4 ME Coaching Participant Guide English FINAL - Virtual April2020

Coaching
Participant Guide
Version: April 2020
Copyright © Compassion International 2018

About this Guide
This participant guide is designed as a resource for Compassion’s coaching experience. It is our hope that
this guide will also continue to serve as a job aid when you are back at work. As you go through this guide,
you will see that there are few words and much open space. This space is for you to write down things you
learn during the sessions or to reflect on how you will implement these behaviors.
For your convenience, the guide contains prompts that follow the order of the training. At the end of the
guide is a customizable action plan. You will be directed at various points throughout the training to add
things to this plan. You are strongly encouraged to share this plan with your manager when you return to
work. Together, you and your manager can ensure that you succeed at implementing the concepts and
strategies discussed today.
We appreciate you and your participation.
Blessings in Christ,
The Manager Essentials Team
Copyright © Compassion International 2018 Page 1 of 62

Table of Contents
About This Guide.....................................................................................................................................1
SESSION 1
Introduction ................................................................................................................................3
Foundation Of Trust.................................................................................................................................6
Active Listening.......................................................................................................................................7
SESSION 2
Feedback .............................................................................................................................................. 13
CI Coaching Model .............................................................................................................................16
F.A.S.T. Feedback Model ....................................................................................................................18
B.I.G. Feedback Model ........................................................................................................................19
SESSION 3
Coaching............................................................................................................................................... 23
G.R.O.W. Coaching Model..................................................................................................................24
6 Levers of Performance.....................................................................................................................31
SESSION 4
Customizing Your Communication Strategy.............................................................................................32
Corrective Action ....................................................................................................................37
Setting Up For Success..........................................................................................................................43
Conclusion .............................................................................................................................45
My Action Plan...................................................................................................................................46

INTRODUCTION
Coaching and Compassion’s Cultural Behaviors
“Serious About Personal Growth – Ours and Others”
We embrace a growth mindset because we are committed to lifelong learning so that we

can add to our faith: goodness, knowledge, self-control, perseverance, godliness, mutual
affection and love. For in growing in these qualities, we flourish in the ways Jesus taught.
We embody humility that acknowledges we do not know it all and we extend grace to one
another because our heart is a work in progress. We lead ourselves and others
courageously, leveraging our strengths and dealing with our shortcomings in healthy ways.
We create goal-oriented growth plans that we can measure. We seek trusted feedback to
evaluate how we’re doing and ask for help from others along the way, because we know we
can’t do this alone. We also understand the importance of providing developmental energy
to those that God’s calling us to build into. We embrace the transformation journey and
commit to letting Jesus influence our thinking, feelings, behaviors and desires.
 How do you think Coaching relates to personal growth?
 What role does your staff play in their own growth?
 What responsibilities might you have for your staff’s growth?

“100% For One Another”
We seek to grow our hearts so that we are confident and secure in Jesus. Doing so means
that we constantly seek the best in and for others versus being critical in spirit. We see
Jesus in others and consider others better than ourselves. We look for ways to lift each
other up, especially when faced with tremendous change and challenges. We engage in
healthy discussions, disagreements and conflict. We recognize that everyone thinks
differently, so we must get good at crucial conversations. We row fiercely in the same
direction, keeping our hearts soft for our mission and for one another. This allows each of
us to spend zero effort in guarding our individual best interest so we can instead invest in
an “our ministry” mentality. We are for one another when we are together and when we are
apart, which means we protect each other’s reputations. And because this is true, we never
waste time worrying about how others are representing us when we’re not around.
 What does this Cultural Behavior tell us about the posture we should take when coaching one
of our staff?
 What type of relationship must we have with our staff for them to know that we are 100% for
them even when we are coaching them?
 Scripture gives us good guidance when it comes to the importance of keeping open
communication, giving honest feedback and constructive coaching to those with whom we are
entrusted.

What does Scripture say?
James 1:19, “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to
anger…” (ESV)
Proverbs 12:18, “There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings
healing.” (ESV)
Ephesians 4:29, “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up,
as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” (ESV)
Ephesians 4:15-16, “…We will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is
the head of his body, the church. He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own
special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love.
(NLT)

FOUNDATION OF TRUST
“If everyone on a team knows that everyone else is vulnerable enough to truly mean the things they say, then
no one is going to hide his or her weaknesses or mistakes. Instead they develop a deep and uncommon
sense of trust. They speak more freely and fearlessly with one another and don’t waste time and energy
pretending to be someone they’re not.” (Patrick Lencioni)
Three Main Builders of Trust

Concept Description / Example
Reliability
Transparency
Vulnerability

ACTIVE LISTENING
“Careful with Our Words”
We get the power that words have, both in written and spoken form. Therefore, we listen to
deeply understand others first, by listening for what they are saying and how they are
feeling. We then reflect on what they have said before responding…
The goal of listening is not just so that we understand. Rather, the goal is for the person we are listening to,
to understand that you understand.
When we engage someone to help us reach a shared outcome, it removes the tendency toward an “us vs.
them” mindset. It is replaced with a collaborative mindset where we are now working together to solve
issues in a way that benefits everyone.
The best way to begin listening is simply to ask questions. What questions might make your staff feel cared
about, valued and listened to?

