Prefinal Requirement Zamudio, Reynaldo II A.

RR22

THE BITTERSWEET TASTE OF CHANGING

I guess every living creature will not get satisfied or contented until they know their true purpose and
understand their ending stage. We will always want more and to become more than we see ourselves in front of the
mirror. We always ask what should I really be, where must I go, what am I supposed to be and where should I
belong? At my age and to the other youths, these are our frequent questions, perhaps even the young adults or worst,
the adults who have not transcended yet to their real call in life. We cannot be something or someone else that we
want unless we change. But our first struggle is how we start the change and what we are to change. In the story, all
the caterpillars know that there is more to life than just getting fat and crawl. It is good that they already realized that
there must be change but they do not know what to change, what to become, what is their purpose in life and how
can they change. To make the story short, in the caterpillar pillar, they all want change and they are so eager that
they do not realize that they are stepping and kicking other caterpillars just to succeed. All caterpillars have the same
thought of being self-centered that they will not care about the life that can be slashed by them just for their own
sake. The funny thing here in the story was at the top of the pillar. When they were on the top, they still do not know
what they are doing and what to become. Yes, they succeed being at the top of the others but they are still clueless
about what’s more to life. They continued to be greedy by not telling that there’s nothing up there. It’s one of the
world’s reality – the pros and cons of achieving change within self.

In the story, what struck me the most was the comparison of two justified decision of the two caterpillars.
The first caterpillar named Stripe continued to risk for something unknown and the second named Yellow, a bit
contented to the present but still curious and wait for where the fate would bring her. I personally when I read the
story, I was putting my feet on their shoes, I cannot also predict what will happen. I am also doubting where side to
go, either to Yellow or to Stripe but what matter most is that they gained knowledge and experience and a lesson
that they can bring throughout their living. I chose Yellow’s life and it was great. This life event of Yellow was the
answer to all of the caterpillars’’ questions about what’s more to life. Yellow was in doubt about herself, she was
uncertain what to believe. And I think, that is the first step of achieving change. You are going to ask yourself,
“What if I cannot succeed? Can I do this? What if I just go back and return to my old self?” Personally, this story is
very timely for me. Permit me to share that I have been struggling to change a part of me and I really want to have
breakthrough in my life. But I always fail and go back to my old self who is not loveable or likeable. When I am
struggling to change, I always think that it’s very frustrating and hard, what if I must be contented to be a fuzzy loser
one? But I also think, what is life ahead if I succeed? So I still tried. After questioning and doubting, the decision
making comes in. I am so happy about what the grey haired caterpillar said: “You must want to fly so much that you
are willing to give up being a caterpillar.” Indeed, I really need to give up my past self to be a new self. That’s the
only step to really change. If you change, you must go back or return to your past, but you can look onto it for life
reflection. This next line, “During the change, it will seem to you or to anyone who might peek that nothing is
happening – but the butterfly is already becoming.” was a sign and a blessing for me, I myself think that I cannot see
progress or people cannot see progress but this line assured me that something is happening that “It just takes time!”
Honestly, my heart is really flattered and overwhelmed about this reassuring. I believe God is really using a person
or an event to create an impact to one’s life. For Yellow, God used grey haired caterpillar to help her figure out her
purpose, for me, God used this story for me to reassured that changes within me is happening and it takes time, I just
have to endure and keep going so something will comes out like a beautiful butterfly. I also admire Stripe’s humility
and perseverance. In to the unknown is a very risky and hard decision but still he perseveres to know the unknown
and he is able to share it to others, his realizations and testimonies. He admitted that he is wrong and let him be
helped by others to change. He learned so much about life and will never regret since he transcended and become
what he must become.

When I was reading the story, God gave me a message by remembering His Word. What speaks to me is
about repentance. I can compare the word repentance to the plot of the story. For me, the part where the caterpillars
are so greedy to make it on top by kicking and stepping the other caterpillars displays sin. When Stripe and Yellow
turn their back to sin and start a new life, it displays repentance. God gave me this word 2 Corinthians 5:17:
“Therefore if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!” This Word
Prefinal Requirement Zamudio, Reynaldo II A. RR22

translates the changes or transcendence from caterpillar to a beautiful butterfly. In Ezekiel 36:26: “I will give you a
new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove you your heart of stone and give you a new flesh.” For me this
story is a great example to the Word of God given to me. Yes, we want change and the world has formulated and
make something to deceive us. Who would not want to risk if something is promised to be beneficial at later time?
All of us wants the best for us. In the caterpillar pillar, all the caterpillars were attracted and tried themselves to
achieve the top but all their life was not worth it, they are just becoming their bad versions to achieve for
themselves. The third verse that I want to share that God gave me and make me remember is Romans 12:2: “Do not
conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test
and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will.” In the story, all caterpillars are conforming to
others – bandwagon it is but the message here was to just trust the plans what God has for you. Yellow and Stripe
realize that being on that pillar will let them lesser good so they not continue, though Stripe is a little bit late than
Yellow but still he was able to transform.

