Memoir

Document

Alia Clark
 I wrote this memoir because I felt like having basically a

book about my life would be great. And it was something I could

hold on to forever and show my future children and family. With

wring this I intended to accomplish showing picture and what you

actually believe that you have an opportunity to reflect on your

life. I hope that my story will lead to more chapters and more

memories. So I can sit back and keep the Clark family legacy

going keep going. That way the generation can be informed and

know the Clarks family history.

I dedicated this memoir to you Asa son this memoir shows you a

lot about me and how I grew up. Also it explains a lot about our

family and how we did things. You will find out some secrets and some

happy moments that we couldn’t get on film. In chapter one you will

learn about our family. Asa I want you to know and understand what it
means to be a Clark man. So I dedicate this to you and I love you and

hope you to feel more connected to our family.

Chapter: 1 (All About Me)

Dear, Asa

I am a young black woman in college that grinds hard every day

and never gives up. I am a freshman that attends Johnson C Smith

University. That’s hopes to flourish in my attended major which

is sports medicine. I always find ways to keep my self-motivation

going and that one of things I hope you have. One way is by

thinking about my siblings which is your aunt Breanna and

Courtney. Being the oldest child and with the mother like figure

not being in the home. I had to take charge and be the boss to my

younger siblings. This was kind of hard for me to be in school

and still come home have to take that mother like role your

grandpa Q he was a single father. I and

your grandma Torrez never had a close relationship. One of the

reasons is because of her addiction. It’s only me and your two

aunts Breanna and Courtney in the house. I have to be a role

model for all my siblings and little cousins. This is really hard

sometimes. I am a great big sister I make sure I stay productive.

Plus always showing positivity so that your aunts can follow. Now

me and your great grandpa we call him “papa” we are super close.
I always show so much respect to him I never try him. I never

meant your grandpa Q mother so I’m not close with your great

grandma. I do that our family is very complex such as they’re so

many different personalizes. But as family we learn how to deal

with it.

Our family will tell you that I was and always will be the

peacemaker. Every time there an issue they come to me. I am a

very level headed person and never want to our family not getting

along. I value having a close knit family that knows the meaning

of family. Your grandpa Q raised me to be an independent strong

young woman. Also I am very close with my uncle Anthony and he is

your great-uncle. He can teach you of things about life. Such as

how to change oil and, change a light bulb I realized that with

these people in my life it helped me grow. I wouldn’t be the

person I am today without our family. I will cherish the values

they have taught me and use them in my life every day. To my

family, thank you for being my rock when times get rough they

were there. I appreciate the gifts and wisdom they sewn into me

as a person. The person I am today is better than the person I

was yesterday. So I will sew these morals into you.

 I was born and raised in

Durham, North Carolina. Durham really built me into the woman

that I have become today; meaning that it has built my foundation

and things that I have learned throughout the years of my life.

It has helped me create morals such as, graduating from high

school on time, attending college, and getting my education. What

makes it a home is that I know everyone and everyone knows me,

and soul food restaurants that are not known or even heard of

here. Also all my family lives there, and every time we get

together it is always a family function or an enjoyable event.

Some people that make my house a home is my father, my

sisters, and my cousins that were raised with me since I was

born, and most importantly my dog. They make my home a home

because; they make it comfortable for me even through my hard

times. In the world that we live in it is complicated and the

majority of the time it is stressful, but being home makes it

easier to cope with certain situations. This is because I have

the support and love that I need when I get down. There is also
“No place like home”, and Dorothy (from The Wizard of Oz) was

Absolutely right when she said that and she clicked her

heels.

I am most comfortable in your Great-grandfather house, this

is because he cooks the best food and it’s the most comfy to

stay. My favorite dish that he prepares is homemade biscuits with

beef sausage and gravy; with a side of homemade sweet tea. That

makes me comfortable and secure just being there, and being in

his presence. One day I hope you will be able to meet your great

grandfather, because he has been through a great amount of

things. He is the main reason why I feel comfortable in my so

called “home”.