Barriers to Listening for Understanding
Barrier Description / Example
Me-First Attitude
Self-Referent
Interruption
Negation
Devaluing

Active Listening Strategies
Real, Heartfelt Intent to Understand
Give It Your Full Attention
Give Space
Empathy
Statements that Show You Are Hearing Them
Draw Out More and More

Make Room for Their Reality

Active Listening Skills Job Aid
SKILL OBJECTIVES EXAMPLES

 Encourage discussion  What do you think about…?
 Learn new information  What makes you feel that way?
Open-Ended Questions
 Help you determine feelings, opinions, and thoughts  How do you feel about…?
 Get the other person involved  Tell me your reaction to…
 Uncover facts and specific information  How long will it take?
 Check agreement  Do you agree?
Fact-Finders
 Get acceptance or commitment  What do you need from me?
(Closed-Ended Questions)
 Speed up the conversation  What is your next step?
 Control the discussion  Can you commit to this plan?
 Confirm or correct your understanding  Then you think that…
Paraphrases  Demonstrate that you are listening  So, you’re more concerned with…
(Content Summaries)  Demonstrate respect; build trust  Let me see if I understand…
 Help the other person clarify his/her thinking  What I think I hear you saying is…
 Demonstrate understanding  I can see that this frustrates you.
Reflective Statements  Show empathy but not agreement  You sound hesitant.
(Emotion Summaries)  Demonstrate that you are listening  I hear some nervousness.
 Help the other person clarify his/her feelings  You are excited about this!
SKILL OBJECTIVES EXAMPLES
 Allow time for the other person to think of a response
 Take a moment to think about it.
 Slow the conversation down
Pauses  Smile, nod, show interest or concern
 Draw out the silent person
 Share an encouraging response (“hmm,”
 Indicate you are willing to listen
“okay,” “oh,” “continue”…)
 Allow you to gather your thoughts
 Demonstrate care, respect, and that other is a priority  Give full attention; demonstrate interest
 Build trust through body language
Listening for Understanding  Help the other person feel understood  Be silent or use encouraging responses; do
 Take in new information not interrupt
 Uncover real feelings and issues  Avoid reacting negatively
 Lead to breakthrough problem solving  Have a real desire to understand

Activity: Listening for Understanding
1. Think about the people on your team.

2. Identify the one team member that you have the most challenge with or the one you most want to
develop.
3. In your group, decide who will start off being the:
a. Speaker—you will take 7 minutes to share about the team member you identified.
b. Listener—you will practice the listening skills.
Remember to listen for content—not only to what they say but also to what they feel about
it. Listen for a consequence (if there is one) and remember, do not offer solutions or
advice. You may reference the job aid on the previous page.
c. Observer (who will also keep track of the time)—you will use the Listening Skills Checklist
provided on the next page to give feedback to the listener. When the listener uses a skill,
check the box. And if you can write an example of when they use it, please do.
4. After 7 minutes of sharing and listening, you will have 3 minutes to debrief—10 minutes per round
total. Use the following questions as prompts:
a. Listener—how did using the listening skills feel? What insights did you gain?
b. Observer—what skills did you see the listener use or not use? Use the checklist provided.
c. Speaker—what was your experience, did you feel listened to? What behaviors were
helpful? What behaviors were not helpful?
5. Repeat the process until all 3 of you have played each role.
Copyright © Compassion International 2018

Listening for Understanding Checklist
The Listener _________________________________________________ (Name)
 Used empathy – experienced what the speaker is experiencing and then communicated back
both the feeling and the content and how it made the Listener feel.
 Had a real, heartfelt intent to understand.
 Gave full attention – had attentive body language such as appropriate eye contact, nodding,
leaning in.
 Stayed separate (did not react instantly – sat in silence).
 Used statements that show they heard the speaker. Paraphrased to reflect what the speaker
said.
 Drew the speaker out.
 Made an accommodation/room for the speaker’s reality – that it was really true for the
Speaker (did not judge, was not critical).
Other Observations:

FEEDBACK
By learning how to properly give feedback and coach, you will increase your effectiveness as a leader and
show that you are “Serious about Personal Growth” and “100% for One Another.” Additionally, knowing what
to say and when will show that we are “Careful with Our Words.”
Why It Is Important to Communicate about Performance

 To reinforce good performance or redirect poor performance.
 Effective communication (i.e. providing timely feedback) is foundational to your job as a manager.
 You are only as successful as the people that report to you; when they excel, you excel.
Risks If We Do Not Communicate

 Employees who do not receive performance-based communication from management on their
performance may never realize that they are not meeting their performance goals or the expectations
set for them.
 Employees may create bad practices.
 Employees may share practices with each other that are not correct, thereby multiplying a problem or
unsound practice.
 In the absence of solid and trustworthy feedback, employees have doubts about their performance.

