Kyle Kledzik

OGL 350: Module 4 Paper

Arizona State University

February 5th, 2020

 Peter, my neighbor, is a Chinese adult man who is very involved in his culture

and keeps a lot of his cultural values and passes them on to his children. He told me

that the definition of his culture is not defined by his Chinese ethnicity, but it is defined

by his family’s traditions. They have long lasting family traditions that they do throughout

the year. He said that his family traditions are centered around mostly art and cuisine.

His family has always believed that their celebrations and events should be centered

around their famous cuisine. One holiday they celebrate with a huge party is the Winter

Festival, which our text tells us, is celebrated on December 22 nd and is widely

celebrated more than the actual New Year. (Li, J., 1996) He told me that his mother

makes some of the best food you will ever taste. His food is focused a lot around

different herbs and spices and is also influenced a lot but other countries near China.

This love of cuisine and cooking has carried over to his life as an adult, and he takes a

great pride in cooking for his family.

When I asked Peter how he defines family, he said that growing up his family

was influenced a lot by western values, but that his Father put a strong emphasis on

having a strong cultural hierarchy. His Father was seen as the leader, and he had a

very cold, stern outlook on life. This is very common in a Chinese home. I read online,

that, “in the traditional Chinese family, the man is responsible for maintaining, providing

for and protecting his family.” (Betts, J., n.d.) His Mother was his safe spot, and though

she was seen as the weaker in the relationship, she was always there to comfort him

and his siblings. The rest of their family hierarchy was clearly defined as he was the

oldest, so he had the most responsibilities and chores, and then his younger, and then

the youngest. Each one had less chores and less responsibility. His Father was very
strict like I mentioned before, which is very common for Chinese men. Because his

Father was so strict, he finds himself being a bit less strict with his own children. He

uses a more tender approach instead of a stern approach to parenting.

Peter’s cultural or ethnic background is Chinese. He is from Northern China and

was born in Beijing. Peter is businessman and is very successful, as a Director of Data

Science at a technology company. He said he mainly just attends a lot of daily meetings

and his job is more boring than it sounds. He also said he still travels internationally to

China for business. Something in our readings that caught my eye was the fact that the

Chinese like doing business with westerners and they generally think that westerners

are very honest, trustworthy and nice to work with. (Li, J.,1996) His Father was also in

technology, as an IT Manager for a large computer software company that was

originally in China. His family moved from China to Los Angeles in the late 1980’s. Peter

never lived with his grandparents or extended family, but he stayed with them quite a bit

when he was younger. He told me remembered them being involved in a lot of their

events when they were young. His grandmother would always come over to their house

and cook more traditional meals then his parents did. He said she migrated to northern

China from Fujian when she was very young, and she brought with her a lot of their

style of cooking as it is closer to Taiwan.

Peter told me that to him, the most important meal of the day is breakfast, as he

is a big fitness buff. He told me he is all about getting the day started right with a

workout and a healthy meal. He mentioned that his parents put a big emphasis on

eating dinner together every night and that they were at the dinner table at 6 PM every
evening of the week. He said this made it harder to have a social life when he got in his

older high school years, because they even did family dinners on Friday nights.

He laughed when I asked him, but he said, “Obviously, eating with chopsticks is

something that is specific to our culture!” The Chinese have been using Chopsticks

since 1200 B.C. (Butler, S., 2013) He said as long as he can remember his family only

ate with chopsticks. His home didn’t have any forks growing up. They had only

chopsticks and soup-style spoons. He said when he was a kid, they would do a form of

what Chinese restaurants do with paper and rubber bands in the middle to learn how to

use them. He said by four or five years old he was great at using them and could pick

up any type of food. A big staple of his diet was rice and a lot of fresh vegetables.

Mostly vegetables like green onions, potatoes, cucumbers and bok choy. He said he still

eats mostly the same style today.

Some of the holidays and traditions that his family growing up and his current

family recognize each year are: Lunar New Year, Lantern Festival, the Mid-Autumn

Festival, and the Winter Festival which I mentioned earlier. He said, “We go all out for

Lunar New Year!” They rent out large centers, have dragon shows, light fireworks, make

tons of food, and celebrate for multiple days with shows and music. His favorite tradition

that they do is the dragon show. His children love it. It is very exciting and takes so

many people working together to truly be performed right, so it teaches his kids about

being cohesive and working in unison. His family makes wishes and they throw them

into the dragons “mouth.” His other favorite tradition is the Lantern Festival, because it
is a way to remember your elders. His children never met his parents, so it makes them

feel connected and he is happy for that.

People in his culture spend their leisure time with outdoor activities like golf and

tennis. A lot of the businessmen, including himself, play both sports. His family also was

very into kites and kiting at the park. They would make the kites as a family and fly them

together.

Physical touch and touching were always shunned upon on his culture. He said

that personal space is very important in Chinese culture, and a lot of different outfits that

he had growing up were to not be touched by anyone other than the wearer. He said he

can barely remember his Mother and Father touching each other and never hugging or

kissing in front of them. If they did, it was very behind closed doors. He does not abide

by this. He wants his children to see and feel affection, as he tries to raise them in a

very not stern or cold way.

Peter told me the best thing about living in the USA is the diversity. He is close

friends with not only Chinese people, but with people from all different cultures,

ethnicities, and religions. He has been able to bring traditions and values from his home

and culture to the USA and share them with his close friends. I myself have been a part

of not only his Lunar New Year celebrations, but his Lantern Festival celebrations as

well. Peter is a great person, who I see as a friend, and I am happy I have been able to

be a part of these and look forward to seeing more of his culture in the future.
 Appendix

1. What is your definition of “culture?”

2. How do you define “family?”
3. What is your cultural and/or ethnic background?
4. Did you ever live with your grandparents or extended family?
5. What is the most important meal of the day?
6. Do you have any eating habits/rituals that are specific to your culture?
7. What are your holidays and traditions?
8. How do people spend their leisure time? Sports? Movies, etc.?
9. How is physical contact viewed in your culture?
10. What is the best thing about living in the USA?

References

Betts, J. (n.d.). Chinese Family Values. Retrieved from

https://family.lovetoknow.com/chinese-family-values

Butler, S. (2013, March 8). A Brief History of Chopsticks. Retrieved from

https://www.history.com/news/a-brief-history-of-chopsticks

Li, J. (2000). Passport China: your pocket guide to Chinese business, customs &
etiquette. Novato, CA: World Trade Press.