TASK 1: READING

The following hilarious tips are about different aspects of life. Choose
from the box and decide which tip refers to which aspect. There are
more tips referring to one aspect.

INEXPENSIVE ENTERTAINMENT SAFETY

TRAVELLING HOUSEHOLD
FINANCE DIET

TIPS WHAT DO THEY

REFER TO?
1 Never attempt to fasten your shoe laces in a revolving
supermarket door.
2 Lose weight quickly by eating raw pork or rancid tuna. The
subsequent food poisoning/diarrhoea will enable you to lose
12 pounds in only 2 days
3 At work, put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once
everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to
espresso.
4 When out driving always turn left. Then, should you become
lost, you can find your way home by reversing the
procedure and always turning right.
5 When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won!" "I
won!" "3rd time this week!"
6 Putting just the right amount of gin in your goldfish bowl
makes the fishes' eyes bulge and causes them to swim in an
amusing manner
7 Drill a one inch diameter hole in your refrigerator door. This
will allow you to check that the light goes off when the door
is closed
8 Save on gasoline by pushing your car to your destination.
Invariably passers-by will think you've broken down and
help
9 Buy a television set exactly like your neighbours. Then annoy
them by standing outside their window and changing their
channel using your identical remote control.
10 Save on electricity by turning off all the lights in your house
and walking around wearing a miner's hat
11 Old telephone directories make ideal personal address books.
Simply cross out the names and address of people you don't
know
12 During rush hour, sit in your parked car and point a hair
dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down
13 Avoid the need to pack bulky shampoo bottles, which can
leak in your suitcase, by arranging for the whole family to
have 'skinhead' haircuts a day or two before departure.
(source: http://www.corsinet.com/braincandy/)
TASK 2: VOCABULARY
Read the tips again and find which words (in bold) the following
definitions refer to.

1. a set of actions _______________

2. make holes with a special tool _______________
3. always
4. (of a liquid) escape from a hole _______________
5. decaffeinated coffee _______________
6. stick out
7. too big and taking up too much space _______________
8. automated teller machine _______________
9. tasting or smelling unpleasant because not fresh _______________
10. device for controlling something from a distance _______________
11. draw a line through something _______________
12. moving round a central point or line _______________

TASK 3: SPEAKING
Discuss the following questions with your partner.

Which tip(s) did you find the funniest? Why?

Have you heard of any other funny or serious tips to make your life
happier, more comfortable, better, less stressful?
What other aspects of life could be included in the list? (Suggestions:
physical appearance, school life, finding a perfect date, etc.)
Choose some of them and come up with your own tips and advice.
Share your ideas with other students in the group.

TASK 3: WRITING
Write an essay about your findings. (150 words)

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Answer Key
Task 1:
1 – Safety; 2 – Diet, 3 – Inexpensive Entertainment; 4 – Travelling; 5 – Inexpensive
Entertainment; 6 – Inexpensive Entertainment, 7 – Household, 8 – Finance; 9 –
Inexpensive Entertainment, 10 – Finance; 11 – Household; 12 – Inexpensive
Entertainment, 13 – Travelling

Task 2:
1. procedure
2. drill
3. invariably
4. leak
5. decaf
6. bulge
7. bulky
8. ATM
9. rancid
10. remote control
11. cross out
12. revolving