 Employees may not grow and mature to their potential.
Two Types of Communication
Positive
 Failure to acknowledge successes, accomplishments and other positive outcomes creates an

environment for employees to feel underappreciated and can lead to distrust.
Constructive
 Communication that is “negative” often comes from a place of frustration, a desire to punish or a sense
of indignation. Communication that is “constructive” comes from a place of honest desire to see the
recipient improve and be the best that they can be.
 Crucial Conversations says that any potentially difficult conversation – such as giving constructive
feedback – must start with having your heart in the right place. If you cannot get your heart in the right
place, then you will never be able to have good, constructive conversations.
Managers giving feedback or coaching should always seek to be objective. Whether you are giving positive
or constructive comments, it should always be about the behavior exhibited and not the person. Such
observations are factual, based on what you take in with your senses and able to be proven.

Activity: Objective or Subjective Communication
1. Take the next 10 minutes to read through each statement.

2. Then decide whether you think the statement is an objective observation or a subjective
interpretation of a person’s behavior.
3. On the blank line beside each statement, place an “O” for observation or an “I” for interpretation.
Number Observation or Statement

Interpretation
1 Jamila was not sincere.
2 Tahini interrupted me three times when I was trying to explain why I

made this decision.
3 Liam did not look me in the eyes when he spoke to me.
4 Geron deliberately changed the subject.
5 Sosthenes talked about child sponsorship rates in France.
6 The repairs at the project in Ouagadougou were inadequate.
7 Marisol was discouraged.
8 Viktor forgot our meeting.
9 Eliana misinterpreted what I was trying to say.
10 Ezekiel kept talking even after I asked him to let me finish speaking.
11 Aisha’s arms were crossed, and she was frowning during the
announcement.
12 Aisha had a bad attitude about the announcement.
13 Frauke must be upset about this project because her voice is shaky.

14 Frauke told me she has a head cold and that it is affecting her voice.
Compassion’s Coaching Model
Informal Coaching (often simply referred to as Feedback) is ongoing, in-the-moment development advice
given to employees.
It is usually undocumented and may be positive or constructive.

It can be used to provide employees with a clear idea of their ongoing performance.
Formal Coaching is a conversation that happens on a regular basis, as well as when circumstances warrant.
These meetings allow managers and their staff to identify strengths and development needs, work through
challenges and help capture learning from work assignments and situations.
Coaching for Performance – the coaching you provide to correct performance and
behaviors that are not aligned with the employee goals, role, responsibilities or expected
behaviors.
 It is intentional, meaning it is planned for in advance.
 It is formal, meaning it is documented.
 It can be positive or constructive.
Coaching for Development – the coaching you provide to encourage and foster employee
development.
 It is also intentional (planned for in advance).
 It is formal (documented).
 It is always positive, because the focus is always growth toward an
employee’s goal.

Informal Coaching (Feedback)
Manager’s Responsibility: to provide continuous feedback.
Employee’s Responsibility: to respond appropriately to feedback.
Give F.A.S.T. Feedback:
 F – Frequent
o Managers should provide feedback on an ongoing basis so that employees have an accurate
and up-to-date understanding of their performance strengths and development areas.
 A – Actionable
o Feedback should help the employee to do their current job better or recognize actions or work
that were ideal for the current position.
o Ensure that recommended actions or behaviors are within the control of the employee in his or
her current position.
 S – Specific

o Managers should identify specific actions the employee took or specific things that were
appropriate or inappropriate.
o Employees then know exactly which behavior or action they should avoid or work to improve.
 T – Timely
o Managers should give feedback as soon as possible to the action or event. This will maximize
the impact of feedback on the employee’s performance and minimize the chances of
resentment if there is constructive feedback.
The B.I.G. Model for Feedback
First start by asking your employee if you may offer some feedback. Then use B.I.G. to provide feedback:

