Writing Skills Week 4

Writing Skills
Module II – Building effective sentences (2)
Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Institut für Sprache, Literatur, und Medien
HG 163 | michelle.smith@uni-flensburg.de
Information Packaging (2)

Effective information ordering in sentences
Preceding Sentence fits into logical flow Subsequent

Context of surrounding sentences. Context
Starting High
Middle
Point Point

Effective information ordering in sentences
Front of the clause End of the clause

Accessible as possible Most important information
• Previous information • New information
• Readily inferable from • Primary Stress
context or general info
• Grounded or anchored
Principle of End Focus

Organizing the end point
Extraposition
It came as no surprise that smoking was banned.
That smoking was banned came as no surprise.
It appears that the government will have to back down.
Discontinuous Structures
A number of major differences have been found
between the two best-selling stomach tablets.
The question then arose of what contribution the public
should pay.
The king sent three men into exile who had dared
question his sole right to decide the fate of the country.

Dative Shift
The teacher gave me a passing grade.
The teacher gave a passing grade to me.
The teacher gave to me a passing grade.
Object postponement
Later the victims described their ordeal.
The victims later described their ordeal.
The victims described their ordeal later.
? The victims described later their ordeal.
The victims described later the horrible conditions to
which they had been subjected.
Presentatives
Underlying this argument are a number of important
assumptions.
Into this category fall a number of exceptions to the rule.
Among his other contributions should be mentioned
Einstein’s work on the theory of relativity.

What goes wrong in clause construction
Frontal overload
For MCA, at a cut off of 11 U/ml a sensitivity of 30% and a

specificity of 87% is reached.
For MCA, a cut off of 11 U/ml produces a sensitivity of 30%

and a specificity of 87%.

Frontal overload
Usually, Americans take it as a matter of course that the

American way of life is meant by Western civilization.
Usually, Americans take it as a matter of course that what is

meant by Western civilization is the American way of life.

Bad textual fit
Regular agriculture is a monoculture agriculture, where the

farmers become specialized in the product they grow or keep.
Exhaustion of the soil is caused by this monoculture: the
ground is not fertile enough to grow the same product on it
every year.

Bad textual fit
Regular agriculture is a monoculture agriculture, where the

farmers become specialized in the product they grow or keep.
This monoculture causes exhaustion of the soil: the ground is
not fertile enough to grow the same product on it every year.

Unclear focus signalling
Noise pollution will be experienced personally by everyone; in

other words, it is subjective.
Noise pollution will be experienced by everyone personally; in

other words, it is subjective.

Organizing information in the clause: overview
• Choose structures that support forward dynamics:

Accessible information  important information
• Use adverbials for framing
• Develop emphatic formulations
• Place focal element at end of structure

Exercise in sentence construction
• Use the sentence fragments to create a paragraph using the

principles of forward dynamics
• Rearrange ideas and add transitions as needed

Exercise in sentence construction
There are vital differences between Lewis and Clark's expedition

and a Mars mission. First, Lewis and Clark were headed to a place
amenable to life; hundreds of thousands of people were already living
there. Second, Lewis and Clark were certain to discover places and
things of immediate value to the new nation. Third, the Lewis and
Clark venture cost next to nothing by today's standards. In 1989 NASA
estimated that a people-to-Mars program would cost $400 billion,
which inflates to $600 billion today. The Hoover Dam cost $700 million
in today's money, meaning that sending people to Mars might cost as
much as building about 800 new Hoover Dams. A Mars mission may be
the single most expensive non-wartime undertaking in U.S. history.

Complex Sentences

Adding complexity to sentences
(A) – S – V – O/C – (A)
The author of this report has had access to secret documents.


Subject clause
Whoever wrote this report has had access to secret
documents.
Object clause
The author of this report has had access to what the secret
services have in their archives.
Restrictive participial clause
The person writing this report has had access to secret
documents.


Restrictive relative clause
The author of this report has had access to documents which
the government has not yet released.
Non-restrictive relative clause
The author of this report, who once worked for the CIA, has
had access to secret documents.

Conjunctions
Coordinating Subordinating
Join two main clauses Join dependent clause to main

clause
 compound sentence  complex sentence
MIDDLE of sentence BEGINNING or MIDDLE of

sentence (beginning of clause)
Content must be parallel!
Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Englisches Seminar

Coordinating conjunctions
For But
Connects a result with a reason Connects 2 sentences with
(means because) contrasting or opposite ideas
And Or
Connects 2 sentences with Connects 2 sentences that
similar ideas express alternatives or choices
Nor Yet
Connects 2 similar negative Shows surprise
sentences (inversion!) So
Connects a reason with a result
(means therefore)

Paired coordinating conjunctions
Both … and
He has to both clean the house and wash the car.
Not only… but also
Not only do Americans pay income tax, but they are also charged
high sales tax in some states.
Either … or
Either say something constructive or don’t say anything at all.
Neither … nor
Neither did he ask for permission nor did he give me an
explanation for his actions.
He neither asked for permission nor gave an explanation for his
actions.