I have come to terms with leaving my home, by accepting coming to

a new place with a different theme and new surroundings. I missed

our family very much; it is a drastic change I had to leave our

family that I was raised with, to start a family with a bunch of

friends. It’s taken some time to learn strangers in a new area it

was all foreign to me. Slowly but surely I have

adjusted to the new environment.

Asa growing up at this point you know I was the oldest child

and that I had to basically become the “mother figure”. To your

aunts and uncles and that everything kind of fell on me. As a

young 14 year old that is when really everything started to fall

on me and I really understood that I am more than just a big

sister. So I’m not gone lie I did become the mean “big sister”

and act as if I’m the boss. This became a big issue and why I and

your aunts stayed fighting.

So in my eyes I thought I was always the target because I

felt as such therefore I always had my guard up. That made me

become mean and distant to everyone which I didn’t know how to

turn off. So that was one challenge I had to overcome. Growing

up I never really had a relationship with my mother I am from

Durham North Carolina will you see happy homes, Growing up I

never really had a relationship with my mother I am from Durham

North Carolina will you see happy homes and happy faces, . And

unity being the firstborn from both mother and father you would

think I was lucky. Well here's the truth, I am a daddy loving

daddy's girl who grew up without my mother. Growing up without a

mother wasn't easy. It is one of the worst feelings a girl could

feel. Life with no mother is like a princess without her queen, a

tea kettle with its pot.

Prom day is everything and I feel like everyone should experience

it. Getting ready can be a very lengthy and a costly experience.

Seems like it is very simple but when it comes down to it it's

not. In order to have the best prom day and to keep everything

organized is to plan ahead. First thing is to pick your color and

find your dress. The key to Finding a dress is to make sure is

fits your body while and that the color looks nice on you too.

Don’t let anything stress you out and keep thinking positive

because that day can changed your life forever. Prom is what

every high school student looked forward to before the

year ended. Basically the prom is your highlight of the nigh and

everyone would take that last dance and be happy.

Gradutuion was the best expirence and hta day I was so scared and

nevoes but at the same time excited. It’s the day I became a

women out in the real world. And I had many colleges chioces but

Smith won. Why did I choose Johnson C. Smith University? One

reason I came to JCSU because of their sports medicine program.

Perversely in high school I struggled with finding my niche.

Therefore when I heard that I can still be involved in sports

without actually playing. Sports medicine became my new sport and

the fact that I had surgery on my ankle so I couldn’t play sports

anymore. My reasons for coming to college are probably just like

everyone else. I went to college because I wanted a better life

for myself. I wanted to find a job that I would not be living

paycheck to paycheck like my parents have to. I mean, who really

wants a life like that? I know I did not want that, and that is

why I wanted to go to college, even more than is the main reason.

Another reason was I wanted to get a better education other than

just a High school Diploma. Not many places would take many

serious if they just had a High school Diploma. My final reason

for wanting to go to college was that I wanted that college

experience. I was fortune enough to get into college, so why not

take advantage of it, and get the real college experience, since

I did not really have that, High school Experience, this was my

chance, to make up for it.

My main goal for the next four years is to have my bachelor’s

degree in sports medicine. Also have a double major and that will

be in teaching. Then find a job here in Charlotte being a sports

medicine teacher that works in a high school or be a PE teacher

in elementary school. Charlotte is where I will like to start my

personal life as well such as start a family there and be happy.