 B – Behavior
o State the behavior you observed. When you describe it, be objective, factual and specific. Avoid
generalizations like, “You always….” and “You never…” Try to focus on one issue at a time so that
you do not overwhelm with a long list of needed improvements.
o You might start it off like this, “When you…”
 I – Impact
o Share the impact of the behavior. What happened as a result - positive or negative? Who or what
was impacted? Be specific.
o You can start by saying, “I felt…,” “I thought…” or “It caused…”
o After you have shared the impact during constructive feedback, stop and allow the other person to
respond. Give them an opportunity to respond to what you have said or to ask questions to clarify.
 G – Goal
o Share your expectation for how the person should act in the future. This is the performance goal. If
you are praising the person, you might just want to encourage them to continue what they are
already doing. If you are giving constructive feedback, you may need to give a clear description of
the behaviors you want to see in the future.
o You might say, “I want/need you to…” or “I would appreciate it if you would…”

Activity: Giving B.I.G. Feedback
1. You will divide into small groups of 3 and will have 10 minutes for this activity.
2. The facilitator will give each group a stack of scenario cards or you may see the full list of scenarios
below.
3. Someone in your group should volunteer to draw a card (or choose a scenario listed below) and read
the behavior out loud. That person thinks of an imaginary staff person and says the “Behavior” they
have seen – you can use the “When you…” prompt on the card or one of your own.
4. Pass the card to the person on your left. This person then states the “Impact” that behavior had. They
will make up the impact using their imagination and again you can use the “It causes…” prompt on the
card.
5. Pass the card to the next person on the left, who then states the “Goal” or step they would like that staff
member to take using the “I want…” prompt. Then that person discards the card.
6. After you have finished with one card, choose a new one and start with the next person to the left. Make
sure you alternate who reads the first prompt on each new card. That is so each person gets to practice
a different element of the BIG feedback.
7. Be sure to help each other out. If someone cannot think of something, prompt them. Or if a statement is
subjective, kindly suggest a different word or phrase.
When you got angry with me and refused to do your

When you call in sick so often…
part of the project…
When you failed to meet a sponsor couple at the When you turned in an important team report two
airport when they came to visit their child… weeks late…
When you didn’t give me the information even though I When you took a phone call during a meeting with a
asked several times... church pastor...
When you insulted a project director in a recent

When you frequently interrupt me while I am talking...
meeting...

When you were dressed inappropriately for a meeting When you came up with an idea that eliminated several
with out-of-town visitors... steps from our process...
When you worked through the weekend to complete When you left expensive equipment at the meeting
our team presentation for the following Monday... location...
When you were impolite to the staff of a local When you complained about me to my supervisor
restaurant during a sponsor tour... without talking to me first...
When you spent a good deal of the morning working

When you turned in work for the team that was sloppy
on personal things rather than attending to your
and incomplete...
work...
When you come in late to work… When you raised your voice in anger at a co-worker…
When you decided to handle the conflict by When you act so anxious because of an urgent
retaliating… problem…
When you work too many hours and don’t get enough
When you listen to and share gossip…
sleep…
When you fail to prioritize your most important

When you lose important documents…
responsibilities and tasks…
When you argue with church staff and volunteers… When you don’t participate in our group devotions…
When you show the courage to have a difficult

When you finish a project before the deadline…
conversation with your staff…
When you found a significant way to reduce our When you pulled your team together to resolve the
expenses… problem over the weekend…

When you shared your well-researched and creative
When you worked patiently with the denominational
recommendations to improve how we partner with our
leaders to resolve the conflict…
churches…

COACHING
Formal Coaching
On a regular basis, you should:
 Encourage your employees to improve both job skills and knowledge.
 Encourage your employees to assist in problem solving.
 Encourage your employees to build new skills.
Benefits of Performance Coaching
Benefits to Your Employee Benefits to You (the Manager)

Quality coaching helps employees examine the root cause of their performance rather than symptoms. It
helps them better see where they are and where they need to be.
The G.R.O.W. Model for Coaching
G – Goal
 Begin the coaching process by establishing the goal.
 The goal could be one of the employee’s PDP goals, a skill from their job description, a team goal or a
needed behavioral change.

 Set clearly defined SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant and Time-bound) goals.
R – Reality
 Establish the current reality.
 It is best to give the employee an opportunity to first describe the current reality of the situation. This
will give you the opportunity to see the bigger picture from the employee’s perspective.
O – Options
 Explore the options.
 Work together with your employee to find the right solution.
W – Way Forward
 Establish the way forward.
 Identify what the path looks like going forward and note objective benchmarks to be indicators of
success. This will give you clear direction how to help your employee and a framework to provide
ongoing informal coaching (feedback) and future formal coaching.
The G.R.O.W. model provides a flexible framework for all coaching conversations, whether you are
identifying a new goal or working on an existing goal. It also works for positive or constructive coaching,
whether coaching for performance or coaching for development.

