance, if she's
previously talked about how cool she thinks aquatic
animals are, you might consider taking her to a SCUBA
diving class. Similarly, if she loves art, you might want take
her on a hike into some scenic woods with an easel and
paint to make your own together.
2.

2
Make the night about her. Your big night out is no time to be
distracted by other people or commitments. Put everything else
aside for a few hours. Clear your mind of any upcoming projects
that will require your attention and tune in your girlfriend and the
relationship you share with her.
 Be sure to turn off your phone, pager, laptop, and/or any
other distracting devices. Nothing ruins a great moment
like having to take a business call in the middle of your
candlelit dinner.
3.

3
Pay for her (respectfully). That age-old question - whether a
man should or shouldn't pay for his girlfriend on their night out - is
more relevant today than ever before, as it's become accepted
(and even expected) that a woman may pay instead. There's no
right answer to this question - the specifics of who pays for what
in your relationship are up to you and your girlfriend to discuss.
Generally, if you're responsible for planning the night, it's
recommended that you at least make a genuine effort to pay. Do
so to demonstrate how important your girlfriend is to you, not out
of an old-fashioned conception of gender norms.
 If your girlfriend insists that she should pay or that you
should split the bill, you may want to put up a token
resistance to show that you're genuine, but don't seriously
fight her on the issue. Some women can feel patronized if
their man constantly pays for them while they're out
together, so show that you value her as an equal partner in
your relationship by allowing her to pay.
4.
4
Praise her without objectifying her.[17] Your special night is a
great opportunity for expressing the sorts of naked, passionate
emotions that don't ordinarily get voiced. Feel free to be as sappy
and passionate as you like, but keep your compliments focused
on things like your girlfriend's personality, her sense of humor, the
way she makes you feel, and her aesthetic beauty, rather than
her sexiness or her figure. There will eventually be time for these
things, too, but don't cheapen your special moment by bringing
them up in a "serious" romantic context.
5.

5
Make her feel like she's special.[18] Your girlfriend is
undoubtedly important to you, so let her know that this the case.
If you do nothing else on your night out, tell (and show) your
girlfriend that she really, really means a lot to you. Everything
else - the fun you have, the adventures you go on, the time you
spend together - is just a way of expressing this truth.
 The best, sweetest way to tell your girlfriend that she's
important to you is almost always to just be completely
frank about it. Flowery, elegant language is no substitute
for genuine emotion - almost all girlfriends will be able to
tell when you're being yourself and when you're not.
Community Q&A
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 Submit

Tips
 Always put the toilet seat down. Over 40% of couples say this is a
problem in their relationship.[19]
 Gifts don't need reasons to be given. Give your girlfriend gifts on
normal days. If you have no idea what gift to be given, send her an
affectionate letter or card.

 Ask her on dates often. They don't have to cost anything: going
to a park is always nice.

 Girls are not things, and don't like to be treated like objects.
Avoid being too possessive of them or treating them with less affection
or respect than they deserve. If she is special to you, then prove it,
unconditionally.

 You may have many differences with her but you have to
know how to handle her.
 Tell her everything, don't keep any secrets from her especially if
you love her, this shows that you trust her.

 Hugs will give off the message that you are affectionate towards
her and want to hold her. Hugs are the universal medicine!

 Always speak with her affectionately.

 If you are texting your girlfriend take the time to spell out the
entire sentence, "I love you".

 Send flowers but in a different way. Send them to her at the

hairdresser, dentist office, or worst case work. Somewhere in public
that she least expects them and not her birthday or Valentine's day or
just after a fight but completely random.
Show 4 more tips
 Submit a Tip
All tip submissions are carefully reviewed before being
published

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Warnings
 Some girlfriends may have friends in your office. Never talk about
your sexual prowess in the workplace.

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References
1. ↑https://sites.psu.edu/aspsy/2014/04/13/honesty-and-
relationships/
2. ↑https://www.loveisrespect.org/content/respect-in-healthy-
relationships/
3. ↑https://iheartintelligence.com/relationship-respect/
4. ↑https://psychcentral.com/lib/become-a-better-listener-active-
listening/
5. ↑https://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-ways-to-
become-irresistible-to-women_9.html
6. ↑https://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/13-things-real-
gentleman-does-differently.html
7. ↑https://psychcentral.com/blog/why-healthy-relationships-
always-have-boundaries-how-to-set-boundaries-in-yours/
8. ↑https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-
couch/201707/how-talk-about-feelings-your-romantic-partner
9. ↑https://www.theodysseyonline.com/15-ways-to-treat-woman-
right
More References (10)
About This Article
Co-Authored By:
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75 votes - 78%
Co-authors: 96
Updated: March 27, 2020
Views: 1,004,816
Categories: Going Steady | Long Term Dating
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