Teaching children is what I really want to do because I grew up

around a lot of children and I’m the oldest. That’s one of the

reasons why I want to work hard to get these two majors. As I’m

here intending college I will be looking for internships that

matches the field I going to be in. Such as things like helping

out here at JCSU with any of their sports but prefer football and

basketball. Or find one that’s dealing with a school where I can

watch and learn how different teachers use their own techniques

and methods to teach their students. And since JCSU has one the

best sports management programs and they are known for that so

that why I’m here! My short term goal for the next four years is

to have my bachelor’s degree in sports med but also have a double

major and that will be in teaching. Fining a job here in

Charlotte being a sports med teacher in a high school or be a PE

teacher in elementary. Also Charlotte is where I will like to

start my personal life as well. Teaching children is what I

really want to do because I grow up around a lot of children and

I am the oldest. This is one of the reasons why I want these two
major and as I’m here in college I will be looking for an

internship. Things like helping here at JCSU with their spots

teams preferably football and basketball. Or getting internship

with a school where I can watch and learn how different teachers

use their own techniques to teach their students. Mr. Vincent

just always spoke positivity when I needed to hear it the most.

Plus I and he had so many things in common so he understood me.

Therefore things that I needed work on he knows how to help me.

Before we became close I really didn’t like him. He was my sports

med teacher I took sports med for 3 years.

So when I met him he came off very strict and

serious type of teacher. One of the reasons I picked this school

and major. We actually got into a little argument over the fact

that he thought I wasn’t trying hard enough. And after I clam

down about a week later. We talked and I realized that he just

saw potential in me. Things that I didn’t see in me and when we

sat down. He told me that he sees me going far and I actually

cried. Because after my surgery I felt worthless and that I had

lost all my talent. To hear that pushes me to keep going and he

really was a big part of me coming to smith to major sports med

and become a trainer.

Academically I’m okay but I would like to fully prepared

especially as far as math go. See I understand some of my

weakness and I will be getting all the help I need for math. That

way I want be behind with my math. Now one of my strongest skills

is English I think I am pretty good writer. Educational

commitment means a lot to me in so many ways. It is the key to

making sure I stay on top of my grades. Being commitment to

something is important especially when the topic or subject means

a lot to you. My short term goal for the next four years is to

have my bachelor’s degree in sports med but also have a double

major and that will be in teaching. Then fining a job here in

Charlotte being a sports med teacher in a high school or be a PE

teacher in elementary. Also Charlotte is where I will like to

start my personal life as well. Teaching children is what I

really want to do because I grow up around a lot of children and

I am the oldest. This is one of the reasons why I want these two

major and as I’m here in college I will be looking for an

internship. Things like helping here at JCSU with their spots

teams preferably football.

Chapter: 2 (Family)

Being raised by a man made me strong I could say. It made me numb

to manipulation and false penetration. It made me tough, they use

to say I was a tomboy, guys says I am too aggressive but I am

just me. A motherless child is who I am and I am proud of it.

Society pressures how much men aren't involved in their kids’

lives and my daddy has been the total opposite. My daddy is a

strong black man who beats the stereotype. He is my hero, my king

and my role model. My dad is everything I have & everything any

man should want to be.

Your grandma was once in my life at one time when I was baby

to about 8. But even then when I was about 4 she started to

become a heavy drinker and your grandpa said he tried to make it

work but he couldn’t do it anymore. So he had no choice but to

leave and take me with him. Not to mention he was still very much

in love with her and wanted to make it work. So he tried to get

help for her putting all his money into rehab and treatment

centers but every time she would leave. Or she would come out and

do well for like a month then relapsed again. Our family told

your grandpa that’s not a health relationship and he has to move

on and let my mother find her way. Until she’s ready to get sober
she’s not going to and he wasting his time and money. Of course

that hurt him but the way

When your grandma Scooby as they like to call and your grandpa Q

met my dad was about 24 and my mom was 18. Every time your

grandpa tells this story he makes sure people know that he wasn’t

checking for your grandma at all. Actually he was dating my aunt

Robin which is your great aunt. Aunt Robin was more of his “type”

which is sassy and got strong attitude. Meanwhile your grandma is

the nerd of the family the one who doesn’t come out her room.