Because the coaching model is flexible, it will be different each time you use it.

Activity: Coaching Roleplay
1. Read the following scenario about Paul, a fictional employee at Compassion.

2. Notice how the manager incorporates the G.R.O.W. Model into the conversation with Paul.
Background:
 Paul has been a Partnership Facilitator with Compassion for five years. Since then, Paul has been
promoted to a Senior Partnership Facilitator and Team Leader. Before joining Compassion, Paul earned
his university degree in Sociology. He worked in a large retail company as a customer service manager
for 18 months. There, he enjoyed supervising a team of ten associates. Paul has a gift for working with
people. He builds long-lasting and trusting relationships.
 In his personal life, Paul is a husband and father of two young children. While Paul loves his job, the
travel required is difficult for his family. His wife wishes he were home more, and Paul is increasingly
concerned about spending more time with his children. In addition, he is taking courses in Church
Development on top of his busy work schedule.
 Paul is passionate about Compassion’s programs and his work in church development, but he is also a
bit restless, wondering what God has store for him next. He also really misses the opportunity to
develop people, to help them see what they can be and work towards their goals.
 Paul has received positive performance reviews each year he has been at Compassion. He is
considering applying for a job as a Partnership Facilitator Supervisor. While he would still need to travel,
the number of days and nights would be less. He is organized, an excellent communicator and knows
partnership facilitation very well.
 While Paul certainly has many characteristics of a good supervisor, he is worried that he does not have
enough management experience for the Supervisor role. He does not yet have his Church Development
degree. Paul also struggles when dealing with a difficult or uncomfortable situation. He avoids conflict,
even when his avoidance causes further anxiety for his team. Paul also needs to work on his skills in
analyzing issues and making decisions. While he does well in the day-to-day, when something
unexpected comes up, he has a difficult time knowing how to move forward.
 Paul asks his manager to discuss what is next for him in his Senior Partnership Facilitator position. As I
mentioned, he may be interested in making a move to Partnership Facilitator Supervisor.

The Coaching Session:
Paul: Thanks for meeting with me to discuss what is next for me in my career at Compassion.
Manager: You have been a “top contributor” in the Partnership Facilitator role. Do you know where you
would like to go from here?
Paul: I have really enjoyed my work as a Partnership Facilitator. I feel like I am ready to move into a
Partnership Facilitator Supervisor position.
Manager: Great, let us talk about what that might look like. Why are you interested in the becoming a
Partnership Facilitator Supervisor?
Paul: I enjoy managing people. I like the process of seeing what people are good at and helping them
capitalize on their strengths and developing their weaknesses. While I have experience in the role of a PF,
I also have supervisory experience. Although it has been a while, I enjoyed managing people in the past
and have received positive feedback about my supervisory skills. I already have a Bachelor’s degree in
Sociology and have been taking classes in Church Development. Also, the supervisor position will help
me make some needed changes in my family life, which is to travel less so that I can be home to spend
more time with my wife and children.
Manager: Sounds like this is a realistic goal. I want to point out, however, that although the supervisory
position requires less travel, it may require more hours and possibly some additional stress. Have you
considered those factors?
Paul: Somewhat, yes. But I realize I need to find out more about the realities of the position and discuss
them with my wife.
Manager: Let us talk about what you would need to do to get there. What are some options for
proceeding?
Paul: First, I think I am on the right track with my Church Development degree. It will help me develop my
leadership skills and competencies.
Manager: That is a good start. Is there anything standing in your way to reaching the goal of becoming a
supervisor?
Paul: I need to refresh my management skills. One way to do that would be to shadow a PF Supervisor
and get an idea of their daily supervisory tasks and responsibilities. I could also take some management
courses.
Manager: Those are good ideas. Another good way to build your supervisory skills is to act as a mentor
to other Partnership Facilitators. If you would like, I can put out the word that you are available to do this.

Paul: I would very much like to do that.
Manager: Great. Let us talk about some concrete next steps you can take on the path to this goal. What
will you do first?
Paul: First, I will make a list of supervisors that may be able to serve as mentors to me. I would also like it
if you could let the team know that I am available as a mentor.
Manager: I would be happy to do that. When should we discuss this again to ensure you continue to move
toward your goal?
Paul: Let us discuss this goal each month when we meet for our 1:1.
Manager: Great. The next time we meet, we will discuss your Church Development program and ensure
that it is in line with your goals.
Paul: I have selected the Leadership track of the program, so I am required to take several courses that
will be relevant to a supervisory role. I would be happy to talk with you about those.
Manager: Sounds good. Alright Paul, thanks for talking through your goals with me. I look forward to
meeting again next month.
Observations:

