Chapter 11

Dear Abby,
I’m concerned because my ten-year-old daughter’s grades have been dropping. It’s
been a tough year for her. She has already begun menstruation, and it is on the heavy
side. She’s about five feet tall and has a BMI of 29. She’s missed quite a few days of
school because she says she can’t breathe, but I wonder if she is just having problems
with friends. What should I do?
Big in Baltimore (Chapter 11, Letter 1)

Dear Big in Baltimore,

Thank you for reaching out. As parents, it is normal to feel that way because we wanted them to
succeed and be happy. Every child’s progress is different. There is a possible reason why her
grades are dropping. She might be experiencing stress at school or the fact that she feels a little
insecure because she started her period early. I would recommend you schedule an appointment
with her pediatrician. We need early identification and early intervention. If you wait until third
grade, kids give up (Stern, 2015, p. 1466). Early intervention will help your child cope up with
her grades, and as parents, you will be able to help her better. A BMI of 29 is not good for her,
she is overweight children more likely to experience asthma, although asthma affects all age
rates are higher among school-age children. In this situation, I would recommend talking to her
about the possible problems she might have with her peers. Talk to her about if she has a hard
time understanding her lesson, let her feel that you supported her, make her feel that you are
there for her. Support is a big factor at this stage of childhood. 

Best regards,
Abby
Dear Abby,
My daughter has a real struggle focusing in her class. Her teacher thinks she may have
ADHD, but she doesn't seem to be hyperactive. I wonder if she is just bored in school?
It seems every time a child’s mind wanders, we cry “ADHD.” Isn’t it normal for children
to daydream? I know I did. Is ADHD genetic? Is it more common for girls? It seems
children with attention deficit disorders are everywhere. Do we just have impatient
parents and teachers or is something wrong in our society? Do you have any
suggestions for helping my daughter?
Daydreaming in Dallas (Chapter 11, Letter 2)

Dear Daydreaming in Dallas,

Thank you for reaching out. Children with attention-deficit/ hyperactivity disorder are often
inattentive and usually active and impulsive (Berger, 2018, p. 325). Children diagnosed with
ADHD commonly struggle with paying attention. Would display a self-focused behavior which
means inability to recognize other people’s needs and desires. Daydreaming is common in
children diagnosed with ADHD. Children with ADHD aren’t always hyperactive and being a
quiter and less involved compare to other kids. Concerning your question, if ADHD is genetic,
genetics plays a role in ADHD but also an environmental factor as well. I would recommend you
set an appointment with a child psychiatrist to examine your daughter. Proper diagnosis is very
helpful. In the meantime, the best thing you can do to help your daughter maintains a positive
attitude with your daughter. Believe in your child, show her that you love her, and you are there
for her no matter what.
Hope this helps.

Best regards,
Abby
Chapter 12

Dear Abby,
My seven-year-old son’s schoolteacher referred to him as a concrete operational
thinker. What does that mean? She mentioned something about logical concepts.
Should I be concerned? He seems perfectly normal to me.
Concrete in Concord (Chapter 12, Letter 1)

Dear Concrete in Concord,

Thank you for reaching out. Your seven-year-old son's way of thinking is normal. Concrete
operational thinker means a child is characterized by logical operations. For example, they can
understand conservation, and understand rules. They will be able to understand simple math problems,
and they are not focusing on objects and appearance like preoperational thinkers. Piaget’s term for the
ability to reason logically about direct experiences and perceptions (Berger, 2018, p. 339). Your son can
apply the logical operation. In the concrete operational stage, they become less egocentric and more
rational. This is nothing you should be concerned about; it is a good thing!

Best regards,

Abby

Dear Abby,
My ten-year-old seems to remember things that are important to him but always forgets
things that are important to me. It’s a bit frustrating. Is he taking advantage of me? How
effective should memory be at his age? Is it common to be better at remembering some
things than others?
Forgotten in Fremont (Chapter 12, Letter 3)

Dear Forgotten in Fremont,

Thank you for reaching out, well this may be frustrating as parents, but this is normal for a child to
remember things important for themselves but forgotten things that are important for us. Your son is
not taking advantage of you. He may be just been thinking things that are important for him. It is normal
for your son to experience that. Your child’s memory advances from infancy to age 11. From 9-11 years,
old memory becomes more adaptive and strategic as children become able to learn various memory
techniques from teachers and other children. They can organize material themselves, developing their
own memory aids (Berger, 2018, p 345). Memory is better when the action is repeated. Just in your
son’s case, he would remember things that are important to him because he is doing it repeatedly. One
thing that could help your son is going through your schedule and talk about it. This exercise will help
your son remember things that are important to you. Be patience with your son, show him your support
and love.

Hope it helps,

Best regards,

Abby