Subordinating conjunctions
• Combines two ideas into a complex sentence

• Main idea is the independent clause
• Related idea is the dependent (subordinate) clause
I was very sick last week. I attended the concert.

Even though I was very sick last week, I attended the concert.
I attended the concert even though I was very sick last week.

Transition words / phrases
Sentence Connectors
• Used to link ideas from one sentence to the next and to give
paragraphs coherence.
• Perform different functions: introduce, order, contrast,
sequence ideas, theory, data etc.
• Are placed at the beginning of a sentence and refer to the
previous sentence
• Can also be used between two independent clauses with a
semicolon before and comma after the connector.

Transition words / phrases
Logical / sequential order Contrast Comparison
Firstly, secondly, thirdly etc However Similarly
Next, last, finally On the other hand Likewise
In addition On the contrary Also
Furthermore By (in) comparison
Also In contrast
At present / presently
Order of importance Result Reason
Most / more importantly As a result The cause of
Most significantly As a consequence The reason for
Above all Therefore
Primarily Thus
It is essential / essentially Consequently
Hence

Choosing linking words and phrases
Always ask yourself what the exact relationship is between the

sentences or parts of sentences.
• Are you leading to the result of something?
• Are you making a deduction?
• Are you introducing some contradictory evidence or ideas?
Your choice of word or phrase obviously depends on this.
Always check in a good dictionary if you're not quite sure about
a word's use or its position in a sentence.
Remember that punctuation will affect what you use.

Choosing linking words and phrases
He comes across as being difficult. / He is actually a very nice guy.
Relationship? Contrast
CC: He comes across as being difficult, but he is actually a
very nice guy.
SC: Although he comes across as being difficult, he is
actually a very nice guy.
T: He comes across as being difficult. However, he is
He comes across as being difficult; however, he is

Linking word practice
1. Janet is aa very
very diligent
diligentstudent.
student.Brian
However,
often Brian
plays often
truant.plays
truant.
(however)
Although
2. Ella wanted Ellatowanted
go to the tomovies.
go to the
Shemovies,
stayedshe stayed
behind andbehind
and helped
helped her younger
her younger brotherbrother with
with his his homework.
homework. (although)
Vitamin B12
3. Vitamin B12 isis an
an essential
essentialvitamin
vitaminforformany
manyland
landanimals.
animals.It In
addition,
is a criticalitingredient
is a criticalfor
ingredient for growing
growing marine marine
plants. (in plants.
addition)
Despite
4. Susan is the fact that
saddened by she is saddened
the passing of thebyfamily’s
the passing of the
beloved
family’s
dog. beloved
Susan dog, Susan
must remain must
strong for remain strong(despite
her children. for her
children.
the fact that)
Francisco’s climate
5. San Francisco’s climateisischaracterised
characterisedby bymild,
mild,wet
wetwinters
winters
and cool, drydry summers.
summers.Nebraska
On the contrary,
experiencesNebraska
wide
experiences
seasonal wide seasonal
variations, with hotvariations,
summers and withcold
hot winters.
summers(on
andcontrary)
the cold winters.

Foregrounding and Backgrounding
• Signalling status of individual pieces of information in

relation to each other and to the paragraph as a whole
• Which information is more important in your argument?
• Foreground more important information
• Background less important information
• Selective clause-combining

A. Soon after the election a number of scandals occurred.

B. The government started to show signs of nervousness.
C. In mid-term a number of safe by-elections were snapped up
by the Opposition.
D. The Prime Minister had his work cut out to keep the cabinet
together.

Focus on EVENTS:
Soon after the election a number of scandals occurred, as a

result of which the government started to show signs of
nervousness. Then, in mid-term a number of safe by-elections
were snapped up by the Opposition, which meant that the
Prime Minister had his work cut out to keep the cabinet
together.

Focus on EFFECTS:
When soon after the election a number of scandals occurred,

the government started to show signs of nervousness. And
when in mid-term a number of safe by-elections were snapped
up by the Opposition, the Prime Minister had his work cut out to
keep the cabinet together.

Basic shapes for complex sentences
Framed Sentences
X – S – V – O/C
Interrupted Sentences
S – X – V – O/C
Elaborated Sentences
S – V – O/C – X

Complex framing
Stepwise pattern
In New York, at this time of night, if you don’t pay attention, one
wrong move could get you killed.
Focusing pattern
In Athens, however, you are generally safe on the streets.
Grounding pattern
In Athens, where the incidence of violent crime is much lower,
you are generally safe on the streets.