Activity: Practicing the G.R.O.W. Model
1. Write down one thing you would like to receive coaching from one of your peers about.
Possible examples are: be more comfortable when dealing with conflict, improve my time
management or organizational skills, I need to stop being late to meetings…any goal will work. Do
try to select an area you want to work on, as this is a great time to receive ideas from others.
2. You will work together in groups of 3. Each person will have an opportunity to play the manager, the
employee and the observer.
a. The manager asks questions like those contained in GROW model at the beginning of this
section of the participant guide.
b. The employee describes his/her coaching need to the other two members of the group and then
answers the manager’s questions. You will be the employee when doing your scenario. You are
getting coaching from one of your peers.
c. The observer will use the Observer Feedback form on the next page to take notes and then will
give feedback to the manager.
d. Each coaching session will last 5 minutes.
e. After each coaching session, allow 3 minutes for the observer to complete the Observer
Feedback Form and discuss it with the employee.

Observer Feedback Form
Use this form to provide feedback to the team member playing the manager role. Be specific in your
observations and feedback.
Step Did the manager ask questions from this

phase?
G - Goal Yes No
R - Reality Yes No
O - Options Yes No
W - Way Forward Yes No
What went well?
What could have been done differently?
What were the key outcomes of the coaching conversation?

Root Causes
The Six Levers of Performance
Considering possible causes for your employee’s performance will help you stay objective and plan your
approach.
What possible causes for poor performance can you think of?

CUSTOMIZING YOUR STRATEGY
The purpose behind giving feedback and coaching is to help the employee succeed and reach their full
potential.
Situational Leadership
The job of the manager is to quickly assess the learner’s knowledge and ability level and then adjust your
management style to meet the learner’s needs.
As an employee becomes more capable at their job, the less direction they require from their manager.
However, as their new role becomes more routine, the more motivation they may need from their manager.
It is up to you to adjust your communication style to match their capability and motivational level.
Reading Your Employee
Category Cues Description / Example
Sighs
Verbal Disagreement
Agreement with Everything
Shaking Head
Closed Posture
Non-
Clinched Fists
Verbal
Flush Face
Blank Stare
Passive Passive Resistance

Reacting to Your Employee
When reacting to your employee, remember:
 Your reaction must remain professional, yet compassionate.
 Always seek agreement from the employee. Unfortunately, this is not always possible.
 Always strive to show that you are 100% for your employee and are serious about his or her growth.
 Help the employee see potentially positive benefits by appealing to what he or she values.
Common reasons employees resist feedback and coaching:
 Lack of trust
 Lack of feeling appreciated
 Lack of positive feedback history
 Bad past experience with coaching

Ask questions to find out why an employee seems resistant to feedback or coaching.
Be transparent about your intentions with feedback and coaching. If you have not already done so, be
explicit about what you are trying to do and why.
The best way to prepare for the unknown is to try to anticipate your employee’s reaction as best you can and
have a plan for how you will handle things.
 Have a strategy in mind for how you will react to their reaction.
 Remain flexible and let their responses dictate how you contextualize your conversation.

Activity: Customizing Our Coaching Strategy
1. Read the following scenario about Skippy and his recent performance.
2. You are Skippy’s manager. Skippy has recently had some performance issues at work. You have tried
giving him constructive feedback before, but now it is time for more formal coaching for performance.
3. You will have 10 minutes to read the scenario and take some notes about how you would like to handle
this coaching session with Skippy. Feel free to consult any of your notes or job aids while you prepare.
On Tuesday the 7th, you asked Skippy to schedule a meeting with several church partners in the region to
discuss Compassion’s revised strategy for child protection. You were clear with Skippy that the meeting
must take place on Wednesday the 22nd. The deadline for all church partners to adopt the new strategy is
by the end of the month.
Skippy’s assignment was to determine a location for the meeting, send a meeting announcement to the list
of attendees, and prepare and distribute an agenda. Skippy received the distribution list and a draft of the
agenda from you that afternoon.
The following Sunday you attended the church of one of the church partners who was on the attendee list.
You mentioned to her after church that you were looking forward to spending more time together on the
22nd. She looked at you confused and said that she did not know anything about the meeting.
On Monday, you let Skippy know that this church partner did not know about the meeting. When you asked
Skippy if he forgot to invite her, Skippy admitted that he had not arranged anything for the meeting yet and
had not sent out any announcements. Skippy assured you that he would do so immediately. You reminded
Skippy that this meeting is extremely important and that he needs to give it his immediate attention.
On Friday the 17th, you asked Skippy how many church partners had confirmed their attendance for the
meeting next week. Skippy looked up from his spreadsheet and said, “Oops, I’ve been so involved with this
spreadsheet project that I forgot to send out the announcement. I’ll do it right away.” You told Skippy that
there was not enough time for the announcement to be mailed out and so he should call the church
partners.
On Monday morning, you asked Skippy how many church partners had confirmed their attendance and he
told you that only 10 are available because of the late notice. You decided that you will have to postpone
the meeting until the following week. You know that this will negatively impact both the church partners
and Compassion because of the short time until the deadline to implement the new child protection
strategy.