The learning and insights I gain this time is about the process of knowing our true purpose. For me, you do
not need to step or kick everyone who is keeping you away from your own plan. You just have to trust what’s God’s
plan for you. Changes takes time, it has process before becoming someone else. As Yellow did not do something but
God used grey haired caterpillar to help her figure out. Even she did not achieve the top of the pillar, she must not be
dismayed because God has His purpose. Romans 8:28 said “And we know that God works all things together for the
good…” Stripes achieve the top and realize there’s nothing up there, it is still God’s will so that he can know what
life is really is. Everything happens for a reason. Change does really have pros and cons. If you want change, there
are hardships, there are success, and there are always time for everything. Maybe we may not understand why this
situation is happening to us but at later time, after this process, all is well and it is worth it. In the cocoon, it’s getting
darker and darker, it displays that in the process of changing, it’s leveling up, and it’s getting harder and harder as
you endure the levels. You will realize that “Ah, this thing happened to me because I can use this situation for this
level. Ah, God tested me about patience because after I endured and learned to be patient, I will be patient to this
level.” Again, God works all things together for the good.” This story speaks a lot about life that I am very grateful
to have read this.

As a student, I seek for changes. As I am promoted to the next year level, it’s getting harder and harder.
There are times that my people or also I cannot see the progress but there is really something happening. There are
times that I am discouraged and feel depressed but it is normal as my cocoon gets darker and darker. I must always
remind myself that change is a process. Time will come that all I have endured will all be worth it. I seek for change,
I doubt for change, I endured for change, and in the future I will become a big change – competent with a heart
health provider, a nurse. I was once an engineering student, that time I thought that was also my calling because my
parents said so, and my high school friends is taking engineering course too. Yes, I was like Stripe, I learned there to
save myself by stepping and kicking others but when I reached the top, I was not happy and found nothing, there I
just learned most how to be greedy but not be genuine and become what is really inside me. I can say that change is
also about deciding to be and not to be. I climbed down and reflect. I thought that I was just forced to push and let
others die, but my true calling is to give helping hands and care for others. I want to become a nurse and soon
become a doctor. God still works all things together for good. There is a change of heart in me. In the lesson, it says
there that I need to transcend fear of failure and embrace the possibility of success and I know I am doing this
already. I took the courage to be in a different environment and tried to be someone else. Before shifting, I
encountered a very dark past and struggles, I lost my closest friends and got betrayed. It was hard, I say. Nursing is
expensive than engineering, I cannot pay for my tuition fees, but God showed His goodness by giving me
scholarships that I will not worry because the total assessment fees was paid already. But now, I got slashed in that
scholarship and did not know now what will happen. As a student to become a professional, I am enduring a lot. But
I know now that this is just a process of stage that I must triumph. As a person, God is continuing to mold me like a
pot. He is always giving me tests to achieve to become a better person. He tests my self-control now and I am
enduring it, I stumble and fall but still rising. I am always wondering what and who am I after ten years. I already
message myself in Messenger. I chatted myself: “Hi Reyn, I hope you are doing fine and well now, I hope you are a
successful nurse now and endured what God is testing you. I hope you already achieve the change you are supposed
to become. The time that you are typing this is that you are experiencing COVID 19 and you’ve got no scholarships
awaiting for you next school year, you’ve got no money and you are crying because of this struggle. I hope you’re
Prefinal Requirement Zamudio, Reynaldo II A. RR22

happy now by the time you’re reading this message. God bless!” I did this for me not to forget the process of change
I have endured. I am afraid that if I am successful, I’ll be proud and boast so this message might remind me about
what I experienced.

Yes, like a tunnel, if you will enter a hard tunnel, it gets darker and darker, there are falling debris, and
there are snakes, bats, and fears. This tunnel gives me growth, progress, evolution, revolution, adaptation and
accommodation. At the end of that hard tunnel, you will experience paradise. You can now breathe and experience
all the fruits of labor. You can now give hope to others by testifying your life. I have to acknowledge the help of my
roots why I’ll become like this, it’s because of my family, my environment, my culture and my role models. As the
butterflies gives hope to the flowers by sipping nectar and spreading the pollens, I will also sip to my success and
share it to others and give hope to everyone. Like those caterpillars featured in the story, I know I am also meant to
fly high and not to climb. There is only one direction if you are climbing and you are susceptible to be unfair with
others. But if you fly, you can reach a lot of directions and you cannot be unfair with others but you can help them
achieve their goals.