Problems with sentence length
Keep in mind when combining information into a sentence:

• Too much information and reader becomes confused as to
important point
• Too little information and reader wonders why information
is important in context

Sentences too long?

• Restrict framing to 2 elements
• Avoid long parentheticals
• Avoid too many interruptions

New drugs and a vaccine alone are not enough to fight

malaria. They have to be combined with improved health-care
facilities, for example spraying campaigns, neighborhood clean-
ups to eliminate breeding places for the mosquito and better
environmental management including biological controls, such
as the use of fish that eat the mosquito in its egg and larval
stages. Only then can malaria be fought successfully.


facilities, for example spraying campaigns, neighborhood
clean-ups to eliminate breeding places for the mosquito and
better environmental management including biological
controls, such as the use of fish that eat the mosquito in its
egg and larval stages. Only then can malaria be fought
successfully.


facilities, for example spraying campaigns, and neighborhood
clean-ups to eliminate breeding places for the mosquito.
Moreover, there is a need for better environmental
management, including biological controls, such as the use of
fish that eat the mosquito in its egg and larval stages. Only
when such measures have been taken can malaria be fought
successfully.

Sentences too short?

• Do a quick check:
• Does the sentence have a clear rhetorical function?
• Is the content important enough to stand on its own?
• Should it be folded into another sentence?

The influences of the different continental dialects on Anglo-

Norman as described by Pope run parallel to certain
developments in the history of England. In 1066 William the
Conqueror came to England, and his followers came especially
from Normandy, Brittany, and Maine. In 1154 Henry II of
Plantagenet, Duke of Normandy and Aquitaine and Earl of
Anjou, became King of England. His vassals replaced the
reigning nobility. They came from all parts of the empire of the
Plantagenets, which contained the whole of Western France.


Anjou, became King of England. His vassals replaced the
reigning nobility. They came from all parts of the empire of the


Anjou, became King of England. His vassals, who replaced the
reigning nobility, came from all parts of the empire of the

Review of sentence construction
1. Sentence structure depends on the rhetorical function of

the information it contains.
2. The basic sentence form can be expanded upon in many
ways in order to present information in an ordered way.
3. There are three basic shapes for complex sentences:
framed, interrupted, and elaborated.
4. Variety in sentence length is important, but it is more
important to balance information load within the
sentences.

Homework
Extra Practice on Moodle:

Chapters from Writing Academic English, 4th Edition:
Chapter 10 – Types of Sentences
Chapter 11 – Using Parallel Structures and Fixing Sentence Problems
Chapter 12 – Noun Clauses
Chapter 13 – Adverb Clauses
Chapter 14 – Adjective Clauses
Chapter 15 – Participial Clauses

Homework
Continue Module II (next week, Punctuation!)

Journal Entry: How I practice English
What opportunities do you have to practice your English writing? What
techniques work (or don't work) for you? If you had the chance (or the
time!) what would you LIKE to do to improve your writing? This
question is designed to be fairly open-ended and reflective.


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Writing Skills

Module II – Building effective sentences (2)

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Preceding Sentence fits into logical flow Subsequent

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Front of the clause End of the clause

Principle of End Focus

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

For MCA, at a cut off of 11 U/ml a sensitivity of 30% and a

For MCA, a cut off of 11 U/ml produces a sensitivity of 30%

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Usually, Americans take it as a matter of course that the

Usually, Americans take it as a matter of course that what is

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Bad textual fit

Regular agriculture is a monoculture agriculture, where the

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Bad textual fit

Regular agriculture is a monoculture agriculture, where the

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Unclear focus signalling

Noise pollution will be experienced personally by everyone; in

Noise pollution will be experienced by everyone personally; in

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

• Choose structures that support forward dynamics:

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

• Use the sentence fragments to create a paragraph using the

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

There are vital differences between Lewis and Clark's expedition

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

(A) – S – V – O/C – (A)

The author of this report has had access to secret documents.

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

The author of this report has had access to secret documents.

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

The author of this report has had access to secret documents.

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Join two main clauses Join dependent clause to main

MIDDLE of sentence BEGINNING or MIDDLE of

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Englisches Seminar

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

• Combines two ideas into a complex sentence

I was very sick last week. I attended the concert.

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Always ask yourself what the exact relationship is between the

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

He comes across as being difficult. / He is actually a very nice guy.

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

• Signalling status of individual pieces of information in

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

A. Soon after the election a number of scandals occurred.

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

Soon after the election a number of scandals occurred, as a

Michelle Smith, Lektorin | Seminar für Anglistik & Amerikanistik

When soon after the election a number of scandals occurred,