Notes on the scenario:
Strategy for coaching Skippy:
Possible questions to ask Skippy:
“Who you are becoming is more important than what you do.”
Our role as managers and leaders at Compassion is to help our employees become all that God wants them
to be. Feedback and coaching are tools to help our employees do just that, but only if we use them
thoughtfully and prayerfully.
CORRECTIVE ACTION
Corrective action is a process of communicating with an employee to improve unacceptable behavior or

performance after other methods such as coaching have not been successful.
Ephesians 6:5-9
Servants, respectfully obey your earthly masters but always with an eye to obeying the real
master, Christ. Don’t just do what you must do to get by, but work heartily, as Christ’s
servants doing what God wants you to do. And work with a smile on your face, always
keeping in mind that no matter who happens to be giving the orders, you’re really serving
God. Good work will get you good pay from the Master, regardless of whether you are slave
or free. Masters, it’s the same with you. No abuse, please, and no threats. You and your
servants are both under the same Master in heaven. He makes no distinction between you
and them. (The Message Translation)
Leaders must strive to take care of their workers just as God takes care of us all.
Compassion sees corrective action as a tool of restoration, reconciliation and opportunity. Corrective action
provides a framework for leaders to help their employees get back on track and make improvements that
will help them develop and make meaningful contributions to their team and to the ministry.

Three Manager Commitments
FIRST COMMITMENT: Follow the Coaching Process
 Provide frequent positive and constructive informal feedback. Give formal coaching as appropriate.
 If you get to a place of corrective action with your employee, it should never be a surprise to them.
SECOND COMMITMENT: Consistent Documentation
 We must accurately document discussions we have with our staff.
 We must have the ability to clearly evaluate each employee’s performance at the end of each PDP
review cycle.
 We should also keep notes for legal reasons. If an employee files an official complaint or lawsuit
against Compassion, we must be able to show documentation for actions we have taken and why we
took them.
 Documenting our conversations with employees, including the behavior, impact and future goal
surrounding an employee’s actions is an expectation of all our managers. This is a critical part of the
coaching process.

Sample Documentation Form
EMPLOYEE INFORMATION
Name:
Position:
Department:
Supervisor’s Name:
Date of Incident / Behavior:
Date Discussed with Employee:
BEHAVIOR OBSERVED:
IMPACT TO EMPLOYEE / TEAM / CLIENT / MINISTRY:
GOAL FOR IMPROVEMENT:

.
Documentation is very important when it comes to the events which may lead to corrective action or which
will be taken into consideration during the PDP or Merit processes. These may include:
 Discussion regarding performance plans and progress toward goals
 Positive or constructive feedback
 Discussions regarding development opportunities
 Crucial conversations
Activity: Documentation
1. Look back in your participant guide to the activity in our last session about Skippy.
2. Using the sample documentation form on the previous page, take 15 minutes to document the incident
and the coaching session you (we) did with Skippy.
3. Remember to use objective, fact-based observation rather than subjective interpretation.
Questions / Notes from the Documentation Activity

THIRD COMMITMENT: Always Seek Consultation with Human Resources
 Always contact your HR Business Partner (HRBP) first when you have an employee problem.
 Your HRBP may recommend a Corrective Action Discussion (CAD) and/or a Corrective Action Plan
(CAP). Only Human Resources can make this recommendation. Therefore, engage your HRBP early in
the process and provide all documentation.
o A CAD happens when informal feedback and formal coaching for performance meetings have not
corrected a performance problem. A CAD may also happen if an employee’s actions are so serious
that they immediately warrant corrective action.
o A CAD happens with the concerned employee, the employee’s supervisor (you) and the HRBP all
present. It should be made clear to the employee when you are having a CAD rather than simply
coaching for performance.
o If the CAD does not remedy the performance issue, or if the behavior so warrants, a CAP will be
established in compliance with Compassion policies, local processes and governing labor laws.

o The employee should be informed that there are specific, tangible consequences for failure to
comply with a CAP. These consequences should be made clear in the document and explained
during the meeting with the concerned employee, the employee’s supervisor (you) and the HRBP.
Remember to always work with your local HR Business Partner BEFORE taking any corrective action steps.
Most countries have specific requirements for corrective action or using CAD and CAP, so let your HRBP
guide you. The exact form of the CAD or CAP may also vary by country due to local labor laws and national
office processes.