Then many years later boom here I come kicking. My family is not

big but also not small. I love how we all have issues but still

know how to get along. As far as my daddy he is my everything

and someone I been with all my life. As a kid they told me I was

so funny and silly acting. Also that I was always trying to play

with the boys and not the girls for the most time. Another note

is that father doesn’t usually show off his feelings.

He is very strict and serious when need be. Of course he

loves me and I can feel his love in every however, when he does

it once a week or so it is clear that these actions. I feel like

a lot of the time he was not overwhelmed with love and his

attention. And these are the most precious moments you will

remember of our relationships with my father.

This is my father and it is the only thing that matters! Have the

clear understanding that there is not so much of being perfect

people. However, my father is perfect for me. He is my role model

and he is the person I want to be similar to when I will grow up.

I want to have a family and I want my children to be as found of

me as I am of my father. I love my father very much and I do

appreciate everything he does for my development and me.

When I was younger I would hurt more, now that I am older I

understand that life isn't always going to be the way you want it

but it is what you make it. I had to learn that my mother doesn't

define me, my dad doesn't either; I am me and shifting and

growing into the women that I want to be. My life experiences

have taught me to be a better women and one day a better mother

to my children that my mother wasn't to me. My mother's side of

the family doesn't even show me any recognition, like do I exist?

Do you love me? I look like yawl I am apart of yawl, light skin,

short. Do you notice me? Am I even family? I have no time to

dwell over it though I have to put my energy into something

positive to motivate me into being something none of you thought

I would be.
Chapter 3: (friends)

My friends are a wild gourp of people and we all share some

same traits. I have one best friend from back home names Muna

she is like my other half. We met in high school 11th grade

year in English honers 3. When we frist met I thougt she was

muna and stuck up because she was really good in basketball.

Funny enough she thoughti was too because she said my face

said it all. Ever since then she always been like my sister

and we got ech other back. Now the rest of my frirends we are

a big group its 6 of them and 8 all together inculding Muna.

One of the stories I would like to start with is pre-sesmter

we thought we was grown and wanted to go to this off campus

party. Sounds fun right ? yeah so we all get dressed up and do

our hair and makeup. Now none of us have a car and we didn’t
know anyone with one. So we found out how long of a walk it

was. It was only 5 min which is not far at all so we get

everyone together and ready to walk out the door. Now we walk

out the dorm about 10:30pm which is very dark outside. But we

all have pepper spray on us. And also the fact that we walked

as a group we felt more safe. So we are walking and talking we

get there it looked lame but we went in anyway. Yeah we

guessed it very lame and dry party. We stayed for about 20 min

then we all decidedwe wanted to leave. As we sgarted walking

it was fine for the most part, then all of sudden this white

pick up truck slowed down behind us. At first we didn’t think

to much ofnit we just walked faster then he said something.

And one of my old friends decided she was big and bold and she

said something to him. Which made the guy mad and allof sudden

he pulled up on the sidewalk. We all just ran away as fast as

we could, I even lost a shoe. Moral of this story never walk

anyway at night period. So that night brought us closer then

ever before. And we known we loved each other way to much to

do dumb things like that. You know you have true friends when

they support you no matter what and can sympathize with you.

Also a real friendship is everlasting and truly forever. If

miles drove you away from your back home friends and or the
other way around. That was never your friends and the real

friends come during college anyway.

 Chapter: 4 (Associates)

Hey Ms. Crystal you are my dad’s girlfriend but you

also is a person that I look up too. I see that you

are independent women with her own and don’t have to

have a man to help you. With you coming around

besides seeing my aunts and sisters you are a

positive role model. Yes at fist I and you got into a

lot but it was because I was bull headed. And didn’t

want to see any women with my dad. So I didn’t even

get to think to get to know you more. Nope I just got

really protective and watched your every move. And I

also sorry for that because you keep my dad very

happy and you support him and his kids.

Conclusion

To sum this up I’m showing you Asa my life in writing and

pictures and also videos. So you can keep this and pass it on
from generation to generation. Our family can have a visual

family tree to look at and learn about their self.