April 20, 2015

YOU: February – Moody at Mahirap mahalin

ME: December – Maarte pero tapat Magmahal

These are just two of the many characters that make us totally different from each other.
We used to go on unlikely and separate ways for all of our lives. But this difference makes this
relationship alive and interesting.
I guess love is a magical dilemma – an unexpected one. What I was before is a big
contrary of what I am now. I can see how lovely that feeling I have inside. I never let emotion fill
my being – not even love. I never let all my feelings hang out; never believe in lasting love;
never let alone love win over my senses; never care much; never expect much; and never love
much. I am just an ordinary girl who hates to be controlled both in words and actions. I used to
be someone I can see checking a “PERSONALITY CHECKLIST” to eliminate boys in my way.
I’m nice; yet, a mysterious one. I like every boy loving me, but I never believe in them. Loving
is my greatest fear, at least, it once was. I want to be praised but never dwell on it. Hoping is my
greatest hatred. I just can’t help but to laugh at my predicament. Thus, seeing myself loving
someone this much always surprises me every now and then. I might have believed in Cupid in
this case.
However, hard as it is to believe in, I fell in love with YOU so deeply. And I used to ask
myself, “Why only now?” We could have met long before we had failed relationships with
anyone else beforehand. At once, as what I have told you, many years passed by without any
prince charming on my sight. But then you came, and with just one meeting I had slipped,
stumbled and fallen head over heels in love with you though at first I got hesitant of expecting
too much from you. You were just everything in a man that I wanted and much, much more. Just
so you know, I really liked you and would wait eagerly for your call or a signal that I should call
you. I am addicted to your voice. I would get cranky if I didn't talk to you before going to work,
at work and after getting off from work. And I stupidly love you come hell or high water!
The characteristics that I looked for in my partner did not hinge upon your appearance
but upon that unexplainable feeling I feel whenever I am with you. Even when we were dating,
technically speaking, you had placed me on the highest pedestal and I was afraid that I might not
live up to your expectations and high regard. And it hurts me most if you dare to say there’s
nothing SPECIAL or BEST in you: because for me, you yourself is the BEST THING ever
happened to my life even if it means my choice doesn’t go up with everybody’s truth. Actually,
you’re the BEST OF ME, dear. And I have just realized that loving is not about being with
someone you can live with, but being with someone you can’t live without. And if you’re the one
giving meaning into my life, does that make me shallow? If you’re the one I truly love, does that
make me less of a person? It might be awful to think that someday I can be your wife though I
know I can’t, but I am happy with this situation where I can get closer to you and just simply be
happy with you.
With this, I want to thank you for your all-out patience and loyalty you’ve ever given to
me. Thank you for understanding my silly sides. Thank you for bearing with me my insecurities
and anxieties. Thank you for all the efforts you exerted: for losing and tightening my shoes and
sandals, for giving me a crazy-shampoo act, for combing my hair, for buying and eating with me
my favourites, for bringing that huge pillow downstairs, for loosening up an argument with me,
for asking me to sleep, for waking me up every morning even earlier than my usual waking up
time, for patiently talking to me over the phone, for getting angry with me, for riding me down to
the city, for bringing me to the hotel, for breaking my private muscles downwards, for hugging
and kissing me and for the countless and sweetest I love you’s I ever heard. I appreciate them
all, my love. But most importantly, I thank and love you for sharing a life with me where there
are no boundaries to be crossed and no miles to be measured. I would never exchange that for
anything, and no matter what happens, I want and love ONLY YOU to have my heart.
I love you Honey. Even in my deepest sleep you’re always kept in my heart.
Te amo!