For managers who supervise staff in a different country, it is vital that you remain in contact with an HR
Business Partner for the country where your staff member is employed.
The end goal is always to help the employee grow and reach his or her full potential. This not only helps the
employee to develop, but it helps ensure the success of your team and of Compassion’s ministry.
SETTING UP FOR SUCCESS
Why is it important to make sure your employee is setup for future success?
Outstanding employee performance and success starts with clear expectations.
 A clear understanding of job description can help employee understand the clear expectation that
manager has for the role.
 Additionally, defining clear SMART goals as part of the PDP process or when discussing goals in
the GROW model ensures growth in the right direction.
 A third way to set your employee up for success is by something called the 70/20/10 Model for
Learning.
o 70% Providing them with memorable on-the-job development experiences

 Coaching and feedback
 Stretch (challenging) assignments
 Special projects
 Increased daily responsibility
o 20% Connecting them with key relationships to help them develop

 Coaching from a manager
 Advice from a mentor
 Tips from a community of practice
o 10% Leveraging formal learning experiences (e.g. training)

 Auxano for Continuous Learning
 Other courses, seminars, workshops, books and websites.

To access the Development Power of Work (DPW) Playlist in Auxano:
1. Log into Auxano.
2. Click on the magnifying glass icon at the top-right of the Auxano home screen.
3. Type “DPW Playlist” in the search box, and press enter.
4. Click on the “Development Power of Work (DPW) (PLAYLIST)” in the search
results.
Key resources available in Auxano:

 70/20/10 Development Model Article
 Guide to On-the-Job Development Experiences
 Guide to Stretch Assignments
 Guide to Helping Your Team Get the Most out of Formal Learning

CONCLUSION
Final Reflections on Key Concepts
Foundation of Trust
Active Listening
Types of Communication: Positive and Constructive
Informal Coaching (Feedback)
Formal Coaching (Coaching for Performance and Coaching for Development)
Customizing Our Communication
Corrective Action

MY ACTION PLAN
Timeframe Goal Specific Steps
Within the next to increase trust on my team… I will… (List tangible steps here to achieve the goal)
week…
For the next three to better listen to my team… I will… (List at least one listening skill you learned today)
weeks…
When I return to to help my employees know how I will give feedback to… (List at least one team member)
work… they are performing…
about… (List at least one thing—positive or constructive)
This week… to know who can help me with I will make sure I have the name and contact information for my HR Business Partner.
employee concerns…
Name:
Email Address:
Phone Number (Extension):
And if I have not already met my HRBP, I will ask to schedule a meeting.
In the next two to make sure I am properly I will go to Auxano to look at… (List at least one resource)
weeks… equipping my team for success…
This week… to help me be accountable for I will discuss the items on this action item list with my supervisor.
improving my feedback and

coaching skills…
Ways my supervisor can support me to accomplish my action plan:

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Coaching

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We appreciate you and your participation.

The Manager Essentials Team

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About This Guide.....................................................................................................................................1

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Coaching and Compassion’s Cultural Behaviors

“Serious About Personal Growth – Ours and Others”

We embrace a growth mindset because we are committed to lifelong learning so that we

 How do you think Coaching relates to personal growth?

 What role does your staff play in their own growth?

 What responsibilities might you have for your staff’s growth?

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Three Main Builders of Trust

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“Careful with Our Words”

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Barrier Description / Example

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Give It Your Full Attention

Statements that Show You Are Hearing Them

Draw Out More and More

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SKILL OBJECTIVES EXAMPLES

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1. Think about the people on your team.

b. Listener—you will practice the listening skills.

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The Listener _________________________________________________ (Name)

 Had a real, heartfelt intent to understand.

 Stayed separate (did not react instantly – sat in silence).

 Drew the speaker out.

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Why It Is Important to Communicate about Performance

Risks If We Do Not Communicate

 Employees may create bad practices.

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Two Types of Communication

 Failure to acknowledge successes, accomplishments and other positive outcomes creates an

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1. Take the next 10 minutes to read through each statement.

Number Observation or Statement

1 Jamila was not sincere.

2 Tahini interrupted me three times when I was trying to explain why I

4 Geron deliberately changed the subject.

5 Sosthenes talked about child sponsorship rates in France.

6 The repairs at the project in Ouagadougou were inadequate.

7 Marisol was discouraged.

8 Viktor forgot our meeting.

9 Eliana misinterpreted what I was trying to say.

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Compassion’s Coaching Model

It is usually undocumented and may be positive or constructive.

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 It is formal, meaning it is documented.

 It can be positive or constructive.

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Manager’s Responsibility: to provide continuous feedback.

Employee’s Responsibility: to respond appropriately to feedback.

Give F.A.S.T. Feedback: